Finally it felt as though the wound in her side was beginning to improve. It no longer felt burning hot. It had ceased to strain painfully whenever she took anything other than the shallowest of breaths. Oksana wasn't feeling dizzy anymore. Still tired, yes, but not exhausted, sweaty and delirious with a clammy forehead and damp palms. She was remained confined to the hospital bay though. Still had a tube running into her vein and a concoction of pills to take twice daily. She would prefer to be back in her cell, but at least she was now able to get herself to the bathroom. That was definitely an improvement.
Oksana exhaled heavily, relishing in the lack of searing pain in her side, and turned her attention to the small table to the side of her curtained off space in the hospital bay. It housed a jug of water and a plastic cup, a clipboard with her medical notes scrawled on it, and a vase of daffodils. Garish. But lovely. Oksana's favourite flowers were white tulips, but she found herself suddenly able to appreciate these shining, yellow trumpets just as much.
And yet, Oksana felt conflicted. Her father had taught her to be suspicious of people who seek to buy her trust. Nothing in life is free. Everything has a cost. And nobody except family will care without expecting something in return. Sometimes even family weren't to be trusted. That was one of the few lessons Oksana learnt from her mother too. Not that it had been a lesson her mother sought to teach, more that her behaviour taught Oksana how even familial trust could be broken. But her father did no such thing. He cared infinitely. And he imparted his wisdom to his daughter. What would he think of Dr Polastri's flowers and gift? He would want to know why she had given them. What did she want? And that was the point that Oksana kept returning to. What didshe want? What could Oksana possibly give her?
Nothing. Oksana had nothing to offer. She had been stripped of all ability to reciprocate. If she were free it would be a different matter. If she were free she might buy Dr Polastri a perfume that she would adore. Outside these walls, and back home in St Petersburg, Oksana could offer Dr Polastri anything her heart desired. Or rather, she could offer that to anyone. Not Dr Polastri in particular, of course. Not in here though. In here she had very little autonomy.
Oksana had been puzzling over this conundrum since Dr Polastri had left three days earlier. Her eyes kept catching on the bright flowers, a beacon on the table, or a warning light perhaps. But what the danger was exactly, Oksana had been unable to decipher. And then there was the device, with the French lessons. When Dr Polastri had handed that over, Oksana felt a shift within herself. Something had bloomed inside her, or else materialised in her chest like a mushroom cloud. It was warm and it spread. She had found herself at a loss for words. The Dr had put thought into the buying of a gift for Oksana. She had considered what Oksana liked and what she might need, and she had brought her the perfect solution to both. Oksana was… touched. That is, until the suspicion crept in at the edges. The echoed reminder of her father's adage; nothing in life is free. Everything has a cost.
When Dr Polastri had first appeared by her bedside, Oksana had felt angry still. It was Dr Polastri's fault that she was stuck here in the first place. If she hadn't told Pargrave that Oksana needed to see a doctor, then Oksana would have carried on as normal and had her wound re-dressed as planned. And then Dr Polastri came in to see the invalid? What, to make her feel even more weak? To assert yet more dominance over Oksana? Oksana had planned to mess with her. To reel her in with her weakened infection-ridden state and then break her down like she had with the last psychologist. Make Dr Polastri feel as though she had the upper hand, and then crush her confidence like an empty can, void of purpose. There was an unfortunate truth at play now though, a troubling development. Oksana likedDr Polastri. She was sarcastic and clever, funny and able to match Oksana's verbal sparring blow for blow. Plus, it had been a long time since Oksana had been touched in such a caring manner without it being a prelude to hasty sex with a fellow inmate. Not that she would say no to that with Dr Polastri. With Dr Polastri, Oksana could almost imagine herself being willing to let the other woman return the favour, and that was something she never normally allowed.
With the inmates, Oksana used sex as a commodity. Every single one of those women now owed her something. They didn't know when she would call in a favour, and that made them wary, that gave her power, and power was important. Oksana didn't care about those women. But this amicable feeling towards the Dr… it was inconvenient and Oksana would have to find a way around it. There was nothing else to be done.
And yet, Dr Polastri had also unwittingly provided an interim solution for that conundrum too. Oksana needed something to occupy her time in the hospital bay and something to derail her thoughts. She was greatly enjoying her French lessons. The lessons themselves were basic, and far below her level of understanding of the language, but hearing it spoken aloud was highly beneficial for her accent. She was joyfully trying out her new verbal abilities on the nurses, throwing thoroughly filthy statements their way in a pinpoint precise accent and savouring their mostly bemused responses to the words they didn't understand. Bemused, all except the hot one.
Oksana had discovered to her delight that that particular nurse was rather enjoying the new game. Oksana began to notice the redness to the nurse's cheeks whenever Oksana slipped into the French tongue. The nurse's eyes flitted nervously to the gap in the curtain when she came to Oksana's bedside now. Her hand lingered when she passed Oksana her little cup of pills. She said goodbye when she finished her shift, and goodnight when she turned off the overhead light in the hospital bay. She had appeared by the bedside at one point simply to tell Oksana that she had posted the letter Oksana had asked her to. Oksana had very little recollection of the content of her response to Konstantin, having written it in a rather delirious state, but she could worry about that later. Instead, she simply thanked the nurse sincerely in French and watched her blush in response.
Oksana felt herself growing hungry for human contact now she was feeling more herself again. She would have to remember to thank Dr Polastri for the opportunity to gain such a reaction from the hot nurse.
It had been nearly an hour since Eve arrived at her office. That was somewhat of a record for her. Carolyn had looked almost alarmed when Eve made her way purposefully through reception earlier that morning, throwing a nod to Carolyn who was collecting her post from the main desk.
"You're here to drop off your recommendation letter for the strangler?" Carolyn inquired over her glasses as Eve wafted past her.
"No," Eve replied breezily. "I haven't written it yet."
Eve was aware of the raised eyebrow look that comment garnered her from Elena, who was in the process of sorting out the post.
"Haven't written… Eve, his hearing is on Wednesday." Carolyn pointed out.
"That's why I'm here. To write it." Eve remarked over her shoulder. Throughout their exchange she had barely slowed her pace at all.
She knew this wasn't like her. She knew that the other occupants of the office saw her as a stickler for the rules when it came to her cases. She was never late to appointments, she filled out paperwork properly and promptly, she could recite her psychological diagnoses as though she were reading straight from one of the journals she had submitted multiple articles to. In fact, many of the others in the office didn't like her for precisely those reasons. Elena was her only real friend here. And she had only switched from mildly disinterested in Eve to quietly amused after witnessing an inebriated Eve at a former colleague's leaving drinks. To this day, Elena didn't know she had in fact witnessed Eve's only reaction to her father's then-recent death. After Elena had sidled over to Eve and clinked their wine glasses together approvingly, the two had become gradual friends. And as for Carolyn, she and Eve shared a mutual respect but not a lot beyond that.
"You've got half an hour!" Elena called to Eve's retreating back, "Then I am coming in for a chat."
Eve waved her hand over her shoulder in response to Elena and pretended she didn't hear Carolyn's subsequent comment.
"Hasn't even written it." Carolyn murmured, "Extraordinary."
"Right?" Elena agreed.
Eve ignored them both and continued down the corridor and into her office, shutting the door firmly behind her.
Twenty minutes later found Eve scrolling through Google images for an appropriately sized line drawing of the Korean flag that she could colour in for Leo's family tree project. Of course, she could let him colour it. But it would be a mess. And besides, Niko had coloured in the Polish flag and therefore Eve's Korean flag needed to look just as neat. Not that she was competitive. She would just print one of these and then she would get on with her letter of recommendation for the strangler.
It was a pretty simple case really. The man was not suitable for release. He needed further therapy and extensive rehabilitation and then another assessment, hopefully by somebody other than Eve. He was a textbook example of someone who had felt emasculated in his youth and powerless into adulthood, who asserted dominance over women by strangling them. He wasn't interesting to Eve. In their sessions together he made no remark that altered her opinion of him. Their hours together had been tedious.
"Knock, knock!" Came a voice from the door.
"You know," said Eve, without removing her eyes from the computer screen as Elena sauntered in, "You wouldn't have to say 'knock knock' if you actually knocked."
"How's the report going?" Elena asked, entirely disregarding Eve's remark. "I can't believe you're doing it the day before. Eve Polastri, being reckless, who knew?"
"I have my moments." Eve replied dryly, still scrolling through images of the Korean flag.
Elena rolled her eyes.
"Sure babe." She uttered disbelievingly.
Eve glanced over the monitor at Elena. She had been telling the truth. If she cast her mind back, there had been times that she had acted recklessly. Those times often coincided with moments of emotional trauma, but still, Eve wasn't quiteas straight-laced as her colleagues seemed to assume. She strived to remain professional when she was, well, at work. That was all.
"What's the hold up with this report then anyway?" Elena asked, rounding the desk and crouching next to Eve's office chair.
Eve wasn't quite quick enough to minimise the webpage.
"Oh, OK," Elena said, nodding slowly, "I see the problem. These are pixelated images of Japanese flags, not a word document." She added sagely.
"Korean flags." Eve corrected.
"Still not Word though, is it?" Elena asked, elbowing Eve in the ribs.
Eve sighed.
"It's for some school project of Leo's. I have to colour one in for him." She explained.
"I thought Niko dealt with all that sort of stuff. Surely he can colour in a little flag? The man is literally a professional artist." Elena asked, waving her hand about dismissively.
Eve groaned.
"He's done his part. But I kind of dropped the ball on this one. I was meant to be there to help Leo with my side of the family tree but… I wasn't." Eve trailed off.
"Family Tree?" Elena asked.
Eve opened her mouth to reply but closed it as Elena cut in.
"Don't tell me, I'm sure it's boring." Elena said, shaking her head quickly, "Where were you then?"
Eve paused for a moment, unsure how to answer.
"With a client and then stuck in traffic." She answered. Not a lie.
"Wait. Was this a few days back?" Elena suddenly queried, causing Eve to furrow her brows in confusion.
"Yeah. Why?" Eve asked suspiciously.
"Niko called here asking for you." Elena said conversationally.
"He... what?" Eve stuttered.
"Yeah. I told him you hadn't been in. And then he sort of hung up." Elena explained thoughtfully.
"Just hung up?" Eve asked.
"Well, he said bye, but yeah, pretty much. Actually, he seemed a bit pissed off." Elena concluded.
"No shit." Eve muttered, and then raised her voice, "I can't believe he called here."
"He was only wondering where you were." Elena said reasonably.
"He could just trust me." Eve said quietly, finally selecting her chosen flag and hitting print, just as Elena let out a loud bark of laughter.
"Wait!" She exclaimed, "Does Van Gogh think you're having an affair or something?!"
Eve looked up at her quickly.
"No! I mean, I don't think so…" She began.
"Can you imagine?" Elena laughed, "You? Playing away? That's hilarious."
Eve wasn't sure whether to be hurt by that reaction or not. Elena seemed unable to conceive of the idea that Eve could possibly be involved in something as exciting as an extra marital affair. Eve strove to be seen as professional, not boring. She also wasn't sure how to respond to Elena's remark, so she said nothing. After a few moments, Elena stopped laughing and stared at Eve with wide eyes.
"Fucking hell. You're not are you?" She asked aghast.
"Of course not." Eve snapped.
"Knew it." Elena nodded, "Plus, you were with a client so not exactly someone likely to be an eligible bachelor. Unless you're into psychopaths." She added, waggling her eyebrows exaggeratedly.
"Hardly." Eve replied firmly, before spinning in her chair to snatch the printed sheet from the printer behind her and holding the flag outline up for scrutiny. Elena pulled it from her hand and slapped it down on the desk.
"So… the report?" Elena asked pointedly.
"Yeah. I'm going to do it now." Eve sighed.
"Cool." Elena replied, "Stick it on my desk on your way out? I'll make sure it gets where it needs to be."
"Will do." Eve murmured, finally pulling up a word document on the computer screen.
"Thank-you Eve," Elena sing-songed, before standing up and heading to the door.
"If Niko ever calls again, I'll tell him you said something about an appointment at a motel off the M25." She added with a wink.
"Perfect. Thanks." Eve replied with a sarcastic smile.
Elena laughed and left the room, pulling the door shut behind her.
Eve ran her fingers through her hair. It was a habit she'd had for years and she closed her eyes at the soothing scrape of her nails against her scalp. Was that really what Niko had thought? Was that the real reason for all his digs about her being late home? Was it not about their son at all? No, that didn't seem right. His frustration seemed mostly directed at what he saw as her substandard parenting. And yet he had called the office when she was visiting Oksana. That action did reek of mistrust.
Eve tapped her fingers over the keyboard, writing an initial cursory line of the report. The bloody thing should write itself really. She had done enough of these things by now. She could do it in half an hour. It's an easy one, dull and predictable. It wasn't holding Eve's attention today. She couldn't concentrate.
One day she would have to write one of these for Oksana. Eve almost laughed to herself. That report would be anything but easy, dull and predictable. At this moment in time, she didn't know what she would write for the other women. Abouther, Eve corrected herself, not for her. Normally, Eve could tell pretty early on in her appointments with a client which way her report would go, whether it would lead to freedom or further imprisonment. It was wrong to decide ahead of time, of course, but after the amount of years Eve had been doing this, she had become pretty adept at picking up signs and spotting similarities to previous cases.
Not with Oksana though. She was… something else.
Eve shook her head vigorously. She needed to concentrate and write this report. But perhaps she should ring Bill and see how Oksana was doing. Or at least ask whether she would be out of the hospital bay in time for their appointment. No. He would call her if Oksana weren't well enough, she didn't need to call especially to find out.
At that moment, Eve's mobile phone started ringing from its spot on her desk. She snatched it up at once.
"Hello?" Eve asked immediately.
"Woah." Came Elena's voice, "That was the fastest you've ever answered. Anyone would think you were waiting for your fancy man to call!"
Eve held back an unamused growl.
"What do you want, Elena?" She sighed.
"How's that report going?" Elena asked teasingly.
"Fantastic. It's nearly done." Eve lied.
"Cool." Elena replied. "I'm bored. Can I colour in the flag?"
Eve laughed in surprise and then regained composure.
"Only if you do it neatly." She said resolutely.
"You have my word." Elena replied solemnly.
"Come and pick it up then." Eve let out with a laugh.
"Be right there!" Elena exclaimed and then hung up.
Eve laughed again, and then her eyes landed on the still predominantly blank Word document in front of her, and her laughter abated swiftly. She typed another couple of lines and then paused. Why on earth had she thought that phone call might be another from Bill?