Chapter 14
Harry's Eventful Eleventh Birthday
The next day
Wednesday, July 31, 1991; morning
Harry's eleventh birthday
Also, the day Quirrellmort attempts to break into Vault 713 at Gringotts
At Potter Manor
Paulina woke up to discover John sitting up in bed, his thighs covered with a conjured lap desk. With paper and a ballpoint pen, John was writing a letter to Director Ragnok at Gringotts. (John was writing the letter with no-magic paper and pen, as a proof that the letter was authentic.) John finished his letter, then showed the letter to Paulina.
She smiled at him. "You're so brave and clever." She kissed him. "And proactive." She kissed him again.
John banished the lap desk and pen, then called for house-elf Glaze. John told her, "Go to Gringotts, to Director Ragnok's office. If he's not there, put this letter on his desk. If he's there in the office, hand him the letter and wait for a reply."
Pop. Glaze was gone.
After breakfast, in Diagon Alley
There were many differences between how young Harry visited Diagon Alley today, and how John (older Harry) had visited Diagon Alley seven years ago.
The last time, eleven-year-old Harry had been brought to Diagon Alley by Hagrid; this time Harry was brought to his older self and his older self's wife, who already were in Diagon Alley.
Last time, Harry and Hagrid had reached Charing Cross Road by nonmagical means, then had entered the Leaky Cauldron. Seven years later, John (older Harry) still remembered how panicked and frightened he had felt when the people in the Leaky had swarmed him. Hagrid had led Harry out the back of the Leaky and through a magical archway—and voilà, Diagon Alley.
This time, John and Paulina apparated from Potter Manor directly to Diagon Alley and, once there, called for Greyclay. John and Paulina ordered Greyclay to elf-pop young Harry in Potter Manor to where the newlyweds were standing in Diagon Alley.
John and Paulina brought young Harry to Diagon Alley this way, in order to save young Harry from being swarmed in the Leaky Cauldron. But also the newlyweds did this so Harry (and John) would not be forced by circumstances to shake the hand of Quirinus Quirrell too soon.
Anyway, once the three Potters were in Diagon Alley, they walked away from Apparation Zone Two, to begin their shopping. Their clothing was noteworthy.
John was wearing what would be considered "wizard casual" by the cut of his clothing. But the fabric of his robes was blue denim—the most noticeable nonmagical-world fabric. On the left breast of John's robes was the Potter crest in white, with a dashed-line white circle surrounding the crest—meaning, the person wearing these robes was the Potter Regent.
Paulina, at first glance, was wearing casual witch robes—those robes had blue-denim shoulder-covers, and Paulina's hair was wrapped in a white-yarn hairnet. But Paulina's robes were made from bleached-white denim, which was a fabric that wizard-raised magicals never wore, not even casually. Scandalously, the hem of her robes did not modestly reach the toes of her shoes; but rather, her robes were hemmed four inches higher. Normally, onlookers could not get more than glimpses of a witch's shoes, but this morning it was clear to all onlookers that Paulina was wearing three-inch-heel white-denim-and-cork wedgies.
Most scandalous of all, Paulina's robes were not tubular between bust and hips; instead, her robes curved inward between bust and hips. The robes were shaped this way both to draw attention to Paulina's small, firm waist, and to highlight her magnificent, memorable, mammarial manifestations.
Paulina's casual robes looked like, in terms of their cut and fit, a cross between regular witch-casual robes and an evening gown.
On the left breast of Paulina's robes was the Potter crest in white, with a dashed-line yellow circle surrounding the crest. This design told any onlooker that Paulina was the spouse of the Potter Regent.
Witches in third year or older looked at Paulina Potter walking through Diagon Alley, and they fiercely wanted to have her shape. Wizards in third year or older looked at Paulina Potter and they fiercely wanted—something they would never get.
Harry was wearing boy-size casual wizard robes. The robes were commonplace in design, except that they had alternating vertical strips of blue denim and bleached-white denim. On the left breast of Harry's robes was no family crest at all. On Harry's head was a boy-size pointy wizard's hat; it was surely coincidence that the brim was shoved down low enough that Harry's forehead was covered up.
Harry wore no glasses now—nor had he worn glasses since the day after the horcrux had been removed from his scar.
Any onlookers who eyed the three denim-clad magicals would take them to be a young couple and their Hogwarts-firstie son. Which meant that the boy could not be Harry Potter, because everyone knew he had no living parents. Besides, everyone knew that Harry Potter wore black eyeglasses with round frames.
The walk to Ollivanders was peaceful. A few people recognized John and Paulina from their Daily Prophet photographs, and figured out that the boy with them had to be Harry Potter, but this happened only twice.
What happened to young Harry in Ollivanders this time was almost the same as what had happened to John (older Harry) seven years ago. Garrick Ollivander still acted creepy this time, then young Harry had to try twenty-three zillion wrong wands before the "right" wand chose him.
For the second time, the wand that chose Harry was holly wood with a phoenix-feather core, eleven inches long. Afterward, Ollivander went into his creepy Oi, your wand is the brother of the wand that Voldemort owned speech. John refrained from rolling his eyes; meanwhile, Harry's eyes were wide—from surprise, from fear, or from both, who could guess?
But this visit to Ollivanders Wand Shop differed from last time in two ways. Last time, nobody mentioned wand holsters; this time, John bought wand holsters for Harry and for Hermione. The other thing that was different about this trip to Ollivanders was that seven years ago, Ollivanders was the sixth shop in Diagon Alley that Harry went to, after Eeylops Owl Emporium; this time, Ollivanders was Harry's first stop, even before Gringotts.
Once the Potters left Ollivanders, Harry told John and Paulina that he felt like a "real wizard" now, because now he was carrying a wand.
As the Potters were climbing the steps of Gringotts, Paulina warned Harry that "things are about to go crazy inside Gringotts."
Harry pointed to a WANTED poster on the outside of the white bank, which informed everyone that Albus Dumbledore had stolen G428,175 from "Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived."
As Harry pointed to the poster, he remarked, "Hopefully Dumbledore will get arrested, with lots of flashing lights and noise."
Two goblins, each wearing armor and with an axe-scabbard strapped to his back, opened the outer doors for the three Potters. Harry said, "Thank you, gentlemen."
The Potters walked up to, but not through, the second set of doors. John and Paulina paused to let Harry read the Enter, stranger, but take heed poem.
With the poem read, the three Potters walked into the Gringotts lobby.
As soon as the Potters did so, a strange thrum-thrum-thrum-thrum sound came from the lobby's ceiling.
John looked up. Just below the ceiling was a small purple ball, about the size of a marble. The purple ball grew downward, becoming a six-foot-long vertical purple tube, which went from the ceiling down to a few feet above the stone floor. The purple tube widened, both left and right and forward and backward, to become a purple man-shape. The man-shape changed colors to almost-normal human colors—
—and in front of the Potters, other Gringotts customers, unarmed goblin tellers, and armed goblin guards, Albus Dumbledore dropped to the floor of the Gringotts lobby.
Albus Dumbledore was afloat in Courtroom Ten—unable to speak, unable to move—when the two Judges' voices spoke in unison to Albus—
"Albus Percival Dumbledore, you would take Harry Potter away from family who would care for him, solely so you can resume stealing from his vaults, and so you can work to cause his death to further your glory. We are sorely wroth with you.
"Albus Percival Dumbledore, you shall be put into a between-dimensional space in which no time passes, until John Potter and Paulina Potter enter the lobby of Gringotts London. Then you shall emerge from the between-dimensional space into the lobby of Gringotts London. After this, you will be at the mercy of the goblins and their laws."
Even as Albus was trying to figure out how to cast a room-wide Obliviate without the Elder Wand—he could not have everyone in the courtroom remembering what they just had heard—Albus felt a moment of extreme cold, as though he had rolled naked in a snowbank.
Then Albus fell—but now he was not in Courtroom Ten, he was in the Gringotts lobby.
Before Albus could figure out what was going on, a goblin guard, with a gripped axe and an angry face, suddenly was running towards Albus and shouting, "Akog Dumbledore Albus! Megkrob pu!"
Four goblin guards, using axes and spears, herded Albus out of the Gringotts lobby, fast enough that he did not have time to read all the text to those insulting "WANTED: Albus P Dumbledore" posters on the walls.
The one time that Albus was able to look over his shoulder without being poked with a spearpoint, Albus saw John Potter, his wife, and Harry Potter walking behind the goblins and Albus. Poor Harry, Albus noticed, was missing his glasses.
Albus had only barely enough time to see that John Potter was smiling at Albus. The smile was vampiric.
Albus desperately wanted to speak with Harry Potter; the boy needed to be moulded into following his destiny. But neither the goblins nor John Potter would allow this right now. Albus was frustrated.
Albus was not at all worried about his upcoming goblin trial. Whatever problem the goblins had with Albus, he was sure he could smooth-talk his way out of trouble.
A half-hour later
Albus was worried about the verdict of his goblin-court trial, which still had not been announced.
The first sign that Albus was in trouble had been right after his arrest. He had been herded at spearpoint into a room. He then had been strip-searched by three goblin warriors, and his two wands and three Portkeys had been taken. He had been given to wear at his goblin trial, old and threadbare grey robes, and worn-out shoes that stank.
As soon as Albus had been dressed, he had been herded at spearpoint into the goblin courtroom.
What Albus had noticed immediately, upon being forced into the goblin courtroom, was that the courtroom had a spectator section; and in the left-rear corner of that spectator section had sat Harry. An armoured and spear-carrying goblin had stood in front of Harry but slightly to the side; the boy could see Albus's trial, but no way could Albus walk over to the boy without being poked by sharp steel.
Albus had demanded that he be handed over to the Ministry for trial. Director Ragnok (who for some reason had been sitting with John Potter and his blond wife) had laughed scornfully. "No, Wizard Dumbledore. You committed your crimes in Gringotts, so you shall be tried in Gringotts. The good news is, we shall not dose you with Veritaserum."
Albus had felt relief—but that feeling had disappeared once the trial had started.
It turned out that what Director Ragnok had meant was that the goblins had their own version of a truth potion, and Albus had been forced to drink it. Albus also had been forced to sit in something called the Truth Chair.
Between the potion and the chair, Albus had been completely unable to finesse the truth. Now the goblins knew about fourteen vaults that Albus had keys for, that had belonged to now-dead Muggle-born Hogwarts orphaned students. Now the goblins knew what Albus and now-dead Bronzedagger had done to Harry Potter's vault. Now the goblins knew about the G107 000 that Albus and Bronzedagger had stolen from Vault 14 (the Potter coinage vault) and had put in Muggle bank accounts (after Bronzedagger had diverted 10 percent).
Truth-compelled Albus had been his own most damaging witness.
After all the testimony ended, the assessment against Albus was that he must pay G588 693 to the Potter vaults. Paying this much money hurt—but luckily for Albus, the fourteen orphan vaults had enough coinage in them that not only could Albus pay the full assessment (and thus avoid being beheaded), but Albus had about half a million galleons left over.
This was the good news.
The bad news was that the goblin judge sentenced Albus to eighty years in Gringotts London's gold mine.
Albus thought, I won't live eighty years working in a goblin mine. This is a sooner-or-later death sentence.
Meanwhile, Director Ragnok and John Potter both were looking at Albus, and both were grinning evilly.
"Albus my friend," said John Potter, "Director Ragnok and I have an offer for you."
Ragnok said to Albus, "The offer that Wizard John Potter and I are making to you is that Gringotts will postpone the start of your forced-labor sentence in the mines—in certain conditions."
Albus asked cautiously, "What are the conditions?"
Ragnok replied, "Currently the value of the coinage vaults that you control, not counting vaults you control as headmaster of Hogwarts or as Head of House Dumbledore, is G461 946. The main part of our offer is that if Gringotts removes fifty-five hundred galleons from one of your personal vaults on the last day of the month, starting today, we'll delay the start of your forced-labour sentence until one month later. This offer is made for a maximum of eighty-three months. Until we call you in, you remain the headmaster of Hogwarts."
John Potter's blond wife said, "Eighty-three months from now is the last day of June, 1998. G5 500 times eighty-three is G456 500—in theory, this leaves you with G5 446."
John Potter said, "Why that date, June of 1998? By a remarkable coincidence, an eleven-year-old who would start their Hogwarts education next month would take their NEWTs in June, 1998."
John Potter looked meaningfully at Harry Potter, then turned back to look at Albus with a raised eyebrow.
Albus said, "Fifty-five hundred galleons per month is extortionate! I—"
John Potter said, "So you're asking the goblins to put you to work today? I hope, for your sake, you can do wandless healing to fix the calluses you'll have on your hands tonight."
Ragnok said, "Before we even try to take fifty-five hundred galleons from your vault the first time, you must swear an oath on your life that when you receive the message from us, 'Report to Gringotts to begin your sentence,' you'll do so within ten minutes, zero seconds, of receiving the message. Otherwise..."
Potter's blond wife said, "Otherwise, sugar, it's 'the next great adventure' for you."
"Ten minutes?" Albus sputtered. "I need more time than that to get my affairs in order."
"Ten minutes, Thief Dumbledore," said Ragnok. "Not one second more. Accept this, or tell us you're refusing the offer."
John Potter said to Ragnok, "Right now, I bet Dumbles is thinking up ways to block that Gringotts 'You are summoned' message from getting to him. After all, for ten years, Dumbles blocked Gringotts from delivering account statements to Harry."
Ragnok said, "This is true. But before now, Gringotts did not factor-in how dishonourable Albus Dumbledore is. Now, we've changed our planning to take Thief Dumbledore's dishonourable scheming into account."
Ragnok looked into Albus's eyes, "When Gringotts sends out its 'Come here' message, even if you're trying to hide in deepest, darkest Africa or in the Amazon rain forest, you shall get the message. I guarantee it. Make plans accordingly."
John Potter grinned at Albus. "But our offer has two nasties in it— two situations will make you lose your freedom early. The first is if Gringotts goes to take fifty-five hundred galleons from you on the last day of a month, and you don't have fifty-five hundred galleons to spare. The other situation is that when Paulina, Harry and I withdraw from Hogwarts, the day we leave the school forever is the day you go from headmaster to prisoner-miner."
The blonde woman added, "John and I intend for Harry to attend this joke of a school only during his first year. You could be swinging a pick as soon as eleven months from now."
John said, "Of course, we might fly to the Colonies even sooner, if you piss me off."
The blonde stated, "Harry will attend his first year at Hogwarts while taking a regular first-year's load of classes. But John and I will each be taking only one class: seventh-year Charms."
Albus said, "You also should take seventh-year Transfiguration, assuming you have the OWLs for it. Minerva McGonagall has a mastery in Transfiguration."
John Potter said, "This is true. But what also is true is that she's your most devoted minion."
Albus asked, "What determines when you Potters leave Hogwarts? John my boy, it was my understanding that you do not wish to spend even one day at Hogwarts, much less ten months. What changed your mind?"
John Potter replied, "We intend for Harry to attend Hogwarts for one year only, for reasons I won't tell you, unless you cause a crisis that forces us to flee this school earlier."
John's unspoken reasons? John was giving himself a year at Hogwarts in order to vanquish the Dark Lord.
The main reason the Potters would attend Hogwarts for one year was because young Hermione was locked into attending Hogwarts as a first-year, and Hermione needed a Protector; but John would not draw Dumbledore's attention to Hermione before the Sorting.
Now John continued, "If Harry truly wants to remain a student at Hogwarts after a year, I'll consider it. But that's only if this is what he truly wants. Not"—here John put on a robotic British accent—" 'I want to attend Hogwarts because it is the best magical school in the world, and because everything Headmaster Dumbledore does is for the Greater Good.' "
Albus said, "John my boy, I'm sure I can persuade Harry to remain at Hogwarts after first year."
"Can you? Are you sure? Because just as Director Ragnok will require you to give an oath on your life, I am requiring you to make an oath on your magic that you won't mind-whammy Harry or me—no Obliviate cast even once, no potion sneaked into a drink. No Confundo, no Compulsion, and no Imperius. No magical mind-push of any kind, even a little."
"John my boy, you will accuse me of using mind-magics on young Harry, when he asks to remain a student at the school where both his parents attended? It sounds to me like you already have made up your mind."
"Oh, you're referring to Hogwarts, the school that has a new DADA professor every year? And where a ghost teaches History of Magic? And where Severus Snape teaches Potions? Even in Massachusetts, we've heard of Professor Snape. So yes, if Harry asks to stay here in your crap school, I'll be checking him for mind-whammies."
"I have complete confidence in Professor Snape."
"If that's your attitude, I have complete confidence that one year from now, you'll be swinging a pick."
Dumbledore looked at John. "You said in the Prophet that neither you American Potters nor Harry would attend Hogwarts, but now you've committing to Harry attending here a year, with me as headmaster. You are giving me what I want, on a silver platter. Why? Ragnok wants this deal because the goblins can take fifty-five hundred galleons a month from me, but why do you want me to make this deal?"
John replied pompously, "Albus old chap, answering that question would only distress you, so for your own peace of mind, I will decline to answer."
Dumbledore asked the question again, three different ways, but John never gave him an answer. Dumbledore did not like being treated this way, judging by his frowns.
Dumbledore wanted to negotiate the deal that John and Ragnok were "offering" him, with terms less awful for himself. But both Ragnok and John refused to play this game. Take it or leave it was the attitude of John and of Ragnok.
Dumbledore wanted to place conditions on when and how John could withdraw Harry from Hogwarts. John refused to discuss the topic.
John said, "Listen up, thief. Your choices are to accept our deal with our terms as we stated them, or to start work in the gold mine today. Neither Director Ragnok nor I see 'the Defeater of Grindelwald' when we look at you; we see a lowlife who stole from orphans."
Frowning Dumbledore made the oath on his life to Director Ragnok. Then it was time for Dumbledore to make the oath on his magic to John Potter—
"I, Albus Percival Dumbledore, swear on my magic that John George Potter never shall detect me trying to perform any sort of mind-magic on him or on Harry James Potter, mind-magic that would be detected by an OPCC&I scan at Saint Mungo's, by Potter family magic, or by John Potter's personal magic. So mote it be." Light flashed.
John noticed that all the time that Dumbledore was speaking his oath to John, the thief headmaster was smirking.
John thought, Dumbledore thinks he knows a way to get around his oath not to be caught mind-whammying Harry or me.
Then John thought, Good. I want him to fall into my trap. Muggleness will teach Dumbledore humility.
After this, the three Potters met with Axefrenzy, the Potter account manager, in Axefrenzy's office. Dumbledore wanted to go with the Potters, to "advise" John and Harry. What happened instead was that goblin guards frog-marched Dumbledore out of Gringotts Bank and down the steps.
Presumably during his forced walk, Dumbledore got a good look at all the "WANTED: Albus P Dumbledore" posters.
Meanwhile in Axefrenzy's office, Harry was given the key to his trust vault; Axefrenzy told Harry not to loan the key out to anyone. Harry nodded.
Next, John, as the Potter Regent, removed the Potter Protection ring from Harry's hand; then Axefrenzy offered Harry the Potter Heir Primary ring. The Potter Heir Primary ring was ridiculously oversized. (Harry could have fit two fingers inside the ring, if he had wanted to.) As soon as Harry slipped the large ring on his finger, he froze, motionless and unbreathing, while bolts of white lightning came from the ring to run over every inch of Harry's body.
After about half a minute, the lightning stopped and the ring shrank to fit Harry's finger; Harry had been judged worthy to be the Potter Heir. Harry took a deep breath, then said, "Blimey, the ring is teaching me stuff!"
The Potter crest appeared in white on the left breast of Harry's casual robes. Because Harry was the Potter Heir Primary, the new Potter crest on his robes was surrounded by three thin white circles.
John thought about the events that he had just watched in Axefrenzy's office: Harry being given his trust-vault key and being given his Potter Heir ring. John thought, The last seven years of my life would have gone much better if someone had told me at age eleven to claim the vault-key and the magical ring to which I was entitled.
The three Potters made a quick cart-ride down to Vault 687. Seven years ago, John (older Harry) had taken money from the vault so he could buy school supplies; now the reason for young Harry to remove coins was a much more pleasant one—so he could have spending money!
Harry stared open-mouthed at the tall mounds of coins in Vault 687. John thought that seeing these mounds of coins still was impressive to him, seven years later.
A few minutes later, on the steps of Gringotts
As the three Potters were walking down the steps, John put his hand on Harry's shoulder and asked, "If a Hogwarts professor, or Mr. or Mrs. Granger, or another friend's parent ask you for the key to your trust vault, what should you do?"
Harry nervously replied, "Erm, give them the key, because they're an adult and they must have a good reason for asking?"
John said, "NO. Uncle Vernon did us wrong—he taught us to give an adult whatever he demands, whenever he demands it, without argument, even when he has no right to demand it of us. Neither Paulina nor I ever will demand your trust-vault key, and no other human adult has the right to demand you hand your key to them. No matter what his or her job title is, or what excuse someone gives for taking your key, don't give him or her the key. Not even Her Majesty the Queen may demand your trust-vault key."
Harry said, "So I should ignore it when Dumbledore says, 'Harry, give me that key.' "
John said, "That's right, ignore his demand. And if Dumbles tries it, he'll have me getting in his face."
Harry grinned. "Ooh, I want to see that."
As John grinned back, he thought, Sorry, Molly, this time you won't go on spending sprees that are paid for by Vault 687.
After the Potters' adventures at Gringotts, they did more shopping in Diagon Alley—at Flourish and Blotts, at the apothecary to buy Harry's potions kit, and at Eeylops Owl Emporium. At the third shop, it was love at first sight between Harry and a snowy white owl.
When the three Potters walked into Madam Malkin's, Draco Malfoy and his mother were walking out. Neither eleven-year-old boy spoke to the other, or showed curiosity about the other.
Meanwhile, in Gringotts Vault 713
Quirrellmort used the severed hand of a goblin Inferi to open the doors of the vault that contained Nicholas Flamel's Philosopher's Stone.
Quirrellmort found no red stone inside the vault. What Quirrellmort did find were six armed goblins, who were waiting for him.
Alas for the six goblins, from the day that Sybill Trelawney had spoken the Prophecy, Fate was protecting Tom Riddle from being killed by anyone except Harry Potter. In the magical battle between Quirrellmort and the six armed goblins, the six goblins were slaughtered.
Quirrellmort escaped before any (living) goblin at Gringotts got a good look at his current appearance.
But now Director Ragnok classified Voldemort as an enemy of Gringotts, though nobody knew what exactly this meant.
Later, back at Potter Manor
Harry said to John, "Can you please explain to me why you and the Head Goblin proved Dumbledore stole tonnes of money from my vault, then you set Dumbledore free?"
John sighed. "Dumbledore was the person who originally heard the Prophecy about you and Voldemort. So Dumbledore knows that only you can kill Voldemort—but the Prophecy doesn't say that you will kill Voldy. There's no guarantee. Understand me so far?"
Harry nodded.
"Dumbledore might or might not know right now that Voldemort already is at the school, pretending to be a professor in a purple turban named Quirinus Quirrell. But Dumbledore knows Voldemort will come. Dumbledore has told Hagrid, who is a loose-lipped man, and Snape, who is a Death Eater, that the Philosopher's Stone will be at Hogwarts this year. The Philosopher's Stone is a great prize because it can be used to make a potion that makes the drinker immortal. Dumbledore's plan is to lure Voldemort into coming to Hogwarts to try and steal the Philosopher's Stone, while tricking you into thinking that only you can 'save the Philosopher's Stone.' Still with me?"
Harry nodded again.
"What Dumbledore wants is for you to battle Voldemort till one of you dies. But Dumbledore has been rigging the game against you since before you were born, so that when you face Voldemort at Hogwarts in the prophesied battle, it will be you who dies. When Voldemort kills you, the Prophecy will be fulfilled. Then, so Dumbledore figures, someone other than you can kill Voldemort. Such as, hypothetically speaking, a bearded headmaster who already is the 'defeater' of the Dark Lord Grindelwald."
Harry stared in horror. "Dumbledore wants Voldemort to kill me."
John nodded. "But I know three things that Dumbledore doesn't know. He doesn't know that not only are you 'the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord,' but so am I. Dumbledore does not know that I know that Voldemort will be at the school this year. Finally, Dumbledore doesn't know that Voldemort will never be easier to destroy forever than he is this year. All of which means, I must be at Hogwarts this year—which means you must be at Hogwarts this year. I'm sorry."
Harry said, "I'm scared of what's coming."
John sighed. "You should be. With Dumbledore in charge, Hogwarts will be as dangerous for you as a pit of cobras. When I was at Hogwarts with no 'magical guardian' except Dumbledore himself, he kept me ignorant and weak while he controlled my movements, so that I was forced to battle Voldemort again and again, under conditions that almost ensured I'd die."
"This is awful. This is 'living with Aunt Marge' awful."
"And it's why ordinarily I'd never let you go near that school. But if you leave Hogwarts, or if you never come, Dumbledore will do everything in his power, both magically and politically, to drag you to Hogwarts. The laws will not matter to him, not a bit. Dumbledore will happily mind-whammy you or me to get what he wants."
Harry again stared at John in horror.
"So what happened today? I've all but dared Dumbledore to mind-whammy me, even though he'll lose his magic if I catch him at it. I'm taking a gamble here; what I'm doing is risky. But I think that if Dumbledore tries to mind-whammy you or me, that I can One, not be affected by the mind-magic because of how Eternity has changed my body; and Two, I can spot what he's doing. Then I can invoke Dumbledore's oath and strip him of his magic, and he no longer will be a threat to you."
Harry looked relieved.
Upon returning to Potter Manor
Young Harry began getting mail—serious mail. It was Harry's eleventh birthday, all of Wizarding Britain knew this fact, and the owl-mail redirect that Dumbledore had put on Harry had been vaporized—so today Harry was getting mail. Specifically, Harry was receiving birthday gifts by the tonne.
Most of the gifts were from serious-seeming adults who, along with their birthday gifts, wrote notes like "However you did it, thank you for saving us all from You Know Who."
Percy Weasley wrote a note like that. He also gave a gift: a copy of the Hogwarts Student Handbook, 1939 ed, along with sentence at the bottom of his note: "This, believe it or not, is the latest edition." The gift was certainly a surprise because, so far as had been publicly announced, Harry was beginning his magical schooling at Ilvermorny, not at Hogwarts. Conclusion: Percy was either clueless or a Seer.
Many gifts came from other magical children besides Percy Weasley. The notes these other children sent with their gifts were short, and said, "I'm starting/attending magical school too, at Hogwarts. Good luck at your American school. If you change your mind and go to Hogwarts, maybe we can be friends."
The gifts from the other magical children, and their givers—
• The book Introduction to Potions Ingredients and Preparations, gifted by Gemma Farley, who was a fifth-year Slytherin.
• A white quill and a bottle of ink, gifted by Cedric Diggory, who was a third-year Hufflepuff.
• A deck of Muggle playing cards that had been enchanted. If someone moved the four King-cards to lay flat and to touch each other, they broke into four-part male harmony, singing, "I'm He-ne-ry"—Henry—"the Eighth, I Am." The enchanted playing cards were gifted by Fred and George Weasley, who were Gryffindor third-years.
• A letter to Harry that wished him a happy birthday and good luck at his new school, and that thanked him for saving everyone from the Dark Lord Voldemort. The letter was written by Cho Chang, a second-year Ravenclaw. (For some reason, Cho Chang's letter smelled of perfume.)
• A handmade birthday card of construction paper and glitter, made jointly by Daphne Greengrass, Millicent Bulstrode, and Tracey Davis, who were unsorted first-years.
• A Muggle birthday card that showed a cartoon talking dog that was wearing a necktie. The card was given by Padma and Parvati Patil, who were unsorted first-years.
• A deck of Exploding Snap cards, which was gifted by Blaise Zabini, another unsorted first-year.
• Ten-year-old Luna Lovegood sent Harry a birthday card. Hers was typeset, saying "Happy birthday, Harry Potter!" in one-inch-tall red-and-yellow letters.
No Hogwarts professor sent Harry a gift.
That evening, at Potter Manor
John and Paulina threw a birthday party for Harry, with the Grangers as special guests.
It was Harry's first birthday party ever (that he could remember).
Harry got to eat cake and ice cream, without a fat cousin stealing the desserts off his plate. Harry thought this was brilliant.
Hermione gave Harry a firm Hermy-hug, a kiss on the cheek (as both children blushed), and a wrapped copy of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.