The Magicians' Realm Chapter 120: Bad Shots, a yu-gi-oh fanfic

Chapter 120, everybody! Good news, got my big computer working again—turns out it was from a Windows update. Thanks, Microsoft. *sarcasm test complete*

This'll probably be the last update for a while as I get the next section unsnarled—a lot of what was originally written at this point is getting scrapped and either rewritten or compacted, but the end result should be a bit brisker and hopefully I get this done before this fic's ten-year anniversary *sob*

In other news, Hephaestus and Vulcan are Confused™ and Yami went and brought the thunder. Also Skulduggery is…honestly acting as he would in his canon the man could be absolutely terrifying under the right circumstances (or rather, the wrong ones). Also I don't know if his assessment on kids is honestly the correct one but considering adults generally have more experience….

Angiembabe, thanks for the review! Yes he did! D: And…yes that gets confirmed this chapter. :D

References:

Original characters, + setting © Kineil D. Wicks (myself, not the girl in the story)

So for the record, the first barricades that Hephaestus and Vulcan ran into were enough for concern—enough so that they took the long way around despite the rain, cursing and questioning just what was going on around here—

Those questions deepened when they finally reached Skellington Manor and saw the trashed cars and the Bentley parked on the steps, although those took a backseat to the chaos everywhere.

Trashed door, G-Men everywhere—both of them dove for the trunk when they realized there'd be lead flying and they needed protection—

Although the bigger question of the massive dragon coiling in and out of the clouds and hollering invectives before firing off torrents of lightning probably took the cake.

"Wow," Hephaestus noised. "Yami's really been working on that."

"Yeah get down," Vulcan ordered, pushing his head down right before a bullet went through it.

"OI!" Hephaestus barked. "Why are those losers shooting at us?"

"I don't know, but I say we fix that," Vulcan said, snatching a shotgun out of the trunk and leaning around the car.

What followed was a gunfight in which everyone but Yami brought a gun—or maybe it was a dragonfight and Yami was the only one who brought the dragon. The point of the matter was, after the first five minutes of electricity flying everywhere most of the goons with guns decided that the big coiling dragon was probably the bigger threat—which was when Skulduggery blew out of the house and broadsided them.

"Oi!" Hephaestus barked, running up the stairs. "What's going on!? We're gone for like five minutes!"

"Have you seen Administrator Carter?" Skulduggery asked.

"No, which I was considering a perk, honestly—"

"IN!" Vulcan yelled, tackling them back inside as the outside exploded with lightning, the dragon hitting the ground and leaping around the house in great arcs of electricity, frying whatever poor saps were left, collapsing as it arced back on several trying to escape—

Magic parting just in time for Yami to sock the last one hard in the face.

"Wow," Hephaestus said. "Don't think I've ever seen you punch anybody before."

"Yeah—ow," Yami muttered, sucking on his knuckles as he staggered up the steps. "You lied to me when you said that'd be satisfying."

"Well it is for me usually. What happened? We were gone for five minutes—were we even gone that long?" he asked Vulcan.

"Maybe ten," Vulcan said—glanced when Skulduggery went back in and followed.

"My house," Yami moaned.

"So what? You snap your fingers and it's fixed," Hephaestus pointed out.

"It's the principle of it," Yami said, waving a hand and fixing the front door behind him. "Are the girls okay?"

"'Are the girls okay?' Will someone PLEASE explain to me what's going on!"

"Administrator Carter was here, he took the others to the woods," Skulduggery said, indicating Kineil sitting on the dining room table with a shotgun lying across her lap. "As for why these men were here to begin with…our new friends here would like to explain."

"Apparently Max knocked these two out," Kineil said as they crossed the living room to see two G-Men trussed up in what had been the drapes. "Which, for the record, is entertaining to picture."

"Max?" Hepaestus repeated. "Our Max? I mean much as I'd rather not claim ownership but—"

"Focus, please," Vulcan said.

"Right, sorry."

Skulduggery stood next to Kineil and leaned back against the table, considering the two trussed-up G-Men in front of him. "So," he announced. "Here lies two Commoner agents of the Civil Branch, come uninvited into a Magician's house, and not just any Magician's, but the Head Mage's. I assume you have a warrant."

"We're not talking," one said. "You're just going to have to shoot us."

"You misunderstand. We're Magicians. Kineil."

Hephaestus had to look away from Kineil, seeing as how her eyes were burning enough that it made glancing at her painful. The two guys on the floor, meantime, didn't realize this issue, were squirming and writhing in moments before one finally barked out "I give I give! The Administrators contacted us a few days ago," he wheezed. "One saw Grand Agent Montgau personally. Next thing we know we're down here working on a list that's got to be at least fifty people long."

"When you say working on, how do you mean?"

"Arresting? Had to deputize a bunch of locals because of how many people are on the list."

"And do you have this hypothetical list?"

Vulcan fished in the guy's shirt when he muttered front pocket, pulled out a roll that nearly touched the floor when he unrolled it.

"Holy crow," Vulcan said when he started reading. "We're all on here—look, Heph, you and I are near the top of the list!"

"There's a bunch of other names I recognize too," Hephaestus said, scanning through it. "What, did they decide to get Yami's social book and just hit everybody?"

"Okay but arresting," Kineil said. "That doesn't exactly involve shooting."

"You wanna talk about that shotgun you got?"

"You wanna talk to the business end? They shot first!"

"We were told to expect resistance with deadly intent," the other guy said.

"Why?"

That one word made all of them jump, look at Yami—couldn't help the little shudder at him right now. He didn't necessarily look different, was looking at the guys with some inscrutable expression, but he was putting off the same vibes as a bomb about to go off—impending danger and destruction.

"Why are you arresting everyone I know?" Yami demanded, tone still even but with an undercurrent of fury. "Why did you come to my house and start shooting at people." Hesitation on the men's part—"I expect an answer."

"I-I don't know," the one guy said. "I don't, okay? Grand Agent Montgau got all—I don't know, all screwy once that guy left—we didn't even get a briefing on the train ride down, just a list!"

"And you didn't once think to question any of this?" Skulduggery asked.

"You didn't think we tried?" the other guy demanded. "There were these Magician kooks riding with us—weirdos like you. Anybody that asked got turned into something unnatural and thrown off the train."

Skulduggery looked at Yami. "I don't like this. Coupled with everything else…this is a coup," he said, jaw tightening. "This is a coup with the intent to be rid of you and everyone associated with you—I just can't figure out why."

"Whatever they were doing with those—those folders," Yami spat, pacing away, anger literally simmering off him now—wow, Hephaestus didn't think he had ever seen Yami this mad before. Come to think of it, he didn't think he had ever seen Yami mad. "They're getting rid of Magicians—anyone who opposes them, honestly—but why would they even do this?"

"There's no point in trying to figure out a madman's reasoning," Skulduggery said. "But I think it's about time we do as Administrator Carter advised and go back and make sure those problems are dead and buried. Miss Wicks, you know where the others went, take the boys and get them somewhere safe until we come get you. As for you two—"

Whatever fate was going to befall the agents was cut off by the phone ringing. Everyone exchanged glances—

Yami got to the phone first. "Teana?"

Hephaestus really didn't like how Yami paled right then, like someone had sucked all the blood out of him. Nor did he like the way he hung up the phone.

"What?" he demanded, unnerved by the way Yami just—stared at the phone. "What? Who was that?"

"Administrator Serpine," Yami said dully, causing Skulduggery to start. "He said—he said they've got Teana. And Idgy, and Jack." Looked up at them, at the stock-still detective. "He said Max…that Administrator Carter brought them right—that he was in on it."

Dead silence as the full weight of what was going on started to sink in—running smack into a firefight and then everything after, nothing had had a chance to settle in Hephaestus's mind, but this—

"No," Kineil said. "No there's no way Max was in on it—he was right here, he would have kicked up more of a fuss at me not gone oh well and—"

Some weird shivery feeling went through the air, making their ears pop.

"What was that?" Hephaestus asked.

"Someone sealed the house," Yami said. "Maybe the whole property."

"Fine," Vulcan said, ratcheting the shotgun. "I can work with that."

"You do as Detective Pleasant says—I'm putting a stop to this, right now."

"Do you even know where they've got the girls?" Hephaestus asked.

"I intend to find out," Yami said, storming out.

"Oi—OI we need a plan!" Hephaestus turned to the others, feeling lost—

Skulduggery turned to the two agents and shot them both.

"HEY!" Vulcan barked. "What was—we could have traded them why did you shoot them!?"

"They were resisting arrest," Skulduggery said flatly, before marching out of the house as well.

"Resisted—get back here," Vulcan stormed, running after him—Hephaestus and Kineil exchanged glances before running after them as well. "You just shot two guys in our house you can't just run off half-cocked like Yami we need a plan!"

"I have a plan," Skulduggery said, getting into a car that had survived the altercation and turning the engine over. "I'm killing them all and rescuing my wife and child. And if anyone tries to stop me, I'm shooting them too." Backed the car out of the gate. "By the way, that extends to you as well."

"They're expecting that, you idiot!" Vulcan hollered after him, running down the steps and to the road as a drizzle made itself known again. "You're driving right into a trap get back here!"

Gone.

"What—" Hephaestus looked at Kineil. "What even happened here? Everything was fine this morning!"

Kineil didn't answer—she was clutching the shotgun and looking like she was having to work hard to compose herself.

"Days like today don't come with warning labels," Vulcan groused, stalking back up the stairs. "Come on—there's got to be a plan, something we can do—take the tunnels to the Revue and—"

They both started at the sound of a door being opened behind them—

Were running for the car when they realized that there were more G-Men coming from the tunnels.

No time then—just one objective now, and that was getting out of dodge.

*/*\*

Yami left Mitzi watching the kids, currently pinned under a sleeping spell to at least give everyone time to simmer down. That it would also potentially reduce complications from a magic infusion was just a bonus, but he didn't need the look she gave him as he left to check on the others.

There was no choice, he told himself. There's medical precedence. If I hadn't done it, those kids would be dead in the next day. I had to do it, there's no point in feeling guilty about it.

Granted, this didn't change the fact that he did feel at least a little guilty about it, but he could debate about basically knocking children out and force-feeding them when they weren't in immediate danger of death. Speaking of.

"I don't suppose your mood has improved, has it?" he asked Kineil, currently sitting at a packed work bench and looking like she was still steaming.

"My mood has not," she said, fortunately glaring at nothing. "But at least I'm trending towards productive now."

"Yeah what happened she's being scary and it's making it difficult to ask her for help," Hephaestus said. "By the way, wrench, preferably not to the face."

"There was a minor disagreement earlier between some of the kids and Dr. Heller," Yami said, watching Kineil carefully.

"Yeah speaking of I am done babysitting," Kineil spat. "You can get someone else to deal with them, I'm done, I'm going back to my stance of never having children. Ever."

"Ah," Hephaestus started.

"You shut up."

"Well the good news is, we've pushed pause on that particular situation for right now," Yami said. "Said kids are taking an extended rest, and should they wake up they're currently locked away in their rooms where they can't misbehave for the foreseeable future."

"At least until they starve to death and are permanently our problem."

"Well the good news is, I solved that problem too."

That got Kineil and Hephaestus looking sharply at him. "You do what?"

Yami got ready to answer, was interrupted by Skulduggery coming over. "What's this I hear about you assigning Kineil babysitting duty?" he demanded. "You know she's terrible at it."

"Okay, you're right, but at the same time hey," Kineil said.

"Also Bakura of all people did you forget you have a person with experience right here."

"You were busy helping Jake with those runes," Yami pointed out.

"And now I'm not," he said. "Which means I'm now officially free."

"Are you done-done, or did Jake threaten to steal your head over the skeleton puns?" Vulcan asked, lowering himself down. "Also, is Kineil still mad I want to know so I can stay up there."

"Truly good puns are never appreciated in their time," Skulduggery sighed. "But we're done-done. I told you all when we started that I only had a limited knowledge of runes even with knowing China—all I can really tell you is that these won't cause us to explode messily when activated."

"I mean, that's better than what we had," Hephaestus said.

"Still the problem of getting smeared across multiple dimensions," Vulcan said.

"Yeah that sucks."

"It does. And I'm still open for babysitting duty," Skulduggery said, looking at Yami. "Dare I ask what trouble they got up to whilst evading you so-called responsible adults?"

Ouch. "I might have finally run out of patience and knocked them out with a sleeping spell," Yami said. And then yelped when a wrench connected with his head.

"And you couldn't have done this from the beginning why?" Kineil demanded.

"It would have been a bit simpler," Skulduggery agreed. "Granted it wouldn't have stopped the main issue completely, but it would have at least slowed it down."

"So that issue is solved too, actually," Yami said.

"You finally convinced them to eat something?"

"And this is the part where you start getting mad at me."

He really, really wished one of them would start showing emotion soon—yes he could get that Skulduggery having a skull face meant that his expressions were limited, but no one reacting was starting to make his spine crawl and he'd really like for someone to do something soon. The silence that followed didn't help either.

"Seriously?" Vulcan asked finally.

"I'm open to hearing what else I could have done," Yami said testily.

"You explain the situation, maybe?"

"They were obviously aware of what would happen—"

"Never assume that children know what's best for them," Skulduggery interrupted. "Their worldview is limited and any worst-case scenarios they think of gets blown out of proportion. They barely think of death until they have to and it's beyond their ken to think of a fate worse than that. You should have sat them down and explained it instead of just letting it fester."

"How was I supposed to know that?"

"It's called common sense—forget it, where are they?"

"Back in the town hall, in their rooms, they'll probably be asleep for another hour—where are you going?" he asked as Skulduggery stalked off.

"To the town hall," he responded. "Because apparently I'm the only one around here who has any experience with parenthood."

"Well I won't deny that," Yami muttered, looking back at the rest of them. "You think I should have done something differently?"

"Knock them out sooner?" Vulcan asked.

"Listen, I'm not feeling really charitable towards these kids, so I don't rightly care," Kineil said. "So someone better give me some good news."

"Well if this box Skulduggery delivered is any indication," Hephaestus said, flipping it open. "Ah."

Ah was a good way of describing the heavily-carved handle and lever that Skulduggery had the foresight to wrap up in a handkerchief before boxing it up and bringing it over.

"If you fake tripping as you take that over, I'm ripping your spine out and beating you with it," Kineil told Hephaestus as he gingerly picked it up.

"Well you're no fun," Hephaestus muttered, heading over to the control booth. "Fine then, dampen my glee."

"You know I'd help her, right?" Vulcan asked, finally touching down.

"Yeah yeah, whatever," Hephaestus said, slotting the lever into place. "Okay, so good news: after much blood, sweat and tears—"

"Ah," Vulcan started.

"It's a metaphor, Vul."

"Good news implies there's bad news," Kineil pointed out.

"Yeah well, good news is the tower's done. Thanks for ruining the moment, Vul."

"No problem," Vulcan said, giving him a thumbs up as they went back over to the table.

"The only problem is, at this point we need something already in the alternate dimension to hook onto and guide the tower to it," Hephaestus said, poring over the blueprints. "Otherwise we're just sort of…shredding the space-time continuum to bits, and that kind of…you know, sucks. For everybody."

"That seems like a fair enough assessment," Kineil said, flicking a lugnut across the table.

"Fortunately, we have an accidental means of achieving this," Yami assured them. "Remember when I said I was a foot short?"

"And we're all in agreement," she said drily, watching him as he lifted a leg—

And waved his hand clean through his foot, evaporating it.

She, Vulcan and Hephaestus weren't capable of much else except staring at him blankly, trying to process this. "Oh…kay," Hephaestus said finally.

"During my little scuffle with the kids, they managed to steal both my feet away from me," Yami explained. "I got one back, but I'm a little worried the other was just chunked away in the woods. The good news is, that means we can use myself to get us back home."

Hephaestus nodded slowly, turning this over. "Yeah…yeah that would actually work! I mean there's no chance of it killing you, since you're already dead—"

"That's the spirit," Yami said, summoning back the shadowy version of a foot he had been using before digging through his clothes and into his chest.

"You know," Kineil said conversationally when he pulled out a hunk of magic. "All these years, I've come to the conclusion that Magicians are responsible for all the dust."

"It does seem to be the case," Yami observed, evaluating the cloud of magic he had before tipping it into the receptacle. Hephaestus worked some of the levers and dials….

The tower rumbled to life, gears grinding, parts moving, hooking into the fabric of space and time—

And then the doorway suddenly flashed to life, revealing a bright arch flickering with light. Yami was grinning as he took it in.

"Get the kids," he ordered.