Thank you as always for reading. Hope that you are still enjoying the story.
Sorry it's a little shorter than normal.
Caelia placed a hand on each of their shoulders. "There is still much to talk about." She said as they turned to look at her. Trying to take in and process what she had just said. "We'll do that in the morning. When you can meet everyone else. Now it's time for you to rest." She spoke quickly but gently.
The many new questions they had lodged in their throats, unable to for the words to ask them quite yet. There was time for that tomorrow. Caelia didn't seem to be willing to answer any further questions on the matter right now. not wanting to risk her refusing to answer their questions at a later date, they remained quiet for now. Caelia caried on telling them that there were spare rooms they could stay in, and that some food would be brought to them in a little while. Neither Morgana or Merlin seemed to have regained their voice yet, so they simply nodded and allowed her to escort them back into the house and to the two spare rooms across the hall from each other on the second floor that they would be staying in.
It seemed to them that the house was bigger on the inside than it seemed on the outside. Unlike the facade of the building the interior seemed to be made of a pristine white marble rather than the pale wood. There was not a mark or scratch on the marble floor they walked on. Which meant either not many people moved around in or lived in the house, or the marble was very durable. The doors to the rooms they passed like the others they had walked by were draped in the same shimmering fabric. It was only now that they realized that they could not see through the fabric in the dimmer light of the building. Giving privacy once inside.
The rooms themselves on the inside were the mirror images of each other. Both having large beds against a wall with a small washing basin and table next to it and a large window on the parallel wall to the door. It was by far the largest room and bed that Merlin had ever been able to call his own, even if it was for one night. That was unless he choice to stay in Avalon. If he was chosen to rule it. Was that even a possibility. Morgana was the daughter of a king, though she didn't accept the fact. She was also the sister to the current king a fact she did choose to acknowledge. He was a nobody. The son on a dragon lord yes, but to the wider world he lived in he was nothing but the king's servant. That was the wider world though, here it mattered. It made a difference it was a fact, like his magic that he didn't have to hide. That he could be proud of.
What it would mean to truly own who he was for the first time in his life played out in his mind and he moved to look out the window. His window looked out across the lake cloaked in mist. He could still not see much through the mist, especially now the sun had begun to set in the sky. If he stayed, if he ruled then his life would be forever changed. He would not live a lie anymore. He couldn't. He would have to return, to see his mother. He would have to find a way for her to come here. It was not possible, now at least. If he was ruler, then he could change that. He would also have to return to Camelot. It would take some time for Arthur to see him as an equal, but he was sure that they would find a way to work together. Maybe this was how the golden age began and was given a solid foundation. All of this played out rapidly across his mind as he looked out across the lake. Deep down he didn't believe what he was thinking would come to pass. He knew he would not rule Avalon.
Morgana from the first time he saw her had always held herself with a dignified air. Even when she was at her worst, most broken her head had always been held high and her shoulders straight. Just as Arthur had been raised to be king, she had been raised to be queen. It was not in the way that anyone had expected but it seemed to make sense. At least more sense than him ruling, being a king. He wasn't sure if the thought of Morgana as queen with powerful back up was something he should be wary of. If he was, he couldn't muster much worry.
He wasn't sure he had been lost in his own thoughts, but a knock came most likely on the wall next to the doorway and a young woman with dark blonde hair and dark eyes entered the room. She held a tray with a small bowl of soup, silver jug of water and a glass. She smiled at him as she moved to had him the tray.
"Hello Emrys." Her voice was not as lyrical as Caelia's, but it had a musical air to it. "I'm rose."
"Thank you." He said as he took the tray.
"I hope you like it."
"I'm sure I will."
"What do you make of Avalon so far."
Adjusting the tray in his hands he tried to find the right words. "It's breathtaking." And failing too truly express what he thought and felt.
Rose seemed to understand. Was used to people being unable to express themselves in a coherent, descriptive way. "That it is."
"How long have you lived here." He asked trying not to sound as inquisitory as he felt.
Rose had been about to turn and leave but stopped at his question. Like hers to him, she took a little while to think of her answer. "A little over a century." She her tone more of a question than an answer. She gave him a soft smile as she moved to leave again. "I hope you have a pleasant evening. I look forward to talking with you and Morgan le fay tomorrow, but I should bring her, her supper."
Making her excuse she left through the shimmering fabric as quickly as she had appeared. He didn't get a chance to ask her anything else. It had taken him a little by surprise seeing another person. Even though rationally he knew there were others living here. Sitting on the bed as it was the only option, he ate his soup and tried to quiet the thoughts running around his mind. Once he had eaten, he lay back on the bed, closing his eyes he tried to rest a little.
When he opened his eyes again the room was dark with only the faintest light pouring in from the window. He didn't know how long he had been asleep, but he was glad he had been able to find any rest that night. He knew though that he would be unable to find any further rest right now. pulling himself slowly to a sitting position, he further pushes himself to stand up. He didn't know what made him move, but without much thought he left the room and in one wide stride he crossed the corridor and knocked on the wall next to Morgana's doorway. He was able to wait a few seconds with Morgana not making any reply, before he walked through the doorway.
Morgana sat by the window; her legs pulled into her chest in an almost childlike way he didn't know her to be capable of. The window in Morgana's room looked out onto the back of the house. Looking down onto the bright blue pool. She had tried again to see if she was able to see more of what lay beyond the houses on the shoreline. To the heart of the isle. As the sun began to set, she saw less than before. After eating her soup, she returned to the window and looked out as she tried to process where she was and what was going on. Both of them in slight shock didn't say anything at first. Merlin couldn't find the reason that had propelled him here and Morgana surprised at his appearance, so they looked at each other in silence for a few seconds.
"Merlin." Morgana was the first to find her voice. Saying his name as a question.
Merlin took a little longer to find his again. "I wanted to check you were okay."
Morgana scoffed a little as a small smile crossed her face. "What are you thinking."
Seeing right through him and his excuse. It was such an indirect question. That could mean so many things, but he knew what she was asking about. Letting out a deep breath he slowly, like a weight was on his back moved over to the window where she sat and slumped to the ground next to her. "Where do you want to start."
"Do you want to stay here."
It was the simplest question she could have asked, but it was the one that got to the heart of matter, and he didn't have an answer. "I don't know."
"Me either. I thought I would...but."
"Because Morgause isn't here."
"In part."
He reached out and placed a hand over hers. "I'm sorry."
Morgana turned from him to look out the window again, pulling her legs under her. Removing his hand from hers. to get more comfortable. "I feel calm here...I don't know if that's the right word-"
"I know, I feel the same way." Merlin agreed. Though he couldn't find the right word for it.
There was gentle tranquility to the place that put you at ease. Magic of course must be the main cause of that, but he didn't find it foreboding in any way. There was no negativity to it. Despite the feeling of tranquility there was also an energy to the place. Which was surprising at first when they had not seen anyone else since they arrived apart from Caelia. After they saw the pool connected to the source of magic it made sense. It made him feel alive. Which was strange since he had not realized how much he had been holding back. How detached he was. That he had been just going through the motions. A deep sadness had been building up in him until now.
"What do you think of Caelia and Rose." He asked to distract himself.
"Can we trust them you mean." Merlin nodded. "Yes, I think we can. They are keeping much form us, but they had said they will tell us more tomorrow. I believe them."
A considerate look appeared on his face. "I think so to."
"You can't exactly judge someone for being withholding." Morgana teased.
"Suppose not."
"What will you do." Merlin looked at Morgana, confusion written all over his face. Had she not asked him that question before. "When you rule-"
"You think I'll be chosen." He asked, now understanding her question.
"Haven't you already been chosen." It was slight, but there was a hint of bitterness to her voice.
"What are you talking about." He asked not understanding what she was thinking.
Slowly Morgana turned away from the darkening sky outside the window and back to Merlin. "You're the great Emerys-"
"And you are the last high priestess-"
"You're the hero. The one that was destined to bring about the golden aga."
"Morgana-"
"And I am the villain." She simply stated. There was nothing he could think to say. "I'm the darkness to your light. The hate to your love. I am everything that is wrong with the world. Evil."
Merlin scoffed. "You are what you choose to be."
"Let's not drag it all up again. We both know that it's not that simple."
Letting out a sigh he let the matter drop. As much he wanted to believe it wasn't the case, he knew that it was. That as much as they did make their own choices there was, especially was for them some unseen force that impacted the course of their lives. They both had been put into boxes. Expected to behave in a certain way. Be a certain way. They had broken out of those boxes though. He for one was not going to be boxed in ever again.
"We make our own choices." He said firmly meeting her eyes.
It took Morgana a few seconds to understand that he was not simply stating what he wanted to do, he was making a vow. To himself and to her. He was asking her to do the same. With a soft smile she nodded.
"Our own choices." She vowed.
They fell into an easy silence, as they both turned to look out of the window, at the sky that was now dark. The idea of Merlin ruling a kingdom, even one as small as this had seemed to Morgana as impossible as it did to the warlock himself. Now though it did seem as impossible as she first thought. Yes, he was powerful. More so than he himself believed; she was sure. He had never seemed like a leader to her. Not a simple follower, at least not anymore. Seeing him make such a vow, with such certainty, showed that he had more inner will power than she had given him created for. Maybe he could be a leader. One that she wanted to follow, that she wasn't so sure of.
"There is just as much chance that you will be chosen to rule." Morgana turned to him an irritated look on her face. He spoke again before she had the chance. "No one has risked more to change things for our kind than you. You have never been afraid to say or do what you believe is right. You have always protected our kind as best as you could." Morgana rolled her eyes a little and turned away again. "You know more than I ever will about-"
"Merlin please." She said with a sigh, before adding. "Why you stay, if I was chosen."
As with the other questions he had been asked recently he could not find the right answer. While he could see Morgana ruling Avalon and doing a good job. Working with Arthur to rebuild the trust between the two kingdoms. As much as he would follow her lead to that end, he didn't know if he could live here. He was sure that whoever was chosen neither of them would have to break all ties with Camelot, but it was still a life changing matter.
"I think so." He eventually ended up on. "I could never leave Camelot, not fully but, yes I want to see for of Avalon. Learn more." Morgana nodded. "Would you stay if I was chosen."
"Yes." He hadn't expected her to answer so quickly.
It took him a beat to understand. "So, you can search for your mother."
"Yes." Morgana again answered quickly. "But not just for that." She added after a beat.
It was the closest he would get to Morgana saying that not only did she believe he would be chosen to rule Avalon, but that she also believed that he would do a good job at it. It touched him greater than he would let show. For the briefest moment he believed that he would be chosen and that he could do it. His eyes drifted back to the window but were pulled back as he heard Morgana stifle a laugh.
"What." He asked a smile already on his face. "What's so funny."
She shook her head, but Merlin kept meeting her eyes until she answered. "I'm just imaging the look on Arthur's face when he learns of your magic, all you've done for him and that your rule a kingdom."
Merlin couldn't help but laugh himself as he pictured the utter shock and confusion on Arthurs face if he was told all of that. Morgana smiled too as she continued to picture the same image. It would almost be worth Merlin being chosen once again to see it.
They fell into another comfortable silence. Both trying to imagine themselves as ruler and not quit managing to believe in it as much as they believed the other would be chosen. It was a clear night and starts were visible in the sky. The moon though not full cast a bright light. The light poured into the room landing on the witch and warlock. Glancing over at Morgana Merlin thought he saw her skin shimmer a little, like the fabric that blocked the doorways. She fitted here, she made sense here. Just as she had with the druids and how he believed she did in Camelot. That had just been the face she presented to the world he knew now It didn't change the fact that she seemed to be a person that found a way to fit anywhere she ended up. To a degree he did too, but that was by fading into the background.
He had thought that she looked Beautiful the first time he had seen her. Looking out of her window at an execution that she had to turn away from on his first day in Camelot. That night he felt sure that she was not just beautiful but was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. The way she had glided across the hall. Everyone looking at her. She seemed so confident and comfortable. To him she seemed otherworldly. Someone from a different world than him. One that he would always view at a distance. To his surprise he not only found that they fell into each other's orbit regularly he also quickly had grown comfortable around her. Comfortable enough to look like an utter fool in front of her on a number of occasions. Someone that she ended up trusting. Maybe more than she should have. Despite her beauty and status, he never felt as if she believed herself better than him or anyone else. Maybe Uther or Arthur at time, but never because of her station. Gwen while technically her maid was also her closest friend and now would be her sister.
Looking at her now in the moonlight, that made her skin shimmer. In a place they both felt so comfortable in, where they were equal. She looked stunning. It caught him off guard at first and he felt his breath catch in his throat. She looked so relaxed, at peace. It was a look he was not sure he had ever seen on her face before. Like a lightning bolt of the clear blue sky a fact suddenly became clear to him. He was in love with Morgana. He always had been.
Feeling his eyes on her Morgana turned to face him again. "Why are you looking at me like that."
For a few seconds he could only make an um sound, as Morgana searched his face in the pale moonlight. Suddenly he couldn't speak in front of her. "Nothing." He finally managed to get out as he practically jumped to his feet. "it's getting late-"
Morgana reached out and grabbed his hand before he could walk away. "Thank you for coming with me." Looking down at her he nodded and moved to talk away, but she held his hand tighter. "You're a good friend."
"Friend." He asked not sure he had heard her correctly. "Yes Merlin. You're my friend."
Arthur's words rang around his head. "She can't be your friend, let alone anything else." He knew Arthur was talking about himself and Gwen than Merlin and Morgana, but the point was still the same. The king was wrong about both. Gwen would soon he his wife and Morgana was Merlin's friend. On the last part though Arthur was right. She would never be anything more.
Hope you liked it. I know that it was another chapter mostly with just a lot of talking. I just wanted to make sure that I explained everything clearly. If something doesn't make sense than please let me know. I'm really not sure I've done a good job of explaining, setting everything up correctly.
I also wanted to focus a little more on Merlin and what he's thinking. I feel like I've not given enough time to him. I would really like to know your feelings about this development. Does it feel rushed. I know a lot of people have been patiently waiting for this and, while not a lot has happened, something had changed, and I hope you like it.
While I do know who is going to rule Avalon, I would still really love to hear from you. What your thoughts are about it. who should rule and why.
As always, any other comments or ideas, feedback you have is always very welcome.