Letting go was going to be one of the hardest things he had done that day. Rene had shared more with him in the last few centons than he thought she ever had. He wanted to hold her for the rest of the night and for at least five cycles more so she knew how much he appreciated her trust in him, but each time he looked in her eyes, he couldn't deny Jake was right. Her pupils didn't look right. The bruise and swelling on her face was beginning to block the view of her right eye. He loved her, and that meant that in a way she was his ward. She was under his care and protection. It was the duty he signed up for and should be at the top of his to do list.
"Okay sweet lady, I need to get my uniform back on and start on that list of duties."
She didn't speak, just nodded and started to disengage from his arms, but he held on just a moment longer as he whispered, "Thank you. I didn't think you would tell me."
There was the shrug, a signature of the Copper Squadron, that meant nothing and everything. "I do love you," she said, like he didn't know.
"I love you too. And I'm sorry that sometimes that means I am going to look out for you, make you eat your primaries, get some sleep, and tend to black eyes. It's because I love you. You'd do the same for me."
The shrug again. Close enough to an acknowledgement.
He pulled away, reaching for a towel again, wrapping it tight, seeing that she was also wrapped in one before opening the door. He expected to find Bojay and Jake still there, doing lords know what, while he was fracking with his wife in the turbo. He was unsure what to say, but when the door opened, it was the familiar sound of Jake's guitar that greeted was gone. Seated at the table, an ambrosia glass in front of him, the bottle half gone, Jake was plucking away at some song.
"So, she chose both Fraking and fighting this time. He did hit her good." Jake looked up, the words sarcastic, but there was no grin on his face. "Bojay headed home, said you can find him there when you want to talk. I got a description from him. Sounds an awful lot like Agenor. You sure she killed him?"
"She shot him and some other guy in the face, full power. It sure looked like he was dead. But we didn't have time to check for pulses," he said, pulling out a uniform for himself and rummaging for something for Rene.
Jake got up, opened a drawer beside Starbuck, pulling out civilian clothes for her. "More comfortable. She hasn't modified a uniform yet."
Jealousy flared to life once again, as much as Starbuck despised it. The fact that Jake knew Rene better than himself was always going to be a thorn in his side. "He's just had more yahrens with her than you," he thought as he took the bundle of clothes. "Jake, I need you to gather up the squadron. I have some news, nothing to do with all this, but it's different intel and I need everyone's input. See if people can get off duty early or find someone to cover. As many as possible."
"Aye Aye Captain," Jake said, probably one of the first times he didn't sound salty when he said it. "I heard the rumor from Cassie who heard it from the Doc that we might be staying on the Galactica."
"Yeah, I'm working on that. The televised sealing is backfiring on me. That kid Rene's carrying now belongs to the whole damn fleet."
"Let's hope it looks like you, and not Dante," Jake said.
Starbuck ground his teeth wanting to bite at the young man and his dark humor, but by the look on Jake's face, he wasn't joking. Starbuck just couldn't deal with that right now. It was going to be Starbuck's child regardless of the looks. He had come to believe from his yahrens in the Colonial Child Care System and watching his friend Apollo with Boxey, he who raises it, gets to claim it. By Lords, he was going to look out for this kid until the day he died, his blood or not.
"Well at least mine will be handsome. If the baby comes out looking like you, the IFB won't want the pictures. Too scary for the seniors and guaranteed to stop a pacemaker at first glance." He used humor to let Jake know it was not a subject he wanted to discuss, not now with everything else on his docket for the day. Maybe not ever. It was his.
Jake laughed sarcastically. It was forced, but he'd got the message. "I'll go get everyone."
"In the meantime, I'm running Rene by the life center. You might be right on the concussion. And I'm making her file a report."
"That's not a good idea, the report I mean. The repercussions will be worse than the hit, trust me."
"Maybe you're right, and like I told Rene, you can say 'I told you so' if you are, but I'm your Captain and we are playing it my way until it goes your way. Then, we can discuss impulsive decisions and violent endings. Plus, the guy who hit her might already be there. There was a lot of blood. Definitely a wound that is going to need to be handled. Gather everyone up, make sure the kids are safe."
Jake didn't have a reply for him other than, "Right, gotcha,". Starbuck had been prepared for snotty, surly, sarcastic anything other than agreement. Was it progress? He wished he could think it was, but he knew better. The Rats agreed to your face, and did what they wanted behind your back. His proof was in the way the young man was taking the time to put away his new guitar in its case before following his request.
Shaking his head, Starbuck tried to remember he'd won twice today Just two, but they were both large pots with Rene trusting him enough to share, and Brody's death couldn't be blamed on a Rat. "Take the wins and leave the table when you think you'll lose," he reminded himself.
Once in the turbo, he and Rene dressed in silence, picking up sodden clothes from the floor and putting everything in the recycler except the blood stained coveralls which Rene left soaking in the sink.
Jake was gone when they entered the main room of their quarters. Without her friend there, it made it easier to get Rene out the door to the Life Center. That and also reminding her that Doctor Salik would have something she could take for the headache that had her wincing at the bright lights. Before walking out the door, he checked his lazer, making sure it was set to stun, and leaving it at the ready. He shouldn't need it, but Rene should have been able to walk a corridor without being knocked out. He kept a hand on her shoulder the whole way. He thought about breaking the silence, but Rene was coiled tight under his hand, her head swiveling, looking for danger. He chose not to distract her. At least half of the warriors they passed were not people he knew. Those he did steered clear of the two of them. "Word travels faster than a viper launch," he reminded himself, having been in the past the guy you could count on for the gossip of the day.
It really wasn't his lucky day as whoever Rene stabbed had found some other way to deal with the wound. The Life Center was empty except for Doctor Salik on duty. The doctor quirked an eyebrow at the sight of Rene's face, before casting an accusing glare at Starbuck. It took Starbuck a moment to realize that the doc thought he was to blame.
"It wasn't me." He removed his hand from Rene, taking a step back. "A random attack in a corridor."
"Is that so?" Salik narrowed his eyes. "So it won't be a problem if I ask you to step outside this Life Center and let me talk with the Lieutenant."
"Not a problem. I would rather not, but I understand."
The words seemed to satisfy Salik, removing the accusing evil eye before he asked Rene what she preferred.
"I'd rather neither of us be here if that's alright with you," was her answer.
"Care to tell me what happened?" Salik asked her.
"She was attacked in a corridor by someone. They'd been waiting and ambushed her." Starbuck answered first, before realizing he should have let Rene speak. His oversight put the glare back in Salik's gaze.
"Captain, wait here. Lieutenant, in my exam room."
Rene followed slowly. Once in the room, Salik shot Starbuck another glare, before changing the window to opaque, blocking his view.
He didn't appreciate being the first one accused of hitting his own wife, but he'd had a temper in the past. He suspected Salik wouldn't be the only one who would accuse him of the marks on her face. One's past had a nasty way of sneaking up on you, he mused remembering all the times Apollo had tried to get him to deal with his anger. Now he wished he'd listened to him.
"Listening, not really my thing is it? It needs to be now." Mentally he added it to the top of his ever growing list of things that needed to be handled. He might not be able to make much success on the other obligations, but certainly he could manage himself, or so he thought.
Paye came out of another exam room, startling him, and Starbuck realized maybe the Life Center wasn't as empty as he thought.
"Hey doc, did anyone come in, say with a stab wound?" he asked.
Paye shook his head. "No, and I wouldn't know if they had. I've been busy with an autopsy."
"Brody?" Starbuck asked, feeling a bit queasy at the idea of the body lying just in the other room. One advantage of being a pilot, you didn't often have to see the dead. He swallowed hard at the memory of carrying Apollo's cooling corpse. Thank the lords he was wrong and Apollo was still with him.
Paye nodded. "Report will be on your desk in the morning. Initial findings were conclusive. Loss of atmosphere control in his viper. Pretty simple, just going over it to be positive. Space is unforgiving in the face of laziness."
Starbuck agreed, wishing not for the first time that the Cylons were still their reptile ancestors and not machines. Or was it bugs? No one was clear on how they started, only how it was going, machines that needed minimal atmosphere, able to operate until they ran out of fuel, rusted or were blasted from the sky. But they were dumb and if they weren't machines, then the vacuum of space might have killed them all. Instead it just took out dumb humans..
"What brings you here?" Paye asked.
Starbuck settled on a simple reply of "Rene was in a fight. A black eye and possible concussion that needs to be looked at. Probably it was someone who blamed her for Brody's death."
Paye nodded sagely. "Most people don't deal well with death. They want to affix blame and sometimes, there is no one to blame but bad luck. It will pass once they realize this was not personal."
Starbuck sure wanted to hope so, but as Rene emerged from Salik's office, the swelling on her face down enough so she could see, but the bruise an even more vibrant purple than before, it felt pretty damn personal.
"Only two more pills tonight, and not at the same time, you got that?" Salik ordered Rene. "Captain, see that she gets some rest and checks in with me tomorrow. She's off duty for a few days until she can pass my vision test without guessing. That means all duties, including watching your toddler army. Got it?"
"Yes sir," Starbuck replied, wrapping an arm around Rene, but she stepped away from him once he made contact, her feet still heading for the door.
"Besides that eye, she does have a concussion so I will obviously be filing a report. Security will be finding you later to get the relevant details. Her mind is already scrambled. but you need to wake her up every few hours to make sure it doesn't get worse. If it gets to the point where she starts stuttering or deteriorates in any way, you bring her back, understood?"
Starbuck uttered the yes sir, but his attention was on Rene who wasn't waiting for him. He hurried to follow her, putting a hand on her shoulder to hold her up. She was even more tense than before. She had never liked the Life center, and since Caprica, well, he didn't blame her.
His hand did not stop her as she headed for the corridor with Salik still talking.
"Sorry," he uttered, before turning to catch up with Rene. She was laser focused on putting distance between herself and Life Center.. He waited until they were in the lift before he spun her around, checking out the regeneration repairs done to her face, and getting a good look at her eyes, thankful he was able to see both of them. "You okay?"
"What are my options?" she answered sarcastically.
"I'll take that as a no. You want me to drop you off at our quarters?"
"I heard there's a big meeting I need to attend."
Nodding, he turned away. It had been a hades of a day, for both of them. There was no point in trying to make it better, that wasn't going to happen, so he chose to focus on doing what needed to be done. "Hopefully tomorrow will be quieter. Shorter maybe?" he thought, trying to muster up his usual optimism. "Talking with the Rats will go well and Rene and I can have that date and. . ." He sighed audibly, a sound that made Rene's head snap to him. Was it anger or concern in her look? "If she's not angry now, she will be when I deliver my news."
As the lift doors opened, and they moved down the corridor to the Council chambers, he decided he needed to give Rene a preview of what he knew, hoping she'd be on his side and they could face the Squadron as a united front. They followed her lead, not his. He reached for her shoulder, halting her steps.
"We don't know if the ship we've spotted in front of the fleet is ours or Cylon. Either way, we aren't doing much about it and it has me worried. Apollo is going to go take a look, but without us. We're not moving to the Zakar."
"What? Why? We are all packed up and have signed transfer requests." she didn't look upset by the news.
"It was decided by Command. Seems I'm the only sealed officer and our the celebrity sealing is improving fleet morale." He placed a hand on her belly. "They want you and the baby safe and it was deemed that would be on the Galactica. Now that you are working with Peryton and Wilker, we are needed here."
She looked down to his hand nodding.
"I know you guys don't like it here, but," he hesitated trying to think of a place they might like. It wasn't the Zakar either. Dilmun maybe? No, that was a fantasy created by Dante for Adama. Dilmun for the Rats had been duties and dirt. Where then? Rene and her friends hadn't even been happy on Caprica. The only place he knew they were happy was partying on the Eagle Bash. If they weren't all warriors, that could be an option, but it was an unarmed vessel, just a converted cargo ship, vulnerable to attack. The truth was that what they really wanted, some place with sunlight and safety, hadn't been found yet.
"It is the safest place for now," he said and was relieved when she nodded in agreement.
"Makes sense. But we have to give up the Councilman's quarters don't we?" she asked.
"I have a plan. I just really want you onboard with it. I need you to trust me."
She nodded again, but she looked away and he didn't know how to read her. She sighed before looking back to him, placing her hand on his that was still on her belly. "We could convert the brig here. They don't use it much."
"That's the gal I need, looking for solutions," he thought to himself, not sure why he didn't speak the words aloud.
"We just need room for the kids," she added in resignation. "You and I, we can find other places to be alone."
"I know the kids are a priority. But you and me alone, I'm not willing to give that up just yet. Jake is going to have to find somewhere else to bunk for a while. Not far," he quickly added to the sharp look she gave him. Mentioning Jake's return to the barracks was not going to be received well. "Just not in the same room every night. We could move to Apollo's old quarters. There's still a couch for Jake, and a room for us. Deal?"
"Yeah, or we all could take over some quarters. I don't even like us as spread out as we are now."
He tried not to sigh in defeat. Packed in tighter wasn't what he was going for, but gazing at the purple bruise on her face, he could see where there might be strength in numbers. "Tinia is letting us keep her quarters. There's a couple of rooms there, plus a big main room. We could put all the kids in the main room, We take one, Crius and Lisbet in one. Nik and Darra need somewhere, as do Gilies and Maia, but that still leaves Jake, Max, Alex, Ajax back in bunk rooms.'
"Our quarters or Apollo's or," she hesitated, evaluating him for a moment before she continued. "You could ask Adama. He doesn't use half the space he has."
"You're serious? Rene," he warned, but her eyes narrowed and he didn't want a fight, not now. "Okay, you have a point. See, I'm listening. We can ask and yeah, if you're working with Peryton, he might give you anything you want. But you have to ask, not me."
"Deal."
He shook his head, not believing for a moment that she would make the request. She'd figure out a way to trick Adama, or coerce him into asking the Commander. Lords help him, he would probably do anything she asked right now.
"Okay," he gave up. "We have a plan. Let's go tell the others."
She let him wrap his arm around her shoulders and they entered the council chambers together, a united front. The room was loud, as Jake hadn't let him down, all of the squadron was present, a minor miracle, including Giles and Jolly who had joined Boomer as new additions to the Copper Squadron. The kids were sitting on the floor, eating something resembling dinner. He supposed he had Boomer to thank for that. Around the table the chairs were taken mostly by those who were Colonials originally from the Galactica, while the Rats were lounging on the stairs to the viewport with plates in their laps. That needed to change before he began the meeting. His seat at the head of the table was empty. He guided Rene to it, telling her he'd get her something to eat. On his way back, he was pleased to see he didn't have to say anything as Jolly relinquished his seat next to Rene for him, and Giles got to his feet so he could continue his conversation with Jolly. Starbuck waved Crius and Jake over to the empty chairs. Nik followed as did Dara. Crius made room for Lisbet in the chair beside him. Jason planted himself on the arm of Rene's chair, not wanting to be left out.
Starbuck waited until Rene had taken a few bites before he wolfed his own meal down. He'd hoped it would give him some energy, but instead it made him realize how tired he was. It had been a rough couple of cycles with a long range patrol, an aching back, a full command meeting that felt like being in a room of poisonous snakes, then a pilot death and an assault on his wife. If only this meeting could wait, but it wasn't often he was able to get all the Rats in one place.
"Hey, I need to talk with all of you," he raised his voice, but it was Crius who got their attention with a sharp whistle that silenced the room, including the kids. Boomer and Jolly found seats farther down the table. Giles, Alex and Max remained standing, crowding in between chairs. The table was full.
"Thanks, Crius. So there's been some changes as of today. We are not going to the Zakar." He waited for them to object or to ask why, but no one spoke, letting him know it might be old news. "And we are going to vacate some quarters. We get to keep these chambers in the evening, but we are losing them during the day. We'll have to keep them cleaner. We are losing the Councilman's quarters, all but one. I think we can request Apollo's quarters, two sleeping chambers and a main room, but we may have to fit two couples in there. You bachelors are going to have to go back to the barracks. I am going to ask for our own barracks, but with the new Cadet training, I'm not sure where that will be or if it will happen. And," he paused, trying to think. Their lack of protest was disconcerting. "I think that's it."
"We've bunked in tighter quarters before Buckaroo," Crius replied before looking around the table. "We'll work it out. We can partition the rooms we have, make two out of one. You didn't need to get us together just for that. What else?"
"Rene was attacked. I am following the advice from," he paused, not wanting to say Sewer Rats. Adama was right. It was time to bury that moniker and add some respect to his people. "Crius and Rene. I want someone originally from the Galactica escorting the others. Never travel alone. If you can't find anyone, you call me. I'll be there or get someone I trust to be there. We have made some enemies. I don't want anyone going anywhere alone, that means even me and Boomer, but especially the gals. That goes for you too Jason. I expect you to see that Lara and the kids have more than one escort. Teamwork, understood?"
Heads nodded around the room, and Jolly added that he'd make up a schedule and assign details.
"Thanks. That's it for the news." He reached for his mug that someone had filled with ambrosia, taking a long swallow, debating if he should go forward. But he remembered back to the meeting amongst the commanders of the fleet, and the running tally of allies that he couldn't verify. He set his mug down.
"I want you to tell me about the fleet, this fleet. Not the old one I used to know, but this one with the added ships and warriors. I am here to listen."
The table erupted, but not with voices. The Sewer Rats began flashing hand signs back and forth, the conversation furiously fast and heavily punctuated with offensive gestures. He couldn't follow all of it, just that there was some disagreement on what to tell him. He was dizzy trying to follow the flow, and concerned that it all seemed to be aimed at Rene.
"Guys, he's sitting right here!" Crius hissed at them, but it had no effect as hands flew, and now voices raised. Ajax was calling loudly for Rene's attention while Max hollered, "Hades no, look, look!" while flashing something complicated.
He reached for Rene, to try to tell her that they didn't need to go through her, but she shook off his hand barely looking at him as she was flashing her own signs back. It wasn't signals that they should trust him. He reached for her hands, trying to stop her replies to her friends, but she pulled them back, flashing him a rude gesture. He held up his hands in a motion for her to stop, halt, listen. She shook her head no and went back to signing to Jake.
"For Frak's sake," he muttered, catching half of what Jake flashed back about Colonials being either astrum wipes or pieces of mong. "Jake, seriously? Rene, come on, I'm willing to listen."
No one paid him any attention, and he flashed his own rude hand gesture in frustration.
Crius's sharp whistle cut through the air before he shouted again, "Guys, seriously, he knows your language!"
"No, it's okay, Crius. I'll solve the problem. You can have a conversation without me. You usually do anyway!" He got up, grabbing his dish before reaching for Rene's, then slamming Crius's and Jakes on the stack. He heard Rene's cautious, "Starbuck?" but he was too angry to speak.
He stalked into the food prep area dropping the dishes into the sink with a crash. He'd promised to listen. They still didn't trust him and dammit, it stung. He picked up the top dish and flung it at the wall in frustration.
He heard boots scrambling in response to the crash. He turned to find Crius, Boomer and Jolly in the doorway, flanked by Jake and Nik. Rene had to slide herself under all their arms to squeeze through the doorway.
"Starbuck?" she asked.
"I am fracking tired! It has been one equine's astrum of a day and all I'm asking for is you to tell me what you see, how fracking hard is that?" His voice reverberated in the small room rattling the silverware.
It was a long pause before Crius answered him. "No, not that hard, They were just debating where to begin Bucko."
He spun away from the sink to them. "Don't lie to me! I get it, I do. You've all gotten a raw deal most of your life, and I'm not delivering on what I promised, but, for Sagan's sake. . ." He turned back to the sink, muttering curses; he just didn't have the energy to shout anymore. "I give up. I just give up."
He felt a hand on his back, turning to find Rene at his side. "No one is blaming you. Crius is right, we're just trying to figure out what to tell you. We're ready to talk."
"Don't do me any favors," he sniped back, regretting the words as soon as Rene removed her hand and cocked her head at him.
"Oh we won't. You want the truth, you're going to get it." She turned away, motioning for the others to clear out of the doorway.
One by one, they left, except for Boomer. "I don't recommend temper tantrums," he said, "but at least you have their attention."
"Sometimes you have to talk in their language," he muttered as he bent to pick up the pieces of broken plate, making sure he had gotten all of them in the trash before he headed for his seat, the one at the head of the table that Rene had vacated for her usual one beside it.
The room was quiet as he took his seat, reaching for another long swallow from his drink before he spoke. "I'm listening. Tell me about this fleet."
He was surprised that Nik was the first to answer. "Don't trust Colonel Mars."
Crius quickly dove in, something Starbuck suspected his new wingmate had done often in the past, interceding to save the Rats from Dante's wrath. He had been the top ranking Colonial when they were on Dilmun, the Captain of the group. He'd held them together back then, got them through hades. Starbuck didn't like the idea that Crius felt he had to save Nik from him. But old habits died hard, he reminded himself. The Rats had a way of doing things and he'd promised he would try to accept that.
"What he means is, Mars loves power. He was hoping Dante would give him the Galactica, but he was willing to have the Zakar as a consolation prize. Mars was totally on board with killing off your Commander and Colonel to get the crew to capitulate. I would bet all my cubits that he will take over before we reach Earth. He won't be a bad leader as long as you fall in line. But he is old school with his discipline."
Nik interrupted Crius, guessing at what Starbuck really wanted to know. "Not as bad as Dante. He's not a bonebreaker, but he likes the power of the lash. On the good side, he's not a rapist. We thought for a while he might like guys, but nope. He gets off on ordering people around. He didn't force himself on anyone, but he will take what is given and he did follow Dante's lead. He's got some kids that are his."
Crius cut in, once again trying to clarify Nik's words. "He follows orders and the chain of command. Dante ordered kids, so he made kids. He never went rogue. He would question Dante sometimes, but he carried out every order given, even if he didn't agree with it. He and Dante were close."
Starbuck waited until he was done before speaking. "Anyone sleep with him?" Starbuck asked, not moderating his words. He wanted the naked truth even if he was talking about getting naked.
"No," Rene answered. "He likes Colonials. He barely gave us a look. We were beneath him, but not, you know, beneath him."
"Good. Might make some things easier. And now that Dante is gone, do you think he will follow Adama?"
Nik shrugged. Starbuck looked at Crius, who also shrugged, before saying, "He's Colonial so he might, but he ignored some of Dante's officers, and just followed Dante's lead."
"Okay, good to know. What else?"
It was quiet for a moment, and Starbuck thought he was going to have to cajole them into adding more when Jake spoke up. "It sucks being a civilian in the fleet."
Heads around the table nodded. Starbuck tried not to audibly sigh, instead trying to stay objective. "Can you elaborate on 'it sucks'?"
"Yeah, I can elaborate. Piscine in a barrel." Jake's sarcasm was thick. His words let Starbuck know that all of Jake's forays into the fleet weren't about resigning and becoming civilian. Rene had been pretty adamant that being a pilot was the only option for the Rats. Jake's words helped him to understand why. The Rats were not keen on being defenseless.
Starbuck flipped Jake a handsign that meant in any language to go on.
"People don't get off their ships much and if not for the IFB they wouldn't have any entertainment. They work and eat, and that's it. Not much of a life. Most haven't breathed fresh air since the destruction."
"How many ships have you been on?" Starbuck was curious as he'd lost track of Jake's forays into the fleet.
"Until being jumped on the Celestra, forty six. There's over 200, but most are small and hard to get to. The people are terrified. They don't get word of attacks until the attack is over or their ship gets hit. They're unarmed and defenseless. Oh and lots of plant vapors and sedatives are floating around. If you want to sleep from now until we find earth, that's totally possible."
"That's concerning," Boomer commented.
"But understandable," Jolly interjected. "You don't want an uprising or a riot on a small ship. It could get ugly real fast. You want to keep the passengers sedate and calm. It's amazing that they don't just pipe it through the air circulation system in the passenger areas."
"Can it, you two, I'm just listening. Fact finding mission," Starbuck snapped, as he tried to absorb the implications of what Jake had revealed. Jolly was right, it made sense, in a "I want to keep control" kind of way. A way Dante might have done things. "Jake, other than lack of news and ability to move around, can you be more specific on what it means that it sucks? Are we talking like having Dante as a Commander sucks or something else?"
Jake nodded, thinking before he flashed a couple of hand signs to Rene.
"No!" Starbuck snapped. "Out loud, your observations. No judgments, I just want to know."
"Fine! I just don't know how to say it, okay? Yeah, on some ships people get bossed around, others, no one seems to be in charge so nothing gets done. I don't know how to explain it. Rene, a little help?"
It was Lisbet that chimed in, much to everyone's surprise. "There's no choice in your job. You get assigned tasks to keep the ships running, but it's not always to the person who can do it best. There's just not much to do and the kids are running wild in the corridors. People don't have much hope that this is going to turn out well and," she slowed, blushing before continuing, "Everyone has lost someone. Some ships are like going to a funeral. Some it's like they're just waiting to die."
"Like they're ghosts themselves," Nik added.
Starbuck nodded. It made sense. "Lack of control of their lives, is that it? And grieving?" He looked to Rene to double check if he'd gotten it right.
"Yeah," Rene answered. "They aren't given a lot of opportunities to improve the situation. A common phrase heard on the ships, 'It is what it is.' They're grateful they've been saved, but I think they know it's going to be a long time before they get to where we are going. At this point, they're starting to wonder if living like that is going to be worth whatever it is we find on Earth. Whenever that is."
"And then we joined the fleet," Max added. "There was an influx of hope. But so far no one has been able to get onto any of Dante's ships. The shuttles only run from those ships to here and they aren't regular paid shuttle runs. You can't catch a ride from here to the Zakar or the Shiva without having business and a pass."
"Wait, what? But you can get from the Zakar to the Rising Star. We've run into pilots there," Starbuck looked to Rene for confirmation.
She nodded. "Yeah, but they come to the Galactica first and you can't get on the shuttles to their ships."
Max continued. "I have tried to check on friends but I can't get to them. If on a patrol and you have a problem, they will let you land. But you can't just take a viper over. Bigger fleet means traffic control. "
"That's concerning." Boomer said, sharing a look with Jolly. "I think we should include Adama in this part of the conversation."
The room grew quiet and Starbuck wanted to slap his friend. "Boomer, I promised I would listen. Just listen. It's an intelligence mission. If they want Command involved, that's up to the Rats."
"I'm part of the Copper Squadron now. Don't I get a vote?" Boomer countered.
He had a point. Starbuck looked to Rene to see how she felt about Boomer's suggestion about including Adama, but she was looking to Crius who groused, "I'm not in charge anymore, they are. I don't even know why I'm here." Crius started to get up, but Lisbet pushed him back down.
"That stops now!" Starbuck's shout silenced the room, holding enough tone of command that half the toddlers started crying. "Frak, sorry," he said, getting up to go to the kids, but Rene reached a hand to halt him.
"Jason, go take care of that will you?" she said.
"But, this affects me too," he protested.
"No, it's my fault. He stays. I shouldn't have raised my voice." Starbuck got up to go deal with the kids, but they fled from him into the arms of their parents. For a moment he stood on the stairs up to the stars, looking out on the various ships of the fleet. "Keep it together, Bucko," he said to himself, before turning back to the table. He tried not to take it personally, all the scared little faces looking at him.
Once seated in his chair, In a calmer voice, he began again. "We are all part of a squadron, and we'll follow a chain of command sometimes, but you're all Lieutenants, equal rank and I'm the Captain. Sometimes I get the final say. But we're also a family and everyone has a vote, well everyone over the age of ten. We are going to have to work this out amongst ourselves. I promised to listen, and if anything leaves this room, we'll have a vote. It's unanimous or it doesn't happen, first ground rule, agreed?"
Boomer shook his head, but he seemed to be the only one as others nodded. Starbuck continued, "First vote, nothing leaves this room for now, out loud, aye or nay?"
When put to the majority of the room, Boomer agreed with the others. "That's settled. What more should I know?" Starbuck looked around the table, but by the looks on the faces of the younger pilots, the discussion was over. He waited, determined to drag the silence out until someone became uncomfortable and spoke. But these were the Rats, and normal tactics didn't work on them and the silence continued for more than a centon.
"Okay, so mind if I ask a few questions?" he asked, when it was obvious no one was going to speak. No one objected.
He appraised Rene on one side of him, and Jake on the other. He had more than a few questions for the two of them, queries that might be best asked when alone in the quarters he'd been sharing with the two. He'd wait until then to bring up Jason and his request to join the pilot training, and to also ask why had Jake been visiting ships in the fleet as if it were some secret mission.
He suspected those were going to lead to an argument, and he'd rather lose that one without an audience. He'd stick to questions all the Rats might know the answers to or at least have opinions on.
"Can anyone tell me about Thales? And the others in command too, Rayden, Asardin and Haban?"
The room remained quiet for a moment, Crius opening his mouth to speak, but Starbuck cut him off, turning to Rene. "Thales said his son spent time with you and Jason. Tell me what you think of him?"
Rene shook her head, shifting to remove Kiff and Kalea from her lap, setting them back on their feet as she pushed her chair back. "I think Jason can answer better," she said as she got to her feet and began moving away from the table.
"Rene, where are you going?" Starbuck reached for her, "I'd like you here for this."
As she looked down at him, he noticed her eyes were glassy and distant and he thought better of holding onto her. She'd had a worse day than he had.
"Pills kicked in," she mumbled to him. "Lights are too bright, and I only know Dante." She motioned with her head to the darker corner of the room next to the viewport. With a nod of his head, he acknowledged what was essentially a request, that she sit this meeting out. Watching her retreat, he figured the others would follow her lead and begin to bow out of the discussion.
That wasn't the case as Jason took her seat and began to tell him what he had learned from Thales' son Tmolus.
"The Zakar found them right after we were rescued from Caprica. I didn't really get to know Tmolus until we were on Dilmun. He had a wicked story of Dante meeting with his dad on the Sabre and being all friendly until suggesting a meal with family. Then before the meal was finished Dante had drawn weapons, held a blaster to Tmolus's head and threatened to kill him. His dad believed Dante would and gave him everything he wanted. Tmolus was pissed at his dad for giving in so quickly, until he figured out after the Cheetah and the Shiva, that Dante really wanted to shoot him. Dante normally shot first, and asked questions later."
The story matched with what Starbuck thought probably happened, no surprises there. "So I can count on Thales to follow Adama's lead?" He looked to Crius for confirmation, but there was the shrug again. "Dante used him as bait for the Cylons. Kept his son on the Zakar while he sent Thales to the rear. The man survived all that. He's a good tactician, but he's also a believer in military protocol. You comply and you're okay. You fall out of line, he won't try to deal with you. He sends you to Dante and his lackeys. Apologizes afterwards like that fracking mitigates the pain of a laser whipping. He was strong when dealing with Cylons, weak when it came to Dante."
Starbuck thought for a moment, trying to match up the man he'd met that morning with the story. It was Boomer that put a voice to his own thoughts.
"So we should expect him to follow Adama, maybe gain some strength in having more support and more modernized Colonial Creed regulations."
"That's the hope," Starbuck admitted. "Can't really blame him for following Dante's orders in order to keep his own kid safe. What about the others?"
Shoulders shrugged around the table, and Max spoke. "Dante didn't let you off his ships when we were headed for Dilmun. He traveled between them with his lackeys, but we didn't get to know the other crews until Dilmun, and even then we were separated."
Jake added, "Look Starbuck, you need to understand, we were low, really low on the rosters. We had sixteen centaur days, and after that we had kids to feed, a house to be built, and to try to find enough fuel to keep us warm. Then there were the 'other duties as assigned' that often meant more abuse. We weren't trying to get to know anyone that was originally Colonial. We just wanted to be left the frak alone."
Nik nodded along before adding, "We watched others try to form alliances. It never went well. Dante would break them up. He was trying to do that to us. We tried to stay out of sight and out of mind."
Starbuck lowered his voice before asking, "Except for Rene? She formed an alliance with Crius and your friend Kenan. She spent a lot of time with Dante didn't she?"
The mood around the table shifted as everyone grew tense and looked away. Only Jake would look at him, rage firing in the man's eyes, a warning that this was off limits. Starbuck was prepared for the surly reply when it came, or so he thought.
"They didn't exactly exchange pleasantries, Starbuck. He fraked her and beat her. Crius and Kenan lost a lot by being friends with us. Kenan lost his life."
"Right, yeah, I think I understand," he said, unsure what to say, grasping that the meeting was over. "So, uh, anything else?"
The room stayed quiet, and Starbuck struggled to find a way to end on a high note, something he tried to do in his briefings with pilots, but all he could come up with was to ask, "Avery said his people have been helping out. Is that true?"
More shrugs before Lisbet answered. "They have kids and our kids have been put in child care with theirs so we talk some. They've taken the kids when we've needed it at the last minute. They want to know when we are settling somewhere. They don't like being on a ship and I think they are trying to move some of them to the Agro ship, but they are curious about Dilmun."
That made sense to him as Starbuck realized going from the mountains of Caprica to the confines of corridors was not an easy transition. "Do they know that's probably not an option?"
It was Dara that spoke up this time. "Why not? We were able to hold it before and we didn't have a Battlestar."
Shaking his head, Starbuck was reminded that Jake was right, the Rats had been low and out of the know, like most Warriors were of Command decisions. It was something he was trying to correct as he knew that with communication came understanding. When a warrior understood why and where the orders were coming from, they were easier to follow.
"Adama thinks Dante had a deal with the Cylons. You were digging up resources and making vipers, but Dilmun had more resources than were being utilized. We think Dante was supplying the Cylons to keep you all alive. We are predicting that Dilmun will either be completely destroyed when we return, or overrun with Cylons. It's not an option."
"So Earth is the only option?" Crius asked in a voice that sounded defeated.
"No, I'm not saying that. Your system has a lot of habitable planets. We are hoping to go on the defensive and," he hesitated, unsure what Adama's plans were other than finding earth. "I think there might be other options. We aren't sure how long it will take us to get to Earth, but there's no point in settling somewhere just to be wiped out by the Cylons again."
"I'm tired of recycled air," Jake groused.
"You've got kids to think about," Starbuck answered, a usual refrain he'd been using on Jake that only worked half the time he uttered it.
"I am thinking of the kids," Jake replied. "You want yours raised on a Battlestar?"
"No," he thought aloud, "but I want them alive and free of the Cylons too. It's a bad deal, I know, not the best hand we've been dealt, but we are together, we are alive, and fed. No one's being raped or," he hesitated again, wanting to add the word beaten, but that wasn't true lately with two attacks that left some lasting marks on the Rats. "We're together. And I do believe together we can find a way. I'm not a big fan of Avery's people, the whole kidnapping and selling us to Cylons rubbed me the wrong way I guess, but they can be of some use to us. We might want to invite them to dinner some time."
Heads nodded, a good sign, before Jolly spoke up, a datapad in his hand having already worked up a schedule for escorting the kids to school and child care, and warriors to duties. The talk around the table shifted to chores and schedules, a typical meeting of the Copper Squadron, where dice came out to make the hard decisions about cleaning and cooking.
He let the others take over as he spun his chair to look for Rene. She was gazing out the viewport, Kiff in her lap, Kalea, laying on the floor beside them. He watched as Rene brought a fumarello to her lips, catching a whiff of the sweet scent of smoke. It was no doubt one of Jake's blends, half tabac, half something else that he swore just took the edge off of the day. She shouldn't be smoking, but he wasn't going to be the one to say it, not today. He knew he should join her, but he left her alone, waiting until the others were done haggling over chores before he suggested to Jake that they call it a night.
"Want me to take the kids and sleep somewhere else?" Jake asked. Starbuck's plans for the evening had been wildly different when the day began. Now all he wanted was to crawl under some covers and sleep for twenty centaurs.
"No, actually I think we'd both like you there tonight. I have some more questions for you alone if you don't mind."
"I think you need to move in with us tonight," Crius said. "I don't like the idea of you guys down the corridor alone."
"They won't be alone," Jolly answered. "We can shift quarters around in the morning, but I'll be guarding the door tonight. Nik and Dara plus all the kids should be in Crius's quarters tonight, along with Giles and Boomer."
"Good plan, Jolly, but you'll be guarding the door from the inside, not alone on the outside. That would make us all feel better," Starbuck added. "I'll talk with Adama in the morning."
"We've taken over corridors before on the Zakar. Not many come through these because of the Council of twelve. We could add bunks to Apollo's quarters, make it a bunk room, use the corridors as a commons," Crius offered.
"I don't think we're that desperate yet," Starbuck said, not liking the idea of replicating anything the Gutter Snipe's had on the Zakar. "Let me talk with Adama. There might be some solutions we are overlooking. But not tonight. I'm beat, so is Rene, pardon the pun."
His joke fell flat, but it wasn't really a joke. The long cycles were catching up to him. He turned back to gaze at Rene and the view of her holding her kids looking out at the stars. That's where he wanted to be, holding them all close and safe. He gave into the impulse, going to her. He gathered up Kalea in his lap as he wrapped an arm around Rene. She kept her gaze on the stars, but leaned her head into his shoulder. He resisted the urge to mumble an apology for the whole stinking rotten mong filled day, instead kissing the top of her head as he tightened his hold on her.
She read his mind. "I know. It's okay. I've had worse days."
He choked back his own, "I know", instead saying, "Let's get the kids home and we can get some sleep. I'll make sure tomorrow is better."
"I know you will, but Starbuck," she lifted her head to meet his gaze, "none of this is your fault. You've delivered on all your promises to me."
"No, I don't think I have. I promised to protect you and yours and I didn't do that today."
She tried to smile as she shook her head. "You were taking on the Cylons and all the commanders today. You can't do it all, pretty boy."
"Well I intend to die trying." He meant the words and maybe that was what darkened Rene's eyes with worry.
"No, you bloody won't." She gripped his hand hard, her eyes boring into his. "Do you understand me? I can't take that again."