Chapter 11:

Dimitri

I left Mikhail and Sonya upstairs. She had quieted down a little. She was still sniffing and Mikhail was still rubbing her back and softly saying it would be okay, but she wasn't hysterical anymore.

The image of the two lovers clinging to each other was branded in me. How differently would things have been for me if I had been able to be in Rose's arms after my restoration? I realized that if I could do it again, I wouldn't have hesitated and pulled her into my chest and hugged her until they would have hauled me away. Which was probably pretty soon afterwards, seeing as I had been a nasty Strigoi in the midst of battle.

I went downstairs. Robert was lying on the couch. He wasn't sleeping exactly, but awake was also a strong word for his condition. Whatever it was, he was exhausted. Viktor didn't look any better. He was sitting on a chair next to Robert never taking his eyes off of Rose, except when I came down. His eyes briefly met mine before refocusing on Rose.

Rose had her eyes on Viktor. She didn't turn around when I came down the stairs. She knew it was me. I don't think either of them has said anything in a while.

I noticed one person was missing. "Where is Mia?"

Without turning around and keeping her eyes firmly on Viktor she replied. "I sent her out for some supplies. Food and stuff."

Not exactly a bad idea. We would need food soon and it kept Mia safe.

I moved towards Rose. I sat in the chair next to Rose. Together we were a front of Guardians against these seemingly weak Moroi. But I would never underestimate either of them. They were dangerous and at least one of them should be behind bars.

"Not that this wasn't helpful, Viktor, but you do know we will take you back to Tarasov right?" I broke the silence. That is where he belonged. After his escape guardians hadn't been able to find him, but he must know that we had means of communicating with Court and that there would be guardians here in a blink of an eye. So I wondered why Viktor had exposed himself like this and why he didn't seem to worry.

Viktor's cruel smile did nothing to alleviate my worry.

"You might want to hold off on that call Guardian Belikov. If I go back, I will have to tell them exactly how I got out of Tarasov in the first place."

Rose cringed a bit and looked guiltily my way. It took me a moment too long to register his words as he looked towards Rose. It shouldn't have been a shock, not with Rose.

'I broke my own record this time.'

That is what Rose had said to me when she explained the lengths she had gone through to get me restored. And breaking into a maximum security prison to help her arch nemesis escape truly is one hell of a Rose plan. I groaned as I realized she didn't do it alone. Lissa was in on this too.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. If we put Viktor back in prison he would tell people who had freed them. They might not believe him. It would certainly be hard for people to believe Lissa had helped Viktor escape, but their alibi wasn't watertight. It couldn't be, they weren't actually in Vegas the night of the escape.

I looked over to Rose, unable to keep looking at Viktor who was very pleased with himself. But I wouldn't let him do this to Rose. He wouldn't hurt her again or Lissa. I stepped closer, towering over him, my guardian mask was replaced with my scowl. I knew I looked threatening, but Viktor seemed unperturbed.

"Ah, yes, the violent option. You and Rose are truly made for each other."

Rose pulled me back a bit and away from Viktor. I kept my eyes on the man a moment longer before I broke contact and looked towards Rose- who was very calm and had a smile on her face.

"You are right, Viktor. I got myself in a bit of a jam there. Now what is a girl to do." She faked a dramatic hand on her head.

I wasn't looking forward to experiencing another crazy Rose plan, but I was glad she wasn't worried. At least she had a plan.

She pulled her phone out of her pocket. I wanted to stop her from calling Hans. If Rose thought her alibi would hold, she would be mistaken. But when the phone was answered it wasn't Hans's voice on the other end. It was, however, a male voice.

"Hey Pavel, it's Rose, can you put the old man on, please?"

Old man? Pavel? I only knew one Pavel and he was guardian to-.

"-Mazur here." I heard over the phone. I paled and I noticed so did Viktor although he was trying to hide it pretty well.

"Hey Abe, I need a teensy tinsy little favor."

What? No, Rose, don't make a deal with Abe Mazur. I remember they had met in Russia, but I didn't think they were still in contact or that she had his number memorized. This wasn't good. If Abe figured out Rose helped Viktor escape he would have leverage over her. It wasn't worth that. By the looks of Viktor he would be dead soon. I could watch him until then. She didn't need to throw away her life.

I tried to signal for Rose to hang up, but she just waved me off.

"I have Viktor Dashkov here." I heard some mumbling over the phone but couldn't make out what Abe said. "yes, that Viktor Dashkov. I want him back in jail but you know-"

"- you broke him out of jail and now he is blackmailing you?" Abe supplemented. That part was loud and clear.

"Pretty much."

"And you called me first? I am touched."

"Yeah, well, Viktor always accuses me of being too violent, so I thought I would try it a different way. You must have dealt with these kinds of situations, so I figured I would ask you for advice."

He laughed. "Usually I do the blackmailing." This made Rose smile too. I had no idea what was happening here.

"Alibi?" Abe asked.

"Good, but not water tight.. obviously"

"Money trail?"

"Private jet from Alaska to Vegas under Adrian's name, and a bill from the witching hour backdated." Rose paused a moment before adding. " and a rental car in Alaska, fake name, but real money."

You could practically hear his brain working a way around her predicament.

"Put Viktor on the phone." Abe said.

Rose hesitated for a moment but then handed the phone to Viktor. He took it, but I noticed his hands were shaking a little. It was good to know even Viktor feared someone. I imagine Viktor and Abe had a lot in common, brains over brawns and information is power. But I think Viktor was out of his league here.

We couldn't hear what Abe was saying but I could see Viktor getting paler by the second.

After a few minutes Viktor handed the phone back wordlessly. Rose put it to her ear again.

"He will gladly go back to Tarasov, Viktor and I have decided that was the best course of action for everyone."

I felt the chills down my spine, but Rose just rolled her eyes. "I didn't need you to take care of this, I just wanted some advice. I get myself into trouble, but I also get myself out of it."

"But isn't it nice, that at least this time you didn't have too?"

Rose smiled a little. It was…affectionate. What the hell was going on here.

"Oh and old man, I don't think I have to remind you to keep this between us. If Mom found out-"

"-I like all my bits intact, thank you very much. Now good luck, and be careful."

Rose said her goodbyes and hung up her phone. I just stared at her. Pieces were starting to come together in my head and I didn't like where they were leading me.

She turned to Viktor. "You have a day to recover, say your goodbyes and know that you tried to help your people in your final months -weeks- whatever."

Viktor slumped in his chair, obviously defeated. I pulled Rose away from him and demanded an explanation from her.

"What the hell was that?" I asked, my voice increasing an octave in panic.

"What?" She really had no idea what she was doing wrong.

"Rose, Abe is dangerous. Making a deal with him is-"

"But I didn't make a deal with him. I told him my problem and he had to pull the protective card and fix it. But he is right, it is kind of nice having someone bail me out of trouble." She chuckled, but I didn't find it funny at all.

I asked the question I was dreading the answer to. "Why is Abe Mazur protective of you?"

She shrugged. "Apparently he is my father and now that I am old enough to take care of myself, he wants to bond. He has eighteen years to make up for. So I think he figured keeping me out of jail is a start."

There were so many things wrong with that sentence I didn't even know where to begin. Abe being Rose's father, although it made sense for a lot of reasons. That was a bomb I wasn't really ready to proces yet, because I was still on the fact that Rose had broken Viktor Dashkov out of jail, maximum security no less, for me.

The front door opened and Mia stepped in with a bag of groceries. It saved me from diving too much into how much that meant to me.

This was the first time Robert looked up from his spot on the couch. Mia put the groceries down on the kitchen counter and Robert started to look through the bags, trying to find something. Mia moved towards us. I couldn't blame her. Viktor was the real threat here, but Robert was creepy in his own way. Viktor you could predict. Robert was a loose canon.

"I am going to go upstairs, ask if Mikhail and Sonya want anything." I said.

"And I am going to see if there is a local delivery for feeders. We have four Moroi here and at least three of them need blood soon." Rose said.

I instructed Mia to stay on the opposite side of the room and keep a close eye on the brothers while Rose made the call, although I knew Rose would never let them leave her line of sight. Then I walked up the stairs.

Mikhail and Sonya were now sitting against the headboard of her bed. She was leaning into him and they were talking. The tears had dried on her face, but she was still shaking a little.

When she saw me she strengthened a little bit and tried to dry a few tears.

I held up my hand, indicating she didn't have to be brave around me. "Please don't. You don't have to get up on my account."

She leaned back into Mikhail, who was still holding her protectively. I don't think he will let her go anytime soon. He needed her touch as much as she needed his, to know she was still there, still real.

Another thing I took from Rose. Not only couldn't she touch me, I didn't even want to see her.

I sat down in the chair opposite their bed. "Mia got some food and Rose is getting some feeders. I can get something for you if you want. you don't have to come down."

Sonya smiled. It was warm, if not a bit forced. Nothing like the Strigoi smirk she had a mere hour ago. The difference was night and day. It was almost like I could see her soul back into her body. Is this what other people saw when they looked at me? Were he and I so different as Sonya had been from her Strigoi self?

When I looked into the mirror I still saw him. I had a better complexion and the red around my irises was gone, but I only saw the superficial changes. But looking at Sonya meant I saw the whole transformation. It was eye-opening.

"Thank you, Dimitri. I'll take a look in a while." Mikhail said, but I doubted he would leave Sonya - even just going downstairs.

"Mikhail tells me that you were restored too?" Sonya said.

I nodded. I looked down at my hands. I really didn't know what else to say. Restored was such a loaded word. I didn't feel restored. I was dhampir again, but the Dimitri I had been before I was turned was not the Dimitri I was now. But I don't think Sonya needed to hear that right now.

"It is a little different seeing it happen to somebody else. I thought it was intense just for me."

"Yes, how long ago was it?"

"a couple of weeks." I responded. It felt so long ago and so recently at the same time. I had been restored a little over two weeks ago and in those two weeks I felt like I had lived a lifetime.

"So recently. And you are okay now? I mean, I feel…"

I knew exactly how she felt. The guilt, it was overwhelming. I briefly looked at Mikhail and I saw he was imploring me to be positive. If I told her the truth of how it had been for me, she would definitely be discouraged.

So I lied.

"I am okay now. It isn't easy. I sometimes catch myself doing something that reminds me of my time as Strigoi and for a moment I am pulled back into that darkness. But a little less everyday. I hurt a lot of people, killed even more, but it is important to know that that was the monster and not me. It helps that there are people around me that help remind me of who I am."

How I wished I believed my own words.

But Sonya breathed a little easier and that was all that mattered. I had gone through hell after my restoration, some due to being locked in a cell and most of it was my own doing. I would make sure that Sonya wouldn't make the same mistakes.

She looked at Mikhail and squeezed his hand. "Could you get me some water and maybe something light to eat?" Mikhail looked down at his lost-lover and frowned, but when she pulled some puppy-dog eyes he caved and slowly and reluctantly let go of her. Once he was out of earshot, Sonya turned to me.

"I appreciate you lying to me." I chuckled. I guess I can't fool a spirit user.

"Sorry. I don't think telling you I went through hell is very productive. And I am doing better. Maybe not okay yet, but for the first time in a long time, I have faith that I will get there… eventually."

She laughed. "That is better."

"You have Mikhail. And that will help a lot. Just let him help, okay?"

She cocked her head to the side a bit. "You didn't have somebody to comfort you?"

I did, I just wouldn't let her. Also, I doubt they would have let her in my cell. "I was restored during a full-on guardian-Strigoi battle. For the first week I was locked in a cell."

I leaned back into the chair. If I was being honest I might as well be honest about everything. "And the person I loved the most, I also hurt the most as a Strigoi. So I pushed her away, overwhelmed with the guilt of what I did to her."

Sonya got out of her bed and walked over to me, she sat on the edge of the bed and placed her hand on mine. "And now?"

I had no idea how to answer that question. Now what? I was starting to feel other things than guilt. Anger mostly, but also worry for Rose and jealousy of Adrian and relief when she said she had broken up. I still wanted her, I still…

"It is too late. The things I have done as a Strigoi, she might have forgiven, but I hurt her again after I was restored. I have no excuse for that."

She snorted. "Other than being traumatized that is."

Well, yeah there was that.

Mikhail came back with some snacks and some drinks. Sonya took a bottle of flavored water and she had no trouble with the liquid. I remember the first time I had drank anything other than blood again. Even the water had tasted amazing. Food however…

Mikhail gave her some crackers and she was looking at it like it might eat her instead of the other way around.

"It helps to count the number of times you chew. twenty five should do it." I offered.

Eating food was one of the most difficult things since being restored, at least physically. As a Strigoi, you are on a strictly liquid diet. And although you could drink something other than blood, it all tasted pretty much the same. The only real taste came from blood. But the motion of drinking other liquids wasn't foreign. But eating, I hadn't eaten anything in months and for Sonya it had been years. The count helped to focus on another aspect of eating than the weird sensation of something solid in your mouth.

She took a very small bite of the cracker and I saw her count in her head. Once she presumably counted to twenty five, she swallowed. She looked down at the cracker again and took another bite, this time a little bigger. Once done with that bite, she put the cracker on her night-stand.

"Thank you."

It felt kind of good to help a person who went through the same thing. I had been the first person to be restored in recent history- at least that we knew off. I had to figure everything out on my own, and I was still figuring things out. But hopefully Sonya wouldn't have too.

"And not that I am not grateful, but why were you here again?"

I wanted her to know she didn't have to do this, not now. We had time, not a lot, but the last thing I wanted was to push Sonya to something she wasn't ready for.

"You asked me.." She swallowed. "...The other me, some questions, but I don't really remember."

"That is the confusion of the transformation. It will clear up in a few days." I reasured her, although we were torturing her, so maybe it was better if she didn't remember.

"We asked you about an account you were an emergency contact for. We believe it is connected to an illegitimate child of Eric Dragomir. We have to find him or her."

Sonya's eyes grew wide and she was panicking. Which means she did know. That was good. And we certainly had more chances of getting that information from this Sonya, than the other one. But still. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. You should focus on healing first."

Mikhail looked relieved and pulled Sonya closer to himself again.

"Why now? Why do you need to find he… the child? "

She nearly revealed who it was. Did she mean it was a girl? That would narrow it down, somewhat. And it meant Sonya probably not just knew of the child, but knew the child.

"Because he or she is needed." I started to explain what was happening at Court and how important it was for Lissa to get her quorum. Sonya apparently hadn't kept up with Moroi politics because she hadn't realized Tatiana was dead. She wanted to know about Lissa. I forgot that she once taught Lissa and Rose and helped them escape. I told her that Rose was downstairs and that Lissa was the one to restore me. Maybe she would be more likely to help us if she was doing it for Lissa.

"I have to think about it. I promised I would never tell. I can't…" She was fidgeting and looked a lot worse than before. But I was glad she was thinking about it. I wouldn't force her. If she didn't tell us, we would find another way.

"Take you time."

I left Mikhail and Sonya upstairs to talk it over. Maybe Mikhail could convince her to tell us about the child.

I went into the kitchen myself to get something, I was starting to get hungry. Rose was in the kitchen. She had a mug of a warm liquid in her hands and when she saw me, she handed me a warm cup.

"It's hot coco. two packets." She winked and I took the cup. I blamed the warmness spreading through my body on the warm beverage and the heat of the Kentucky outside.

I guess I had well and truly entered the denial phase.