Adrien was exhausted from the press conference. No, he was absolutely crushed. He'd been so, so stupid. And more importantly, he'd let his Lady down.
In the car, he'd taken a catnap. It had surprised the Gorilla, but he just let his chosen sleep. Lord knows he needed it. All those flashing lights and cameras and reporters had really gotten to his head. But even as he slept, he couldn't avoid dreams of Ladybug. And Dream-Ladybug was pissed. The fight seemed difficult- there were tons of holders- and Chat had been a no show. He just couldn't get away from those reporters to transform. And part of him just wanted his father's support and attention. Dearest Gabriel would literally kill him if he found out that he had snuck away during the conference. So he just couldn't. And though he knew that Ladybug had won the fight in the end, she always did, he'd abandoned her, and he felt terrible about it.
When they got home, he couldn't get to his room fast enough. He didn't even bother stopping by his father's office to tell him about the conference. He'd be too busy anyway. He always was.
"I'm home! Gonna shower!" Adrien absentmindedly called to Nathalie as he rushed up the stairs. She must have responded, but didn't hear. He was already slamming the door of his bedroom.
He threw his bag down and turned on the shower. "She must've contacted me, Plagg. She must've," he told his kwami. He hadn't realized how anxious he was. The event had run later than expected, and as soon as he got out of there all of the anxiety of abandoning his partner hit him like a bus. What if he got his miraculous taken away?! What if she really needed him? What if she got hurt?!
"Plagg, claws out," he said urgently, hoping that no one could hear him over the sound of the shower he was supposedly taking. What an unfortunate waste of water, he thought distantly at the back of his mind, though that was at the bottom of his priority list and his father was rich and did not care. He instantly transformed into Chat.
He desperately hoped that Ladybug hadn't needed him too bad.
He quickly flipped open the catphone on his batton and his heart stopped. Fourteen messages?! Guess she needed him pretty bad, huh?
"She must be furious," he muttered out loud. He had the sinking feeling that he was about to be one dead cat.
He didn't bother listening to any of her many voicemails- he assumed they were much of the same thing- Chat, where the heck are you!? Get your butt over here now, this is all your fault, etc. etc.
A sudden thought tugged at the back of his mind and he remembered the time she ditched him at patrol. He'd left a similar number of messages, but she was much more… expressive about her anger. But why was it unacceptable when he abandoned her due to being busy when she had done the same thing? When he did it for personal reasons, it was his fault?
No, he thought, unsuccessfully trying to convince himself. She's the guardian, she does so much. Besides, that was a patrol. This was an actual fight- a hard one at that. She needs me.
But I have an excuse too. I just can't tell her.
And then he thought of how quickly the miraculous cure spread across the city.
And she most certainly doesn't need me.
She probably hated him now. He'd ruined his first true friendship, great. But he had no time to sit here and cry about it. He had to get to Ladybug now.
Without even thinking, he pressed the call button. Then he checked the clock on his catphone. It was well after midnight. Would she even be awake? Would she even be transformed? Why would she? Stupid, Adrien. Always leaping without thinking. Now you've upset your best friend and you can't even apologize to her because you don't know who she is!
But she answered on the first ring. "Finally!"
M'lady! He sighed in relief. Then he gulped. M'lady. He'd been so excited to hear her voice that he'd forgotten what he was in for. She sounded livid. "Look, I know what you're about to say, Ladybug-" he started, trying to get ahead of her anger.
"Nevermind, we got through it. That's all that matters, so we're good now."
Chat was startled at this. After all, even he was mad at himself. He should have been there today and he couldn't believe himself. And Ladybug was, again, usually much more emotional and angry than him. He'd been about to comment on how she was right. She would have liked that either way. But she wasn't mad at him? That was a shocker.
"But," Ladybug continued, and he jumped. I'm dead. "We do need to talk. Meet me at the top of the Eiffel, STAT."
His stomach dropped. Even if they weren't dating, no one wanted to here that from the love of their life- or anyone for that matter. Perhaps she was more frustrated than she let on. I am so dead. He was about to ask more questions, but at that she hung up without another word.
I'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdead.
"I get the feeling I'm about to have my whiskers yanked," he said anxiously, out loud to no one in particular, hoping a cat pun would help cheer him up.
It didn't.
I'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdeadI'mdead.
Should I tell her? Luka stood on the opposite side of a sewer wall from Marinette - sorry, Ladybug- so she could detransform and feed her kwami. Luka detransformed and offered Sass some pieces of egg, even though he'd already eaten. He had to be prepared for whatever crazy plan Ladybug had in store for the two of them.
I should tell her.
After all, she was the guardian. He was supposed to come to her for help and she'd figure it out. She always did. She'd know what to do best. But was that too much to ask of a fourteen year-old? He'd never thought of how he'd be putting her in danger by knowing her identity and not telling her.
But his internal debate became louder still as he saw how Ladybug felt about knowing Adrien's- sorry, Chat's - identity. If he told her, would he lose his miraculous? His heart pounded in his chest, and he figured that the way their voices carried through the sewer, Ladybug must have heard it.
No, I shouldn't. Not yet. Not now.
He couldn't afford to stop being Viperion, Viperion who would do anything for Marinette and Adrien. He would literally do anything for them. Besides, he needed Viperion like he needed oxygen. But that was a bit selfish, wasn't it?
Yes, you should.
His lip trembled and his eyes twitched with focus. Ladybug was talking to him; thanking him for being such an awesome partner. But he really wasn't an awesome partner, was he? An awesome partner wouldn't keep secrets, would have told the truth no matter the outcome. Just because he was willing to help her in the middle of the night didn't make him a good person, and he knew that yet did it anyway because he loved her. Adrien too, at least a little bit. Even if neither of them loved him back, he still cared for both of them. He'd do anything for them.
No, you shouldn't. You saw how she reacted to knowing Chat's identity.
Yes, you should. A good partner should be honest.
No, you shouldn't. Marinette needs you.
"Uh, Ladybug," he called, and his voice echoed all around the sewer, much louder and shakier than he intended it to be. He needed to talk, plan, anything to distract him from the whole marinette-is-ladybug-but-adrien-is-chat-and-they-can't-know-each-other's-identities-but-neither-can-i-but-i-do-anyway-oh-and-they-love-each-other-but-i-also-kind-of-really-like-both-of-them thing. Hooray. He calmed his voice a bit. "I want to know… how do you plan to tell Su-Han Chat's identity when you yourself don't know who he is?"
"Do you know why a holder must not know Chat's identity, or mine?" she asked rhetorically. Without quantum masking, her voice was unmistakably Marinette. Her voice screamed, "HEY, I'm MARINETTE." How could he not know? How had he not figured it out before? While she was his literal GIRLFRIEND? Gosh, he was blind.
He answered the question at hand, trying to keep his voice even. "So Shadow Moth leaves us alone when we're not superheroes? If we don't know who you are, we're of no interest to him." Ladybug had told the team this a million times during a speech that the team jokingly called Superhero Rules 101 behind her back. He felt a pang of guilt. Although the question was rhetorical, it felt like a personal attack on his internal monologuing. Obviously, Marinette didn't know that. He swallowed, a lump caught in his throat.
"Exactly! But if needed, a temporary superhero can know my identity, or Chat's, but not both."
This really was a personal attack. Accidentally, of course.
"That way, there would always be one of you to fight Shadow Moth," Luka supplied, trying to hide the anxiety in his voice. He felt another pang of guilt, and this one was sharp. He was putting her- his ex-girlfriend, partner, extremely close buddy at the very least- in danger.
"Yes, you understand," praised Marinette, and that made it worse. He understood the rules, and chose to break them. Chose to lie. For his own personal gain or Marinette's, he wasn't sure. But he was lying, and that was something. "But for Chat in me, it's different. All it would take is for one of us to be akumatized to betray the other."
Or I could betray you both in one fell swoop, he thought darkly. "And Shadow Moth would win," he said out loud.
He should take off that bracelet and hand Sass in right this minute. As long as he was a hero, Shadow Moth would target him and he'd betray his closest friends and… Huh, he didn't entirely know what would happen when Shadow Moth won. Let's just say it would not be good.
"Tikki, spots on!" Marinette, now Ladybug, cried. He hesitated as he listened to her immediately flip open her bugphone, muttering to herself. The sounds of her scrolling through her Bugphone echoed through the sewer. She must have noticed the pause, because she knocked on the sewer wall. "You coming, Luka?"
Not today, he reasoned. Marinette needs me today. He would tell her. Eventually. When he had a good moment. If there ever was a good moment.
"Yeah, I'm coming," he called back. "Sass, scales slither!"
Ladybug explained her plan, and he thought it was rather simple, unlike most of her plans, and rather wise for the… situation. She asked Chat for his identity, he stayed in the sewer. He hears the name, he rewinds time. Ladybug and Chat forget the whole conversation, he doesn't. See? Simple. At least for Marinette- no, Ladybug. He had to stop thinking like Luka, talking to Marinette, and start acting like Viperion, fighting with Ladybug.
But then, he had a sudden thought. How would Marinette- the real Marinette, behind the Ladybug mask- react to knowing that Chat's the love of her life? Like, what if her crazy, stalker-ish tendencies kicked in and she froze and took too long and he detransformed and she was stuck in that timeline where she knew Chat's identity?
"I can ask him myself, if you'd like," Viperion offered, giving voice to his jumbled mess of feelings and thoughts. He needed those out of the way. He couldn't let them get in the way of helping Ladybug. "It will be less dangerous that way."
And less likely that you'll fall in love with Adrien, he thought to himself. Lord knows how she'd react to that one.
"No, I'm the only one Chat will tell."
There it was. Ladybug trusted Chat with her life, and Chat trusted Ladybug with his. He'd follow her to the ends of the world and back. He was the kind of guy Mari deserved, he knew. Not him. He could hear how well their melodies fit together. Like a whole symphony, a whole orchestra. It was beautiful. He knew he could never get them to trust him like that.
At least Luka knew that Ladybug must trust him enough to do this. But now wasn't that
Think like Viperion. Act like Viperion. Whatever you do, stop. Being. Luka.
"I understand," he confirmed, though part of him wished he'd argue the matter further. He already knew Chat's identity, so obviously that was the safest option. But of course, he couldn't tell Ladybug that. "Then I will give his identity to the Celestial Guardian."
"And he'll get off my case," Marinette sighed, and Luka agreed. The guardian's behavior secretly bothered him, though he could never say so. Luka didn't know how he could consider himself a guardian and be so rude to the ones he's meant to guard and train. Seriously, it was really frustrating him at the back of his mind, like an itch he simply could not satisfy. Anyway, now wasn't the time for that.
"Are you sure there will be no problem with me knowing Chat's identity?" The plan was risky and they both knew it. He still wasn't sure how Ladybug would react. One toe out of line and there would be no going back.
"Like I said, as long as I don't know who he is there's no problem."
Right. As long as her obvious love for him doesn't cloud her judgement and she learns his identity and one of them gets akumatized and…
What could go wrong?
A/N: Hey y'all! Remember me? Guess what, I'm not dead. Sorry for not uploading in so long. I just have had to deal with some real life- ugh- for a while! Thanks for your patience and hopefully the next update will come sooner! Also, poor Adrien! He would definitely be along this level of thinking, which isn't fair. Ladybug can be a hypocrite from time to time and the inconsistency annoys me a bit.
Anyway hope you enjoyed this chapter, but if you didn't please keep negative comments to yourself. Remember, Adrienette is ENDGAME. Lukanette, Lukadrien, Lukadrienette ARE NOT. It's just for the spice and drama. If you don't like it, feel free to share your opinion if you must BUT ONLY IN A POSITIVE WAY. Remember to read and review! :)