Title: Your love I want it all too much
Warnings: mentions of abuse (physical and verbal.) Not detailed, but feel free to ask if you are concerned. Also, spoilers for the Ghibli movie Grave of Fireflies if that upsets anyone lol. It's been out for a minute so we figured it would be fine.
Reviews:
MarciaChapter2: thank you so much! Glad you liked those parts! This was a fun chapter! And we loved the confrontation with Adam. It's definitely not the last time! ;) We love writing scheming Brittany too! So much fun! You are too sweet though. We are definitely not Santana level of snarky, I promise. I (K) cry at literally anything and A has a sassy sense of humor, but we try to be nice. We are only mean on the inside haha. I'm also probably (definitely) a little bit in love with Santana so there's that. :) You are too kind.
Iris 7124: we loved the confrontation too! There's more to come for sure! ;) and Sebastian will make an appearance very soon too! So glad you liked it lol. This chapter will have more of the three of them! And Dylan isn't done either! Those are some of our favorite scenes to write!
Guest (LonelyBeth): thank you! We update it every Wednesday with a new chapter! So glad you found us and we hope you enjoy this update!
onyx115: haha we hope you enjoy the wooing! We know who we would choose, but Kurt's gonna need a minute lol.
Thank you for all the reviews and favorites. It's always a kick in the butt to write and something that makes us smile when we are having a bad day.
To absolutely no one's surprise, this one is quite long lol. We would apologize if we had any shame but that's long gone.
Friday afternoon May
Kurt, you have to choose - Blaine
I know! Just give me more time! It's too much pressure! -Kurt
You're out of time. Choose now! -Blaine
That's so unfair! *crying face emoji* -Kurt
Life is unfair, sweetheart. Now, stop avoiding it and choose -Blaine
Okay okay! I guess if I had to choose… without the PROPER time to really think about it… It'd have to be all four! I can't choose and you can't make me! -Kurt
That's cheating and not what I asked. -Blaine
No, because it makes sense! I'm sarcastic like Dorothy, flirty like Blanche, sweet like Rose, and feisty like Sophia. I love them all and I don't care what you say -Kurt
You are cheating, but I guess I'll let it slide because you're so pretty *kissey face emoji* -Blaine
*smirk emoji* you're too sweet -Kurt
And pretty too? *pleading face emoji* -Blaine
You're okay -Kurt
*skull and cross bones emoji, gravestone emoji* -Blaine
I'm dead. You killed me with your meanness -Blaine
*laughing face emoji* -Kurt
What are you doing right now? -Blaine
Is this a ghost? pretty sure Blaine died -Kurt
Ha. Ha. HA. -Blaine
Seriously, come hang out with me -Blaine
*sends picture of him and Kit* -Kurt
You two are adorable -Blaine
It's way too late notice to get a sitter. You know this -Kurt
I know that! Why else would we be going for a walk in the park? -Blaine
*sends picture of Blaine in the park glaring suspiciously at some birds*
Hurry! They are going to get me! -Blaine
You want me to come with Kit? You're comfortable with that? -Kurt
Yes. I'll buy you both ice cream. Please come save me from the birds -Blaine
Kurt arrived at the park Blaine had sent him directions to about thirty minutes later pushing Kit in a stroller. He found Blaine sitting on a bench dressed in his usual attire of dark distressed jeans, a tight grey t-shirt, and his heavy boots. He was bent over a notebook, a pen in his hand while his other played an imaginary melody on his thigh. He had gotten a hair cut and looked really nice. Kurt's stomach swooped at the sight of him. He was about to call out when Kit caught sight of the man.
"Towah!"
Blaine looked up open-mouthed at the sound, but it spread into a wide smile at the sight of them. He stood and jogged over, notebook still in hand.
"Hey," Blaine said as he gave Kurt a quick kiss on the cheek and then bent to hold his fist out to Kit. The boy still didn't know what to do, but he smiled brightly and reached for Blaine. Gently, Blaine tapped his knuckles to Kit's little hand. "How are you doing, little buddy?"
With a loud screech, Kit grabbed for his arm and inspected all the tattoos there.
"So, ready for a little walk?" Blaine asked as he let the child look his fill. He looked up at Kurt from where he was crouched, squinting a little in the light. They were lined again, making them pop. "I thought we could get our ice cream at that little stand over there and walk around."
"Sounds good." Kurt nodded and they made their way.
Kit got a little strawberry popsicle and the adults got cones for themselves. They ambled slowly along the path, admiring the scenery.
"Were you writing a song earlier?" Kurt asked as he licked his ice cream. He glanced at the rolled up notebook stuck in Blaine's back pocket.
"Yeah. It's not quite done yet, but I would like to show you when I get it finished."
"I'd love that." They shared a smile. Kurt pointed out a squirrel that Kit barely looked at before going back to his rapidly melting popsicle. "Do you come here a lot? Seems like a good place to write. Peaceful."
Blaine laughed a little and chased a drip with his tongue. Kurt tore his eyes away. "Actually, this is the first time I've been here. I've seen it, but never stopped. I thought it would be a great idea for the three of us though."
So he had been looking for a way to include Kit. Kurt was pleased. "I thought that was a sweet idea. Very thoughtful."
"I'm… I'm really trying to do this the right way. Especially since I didn't really handle it the right way at first." He gave Kit a meaningful glance.
This would be a good opening. He had mentioned a few things about it before. Kurt wouldn't push, but he could at least ask. "And why is that? If you don't want to talk about it, it's okay. I guess I'm just a little confused at the back and forth."
"I don't mind talking about it. It is what it is." Blaine took a really deep breath and threw away his trash.
When he launched into his story, it was matter-of-fact, like he had told it a thousand times. As if it didn't bother him.
"Cooper and I are six years apart, but we have always been close. We were always there for each other when no one else was, especially my mother and father. I think our parents have hated us from minute one. Honestly, I'm shocked they didn't drown us or something. My mother did say she tried to have a miscarriage with me which is probably what made me the way I am."
Kurt tried not to look too shocked. From comments he had previously made, Kurt gathered things weren't great with the Anderson parents, but this…
"Cooper was always too loud, I was always too quiet. Cooper was a philandering whore and I was a sexual pervert because I was gay. Their words.
"When I was twelve, Cooper turned eighteen and he had to leave. I get it, but it still hurt. He was the only one who really cared about me. He tried to take me with him, but they wouldn't let him. While he kept in touch, he had to live his life and I couldn't be upset about that. After he moved, that was the first time I really got depressed. I tried to make it without him, I did. For two years. During that time, I came out, got gay bashed at a Sadie Hawkins dance, and snuck out to get my first tattoo. Then another." He pointed to a faded tattoo near his shoulder that looked like lyrics. "It's from a Katy Perry song. I was so cool, right? Anyway, they were so fucking pissed. I started not giving a fuck and developed a temper. They came home one day and I had a boy in my room I was giving head to and things escalated." A dark look crossed his face and he touched the scar that cut through his eyebrow. "This was the last thing they gave me. The police were called, social services, and then Cooper. He legally adopted me and brought me out here and I've never looked back. So when I say I don't know what a parent looks like, I promise I'm not being an asshole, I genuinely have no clue.
"Last year, I trusted someone I thought was a friend and he stole our song we both wrote. I was hurt and angry, but I thought, fuck him. I'll just write something better. But I couldn't come up with anything and I got so fucking depressed that I just got in bed and didn't get out. I started to think what my parents had said about me my whole life had some merit and I was washed up. My friends and Cooper helped me out of the hole I was in, but I still felt dead inside. I just kind of pushed through for them. Then I met you…"
Kurt looked up at him sharply, tears welled up in his eyes from his story. He couldn't imagine the pain Blaine went through. Blaine just smiled.
"I started feeling things I hadn't felt in so long. I started to have songs come to me again like they used to. You kind of saved me, just by being you. Then this little guy inspired me too." He bent to ruffle Kit's hair. "So yeah, I wanted to apologize for having a knee jerk reaction to you telling me you had a little boy. All I could think about was how terrible I would be with him and I felt like I would ruin everything. But I want to be with you. I want to give you back just as much life as you've given me."
At all that, Kurt needed a second to figure out how to respond. He knelt to wipe off Kit's sticky face and wrestle the popsicle stick from his grip to buy himself time. He was flattered that Blaine thought of him so highly, horrified at his childhood, and a little unsure how to proceed. One thing was certain: it did bring Blaine's reactions into stark understanding.
"Thank you for telling me… Uh…"
"It's okay. You don't have to say anything right now. I kind of trauma dumped. Sorry." Blaine stuffed his hands into his pockets. "I was just trying to explain myself. You can think about it and tell me what your thoughts are later."
There was something bothering him though. He stood and folded his arms. "Thank you. But… The way your parents treated you… You didn't deserve that. You understand that, right?"
Blaine gave him a little half smile and shrugged. "Yeah they suck. But let's not talk about them please. I just want to relax."
They moved on to talk of other things after that that were considerably less heavy like the photo shoot Blaine did and how their jobs were going. Eventually they happened upon a little bench and decided to sit down for a few minutes to enjoy the flower laden breeze. Kurt let Kit out to stumble around and explore. Of course he immediately plopped himself in the dirt right next to their legs and began stacking the smooth rocks he found on top of each other like a precarious tower.
"Anyway, we finished right at the deadline and I am pretty sure I collapsed afterwards." Kurt finished his story and sucked in a breath when Blaine took his hand. He started massaging it, first rolling his fingers gently, then he stroked his calloused fingers from the tips of Kurt's fingers, past his knuckles, down the back of his hand. Kurt's throat clicked as he swallowed hard at the treatment. "Oh… that feels… that feels nice. Never thought I would enjoy a hand massage."
"I'm really good at hand jobs." Blaine grinned and held on when Kurt tried to pull away. "Aw, come on. It's just a joke! I'm sorry!" He gave Kurt his biggest, saddest puppy dog eyes and drew his hand to his mouth. "Please forgive me?" He kissed his wrist first, then his palm, and then his fingers. His lips were soft on his hand and it melted him a little. He stopped trying to pull away, but tore his eyes away from Blaine's before he did something foolish.
The massage continued with Blaine making circles in his palm with his thumbs. Kurt relaxed into it and sighed. "That's nice. My hand hurts from all the sewing I've been doing. I'm way out of practice and it's kind of embarrassing."
"What have you been working on? New designs?"
"My outfit for the gala." He held back a groan when Blaine's nails lightly scratched at his arm. "I may have been a little overzealous. It's black velvet with a jewel encrusted collar and shoulders and it kind of has tails. The trousers are less involved, but all the embroidery and beading has been a pain."
"I look forward to seeing it in person. Thanks for the invite, by the way. Maybe you can help me figure out what to wear." Blaine arched a brow at Kurt's confused look. "What?"
"Are you talking about the gala? At Vogue?"
"Yeah." Blaine's hands ceased their ministrations. "I got the email." His amusement dimmed at Kurt's complete confusion. "So, you didn't invite me?"
"No," Kurt shook his head.
Blaine's face fell, but he just shrugged it off and continued to massage Kurt's hand. "Maybe it was a mistake or something. I won't come if it makes you uncomfortable. Honestly, I thought it was just you tossing more work my way—"
"Work?"
Blaine nodded. "Yeah, I'm opening for your friends? But like I said, I don't have to—"
"No, it's fine."
They were quiet for a minute while they both processed and Kurt racked his brain for who might have invited Blaine. He knew it wasn't him, and Adam definitely wouldn't have. After sort of catching them in his office the other day, Adam had insisted upon a long, tedious conversation about being honest and basically trying to convince him that he shouldn't be dating Blaine, but Kurt just insisted he knew what he was doing and it wasn't Adam's business. He reiterated that didn't have to continue dating Kurt if he was uncomfortable, but Adam backed off immediately. Truthfully, he had been kind of angry at Adam and had been ignoring him because of the way he was treating him. Sure, it was kind of petty, but he would not be treated like a child when he had been transparent about the whole situation with both men. What he did with one wasn't the other's business.
That left the one other person he had tasked with staffing the gala.
"Brittany…" Kurt whispered with narrowed eyes.
"What?" Blaine looked over to Kurt, startled from his own thoughts.
"Nothing."
Blaine smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. Kurt found himself wanting to make him really smile again. "Now, are the hand massage rules the same as regular hand jobs? Like, do I return the favor or…?"
That surprised a laugh out of Blaine and he curled his fingers around Kurt's. The simple act warmed his heart more than it really should have, but he didn't let himself think too hard about it.
"How about you just let me take care of you now and you can massage a part of my choice later." Blaine winked and Kurt felt warm all over again. He squeezed Blaine's hand. This was nice. The flirting and the sexiness was fun, but this… Walking in the park with Kit and holding hands on a bench was another level. Kurt let himself just enjoy it without over thinking too much.
He ended up catching Blaine's eyes and they shared a look, the breeze batting around Blaine's curls. Kurt's heart thumped so hard he was sure Blaine could hear it, but a little whine pulled their attention down to Kit.
He had Blaine's jeans clutched in his little fists as he tried to pull himself into Blaine's lap. Blaine froze, his hands fluttering as he wasn't sure what to do. Kit's eyes pleaded as he tried to climb up Blaine's legs and the man just stared at him.
"Uh, you think he wants another popsicle?" Blaine scratched at his head.
And just as quickly as Kurt's heart started to lose itself, he yanked it back. He needed to be careful. Blaine was sweet and sexy, but more and more it seemed like he wasn't what Kurt needed when it came to Kit.
Kit was growing more frustrated and Blaine just stared at him, confused and bewildered. Kurt sighed.
"He wants you to pick him up." He made a grabbing motion with his hands and Blaine chewed his lip.
"Uh, you sure? I don't want to hurt him…"
"It will hurt his feelings if you don't."
Blaine's mouth dropped open at that and he looked down at the boy.
Kit's face had gone red and the whine had turned to almost crying. "Towah!"
He hesitantly reached down to lift the boy. Getting what he wanted now, Kit scrambled into Blaine's lap and immediately began to try to pull his lips off of his face.
He jerked back. "Oh my god! Kurt! What's he doing?"
Kurt reached for him and tried to pull Kit to his own lap. "Not sure. Sorry. Kit, come here sweetie."
"Ow."
"Kit! Leave him alone!"
Blaine blew out his lips which startled the child, but then he thought it was hilarious and started laughing. Blaine couldn't help his smile and he did it again, making Kit laugh even harder. Then he copied Blaine, but it was mostly spit. Blaine flinched when the slobber hit his face and held Kit away from him. "Ew."
His earlier flirtatiousness dissolving into into embarrassment, Kurt reached out for his son. "Kit, come here."
Kit saw Kurt trying to grab him and latched onto Blaine's neck with an iron grip. "No, dada!"
Kurt gasped. "Did you just say no? You come here!"
"No! Towah mine!" He held Blaine tighter, causing him to choke a little.
"Christopher! You let Blaine go right now!"
"No. Mine."
"He is not yours!"
"Mine Towah!"
"Is he calling me flower?" Blaine asked, slightly strangled. "I think you're making it worse, Kurt."
Kurt huffed and backed off. He crossed his arms. "You little tyrant."
Kit eased up once Kurt sat down and continued his exploration of Blaine's face.
"Sorry, Blaine."
The biker gave him a slightly uncomfortable grin as Kit tried to stick his fingers up his nose. "It's okay. I'll get used to it." Blaine sneezed.
Kurt shook his head. He pointed to Blaine. "Kit? Who is this?"
Kit looked from Kurt to Blaine and giggled. "Towah."
Blaine's stiff shoulders relaxed and his eyes softened. "He thinks my name is flower?"
Kurt felt a smile crawl across his own face. "I guess so. I'm sorry. I'll correct him—"
"Nah." Blaine smiled down at the boy who was back to pulling down a piece of Blaine's hair and then letting it spring back into place. "You can call me that, little buddy."
Kurt's heart warmed as he watched Blaine slowly start to relax, his shoulders lowering from his ears and his posture less rigid. Blaine was in the middle of teaching Kit how to do a secret handshake when he sprung it on him.
"So, what are you doing the rest of the night?"
Kurt shrugged. "Just laundry probably. Then more work. Why?"
"So that means you're free tomorrow?"
Kurt brushed the hair away from Kit's forehead. "I think that Adam mentioned doing something."
Blaine made a very mature face at the man's name. "Did he actually ask you out or just expect you to be waiting for him to plan something? Because I want to take you on a date."
"He just asked if I was free but he's never said anything…"
"Then tell him you're busy."
Kurt tried to smother a smile at Blaine's serious face.
"What do you have planned? Because I don't want to leave Kit alone for hours—"
"You won't. I actually have tickets to a play." Blaine shifted a tired looking Kit in his lap. The child had snuggled into his chest and was playing with his hair sleepily. Kurt knew he would have to get him home soon. "I want to do more things with you. Obviously I wanted to do stuff like this—" he indicated the park around them, "—with you both, but I'd like to take you out too. If you want."
Kurt thought for a minute. Adam never had specified and he kind of wanted to go out with Blaine. He agreed. "Fine. Pending whether or not I can get a sitter."
Blaine beamed. "Perfect. I'll pick you up around six and we can go to dinner first."
He helped Kurt get Kit to the car. The boy was practically asleep by the time Kurt strapped him into his car seat.
As Kurt gently shut the door, Blaine barely got out a request for a kiss as Kurt slammed him against the back of Kurt's SUV and attacked. He seemed taken aback at first, but then surrendered to the other man's lips and searching hands. He eagerly pulled Kurt to him and kissed him back hotly, giving just as good as he was given. Kurt was gripping the back of his neck with one hand and caressing his chest with another when he felt Blaine's hands glide down to squeeze his butt. Kurt giggled a little into his mouth at the action and pulled away, eyes sparkling and lips red from the savageness of their mini make out.
"Good night Blaine." Kurt breathed against his lips. He pressed a much softer kiss to his lips then and stroked Blaine's cheek. "And thank you for telling me about your past. I'll really take that into consideration. I'm just glad you felt safe enough with me to open up."
Blaine licked his lips, trying not to moan at how he tasted Kurt there and smiled. "Thank you for listening. And understanding."
After a few less intense kisses, they parted and went their separate ways, both unable to get the kiss or upcoming date off their minds.
Saturday evening-May
Kurt's hands around his waist just felt right. Like they were meant to be there forever. He had kind of felt it the first time he gave Kurt a ride after the debacle at the bar, but then it was more of a realization that he could get used to it. Then it was a sensation of rightness, of maybe they belonged there. Now, as he turned down another street to the restaurant he was currently taking Kurt to on their date, he relished in the contact. Kurt squeezed a little tighter as they made the turn (which he totally did not take a little sharply so Kurt would cuddle up to him more.) Kurt's long, glorious legs were curled up around him and his chin rested on Blaine's shoulder. He kind of wished that their helmets didn't cover their faces so that they could kiss whenever they wanted, but if they were to be thrown the full cover would protect Kurt's beautiful face, so he wasn't too sad about it.
He had given other guys rides of course, boyfriends and flings alike, and most guys did love it. There was an intimacy there, being so close and putting your life in another's hands like that. But until Kurt, he had never really understood just how good it could feel. Kurt shifted behind him and then scooted somehow closer, his knees pressed into Blaine's hips.
Kurt had been a little nervous to take the bike on their date, but there was a gleam in his eyes that Blaine knew would win out. The designer was into it, as many guys were, and Blaine may have exploited that a little so he could be pressed against the other man, but he was only human. Who wouldn't have wanted an excuse to have Kurt Hummel basically wrapped around them?
Exactly.
After reminding Kurt he should leave the car with the car seat for the nanny, he had insisted upon saying hi to Kit and they had left. It was the strangest thing, but he had actually kind of missed the kid after he left from their walk. He wouldn't be opposed to kissing Kurt again like that at the end of this date, but he would have to control his hormones.
This wasn't about having sex, but about showing Kurt he could take him on a proper date without trying to get in his pants. He had layers, thank you very much, and he was going to be a proper gentleman.
They parked at an Italian place that he and Cooper went to all the time and Blaine jumped off before turning to offer a hand to Kurt to help him off of the bike. Kurt smirked at him before taking the hand Blaine decided to not let go. They went in, Blaine opening the door for Kurt.
"Thanks," Kurt said as they made their way to the host. "You're going to spoil me." He grinned as Blaine pulled his chair out for him.
"You deserve to be spoiled. And I'm not going to stop showing you that until you realize how serious I am." Blaine made certain to catch Kurt's eyes as he sat down across from him. He wanted him to understand he wasn't joking. "I know we have been having fun and scratching some itches… I mean, god, I can't keep my hands off of you… But I want to show you that you mean something to me and I won't stop showing you that until you are my boyfriend."
Kurt silently stared at him, obviously caught off guard at his blunt words, pink lips slightly parted. The server approached and saved him from a response, but Blaine was okay with that. He didn't need Kurt to reply, just to hear his motives.
After they ordered and the server had left, Kurt leaned forward on folded hands. "I used the music you gave me for Kit. I played it the other night and he slept really well."
Blaine felt his face grow warm and he smiled a little. He got a cute mental image of Kit asleep and listening to his voice. "He did?"
Kurt nodded with a cute little smile of his own. "Yeah, kind of makes me want you to sing me to sleep."
"That can be arranged," Blaine said with a little wink.
"Oh really?" Kurt's eyes sparkled crystal blue at the suggestion. He circled the pad of his middle finger on the smooth back of his hand. "And what would you record for me?"
Blaine chewed his lip in thought and sat back. He could be flippant and silly, but he didn't want to be a jerk about it. Truthfully, he had thought of thousands of songs he would serenade Kurt with given the chance, but he needed to try and be kind of cool.
Kurt was waiting patiently, a soft smile on his lips.
"Okay, I'd start with Call Me By Your Name by Lil Nas X, then Tear It Up by Queen. I kind of want to fuck you to those songs."
So much for playing it cool. His mouth did whatever it pleased, apparently.
"Oh wow. Not what I was expecting…" Kurt blushed prettily and sipped at his water.
Blaine took the opportunity to continue. "Then maybe an acoustic version of Teenage Dream by Katy Perry…"
"These are probably not going to help me sleep, Blaine." He was still pink, but there was unmistakable heat in his eyes.
"Of course, then I would slow it down. Maybe do some acoustic versions of Walk the Line, Halo by Lewis Watson, and then some original songs I wrote just for you."
Kurt giggled like he was joking about the original songs, but he was one hundred percent serious. It was probably a little embarrassing how many he had written with Kurt in mind.
"Well, that settles it. I need this."
"Maybe I can make a live show happen."
Kurt shook his head with a smile. "Seriously though, how do you not have your own recording contract by now? You're so good."
This time the server saved him by delivering their food and wine they ordered. He tried to think of the least insecure way to say this.
"I guess I just haven't made it yet. It's difficult out here."
Kurt nodded solemnly. "I understand that. I know I played Boq in Wicked, but you know I wanted to be Elphaba or Galinda. No. I wanted Elphaba."
"You might still make it."
"I might. But so can you. I know how hard it is out there, believe me." Kurt's encouraging smile was so sincere it made Blaine ache a little. He was too sweet for his own good.
"Yeah. And people want me to try and use Cooper for his connections to get ahead…"
"But you don't want to do that," Kurt finished. "You want to do this your way." Blaine could only nod. Kurt looked at him knowingly as he cut a bite of his eggplant parmesan. "People said the same thing to me when I was at NYADA and getting nothing while Rachel got Funny Girl. They said I should drop her name to use her. But it always felt wrong to me. Like if I made it, it wouldn't be my own."
Blaine's shoulders relaxed. Kurt got it. "Oh my god, yes. That's what I've been trying to say! Everyone thinks I'm being stupid, but I just know in my gut that it's right."
"Follow your gut, Blaine. It's led me to some of my best decisions." He winked at Blaine and the biker had to return it.
"Me too."
They finished their meal with lighter conversation, mostly about cute things Kit had done and then Blaine told him about how they were getting ready to celebrate Tina's boyfriend's birthday in a few weeks.
They fought over who got to pay for dinner, but Blaine won when he told Kurt it was his idea to come out.
"When you take me out, you can pay."
"Fair enough."
Making their way to the theater, they got cozy in their seats to watch the play.
"So, have you ever seen this play? What's it about?" Kurt asked, excitedly taking in the gorgeous gilded splendor of the theatre. Blaine had to admit Cooper picked a nice one.
"Okay, confession here: I've never actually seen this one, but it looked good. Cooper gave me the tickets and I knew you loved theatre so…" Blaine sucked in his bottom lip hopefully. It would really suck if Kurt was disappointed he didn't pick out this play himself. However, he had nothing to fear.
"I do! I'm excited! I've not been to a show in awhile!" Kurt wiggled in seat in adorable anticipation. He was a grown man who had no business being that cute, but Blaine wanted to kiss him silly.
"Um, excuse me?"
They turned to see a two young women standing there, nervously clutching their phones. Kurt smiled warmly at them and they relaxed marginally.
"We were wondering… Well, we thought it was you— You are Kurt Hummel, right?"
Kurt laughed, not unkindly and the girls blushed. "I am yes. Did you want a picture?"
They nodded eagerly and Blaine offered to take it. They eyed him sharply as if they were trying to figure out if he was famous too. It only took a few minutes and the girls were on their way back to their seats with pink cheeks and happy smiles.
"Stuff like that always scares me a little," Kurt confided in him. "I get so nervous, like what if I say the wrong thing or spell my name wrong on an autograph? Embarrassing."
And Kurt continued to be cuter.
Blaine took his hand. "They loved you and you were amazing with them. Very kind. I am sure that's what they will remember." He kissed Kurt's hand, bringing a small flush to his cheeks.
When the show started, they settled in and enjoyed it at first. It seemed like an interesting play about a boy and his little sister in World War Two era Japan. Kurt even wove his fingers through Blaine's and held it the first half. But then it started to take a turn and got pretty damn depressing. Both men were sobbing along with the rest of the theatre by the end when the siblings died. Blaine didn't even get to enjoy comforting Kurt because he was so upset himself.
"I just…" Kurt abruptly blew his nose as they left the theater, Blaine holding a comforting arm around Kurt's waist. "That was just so sad." He sniffled into his tissue again.
Blaine nodded, sniffing pretty hard himself. His eyes felt all scratchy from the crying. "It was a beautiful play, but shit. That hurt."
"And the end…" Kurt's eyes welled up into a fresh spring of tears.
Blaine mentally smacked himself. He should have checked what the play was about. Of course someone who had lost their own brother wouldn't have wanted to see that play. He was a jerk. And he was going to smack Cooper for getting tickets to this particular play.
"Kurt, I am so fucking sorry. I should have checked the play out before I took you." He rubbed a hand on Kurt's back.
The designer tried to find a usable place on his tissue before Blaine pulled a paper napkin from his pocket he had snagged from the bathroom. Kurt thanked him and made do with it.
"No, it's fine. I found it therapeutic. But definitely not something I want to see again. At least not soon."
They had walked a little ways down the street and found a little fountain circled with golden lights. A violinist played behind her open case accompanied by a guy with a keyboard. Several people had gathered to appreciate the music and toss a few crumpled bills in. Blaine suddenly got a great idea to salvage the night from its very unromantic turn as a familiar song, Like I'm Going To Lose You began.
"Dance with me?"
Kurt glanced around shyly. "Here?" It was kind of adorable that Kurt Hummel, Broadway dream, TV personality, and all around star was acting shy.
"Please?"
Blaine must have cued the puppy dog eyes because Kurt relented pretty quickly and took his hand. Blaine pulled him closer until they were flush, his hands on Kurt's waist and Kurt's on his shoulders. They held eye contact as they came together, soft smiles on their faces as they swayed slowly. Blaine leaned in to kiss Kurt's jaw and then rest his chin on his shoulder. After a few seconds, Kurt let his cheek rest against the top of Blaine's head as they moved together. Holding Kurt like this, dancing with him in the glow of glittering lights after they had spent the evening together… this was something Blaine could get used to. His heart ached at the thought of not keeping Kurt. He just held him a little tighter, never wanting this to end. There were no walls then, no reasons to not be together, just a few moments of closeness and matching heartbeats that Blaine wanted to hold onto forever. Blaine's heart skipped with the realization: he was falling in love with Kurt. He didn't think he was in love yet, but he was in danger of it. If he wanted to get out, he needed to do it now while he could. Except he didn't want to.
They swayed until the song was over and pulled away, Blaine trying to hide the realization from his face by clapping for the musicians who were shooting them some cute looks along with a few other people in the crowd. He dug out a few dollars from his pocket and tossed them into the case along with Kurt and they strolled arm and arm back towards his motorcycle. No words were said, but Blaine knew something big had passed between them. He just hoped Kurt felt it too.
It was late by the time they made it to Kurt's and he eyed the darkened house with longing. He really wished they could go in together and finish this date the way god intended. But he was being a gentleman tonight.
Blaine helped Kurt off the bike and they stood in front of it, Blaine tossing his helmet up into the air while Kurt clasped his hands behind him. He was eyeing Blaine with amusement which made Blaine give him a little playful smile back.
"What?"
"I had a great time tonight." He nibbled his bottom lip and Blaine tried not to fixate on the action. "I mean, the play was kind of depressing, but I had fun. With you."
"Me too." Blaine set the helmet aside and stepped closer to Kurt. "I always do. I can't help but think it's supposed to be that way, Kurt. Just you and I."
Kurt had been grinning, but the smile faded and something like trepidation flashed in his eyes. "Blaine…" He frowned at his boots.
It hurt, pain lancing through his heart and sinking into his stomach. Kurt still wasn't sure of him. Maybe he didn't feel the same for him.
Kurt looked up and gently cupped his chin, bringing it up to meet his lips softly. At first Blaine wanted to be petulant and not kiss him back, but he couldn't resist Kurt when he was kissing him so sweetly. He gave in, sinking into the kiss and allowing Kurt to slip his tongue into his mouth. He sucked on Kurt's tongue a little, teasingly and enjoyed the shivers shooting through him at the action. Kurt made a little noise of approval and used his hands to grip Blaine's shoulders and pull him even closer. Blaine went, he couldn't help himself and he twisted his fingers into the lapels of Kurt's jacket. It must of been a testament to how much he was enjoying the kiss that Kurt didn't even seem to register the fact that Blaine was wrinkling the fabric, and that made Blaine smile.
Kurt pulled back, smiling at Blaine's amusement. "What?"
Blaine shook his head. "Nothing. I guess I should get going."
"Or you could come in for a bit," Kurt's eyes seemed to glow in the dark and Blaine wanted to toss himself into the blue flames. But he needed a break.
"I need to get home. Next time, I promise."
Kurt seemed a bit disappointed, but Blaine must have held his pain back well, because he accepted it without too much questioning. "Okay. I'll see you later." He pressed one more lingering kiss to Blaine's lips. "Thank you for tonight."
"I'll call you." He jumped on his bike quickly and raced away. He made the mistake of licking his lips and tasted Kurt there.
"Fuck." He sped up and tried to fight his smile. He was getting in too deep with someone who couldn't make up his mind.
Sunday morning
Blaine had no idea why everyone was against him getting to sleep in. What harm would a little lazy morning do?
It started with Sam LOUDLY singing in the shower way too goddam early, but luckily Blaine was able to drift back off.
Then Tina and Mike, who had apparently slept over, were clanging around in the kitchen probably making sickening heart shaped pancakes and giving each other bunny kisses every five fucking seconds. He growled and stuffed his head under his pillow, hoping to drown them out.
That is until his phone started to ring. He should have just let it go to voicemail, but a small part (okay a big part) of him hoped it would be Kurt. But of course, it wasn't. He wasn't that lucky.
"Heya Blainey! Good morning!"
Blaine just made a disgruntled noise back into the phone.
"It's a beautiful day! Let's do something! Hey, let's go golfing!"
Cracking open an eye, Blaine peeked at the disgustingly gorgeous day outside. "You golf?"
"Eh. Needed a new hobby. Now come on! Get that bubble butt up and let's go four!"
Blaine scrubbed at his face and exhaled through his nose.
"Whoa, that was a big sigh! Sounds like the, Cooper's got a fantastic idea sigh! Anyway, get up out of bed and come hang with me!"
"I'm not in bed," Blaine lied as he closed his eyes and snuggled under his covers.
"Yes you are!" The door burst open and Cooper trotted in carrying a plate and still speaking into his phone. "You're missing heart shaped pancakes!"
Blaine hung up and immediately covered up his head with his comforter. "Whyyyy?"
Blaine grunted when Cooper threw himself on the bed and halfway onto him. "Well, I was making sure you didn't have a boy in here, but by the distinct lack of pale skin, I'd say there was no pulling done last night."
"Get out."
"Now Blainey, I think you should tell me how it went!"
Resigned to the fact that there was probably no more sleeping being done today, Blaine threw the covers to his bare waist and glared at the ceiling. "I think you should get the hell out. Oh, and thank you for getting me tickets to a depressing as fuck play to take Kurt too. That definitely helped."
"It had good reviews!"
"His brother died less than a year ago, Coop. Guess what happens to the brother in the play?"
Cooper paled and sucked in his lips. "Oops."
"Yeah, Cooper. Real big oops. I looked like a giant asshole."
The elder shrugged. "You could charm your way out of that. What else happened?"
Blaine only grunted and continued training his murderous looks on the ceiling.
Cooper lifted the edge of his comforter with a finger. "You all the way naked under there? Whew, glad you are wearing underwear. I guess it's nothing I haven't ever seen. I did used to bathe you—"
"Please go away."
Before he could reach over and throttle Cooper, the door slapped open again and Sam came ambling in and flicked an imaginary hat. "Well, what do we have here? A cuddle session?" he drawled in his best John Wayne impression.
"Don't—" was all Blaine got out before Sam leaped and flopped onto Blaine's bed.
"He's wearing underwear," Cooper informed the blond as he sucked sticky syrup from his fingers.
"Thank god."
"This bed," Blaine ground out, "is big enough for me and a sexual partner. Get. Off."
Sam just snuggled into Blaine's other side while Cooper played in Blaine's curls, causing him to slap his hand away.
"Surely it's big enough for two more?"
Tina and Mike had huge grins on their faces as they sidled in. Blaine gave up at that point, throwing an arm across his eyes and the couple wormed their way onto the bed.
"I guess if it didn't break when I fucked that guy from the gym all night, it can handle you assholes." He smirked at the varied reactions, some impressed (Mike) while others disgusted (Cooper.)
Cooper poked his nipple which earned him a pinch this time. "Ow! Okay. So? You took Kurt out again. How did it go minus the bump? Thoughts? Feelings? Did you seal the deal or are we back to square one?"
"We are not in this together," Blaine grumbled. "And the bump was your fucking fault."
"What did he do?" Tina asked.
"Sent me and Kurt to the saddest play ever. Oh, and the brother dies. Kurt's brother? Died less than a year ago. That was a fun little coincidence for him."
Tina smacked Cooper's leg. "Really?"
Mike shook his head disapprovingly.
"Wow," Sam gasped.
"He deflecting!" Cooper pointed hard at Blaine. "Tell us now!"
The others immediately looked back to him.
"Tell us, Blainey!" Tina begged from his legs where Mike also was curled. "Honestly, the play is kind of on you. You should know not to trust something like that to Cooper."
"Hey!"
Sam pouted and Mike propped up on his elbow so he could look Blaine in the eye.
"We could probably help you."
Blaine rolled his eyes and huffed before sitting up. It required shoving Cooper and Sam away from him which he did without remorse. "Fine. This isn't healthy, by the way. You are all way too involved with my love life." He twisted his mouth away from a smile when they cheered. Obnoxious creeps. "The date was amazing. Even more amazing than the first one which was hard to top. God, he's just so… I think I'm falling for him."
Tina and Mike hugged and cooed as Sam smiled happily and Cooper swiped away tears. The dope could cry at a moments notice.
Blaine's dazed smile slipped into a morose one. "I brought up us being together, but he's still not ready. I'm trying not to get bummed about it, but the more I feel, the harder it is to accept. Maybe I should just bow out. I doubt he will pick me anyway…"
Everyone's strong disapproval of that made him scowl.
"You are amazing and he is probably just scared," Tina said.
The others nodded in agreement.
"Maybe he is just playing hard to get?" Sam ventured but Cooper shook his head.
"Is he convinced you have changed your mind about the kid?"
It was comical how everyone's heads swiveled from Cooper back to Blaine.
He huffed. "I'm trying. I'm just so damn awkward. Trust me, I'm using all my powers of persuasion." He gestured down his body and got eye rolls in return.
"I know!" Mike said, his eyes lighting up. "Invite him to my birthday party! Then we can all talk you up! Invite the little kid too!"
Blaine scraped at his stubble. That was actually not a terrible idea. "Okay. If you're sure you don't mind?"
"Of course not! It will be really chill and we can help you."
Tina smacked a kiss to his cheek. "You're so smart, baby."
"It's settled!" Cooper rubbed his hands together. "You bring them and we will make you look so good!"
"You will be calm." Blaine said, poking Coopers chest in emphasis. "You will not make him uncomfortable."
Cooper gasped, affronted. "I am the picture of calm!"
"You are a hurricane. A tornado. A disaster."
Cooper howled at his impugned honor and jumped on Blaine who screamed at him. Sam joined in, happy to wrestle at any moment. Tina and Mike decided that they wanted no part of this particular thing and went back to clean up their mess in the kitchen.
Monday
The keys of Kurt's laptop clacked away as the designer tried to finish up his emails. He kept losing focus, too many things clogging up his mind.
This was why he decided to work from home today. He was not in the mood to argue with Brittany about how to file things or remember what Blaine looked like writhing naked across his desk. He also didn't want to fend off Adam's advances. Not that Adam would probably want to talk to him.
Kurt pulled off his glasses and rubbed his eyes tiredly. Everything was quiet in his kitchen where he had his work spread out at his bar, the clock on the wall the only sound. They had gone on a date the previous day. Adam insisted once he discovered Kurt had gone out with Blaine. He wasn't going to tell him, but he had to explain when Marley mentioned being there two nights in a row. Adam was pissed, he could tell. He felt a little guilty, but he was kind of getting bored of the two jealous men tugging him back and forth like a rag doll. They went to eat and for a walk and then Adam surprised Kurt with a lovely pearl brooch. He claimed he couldn't accept it, to which Adam said he could accept a gift from his boyfriend. That turned into Kurt having to gently remind him they weren't boyfriends yet to which Adam reminded Kurt he wanted to be. The silence was loud after that. Adam seemed to calm all of the sudden, which had Kurt suspicious. He went with it though, allowing Adam to lead him back to his apartment where they had parked Kurt's car. Kurt accepted a goodnight kiss, but Adam had deepened it, clearly wanting more. He insisted Kurt come up with him, but when he hesitated, Adam lost his cool and asked him why he would screw Blaine but not him. Kurt got defensive and said he needed to go home to relive his sitter, to which Adam told him to leave then. He hadn't responded to any texts Kurt sent.
Kurt massaged his temples. Maybe it was for the best. Maybe he and Adam weren't meant to be. On paper, they made sense. But in practice he was finding the relationship a challenge. But relationships weren't meant to be easy. Was he giving Adam a fair chance? And then there was Blaine. He leaned back in his chair. He was just so… so… sexy and sweet and charming and fun… Their date the other night had been magical and he wasn't sure he wanted it to end. Then the dance at the end, the golden lights shining in Blaine's eyes… Kurt groaned. Why was this so fucking hard?
A FaceTime call came through Kurt's phone and he smiled seeing it was his father. He could really use some advice.
"Hey Dad!"
"Hey, Kurt. Where's the munchkin?"
His own father was trying to see around him for the child.
Kurt folded his arms. "Napping. Isn't your own son enough for you?"
Burt smiled at his son's jealousy. "I'm sorry. How are you, son?"
Shoulders dropping, Kurt sighed and flopped back. "Just terrible! I need advice."
"I'm all ears," Burt replied, sitting back in his own seat to listen.
Kurt chewed his lip. "I'm having relationship issues…"
Burt waited, but when Kurt still didn't speak, he gestured for him to continue. "I'm going to need a bit more to go on."
"Okay, now hear me out before you judge me."
"That's just what every parent wants to hear."
"Dad."
"Sorry. I'm reserving judgement."
Kurt sucked in a deep breath before launching into his story, editing out a few of the more… sexual parts he didn't really think his dad would like to know. He was just finishing when his dad interjected.
"Have you had sex with either of them?" Burt asked bluntly. Apparently he did want to know…
Kurt gasped. "Dad!"
Burt held up his hands. "Hey, you wanted advice. I need to know all the details. I mean, you don't have to elaborate."
"I… I slept with Blaine. Not Adam."
"Why?"
Kurt raised an eyebrow.
Burt fixed him with a dry smile. "I know why. Gay or straight, pretty sure it's the same reason."
Kurt raised both eyebrows in agreement.
Burt rubbed at his bald head, obviously uncomfortable at this part of the conversation. Kurt guessed it didn't matter what age you were, it never got easier to discuss sex with your child. That brought about a whole new bout of anxiety as he realized he would have to explain things to sweet, precious Kit one day. Ugh, he would have to worry about that some other time. "I mean, why do you think you felt good about doing something like that with one and not the other?"
Kurt bowed his head, fingers digging into his hair. "I don't know! Hence the needing advice."
"Look, I don't know either of these guys, but Blaine kind of sounds like a handful and the other guy sounds like… The way you describe him he's like…"
"A throw pillow?" Kurt muttered.
"Yeah. Anyway, I can't decide this for you, but I know you will go with your gut and make the right choice for you."
"But that's just it! It's not about me! It's me and Kit! What if I ruin his life? I keep rereading Finn's letter and trying to think what he would say, but I just don't know." He was a few moments away from a full blown panic attack. This was what kept him restless and unsure.
His father must have seen how upset he was because his face softened and gave his son a reassuring smile. "Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but do you think you might be using Kit because you have a hard choice to make?"
Kurt shook his head, but then blinked at his father. "Do you think I'm doing that?" He looked down at his papers in front of him.
"I'm just trying to help you out here." Burt shifted closer to his screen, gray-green eyes clouding with sadness. "Carole read her letter." Kurt jerked his eyes back up. "I won't tell you everything, because some of it is personal. But there was a bit in there explaining why he picked you. He wanted her to understand. He said, 'Kurt's the right choice. He knows what he's doing and he loves Kit.' He had confidence in you and I know it wasn't misplaced.
"Kurt, I have been in your shoes. I know how every choice you make seems wrong and you don't want to screw your kid up, but let me tell you what I learned: not every path is right and wrong, sometimes it's just different. Kid, you see what you want and you go for it. Whoever is beside you needs to be just as driven as you. And as for Kit, don't just look at what you think will be the best for him. Don't you think what's best for Kit is seeing you in a loving, happy relationship? Family looks a little different to everyone. I mean, look at ours."
Kurt swiped away a tear, the lump in his throat aching. He nodded, causing Burt to smile at him.
"Wouldn't it be easier to date someone else? I'm sure there are other men interested in you."
Kurt rolled his eyes and sniffed. "Now you sound like Mercedes."
Burt laughed. "She always did have a good head on her shoulders."
They were interrupted by a little cry from the monitor. Kurt collected himself and stood. "Kit's awake. He must have sensed your presence."
"He's a genius," Burt declared proudly.
Kurt shook his head fondly. "Hang on and I'll go get him. And dad?"
"Hm?"
"Thanks. This helped."
Burt smiled. "I hope so.
*the play they see is based on the Ghibli movie Grave of Fireflies which is based on a true story. Don't watch it unless you want to bawl your eyes out. Seriously. She isn't like her sisters.
Songs used/mentioned:
Part of Me -Katy Perry (you know little Blaine sang this a lot :'( I hate us too)
Call Me By Your Name - Lil Nas X
Tear It Up - Queen
Teenage Dream - Katy Perry
Walk The Line - Johnny Cash (Halsey does a nice cover)
Halo - Lewis Watson
Like I'm going to Lose You - Megan Trainor but like a slowed down version on the violin. (Think Elizabeth Pak)