The next morning, I am awoken by Velora's high-pitched voice. "Time to get up! We leave in a couple of hours!"

I groan once I hear her footsteps recede. I get up and take the final hot shower of my stay and then dress. I go for the simplest thing I can find. Black pants and a green t-shirt. I look around the room, and it's then that I realize that my ring from the Everdeens is on the bedside table. I quickly pick it up and place it on my right hand. I smile at it, knowing that I will see them soon.

I make my way out to the dining room and see that no one else is around. I grab a plate and pile it full of breakfast foods. I won't have food like this for much longer. Sure, I'll have enough money to buy plenty of food, but it won't be of this quality.

I sit and start to eat and Velora darts into the room. "Oh, good. You're up!" She smiles at me. "I have some things to attend to. I will be back!" She sings as she leaves the room, and down the elevator.

I am about halfway through my breakfast when Haymitch enters the room. He gives me a smile as he passes to get his breakfast. He puts just a small amount of food on his plate and then comes to sit next to me. "Ready to go home, Darling?" He asks me before taking a bite of his food. I notice too, that he only has water and orange juice in front of him. No liquor this morning.

I smile. "Not really. I just want to hide away." He lifts an eyebrow and I continue, "They will look at me differently, won't they?"

"Only some. Mostly with sympathy. At first, most people will just be happy that you won. They get food because you won."

"Oh, right. I forgot about that." I nod. "What about Sky's family?"

"We will just have to find out." He tells me. I nod and look down to my plate. "Don't worry, Darling. You'll still have me." I look at him with a grin, and he is smirking back at me.

"Ugh, don't remind me." I feign disgust. He grins, but just continues eating.

Eventually, we are ushered to the train. I fight my way through the crowd. Everyone wants to touch a Victor. People are grabbing me, and I am having a hard time staying with my small group, so Haymitch grabs my hand and pulls me as close to him as he can and ends up wrapping an arm around me to keep me from getting pulled into the crowd.

Once we are safely in the train, I look out and smile and wave to everyone until the train pulls out. I turn from the window to see Haymitch watching me.

"Good. You're still playing the game." He nods approvingly at me.

"You told me I had to." I remind him.

He laughs. "I did. It's odd to have one of my Tributes actually listen to me."

I smirk. "I am a Victor, sir, and don't you forget it!" I say, making him stand.

"Yes, my apologies," He sinks down into a bow, "madam Victor."

I laugh and he stands back up. He holds his hand out, "Come with me. I have something to show you."

I take his hand and he leads me through the train. We pass door after door, and finally come to a door that opens in front of us. He leads me through it and am taken aback by the brightness in the car. We are in the back of the train, and the whole back and half of the roof of the train is all windows. You can watch everything pass.

"This is beautiful, Haymitch." I tell him, looking out the windows at the back. I walk over and sit on the couch that is facing out the back of the train.

"I thought you might like it." He tells me, sitting next to me. We sit for a minute before he speaks. "I want you to be prepared." I look at him, meeting his eyes as he talks. "You are going to be overwhelmed when you see everyone."

"I am excited to see my mom and sister." I smile.

"Yes, but the whole thing will be seen by all of District 12 and televised to the rest of Panem. You still can't cry. You need to be tough."

"I won't let them see me cry." I tell him.

"Good." With that he stands and starts walking toward the door.

"Wait!" I stand up and stare at him as he stops. "I have a question for you."

He turns back to me. "Out with it, Darling." There is no smile, but his face is kind.

"Last night," I look to the floor for a moment, "What was that?" I look at him again, but find that his eyes are on the floor, now.

"Let's have this conversation once we settle back into our lives in Twelve. Things are different now than they will be." He looks at me now, and his face has lost its arrogance. He isn't the arrogant young drunk that runs around the Capitol or District 12, he is a young man looking like he has been rejected.

"Are you going to be sober so we can have that conversation?" I ask.

His eyes harden slightly, filling with determination. "I will." With that, he leaves me alone in the rear car. I sit back down on the couch and stare out the window, watching the world go by.

~oOo~

After many hours, we finally arrive back home. Haymitch stands behind me as the train doors hiss open, revealing the mass of people gathered at the small train station, if it can even be called a station. There are cameras pointed at me as I smile out at the crowd.

The crowd isn't cheering loudly like the people of the Capitol did. District 12 is much calmer. They smile and a few people wave when they see me, but over all, it is fairly quiet.

I exit the train, Velora and Haymitch right behind me. I finally see my mom and Birch. They are standing at the front of the crowd, smiling and waving at me. I smile back and wave, I feel my throat tighten, but I will not allow myself to cry. They do not get to see me like that.

The mayor comes and congratulates me on my victory, and welcomes another Victor to District 12. The crowd does cheer here, because they know that they will get food for a year following my win. I smile too, knowing that the people of my district might not be as hungry.

I can see that Haymitch has been drinking. He is holding himself together, but is obviously drunk. Velora comes over and talks about how she knew I was a winner when she pulled my name. No one claps when she finishes speaking. I am finally allowed to walk down and greet my family.

I walk to them calmly, and they seem to notice that I am still acting for the cameras, because neither of them does anything too wild that would make me cry. My mom hugs me, and quickly releases me and Birch calmly hugs me. She doesn't throw herself at me like she normally would. She can sense the seriousness of it all.

I do not cry the whole day. There are festivities in my honor, and it is wonderful to see all of the poor District 12 kids run around playing and swinging delectable foods from the Capitol around. I smile at the children, and their parents, who for once don't look tired and stressed. Their kids will be coming home with full bellies tonight.

Finally, I see the camera crews pack up and leave. I look to Haymitch, who has stayed near me the whole day. "Can I go home?" I ask him quietly.

"Yes. Then I can, too." He grins.

I smile. "Well, goodnight, Haymitch. I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Oh yes. You get to pick your house tomorrow."

I had forgotten about that. I get a house in the Victor's Village now. "Well, see you tomorrow, then."

I walk over to my mom. "Let's go home."

Mom nods, and Birch smiles as we head home. The walk is long, but very peaceful. None of us are making any sudden moves. All of us waiting to really greet each other until we are safe within our house.

I open the rickety door and enter the house. I look around. Nothing has changed. Birch's books lay open on the table, a little toy sitting on top of the book. I hear the door shut behind me and then there is silence.

I turn around and look at Mom and Birch. They are staring at me, waiting for me to make the first move. I open my arms, and both of them fly towards me. I have one arm wrapped around my mom and the other wrapped around my little sister. I squeeze them both tightly, finally letting myself cry.

Tears fall from my cheeks onto my family. I start to sob. The cries wracking my body, I am shaking. My mom is crying, holding me tighter. Birch is shaking in my arms. We hold each other until finally we are cried out.

They pull away from me, and Birch speaks first. "Thank you for coming home."

The tears threaten to start again and I nod in response.

"The Everdeen's came by when you won. They said that you would be home soon. They ate dinner with us, and then reminded us that you wouldn't be the same now." Mom said. "Your eyes. They are holding so much emotion."

"I know." I tell her.

"What happened in there doesn't define you. Remember that. You were in an impossible situation." Mom tells me, tears in her eyes.

"I don't want to talk about it." I tell her, and turn to Birch. "How has school been?"

"Really? You just come home and you want to talk about school?" She whines.

"Well, what do you want to talk about?"

"What was it like in the Capitol?" Her eyes are wide, curious. We only get to see glimpses of things in the Capitol, usually what is broadcast during the games.

"Oh, it was okay." I tell her as I sit down at our small table.

"Just okay?" She says as she plops down into the chair next to me. Mom sits across the table, listening to us.

"The people are really weird." I tell them. "But the food is amazing!" I start to describe some of the food, but it's difficult since no one in District 12 could ever imagine the flavors that the Capitol food contains.

We talk for a while, and I tell them about the nicer parts of the stay. No one brings up the games or my allies, thankfully. We eventually get ready for bed, and I toss and turn for a while before falling into a fitful sleep plagued by dreams of Birch falling into a pit of lava.

~oOo~

The next day, the camera crews follow as I pick out my new house in the Victor's Village. I can tell what house belongs to Haymitch since it is the only one that doesn't look as kept up as the empty ones. I end up making a stupid excuse to choose the house directly across from my new friend.

Once the house is picked, Velora says her goodbye. "Raven, I will be back in six months for the Victory Tour. Start thinking of a talent! Everyone will want to see what the newest Victor has been up to!" She sings. "I am so excited to go home. I have already accepted tens -maybe even hundreds- of invitations to parties and dinners since I pulled the Victor of this year's games!" She quickly kisses my cheek and scurries away, wobbling down the gravel path in her heels.

I told Mom and Birch to start packing while I was out picking a new house. I really don't want to live alone. I need people around me. The silence would be too much. Maybe that is part of Haymitch's problem. He doesn't have anyone making noise around him, he's just stuck with his thoughts and memories.

I go back to gather my things and my family. They are ready to go when I get back.

"Did you pick us a big house?" Birch asks.

"I only had big houses to choose from." I remind her.

She sighs, a smile on her face. "That Penny Deansbury is going to have a cow!"

"Who?" I ask.

"Penny Deansbury. She has been telling everyone that I can't really read and now that my sister is rich, I won't have to. But I'll have a nice house and she won't. I'll even have my own bedroom!"

"Birch. You can't be rude to the others just because we have a house." I tell her. "I'd rather the games had never happened."

She is quiet and nods her head. "Sorry."

"Let's go."

We take the few belongings that we determined to be worth taking and walk to the Victor's Village. The walk is long, especially since we are each carrying two bags full of clothes, and other items of sentimental value.

We walk through the arch into the neighborhood of large homes, Birch's eyes wide the whole time. I stop in the middle of the street and smirk at her.

"Which one?" She asks.

"Guess."

"Oh my god!" She looks around, her gaze stopping on each house. She points down about three houses, "that one?"

"Nope." I grin at her. "One more guess."

"That one," she points to another, "has the prettiest roof."

"It's this one." I say, and point to the house I chose.

"Well, that one's boring." She grumbles, but happily skips toward the house.

I laugh, and gesture for Mom to follow us.

Once inside, everyone is quiet. We all search the house, looking at all the plush, unused furniture, vases and odd decorations. We head upstairs and Birch runs between all the bedrooms. There are five all together, and she opens each door, peaks in, and runs to the next one.

She finally stops and points to a door. "This one's yours."

"Why?"
"It's the biggest." She states before walking down a couple rooms and walking in. "This one's mine." She looks back at me. "Second biggest."

I laugh at her as she walks inside. I take my things to the room that she has declared the biggest and mom takes one between our rooms.

We take a couple hours to settle in and unpack. Mom decides to run to town to get food for dinner. Birch accompanies her, leaving me in the house alone.

It's too quiet. I move around the house, looking for something to do, something to keep my mind active and away from the intrusive thoughts. Eventually, I come to a window that faces the street. I stare at Haymitch's house. The curtains are drawn, and the house looks dark, but I know that he is home. And probably drunk.

I exit the house and walk across the street. I walk up to his door and knock. It is very quiet for a few moments before I knock again. "I know you're home!" I shout at the door.

I hear a chair slide across the wood floor and the footsteps that get louder as he approaches the door. The door opens, and Haymitch looks at me before stepping aside and gesturing for me to come in.

His house is a mess. Garbage laying everywhere. "Haymitch, do you ever clean?"

"No, I usually drink." He says, as he walks into the kitchen. I follow and see a kitchen that doesn't match the rest of the house. It is almost spotless. There are a few stains on the wood floor, and on the counters, but there is no garbage, and the smell of the house isn't as strong in here. "But I have been trying to stay mostly sober."

I smirk. "So, you cleaned?"

"So, I cleaned." He gestures for me to sit at the table, and I do, and then sets a glass of water down for me. He sits in the chair next to me and looks at me. "Did you really have to pick the house directly across from mine?"

"Of course, I did." I tell him. "I had to make sure that I could bother you whenever I desire."

"You don't bother me." He says, looking over at me.

"Well, then I'm not doing my job." I chuckle. "That can be my talent! Annoying Haymitch!"

He laughs. "That seems to be everyone's talent."

"I'm glad you're trying." I tell him. I know it isn't easy for him. He is so used to being drunk, his own anesthesia to the world.

"For you, I am trying." He looks around the room, like he is deciding something. "Let's take a walk."

I nod, and we both stand. I follow him out of the house. He stays quiet as he quickly walks out of the Victor's Village. "Where are we going?" He holds up a finger and continues walking.

We make our way to the meadow. He walks to the center, standing in an open field. "Haymitch, what are we doing out here?"

"I had to take you somewhere where there is less of a chance of being overheard." He explains.

"Overheard?"

"You never know where they have ears."

"You think they bugged the houses?" I ask him.

"You never know."

"What was so important that you can't be overheard?"

He stares at me for a moment, a hand reaches out toward me before he turns away from me, muttering "god dammit."

"Haymitch?" I grab his hand and turn him back to face me. "What?"

"Do you know what they did to me?" He asks, eyes glaring into mine.

"What do you mean?"

"I didn't do what they wanted me to do. Do you know how they retaliated?"

I shake my head.

"They – Snow – killed my entire family. Everyone I cared about – gone." He looks into my eyes. Determined. "You have to know who you're dealing with. If they ask you – no, tell you – to do something, just know what is at risk."

"You mean, he will kill my family?" I ask, eyes wide. "He can't! They didn't do anything!"

"I know. But he will. They are your motivation to keep you in line."

"I'm sorry, Haymitch." I tell him. I cant even imagine how it must feel to have everyone you care about ripped from you like that. No wonder he drinks.

"Don't be sorry. Just don't make the same mistakes I did."

"I'll try." I smirk at him. "You just can't stop mentoring me, can you?"

He laughs at this. "I have never met someone more in need of mentoring."

I stare at him for a moment. He is still smiling, blonde hair falling around his face. His eyes crinkle at the corners when he smiles big enough, and his eyes hold all the sadness and anger that I feel. I walk closer to him and grab the sides of his face. I look into his eyes for a moment, giving him the chance to refuse me. Instead, his arms wrap around my waist and he pulls me to him, our lips meeting in the middle.

I don't know how long we stay like this as his lips move against mine. My hands move to his hair, his arms stay tight around me. I feel secure for the first time since my name was called.

He pulls away and leans his forehead against mine. "If we do this," he starts, "that is giving him leverage over me and more over you."

"If being scared of him keeps us from living, he already won."

"We can't have that, can we?" He smirks.

"Never." I kiss him again.

We end up sitting in the grass of the meadow. He asks me about my family, and I tell him stories of Birch and I. He starts opening up about his own family. Just small things, his moms favorite color was pink but she really just liked any bright, happy color. I tell him something, and he returns it with something of his own. Neither of us talks about the games, the Capitol or President Snow. We have decided to live our lives.