R1 Thursday

When Max opened her eyes and noticed she was back in the RV, she didn't hesitate to shake Chloe awake. When she opened her eyes, she seemed disappointed. "So, you brought me back. ... I have to admit, I was hoping it wouldn't work. ... Are you mad at me?"

"Not at all; it was totally understandable. Chloe, I know it must feel awful being pulled away from that, but rest assured that alt Chloe will be OK with you taking over from time to time."

"It's kind of weird, but I don't feel as bad as I thought I would; it's like part of me is still back there ... but I'd be lying if I said I was fine and dandy."

Rachel's voice suddenly chimed in, although she still looked like she was asleep, "Yeah, I think that sums it up for me too." She opened her eyes and propped herself up on an elbow, looking unenthusiastic. "But I'll feel better after we get out of this town."

Max felt relieved that they were back. "As far as I'm concerned, we can leave right now, but maybe we should clean your room out first since your mom asked."

Chloe visibly cringed as the reality of this reality seemed to seep back inside her head. "Yeah, let's get that over with."

As Max stood up and stretched out, Rachel suddenly looked enthusiastic. "So, you're back to yourself."

Max was confused for a split moment before realizing her legs were working again. Her face lit up with enthusiasm. "I am so going for a run on the beach."

Rachel chimed in, reflecting her enthusiasm, "I'll join you."

After they both dragged Chloe out of bed and convinced her to come, they suddenly realized they weren't at the beach yet, so Chloe quickly drove them back down. In a few minutes, the three of them went out in their pajamas and ran down the coastline together. Max could immediately tell how badly in shape this body was, but she pushed on anyway, encouraging Chloe to keep up. It was chilly this time of year, but her body quickly warmed up from its exertions.

When they got back full of sweat and ready for a shower, Esha and Victoria were sitting in the booth with tea. Max looked at them expectantly. "You guys back?" They both gave a thumbs up, which relieved her.

After the three of them jumped into the shower together for a quick rinse, which was Chloe's idea, they poured out of the bathroom together with towels wrapped around them and sat down in the booth with Esha and Victoria. Victoria looked at them with amusement. "You guys sounded like you had quite the party in there."

Max giggled, feeling like she was ten years old again, "Yeah that was Chloe's fault; she thought it would be a good idea to wash each other with soap, but it turned into a giant tickling battle."

Rachel looked at Victoria playfully. "You should join us next time."

Victoria smirked doubtfully. "I don't understand how you could fit in there; it reminds me of those old videos in the nineties of a bunch of people trying to cram inside a phone booth."

Rachel responded as if on a stage, "It's all about yielding your personal space and embracing the togetherness."

Victoria chuckled, "I guess that makes sense with you guys."

After they sipped their tea for a minute, Chloe spoke up. "So, is it OK if we skip meditation today? We can probably be out of Arcadia before noon if we take care of my room now."

Max looked doubtful. "How many of us are going to help?"

As Rachel lit up, Chloe instantly noticed and looked at her disapprovingly. "Rachel, my step douche will probably be there, and you know how observant he is."

Rachel looked offended as she protested, "Chloe, I miss your room nearly as much as the junkyard, and this is my last chance ever to see it; there is no way in hell I'm not going. Don't worry; I'll wear my full disguise and be discrete."

Chloe shrugged it off. "OK, whatever, whoever wants to help can come."

After they finished their tea and dressed, they drove to Chloe's. When Rachel got in full disguise mode, they headed out and walked across her lawn. As they walked into the house and removed their shoes, Max noticed David come around the corner from the dining room. He stopped and stood there with his coffee, watching them until Chloe noticed him. "Here to clean your room out?"

Chloe responded in an equally indifferent tone, "Yeah."

"OK ... don't forget to leave the key." He disappeared back into the dining room as they headed upstairs, Chloe looking particularly cold now.

When they entered the room, Chloe flopped down on her bed with a sigh, looking particularly dismal, which everyone seemed to notice as they took a seat here and there. Rachel put a sympathetic hand on her leg as she sat on the edge of the bed. "You wanna talk about it?"

Chloe sighed, "Fuck this reality; I can feel it seeping into my brain again like cancer. ... Let's blow this town before I wanna blow my brains out, and yes, Esha, I know it's all in my head along with the need for my father and every other fucking thing."

Esha responded regretfully, "This time, it isn't just in your head, Chloe."

Chloe suddenly looked perplexed. "What?"

"The anger you had for your father was in your head, but you overcame that yesterday to find a genuine metaphysical need. You really do need him; it's not just in your head ... I'm sorry."

The truth in Esha's words made Chloe wince. After a moment, she stood, trying to look indifferent. "OK, I'll make this nice and simple; everything except the flag can go into or beside the trash container outside." As she immediately began tearing down some posters from behind her bed, everyone stood and began throwing things into boxes or bags they could find.

As Esha left with Chloe's old CRT TV, Max opened a dresser drawer and glanced at Chloe. "You want any of these clothes?"

Chloe responded as she unceremoniously threw some junk into a suitcase already half full of beer bottles, "Toss it; I already took the clothes I wanted." As she slammed the suitcase shut, causing one of the beer bottles inside to break, Max looked at her with concern but bit her tongue as she realized it would be better to let her be.

As Chloe left with the suitcase and Rachel and Victoria followed her with more junk, Max hesitantly grabbed Chloe's old laundry bag, which was still full, trying not to think of the smells and things growing inside as she carried it out. When she made her way downstairs and outside, she couldn't help but think how she had imagined this happening differently; that is, more like the last time she tried to clean Chloe's room when they were thirteen. She understood why but couldn't help feeling disappointed.

In only about half an hour, everything but the flag and furniture was gone. As Chloe took down the flag and folded it up, Victoria looked doubtful. "Do we have to haul this furniture out?"

"Nope, we're done." Everyone looked relieved as they followed Chloe out of her room and down the stairs. Before she left, she took out her key and tossed it down the hallway.

By the time they got into the RV, Chloe was in tears but seemed to be trying to fight them back. As she tried to make her way to the driver's seat, Esha grabbed her forcefully yet compassionately held her as Chloe suddenly burst into sobs. After a few minutes when she backed away, Esha looked at her compassionately with everyone else. "Chloe, we may not be a substitute for your father, but we are here for you; we're your family, and there's no need to hold anything back, mushiness and all."

Chloe looked around at them with tears and confusion. "I can't explain it; I feel like I'm losing my mind or something."

"That's understandable after what you've been through. ... Maybe you should sit down and relax a bit before getting behind the wheel."

She silently agreed as they all sat in the booth. After a moment of silence, she looked at Rachel solemnly. "How are you holding up?"

"I don't think the need for my mom is as ... metaphysical as with your dad, but I'm still feeling it. I think the hardest part for me is the loss of my sister; I felt such a strong connection with her, and now that she's literally been erased from existence, I feel ... empty inside, except not a good kind of emptiness like when we meditate."

As Max felt the emotional atmosphere in the room take another nosedive, she began to wonder if bringing them with her was a good thing at all. After a moment of silent dreariness, a remote concern came into Max's head as she looked at Victoria. "Victoria, don't you need to pick up some clothes or whatever? And what about your dorm room? Don't you need to move out since you're leaving?"

Victoria suddenly looked more awake. "Actually, yeah, I do need to pick up some things. As for the dorm room, I can just hire someone to move it out while we're on the road."

Chloe began to get out of the booth. "Might as well drive us there now."

When they arrived, Max and Esha decided to tag along. As they walked through the school grounds, she wondered if this would be the last time she saw this place in this reality. All in all, her time here was pretty short, so she didn't feel very emotionally attached; in fact, just the opposite, given that she saw Chloe shot here two times.

When they arrived at the dorm, it was quiet outside since it was still early, but when they got inside, they ran into Dana and Juliet in the hallway outside Dana's room. Dana exploded with critical delight and literally dragged Max and Esha into the room as Victoria told them she'd get her stuff ready. As they sat on the couch together, Juliet insisted they tell them what was happening, which they did to an extent. Afterward, Juliet looked perplexed. "How in the hell did you manage becoming friends with Victoria and then convince her to drop out of school in her senior year? It just sounds so ... beyond real."

Dana interjected teasingly, "Oh, look who's got a new cliché phrase to use. 'Beyond real' would be a great title for your newspaper."

Juliet replied flippantly, "It can't be cliché if I just made it up; maybe you should spend some time studying instead of replying to three-worded praises from your Facebook page."

Dana pretended not to hear her as she looked at Max and Esha imploringly. "Seriously, what's going on; I'm not letting you leave until you tell; I'll lock you in this room if I have to."

Max responded casually, "Really, we're just going on a road trip and taking some photos. We convinced Victoria it would be better for her career than sitting in a classroom, and now that she's a completely different person, she's kinda fun to have around."

Dana seemed to reluctantly accept the explanation, shifting her gaze to Esha sincerely. "I know this sounds creepy, Esha, but even though we just met days ago, I feel like I've known you so long; it breaks my heart that you're going away now."

Esha looked sympathetic but amused. "It's OK; I get that a lot. I wish I could spread myself out and spend more time here, but the truth is, my life isn't completely in my hands anymore; I sort of go where the current takes me, and right now, it's pushing me away."

After Dana and Juliet gave them tearful hugs and made them promise to keep in touch, they allowed them to go on their way. When they went into Victoria's room, she was packing clothes into a suitcase. They sat on the couch and watched her as she continued folding every piece of clothing with care. "So, I guess I won't need most of my designer shoes, especially if we go to India."

Esha responded casually, "Yes, either sandals or good walking shoes; although I would encourage anyone to walk with bare feet, there are some places it isn't advised because of broken glass or whatever."

"Well, wherever we go to first, I hope it's warm; I have some warm clothes but no heavy-duty coats or anything."

Max responded casually, "No worries, we'll just buy you one if it comes down to it, along with a pair of warm wool socks."

Victoria smirked knowingly. "Oh, that's right, you guys are rich with diamonds. I have to admit, at first, I thought you wanted me along as a cash cow. Esha, where did you happen upon these diamonds?"

"My guru obtained them through his various excursions into the remote parts of the Himalayas. He didn't get into the specifics, but I believe most of them were received as ... charitable contributions, you could say, from people he helped and healed in remote areas."

"Your life there sounds like such a mysterious and unusual experience from the pieces you told me. Do you feel like it's a privilege or more like a burden?"

"That's a good question. At first, when I met and trained with him, it felt most certainly like a burden, but it quickly transformed into a great privilege. Now, especially after experiencing your lives, I feel unworthy yet deeply honored and grateful to have ... what I have."

Max chimed in, "You're going to have to delve more deeply into that story, especially if and when we go to India."

"I'd be happy to, but as I said, most of it is boring."

Victoria glanced at her critically as she continued folding clothes. "Boring is the last word I would use to describe you or anything you've done, Esha."

Max smiled in agreement. "Yeah, Esha, your life is on a whole other level; you just need to learn how to deliver it to people, so it sounds more like ... how it is, which is extraordinary and amazing."

"Eloquence of speech isn't exactly my thing, but I'll do my best."

After a minute, Victoria paused in thought. "Max, do you mind if I use the camera I gave you? I'm hesitant to bring my high-end one, especially if we go to India."

"Yeah, for sure; I probably won't use it much anyway."

"That's understandable; if I had been through that darkroom with Jefferson, I'd probably abandon photography too."

Max was hesitant to bring it up but decided to be honest. "Actually, I know I didn't mention it on the recording, but you were with me."

Victoria looked startled as she stopped folding and looked at Max with frightened eyes. "Do I even want to know what happened?"

"Well, when I first woke in the darkroom, you were tied up beside me and unconscious. When you woke, you were freaked, and ... suffice it to say that we both wouldn't have made it out of there alive if I hadn't gone back and changed things."

Victoria looked at her with reverence. "Then that's two times you've saved my life. Do you even keep track of all the lives you save?"

"Actually, I try my best not to think about it; I don't like seeing myself as some sort of hero."

"Well, putting that aside, there's no doubt that you saved us all from a boring and mundane existence." Max and Esha smiled with amusement as she continued to pack.

Afterward, they left as Victoria wheeled a large suitcase behind her and carried a backpack. Max offered to carry the backpack, but she said she was fine. When they got back to the RV, she promptly put her luggage in the bedroom and joined them upfront, looking nervous. Rachel noticed with everyone else. "You OK, Victoria?"

"Just feeling kind of freaked out from abandoning my life here so suddenly. I mean, I'm positive that what I'm doing is the right thing, especially after what happened last night, but I'm still ... absorbing things, as usual."

Rachel stepped beside her and held her hand. "You're part of the family, Victoria; mind meld or no mind meld, you're part of us."

Victoria looked touched by her words, her eyes becoming wet as she responded sardonically, "Thanks, this is the first time I've been part of a family that had a positive influence on me."

Chloe smirked. "You say that now ... but you may regret it." Everyone laughed as she looked mildly serious. "So, are we ready to go, or is there any other closure we need to deal with?"

Rachel looked as if she remembered something "Do you have a connection that can get me new identification?"

Chloe groaned, "Shit, I forgot about that. Frank used to be my contact for another guy that did that sort of thing. I can try texting him; hopefully, he hasn't thrown away his burner yet." She took out her phone and typed out a text. After sending it, she promptly received a reply. Her face fell as she read it. "Shit, it's just an automated no-service reply; he must have tossed it after he decided he was done, so we're screwed."

Everyone looked in thought for a moment, then Rachel spoke up optimistically. "Maybe if we went to LA or another major city, we could fish around for someone."

Victoria looked skeptical. "Why do you even need a new ID? If you get arrested or something, Max can just rewind and avoid it, right?"

Rachel responded informatively, "True, but if I ever want to have a real life or go to India with you guys, I'll need papers to get a passport or whatever."

Victoria looked enlightened. "Oh ... right."

Chloe chimed in, "Not to mention if Rachel can't go to India, then none of us can, thanks to the proximity thing." After another quiet moment of contemplation passed, she spoke up again. "I guess it's more likely we'll find someone in LA."

Victoria looked skeptical again. "So, let me get this straight: We're going to intentionally find the shadiest parts of LA and ask around for people who can get us fake papers? Is it me, or does that sound like suicide? Or at least a sure way of getting robbed."

Chloe began to look frustrated. "Well, we're open to suggestions if you have a better idea, and it's not like Max can't rewind or come back in time and warn us about something."

Victoria looked conceded. "Yeah, I guess so; I just wish we had a lead of some sort; I mean, you guys convinced me that destiny is real, but this seems more like finding a needle in a haystack."

Rachel responded casually, "Don't worry, Victoria; I've met my share of shady people, and I can usually tell apart the bums from the dealers; in fact, I think you'll be surprised just how easy this will be."

As Chloe started up the vehicle and set off on the road, the others sat in the booth and looked out the window at Arcadia Bay as it went by and faded into the distance. Max could feel a mixture of relief and fear but wasn't sure if it was from herself, the others, or both.

After they went shopping at the supermarket to replenish their food supply and stopped at a station where they could clean out the innards of the RV and replenish the water and fuel tanks, they continued on their way down the highway. As Max and Rachel sorted the food into the fridge or cabinets, and Esha organized the spice rack, Victoria organized the drawers in the bedroom to accommodate everyone's clothing.

While Rachel secured one of the iron frying pans, she smiled at it and glanced at Max. "Thank the gods for Esha's heavy-duty iron pan, aye, Max?"

Max smiled back. "Yeah, I never really thought about it, but if it wasn't for that pan, we would have been screwed."

Esha remarked casually, "I'm sure you would have thought of something."

Chloe commented as she drove, "Yeah, like expanding the fluid inside his body until he exploded, like that guy on Big Trouble in Little China."

Max chuckled, "Oh my god, as bizarre and funny as that sounds, you're probably right; let's just hope I don't do it by accident, like some other things."

As Max placed two large jars of coconut oil in a cabinet, she commented, "So, Esha, you're a fan of coconut oil."

Esha beamed, "Yes, coconut oil is the most supreme and healthy oil, especially for cooking; it's been traditionally used in my country for decades, if not centuries, so my cooking guru taught me."

Rachel inquired, "So, all you did with her is cook and meditate?"

"Yes, cooking through meditation is probably an oversimplified way of describing my time with her, when the fact is that it was a great challenge; not just the cooking, but also the aspect of mantras through the cooking, which enhances its quality and energy vibrations."

Max was curious. "What's a mantra?"

"As far as definitions go, it's just a word or sound that's repeated to aid meditation, but in truth, it can be something much more profound than the human mind can understand. The best example of this is in your own life, Max; you learned mantras from me that I didn't even know I had: When you raised Rachel from the grave, that was a mantra; when you filled the water in the glass, that was a mantra and so on."

Max was fascinated as questions arose in her mind. "But what about reversing time? Where did I learn that mantra?"

"You probably taught it to yourself in a moment of desperation to save your friend; this is rare, but it does happen."

"But every mantra had to start with someone, right?"

"I believe so, although many Hindus believe that some of them came from the gods, and many, including the guru we'll be seeking, would believe that either this power of yours came from a god or that you might even be a reincarnated soul of a god. Personally, I believe that this is a mere trap of the ego, and you shouldn't consider such things, but I would be amiss if I completely dismissed the traditions and beliefs of many of my gurus. To its credit, Hinduism is one of the earth's oldest religions and certainly contains much truth and wisdom concerning many things."

Rachel commented, "Well, I don't have any problem with seeing Max as a god; seriously though, how many people have existed throughout the ages that could do all the things that Max can? And her potential is virtually limitless, as she keeps reminding us."

Chloe chimed in, "Yeah, if the wrong person ever could do what Max can, they would probably be the ruler of the world."

Max felt uncomfortable at the ideas. "I don't see myself like that, and I never want to; rest assured that I won't ever be trying to rule anything. The way I see things now with infinite realities and all, it wouldn't be worth it anyway since it doesn't really mean anything."

Rachel looked curious. "But isn't that an argument you could use to do or not do anything?"

Max paused for a moment in thought, realizing this was true. "Yeah, I guess so."

Chloe chimed in, sounding snarky, "So, what is there left to do if everything doesn't make any difference one way or another?"

Max didn't like this conversation, maybe because she knew it was true and couldn't come to terms with it, despite Esha's guidance. "Look, I just want to live a life that isn't completely defined by my powers."

Esha looked impressed as everyone else looked agreeable with her response. "Well said, Max; it's better not to overthink these sorts of things."

After they finished organizing and cleaning, they sat in the booth and stared out the window as Chloe drove. After a few minutes, Rachel glanced at Victoria. "So, Victoria, everyone has chimed in on our little trip except you; care to get anything off your chest?"

"What else can I say? It's no wonder I turned out the way I did here. If it wasn't for Max's storm, I'd probably still be that person. As for the way I turned out there, I kind of get it, but I still can't see myself being that way by any stretch of the imagination. ... I suppose there's another reality out there where Max is the evil bitch and I'm the innocent and nice girl trying to help people with my powers. ... I think this experience has taught me not to take anything too seriously, which was one of my main issues."

Max was somewhat flattered and amused. "You think I'm innocent?"

"Well, more innocent than I am by a long shot."

Esha chimed in, "Both of you have a certain quality of innocence in different ways."

Max protested, "Esha, you've lived through my life, so you obviously know some pretty ... mean things that I've done to people."

Esha responded, "Innocence isn't just about doing mean things or not; it's about awareness or the lack of it."

Everything became quiet again as everyone seemed to become lost in thought, then suddenly, Victoria looked at Max suspiciously. "Max, that one time when I was sitting on the dorm steps and wouldn't let you by, you were the one that caused that paint to fall on me, weren't you."

The suddenness of the question startled Max as she responded regretfully, "Um ... yeah, sorry about that; I guess I could have found another way in, but it was just ... there."

For a moment, Victoria glared at her, then her face warped into amusement as she responded, "Good for you; I totally deserved. ... God, it freaks me out thinking how different I was just a month ago."

Max was relieved as she became curious. "Was there a specific moment that changed you or was it more of a gradual thing?"

"Some of it was gradual after Nathan died and Jefferson was hauled away. Nathan's funeral had an impact, but the biggest one was Kate's funeral; I wasn't the same person after I saw her lying in that coffin like that ... without life. It's like, for the first time, a mirror was in front of me, and I didn't like what I saw. ... When I heard about Rachel's funeral, part of me wanted to go, but I couldn't bring myself to do it again; I knew it wasn't going to be an open casket, but I still couldn't face any more death.

"I felt like I was losing my mind; as I said, I didn't know who I was anymore ... but then I ran into you and Esha, and I suddenly saw something in myself that I liked. And the more I was with you, the more I felt it. If it wasn't for you and Esha, something tells me I wouldn't have ended up in a good place." Everyone smiled at her affectionately as Esha reached out and held her hand.

After they practiced meditation and Esha drilled Max in the new technique to deal with her sensual energy, they sat back in the booth as Rachel looked curious. "Esha, can we hear some more stories about your gurus? In particular, I'd love to know about the guru you mentioned that could change a person's mind; sounds like some Jedi shit."

Esha smiled with amusement. "That particular guru, who I called Swami Aadi, could also see people's thoughts and feelings. In fact, that was the reason he was in a cave deep within the Himalayan mountains, that is, to escape other people's feelings and thoughts so he could master his own.

"His story began in a slum, a story too common in India, and when he was old enough, he quickly delved into a life of thievery and swindling. When his power began manifesting, he immediately used it to deceive and manipulate people for profit, but it soon became too much to bear. Not able to tell his own feelings and thoughts from others, he left the city and moved to a small town, but even that became too much, so he went into the mountains and found peace in a cave.

"Eventually, when he began losing his mind to his own thoughts and feelings, he ran into my guru, Swami Rama, who happened to be wandering the mountainsides deeper than usual at the time. Swami Rama taught him how to control his thoughts, and in return, Swami Aadi helped him deal with his own hidden thoughts and feeling that he kept deep within himself.

"My guru had much difficulty dealing with the death of his daughter, which, as you know, drove him into the mountains; with his permission, Swami Aadi helped mold his thoughts into the wise and enlightened man I knew. Part of himself still longs to see her again, but he learned to manage and control it, thanks to Swami Aadi.

"I learned from him the subtle yet effective art of changing people's minds. Although I never mastered it at his level, I was still able to use it in simple ways, like when I helped Chloe get over her tobacco and marijuana addiction and when I helped Rachel curb her karmic desires with Max's help."

"Did he help you?"

"At the time, I wasn't comfortable with a man being in my head. Perhaps it was for the best, though; if he had healed the wounds from my experience of being raped, I may never have met the two of you or helped Chloe. A scar like that can be both a burden and a guiding stone, in a way."

Everyone remained interested. "What about the one that could see the future?"

"Yes, he was one of the most entertaining of them. After spending awhile with a woman who could sleep with a book underneath her pillow and wake the next day with the knowledge it contained, she abruptly sent me on my way to a nearby town. When I got there, I sat down and ate at a restaurant, and a skinny white-bearded man wearing nothing but a loincloth was sitting across from me and eating. When I finished eating, he didn't even look at me when he said, 'We should get going; it's a far walk to my abode.' At first, I thought he was a rambling lunatic, but then he told me who he was and how he knew Swami Rama. On our way there, he tried to explain how he could see me before I came, but most of it sounded purely nonsensical, which he seemed to realize with amusement.

"Before I met him, I never really knew what it was like to truly laugh. He would catch you off guard with the most bizarre and odd-sounding statements, and whenever you tried to do or say something, he reacted to it before you did or said it, sometimes before it even occurred to you to say or do it. Oftentimes, it got so bad that it gave him a headache; this was when he usually suggested we meditate. At first, I thought my guru sent me to him to learn about his abilities like the others, but after quickly learning this was impossible, it was obvious that he sent me to learn how to laugh and have a sense of humor about things."

By mid-afternoon, Chloe was tired of driving, so they decided to stop in San Francisco for the day and stay at a nice hotel. After checking in, Rachel was eager to go out and wander around for the first time without a disguise, so they did and ended up eating at a restaurant overlooking the bay. After an uneventful evening of walking and chatting, they went back to the hotel, took showers, and went to sleep.