Annoying Intervention

by Lord Einzbern

Shirou Emiya, the person who arguably got isekaied the most in Type Moon's history. Isekai sounds fun right? Meet new people and get awesome power. An never ending adventure for our Hero of Justice. But what if, instead of just Shirou Emiya, everyone got isekaied. How will the world react if instead of getting hit by a wrench, the world got hit by an entire toolbox.

4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

With a duffle bag slung over his shoulder, Shirou Emiya looks up towards the large overarching gate of the Einzbern castle. Its design is still the same as the first time he sees it decades ago. Knowing that his sister probably already knows that he's here, he sees no further reason to wait further and starts his march towards the main building of the castle with Sigma.

Once inside the outer wall of the castle, Shirou was greeted with a particular sight. In the castle's garden, Shinji was sitting on a bench with a large bowl of Edamame overlooking a lake. And judging from the movement of Shinji's cheek, he is probably chewing one right now.

"Hello Shinji~" said Shirou, placing his hand on Shinji's shoulder. Without saying a world, Shinji look up towards Shirou straight in the eye, then-

Pop….. BOOM!

Shirou suddenly exploded into flames, his skin and clothes were completely burned to a crisp in an instant.

"Is this really necessary?" Shirou asked in a distorted voice as his lungs were both burned and regenerated at the same time.

"I was in contact with the border control at all times. They didn't meet you or Sigma." said Shinji.

"We didn't, we didn't have the time to went through border control, can we can't have them see the weapons," said Shirou.

"You came back from a war zone and you didn't think that you might come back from bringing something with you?! Just because Avanon and your Dead Apostle biology prevented you from getting sick, doesn't mean you can't be a carrier! What do you think will happen if you bring back a bioweapon?'' said Shinji in disgust before he kicked Shirou into the lake.

"Can't you just tell me that first before you decide to cook me alive?" ask Shirou as he pops his head out of the water, flakes of charred skin and fabric floating alongside him.

"Get up here before you contaminate the water with your blood, i don't think Illya would like Vampiric ducks. Is there any skimmer net around here?" ask Shinji as he looks around the lake, looking for the tool shed.

"T-t-t-hat…. won't be necessary. '' said a quiet voice as they saw a Einzbern maid wearing a yellow gardening sun hat peeking her head out from behind a large wheelbarrow filled to the brim with different bags of animal foods

"Oh if it isn't E4-1, aren't you in charge of the bio dome?" said Shinji, staring at the maid curiously.

"Yyyyes I'm a 4th generation environmental m-m-maintenance homunculi, destination E4-1. I'm in charge of the garden, '' answered the maid.

"Ok, E4 do you have something else i can call you by? The name E4-1 seems a bit…"

"Dehumanising?" ask E4-1

"Yes." answer Shirou.

"I-I also go by the name Elfriede." said the now identified Elfriede quietly.

"Nice to meet you then, miss Elfriede." said Shirou, reaching out his charred hand for a handshake. "Good to see you-I mean nice to meet you too." said Elfriede as she quickly took his hand and started shaking it violently. Seeing the bizarre sight of an einzbern maid, shaking the burnt hand of a naked dead apostle, Shinji only had one thing on his mind.

click.

"What?" asked Shirou as Elfriede quickly hid behind her wheelbarrow and turned to face a grinning Shinji pointing the camera of a phone towards them.

"Annnnnddddd send." smirk Shinji as she presses down on the send button.

"Shinji? What was that?" ask Shirou.

"This is for the head injury," said Shinji, with a smirk

"How many times do I have to tell you, I wasn't the one who sealed your head inside of the basketball" Yelled Shirou.

"But you did help, didn't you? How else would Rin be able to get her hand of Gáe Buidhe?" ask Shinji, still with his smirk on.

"She just came to me and said that she needs something that can stop a dead apostle from regenerating." said Shirou.

"You know that there are only 2 dead apostles who live in this city right?" ask Shinji while smiling, but Shirou knows that that smile is anything but kind. But shirou isn't a type of person who would be deterred by such trivial things such as social cues.

"Yea?" answer Shirou, answering Shinji's smile with a smile of his own.

"Then why did you give it to her!" Ask Shinji, shaking him by the shoulder while accidentally ripping off a chuck of Shirou's dead charred skin, revealing strands of steel that have long since replaced his muscle when he discovers that can manipulate and reinforce tiny fibre-like swords with far higher efficiency than his own muscles.

"Oh…." said Shinji as he stared at the 2 sheets of skins that he had just ripped off.

"Don't worry it'll grow back in a few seconds. '' said Shirou as pink patches of skin were already replacing removed skin at rapid paced.

"Ughh." said Shinji in disgust as he dumped Shirou's skin onto the ground along with the slowly growing piles of charged flakes of skin.

"Come, Shirou, I'm going to get you cleaned up, and you." said Shinji, staring Elfriede straight in the eye.

"Sorry for the inconvenience. I was busy yesterday, so here's your gift I was planning to give to the ones who maintain the bio-dome" said Shinji before handing Elfriede a black case that was next to his bench the entire time he was there.

"Uhhh…. What is this?" ask Elfriede as she fiddles at the black case on her hand in confusion.

"That's some tool I got for gardening." said Shinji before suddenly rushing to Shirou and pushing him away.

"Shinji, were you trying to bride her?" whispers Shirou as he was being pushed away by Shinji.

"Yes, Sigma, get over here. We're going to get you quarteened unless you also want to get a napalm shower as well." answered Shinji before he pushed Shirou and dragged Sigma through the side door of the main castle before slamming the door behind shut with a loud bang.

-Line-Break-

Inside the ballroom of the Einzbern castle, everything was an orderly storm. A small army of maids and butlers was rushing back and forth carrying stuff ranging from utensils boxes to a giant dining table. And in the centre of the storm is a single maid commanding them all.

"H4-21 to 25, head to the dining room! A3-81 will give you instructions once you arrive!" order the maid.

"Jawohl!" said the 5 homunculus in unison rushing towards the dining room.

"B4-5, are you done hanging the banner?" ask the maid

"Yes, the banners have been hung according to your specification." said B4-5 as the maid checked a box off of a ridiculously long checklist.

"Umm~ everything seems to be in order, do a final check before informing Lady Emiya that the kitchen is ready for her."

"It shall be one." replied B4-5 before taking the note and heading back to the kitchen.

"And Speltz, stop eating and do something!" screams the maid before she shrew a bolt of purple mana towards a albino child in a Einzbern butler uniform. who was chomping on a hand-held apple pie. With a flick of his wrist a green fireball appeared out of thin air to intercept the mana bolt mid air.

"I am working, Astria. I'm taste testing." said Speltz in a dull tone before taking another bite at the apple pie.

"It's not taste testing if you're eating the same thing for the 15th time in a row!" scream Astria in an irritated tone. As she threw another mana bolt that the boy lodged without effort. Suddenly she realised something, most if not all of the homunculus in the room glistened slightly in the corner of their mouths. They're drooling.

Ah~ So that's what it is hun? I can work with this.

"Speltz, after eating so much food you must be very full. How about you go do some work? I'm sure there are people willing to take this job for you~ Anyone who wishes to help with the taste test?" ask Astria. right after hearing her words, everyone in the room raised their hands simultaneously.

This much? Oh right, because of work, we completely skipped lunch today, gotta keep up with the schedule.

"It seems that there is more than I expected." Muse Astria. Silently she pressed her finger into a thin collar like headset and started speaking into it.

"Herr Matou, I have approximately 40 starving homunculus that need to be fed. Can you handle it?" Ask Astria.

"40 homunculus? That's a lot of mouth to feed…. Well, I do have a bunch of spare bio-rods leftover… Are the homunculus interested in some mashed potato? I just got my hand on Joël Robuchon's mashed potato's molecular makeup quite recently. I have been wanting to try them out for quite a long time." said Shinji.

"I have no idea what you just said, but as long as it's not one of your spherification experiments, they should be fine with it." said Astria.

"Alright then. I'll start making the potato then.'' said Shinji before the audio was overtaken by the light buzzing of an electric motor.

"All right, I have good news. Anyone who has finished their current task may head to the mess hall for a meal." announce Astria before she decides that it's time to inform Sella that it's time to wake their oversleeping creator up.

-Line-Break-

In stark contrast to the chaos of the castle, the inside of the room was completely quiet with the sole exception of soft snoring coming from beneath the light orange bedsheet. The bounded field of the room was made to prevent any outside noises, with the door acting as the only way to receive contact from the outside world when the barrier was up.

Knock knock knock…

"What?" whispers Illya, annoyed by the sound of knocking that instead of coming from the door, was sent through the bounded field, sent straight into her brain like a jackhammer.

Knock knock knock…

"Shut up!" screams Illya, releasing a burst of mana in rage. The mana rush out in a dome completely overloading all mystic codes with mana in the vicinity, including the gem that acts as the anchor of the bounded field, shattering it into pieces of shards that fell onto the floor.

"Sigh~ You broke it again?" ask Sella upon entering the room and seeing the shattered shard of the anchor gem on the floor.

"Yes, I did. Can't you find another barrier mystic code? I swear, one day, my brain will be destroyed by one of these things." said Illya while massaging the bridge of her nose.

"This is the best barrier mystic code we can get our hands on. Upon hearing of the destruction of their mystic codes, the Icecolle family happily sent several copies of the same mystic codes as compensation." said Sella.

"The Icecolle family!? What makes you think that dealing with them was a good idea?!" ask Illya in shock.

"Tests have proved that their barrier mystic codes are the best on the Clocktower market. There are ways to get better barrier mystic codes, but it would require an exchange of favours." said Sella.

"We're not even sure if this mystic code was made for protection! For all we know, this mystic code could be a torturing device. It certainly feels like one too." said Illya while picking her ears, making sure that her ear wasn't bleeding again.

"Well nevermind that, you got more important things to attend to. It's time to wake Lady Emilya up." said Sella.

"Wait, already? I guess the healing runes worked better than I expected. Are there any symptoms of muscular atrophy like what Shinji said?" ask Illya.

"No, Lady Emily's caretaker there were no sign of muscular atrophy." said Sella

"Hun, I guess he's wrong then. But, better do a physical test just in case, where's Shinji? Are you still keeping him occupied?" ask Illya.

"Yes, Shinji is currently providing food for the homunculus. Apparently he's making some sort of mash potato." said Sella.

"Oh good, I'm starving, get me one of those." said Illya.

"I'm afraid not. As the host, it is your duty to finish the final touch of the decoration." said Sella.

"I didn't ask to be the host," said Illya.

"You did not, but as there are no other suitable locations, so naturally the duty falls onto you." said Sella in a calm tone.

"Shirou was originally going to be the host. '' said Illya.

"He was, that is until his house was trashed by the Tohsaka head." said Sella.

"Ughhhhh…. Fine, I'll go. But you better get me something to eat once I'm done. And something to drink too.

With an annoyed grunt, Illya pushed herself out of the bed and dragged herself out of the door. Slowly, Illya eventually made her way to the main ballroom and was met with a particular sight.

The 2 sides of the ballroom each contained 3 marble pedestals of varying sizes containing words carved to the side. On top of each pedestal contain weapons that were stabbed into the stone. Upon seeing the weapons stabbed into the pedestal, Causing Illya's already naturally pale complexion to pale even further.

Each weapon ranges wildly from each other from dagger to spear that is even taller then he is, but can all be considered to be a powerful weapon in their own right. The pedestals on the left side contain a decorated sword shining in a soft golden glow, a blood red spear radiating blood lust and a dual blade of black and white. The pedestals on the right side contains a large steel nail attached to a long chain, a odachi with a purple hilt and gold linings, and a decorated dagger with a jagged blade.

"Why are there Noble Phantasms on these pedestals?" ask Illya while staring at the weapons with a pair of wide eyes.

"According to the administration homunculus, these are meant to honour the heroic spirits that have fought in the war. '' said sella as if she was reading off of a script.

"Ok, but WHY Noble Phantasms? We are practically asking to be robbed here!" said Illya.

"You have Hercules's Axe-Sword mounted outside in a giant marble mausoleum, you don't get to talk." said Sella

"Berserker's Sword is not a noble phantasm. Plus, I highly doubt anything short of an assassin class servant can get past the detectors undetected when I have 4 4th generation homunculus stationed around it at all times. So good luck even getting close to the mausoleum. The only 2 weapons here that don't count as Noble Phantasms would be the odachi and that oversized nail. Where did you even get these weapons from anyway? I'm sure that I locked the vault last week." said Illya.

"Oh, these aren't from your vault. Shirou Emiya provided them for us, the runes carved inside of the pillar will constantly provide the weapons with mana to maintain its existence." said Sella.

"Wait, so you're telling me that Shirou just traced you Noble Phantasms without asking?" ask Illya.

"No, we asked him to give us Noble Phantasms for decorations, THEN he gave it to us," said Sella.

" and then he gave it to you. "repeats Illya with an expression that can be best described as exasperated.

"Sigh~ What was I expecting from him? My brother's sense of value is so skewed that he might as well be operating on a completely different set of logic. Seriously, who in their right mind would think that Noble Phantasms would be good decorations?" ask Illya.

"Gil-"

"DON'T answer that!" said Illya, sending Sella a sideways glare.

"Sigh~ Let's just get this over with, what is the thing you want me to do?" ask Illya.

"You shall be the one putting the final touch. '' said Sella, gesturing at the 2 homunculus carrying something that was covered by a sheet of red silk. Without saying another word, Sella walks up to the sheet of silk and takes it off with flourish to reveal what's hidden beneath.

Hidden behind the covering was a large golden chalice with intricate carving carved to the side. The chalice looks like a much larger version of Rin's favourite Ginger ale cup. But other than that, the chalice also excludes a familiar magical signature that Illya would never forget. A magical signature that Illya wishes to never feel again. The feeling of an ancient and powerful curse. A curse that while providing its owner with great wealth also curses its owner with great misfortune. A curse which was quite literally carved into her heart when she underwent the countless painful, agonising surgery that made her into a vessel for the grail war. The curse of the lesser grail.

Instantly a massive surge of mana radiates out of Ilya in waves. Her breathing starts speeding up despite her attempt to slow them down.

"Destroy it" ordered Illya as a ball of mana dense enough to rival the destructive ability of a rank A+ spell formed in her palm. Her sudden act of violence causes everyone around her to back away, with their hand out to create a defence spell at a moment's notice.

"Why? It's not haunted or anything." said Sella before being interrupted by Illya.

"It's cursed, an abomination that causes nothing but suffering to those around it." whispers Illya as she raises her hand into the sky and forms the ball into a spinning spear of mana ready to turn the grail replica in front of her into a heap of molten gold.

"Now now, there's no need for that. The alchemists worked really hard on that, there's no need to destroy their hard work." said Sella as she tries to dissuade Illya from blowing out a chunk of the castle.

"Yea that's right… there's no need to worry. The grail is no more, we destroyed it. We incinerated the greater grail with a broken excalibur." whispers Illya quietly as she finally gets her breathing under control. With a quick wave of her hand, she dismisses the mana spear and turns towards Sella.

"Remove this thing from my sight before I return" says Illya with an aggressive glare towards the chalice before walking away from the lobby towards the castle's servant cafeteria.

"Jawohl."

-Line-Break-

"Here you go. This is your 19th serving by the way. Maybe you should take a break." Smiles Shinji as he hands the maid another bowl of mash potato.

"No." said the maid in monotone, though Shinji could swear that he could see a small smirk on the maids face.

"Of course you would." said Shinji, still with the same smile on his face, though the bulging vein on his forehead would indicate otherwise.

"Alright, I'm going to make another batch, does anyone else want more?" ask Shinji, and in an instant everyone's hand rose up.

"Sigh~ Oi, Hans! Do we have any bio-rod left?" ask Shinji to Hans, a colossal lumbering man with ripping muscles who reached over 2.5 metre in height who was also wearing a giant light green apron around his waist.

(...) Hans said nothing as he shakes his head in a matter that seems to be saying 'No'.

"Already? I know that 4th generation homunculi have an increased metabolism but these people just ate enough food to feed a small army for a week. Where are they even storing this? Did Illya somehow make their stomach into a blackhole or something?" ask Shinji as he tried and failed to remove food stains off his lab coat.

(...) As if to respond to his question, Hans pointed towards a certain group of homunculi sitting off to the side of the cafeteria eating their foods ferociously next to a slowly glowing pile of plates.

"Sigh~ of course is the C model that's eating most of the food. Why didn't Illya refill their reserve? They're eating all of the foods to refuel their mana supply. Hans, I'm going to get a few more crates bio-rods from my truck, there should still be around a few dozen of crates back there. And also some mana prisms from the generator, I think it's time to spice things up a little." said Shinji, a tiny smirk appearing on his face.

-Line-Break-

With a wet towel around his neck, Shirou Emiya walks out of the castle's hot spring changing room to the main lobby of the castle as instructed by Shinji to be met with a familiar purple mop of hair of his beloved wife from the distant.

"Sakura!" Beams Shirou, his steps speeding up.

"Shirou!" replied Sakura with a wide smile on her face. Without warning, Sakura dashed forward towards Shirou, and jumped into his embrace. Within each other's embrace, they shared a kiss they have been waiting for for over 3 years.

Click…

Instantly, Sakura broke the kiss to turn around towards the direction of the sound. In a moment, Sakura realised that she was staring down the barrel of a camera. Slowly in realisation, Sakura's face reddened until her face was the same colour as Shirou's hair.

"Congratulations on your return, Lord Emiya." smiles Sella while holding a camera.

"How many times should I tell you, you don't need to call me Lord Emiya. Just call me Shirou." said Shirou with a small chuckle.

"Nonsense, you're the head of the Emiya Family. It's not respectful to address you in any other way." said Sella.

"Then why did you address Shinji as a Herr and not a lord? Shinji is also the head of a matou family, is he not?" ask Shirou.

"Herr Matou is incapable of being a magus, and the only magus left in the matou family now bears the Emiya name. So in the eyes of the association, the Matou family might as well be extinct." said Sella.

"Ouch." said Shirou.

"But Herr Matou doesn't care about that much though, he has always shown a distaste towards the Mage Association for their opposing ideals.

"Eh, that's what happens when the mages deemed his innovations so much of a threat that they'll send assassins after him. '' said Shirou.

"To be fair, he did reduce the effectiveness of healing spells by 90%, so the association does have a reason to be displeased." said Sella.

"Hey, as shinji has always said 'you can't stop innovation'." said Shirou.

"Speaking of innovation, I believe it's time to show you two something." said Sella in a purposely mysterious tone before she started walking towards a previously restricted area.

Inside of the area, is a large wooden double gate that is identical to all other gates in the castle other than the dark seal that is carved onto the front of the door.

"What is it?" ask Sakura, holding onto the wooden walking cane that was given to her after she woke up to help her walk when she isn't using her wheelchair.

"You see, after receiving the news of your return, Illyasviel and Herr Matou decided that they should help you with something. You see, your cooking, while good, is still limited by your ingredients. As such those two have taken upon themselves to provide to you the best material to work with." smiles Sella with pride as she puts both of her hands onto the magic seal on the door. The seal glowed for a moment before it shattered like glass.

"Welcome to the ultimate kitchen!" declares Sella, swinging both of her hands wide open. Inside the door contains probably one of the strangest kitchens Shirou have ever seen outside of the clocktower. The centre of the room seems to be separated into two distinct parts. On one side there seems to be a kitchen that's taken right from a magus's workshop. Shelves upon shelves of magical tools and glass jars stand next to a large wooden workbench that is covered with magic circles and runes. The other side contains a state of the art kitchen with everything being cleaned and sterilised, lights dance across the black digital surface of the table that was designed as convenient to the user as possible.

"Wow…." mutter Sakura as she stares at the rows upon rows of kitchen utensils that were arranged on to a glass shelf.

"Don't get too excited, we haven't even shown the main attraction yet." said Sella as they all turned their attention towards a door at the opposite end of the entrance.

"We saw the kitchen, what other thing is there?" ask Shirou.

"Yes, you saw the kitchen. But you can't exactly cook a dish without any ingredients can you?" ask Sella as she pushes open the metal door to reveal a freezer room that's more elaborate freezer should be. A large wave of mana pushes its way out of the freezer door like mists coming out of an oven.

"What?" asks Sakura, staring at the thin glowing layer of cyan mist that flows steadily out of the freezer. What kind of freezer has the same level of mana density as Albion's tomb?

"This is an experimental bounded field that was created using the Emiya crest. It can slow down time so much that the passage time might as well be frozen from our perspective. It can allow us to store ingredients for an indefinite period of time as long as the bounded field is operational. The mana that needed to manipulate time to such a degree is also immensely large, we need to have servants come here regularly to clean out the mana crystals that occasionally form from the air." said Sella as she picked 2 pendant out of a glass case and handed them to Shirou and Sakura.

"Put these on. While the level of mana inside the freezer won't kill you, mana oversaturation is still an unpleasant thing to go through."said Sella as she pass through the freezer's door

"Here you can find every single culinary ingredient available on this texture of reality and more, as long as it's something permitted by the world to exist, you can find it here. We even have a few things that are not of this age. We have a jug of Dionysus's wine and other more valuable artefacts down at the vault, if you wish to use it, don't be afraid to ask." said Sella.

"Oh. umm… No thank you, I think there's already more variety of alcohol here than most wine cellars in the world. There's no need to bring out a divine construct from the Age of Gods. I think we can work with these just fine." said Shirou.

"Very well then, I shall leave you two to it. If you need any assistance then don't be afraid to ask.

"Thank you." said Sakura while making a small bow towards Sella as she left the kitchen.

"So, want to get started?" ask Shirou, already holding a small crate of beef.

"I thought you'd never ask." said Sakura, taking a boning knife off of the shelf.

-Line-Break-

"Oh brother~ Not even a day and you already hooked up with someone? Oh my! What would your students think~ The GREAT Lord El-Melloi II seducing this fair maiden for his carnal desire~ Truly the pinnacle example of a great educator…." rant Reines as she dances around a groaning Lord El-Melloi II with a sadistic smirk on her face.

"I'm so sorry that you have to see this." said a young woman with grey hair as she apologised to Taiga.

"ummm.. is this normal?" ask Taiga, confused by the aggressive teasing Reines has just deployed.

"Yes, this happens, All the fucking time!" hiss Lord El-Melloi II, ashamed that his new friend was forced to witness his sister's infamous verbal assault.

"Oh~ did I hit a nerve?" ask Reines, purposely putting her face uncomfortably close to Lord El-Melloi II's face.

"I won't tell you jack shit! Last time you found one, you played it like a guitar string!" said Lord El-Melloi II before he turned his eyes towards the grey-haired teenager.

"Grey, please take care of our luggage." said Lord El-Melloi II

"Of course sir, have you found the location of the reunion yet?" ask Grey.

"Well, yes actually. Taiga Fujimura has provided us with her phone." said Lord El-Melloi II

"..."

"What?"

"Sir? Can you explain to us how we can know where the location of the reunion is?" ask Grey, raising her hand as if she is asking her teacher a question.

"Excellence question, this is just some simple logical deductions. You see we don't know the exact location of the reunion, but we do know about its participants and its environment appearance. Now, Miss Fujimura's phone has Shirou Emiya's phone registered as a family member. You do know what that means?" ask Lord El-Melloi II.

"We should run away to avoid getting turned into a human pin cushion?" ask Grey, alerted by the name of Shirou Emiya

"That is a good answer but that's not what I'm asking for." said Lord El-Melloi II.

"The Find My Friends app?" ask Taiga while raising her hand up into the air.

"Correct, by using the Find My Friends app on the phone we are able to locate the location of the reunion. And by overlaying the Find My Friends app with this map of Fuyuki, we are able to identify the location of the reunion right here." said Lord El-Melloi II, pointing towards the middle of a forest using a pointer stick.

"Umm. sir? That's just a bunch of trees." said Grey while looking at the sheet of greens that covers that section of the map.

"Grey, do you remember the first rule of workshop building?" ask Lord El-Melloi II.

"Never let your workshop be… Oh." said Grey, her eyes widening upon her realisation.

"Exactly, to put one's workshop in the public's view undisguised is foolishness to the highest degree. And when you look at the outline of this area, this patch of trees is clearly fake and is meant to hide something, perhaps a workshop. And judging by the location, it's likely the Einzbern's workshop in Fuyuki." said Lord El-Melloi II as he put his hand onto the tip of the pointer stick and collapsed it back into the pen size stick and put it back inside his robe.

"Ok, so what now? That place is about 1 hour away from Miyama Town by car. If we need to get there before night falls, we need to go now." said Taiga upon seeing the road that leads to the forest.

"Well then, I suppose we would hurry then. Trimmau, car mode." said Lord El-Melloi II. Upon hearing the command, the silver maid dissolved itself into a puddle of mercury before the mercury floated up to form a Sedan car made of mercury.

"Come with me if you want to live." said the car in a deep yet feminine voice as all of the doors of the car opened simultaneously.

"What? Did that maid just…."

"Yes, she turned into a car. Come on, we don't have much time to waste." said Lord El-Melloi II as Grey started to toss their luggage into the trunk of the car.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Get in, afraid of entering a stranger's car? Don't worry, I don't bite~" said Reines as she patted her gloved hand down next to the silver seat next to him. The surface of the chair makes small ripples as Reines pats the seat.

"Umm, is it safe?" ask Taiga as she stares at the car suspiciously.

"While it is composed mainly of mercury, it's made in a way so that it's safe to a human as long as you don't try to drink it." said Lord El-Melloi II as Grey finished loading the luggage and sat onto the shotgun seat next to him.

"Umm… All alright." said Taiga as she entered the car and sat down on the car seat next to Reines.

"Trimmau, please take us to the Einzbern's workshop." said Lord El-Melloi II.

"Order received." said the car as all of the doors of the car slammed shut simultaneously, and the car launched itself out of the park and made an immediate beeline towards the Einzbern castle.

-Line-Break-

One hour later…..

"Umm….. When you say that we're going for a shortcut, this is not what I was expecting." said Taiga as the silver car was driving up a vertical cliff at full speed without any issue.

"Don't worry, with this plotted route, we should be able to reach the Einzbern workshop in 30 minutes." said Lord El-Melloi II.

"You're a mage right? Can't you just fly there?" ask Taiga.

"Yes, but last time someone tried flying their way into the castle during the fourth grail war they were met with SAM missiles chasing them, so unless you're riding the Gordius Wheel or else you're going to be shot down.

"The Gordius Wheel, what's that?" ask Taiga.

"Iskandar's noble phantasm." said Grey, providing information so that her teacher won't have to answer them.

"Oh, I understand none of it." said Taiga with a laugh.

"Be prepared to get used to that feeling," said Lord El-Melloi II.

"Hold tight, we're about to enter the Einzbern territory." said Lord El-Melloi II, as he reinforced his body.

"Wait, what do you meeEAAAANNNN!" screams Taiga as the car drove up the clift and into the vast forest that stood upon it.

"Be careful, this place is so fortified that it makes the North Korean DMZ look like a box fort. '' said Lord El-Melloi II as the car swivelled and swerved in seemingly random directions.

"What? I don't see any-" BAAAAAA! "Oh, nevermind" said Taiga as the car swerved around just barely dodging a pillar of red beam that suddenly came out of the ground.

As the car drove forward, Taiga realised that the frequency of the car's manoeuvring around seemingly invisible traps increased exponentially. And by now, the car was practically swinging from tree to tree with what seems to be grappling hooks that's being shot out of the 'car's' bumper.

"Analysing Traps positioning complete. Conclusion: Direct travel to the destination will result in a 99.92% chance of destruction. Reploting route…" said the car as it suddenly stopped while still having a grappling hook hooked up to a tree, causing the front car to hang slightly off of the ground.

"Reploting completed, commenting travel in 3. 2. 1." said the car as it shot out a grappling hook towards another tree and a hood shot out from the back hooking itself onto the ground. Right after that, the 2 hooks at the front of the car start to reel themselves in without unhooking themselves from the tree. Suddenly the back of Taiga's head slammed to the back of the seat as the car slingshot itself up into the tree using the 2 trees as its frames.

In the sky, Taiga looked out of the window to see that like Rin said, there's indeed a castle in the middle of the forest. When Rin said Illya's castle she didn't think that she meant a literal castle, or at least that's what she'll say if they weren't swarms of what looks to be missiles coming flying out of the castle towards them.

"There's missiles!" scream Taiga in fear

"Missiles? It seems that they removed the SAM missiles. Good to know…" mutters Lord El-Melloi II as he glanced towards the window.

"Missiles incoming!" scream Taiga in fear as swarms of missiles flew ever closer to them.

"Oh, those? Those aren't missiles. Those are just familiar swarms that are made to chase their target and explode on impact. They became quite popular when the Einzberns introduced them in a clocktower duel. Trimmau, please initiate the aerial evasion protocol. '' said Lord El-Melloi II, casually rolling down the car window to puff out a mouthful of smoke outside. Multiple flares like glowing rocks were ejected out of the back of the truck, redirecting the trajectory of the familiar away from the fleeing car.

"More incoming!" said Taiga as multiple streams of light blue light blast themselves towards the side of the car, launching the car out of the sky and into the forest below.

"This may be problematic." said Lord El-Melloi II before his face was slammed into the mercury windshield of the car.

-Line-Break-

"They survived that?" ask a surprised Shinji as he chomped into the Bio-rod like it's a candy bar.

"Apparently yes, they were shot down in section G-31 of the forest. I should probably send a patrol of C-models to an area along with a flock of Stork Knights to the area for clean up." said Illya while staring into a crystal ball.

"This is surprising, not many things both technological and magical can survive a barrage from a group of Käser turret." said Shinji, scrolling to the stats for the Käser CIWS, a magical anti-aircraft gun capable of firing 5,000 round of high powered mana bolt per minutes. Against most mages, any defences they might as brought would have been shredded apart the moment they enters the firing range of a Käser, the only thing they knew that can completely survive the onslaught of 20 Käser at the same time without a scratch is Rho Aias, and that thing is a conceptually made anti-projectiles noble phantasm.

"Have you seen the movement of that car thing when it moved around? It's so smooth it's almost-" said Illya before being interrupted by Shinji

"Like it's made of fluid. Some kind of nano machine?" ask Shinji.

"Unlikely, whatever that thing is, it's highly magical in nature, I highly doubt that a mage would have the know-how to operate technology of that calibre. From its colour it's probably mercury and there's only one family I know capable of manipulating mercury to such an advanced degree." said Illya.

"Who?" ask Shinji.

"The El-Melloi family," said Illya.

"Lord El-Melloi II's family? How strange, doesn't he teach modern magecraft theory? Why would he be using that brand of magecraft?" ask Shinji.

"From reading one of my father's files I discovered that in the Fourth Holy Grail War, lancer's master used a mystic code that's described to be liquid mercury capable of moving around in command of the user. Sound familiar?" ask Illya.

"I see, so what took the guy down? Servants?" ask Shinji.

"No, a bullet. The former lord of the Clocktower was taken down by a single bullet, quite amusing now that you think about it." said Illya before taking a single bullet out of her pocket and put it onto the table, next to the crystal ball.

"I assume this is no ordinary bullet," said Shinji, picking up the bullet by the shell to inspect it.

"And your assumptions are correct. This is not just any bullet. This is an origin bullet, the ultimate anti-mage weapon. The tip of the bullet was made to pierce through most defences while the bullet is able to disconnect and reconnect every single magic circuit in a person's body. While normally, being shot by it will simply render you magically crippled. Being shot while a mage is pushing their magic circuit to its limit, well….. It's not going to be pretty." said Illya, cringing at the thought of the mage being fried by their own mana from inside out.

"Ouch.." said Shinji, wincing at the description.

"Then you can understand why I didn't tell you this until now. We only have 26 of them." said Illya

"Oh, ok. That makes sense. Wait…. Umm, Illya, I think there might be a problem." said Shinji, pointing towards the crash site of the magical supercar in the crystal ball.

"Taiga?! What's she doing there?" ask Illya as she slammed her fist onto the table.

"I don't know but we should probably secure her first for her safety?" said Shinji urgently before pressing his finger onto an intercom button on his tablet.

"This is Shinji Matou to all Patrolling C-models. Can you hear me?" ask Shinji.

"This is C4-8, I can hear you clearly." said a female voice from the other side of the tablet.

"Good, how close are you to section G-31 of the forest?" ask Shinji.

"I'm approximately 2 minutes away from section G-31." said C4-8

"Allright, i need to go to section G-31 and informed everyone there that Taiga Fujimura is not to be harmed." said Shinji,

"Who is Taiga Fujimura?" ask C4-8.

"Taiga Fujimura is Shirou Emiya's surrogate older sister. Her most identical traits would be her wearing or holding anything striped in yellow and black." said Shinji.

"Order confirmed," said C4-8.

"Hey! Why did you do that?!" ask Illya.

"I did that to prevent us from turning into noble phantasm pincushions. How do you think Shirou would feel if we accidentally killed Taiga?" ask Shinji

"He'll probably forgive us after a while." said Illya

"And Sakura?" ask Shinji.

"Ok, sparing Taiga was a good idea." said Illya right after she felt a chill going up her spine.

"You don't say….."

-Line-Break-

Dashing from the shade of a tree to another, Taiga Fujimura hid from the army of enthreal birds that patrols the sky above her. For over 10 minutes Taiga has managed to hide herself from the small army of Illya clones by hiding behind tree trunks that populate the forest. When they crashed into the forest, Taiga managed to sneak away before a group of cosplayers in white came to the crash site and took Lord El-Melloi II and his companion away, and now they were apparently looking for her.

"No sight of Taiga Fujimura in this sector, are you sure that she hasn't gone somewhere else?" ask the granny to what seems to be the leader of the entire operation.

"An unaugmented human has the maximum possible speed of 45km/hr, as such it is physically impossible for her to run beyond 2 sectors in this amount of time," said Granny.

" If that's true then shouldn't we be focusing our forces in that sector instead of here?" ask the Illya clone, raising one her hand up in the air while the other hand reached out to allow a large ethereal eagle to perch on it.

"She is only able to get that far if she is running in a straight line this entire time, which she clearly didn't. That means that she's likely around this arena, hiding here." said the leader as she took her cane and pointed it towards the tree Taiga was hiding behind.

"That's a tree." said the Illya clone.

"Sigh~ Behind the tree," said the leader.

"There's no one behind the tree," said the Illya clone.

"That's because you let her get away. Children, you have centuries of information transcribed into your brain, learn to use it sometime." said the granny.

shuffle, shuffle, shuffle…

Suddenly everyone's gaze turned towards the shuffling sound coming from a tree a small distance away from the tree Taiga was originally hiding in.

"..."

"Well?" asks the granny, lightly gesturing her hand towards the tree.

"Oh right, sorry. '' said the Illya clone holding a man catcher before she dashed forwards towards the tree and readyed her man catcher before thrusting it where Taiga used it be.

"Shit!" hiss Taiga as she dashed further into the forest after she almost got pushed to the ground. Suddenly, she dashed behind a tree just in time to escape from a barrage of white blobs that seemed to expand upon hitting the ground.

"She's over there!" came a voice from behind before Taiga instinctively crouched down to avoid a thrust from the man catcher that pinned her to the ground

"Oh shit!" hiss Taiga before dashing away using all of her strength.

"Get her!"

"Where is she?"

"She's over there!"

"We have orders to take her-... They're gone. Of course they're gone." said granny while massaging the bridge or her nose. Without saying another word, she pressed her finger to her ear and said "Illyasviel, can you hear me?".

"Oh! It's Oma Adela, I can hear you. What happened?" ask the voice of Illya

"We found Taiga Fujimura. She is currently fleeing towards sector G-32 and there are currently 3 C-models chasing her. I can't guarantee her safety.'' said Adela while gazing towards the direction where Taiga has run towards.

"Can you take care of it?" ask Illya.

"Of course. Doing so would be trivial for me." said Adela as she stabbed her cane onto the ground. The ground beneath her bubbles as they turn into a semi solid state. Then with a tap of her cane, the ground beneath her rushed forward carrying Adela towards the fleeing Taiga Fujimura.

-Line-Break-

"What!" scream Taiga as she suddenly sank into the ground. Her feet sank into the pit of mud that suddenly appeared beneath where she was standing.

"Checkmate." whispers a albino girl with a grin on her face as a massive blob of white was shot out of the beak of the Stork-Knight heating Towards Taiga's chest.

"Oh shit-"

Splat!

"Eh? " whispers Taiga as a blob of white sticky, foamy substance hits Taiga straight in the chest before slowly expanding to cover her entire body below her neck, leaving her unable to move.

Suddenly, the albino girl from before came rushing out of the treeline with her mancatcher running forward towards Taiga. The runes lining the shaft of the mancatcher glowed in blue as she thrush the man catcher forward, the shaft of the mancatcher extending forward like a party horn towards Taiga's

"STOP!"

Thud!

Instead of the sound of metal through flesh, what appeared was the sound of a metal hitting earth. A pillar of soil appeared from the ground stopping the man catcher by the curved prong.

"We have explicit orders to take her alive. What you just did was the use of excessive force, excessive force that would take Miss Taiga's head off" ask the granny Taiga has seen earlier, her time seems to imply that she is disappointed at the albino girl.

"I don't see how that's a problem. Cutting her head off would prevent her from running away." said the Illya clone while shouldering her mancatcher.

"And what about the rest of her body?" ask the granny.

"We can just reattach her body later." said the Illya clone, slowly inching her mancatcher towards Taiga.

"I'm sure that's not what the order means when it said to take her alive," said Granny.

"But what if she runs away again?" ask the Illya clone.

"We're hours away from any other human settlement. Where could she run to?" ask the Granny.

"It would still take a very long time to find her," said the Illya clone.

"Then I trust you to keep her in check. '' said granny before lightly tapping the ground with her cane.

"Can't we at least paralysed her from the waist down?" ask the Illya clone, lightly jabbing the tip of her mancatcher right above Taiga's lumbar spine.

"Will you carry her around until you can find someone willing to fix her for you?" ask Granny as she stared at the Illya clone with a tired expression.

"You know healing spells, you can heal her for us. '' said the Illya clone before getting interrupted by the granny.

"No no no, I won't be doing that for you. YOU tried to disobey orders, I won't be cleaning up your mess." said granny.

"Yea, let's not paralyse me from the waist down." said Taiga, adding to Granny's argument.

"Come on! It will only hurt a little bit." said the Illya clone before a albino girl with the bird spirit thing came to add to their conversation.

"No, It'll hurt a lot. Not everyone has the same pain tolerance as you, Gertrude." said the girl with the magical birdie before the bird transformed into a giant hand made of wires that plucked Taiga from the ground.

"What?! What are you doing?!" Yell Taiga as the giant hand dangled her from the air.

"I'm preventing you from getting pricked in the spine."said the girl before attaching a strand of wire to the giant hand like tying a string to a floating balloon.

"We secured the target…. Yes, she is unharmed… Very well, we shall be sending her to you right now." said the granny before turning to their group.

"You." the granny said, pointing towards the girl holding the Taiga balloon. "Use your familiar to send her to the castle. We completed our objective, we're taking the sand road back." said the granny.

"Affirmative." said the girl as the giant hand holding Taiga floated up into the air and then transformed into a large eagle with Taiga contained inside and blasted off towards the Einzbern castle in the distance. Her sound of screaming fades away as the plane flies away from her.

-Line-Break-

Sitting in an armchair on the roof with a digital tablet in hand, Shinji looked up from his tablet to see his former Teacher screaming in fear as a giant eagle made out of ethereal strings landed in front of him. After a few seconds, the chest of the eagle opened itself up,dropping a frazzled Taiga onto the ground. The foam ball around her body softened her landing before dissolving.

"Oh sweet ground! Oh sweet sweet ground! I miss you so much!" cries Taiga as she repeatedly kisses the stone tile she had landed on.

"Are you done?" ask Shinji, staring at her with a bored expression.

"Wait." said Taiga before giving the stone tile one final kiss. "Ok, I'm done."

"Finally! You've been kissing the ground for over 17 seconds! Do you know how unsanitary that is? I was starting to think that I'm going to have to find something to uninstall the floor and take it with you. Wait… no, I don't literally need someone to uninstall the floor for me, that was an exaggeration" said Shinji as he stood up waved the homunculi maid holding a red tool box away.

"Sigh~ this is what I get for lending Illya Amelia Bedelia to read." whispers Shinji under his breath.

"You know Taiga, you're not supposed to be here. According to mage law we would have to kill you or at least wipe your memories of the event. But apparently, Lord El-Melloi II somehow thinks that you're a mage. How do you get a Lord of the Clocktower to vouch you? I don't even know." mutters Shinji in a strange form of admiration before putting his tablet shrinks into the size of a phone and he puts it in his pocket.

"So, what are you doing here? Because I highly doubt that you're here for the reunion." ask Shinji.

"Well, Rin did ask me to give something to Illya," said Taiga.

"Rin did ask you to give something to Illya? Well, it doesn't really matter unless it's important.. I have bigger things to worry about." said Shinji before suddenly stopping and turning towards her.

"So, what are you planning to do now? If you wish to return to Fuyuki, I can have someone drive you back." ask Shinji.

"Well.. I was thinking that. If I'm here, I might as well see what my little brother is doing." answers Taiga.

"So you plan to stay?" ask Shinji,

"Yes." answers Taiga.

"This is a meeting between the participants of the holy grail war. I came as the co-master of Rider during the 5th holy grail war. What about you?" ask Shinji.

"Well…. Ummm.. I got it! I come as the representative of the Fuyuki's underworld." said Taiga with a proud smile.

"Not exactly the best answer, but I suppose that will do. And quick question, are you planning to wear this to the reunion or do you have something else in that giant backpack of yours?" ask Shinji while gesturing towards Taiga's dirty dress.

"Oh… Can I borrow your laundry room?" ask Taiga before hearing the sound of Shinji face palming himself.

"Do you seriously think that your dress is suitable clothing for this?" ask Shinji in disbelief.

"Well yes. Isn't this just like a student reunion?" ask Taiga.

"What? NO! We're dealing with sociopathic mages who would make gilles de rais look benevolence if left in a child for more than a minute. So unless you want to be dissected and stuffed into jars for "sullying their family name" I would highly suggest that you find something suitable to wear." said Shinji.

"What about a suit? I have a business suit back home for when I need to dress formally." ask Taiga.

"A business suit? Taiga, I think you're underestimating how traditional magis are. For them, a business suit is a casual outfit. Something you wear in your home when you're relaxing." said Shinji.

"Wait, what about a kimono? I still got the kimono I wore to Shirou and Sakura's wedding." ask Taiga.

"Umm… that one? That should be fine. Come, I'll drive." said Shinji as he walked to the side of a door and placed his hand on its handle. "Well? Come on! We don't have much time, we only have a few hours left. I also have to get my clothing from my house. " said Shinji before Taiga decided to follow after him.

-Line-Break-

Time skip 6:00 PM

Marching forward with determined steps, Souichirou Kuzuki only has one thing in mind. The castle of the Einzbern mage. To prepare for this particular event, he decided to wear the suit gifted to him by his late wife. While he doesn't exactly understand how it works, I do understand what it can do. It is because of her gift that he was able to survive till this day. He was on a field trip in the Oshika peninsula during the Great Tōhoku Earthquake of and a group of students were trapped under a burning building and he managed to punch his way through the concrete rubble and get everyone to high ground before the tsunami came in. The suit even allowed him to survive being crushed by a building during the evacuation. Ever since then, he has been wearing the suit to every possible event where the ability of the suit will ever be needed. Of course there is still some down side to the suit. The suit automatically uses something called Reinforcement whenever he is wearing it. As such he has to constantly control his strength to prevent a student's hand from being crushed by a simple handshake.

But nevermind that.

The reason he came here is to witness the growth of his former students. The last time he met Shirou Emiya was during his high school graduation several decades ago.

Has his dream finally come to fruition? Or was he crushed under the weight of his dream? Was he able to avoid the fate of the Red Archer?

So many questions, so little answers. But, it ends today. Today, story of a hero over 30 years in the making will face judgement

Will it be a happy ending? Or will it end in tragedy?

All shall be revealed soon.

"Hehehehe…." Kuzuki silently chuckles as the front gate of the Einzbern castle comes into view.

"Hey! Yamashiro! Over here!" came the voice of one of his closest colleagues. In front of the Einzbern gate stood Taiga Fujimura, dressed in a black kimono with a golden obi tied about her waist. Interestingly, I have always thought that despite her familial connection, she would have known about the moon lit world, but no,

she has yet to realise the world that's hidden from her.

"Taiga, my friend. It seems that your eyes have finally been opened." said Souichirou as he walked in front of Taiga. Using the voice enhancing enchantment woven into his collar to make sure that Taiga heard him while also purposely making him sound more dramatic.

"Hun…I never thought that you're a wizard, Yamashiro. But I guess that explains some part about you." said Taiga with a wide grin as she grabbed Souichirou by the hand and dragged through the gate and into the garden of the castle.

"So, Taiga. What brings you to this place abandoned by reality? Where insanity twists the world into shapes causes the human mind to babble and bray." ask Kuzuki as he scans the landscape with his eyes, looking for any possible threat.

"You know Yamashiro, more people would understand you more if you speak normally." said Taiga before dragging him through the garden and into the main building. Upon entering the building, Kuzuki eyes immediately zero on one of the weapons on the pedestal. A jagged ceremonial dagger with an iridescent blade. Slowly he walked towards it. With a shaking hand he reached his hand out to touch the dagger. Suddenly the runes positioned on the stone pedestal around the dagger glowered in light blue then arcs of electricity burst out runes in a spectacular show of force that looks like It's taken straight out of a superhero movie.

"YAMASHI!... what?" ask Taiga in pure confusion. Despite the lighting constantly coming out of the pedestal, Kuzuki seems to be completely unaffected by it due to glowing purple runes of a long forgotten language appearing around Kuzuki, making the lighting bounce harmlessly off of him. Without a second thought be grabbed the handle of the Dagger. Instantly, the electric output of the pedestal quite literally reached the ceiling as the lighting stopped resembling electricity and more like arcs of plasma. But even then, the purple glass-like layer surrounding Kuzuki blocked the lighting like it was nothing. With a single strong pull, he ripped the dagger from the pedestal. Shattering the electric runes with it.

Right after that, a horde of Einzbern homunculus rushed out of every entrance of the lobby welding weapons such as halberd, spears of lights, bows, and there were even some who were armed with muskets for some reason. Realising the situation, Taiga immediately raised both of her hands into the air.

"Oi! What the heck Yamashiro?! You got us in trouble!" hiss Taiga as she stared at her colleague, still standing in front of him.

"Then let them come, none shall impede me." said Kuzuki, seemingly oblivious to the world around him.

"Dude! We are staring down the barrels of literal guns here!" hiss Taiga upon realising that what her colleague said aggravated the Einzbern homunculus even more.

"Souichirou Kuzuki, you have removed dangerous Einzbern property from the pillar. Please return it right now for your safety." said the leading homunculi while pointing a glowing staff topped with a magenta gem at Kuzuki, though in Taiga's opinion the glaring albino child sitting on the homunculi's shoulder did make the scene look somewhat ridiculous. Is the child the leading homunculi's little brother or something?

"Einzbern property you say? For what proof do you have to support your claim? This dagger is legend manifested in physical form, a legend whose linchpin has long since passed away from reality. So pray tell? Why does this dagger still reside in the physical realm?" ask Kuzuki.

"Because….. Shirou Emiya?" said one of the Homunculi in a confused tone.

"Oh… good to know." said Kuzuki before placing the dagger back onto the now ruined pedestal.

"Wait… what?" mutters the leasing.

"Sigh~ He was asking you about the origin of that weird dagger. He just has to make it sound as dramatic as possible." said Taiga.

"Well…. Umm….. ok?" said the leading homunculi while lowering her staff in confusion.

"So, what now? We're supposed to detain them right? We can't exactly have them wanter around where they can hurt themself." ask the child while slightly poking the leading homunculi's head.

"That was our order…. But where though? With her relation with our mistress, we can't exactly detain them in the dungeon." said the homunculi.

"What about the game room? Didn't we put the el-melloi group there?" ask the child.

"You expect those two to survive being locked in the same room as 3 clock tower mages?" ask the homunculi.

"..." the child said nothing, only giving her a look that seemed to say 'are you sure about that?'.

"Alright, he will probably kill two of those three before they can kill him, but I don't think Taiga Fujimura can do the same thing." said the homunculi.

"Well Getreu is in the game room right now isn't she? She can keep the order.. Somewhat…" suggest the boy before instantly being denied.

"No, last we put her in charge of something. We returned to find her passed out drunk face first in the toilet." said the homunculi.

"But come on! How did we know that she's going to get drunk from some grape juice in the fridge? Plus, I made sure that there's no apple cider in the game room before I sent her there. Those two are going to be fine~" said the boy before conjuring up a green ball of flame from the palm of her hand. He brought the ball of flame in front of his face and blew into it. Immediately, green flame spewed out the ball like flame coming out the muzzle of a flamethrower, engulfing Taiga and Kuzuki in less than a second."

"You know Speltz, if something happens while they're in there, you're cleaning the library for next 2 month." said the homunculi as she stares at the empty spots where the two teachers once stood.

"I know Astra, I know."

-Line-Break-

'Pop!' 'Pop!'

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaa….. What?" said Taiga in confusion as she and Kuzuki popped out of thin air and despite being less than a metre into the air, Taiga still managed to crash face first onto the ground.

"Oww? Wait, it doesn't hurt." mutters Taiga as she realised that she has crashed onto a sofa that seems to be a sofa.

"Oh? So they finally caught you~ you know, I was worrying that they might have killed you~" said what Taiga remembered to be Lord El-Melloi II's little sister as she felt a finger poking her in the cheek.

"And who's this gentleman? You're boyfriend?" ask Lord El-Melloi II's little sister in an amused tone.

"No! That's Souichirou Kuzuki. The master of caster in the 5th grail war." came the familiar yet distant voice of Lord El-Melloi II.

"Another master? Tell me? Did you trigger their self defence system again? Or does the Einzbern treat all guests by locking them in a room full of games?" ask the woman.

"He tried to pull a dagger out of one of the pedestals in the lobby." answers Taiga.

"The one carved with Thurisaz runes? How is he not a smouldering pile of ash right now?" ask the woman.

"You know what? I'm not even going to ask how you know about that. Just leave me alone….." said Taiga before losing consciousness.

"I.. actually didn't expect that. Grey what are you…. Oh my~ you're getting along already." said Reines in amusement as she saw Grey handing a video game controller to the surprisingly not dead teacher.

"Do you want to play Smash Ultima?" ask Grey before she inserted the chip of the video game into the console under a large plasma screen tv.

"Prepare yourself. For you shall fall before the might of the serpents " said Kuzuki while selecting a character in light grey body armour and a black bandana.

"Bring it on!" said Grey after selecting a light orange anthropomorphic dog in a dress as her character.

"Well, this is going to be fun~ are you joining brother?" ask Reines.

"No! I'm just getting to the good part!" answer Lord El-Melloi II while sitting in front of an old pc. Apparently he was playing something called a visual novel. Something similar to a human entertainment called an auto drama, but in game form apparently.

"Well, suit yourself," said Reines before turning to Grey.

"Got room for one more?"

-Line-Break-

Meanwhile at the library…

"Tisk, we're 8 minutes and 23 seconds behind schedule due to that incident. We need to get on schedule, and fast!" Said Astra von Einzbern as she slammed her fist onto a wooden table while also instinctively releasing a wave of mana that blew small piles of documents and books onto the table and onto the ground.

"Add that to the disruption caused by the El-Mellois and we're over 1 hour behind schedule/" said Speltz without taking his eyes off the checklist written on several portable blackboards placed around them.

"Over ONE hour?! We only have one hour left!" scream Astra before she started hyperventilating. Seeing this Speltz rolled his eyes before handing Astra a paper bag for her to breathe into.

"Come on! We can do this."said Speltz only to receive an annoyed stare from Astra.

"Alright, maybe this might be a bit difficult. But… we just have to speed up the schedule for a few areas." said Speltz as he plucked an extendable pointer out of his breast pocket and pointed it towards a section of the castle on the map.

"We over half of the 3rd floor won't be used so we can cross areas 3-04 to 3-12 off of the list. This applies to the basement from floor B2 to B4 as well. Allocate the servants to the needed area like here… here… here… and here. We can start the event as soon as the dinner is ready and slowly lead the people through the finished area while we finish decorating the unfinished area. And since the first event is the dinner we prioritise the lobby Tap! dining room Tap! these 4 restrooms and these hallways Tap! stairways Tap! and this specific central elevator. Tap!" said Speltz as she tapped the tip of his pointer on various sections of the Einabern castle.

"Speltz, you're a genius! With this method we can shorten the preparation time by over 1 hour and 42 minutes!" said Astra in joy before she jumped out from behind the table and wrapped her arm around Speltz, hugging him tightly.

"Help!…. Can't…. Breathe…" weez Speltz as he is being squeezed by Astra.

"Oops, sorry!" apologise Astra as she releases him from her hug.

Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

Both Speltz and Astra turned their heads to see Shinji Matou sitting on a chair placed on the side of the room. A tablet and a touch pen placed onto the table next to him.

"Wonderfully done Speltz! You have displayed some very interesting skills, skills you as an emissary model were not ingrained with. Homunculi do not doubt their function. They know from their birth their function and have no aspiration to be anything more. Any Homunculi who stray from this standard should be deemed defected and scrapped. '' said Shinji offhandedly as he wrote something into his notepad. Hearing Shinji's statement, Speltz and Astra tensed up immediately. Mana fills the room as both Speltz and Astra silently get into a fighting stance.

"That is, if you're born 40 years ago. But nevermind that. I'm just here to check on your progress. You see, all of the expected guests are here, and according to the maid monitoring the kitchen, it seems that the food is also ready." said Shinji with an amused smirk on his face as their expression morphed into what can best be described as 'on shit!'.

"Speltz! Get a group of 4th gen warriors and head to the gaming room! Find our guest and get them to the lobby." ordered Astra while pointing towards the exit of the room.

"Got it!" Said Speltz before forming his hand into the shape of a finger gun and shooting a small ball of flame into a full length mirror at the side of the room, turning the mirror into a swirling green portal. Right after the portal was formed he jumped into the portal, closing the porting behind him. Right after Speltz left the room, Astra immediately dashed back to her desk and pressed onto the magical intercom system that was installed around the castle.

"Attention all personnel. The time schedule has been moved up and the event shall start in around 5 minutes. Approach your nearest administration unit for further instruction." said Astra into the mic of the intercom as her voice echoed around the entire Einzbern property. Right after that, Astra placed her index finger on her temple and connected herself to the administration network. The administration network is a sort of magical Multi Hive Mind prototype made for the 4th generation administration models that allows for the near instantaneous transfers of information, ideas and image between different administration models.

To all administration models listening, please direct all available personnel to the first floor lobby, the 2nd floor dining room and the corridors between them. Report back once all personnel are in place.

'Affirmative' 'Order received' 'Got it' 'Jawohl!' 'Bestätigt' 'on my way'...

Astra smiles in satisfaction as she filters through the mountain of replies. With a snap of her fingers the large top model of the Einzbern castle came to life as countless clay models of different colours walked around like ants in the model.

"Calculating their speed it would take about 3 minutes and 7 seconds for them to get to their designated location." said twilight as she stared into the mini Einzbern castle through a magnifying glass she made using graduation air.

"How long will it take for you to finish your preparation?" ask Shinji as he clipped the touch pen to the side of his tablet and stood up.

"With the current progress? 30 minutes at most. '' said Astra without looking away from the model.

"All right then. I should get my suit ready then." said Shinji as he walked out of the room.

"Interesting, very interesting." Said Shinji once he is out of the earshot of Astra as he once again took out his tablet and into the file of 2 certain individuals.

A4-3 Self appointed name: Astra.

Date of creation: March 30 2025

Weight: 45.2 kg

Hight: 160.5 cm

Generation: 4

Model: administration.

Personality analyst:

….(click to expand)

Abilities analyst:

….(click to expand)

Relationship analyst:

A4-3(Astra) displayed what seems to be an unusually high amount of familial affection towards D4-1(Speltz). Their action is far beyond the standard emotional capacity of a Einzbern homunculus. It is speculated that A4-3(Astra) has been teaching D4-1(Speltz) administration knowledge and skills over an extended period of time, which is beyond the functional need of a diplomat model. further analysis into their relationship is recommended.

"Ahhh well, I can worry about this later. Now where did I put my suit….." said Shinji to himself as he walked further down the corridors.

"Oh wait, I left it back in my car! Which is downstairs, in the basement. such a long way down…. Sigh~ better get walking then."

-Line-Break-

"So how long till you let us out?" Ask Taiga to the Female homunculus in a butler outfit sitting on the couch barricading the door after Kuzuki somehow managed to absolutely obliterate both her and Grey in the game without even dying once. After waking up from the couch she tried to leave the room but she realised that the only exit is the door that's blocked by the homunculus. While usually in these scenarios taiga would force the homunculus to move away from the door, after what happened today, Taiga really doesn't want to know what a mage with a sniper rifle that's taller than her can do to a human body.

"Well… honestly? I don't know. I was just told to keep you guys in here and make sure that none of you tries to kill each other." said the homunculus without looking up from her Indiana Jones novel.

"Is there anything I can do for you to let us out?" ask Taiga, attempting to use diplomacy, something she is horrible at.

"Nope, absolutely nothing." answers the homunculi.

"Are you absolutely sure about that?" ask Taiga.

"Yup. even if the order is from the other side of this door, I wouldn't open it." said the homunculi as a light knock appeared from the other side of the door.

"Not even that?" ask Taiga.

"Not even that." said the homunculi as a light knock once again appeared from the other side of the door, just this time, the knocking was faster and louder.

"Are you sure you're not going to answer that?" ask Taiga, starting to get a little worried.

"Not unless it's an order." answers the homunculi.

"Open the door! This is an order"

"Like that?" ask Taiga.

"It also has to be from someone with the authority to. Not just some random homunculi" said the homunculi as she flipped a page of her novel.

"It's me, Speltz, I am LITERALLY your superior!"

"Nope! You're a part of the Auswärtige Abteilung, a branch of the Verwaltungsabteilung. If you want me to move, bring Liz over." said the homunculi without a care in the world.

"But Leysritt is….. Sigh~ you know what? Fuck it, BREACH!"

BOOM!

Exactly one second after that, the entire door was blown completely off its hinges and was blown all the way to the other side of the room. Sending the homunculi crashing into the wall. Right after that 4 other homunculi in black armour and 2 homunculi in servant uniform came walking in following a very annoyed Speltz.

"Sigh~ now we gotta fix the door.. You do that later." said Speltz, pointing at the maid standing next to him. "

"Owwww…" moan the homunculi while wiggling around her now broken arm like a noodle.

"Oh god! Are you alright?" ask Taiga in concern as she was about to rush to apply first aid before being stopped by Speltz.

"That's not, as a combat model she comes with a passive healing ability. Such trivial things as broken bones won't bother her." said Speltz as he turned his attention away from the homunculi and towards their guest.

"Good evening. Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Speltz von Einzbern, but please, call me Speltz.." said Speltz as he greets the people in the gaming room.

"Good evening as well. A pleasure to meet you, I personally find the Einzbern's collection of video games to be quite a delightful surprise." said Lord El-Melloi II as his mind reflectively kicked into diplomacy mode thanks to years of experience in the harsh political battleground of the clocktower.

"Why thank you, our creator has spent a great deal of time amassing these video games. But right now, we must change our location. It's almost time for the reunion banquet to start" reply Speltz as he looked around for any flat surface, finding no flat surface large enough to serve as a portal unless he wished to use the floor. But then, he remembered something Astra told him about the Mage Association and how sealing destinations work.

Ok…. maybe that's not a good idea.

"Please follow me to the 3rd floor waiting room." said Speltz before turning and leading the group out of the door and through the hallway and into the main lounge outside the dining room of the Einzbern castle which was decorated in the same outrageously luxurious way. Waiting in the lounge was a albino woman in a long white robe trimmed in gold. A robe that someone as experienced in clocktower politics as himself would instantly know what it represents. That robe is a robe reserved for Einzbern elders. There is also an inhuman aura around her that reminds him of the Wizard marshal. These and the fact that she seems to be the host of this event immediately told him the identity of this woman. The Magician of Heaven's Feel, Illyasvel von Einzbern. And if she is remotely similar to other magicians he has met before then he should probably expect some very eccentric personality.

"Welcome to our holy grail war veteran reunion. Please, have a drink." said Illya with a smile while gesturing towards the mini bar on her left side.

"We thank you for your generosity." said Lord El-Melloi II with a deep bow. Right after that Taiga immediately tried walking towards the bar before instantly being dragged back by Lord El-Melloi II.

"I'm terribly sorry about my actions. But I hope you understand that I can't just accept any drink from strangers. '' said Lord El-Melloi II while holding back Taiga by grabbing the collar of her kimono. While such action would normally be seen as rude and disrespectful. He can afford to do so due to his status as a Lord of the Clocktower as well as his reputation of having a "no bullshit attitude" even towards the Vice Director of the Clock Tower.

"It IS a completely logical assumption under any other circumstances but if my assumption was correct then you should have the alchemical skills to find any form of harmful toxin that might be in the drinks, No? Plus the fallout of even attempting to kill a Lord of the Clock Tower would be disastrous. Unlike what many paranoid families of the Aristocratic Faction speculates, the Einzberns aren't interested in The Clocktower unless it affects us directly." said Illya before as a sign of friendship, she walked over to the mini bar and poured a fresh pot of coffee into a white mug and drink it all at once.

"See? No poison." said Illya before placing the mug down. Turning around to show that she was perfectly fine. Though she was trying very hard to hide the bitter taste on her tongue. Under any other circumstance she wouldn't be caught dead drinking something as disgusting as black coffee, but sometimes, sacrifices must be made for the sake of something greater. Though she will try to wash down the bitter taste on her tongue with a glass of milkshake later.

"If you wish to skip all those politicians' talk then I shall as well. I personally see them as a waste of precious time anyway. But even if one doesn't do cloak and dagger, you still have to watch out for other people doing them to you. Even if you provide proof that that the coffee isn't dangerous to you doesn't mean that it isn't dangerous to me. The biology of a human is very different from a dead apostle's after all. '' said Lord El-Melloi II casually. Causing everyone to suddenly look in his direction.

"How did…." ask Illya before suddenly being interrupted by Lord El-Melloi II.

"You were hiding it well, much better than most. But compared to the Wizard Marshal, your skills are lacking." said Lord El-Melloi II casually before he continued.

"A dead apostle has the ability to rewind their own body as a form of regeneration. So even if you were poisoned you can simply rewind your body back to before you got poisoned to get rid of it. But I would also take your word for it. There have been many chances today where you could safely kill us and claim it as self defence." Said Lord El-Melloi II calmly before reaching into his cloak and pulling out a few test tubes.

"Just in case." said Lord El-Melloi II before he started to pour various solutions into the test tubes.

"Very well then. I suppose we should just wait until… nevermind." said Illya who sudden;y realised that during the time when they were talking, Reines has already taken several bottles of red wine and is currently chugging them down like alcohol shots.

"Sigh~ Reines, I have no idea how many times I need to say this to get through to you, but once YOU'RE DRINKING TOO MUCH! What if it was poisoned?" ask Lord El-Melloi II, his vein visibly bulging.

"Oh brother~ did you honestly think that I would ever leave my house without these tablets you made? I have FAR more experience in having my food poisoned than you ever did." said Reines while shaking a highly decorated ivory pillbox for him to see.

"Sigh~ of course you brought it. Only you would take that toy around" said Lord El-Melloi II.

"A toy? Brother, what you created is not just a mere toy. This thing you created is revolutionary! Did you know that the poison testing kit that my maid usually carries around since i was a child is the size of a suitcase. And even then the effectiveness of these tablets far surpasses anything on the magical market. I have even taken the liberty of patterning your formula with the Department of Policies. You have me to thank for the increase in your allowance. With the money we are earning you might not even have to pass your title to me~ We might be able to buy another lord title for me." said Reines, her smug expression in full display,

"That is not possible, mages would probably buy it as a charity at most. There is no reason for people to buy enough for me to gain over 200 Grand increase in salary, and knowing you, you probably have taken 90% of the profit already. There is no way there would be that many people who would… wait… Reines? What did you do?" ask Lord El-Melloi II, fearing that he would have to clean up another mess once he got back to London.

"Me? Oh, nothing. It's just considering the nature of our work, the demand for these kinds of things is naturally high, you know. " said Reines, being extremely tempted to slap her brother's face with a stack of cash, but unfortunately due to their current circumstances, she is unable to do that right now. Maybe she should do that after they get back to their hotel.

"She is right about that my lord." came a female voice from behind Illya. Then from behind Illya a woman wearing a two piece business suit with a necktie.

"Umm? Bazett? What are you doing here? This is an event for Holy grail war veterans." said Lord El-Melloi II, an expression of confusion plastered on his face.

"Sigh~ This again, I was in the Fifth Holy Grail, the master of lancer. The only reason you didn't know about it is because I was taken out before the war even began." said Bazett, before raising her left arm in front of her for all to see. She pulls off the glove on her left arm to reveal a metallic prosthetic hand instead of a normal hand made of flesh and bone like what many would expect to see.

"My left arm was cut off by a golden-haired servant that was an ally of Kirei Kotomine, the supervisor sent by the church. I was removed from fuyuki by my servant before the war even began. Normally I don't have any reason to be here but the association and the El-Melloi deemed that it is unsafe for you to come there without proper protection. That's why I was sent here, I hope that won't be a problem. '' said Bezett before putting the glove back onto her hand.

"No, the former El-Melloi lord did die here during the fourth holy grail war. it is perfectly understandable to take precaution to make sure such things don't happen again." said Illya, taking a sip of the milkshake that just arrived moments ago. Completely ignoring the fact that she almost turned Bezett into a human swiss cheese a few hours ago when she showed up to the castle's front gate unannounced.

"Thank you for your understanding." said Bazett with a short bow.

"Lord El-Melloi II, is there anyone else from the clock tower coming I should be aware of?" ask Illya.

"No, not that I'm aware of. '' said Lord El-Melloi II.

"Hey Illya, Hans decided to bring some… oh, we got a guest?" said a well dressed Shinji as walked into the room with a colossal, statue-like man.

"Yes, we do have some guests, what is it that Hans has decided to bring us?" ask Illya.

"Oh, Hans decided to make some Hors d'oeuvres for us." said Shinji as he moved aside while Han's step forward holding a metal tray, revealing many different colourful foods placed in small plates.

"Oh? So you're telling me that this made these colourful Hors d'oeuvres? How interesting~" said Reine as she hopped over to the front of the man.

"Mind if I take one?" ask Reine who was replied with a quick nod on the head by the giant. While normally Reines wouldn't take these kinds of foods from strangers, but considering that the man in front of her looks like he could kill her by slightly pinching 2 of his fingers together, the chances of a poison attempt from Hans before is basically zero. Plus the food Hans was holding was way too interesting to not try out. In fact, if they didn't explicitly say that the thing in front of her was food, she would have thought that it was one of those modern art one can find in London's art gallery. While it was not her first time seeing and eating foods that look like art, this is her first time seeing something that looks more like a piece of art than food made for consumption.

"Hun… Fascinating." mutters Reines not seeing anything that remotely resembles food on the plate she took. The most common Hors d'oeuvres in any formal event is the shrimp cocktail which the thing in front of her obviously isn't. Well… honestly…. Reines don't know that the THING in front of her is. What is it anyway? The only thing she recognized is some kind of foam that was used in where the sauce should be.

"Well the only way to find out is to take a bite." said Reines cheerfully before taking a small appetiser fork and using it to cut into the food and take a small bite out of it.

"Oh… my! This!" said Reines in shock, unable to process what she just ate. From a single bite she felt at least 3 different temperatures in a single bite. How could that be? While it is not rare for a dish to have 2 or more different temperatures such as brownie ice cream, the dishes before her are completely different from the ones before him. She has absolutely no idea how the thing in front of her was made or what it even is but one thing she can confirm is that it tastes incredibly good.

"Oh? Now, that is certainly an interesting take on Thermal cooking." said Lord El-Melloi II without even taking a bite of the food.

"Eh? Brother, how do you know what it is?" ask Reines.

"Look at that area." said Lord El-Melloi II, pointing at the side of the dish that has been cut through,

"Oh~ so it's like a cake. How colourful. But that doesn't explain its flavour." said Reines. The inside of the dish seems to be similar to a cake with it being made up of several layers of different colours being layered on top of each other.

"Try taking apart the dish. The different layers were probably made of several completely different things. Look at that cream between the layers. Those aren't cream, those are foam. Much like snow, the structure of foams is naturally insulating. I also suspect some uses of culinary magecraft to enhance the flavour." said Lord El-Melloi II.

"Culinary magecraft… that's a thing?" ask Taiga.

"I heard it was a very recent development. Apparently a few decades ago someone from the Department of Policies decided to open his own cooking class by buying a classroom in the City of Westminster near the Clocktower. For some reason, the class became quite popular and soon became its own branch of magecraft through the Department of Creation keep insisting that the Culinary magecraft is simply a branch of their own department." said Illya in amusement, while she really doesn't care about what's going on in London, she does like to keep up with the recent trend of magecraft.

"Lady Einzbern, you have quite the insight into the Clocktower but I fear that I must inform you that your information is somewhat out of date. The Culinary magecraft now belongs to its own minor department. While not nearly large and powerful enough to be with the 12 major departments with its own lord as its head, that might soon change with the department's rising popularity." said Lord El-Melloi II.

"Cooking is considered by many to be the oldest form of art, so I suppose that isn't very strange. Well now that that is taken care of, please enjoy Hans's lovely dish while we wait for…. Oh… it seems that dinner is ready. Well then, I'm sure you've all been quite hungry from the trip from London so how about we fill our stomach with some foods." said Illya all while staring into a crystal ball placed on the End Table next the sofa she is sitting on, completely ignoring a Hans who just realised that his food isn't going to be enjoyed by his creator.

"Don't worry Hans, you'll get your change someday." said Shinji while patting Han's on his lower back, because Shinji's hand can't reach Han's upper back due to Han's inhuman height.

"Say, where's Rin?" ask Taiga, wondering where Rin is.

"Rin.. let's see if she is in the forest…." said Illya as she hovered one of her hands above the crystal ball.

"Oh… It looks like she is near the entrance of the forest." said Illya.

"That's about an hour run even with her speed." said Shinji.

"Sigh~ I'll send a squad to fetch her." said Illya before standing up and walking out of the room.

"Come on Taiga, don't you want to finally get to eat Shirou and Sakura's food? It's been literal years since I ate his food." said Shinji before following after Illya.

"Oh, right." said Taiga before her and Kuzuki follow suit.

-Line-Break-

A lone figure in red was seen sprinting through the brick road that led to Einzbern castle. Her speed is so fast that one would mistake her for a racing sports car going at max speed, leaving a gust of wind behind her wherever she goes

"Shit, the dinner has already started." hiss Rin after taking a glance toward her watch. She has spent too much time in Fuyuki trying to make sure that nothing will go wrong. Well, not exactly making sure that nothing will go wrong, if her years of experience has taught her anything it's that something will DEFINITELY go wrong when they are gone. All she did was doing everything in her power to make sure that any thing that did go wrong would be quickly stamped down to prevent any civilian casualties and damage.

"I fucking hate her." hiss Rin, thinking back to the fake nun. While she is not as bad as her father, she certainly has inherited many of his absolutely insufferable traits. The way she purposely does everything in slow motion including speaking just to get on her nerves is one of the many examples. What she could have done in 2 minutes has been stretched to over half an hour. And that's not even adding the time the nun wasted poking her trauma.

"Sigh~ Are all the people in the church like that? No, Merem Solomon is a nice person, and he's a dead apostle ancestor! There's definitely something wrong with the kotomine bloodline. Is sadism inherited or something?" said Rin to herself.

"Hey! Over her!" came a femine voice from in front of her, looking in front of her saw a group silhouette with the leading one waving at her.

"An Einzbern patrol guard? Are they my escort?" thought Rin once she got close enough to properly see the group clearly. They're all dressed in a way that people would mistake them as mountain hikers unless you're extremely sensitive to mana and know what you're doing. It's surprising the amount of mountain hikers that wanders into the Einzbern forest each year, so they dressed as mountain hikers to minimise suspicion and guide lost mountain hikers out of the forest.

"Umm… yep. Definitely the Tohsaka. Hey! Miss Tohsaka! We were told to take you to the Einzbern castle. ''said the homunculi.

"Oh.. well sure. I was running out of time anyway. How are you going to send me to the castle faster anyway?" ask Rin.

"Oh.. That's easy. We will launch you there." said the homunculi with a smile.

"Wait, launch me?... Whoa! What are you doing!" ask Rin as the homunculi grabbed Rin by the waist and lifted her off the ground.

"Package secured. Connecting to Sternenstraße….. Destination: Einzbern castle. Fuyuki Branch. Distant identified. Calculating boosting circle coordinate… Calculation completed. Commence transport. " said homunculi in monotone as several glowing blue magic circles appeared to form a line that stretches all the way from Rin's current location all the way to the Einzbern castle.

"Please keep your hands, arms, feet and legs inside the perimeter of the circles at all times. While it is not necessarily, full body reinforcement is highly recommended to reduce the chance of injury." said the homunculi.

"Wait, what do you mean by thaAAAAAAAAA!" scream Rin as she was shot through the air towards the Einzbern castle at near the speed of sound.

-Line-Break-

"So…. Illya… Shinji….. Mind explaining to me again about this holy grail war again? Because I thought you just said that Saber is actually King Arthur" said Taiga.

"No, you heard it right. Saber, that blond girl with hair bun. Is indeed King Arthur from Arthurian legend." said Illya.

"Wait, I thought Saber is Kiritsugu's old college," said Taiga.

"That is also true. Saber is Kiritsugu's servant during the fourth grail war and Shirou's servant during the Fifth grail war, but that's not important right now. All you need to know is that holy grail war it's a dumb death game where people summon summon heros from the past-" "or the future." "or the future to fight in a battle royal for a monkey's paw where all rules are made to be broken because what do you expect from a group of amoral power hungry sociopaths?" said Shinji.

"You know, I am supposed to be offended by this. But no, he just described us perfectly." said Reines.

"Sigh~ that's what we get when the majority of our people are so morality corrupted that we make the Nazis and Imperial Japanese looks like saint when compared to us." said Lord El-Melloi II, sighing along with the rest of the table.

"Umm… guys. I know this is a dumb question, but have you concidered getting a therapist?" ask Taiga.

"What's a…. Therapist?" Ask Reines.

"Wait, they don't know what a therapist is?" ask Taiga.

"Remember when Rin said that mages are old fashioned?" ask Shinji.

"Yes." answer Taiga.

"Well, the action of treating mental problems as an actual problem that needs to be treated, and not just treating them as proof of demonic possession. It is a relatively modern thing." said Shinji.

"To clarify, throughout history we were usually the ones on the receiving end of these "treatment", so most mages view therapy as an excuse by the mundane to lock them up and steal their research, which for some reason is more worrisome for them than the former/" said Lord El-Melloi II.

"Oh… well, way to go, pouring cold water on us." said Taiga.

Knock Knock

"Come in!" said Illya in response to the knocking noise.

"Excuse me" said Speltz as he and a homunculi holding a thick sleeping mattress walked into the room. Speltz walked to the window while the homunculi walked to the front of the room setting the mattress vertically.

"Speltz, is there a problem?" ask Illya.

"No, not at all." said Speltz as he held his 2 hands onto the window and pulled it open.

"Considering the urgency of the situation the patrol teams decided to change the destination of Rin's starroad," said Speltz.

"And the coordinate is?" ask Illya.

"Here." answers Speltz as a red blur flew through the window and over the table straight into the mattress.

"Owwww…. Have they ever heard of deceleration?" groan Rin in pain for slowly sliding off of the mattress and onto the room.

"You're here, wonderful." smile Illya, completely ignoring the pain Rin is currently going through.

"Oh god! Are you ok?" ask Taiga, dashing out of her seat and kneeling down next to Rin.

"I'm… fine…." hiss Rin, her body still stinging from the impact.

"You don't sound like you're fine. Let me help you." said Taiga as she held Rin up in a princess carry and stood up from the ground.

"Do you require medical assistance?" ask Speltz.

"Sigh~ no, just bring me to my seat please. '' said Rin, not wishing to know what kind of monstrous practice these Einzbern homunculi considers "medical assistance".

"Very well, though we will provide some painkillers for you should you need it." said Speltz

"Yea, some painkillers would be nice. Get me some of those" said Rin.

"Order received." said Speltz before he walked out of the room along with the homunculi carrying the mattress.

"Illya, you better teach your homunculus some deceleration spells because that landing I almost broke my neck." said Rin, massaging the back of her spine.

"So?" ask Illya, not understanding the problem.

"So?! She would be paralysed from the neck down till she had her neck fixed!" Yell Taiga in rage. While medical advancement has allowed patients to achieve full recovery from spinal cord injuries. It will still take weeks if not month of medical treatment for them to fully recover. From what she learned from some of her students, Spinal rehabilitation is not a pleasant experience.

"Sigh~ Taiga, I'm a Einzbern. I can change people's organs with the same ease a mechanic would when changing the components of a car. She did break her neck, I can probably replace the neck with a neck of higher quality. Heck, can even make the neck glow in the dark!" said Illya, completely unaware of how weird what she just said would sound to an outsider.

"...What?" ask Taiga, confused as to why making the neck glow in the dark is a part of the conversation.

"Hehehehehe….. Glow in the dark neck…. Why don't you also give it a cup holder?" ask Shinji jokingly, wiping a drop of tear from his eyes.

"I mean, in certainty can….. I would probably make it retractable to save spaces. I can use bones to create the main structure while using muscles to replace the mechanical part of the cup holder." said Illya, her words only causing shinji to laugh even louder.

"Did I hear something about a cup holder?" ask the gentle female voice before a woman in a wheelchair gets pushed into the dining room by a homunculi.

"Eh? Sakura? Why are you in a wheelchair? Are you injured?" ask Taiga in concern.

"Me? No.. it's just some post surgery fatigue. Brother said that it should go away after a few weeks." said Sakura softly like he always does.

"Well, after that you might need to go through some physical rehabilitation depending on how bad the muscular atrophy gets. The medical exoskeleton I ordered for you arrived 2 days ago. You can try them out once we make sure you are fully healed. Can't have those surgical wounds opening up again." said Shinji before he personally got up from his seat and moved an empty seat to the side of the room

"Petra, move please move my sister here." said Shinji, gesturing towards the now empty spot. While Shinji doesn't interact with H4-13 otherwise known as Petra much, he was personally involved in the creation of all 4th generation Einzbern homunculus. It's natural that he would know about her. Though it is a bit more difficult finding their preferred name as 4th generation homunculus tends to prefer using names they give themselves instead of the number they were born with. Not that he sees anything wrong with it. Shinji does like to treat homunculus like humans instead of like tools, it's just sometimes there are names that just makes him cringe. One time there was a chef homunculi who named himself Chris P. Bacon von Einzbern. Shinji spent months trying to convince him to change his name to something else. At least her name is normal and not some weird anime from the early 2000 era.

"Heh…. this is fun." said Taiga quietly as she is spinning the large Lazy Susan placed in the middle of the table. Causing the group to chuckle at her antics.

"So Sakura, where's the food? I'm starving." ask Taiga, asking the question everyone on the table wanted to ask but was too polite to ask.

"The food is already done. It's just a matter of moving them here." said Sakua.

"Are they… oh, there they are." came the voice of Shirou Emiya before he came walking into the room pushing a dinner cart.

"Sorry about the wait, we spent a few hours crafting the big pots." said Shirou before plave

"Wait, crafting big pots?" ask Taiga, with everyone on the table except Sakura being very confused.

"Well, they were vats to be exact. I tried finding some spare steel or clay to make it using alteration, but we got caught by one chef homunculi who was pissed that he can't be in the kitchen. I asked him about where to find the needed material, he was confused. I spent a few minutes explaining my plan to him. He seems to like my idea because he suddenly disappeared for a few minutes and came back with a group of disgruntled chefs and bored mystic cold crafters with nothing to do. He told me to tell them the same thing I said to him, and so I did." said Shirou causally, causing Illya, Shinji and Sella to groan.

"What did they make and how many?" ask Shinji, causing Sella to wave the homunculi holding the crystal ball to walk over to her.

"4 giant vats of varying size, materials and enchantment. The smallest one is looking to contain at least 1000L of volume." said Sella, looking through the crystal ball.

"Illya, looks like we need to expand the unusual mystic code section of the vault, again." said Shinji, massaging the bridge of his nose.

"Sigh~ yea, I'll do that tomorrow, I really don't want to deal with this right now. Let's just eat already." said Illya, waving any extra homunculi kept in the room for security purposes away.

"Um, today we'll be serving something a bit different that what you are used to." said Shirou as a homunculi placed a small plate and a bowl in front of each person sitting around the table.

"Oh~ are we eating Dim Sum? I haven't tried that for a while." ask Shinji while rubbing his hand together.

"No, but you aren't far off." said Shirou before putting a large pot into the middle of the Lazy Susan on the table. Then from the dining cart, he brought out several large plates with cloche placed on top of and and set them around the table.

"Umm… Rin, is that normal." ask Taiga, pointing at Shirou's feet where a light blue magic circle appeared is slowly increasing in luminosity and size.

"Sigh~ not now. Shirou, the counter force is calling you." said Rin, pointing at the magic beneath Shirou's feet.

"Oh, she really is! Wait, let me go pack up my stuff." said Shirou, with a slight hint of urgency.

"What? No! You just came back from a literal WAR! At least wait another week before throwing yourself into the fire again." Said Rin, smacking Shirou on the head.

"But there are people that need saving." argues Shirou.

"..."

"What? Do none of you get excited by that?" ask Shirou.

"No."

"Not really"

"I mean, that's a good mindset to have. It's just that, well, anything in excess is bad and you have jumped beyond the point of excess already. Shirou, if you keep this up, soon this is going to be worse than your pipe obsession back during high school." said Sakura in a worried tone.

"You know what? Fine, you can go." said Rin, after a few seconds of thinking.

"Great! I'll-"

"Tomorrow! You can go tomorrow. But tonight, you stay." said Rin firmly.

"Oh, come on! Every time the Counter Force decided to fling him to another world, it would be days, months, even years before he is sent back, that that is if the one who requested for him to be summon is kind enough to send him after he is done and doesn't just kill him or throw him away like a pack of singal uses plastic." said Shinji remembering words that Shirou was sent to and how many of those worlds have the tendency to summon teenage high schoolers to do their jobs. And the funny thing is, most of those worlds are worlds with easy to understand magic systems, stuck in the age of god/mage and it's almost always the technological equivalent of the mediaeval ages for god knows how long. The Isekai phenomenon according to Rin.

"Don't worry, I will put a cross dimensional beacon on him before he leaves, that way I can save time shifting through dimensions and finding where he is." said Rin.

"So you can do that? Why didn't you do this sooner? Do you know many realms of gods we have to raid in order to find where Shirou was sent to last time? I spent 2 months shifting through the divine realm's paperwork only to find that it wasn't even them who took you!" said Shinji, yelling angrily at Shirou.

"Well, it is usually them who would summon people to deal with world-ending threats,"said Shirou.

"Yes, I know. we got the message after our 3rd time knocking on their door." said Shinji.

"You can't blame them, Shirou is prime Isekai Hero material." said Sakura.

"Can't they at least inform us first before taking him? Originally, people would think that getting a letter of apology from literal gods would be an honour, but now? It's just annoying."

-Line-Break-

While the people around the table are discussing Shirou's predicament, Lord El-Melloi II is thinking about his current situation . Before even going to Japan he already knew that this was going to be dangerous. Japan as well as other growing numbers of countries are known for their anti-mage task forces which started to appear in a not so surprising response to foreign as well as domestic mages that have a tendency to do things that makes the worst atrocities people see on the news look tame.

During the entire trip Lord El-Melloi II was banking on his reputation as an open Lord who welcomes changes as well as holding a set of strict moral code to prevent his group from being shot on site. Lord El-Melloi II has an idea he always keeps at heart: Staying composed is always the best way to survive in the clocktower. Staying composed means attracting less attention, to not bleed in a tank full of hungry sharks ready to feed. Plus, this is not the first time he dealt with people who could easily kill him. The idea is to keep as little attention to yourself while collecting information for leverage. And the best part is, unlike those prenenchous fucks at the clocktower, they aren't even trying to hide their feeling behind layers upon layes of proverb and deception.

They're speaking so normally, acting so vulnerable, usually acting like that would be sign of weakness usually only seen on clocktower newcomers, naive childs who thinks that the Clocktower is Hogwart who will ether proceed to have that naive brutally beat out of them or end up as jars of organs in some magus's workshop.

But, why is it that them acting so carelessly don't seem weak to Lord El-Melloi II? Acting like there isn't a small but powerful coalition of mages that's actively trying to bring them down and strap them to an operation table.

If people heard that the monsters in the far east are acting like normal humans instead of like the monster they are, he will be laughed out of Clocktower but here he is, sitting around the round table with two holders of true magic, the Wrought Iron Hero and the infamous Butcher of Mystery sharing a dinner while they're casually talking about a calling by counter force like a nuance. They act with the interest of each other in mind instead of personal gain at the sacrifice of others. Willing to help each other even if it means enraging the wrath of being more powerful than them. A far cry from the social behaviour of magus which according to sum up in one sentence would be 'sociopathic assholes.'

Ironic isn't it? Magus' ideology claims that you must give up your humanity in exchange for power. But the ones with the most power are the ones with the most humanity.

"Shirou stayed still for a moment." said Shinji, getting up from his chair and walking next to Shirou. With one hand he grabbed the back of Shirou's collar and lifted him into the air.

"Eh! Shinji, what are you doing-"

"Break." whispers Shinji as he pointed his palm towards the magic circle, causing the magic circle to shatter like it is made out of glass.

"There, now the problem is solved. Please continue with the explanation Shirou, I'm starving." said Shinji casually before getting back to his seat.

"Um… ok? This pot is the main dish, a one pot meal of sorts. It contains all the nutrition you need in a meal…" said Shirou as started introducing the dish one by one, but by now, Lord El-Melloi II had stopped listening to what Shirou was saying.

They just hung up on Alaya

THEY JUST HUNG UP ON ALAYA!

"Wha…. what the fuck…" mutters Lord El-Melloi II incoherently as his brain is unable comprehend the absurdity that was in front in him. One does not simply deny the counter force their request. Doing so is usually to inquire the wrath of Alaya in the form of a counter guardian knocking on their door, which in most cases is much more dangerous than a servant due to their near limitless mana source from the counter force. And here these people are hanging Alaya like they're some telecom company trying to trick you into buying their horrible sub par service.

"Now, this plate of meat is what we call Karaage chicken. A form of Japanese fried chicken-"

RUMBLE!

The booming rumble thunders across the entire castle, when looking through the window, people could see an ethereal dome appeared over the entire Einzbern forest, showing that something is attacking the Einzbern castle's outer bounded field.

"WHAT?! Are we under attack?" ask Illya as she stood up from the seat.

"Strange… there shouldn't be anyone else in Japan with that much mana to cause the castle's bounded field to glow this brightly." said Shinji while rubbing his chin.

"Don't Arcueid and Aoko have the ability to do this kind of damage?" ask Sakura.

"No, Arcueid and her Husband would be able to break the outer barrier like they're wet tissue, they won't have to resort to something like this." said Illya, walking to the window observing the condition of the barrier.

"It can't be BLUE either, she has massive destructive ability, but that's due to her mana efficiency. She doesn't have the mana capacity to do this. Plus BLUE's spell is highly destructive, if it is her, we would have seen the sign already." adds Shinji, too busy scooping Beef Bourguignon from the pot into his own bowl to even look at the window.

"What if this isn't caused by a person?" ask Lord El-Melloi II as pieces finally started to click together in his mind. And just as that's happening a large ring of red light appeared along the edge of the Einzbern forest's Bounded field, covering the starry sky in a red, ominous glow.

"What if it was the counter force, and-"

"She is trying to Isekai the entire Einzbern forest. Wow, I'm impressed. Either we pissed the counter force off that much or she's really desperate." said Illya with a chuckle.

"Alaya doesn't take rejection well does she? Hehehe…"adds Shinji while chucking.

"Imagine how much mana she has invested into that magical magical circle? It must be absolutely massive." said Illya in amazement.

"Are you two mad! The Counterforce is trying to conduct mass teleportation and you're making jokes?!" scream Lord El-Melloi II in both frustration and outrage.

"There's no need to be worried. Shirou? Be a dear and give the counterforce a good stab with the Rule Breaker would you." ask Rin. In response, Shirou wordlessly moved to the window. Then-

BOOOM!

Floor tiles flew everywhere as Shirou launched himself out of the window like an artillery shell towards the edge of the Einzbern outer barrier. Leaving behind a dining room with one sixth of its floor cracked or having its tile flinged out.

"Well. there he goes. Illya, can you get some tiler here to fix this floor before he gets back?" ask Shinji, placing his bowl down after inhaling an entire bowl of Beef Bourguignon.

"Sella, please get us a tiller to fix this mess." ask Illya while gesturing towards the broken floor.

"Yes ma'am." said Sella while bowing before walking away.

Illya then turned and towards and Lord El-Melloi II and spoke

"We apologise for the incident but it seems that dinner has to be postponed for a few minutes. If you have anything that needs to be fulfilled don't be afraid to ask. We shall achieve your request." said Illya as she and every other Einzbern in the room bowed to him in unison.

"Do any of you need any refreshment?" ask an Einzbern maid as she walked in holding a small black leather book with the golden word Speisekarte sewed onto the cover.

"Sigh~ yes, get me the strongest drink you can find" said Lord El-Melloi II slowly as if he is in pain.

"Um, are you sure? Gem Clear isn't really a drink, it is more of just a-"

"I don't care, get me that." said Lord El-Melloi II instantly.

"Umm… ok. If you say so."

-Line-Break-

What is the counterforce trying to do? A magic circle this big would cost an astronomical amount of mana. According to Rin, the amount of mana needed to even create a small, one time path to another world is already enormous, and Rin is only capable of doing so because Kaleidoscope allows her to gather infinite mana from an infinite alternate world. The counterforce sadly doesn't have that kind of ability, it has to use its own mana reserve to power the magic circle. If Shirou's assumption is correct, then the mana needed to support this giant magic circle would surpass even the mana stored inside the Greater grail by orders of magnitude, which according to Rin, once contains approximately one trillion units of mana. As someone who once only had the capacity of 20-30 units of mana, the ridiculous amount of mana is simply unthinkable to him.

Shirou is currently soaring through the air using 2 large wing shaped swords as glider and tracing sword shaped platforms in the air for a little boost whenever he needs to maintain velocity.

After a few seconds he glided to the edge of the forest where from the sky, he can see the giant glowing red runes of the magic circle spinning around the entire perimeter of the Einzbern castle. Letting go of the glider, he lets gravity pull him down to earth as the horizontal movement from when he was still on the glider moves him forward as he falls to the ground.

"Sorry to do this, this magic circle is too dangerous!" said Shirou as a jagged prismatic short sword was traced into his hand. He raises his hand into the air, ready to stab the weapon down into the ground.

Just as Shirou passes the outer barrier of the Einzbern forest, the strong glow of the magic circle becomes even brighter. Engulfing Shirou in a blinding red light.

"RULE BREAKE-"

BAAAAAAAAAAA!

-Line-Break-

A massive burst of mana, light and sound overwhelmed Shirou's senses as he fell to the ground. But thankfully he managed to regain his senses just in time to perform a roll as he landed on the ground, increasing the amount of time it took from him to decelerate to a halt.

"I was too late. Sigh~ I should've been faster." mutters Shirou in disappointment as he stares into the starry night sky, it seems that in this world the night sky is the same as his. But then again it might be day right now and during the day time the sky is just dark.

"Alright, lets see what I'm working with." said Shirou as raised his foot into the sky before with one swing of his foot downward, he used his momentum to kick himself off the floor before handing on his feet.

"Umm…. I assume this is a type of tree that's native to this word. '' said Shioru as he stared at the wall of trees in front of him in pure wonder. It seems to be a biolumence variant of the wisteria tree you can see in Japan's Ashikaga Flower Park. Shirou has to admit that seeing a sea of these wisteria hanging from the tree roof is certainly breathtakingly beautiful.

"I should probably take a few samples." said Shirou before walking towards the dangling vines to find any intact seed pods to collect.

"Don't get close to it!" came an urgent voice from behind him in some kind of variant of Japanese, Shirou turned his head behind him to see the person shouting at him.

Behind him standing where the tree separates from the wisteria to normal trees that one could commonly see in the mountains of japan. The person calling him is a bit unique too. Dressed in a dirty old hanten, the person has unnaturally pale skin, a single horn on his forehead, feline-like eyes and very sharp fingernails and teeth. Are these the inhabitants of this world? Because if so, it's best to establish a peaceful first contact. racing both of his arm up to show that he carries no weapon, he put up his best smile and said,

"HELLO! I COME IN PEACE!"

Chapter end

Some additional informations about the Einzbern homunculi

Einzbern model:

E= Environmental maintenance homunculi

C= general combat homunculi.

B= backup homunculi

H= general household homunculi

A= administration homunculi.

R= research homunculi.

(….)

Einzbern homunculus generation.

1st generation homunculi were created by Justeaze Lizrich von Einzbern herself through the use of Heaven's Feel, these homunculi are known for being extremely powerful, considered closer to a Phantasmal Species than a homunculus. After the death of Justeaze Lizrich von Einzbern most of these 1st generation homunculi were put to sleep with the remaining ones becoming the elders of the Einzbern family with Jubstacheit von Einzbern as the 8th head of the family.

2nd generation homunculi

2nd generation homunculi were first created after the death of Justeaze Lizrich von Einzbern. With the lack of the third magic, the power of the 2st generation homunculi decreased dramatically when compared to its predecessor.

3rd generation homunculi

Due to the degradation of mystery throughout the word, the magical potency of mages were slowly degraded as technology marches on. The Einzberns were no different. As the human understanding of the human body became more and more refined, the mystery behind homunculus became weaker and weaker. The 3rd generation was developed to counteract that. The 3rd generation homunculus makes up for its lack of power by having a more efficient body and mana transference system.

4th generation homunculi

A joint project by the Einzbern and Matou family. The return of the 3rd magic allows for the usage of many homunculi creation techniques that were unavailable for over a 2 century. These combined with some of the most advanced biological technologies in the world at that time allows for the creation of homunculus that surpasses the 2nd and 3rd generations by leaps and bounds in magical potency and efficiency. While powerful, they aren't as skilled as the previous generation due to them lacking the centuries of firsthand experience their predecessor might have.

Ah finally, we started the demon slayer part of the story!

WOOO!

So, what do you guys think? A pacifist Dead Apostle meeting a Demon. Sounds like a start to a joke.

I hope you guys like this chapter, this chapter was extra long because i need to fit everything needed for the prologue into this chapter. Hopefully the next few chapter will be shorter and thus less time consuming.