Hi, so here is another chapter and I hope you enjoy. This one does deal with the death of a parent and to be honest takes a more in-depth look at the relationship between Lily and Sirius than it does anyone else. I really did enjoy writing this dynamic so I hope that you enjoy this as much as I did.
Disclaimer-Nothing is mine.
Please Read and Review and let me know what you think.
And again TRIGGER WARNINGS for the death of a parent and some neglectful parenting on Lily's mother's part.
The Beginning Of The End
Chapter 9-Lily Of The Valley
Lily gets the shock of her life, Sirius reflects. And someone dies. Trigger Warnings for this chapter and Trigger Warnings for the death of a parent.
Lily had been asleep.
Not a deep sleep mind you but asleep and that was the best that she could do.
She had never slept well at home. Not since her father had died. There hadn't been much point. Her mother had turned her deep love of her youngest daughter into a disinterest mixed with affection (somewhere deep down Lily had hoped that there was love mixed in) and Petunia…well…the less said about her sister the better. Her sister who had become engaged to a man who had made it very clear that what Lily did was an abomination and who had made it very clear that he didn't want Lily in the wedding (though he had begrudgingly allowed her to attend) and had made it very clear that he didn't want her around any of his children.
At this point, after the Christmas day meeting with Vernon Dursley Lily had felt tempted to tell them that she wouldn't go to the wedding full stop but she suspected that, that would be the end of her relationship with her sister.
What frightened her was how little she cared.
She didn't care about her relationship with Petunia. When the world that had welcomed her with open arms was burning a conversation about there wasn't enough room for the bride's sister to be apart of the wedding party seemed rather stupid.
She had tried once to tell Petunia that things were dangerous. She had told her about Lord Voldemort but her sister had listened with absent minded disgust. She had understood that somethings in the news were down to what she called 'Lily's lot' but she didn't seem to grasp that it was going to get a lot worse before it got better.
If it got better which looking at the Prophet one morning Lily was not sure it would.
On Christmas morning the Death Eaters had orchestrated an attack on the muggle town of Rippon in York. The Muggles were calling it a gas leak with epic proportions but it was an attack of massive co-ordination leaving seventeen people dead and eight more in hospital with life threatening injuries. They had ripped through the Yorkshire Dales and had killed and maimed and set fire to everything and anyone they could find men, woman and children alike. Lily had watched the BBC talk about the attacks, had watched the Prime Minister appear afterwards with a gaunt, hollowed out look on his face and had watched the Prince and the Princess of Wales put aside their differences to come out and visit.
(On a sperate note if Lily ever got to be that fashionable she would die happy—seriously how did the woman get her make up to be that perfect when she struggled to put her eyeliner on in the morning was beyond her)
The only good thing was that now the Ministry of Magic seemed to be taking the threat seriously. They had put Barty Crouch in charge of the auror's and he had promised in a stirring speech on the wizarding wireless to hunt down the Death Eaters with a ruthlessness that was quite frankly rather unnerving. They had also pulled back in someone called Alastair Moody who was known as 'Mad-Eye'. What that meant she didn't know but it was clear that the war had started and the dark clouds that had been gathering over the autumn term were getting darker and darker.
She had gone to bed on Boxing Day feeling rather melancholy. Christmas had been a small affair. Her mother had spent most of her time at her father's graveside and Petunia had been out with Vernon's family and so she had spent the day on her own.
She had cracked open a bottle of white wine that had once belonged to her mother and had sat on the sofa eating turkey sandwiches for most of the day and thinking to herself that it might have been easier if she'd have stayed at Hogwarts for the holidays or perhaps even just gone to Marlene's like the girl had offered. God knows anything had to be better than this.
She had gone to bed to an empty house and had drifted into an uneasy sleep when she had been awakened by banging on her front door.
Actual banging.
She had grabbed her wand and staggered downstairs. Granted she wasn't seventeen yet but she would be damned if anyone threw her out of Hogwarts for defending herself.
She pattered downstairs in her old t-shirt which came to just the top of her thighs and her fuzzy socks, pointed her wand at the door and said in a tone that she knew made even the hardened Slytherin cower in fear (well…fifth year and below)
"Who is it?"
"Evans's it's me. Sirius"
She nearly dropped her wand in shock and it was that, that made her open the door.
And there he was. Sirius Black. Dark hair tied in some sort of very small pony tail and nail varnish chipped and eyes framed by dark and sad shadows.
"What the fuck are you doing on my doorstep at one in the morning" she asked. She was too tired, too surprised and too irritated to be polite.
Sirius raised one eyebrow at her response and then looked her up and down. Lily felt the urge to hit him regardless of how sad he looked.
"Wow Evans, no wonder they stop us boys from going into the girls dorms"
Lily gritted her teeth and somehow resisted the urge to hit him.
"What the fuck do you want?"
"It's James"
Her wand fell out of her hand. It clattered on the cheap linoleum and she forced herself to bend and pick it up. Sirius watched her with eyes that spoke of a sadness but as he took in her expression they widened a little.
"Oh no not that…nah he's fine…well…he's…it's his Mum. Lily look…I'm freezing my bollocks off can I come in and I'll explain"
She looked at him dimly for a second because it was the fact that he had used her first name for the first time in his life that had shocked her above all else.
"Sure" she said and she opened the door a little wider. She noticed that Sirius had thrown a cloak over his pyjama's and his boots were unlaced.
"Drink?"
"Nah…unless you got firewhiskey"
"I've got white wine"
"I have no idea what that is"
"Then no"
She flicked the heater on and Sirius sat down next to it shivering.
"Sorry about this Lil but…but this important"
"Figured as much" she said sitting down opposite him.
"It's James mum…how…how much do you know about his family?"
Lily blinked.
"I know his Dad is dead" she said carefully. "I know that it was dragon pox and both his parents got it but…" and then it hit her.
"Oh God Sirius…"
"Yeah" Sirius said grimly. "It's…she's dying Lil. I think we all knew it, James included and she was frail before we left in September but its…it's soon. Tonight probably"
Lily closed her eyes for a second and then opened them again.
Dragonpox she knew from studies about it was the wizarding equivalent to cancer. It sometimes ebbed and flowed but the reality was in this day and age it killed you one way or the other. And now James was facing being an orphan at the age of seventeen.
"Wine?" she said flatly.
"Err…no I've got to stay sober. But if you want go ahead"
She nodded and reached for the last of the bottle. Fuck principals.
"So…you're here why"
Sirius eyed her for a second and then when he spoke it was as if he was choosing each word carefully.
"James needs you"
Lily snorted into her wine. "Why did he ask for me?" she asked with a wry smile. She had been expecting an eye roll or some cocky response from Sirius. What she had not been expecting was those dark eyes to track her every move with a maturity she had never seen from him before.
"He…he wants me there?"
"His mother does"
Lily spat a mouthful of wine onto the floor. Sirius shot her something that might once have resembled his cheeky grin. As it was at this point it was too sad and she remembered with a pang that Mrs Potter had taken him in and had stuck by him even when James and Sirius had fallen out all those months ago last year.
"I'm sorry?"
"His mother wants to meet you. Or so James says"
"So James says?"
She had to repeat herself. She didn't know what else to say to that. Seriously what is she supposed to say to that?
"He…she wants to meet you, she's…she's sorry she can't. She's heard James wax poetic about you for so long that she wants to see you and believe me if James wasn't terrified of leaving her he'd be here asking you and…and so I'm here"
He finished it lamely but Lily could see the sadness bleeding out of him and she wanted to hug him. While she and Sirius had never been close she did like him. And besides, with enemies all around the one thing she wanted was a friend and she thought that whatever she and Sirius were friends was a safe word that she could use.
Actually she was glad to use.
"I don't…James and I…Sirius please tell me she doesn't think that were together…because I agreed on a date not a fucking marriage"
Sirius let out his bark like laughter.
"Oh honey" he said warmly. "She knows that. You remember after the abortion that was that day at the lake with…Sniv…Snape?"
Lily shot him a long look over her wine glass.
"Well" Sirius said ploughing on regardless.
"She was the one who suggested that he…tone it down a bit. Actually she smacked him on the back of the head and told him that, that was no way to treat a woman and…and he stopped I guess. And…and Lil he's my best mate and he needs you and he wants you here and she wants you here and she's like…nah fuck it she is my Mum. Please…I wouldn't ask if I wasn't sure it wasn't going to be tonight.
Lily watched him.
"Shit..."
"Ain't that the truth sister"
"I don't…what am I supposed to say? I don't want to be the one who upsets her. This thing with James…it's…new"
She had no idea why she was saying this to Sirius Black of all people. If she had to tell any of the Marauders about her feelings for James she'd pick Remus in a heartbeat. Common fucking sense and all that.
"I know" Sirius said with an eye roll. "Lily I like you but seriously I've been a part of this since the beginning. I know. You don't have to be anything but yourself. Trust me. If things between you and James don't work out…well…she'll be dead by then so…" he trailed off and then scrubbed hand over his face and it was that more than anything else that spurred her into action.
"Let me get dressed"
Sirius's face crumpled at that and despite Lily's misgivings, the fact that she was half naked and the fact that it was one in the morning and none of her family would care that she was missing come morning she stood up and hugged him. Sirius his face to her stomach wrapped his arms around her waist. She held him there for a second feeling like he needed it, to get out all his emotions. She let him do that and didn't comment on the shaking of his shoulders or the fact that her jumper was wet.
Finally, Sirius pulled back and he wiped his face with his hand.
"Sorry" he said finally. Lily shook her head. There were several things that Sirius could say sorry to her for. This was not one of them.
"I'm gonna go…get dressed" she said finally. "I'll be back in a moment."
Sirius nodded and she left him sitting by her electric heater.
She dressed in jeans and a jumper that was semi decent. She left a scribbled note for her mother telling her that she had gone to spend some time with some friends (not that she suspected her mother would be bothered—certainly her sister wouldn't) and then she threw some stuff in a bag. She wasn't sure if there was an invitation to stay but Lily liked to be prepared for anything.
Sirius took her arm when she flicked off the heater and then they turned and she was gone from her house to outside a little low down cottage in a quite village.
"Godric's Hollow?" she said with an eyebrow.
"Yeah" Sirius said as the snow came down in thick clumps around them.
"Figures"
"What does?"
"That James would live in the home of Godric Gryffindor."
Sirius cracked a smile and then opened the door.
Lily dithered for a second and then she crossed the threshold.
James came out to meet them.
"Sorry" he said hoping from one foot to the other. "I just…it seemed like such an easy thing to do"
"Yeah" she said quietly watching him. "I brought some stuff…so I can stay for a while if you want"
"Your mother won't mind?"
Lily snorted. "Don't even start"
He eyed her for a second, she noticed his eyes were very red.
"Come on" he said finally. "I just…she wants to see you"
"Does she know I'm even here?"
"Yes…kinda…I told her that you were coming but the pain is very bad so I don't know how much of it she understands. Sirius she wants to see you too. This will be over before sunrise"
And with that he turned on his heel. Lily caught Sirius's eye and at his nod she followed James into the room him just behind her.
"Mum" James said to the woman on the bed. Lily would put her at older than her mother but she was frail now and emancipated. The dragon pox had ravaged the one beautiful woman on the bed and she felt that she was blinking back tears just looking at her. Eyes the same shade as her son's but hazy with pain focused on her son and then on Lily.
"Lily's here Mum" James said softly sitting at the bed.
"Look…now you've met Lily"
"Li-ly" the woman said softly her voice straining against the pain and Lily managed a small smile sitting on the edge of the bed her eyes overbright with tears. Sirius came and sat on the floor by the door watching. The woman looked from Lily to Sirius to James and then back again smiling.
"Hello Mrs Potter" Lily said softly.
"Li-ly"
She said it again her voice crackling and Lily smiled. James looked away for a second his hand in his mother's his chin wobbling furiously but when he turned back to look at her she noticed that his emotions were under control.
Already he was a man in this, this the second parent he was burying in two years.
James was right, his mother didn't last to see the sunrise. At three she asked Sirius to open the window and he did letting in a blast of cold air and a flurry of snowflakes into the room and Lily who had been watching James who had been watching his mother, holding her hand found herself watching the woman for a second. For one moment the tired hazel eyes found the green and the woman smiled once as if to acknowledge Lily as a whole and then flickered to her son. For one moment they locked and then hers went dim and then dark and Euphemia Potter's hand felt limply out of her son's and her chest rose no more and it was over.
She had been right Lily thought to herself. It had been before sunrise. And now it was over.
For her maybe.
But not for the ones left behind.
It was never over for the ones left behind.
And there you go, I hope you enjoyed that chapter and I will do my best to bring you the next one sooner rather than later.
Next Chapter-James learns how to relive his life in the aftermath of his mother's death and he, Sirius and Lily go back to Hogwarts for the start of a term where everything will change.