Foxxy: This has to be my favorite comment ever. Thank you so so much for continuing to read and taking the time to let me know your thoughts! That last chapter hit a little close to home for me too and the feelings were very real. I hope you continue to love this story as much as I do! Thank you!
Sage P.O.V.
I decided it was best to walk Pony home and prolong me heading back to Tim's place. I knew I was going to be in a world of trouble, but maybe I could sneak in a nap before I went back. Getting next to no sleep between the fight at Buck's and Pony's plea for help, I was nearly asleep on my feet.
All of that seemed to go out the door when I saw Tim through the window of the Curtis household. The talk I had with Tim the night of the rumble popped into my head. I slowed Pony down a bit and said, "Whatever you do, don't start yelling. Darry is going to be upset, but yelling back is only going to make things worse. He is going to feel like he failed you and that is going to be projected into anger. Trust me on this."
Pony nodded his head, looking more nervous than I had ever seen him. Who knew how everyone was going to react when we walked back in there. With so much loss and anger going around, it seemed like anyone could snap and do something they were later going to regret.
Like Pony's nature walk this morning.
A hand squeezed my shoulder, and I looked over to Pony. "Why are you nervous, Sage? You're bringing me back. I figured the gang would be grateful for that."
And he was right. But something about this seemed off. Tim being there was like a sign that I needed to turn around and walk the other way. He tolerated the Curtis's and nothing more. Even his worry for me only goes so far.
I wasn't able to give it anymore thought when Soda came flying out of the house, yelling for Pony. The rest of the gang slowly followed suit, walking out into the yard to see Pony for themself. Soda and Darry had him wrapped in a hug, similar to what went down at the hospital, but Darry pulled away quickly.
"You and I are going to have a serious talk later about what you did." I held my breath for Pony's response, but a quick head nod from him had me smiling. The kid listens when he wants.
An arm was draped over my shoulder and Steve was there pulling me into a side hug. "Everything okay?"
I sighed and leaned into him. "It will be." He pulled me closer, and I closed my eyes, resting my head on his shoulder.
"Tired?" I hummed in response and felt him chuckle. "Why don't you head inside and get some sleep?"
If only it were that easy. "Tim is probably waiting to beat my head in." I felt Steve stiffen at that comment, making me look up at him. "What?"
Steve glanced back over to the house and said, "It might be best if you head back to Tim's place." The warning bells from earlier were going off and a voice I had been avoiding called out, "Where the hell have you been?"
Steve's hold on me tightened some, keeping me locked into his side. My brother was standing in the doorway looking the worst he has ever been. Crutches were holding him up, but he was standing on both feet making me wonder just how weak he was. A bandage covered the side of his head, and I could see another one peeking out from beneath his collar. He was paler than usual, which was something I didn't think was possible. But the dark bags under his eyes were a dead giveaway. And even in his fragile state, I wanted nothing more than to slap him across the face.
The mood in the yard had shifted from the joy of having the youngest Curtis back in one piece, to uneasiness. Eyes were going back and forth to see who was going to make the first move and a few others had moved closer to stop anything physical from happening. Not like my brother could do much, but I think they were more concerned about me.
I glanced over to Tim and realized he was here because my brother was out. He had to of known I would bring Pony back here. But was he here to help Dallas or to help me? The look he gave me told me nothing, but I couldn't expect much from him. This was his best friend and most chances were, I came second to that. How many people here would welcome him back with open arms, not caring about what he tried to do? What he almost succeeded in?
I had to get out of here. Nothing I was going to say or do would be the right thing in their eyes. I could see it now. Them wanting me to be happy that I still had family living and not understanding the anger I had deep inside. How much one decision from my brother hurt me and that I couldn't simply "get over it".
"After all that I went through, you have nothing to say to me?" His words took a minute for me to process, but when they did, walking away wasn't an option anymore. He was going to get what he deserved.
Tim saw it coming and stood in front of me, blocking my view of him. "Let's go." I shook my head and tried to take a step forward, but between the hold Steve had on me and Tim blocking my path, I wasn't able to.
"Move Shepard." My voice was cold as it came out, and I knew the others were more worried about how I was talking to Tim rather than what I wanted to do to my brother.
A new hand grabbed my arm and Soda's voice was in my ear. "Honey, let's take a walk." Of all the people who could calm me down, Soda never failed. Despite the shit we had gone through, he was home, and his voice was like a welcoming hug. Something that I gravitated to even when I wasn't trying.
A gentle tug from him and I was following him away from the nightmare of my brother. "You should stay with Pony."
His hand moved from my arm to the intertwining of my fingers and gave a little squeeze. "You made sure he got home safely. The least I can do is return the favor." The two of you walked in silence for a bit until the Shepard house was within sight.
My mind had been going a mile a minute, trying to figure out what to do from here. What stops my brother from coming to Tim's house? The room I used above Buck's would no longer be empty, meaning my choices to stay were now very limited. I didn't even know if I wanted to move into Angela's old room, but my brother was making it hard for me to go anywhere else. Another thing to hate him for.
As my mind was spiraling, Soda stopped walking and put his hands on my shoulders. "I need you to get out of that pretty little head of yours. Nothing changes. The gang still loves you. You have plenty of places to stay. Don't let your brother take away your happiness." Easier said than done. Not everyone can live a life full laughter and joy like Soda does.
"I can't forgive him, Soda." He gave me a soft smile and ran a thumb over my cheek.
"No one is asking you to. He hurt you more than the rest of us and we all know that. Just because we are okay with things getting back to normal doesn't mean we expect you too as well. Take all the time you need. I'll be here every step of the way." In any other circumstance, I would've read more into what he was saying. But I was too focused on what to do next.
"I'm going to move in with Tim until I can figure something else out." The words just came out, but it felt like the right decision.
Soda chuckled and it had me looking up to him in confusion. "I don't think Shepard knows what he's getting into. Having you stay here is one thing, but how does he expect the gang to stay away."
"One gunshot would do the trick." Soda jumped at Tim's voice behind him, and I had to bite my lip from laughing.
"I didn't mean we would just walk in. Or-or stay here." Tim didn't say anything back but gave me a look to wrap up whatever we were doing. He walked inside and Soda ran a hand through his hair.
"Jesus, Sage. Can I talk you into staying anywhere else?" I gave him a small smile and wrapped my arms around him. He returned the gesture, and I breathed in as much of him as I could. I have no idea where we stand with each other, but I was going to take whatever comfort I could get right now.
"Thank you, Soda. You don't know how much I needed this." He gave me one last squeeze and let go.
"You know I'll always be here for you." For a while I didn't know that. But I can confidently say moving forward I can lean on him for anything. "Thank you for bringing Pony back. I don't know what happened and I don't think I want to know but thank you. Hopefully whatever you two talked about gets through to him."
Lord, I hope so too. If he can get through the rest of this year, I think he will be okay. But I don't mind keeping him on track. "I know what it's like to feel lost and pissed off at the world. He just needed a push in the right direction. Same thing Tim did for me." And it was true. Tim Shepard saved my life without even knowing it.
We said our goodbye's and I headed inside to face the one person who would easily end that saved life without giving it a second thought. Tim was sitting at the table drinking a beer and had another one set out across from him. I could feel his eyes on me the second I walked in and not let up. He was studying me and I had a good guess on why.
"You figure out where you are staying?" I realized he had heard what I told Soda outside and wanted to hear me say it to him.
"I don't have anywhere else to go that I would feel safe. The Curtis house would be my next option, but Darry doesn't have the heart to kick my brother out. And I don't have it in me yet to play nice around him." I looked up to see Tim nodding his head. He looked like he was thinking hard about something, and I knew it was best to wait for him to finish before I asked.
"I know you don't want Angela's room. I can't go in there and Curly hasn't been able to walk past it without getting pissed off. I'm thinking of selling the house and buying a new one. But I don't have the money yet, so we need to figure out what to do right now. If we move some stuff around, we can fit another mattress in my room. It will be tight, but it's the best option I can come up with right now."
My brother didn't give me a second thought that night. So many times since I've been back, he's left me high and dry. He doesn't care about anyone but himself and I came to accept that about him because I didn't know any better. But what Tim is willing to do for me is something I never in a million years would've ever expected. Which is why I couldn't stop the tears from falling.
I got up from my spot and walked over to his side of the table. Confusion was written all over his face, but he understood what was going on when put my arms around him. To my surprise, he returned the hug and said, "You've gone too much of your life fighting alone. Let me change that."