She opened her eyes… and stared.
She was back home, back at Mother Sri-isopanisada's Cyber-ashram and temple compound.
She could see the tall walls that had protected them until she and her husband had returned to the lord's eternal abodes. She could hear the small river in the back and the sound of birds.
Not that those were real birds, it was a simulation, after all.
The ground was dusty despite having been swept, and in the near distance, the temple spire beckoned to her.
But… there were no sounds of life.
Draupadi closed her mouth as a frown overtook her features. Of course, it would be empty.
"Well.. at least the backup worked," Draupadi spoke to the empty 3D space. An illusion of a reality she longed to exist.
She got up from the ground, and looked at herself; she realized that she was back in her favourite black and red Sari with yellow and golden decorations.
She sighed; she felt as if she was back home, and now with her favourite dress…
"But, how did I manage to return to this place?" She asked aloud. "Last I saw it; it was getting corrupted and destroyed. Is it really… Why am I back in the Backup? Why did it recover now?" she asked as she walked through the front garden that led to the temple and the two ashrams.
Everything was empty, and not even the imaginary birds could hide this fact.
It's creepy, and the liminal space intensifies the closer she gets to the sacred space.
But before she came in, she washed her feet and hands, sprinkling some water on her head and processing what had just happened.
She had met Jagannath again in the house of one of her lovers.
Her favourite lover.
The one who had taken to Krishna-Bhakti without Draupadi's aid. A natural bhakta, something that came from his previous life.
Who had he been before he left his body and got stuck in an iron maiden?
Draupadi shook her head and touched the entrance of the temple room, putting the foot dust of her superior on her head as the best of decorations and blessings.
Keeping her eyes on the ground, she entered the room and located the bell and rang it…
"Ah! Draupi, it's been ages!" She heard her Guru-ma speak.
Fear filled Draupadi's heart. She wanted to catch a glimpse of her saviour, of her Guru. But fear of this being her mind playing a nasty trick on her.
She felt her Devotional mother's hand on the corner of her jaw, forcing her to look up into hazel-coloured eyes cradled in velvet chocolate and hidden behind a pair of golden glasses, the hundred and eight braids, her blue sari with branch-like patterns, the crows feet and skin fold born from a life filled with bliss and laughter.
A glorious life of Bhakti.
Sri-Isopanisada's lips split in a smile showing her perfect, imperfect teeth. "Hare Krishna there, Daughter; it's been a while."
Draupadi burst into tears as she flung herself into her Guru-Ma's arms.
~0~
"Well, now that's a pickle you got yourself here, Draupi." Mother Sri told her disciple as she lovingly braided her hair.
Draupadi had tried to serve her eternal Guru, but the servant's long-time servant had more experience and, using the Cyber-elf's vulnerable state, sat her down and began to take care of her hair, all the while hearing the Blonds epoch in the 'normal' world.
Draupadi spared no details. Exposing all that she did in her poor attempt at preaching while keeping her new family together. Polluting herself in the process.
"That's quite the chip you got off your shoulder, dear."
"Yeah, I know," Draupadi whined as she rubbed her face in both disgust and frustration. "I just… I had no idea what to do. If I saved X and brought him to the resistance… Well, It seemed like a good idea at first, but after what we've learned about Ciel and how Elpizo took over, it would have ended in an even bigger disaster. What to say about the guardians, the human council and whatever else is lurking out there, waiting for a weakness."
"Yes. Didn't have much choice there."
"No…and I… I've killed so many reploids in my life; I didn't want… I'm not as strong as I used to be." she shamefully admitted.
Sri-Isopanisade gently tugged at Draupadi's half-done braid. "Now there, Hun. I reckon that you've gotten plenty powerful. Were you any weaker, I'd gather that Neo-Arcadia would be but a hole in the ground since killing X would have been easier on you and hopping through all them hoops as you did. And yet, here you are, X is sane and Practicing, and in total, you know, have five husbands."
"Not quite… Leviathan is coded as the only girl and…" Draupadi blushed.
"Yes, and you love her enough that you didn't just leave her high and dry."
"No… She's not a bad person and…."
"And she's the one who helped the Lord Manifest in Phantom's home, and she saved your life while you were overheating, and despite the lust that inhabits her, she still tries to rein it in for your sake," Sri Spoke as she continued her braiding endeavour. "Bhakti's not about giving up on the thing; it's about how you can use it in Krishna's service."
"And how am I to use Leviathan?" Draupadi asked in Frustration. "Sometimes, I wished I would've just given up everything and lived in Vraja until the end of my life."
"Yes, and you would have kept your chastity, but your four-and-a-half husband would've run after you, and you would've had to either kill'em all."
"Yeah… that wasn't going to happen."
"Besides, While Bhakti will stop all Karma from blooming and seeding, you still have to go through yer due, honey bun. It ain't fun, trust me, I know. But think about it, Draupi, Krishna made the whole thing a whole lot less worse then if ya were still just a robot."
Draupadi sighed as a grateful smile appeared on her lips. Yes, Krishna still took a whole lot of Karma from her already, and what was left was Krishna-Karma…
It was more than she deserved, to be honest."
"But, enough of this what-if topic; I heard you started your own little Hare Krishna Venture?" Sri-Isopanisada asked, her voice bright and happy.
"I did! It's just a little Cafe tucked away in a thrift store. And I also have a book table with whatever I managed to print out." Despite herself, the legendary Draupadi could not help but show her enthusiasm at the prospect. "It's… taking longer then what I would like since I'm not compatible with any modern computer, and… apparently, trying to change my coding language would, according to Xiu ying, erase everything that's me and make everything moot to point."
"Oh, Krishna-Bhagavan, that would be horrible." Mother sri Isopanisada gasped.
"Yeah, Thank God my Husband caught me in time." She shuddered to think of the likely outcome.
"Which one?" Mother Sri-Isopanisada asked with an unseen glint in her soulful eyes.
"Max… X."
"Ah, you mean the one who's like Arjuna, the favourite lover of Draupadi."
Draupadi raised her head, surprised at what her Guru ma had just told her.
"You know, dear. I never saw Gaura-Krishna so frustrated in my life." She began. " and we're talking about God, the one with Unlimited everything."
Draupadi felt her cheek heat up.
"Do you have any idea why?" her Guru-Ma asked as she moved in front of Draupadi.
For her part, the Blond Cyber-elf began fiddling with one of her forelocks. "Well… Krishna asked me, personally, to initiate X… to be my husband's Guru."
"Buuuut?"
"But… I was… cheating on him and… well, the Husband is the wife's spiritual master and… and I'm by no means an example." Draupadi wrings her head. "Of course, it's not a new dynamic between us. I was the one who trained X in the art of fighting, but…" She chewed her bottom lip, careful not to pierce it. "But this was fighting… in the Vedic Paradigme, I'm an outcast, a polluted woman… a Prostitute."
"Just like Cintamani, Bilvamangala Thakura's Guru." Sri-isopanisada reminded her disciple.
"But Kintamani wasn't tasked to initiate by God in person…." Draupadi blushed. "Oh."
"Well, it seems somebody is having a Yudishtira moment."
"I… The Vedas are the voice of God for all, but if Krishna tells you to do something that's considered sinful by Vedic aphorism, then you do it because God's words are above all."
"So… why did you wait for so long?" She heard the Lord's unmistakable voice, and when she rose her head to see him-
There he was, in all of his glories. As blue as a filled raincloud about to burst, his ever-youthful face defeating the glories of the full moon, cradled by blackish blue curls with shark-shaped earrings swimming in their pearl-filled waves, a peacock feather perched by the flower braid binding his topknot. His cherry-red lips were the two baits of King Cupid's deadly trap, and she was a she-deer enthralled by them. His long eyes were filled to the brim with love covered with divine mischief. He wore a golden yellow garment that shone like lightning on his hips, showing his delightful calves and ever-sought-after Lotus feet.
On them were delicate ankle bells made of the purest of gold and philosophers' stones, it seemed that the stones were trying to compete against the Lord's toenails and losing badly. Same as his numerous and priceless toe rings…
And yet, this form of pure bliss made manifest in the human form of the perfect teenager whose complexion the clouds, sapphire, tamal tree, blue lotuses, fresh mascara and the sky had tried and failed to emulate within his belly the sum total of existence.
This was God, Krishna, the Source of all the Vishnu incarnations, one of whom dreamed of material reality and manifested numerous dream-like universes where all the host of conditioned souls resided temporarily. He was the Supreme and absolute truth, the master of all universes, the Master of Shiva, Parvati, Brahma, Sarasvati, Narayana and Lakshmi-ji.
He was God, Yehovah, the One.
He whose will is reality and unbreakable laws and whose desires reign above everyone else.
Yes, so Draupadi felt great shame at how she had treated Krishna's order, calculating it as something with material consequences and not something divine and, above all laws.
"Shame in myself…" Draupadi admitted as she bowed her head.
She felt the tip of His petal-like finger, cooler than morning dew dancing on newborn rose buds under her chin, raising her head higher until she could taste through her purified eyes the sweet, Lotus-like face of God.
New and fresh, always pleasant… It was the fact that cured Draupadi of all ills and blinded her to anything else.
"Draupadi… you did the needful, and I can confirm that, indeed, would you have remained a chaste wife to one man, then there would've been no one to give the holy name to." The Lord spoke with gentle words. "What you did was for something higher than swarga; you did the needful… and you did it for Me."
"Krishna, please bless the world that my acts will not make women more unchaste than they are now. They all see me as their queen, a great person, and they will follow my example…" she sobbed. "I don't want that."
"Then they won't, and if they do, it will be for the same reasons as you," Shyam promised. "And yes, I will protect them Also, as long as she did it as an offering for me; otherwise, Yamaraja will deal with them."
Draupadi closed her eyes, knowing the power behind those words.
"Now, my dearest friend, you need to wake up; you still have much to do in the material world."
~0~
Back in Phantom's futon room, the four siblings were all surrounding Draupadi on the cotton mattress, each holding a part of her body.
Leviathan was cradling the favourite blond's head in the pillow of her thighs, the golden braid wrapped around her waist as she assisted Draupadi's overworked system with her nitrogen cooling lines. The ice guardian was gently caressing her lover's face, tracing the tilaka mark that seemed to glow on her forehead and through her gem, the traces glowing worryingly dull.
Fefnir was kneeling to her right, gently massaging her hands as he looked ready to go get his frustrations out on some poor maverick to go back to his room to vent to Billy, his favourite orchid.
At Draupadi's feet were X and Phantom, and while the leader of the shadow army was clearly worried about their shared paramour, X just kept gushing about Phantom's work on his wife's new pair of feet.
One would think these actions to be inappropriate when their collective wife/lover was unconscious, with her life signs so low, they were practically nonexistent.
But... after years of wars and strife, one learned many styles of coping mechanisms.
That... and X... X just knew this would not be the end of his Draupadi since he had seen her faint often during times of great spiritual exultation.
His wife, his saintly Draupadi, tried hard to hide them, and at first, X had thought something was wrong with her coding or cooling system, but after a few trips to doctor Cinnamon and the best scans and bug check later, it had been revealed that, while Draupadi ran differently coded then all other reploids, nothing was wrong in her system, everything was running smoothly despite her age, and that her crashes had an external reason, but not what one would expect.
But, after reading a wonderful piece of literary work called the Nectar of Devotion, X realized what was afflicting his saintly wife.
It was called pure ecstatic love of God, where her divine emotions would overwhelm her mechanical body and force her to shut down. The blue bomber also theorized that, since the body of Zero was not the original body of this soul, she would get overwhelmed more easily.
And it seemed that the Lord was taking a mischievous type of pleasure by teasing his maidservant as such, and Draupadi would always be somewhat flustered once she returned to her external senses.
Meaning that no, X wasn't worried... much.
-" And flexible too. Oh, I still can't believe the amount of craftsmanship in those pairs, and you're telling me that this is just a hobby for you?"
"Yes, Master… yes, Max," Phantom answers as he uses the other foot as a fidget toy, averting everyone's eyes.
"Max, I know you've been living under a rock called the Nexus, but Phan-phan here is into footsies~." She teased with a sing-song voice. Hiding how scared she was for her Draupadi.
"Lebi, please leave Phantom, and his… err, hobbies alone. There is nothing wrong with it." Fefnir groused with reddening cheeks. "I mean, it's not like you have a hobby either."
"Hey, shopping for deals is a perfectly good hobby, I'll have you know." Leviathan defended. "Same as decoration and clothes washing."
There was a stunned silence in the room.
"Wait… you like to wash clothes?"
"I do," Leviathan said with pride. "There is nothing better than removing stains and mending clothes, and don't get me started on hand washing."
…
"What?"
"You're a girl, and you like washing clothes." Fefnir deadpanned.
"Listen, I only look the part; I don't have the parts." Leviathan huffed. "And there's nothing wrong for a girl to like girly things, and there's nothing wrong for boys to like girly things too! Or Manly things too."
"Well, I don't like girly things." The fire general's cheek began to burn stronger than his fire.
"You used a sweet-smelling sugar scrub… also, how come you use human bathing things like that?" Leviathan asked with a smirk that hid genuine interest.
"Shut up; it's none of your business." He grumbled as he returned his attention back to Draupadi.
"He likes the smell better, and I don't think gender roles can easily stick to us unless we want to." Phantom added to Fefnir's between hiss of 'traitor.'
X could not help but smile at this interaction, free from awe and reverence and filled with familiarity. It was imperfect and held plenty of good nature teasing and jabs, but…
It felt right.
It felt like home.
"Yo, bro!" Fefnir turned to his elder brother, causing this warm, gooey feeling to bubble in his electro-heart. "Do you remember Dad?" He asked. Catching X off-guard.
"Ah… not personally; he was already dead and gone when I woke up; I… We're his last…" With what the legendary reploid now knew of reploids and how to make them, calling Doctor Light his father felt… honestly wrong.
"Max?" Phantom tentatively asked, "… should we tell them?"
"Tell us what?" Leviathan asked, still holding Draupadi securely. "It's… bad, isn't it?"
Max pressed his lips. "Do you know what it takes to make a reploid?"
Sometime later, both ghosts in the shells were now… not feeling like they wanted to know about their dad much anymore.
"But… from what I've heard from Draupadi, Doctor Light, despite how we came to be, still cared for us…"
"Wait… how old is Draupadi again?" Phantom asked.
"Well, if you are talking about Zero, he was found by an unfortunate group of hunters around two hundred ninety years ago, but her system information dates her to be much older than that."
"She still remembers Doctor Light a bit," Max added as he began to massage the feet of his beloved. "She said he was a kind master, most of the time, and that while inserting spirit souls in doll bodies is considered demoniac, he still cared for them enough to fight for their rights." X gave a wry smile. "She... doesn't like to talk about the past, and I know she's hiding things about... dad, but... she told me that over him and Wily, he did the least amount of trouble for the world. Apparently, Doctor Light's rival, Albert Wily, had a thing for stealing Light bots and programming them onto evil, requiring my big brothers, Rockman and Protoman, to euthanize them."
"Dang, that's harsh," Fefnir commented with a grimace.
Yes… and Doctor Wily, Zero's maker, was also…"Then X paused as his CPU began to spin over time.
"X?"
"Draupadi… Zero was made by Doctor Light; she used to clean around the house, same as my elder brother Rock."
"... Does it mean we're hitting on our super hot sister now?" Leviathan asked with a smile that hid her discomfort.
"We don't have DNA… so it should be fine… right?" Fenrir asked as he turned traumatized and pleading eyes toward the eldest., waiting for his answer.
X opened his mouth as he tried to deal with the morality of it all when Draupadi began to stir.
"Oh, Crap, she's waking up!" Fefnir 'whispered' in panic.
"No shit, Sherlock." Leviathan shot back with an equal whisper.
"Draupadi? Draupadi, it's me, X." Max began as he let go of his wife's new foot and scooted closer to her head, holding the blond's left hand in his. "You are in Phantom's bedroom, in Neo-arcadia. I'm holding your left hand while Fighting Fefnir, your other husband-"
"Yo~"
"Is holding your right, Hidden Phantom is at your new set of feet and Leviathan is holding your chest and head up, your heatsink is wrapped around her waist to keep you cool. You are safe; no one has their weapons with them to save mine. Understood?"
Draupadi opened her eyes…
And…
Nothing.
Max felt his internal component churn. "Draupadi? Zero? Maverick Hunter Zero! Lorollei!" he spoke with more and more urgency as his beloved wife remained unresponsive.
A shudder of dread coursed through the soon-to-be poly-group.
This… didn't bode well…
~0~
On the altar, overlooking the drama, a comedy was underway.
"Oh no." The lord of the universe uttered as he covered his lovely mouth with his lotus hands.
"Brother… what did you do this time?" His big brother Balarama asked as he leaned over to look at his little brother.
"I… I spoke to Draupadi."
"You mean my sister wife?" Subhadra asked as she hid her smile under her richly decorated veil.
"No… I mean Dipavali." He gestured to Draupadi's unmoving body. "I… Touched her face… and."
"You got intimate." Balai deadpanned.
"No… I didn't even kiss her." The Lord denied as a pair of blush lotus bloomed on the vast expanse of his full cheeks.
"You sound as if you wanted to." Balarama teased.
"She's not ready yet."
Balarama rolled his eyes at Brother's statement. "Oh, she's as ready as you are. You just don't want to be controlled by yet another one." he waggled his brows.
Krishna scowled. "Oh, Hush. as if you're any better." He expertly shot back as their little sister cackled between the two.
The Supreme Personality of Godhead returned his attention to the four souls sold to his pure devotee. His dearest Draupadi Devi Dasi, a sweet maidservant of his.
She has my Radha's strength of character; it's a shame she's not ready to let go of her husband yet.' The Lord thought with deep fondness.
Still, he needed his friend to remain in the material world for some more time, and her going through her last stage of ecstasy was not going to work well at all.
"My dear sister." Krishna addressed Subhadra. "Please, once again, cover Draupadi."
"Enough that she can function as the chaste wife of five pious men, but not enough for her to forget you."
"Yes," Krishna confirmed with a head wiggle, making his shark-shaped earrings dance. "But not yet."
His siblings looked at their life and soul quizzically as the three souls surrendered at Draupadi and began to panic and despair at her lack of reaction to various stimuli.
But before grief could take over, Phantom held onto his Guru's feet and began to sing.
"Hare Krishna~ Hare Krishna~ Krishna Krishna~ Hare Hare~. Hare rama~ Hare Rama~ Rama Rama~ Hare Hare~" The dark one sang sweetly, addressing the Lord with all of his heart as he begged for him to give back Draupadi to them… if He so will.
Catching on, X followed, as equally surrendered as a phantom.
Tears fell from God's eyes as he heard the name of his beloved dance on the tongue of the two fortunate souls, the two surrendered servants of Draupadi.
Then… Leviathan followed, as with Fefnir.
With a grateful grin, The Lord sobbed and laughed at the miraculous sight…
He had been waiting for literal eternity for those souls to return to him.
Draupadi, by her presence, had infected so many with the Karuna virus, having planted the holy seed of the Bhakti-lata, the creeper of Bhakti, in the hearts of many.
Without having to tell his illusory potency, Maya covered the Acharia's consciousness and knowledge with the 'reality' that she was the spouse of X, or Max, and the lovers of the four guardians, the owner of the Govinda cafe and the transcriptionist of the past Acharia's holy works.
And yet, the one aspect that would never change was her eternal position as Sri-Isopanisada's maidservant… the most glorious of positions.
Jagannath-deva, Subhadra ma and Balarama wiped off their tears of love and gratitude for this brave soul. They would never forget her sacrifice, and they would never stop repaying all that she did for Them.
For it was God's eternal vow…
~0~
Back with Draupadi… The only thing filling her mind was how Krishna was gone, her Krishna, her sweet Krishna, her best friend.
"~Hare Krishna~ Hare Krishna~."
'Oh Krishna… Oh, Krishna.' Draupadi thought as she swung her head from side to side as she flew into the sweet chanting.
And then… it stopped.
"Hey! Why did you-" Draupadi was about to ask when she opened her eyes and realized just who was in the room.
Her Max was holding her left hand, Fefnir her right, while Phantom shamelessly hugged her feet to his core.
And around her waist were Leviathan's arms.
Then she felt… a kiss on her right hand and heard a sob.
"Oh, thank God… Thank God!" Fefnir all but wept as he hugged her arm closer; Phantom looked close to tears, same as X.
"Ah.. guy's? Can you… umm… I'm guessing I fainted again?" It happened so often; perhaps it was due to her system churning out more heat than it could handle, but… well, she never had X and the rest of her lovers reacting like this.
Also… why were they all in the same room, all holding different parts of her body… right in front of her dully wedded husband?
The anxiety this produced was astronomical.
"Please… Never do this again." X begged.
Wow… her ecstasy must've been pretty intense then… Well, obviously, since her Guru-Ma manifested in her mind to impart her with a mild scolding and some sorely needed instructions.
Yikes!
"It… wasn't really in my power," Draupadi stated as she tried to ignore that her hair (heatsink) was rather intimately tied around Leviathan's thin waist, her tights being her pillow and Draupadi's internal temperature being more or less normal… for someone fighting down a blush.
Yeah, so… despite how she felt about Leviathan at first, even she would admit that she was rather pretty. Like all of them were.
Moving on!
"Say… Max. there's something important we have to talk about." Draupadi began, trying to impress how important it was despite having The touchy-feely Leviathan nuzzle her neck and kiss her cheek.
"Di-zi… I was so worried. Please don't break my poor heart, love."
Many expletives ran through Draupadi's mind as she sent a worried glance to X and the rest of the guardians.
X… did not look at all disturbed to see his sister all over his wife. 'He must still think I'm his chaste and dedicated wife with a friendly rapport with his sister. Draupadi thought bitterly.
And yet... even God told her it had been the right choice for this particular situation.
"Yes… you worried us all so much, Zaki." X added as he kissed his wife's knuckles. "And I already know what you want to tell me."
Draupadi said nothing, letting her rudimentary brow do all the talking.
There was no way he'd known God had told the fallen woman she had to initiate her five husbands… meaning even Harpuia would get roped in this group.
It was… a Gamble, for sure. But if God told her to do it… and her guru, then what else could Draupadi do?
"Draupadi… I know that me and my siblings… have been sharing your affections." Cold dread doused Draupadi, but Leviathan prevented her from saying anything before she could continue.
"We already… well, X already knew." She admitted as she cuddled with the fallen woman.
"But." Fenrir picked up. "We all know why you did it, Bae…" He spoke uncharacteristically quietly. "You… You don't want a war."
"And much as we want to deny it… You did prevent us from fighting for your attention. " Phantom continued, fighting through the bitter admission. "You… are an amazing woman, and your qualities have taken the heart of not only X… but all of us."
"And we." X continued. "We… have talked about it. We know what you let us all play with you, and we know why you did this." X's smile never falters. "And we… as much as it sounds… you know."
"Get on with it."
"Draupadi, your namesake, had five husbands from the moment Queen Kunti told Arjuna to share whatever nice things he had received with his four other brothers. For if it were the case, an all-out war would have broken out…" X said as he quoted the Holy Mahabharata.
And indeed, Queen Kunti was a wise woman, and, seeing how things would turn out, had ordered her son as such.
Her wedding with the Pandavas, despite being fraught with incredible dangers and hardships, had remained strong until their 'death' as they had hiked the Himalayas.
"Di-zi… I know you've only tolerated my grabby hands because a war was what you wanted to prevent… you did, by the way. And… you brought us all together, like… I fight less with them; we feel less stressed, and… yeah, we're better."
"Yeah… You sacrificed yourself for everyone… and I… I find this super… I can't say Sexy cuz it's not strong enough, but… it's super attractive, and… yeah, you're perfect, babe. Absolutely perfect." Fefnir spoke with a voice filled with raw emotions. "This... this is the mark of a true Hero, to do whatever it takes to save as many as possible." the Fire general bowed to her. "I..."
"Draupadi" X once again caught the attention of his wife. "In the best-case scenario, my siblings would understand that you are my wife. That would be that. In reality… we have all fallen heads over heels for you, and all of us know we would have started a war, there would've been infighting, and Neo-Arcadia, the last bastion of Humanity, would be turned into a chaotic crucible." The legendary blue bomber admitted. "This... I've already run the simulation a thousand times, running all the variables possible, and I can confirm that... that Neo-Arcadia is infinitely lucky you have such a big heart."
Draupadi could see the fear and tension that flowed from all of her... lovers. It was the fear one would experience when he realized how close they had been to tragedy.
It was... humbling.
X raised his head and spoke again. "my sibling and I... we had an overdue conversation. Many, in fact. And we… we would be honoured if we could all call you our wife, just like the Pandavas your namesake."
Phantom squeezed her feet. "But we won't exploit you… no, we won't be five exploiters…"
"How do you feel about having five servant spouses?" Leviathan asked. "Personally… I think it would be an experience. We could exchange notes about how to please you, and if you wanted to take a break for one-"
"I… Sure." Draupadi spoke, still reeling from what was happening at the moment. "I… It's up to X."
"Well… I think there are not many options available that would make everyone happy. But how about you, Zaki? What do you want to do? And please, don't ask for my opinion; I'm asking this as your disciple right now."
"My disciple…" Draupadi Devi Dasi breathed out as everything sank in. "What do I, the eternal soul, want…"
"I want you all to continue your Kirtana; I won't accept a single spouse if they won't chant the holy name." She crossed her arms imperiously. "I'll be all of your wife, no problem. But I won't compromise my path of Devotion for you guys. You better jump the Bhakti boat, or I'm… I'm leaving; Krishna can find another Acharia." She declared.
"But, you already…" But before Leviathan could finish what she was about to say, X threw a house slipper at her face. "Hey!"
"Alright, Devi. No more taking your time for your devotional practice… how much do you need?"
"I would say six hours is a minimum… but considering that my job at the cafe is eight hours-"
"Can we help at your cafe?" Fefnir asked. "I mean… not as the guardians, but as some normal workers."
"As much as I would love having you around, people would recognize you… And they would talk."
"You are worried you're gonna start a trend, don't you?" Max asked as he began to gently rub his wife's stiff shoulder.
"Yeah… harem, one man, many women is more beneficial than having… what we're having." Draupadi gestured at all of her finances, a bright blush burning up her face.
"Man can release semen more than once without much of a consequence while a woman has to wait for ten months and go through childbirth. It's… a minimum of two decades in which the female is at its most vulnerable." Phantom spoke up. "Following this logic, to have one male be the genitor among a group of women means more children, but-"
"But at the time this system was implemented, only Kshatriyas, powerful warrior kings, could have more than one wife since they had the means to maintain all of those kings wanted descendants to carry on with ruling of the land, maintaining all that lived in their kingdom… but in this fallen age of Kali, a normal man barely has enough to take care of a single wife… a wife that's working even harder then him, and with even less gain."
"Ouch…"
"And even if he had the means and training to take care of more than one wife and their children, the female nature of fickle and easily angered and dissatisfied. I remember one pastime in the Srimad-Bhagavatam where only one wife of king Citraketu managed to get pregnant while a thousand others grew jealous. They killed the child to get the king's attention back."
Now, if the three reploids were instead human, they would be as white as a ghost. "Not only that, but a man in this situation has to be able to maintain all of his women mentally, physically and spiritually. And in this day and age, it's just not feasible."
"Unless they all work." Leviathan piped up as she hugged Draupadi closer, going as far as smelling her head. "But, to be honest. Marriage and monogamy went out the window when the birthrate plummeted. As you said, the more partners the man can have, the more progeny can happen. And as for taking care of them and their kids, Neo-Arcadia provides."
"And does it work?"
"It does… a bit too well," Leviathan admitted with an awkward grin.
"The model shows that, if we don't start expanding our search for habitable land, the careful balance between Carbon generating life forms and Oxygen generating life forms with tilt, and Neo Arcadia won't be able to maintain everyone optimally."
"So we need space. Have you checked if there was any patch of land untouched by the destruction?"
"No, not yet; the human council blocked our efforts until you came in; we will start the moment you feel better," Fefnir promised with a salute. "For now, though, it's all about you, Babe." He gave his winning smile, causing Draupadi to blush and Max to chuckle fondly.
"Max…" She addressed her first and foremost husband. "How do you feel about this?"
"Free… and fully feeling." He grins. "I feel like everything is more or less aligned. I feel… fully in love with you." He admitted with a blush. "Just like… no, not even when it was just the two of us."
"Alright… Oh, and God told me I had to give you your initiation, and Guru-ma also gave me her blessing, so… I just need to explain to you what it means and… yeah, I'll make you a servant of God and give you a new name." She finished lamely, mentally exhausted by the day's events.
"By your look, you would rather have that tomorrow," X spoke gently.
"Yeah, I…" Draupadi let out a laugh. "I can't believe you guys are all ok with this… with… us…."
"Eh, it's a challenge, for sure." Fefnir shrugged as he left a sweet kiss on the viral queen's knuckles. "Good thing we love challenges." He purred.
"And the first Challenge is: what do we do if more than one of us wants to spend time with Draupadi? What are the bedroom schedules, and how do we perform Kirtana?" Leviathan listed.
Hearing this, Draupadi sagged into her…
"Levi." She asked as she affectionately held the blue Guardian's powerful arms. "Should I call you a Spouse? A wife? Or a Husband?"
"Hmm… I spouse, I don't want to make this more complicated, you know." Leviathan spoke flippantly. "Besides, we're reploids, we have the same gender as cell phones."
"Please don't say that," Draupadi spoke as she hid her smile. " We're more than mere cellphones; we're spirit souls in Mechanical bodies."
"Mechanical bodies whose only gender is a mere letter on a piece of paper. Unlike humans."
"Let us not go there, please?" begged Draupadi.
"Right, point is, we're not human bodies."
"No, we are eternal spirit souls in mechanical bodies, ghosts in a shell." Phantom piped up as he held Draupadi's brand-new feet to his chest.
The thermal duo stared at their reclusive brother owlishly.
"... you know, I can smile."
This caused the group to burst into laughter, whatever tension they had left.
And, indeed, the Vaishnavi, now following the dharma of her name, felt as if she could finally breathe fully, for she was now, shockingly enough, in her natural position.
~0~
One day, Andrew decided to visit his friend and Bhakti Mentor.
It was a few days after the official announcement of her updated marital status, and needless to say, the internet was in an uproar.
Draupadi, who had vowed to remain by X's side, was now in a relationship with his other guardians.
Apparently, she had included Harpuia in the list, but as she said, the last thing she wanted was for Neo-Arcadia to be destroyed in a fratricidal war over her hand.
Needless to say, it had sparked numerous debates on numerous forums, but as Draupadi had said.
"My intention is not to have them all pleasing me but to have a nation still standing."
He shuddered; what a queen.
Speaking of the queen, there she was, cleaning the patio of her God-given Caffee, and she was not alone; Fefnir and Leviathan were with her, helping their wife set up the chairs and the massive umbrella.
Inside, he could detect X's presence, the same as Phantom. Andrew would have loved to be able to hack the cafe's security system, but he was a changed Reploid; there was no way he would do that.
His wife, even dead, would never let him live it down.
"Oh, Andrew Prabhu!" Draupadi chirped Happily as she whipped her dust from her hands. "Please come; it's been some time since we last talked."
Andrew chuckled warmly. "Indeed, Mataji, indeed." He hobbled to the patio, sitting on a chair offered to him by Fefnir. "And how are you, Draupadi? I would suspect that you have gained quite the notoriety after the last bomb you gave Neo-Arcadia."
Draupadi shrugged. "And what was I supposed to do? If I kept it a secret, then I would have to deal with even more vultures." She informed her friend. "We've set up a public chat to answer all questions."
"You mean; Chaos in text form."
"Oh, it's not so bad," Draupadi waved his concern off. "The moment I put Krishna and Bhakti in the chat, most just ran away. Besides, we have literally nothing to hide since, you know, none of us wants those updates."
Andrew shuddered in disgust. "Good to hear. But speaking of which, I can see that you have another pair of feet." the old reploid, also the most senior, smiled.
"That's all my Phantom's work. I swear, this guy's a professional." She praised. "He made me realize whatever footjob I got in the past was just butchery at that point. Really, It's only by Krishna's will that I managed to trek through the desert and still be able to stand."
Leviathan's tinkling laughter resounded in the early morning air. "Oh, Di-Zi, You walked over three hundred miles by foot in less then a night and then proceeded to fool us all, stylishly climb the Gauntlet and beat up your husband back to sanity. Don't sound so humble, dear; Krishna's not the one who walked you there."
Draupadi's face turned neutral since, technically, that's what had happened. But sure, if Krishna wanted her to have this fame, then she would carry this damn fame. But Krishna would have everything else And this particular fame too.
And this declaration, Fefnir chuckled and added. "Yeah, bae, still remember how you came in. Covered in oil and sand, humbly stood in front of us with glowing tilaka and cables big enough to bring Neo-arcadia to its knees. And what to say about the look." he winked.
Draupadi fondly rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well, if you don't finish setting up the patio, I'll show you another look."
"Alright, alright. Can't make our Swamini all mad now, can we." Fefnir drawled as he returned to his task. "C'mon, Leb, let's finish up while Swamini talks to her first disciple."
"But… wasn't X her first disciple?" Leviathan shot back
"Well… yeah, but… just for the Zeroite, Not as a Hare Krishna, you know?"
"Right, right… how do you think this group reacted?" Fefnir wondered out loud. "I mean, sure, they may be listed as a bunch of terrorists, but-" He trailed off, knowing that his communal wife was listening intently. "Right… back to work, I have to make this as spicy as possible."
At those words, Andrew returned his attention back to Draupadi, who now looked a bit more… fretful.
"Draupadi, did Phantom tell you about them?" He asked.
"Yes… he did… still, I'm not that hot knowing that my followers were treated like that… they didn't blow anything up, did they?" Draupadi asked as she began to fiddle with her braid.
Andrew chuckled. "Oh no, X made sure that those would only preserve your memory… and I've made sure that no one would corrupt your memories either. And… I was the one who introduced them to Krishna consciousness."
At this admission, Draupadi's eyes opened wide, and her mouth fell open. "Wait… you…"
"I didn't want to fade in complete obscurity after X… turned. And I definitely didn't want you to be turned into an icon like Lord Jesus for his fanatic followers. You gave us so much, Zero. You have no idea how the world changed because of you. And before you start telling me about how you started this whole mess when you infected Sigma, know that this was but an act of Karma. You didn't do it knowingly, and what happened after that can only be described as an act of God."
Draupadi nodded. "Yeah, something so big's basically the global level of bad karma catching up to us. And I've made my peace with what happened a long time ago." She shrugged. "We survived the apocalypse, and now, we must restart the whole Spiritual Age again. And to maintain it better, this time."
"Indeed." Andrew nodded gravely. "Actually… Your followers would happily help you in this endeavour of yours."
"So I've heard Phantom is one of yours, right?" Draupadi asked as she accepted a glass of coolant from Leviathan, thanking her spouse with a glance of mercy.
Andrew received the same, but this time, Fefnir had been the one who provided the drink, with a shamed blush as he rubbed the back of his head.
: Hey, man, I know it's like… way not enough to repair all the shit I did but… I'm sorry about killing your buddies… yeah, ok, even this sounds shitty to me. If you need something, ring me, and I'll be right over.: The firefighter sent sheepishly before returning to his task.
'Uh… Never expected that to happen.' He thought as he took a sip from his drink, feeling the pure water and flavour feed his old and obsolete system.
"Now… I… I am here as the representative for all the sane Zeroites."
"So, not the fanatics then," Draupadi spoke with a readied eyebrow.
"No, of course not," Andrew confirmed, to the great relief of the communal wife. "It's… mostly from me…"
"I'm listening."
Taking this as his cue, Andrew placed his half-drained glass down and went down to his knee, then laid on his front as he touched the feet of Draupadi.
"Please, Guru-ma, accept me as your disciple," Andrew asked with a wavering voice, his emotions causing his old voice box to glitch. "I have no firewood for a sacrifice, and I had no time to find straws to put between my teeth, but please, take me… take me back home, and let me serve you for all eternity, you one of Sri-Krishna's dear maidservant."
From his position on the floor, Andrew could not see the absolutely aghast exterior painting Draupadi's handsome face for a split second before she smiled and shook her head. Sending a joking glance at the makeshift altar where Jagannath, Baladeva and Subhadra watched the events unfold in front of their unblinking eyes.
"Alright. Not that you have that much choices Guru-wise." She said as she put her feet on Andrew's head. "You are a student now. And I am your spiritual Master. You are now under my order and protection." she said." Later today, I will give you your new Tulasi mala, your new Tulasi Neck bead, and you're new name," she explained. "My instructions are thus… chant Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare, Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare. Give Krishna to others and share what you know of him. Worship his words and the Words of the previous Acharia, Srila-Prabhupada, and respect his disciples, gran disciples and great-gran disciples. Do not indulge in unoffered food, and to those whose body is made of Flesh, tell them to turn to plant-based meals. Don't indulge in Ilicit sex," He noticed his Guru give a tiny flich, despite the fact that her citation had been a unorthodox one. " have one wife if you need to, and raise all progeny to be Krishna conscious. No intoxication and no more gambling. Which means no card playing, and Video games."
"Oh my… that's quite harsh," Leviathan mentioned, breaking Andrew out of his one-pointed attention to his Guru's words.
"Bhatki is all about the art of dying. If you die remembering a video game character, then that's how you'll be born as, or born in."
"Ah, and considering the drama that happened in those games," Andrew said as he kneeled back. "And, let's be honest, Krishna did tell us that those who can remember him at the time of death would reach his nature… and Srila-Prabhupada also said something along the line that we should not waste time in useless endeavours."
Those words caused a merciful smile to stretch his Guru's lips. "Got it in one."
"I will admit, though, I have gambled quite a bit in my life, and I… I do still indulge in it but… I will indeed stop it. I'm already offering whatever I wish to consume to Prabhupada."
"Start with me, since I'm now your living link to him now. Just use my pranam mantra, and I'll take care of everything, ok?" Suddenly, Draupadi stared at him, her head tilting as she frowned.
"... have I said something wrong?" he asked, wondering if his new Guru (and long time role model.) could have divined his old and obsolete identity.
'Oh God, I hope not.' Andrew wasn't proud of his past, and would rather leave it well buried under the rubbles of Sigma's pipe dream.
"No… you… reminded me of someone I used to know." she thankfully waved him off.
Internally, Andrew noted that he would have to come out to his Guru-ma eventually. Since he doubted it was shastric to hide anything from his spiritual master.
"I see… so, what was the last one?" he asked instead, unwilling to reveal himself so soon to Draupadi-Zero.
She already had enough on her plate, and he loathed to add more.
And if Krishna willed it, He would not mind having his old Identity die with him without anyone but God knowing about it.
"You need a reminder already?" Draupadi asked with a playful smile.
"No, not at all. You know we can't forget things that easily." Andrew smiled. "But… I do admit that I'm so old, my RAM sometimes skips some data."
"I see. hopefully, you'll be able to reach godhead before your disk becomes corrupt."
"It is my hope also," Andrew spoke as she took a sip of water.
"You will also have to start chanting sixteen rounds of the maha-Mantra." Draupadi devi Dasi continued. "Basically, you need to get yourself 109 beads and then you need to string them like so." the saintly mother reached in her bag and pulled out ancient wooden beads, blackened by time… or linseed oil, if his nose had anything to tell him.
The old reploid scanned how the rosary was strung after each bead, there was a knot, and it went thus until 108 beads were securely tied. At the apex of the Mala was a bigger bead with a pompom on top.
"I see… may I ask what type of wood is it?" Andrew Asked as he took as many pictures as he could of the sacred relic, touted to have been exported in front of the divine ashram itself.
"Tulasi wood. You know, the plant that began growing in and around Babel tower?"
"Ah yes, the one you fainted in extasis when you first laid your eyes on." Andrew smiled at the memory. He had been blessed to witness his Guru showing something that was usually hidden from all.
"Well, can you blame me?" Draupadi spoke with a blush decorating her moon-like face. "I never saw Tulasi-Devi in her full glory, and the only manifestation I had was a mere program aimed at simulating plant growth." she huffed as she leaned back. "I... I never expected her to spontaneously appear in neo-Arcadia, of all places. Around the tower, to booth." She still smiled as folded her palms, thanking the lord for this amazing Miracle. "But, yes. Tulasi Devi's wood is the best to chant the Maha-Mantra on. But you can't kill her for it. Ask Fefnir; he will find you a dry specimen and make you some beads."
"I already have a mala made for him." Fefnir piped up; then he addressed Andrew. "So, you want it Raw? If you want it soaked in flax? With a cotton thread? Silver wire? Nah, you know what, I know the perfect one for you, man. BRB!" and with that, Fenfir was off.
The Bhatkivedantis started at the receding back of the fire General, then back at one another.
"... Let me guess, he feels guilty about how he treated us as a group or rebels?" He asked his Guru.
"Yep... and Levi wants to give you a garland of lotuses as an apology, but since she doesn't want demi-gods to think that she wants to marry you also..."
Andrew chuckled as he felt his cheeks warm up. "Oh... This is the Lord's Mercy. On behalf of all the resistance members, online and offline, I accept Neo-Arcadia's apologies. No need to keep a grudge." Again. "I have more important things to think about then the far past and how I was hurt. I... Won't forget what they did... but I can definitely forgive them and move on. Besides, how bad are they really when they have all fallen at your Lotus feet?"
Swamini Draupadi bashfully inclined her head in all humility. "All things considered?" she said as she glanced back at her spouses busing themselves around the altar, Leviathan providing the water to clean the floor, and Fefnir greeting Genevieve and TK like a pair of dignitaries. X… Max happily embraced the stylish reploid while the human woman happily made her way to her Guru, stopping to talk to Phantom, giving him a USB key hidden small spider plushy.
"Not bad at all." she gave a bright smile. "Not bad at all."