Chapter 9: Triangle
January 9, 2001 – Tuesday
The Magic Box
Buffy and Dawn were in the midst of a sparring matching as Giles watched. "Dawn, switch. Right lead," Giles instructed the younger Summers sister.
"So, you really think they might be able to help us?" Dawn asked as she positioned herself, right leg in front.
"You mean will they help us find out something about Glory? Yes, I think so," Giles said as Dawn hit Buffy with a right hook. "Dawn, you dropped your shoulder. The resources that the Watchers Council has at their disposal," he paused in his musing as his tone of voice changed to wistful, "I mean the Central Library alone is just..."
"Don't talk about the books again," Buffy mildly admonished. "You get all ..." she trailed off, failing to find the appropriate description, "and sometimes there's drool."
"Sorry," Giles apologized, "but we've really exhausted the materials I have here, and we're coming up empty." Dawn swung at Buffy with another right hook. "Dawn, you're still dropping your shoulder."
"Giles is right, Dawnie," Buffy agreed, "I know when you're going to go with your right."
Dawn smirked as she hit her sister with a left hook instead. "Little move I came up with," she teased.
Buffy chuckled. "At least your learning to switch it up." She glanced at Giles. "So, Glory's all you're going to talk to them about, right?" Buffy asked.
"Why don't you both take a break," Giles said as the sisters took a step back from one another.
"Answer Buffy." Dawn prompted.
"I'm not going to mention your name, Dawn," Giles eventually answered. "I wouldn't do that, I promise."
"But you're going to tell them about the Key?" Buffy asked. "That Glory's looking for something called the Key?"
"Well, knowing her goal is crucial. I mean, if anything helps them uncover her origins, her plans."
Dawn sighed. "Buffy and I know," she admitted as Buffy nodded in agreement.
"It's just I trust these Watchers about as far as ... you could throw them," Buffy added.
"Thank you very much," Giles remarked, though he wasn't that offended.
"And I got to say, I'm a little freaked out at the idea of them knowing anything that could point them to Dawn," Buffy admitted. "Not only about the Key, but about her being a Ranger."
Giles placed a comforting arm about both sisters' shoulders. "Truly, if I saw an alternative…If the Initiative were still around, I'd say we consider using them. But they're gone. Riley was our last link to the government—" He then remembered that Riley had not only left, but he had hurt both Buffy and Dawn in the process. "Sorry. Didn't mean to..."
"It's okay," the sisters' said in unison.
"You can say his name," Buffy added as she and Dawn gave an almost convincing smile. "We're doing alright. Right, Dawn?"
"Right, Buffy," Dawn agreed, "These things happen."
"People break up, they move on," Buffy continued. "For a while it feels like the end of the world, but in the big picture..."
"It's not so huge," Giles finished for his Slayer.
"Not so huge?" Dawn said. "Buffy just said it feels like the end of the world!"
"Don't you listen?" Buffy added and then she smiled. "Dawn and I are teasing. Sort of. We'll be okay."
"In the long run, we'll be okay," Dawn agreed.
"I do hate to go away if you two are feeling badly..." Giles admitted.
"Hey, any chance you might find out something about Glory," Buffy said. "Dawn and I are thrilled to have you gone."
0 – 0 – 0 – 0 – 0
"You're going away for a week? That's great!" Anya cried.
"Yes, yes, everybody seems delighted about it," Giles uttered sarcastically.
"Well, I get to run the store, right?" Anya asked.
"You... There's quite a lot for one person to do..." Giles said as he consulted a list. "The trashmen, for example. They've been making such a mess in the alley that the recycling people can't get in there to collect. Someone has to talk to them. Also, there's some health inspector who has decided that potions are technically food, and that we need a full inspection."
"I can take care of that," Anya told him.
"Food? Who's sitting around saying, hey, I could go for some tasty potion," Xander said shaking his head.
"I'm envious, Mr. Giles," Tara remarked. "A trip to England sounds so exciting and exotic." Then she remembered where Giles was from. "Unless you're English."
"Don't worry about the shop," Buffy said. "We can all help. Open up the shop and close it, deal with everyone..."
"I can help out after school," Lynn added. "I have experience since I help mom sometimes after school at The Green Witch Books."
"I can come by after school also," Dawn said.
"We can come by between classes," Willow added. "Usually I use that time to copy over my class notes with a system of different colored pens, but it's been pointed out to me that that's, you know, insane."
Tara smiled at her girlfriend. "I said quirky."
"Hello?" Anya called out. "I work here. I'll take care of everything."
"Yeah, Anya can do it," Xander agreed.
Anya smiled at her boyfriend. "Thank you, Sweetie. Well said."
"Anya, I trust you completely with the inventory and the money," Giles told the ex-vengeance demon. "But dealing with people, a certain finesse may be required..."
"I have finesse!" she countered. "I have finesse coming out of my bottom! I can completely lie to a health inspector. I can also distract him with coy smiles and bribe him with money and objects!"
"There, see?" Xander agreed. "She'll be great."
Dawn rolled her eyes. "Giles, don't worry. We'll help her take care of everything."
"Dawn's right, it'll be ship-shape. Better. It'll be shop-shape!" Willow added.
"Hey! Xander, they're talking to Giles like I'm not here! Make them stop!" Anya cried.
Giles rolled his eyes. "Perhaps I should call the airline…"
"I'm just trying to help out! Xander, tell her!" Willow cried.
"If it didn't risk exposing that I was a Power Ranger," Dawn said. "I would see about teleporting you to England."
"I appreciate the sentiment, Dawn," Giles said as he headed for the phone, deciding to schedule an earlier flight back.
"Well tell her I don't need her help!" Anya said as she and Willow looked at Xander
Xander looked at Buffy and Dawn as he decided to change the subject. "Hey, how goes the slaying?" he asked.
"We killed something in a convent last night," Dawn answered.
"In any other room, a frightening declaration. Here, a welcome distraction," Xander remarked gratefully while his girlfriend glared at him. "Tell us all about the killing."
"Pretty standard. Vampire staking," Buffy replied.
"We met a nun who let Buffy try on her wimple," Dawn added.
"Okay, now we're back to frightening," Xander remarked.
Summers Home
As Buffy walked past Joyce's room, she found the bedroom door open. Glancing inside she noticed that her mother's bathrobe was lying on the bed. She turned and entered the room just as Joyce exited her bathroom, fully clothed with a scarf wrapped around her head.
"You, with the actual clothing. Who are you?" Buffy said as she brought her wrist communicator to her lips. "Dawn! Come look at this!"
"Hard to recognize me, huh?" Joyce asked as she sat on the bed and leaned back against the headboard.
"No more bathrobe," Buffy said as her sister walked in behind her.
"Whoa," Dawn said as she smiled at Joyce.
"I looked at it today and there it was, all fuzzy and, and, blue, and…I couldn't stand it anymore," Joyce admitted to her daughters.
"Well the rest of us aren't going to miss it much either," Buffy interjected.
Dawn nodded in agreement. "It was getting a little ripe, Mom."
Buffy glanced at her sister and smiled. "Maybe we should burn it," she said teasingly.
"It would keep the bugs away," Dawn agreed, keeping the tease going.
"It doesn't smell," Joyce said before realizing that her daughters were making a joke at her expense. "Fine, fine, make the funny jokes at the expense of the woman with the hole in her skull." She leaned back as she closed her eyes.
"Come on, she's tired out," Buffy said as she and Dawn walked out of the room closing the door behind them. They head into her bedroom and sat on her bed.
Dawn leaned her head against Buffy's shoulder. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed that Riley's pictures were gone. "You took down his pictures," she said.
"Yeah," Buffy said. "Too much of a reminder for both of us."
"Buffy, have you cried?" Dawn wondered.
"Yeah, I have. I try to hide it though. I don't like people seeing me vulnerable like that," Buffy answered. "What about you?"
"Yes," Dawn replied. "Pretty much when I think of something that…"
"Yeah," Buffy said with a sigh. "I know."
"I know it wasn't fast, that it was gradual, but why didn't either of us see it?" Dawn wondered.
"I don't know," Buffy answered. "All I know is I'm both furious at him, and I blame myself."
"I blame myself, too," Dawn sighed. "If I hadn't told him that I worry about him being used to get at me…"
"I know, Dawn," Buffy said a she wrapped an arm around her sister. "Sometimes I imagine how I could have fixed things for both of us..."
"It'll get better. Won't it?" Dawn asked.
Buffy sighed. "I hope so. I mean, yeah. It has to. We'll just keep going on like we are, and it'll get better. Every day it'll be a tiny bit better."
"Every day?" Dawn asked hopeful.
"Not really. But it'll be better soon," Buffy said.
"It still feels all sudden to me," Dawn admitted. "With him gone where no one can talk to him."
Buffy nodded; she knew how that felt. Even though they both knew it had been gradual it still felt sudden to her as well. "Yeah. But you never know, maybe he'll come back. Like, he hates the jungle, or, maybe, he wants to try again. You and I could say the stuff we didn't get a chance to say."
January 12, 2001 – Friday
The Magic Box
"What about henbane?" Tara asked.
"Good," Willow agreed. "And hellebore. It's up and to the right."
Tara took down the vial and handed it to Willow. "Hellebore, one of my favourites."
"It's powerful stuff," Willow added as they walked over to the counter. "I tried to use it to de-rat Amy, and it didn't work. But I think it might have made her really smart. She keeps giving me these looks like she's planning something. Rubbing her paws together."
"Hey. What are you two doing?" Anya asked them.
"Oh, we're gonna try out a few spells," Willow replied.
"There's this thing you can do where you create light, and we thought, what if you could make, like, simulated sunlight…" Tara added.
"Yeah, so then, you know, there Buffy and Dawn is, middle of the night, and they find this whole nest of vamps, a-and then one of them just goes, 'Presto!'"
"Only it won't be 'presto' exactly," Tara remarked.
"And, and voom!" Willow cried. "There's a floating ball of sunlight. Vamps get dusty."
"You don't want to look right at it, though," Tara pointed out.
"That's swell, but you can't use this stuff," Anya remarked. Giles has only been gone two days and you're already causing trouble. You shouldn't do things while he's gone."
"He should not be here while your mother is out," Willow cried as Tara smiled.
Anya looked at her puzzled. "What? What's that, what are you doing?"
"The Cat in the Hat. The book," Tara explained. "This cat does all this mischief when these children's mother is away..."
"It's so cute. He balances a bunch of stuff, including this fish in a bowl," Willow added. "But don't try it for real when you're six, because then no more fish for five years."
"You're referencing literature I have no way to be familiar with," Anya remarked, annoyed. "You're trying to make me feel left out, and you're stealing!"
"I'm not stealing," Willow protested. "I'm just taking things without paying for them. In what twisted dictionary is that stealing?"
"Willow, maybe you should just pay," Tara uttered.
"Anya, Giles would totally be fine with this," Willow interjected. "Come on. It'll be fun. We'll show you how to do some stuff. You could be floating pencils by the end of the day."
Anya sighed. "Sometimes I miss having powers," she admitted, until she saw Willow's grin. "Oh! I know what this is! This is peer pressure! Any second now you're going to make me smoke tobacco and, and have drugs."
"Look how easy it is," Willow uttered, before focusing on two of her still unpaid for purchases. Suddenly they rose from the counter.
"Hey! Don't float the merchandise!" Anya grabbed the items out of the air.
Willow turned and motioned a few more pieces.
"Stop that!" Anya cried.
"Hey, look at this, my two favorite girls!" Xander remarked as he entered the shop. "Three favorite girls," he corrected, seeing Tara.
"Xander, Willow is quoting and floating and, and stealing! She's a burglar," Anya revealed.
"A burglar? Right. One of those the cunning, broad-daylight in front of everyone burglars!" Willow remarked. "Xander, I'm just doing a spell to help Buffy and Dawn."
Xander nodded, not really sure what to say.
"Xander, Giles left me in charge. Tell her that," Anya added.
"Hey, hey, Judge Xander requesting a recess here," Xander remarked, glancing at the two of them uneasily.
"You really shouldn't pull him into this," Tara commented.
"Yeah, see? Tara's with me," Xander moved to stand beside the blonde witch. "Protect me, Tara." He pulled Tara in front of him. "Bet you're sorry you said anything, huh, Tara?" he said jokingly as Tara nodded.
"See, Xander, what I'm doing, it's a good thing," Willow argued. "And if it doesn't work, And if it doesn't work, then Giles never even has to know—" As she spoke, she took a pinch of powder from the pestle and mortar on the counter and sprinkled it on the cash register.
Which promptly disappeared in a puff of smoke.
"Oops," Willow uttered.
"The cash register!" Anya cried, panicked. "What did you do with the cash register? Dear god!"
"I'll fix it, I'll fix it!" Willow uttered with a wave of her hand. "Er, Recursat."
Fortunately for all concerned, the cash register reappeared, with a paper receipt trailing out of it, possibly charging for loss of profits in its temporary absence.
Willow breathed a sigh of relief. "There, all back. Good as new."
"Money. Did you hurt the money?" Anya asked as she pressed for the release of the tray to check. "Money good?" She took out some notes and shook them in the direction her boyfriend. "She endangered the money!"
"Of course, that's what she cares about," Willow muttered. "'I like money better than people," she said imitating Anya. "People can so rarely be exchanged for goods and or services.'"
"Xander, she's pretending to be me!" Anya cried.
"Well, can you even believe how she's acting?" Willow countered.
"Okay, you know what? I'm tired of being the one in the middle," Xander remarked. "I'm not going to let you pull me into this."
"I'm not," Willow protested, but he cut her off.
"Whatever the issue is between you two, just figure it out without me," Xander finished, before walking out of the shop.
"Xander, don't go!" Anya cried.
In vain as it turned out, for the door slammed behind his departing figure.
"You made him mad," Willow said.
The former vengeance demon glared at her. "Me?"
Tara started backing up gingerly, heading for the door.
"Tara, who do you think he was madder at?" Willow asked.
"Um, you know? I think, uh, maybe, maybe you guys have some stuff you need to work out, you know, just really ... talk," Tara remarked before walking out.
0 – 0 – 0 – 0 – 0
The nightly hour passed, leaving the witch and former vengeance demon staring at each other, until one decided to ignore the other, and the advice they had been given, by mixing up a potion.
"Fleabane," Willow remarked, sprinkling the stuff into the mortar.
"Fifteen cents," Anya remarked, tapping the amount into the cash register.
"Salamander eyes," Willow added the ingredient.
"Ten bucks for twelve," Anya added, tapping away. "Bargain."
"Bindweed," Willow uttered.
"Ugh, ooh, that's a pricey one," Anya murmured.
"Would you stop that?" Willow asked her. "It's very distracting. And ten for a dozen is outrageous for those eyes. They weren't even worth that much to the salamanders!"
Anya huffed. "Fine. Make your little ball of sunshine. I'll be quiet."
Willow missed the sarcasm in Anya's tone. "Good, because this spell is very sensitive. Once I begin, any non-ritual word can disrupt it."
"Fine," Anya forced the word out.
"Okay, here we go," Willow announced, pouring the mixed into a cauldron. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply.
"Did you start yet?" Anya asked.
"Shh, no! This is it," Willow cried. "Spirits of light, I invoke thee. Let the gloom of darkness part before you."
A small ring of sunlight rose from the cauldron and began to spin.
"Let the moonlight be made pale by your presence," Willow continued. "Spirits-"
"Is it done?" Anya asked.
"Shh!" Willow commanded, as the ring grew larger. "Spirits of light, grant my wishes."
"Sorry, I thought you were done," Anya apologized.
"Do you want to screw this up?" Willow yelled at her.
The ring of sunlight grew larger and spun a little unevenly.
"No. No.," Anya remarked. "I'm sure you can do that all on your own."
"Hey Anya, whatever really has you mad, why don't you just say it, like you do every other thought that stomps through your brain?" Willow countered.
"I believe I have said it," Anya protested.
"No. You haven't. Come on. Let it out!" Willow yelled.
The circle of sunlight, currently forgotten, suddenly dropped through the glass counter top, touching a large crystal within. The resulting combination produced a big flash of light, and a large demon appearing before them.
Forgetting their fight in favour of their fright, Willow and Anya shrieked and clutched at each other.
The large demon really resembled more of a troll or giant. He stumbled around, using the large hammer in his hand to regain his balance. He glanced at himself, then at the two girls before him, whereupon he roared loudly.
Anya and Willow shrieked again.
Roaring finished, the troll turned and raised his hammer, smashing the glass counter, sending merchandise flying.
"He's not a ball of sunshine," Willow uttered, before she and Anya silently agreed upon heading for the streets outside, running like hell.
Temporary Home of Sunnydale High School
Dawn sat in the lounge, staring down at her test form for the Sunnydale Career Fair. Banners were hung from the walls, reminding students that Career Fair Starts Tomorrow, and at a table across the room, the school guidance counselor sat sagely behind another sign which read, Vocational Aptitude Tests.
As Dawn lifted her eyes, she saw Lynn come in and grab a test, then walk over to join her. "Hey, baby," Dawn said as she leaned over and gave Lynn a quick peck on the lips. She looked back down at her test form. "Are you a people person or do you prefer keeping your own company?" she read solemnly from her test.
"I would say you are definitely a people person," Lynn said as she smiled at her girlfriend. "If you weren't, I don't think you would have been chosen to be a Ranger."
"True," Dawn agreed. "You know I'm kind of curious to find out what sort of career I could have."
"Same here," Lynn said. "One thing my mom always drilled into me is wanting to have a life separate from magic. I'm sure you want the same, a life separate from being a Ranger."
"I do," Dawn said.
They glanced up at the sound of the head cheerleader's voice. She was heading straight toward them, test form in hand, flanked by her fellow cheerleaders. "'I aspire to help my fellow man,'" she read aloud. "Check." She stopped, making a decisive mark on her paper. And then she cocked her head and frowned. "I mean, as long as he's not, like, smelly or dirty or something gross," she clarified.
Lynn and Dawn looked at each other and rolled their eyes as the cheerleaders passed.
Lynn glanced down the list of questions in front of her. Then she looked up with a frown. "Do I like shrubs?" she asked looking at Dawn.
"That's landscaping isn't it?" Dawn asked. "I like shrubs but I don't think I like it that much."
"Yeah," Lynn agreed and then she frowned.
"What?" Dawn asked as she looked at her girlfriend.
"You better finish quick," Lynn replied. "I'm hearing a call from Tara."
U.C. Sunnydale
"New semester, new classes," Buffy remarked to Tara in the more civilized setting of the Sunnydale university campus lecture halls. "Whole new vistas of knowledge to be confused and intimidated by."
"I think this one's going to be kind of fun," Tara commented. "Classics is gonna touch on so many things; mythology, history, philosophy..."
"The professor spit too much when he talked," Buffy whispered to her. "It was like being at Sea World. 'The first five rows will get wet.'"
Tara laughed. "That was just, you know, um, enthusiasm."
"It seemed very much like saliva," Buffy replied.
"We'll sit farther back next time," Tara proposed.
"Good plan," Buffy agreed. "I need to keep this course. The only other thing that fits into my schedule is Central American Geopolitics and no thanks. I even hear the word jungle and all I can think of is him. Like, is that the one Riley's in. I don't need a daily two o'clock knife in the heart."
"Oh. I'm sorry," Tara said sympathetically. "Is it that bad?"
"Sort of for both Dawn and I," Buffy replied. "But we're both okay if we don't think about it too much. I don't know about Dawn but I think I'm starting to get more perspective on it. Like maybe he's doing what he's supposed to be doing. I'm starting to think, maybe he had to go where they needed him. Maybe it's all better in the long run."
"Willow says things always happen for a reason," Tara admitted.
"Yeah, but you ever notice, people only say that about bad things. Someone says that to you... something very bad just happened," Buffy said. "But not for me the furrowed brow," she added, smiling. "What do you say we go pick up Willow and indulge ourselves in a little after-school hamburger?"
Tara nodded. "I guess we could. She might still be at the Magic Box. I was there earlier, and she and Anya kind of got in this little squabble ... Xander and I sort of cleared out, he was pretty upset."
Buffy stopped as she looked at Tara with concern. "Anya and Xander are in trouble?" she asked.
"Oh!" Tara said realizing what she just did. "No. I said that all wrong...it was nothing. Willow and Anya were sort of fighting and Xander kind of snapped at both of them and he left."
"He left? He left Anya?" Buffy asked.
Tara knew she hadn't made things better, so she tried a different tact. "Um… no. Not left her, left her. He just left. It was only a little thing. Really."
"A little thing. See, thing is, a little thing gets bigger," Buffy said working herself up. "You don't catch the little thing and then boom; you've got this whole huge thing." She burst into tears. "No!"
"Oh dear," Tara said watching her friend crying.
"Not them!" Buffy hiccupped. "With the... the... little thing! They can't... can't break up!"
"I think..." Tara started and then she muttered under her breath. "Lynn!"
"They have a... a... beautiful love!" Buffy wailed.
"I think they'll be fine..." Tara offered.
Buffy grabbed Tara and she cried on the blonde witch's shoulder while Tara patted her back awkwardly. "Mmrccllvv."
"What?" Tara asked.
Buffy raised her head, surreptitiously wiping her nose on Tara's shirt. "A miraculous lo—lo—love!"
"Buffy?" Dawn said as she and Lynn strolled forward.
"It's my fault," Tara admitted. "I said some stuff about Xander and Anya and it got Buffy…"
Dawn and Lynn nodded in understanding. They pulled Buffy into their arms. Lynn looked around and seeing they were alone she orbed out with Buffy and Dawn.
Streets of Sunnydale
Meanwhile, across town, Giles' car,- which the Willow and Anya had managed to appropriate from his and apartment, raced along the roads after the trail of chaos which the giant troll had left in his wake, when he exited the Magic Box, having tired of trashing the store for the moment.
"There, that parked car!" Anya cried. "We're still on his trail."
Willow continued to peer at the spell books before her while Anya drove. "I don't even get how we made that guy, because, wow, advanced!"
"No one made him," Anya corrected. "He must have been trapped in that crystal, and you released him."
"I released him?" Willow echoed. "No, this was definitely a we thing. Or, or a you thing! It definitely feels like a you thing."
"Look, just find the reversal spell," Anya cried. "And hurry! Look what he did to that lamppost!"
"I'm trying," Willow uttered. "Put the top up, the pages are all blowy!"
"Well, I don't know how to put the top up, I only just figured out what the left pedal does." Anya smiled at her. "It makes us stop!" She slammed on the brakes, making the tires screech on the asphalt, causing Willow to grab the side door handle for balance.
Anya resumed driving.
"You don't know how to drive?" Willow asked her in horror. "Why didn't you say you don't know how to drive? I don't know how to drive; you might have said."
"Well, I couldn't know if I could until I tried, could I?" Anya countered.
"This is very, very bad," Willow murmured. "There, there's an ogre on the loose and…"
"Troll," Anya corrected.
"What?" Willow asked.
"Troll on the loose," Anya said. "Now hold on, I'm going to press the right pedal harder. I expect us to accelerate."
"There's a troll on the loose, and you're going to crash Giles' car!" Willow yelled over the increasing engine noise.
Anya nodded complacently. "It's likely. We're going very fast. You should have listened to me and not done the spell. Giles left me in charge."
"Giles can be an idiot. The smart kind. But still," Willow admitted.
"Xander agreed," Anya added.
"Oh, right. Xander doesn't step out of line," Willow murmured.
Anya looked at her. "Well, what do you mean by that?"
"Nothing," Willow turned her gaze to the road.
"Just find that spell quickly!" Anya yelled as she increased the speed once more.
The Bronze
"Hey, watch it," Spike growled as someone brushed past him. "Oh, it's you," he uttered, catching sight of Xander.
"Spike, don't let me stop you from not being here," Xander commented.
"I was her first, you know," Spike retorted.
"Uh-huh. Go away," Xander placed his hands on the counter of the bar.
"Now why would I do that, when it's bugging you so much having me here?" Spike countered. "They have beer, and those chicken wings too. Also, a sort of a flower-shaped thing they make from an onion. It's brilliant."
"Are you talking to me hoping that I'll get so depressed that I'll impale myself on a fork right in front of you?" Xander asked.
"Lovely thought," Spike remarked with a grin. "If I don't hurt you myself, the chip wouldn't zap me. I could eat you that way. Beat the onion thing all to hell." He reached out and grabbed a handful of peanuts.
Xander slapped his hand away. "Hey, those are mine!"
"My, my. Someone's in a temper," Spike commented. "This all sympathetic misery borrowed from the Slayer or the nibblet?"
"What?" Xander replied. "No. Nothing to do with Buffy or Dawn."
"So, they're fine then. Not... holding grudges," Spike asked.
"What are you talking about?" Xander asked clearly confused. "What does Buffy and Dawn have to do with anything? What grudges?"
"Huh. Yeah," Spike said. "Okay, don't need to talk about them. I'm sure they're merrily slaying some pals of mine, having a grand old time."
The Magic Box
"This is very bad." Buffy remarked as she, Dawn and Lynn looked around the demolished store. After she had managed to get her emotions under control, she remembered what Tara had said and Lynn had orbed them to the shop to check on their friends.
"Willow? Anya?" Dawn called out.
Lynn went to the back room, but soon returned empty handed. "They're not back there either, they're gone. Something's been here."
"Yeah," Buffy replied. "Dawn, you better morph. This thing's probably leaving a huge trail. So, we're bound to run into it."
"Right," Dawn agreed as she reached around her back and pulled out her morpher. "It's Morphin' Time! Zeo Ranger Six White!"
The Bronze
"And they get in these fights, and they're both looking at me like I'm the referee," Xander continued to pour his trouble out to Spike over a game of pool. "Also, sometimes I'll say something about Anya, and Willow will get this look, this, um, 'what the hell do you see in her,' look."
Spike nodding in feeling. "I know that look. Lot of people never really got Dru, you know."
"Well, she was insane," Xander remarked, causing Spike to look momentarily insulted, before slightly nodding in agreement. "Then it's like, well, I get all torn. Because, Willow's my best friend and I really value her opinion, but, uh, Anya's my girlfriend, you know?"
"What's the Slayer and the nibblet think of all this friction in the ranks?" Spike asked. "Can't be good for morale."
Xander shrugged. "I don't know."
"They're a little pre-occupied, maybe," the vampire continued. "It's understandable. What with all the upset, all the blaming of innocent bystanders that got caught up in the mess."
"What?" Xander asked confused.
"I mean, did either of them want to be made a fool of?" Spike asked angrily. "And what does someone have to do to make it right?" He stumbled as someone brushed past him. "Hey, watch it, mate." Suddenly he caught sight of the troll. "On second thought, do what you like."
"Ale! Yes!" the troll cried and walked over to one of the Bronze's staff carrying kegs in the direction of the store room. "Ah, fragrant ale!" he cried. "I have been trapped for many centuries and along with my taste of freedom I would appreciate the taste of a fine grain-based beverage!" He lifted up a keg to drink.
"So, uh ... think I should run and get Buffy and Dawn?" Xander asked Spike, who shrugged.
The troll threw the empty keg to the ground. "Barmaid! Bring me stronger ale, and some plump, succulent babies to eat," he demanded of a nearby waitress.
"I'm going to run and get Buffy and Dawn," Xander decided. "Or maybe you could fight him."
"Yeah, I could do that, but I'm paralyzed with not caring very much," Spike replied.
"You there!" the troll caught sight of them and strode toward them. "Do you know where there are babies?"
Spike turned to Xander. "What do you think, the hospital?"
"What? Shut up!" Xander turned to the troll. "Um…listen…"
"I find myself very hungry," the troll said. "And when I'm hungry I grow short of patience."
"Well, we can take care of the hungry, so how's about you just sit down in one of the ... sturdier chairs, and we can ... have a calm talk and something to eat," Xander suggested soothingly.
"Can it be babies?" the troll asked.
"Well, not so much," Xander added. "But maybe ... some roast pigs, and ... stags, and ... much hearty grog!"
"They have this onion thing..." Spike began.
"You cannot appease me! Do not try!" the troll cried. "More ale!"
Spike and Xander took good use of the Troll's turning to the bar and darted to the door. Opening it, they were confronted with Anya and Willow.
"Xander! You shouldn't be here. There's a troll," Anya warned, putting her arms around him.
"Uh, a big guy? Hammer?" Xander asked her. She nodded. "I think I noticed him," he added, pointing to where the troll was draining another keg of beer.
"I wish Buffy and Dawn were here," murmured Willow.
The door opened and Buffy and the White Zeo Ranger ran in, followed by Lynn. "We're here," Buffy uttered.
"I wish I had a million dollars," Willow uttered, making everyone glance at her. "Just checking."
"What's going on? Where did he come from?" Buffy asked as Tara came in behind them. "And who trashed the Magic shop?"
Tara immediately was at Willow's side pulling her girlfriend into her arms. "I'm so glad you're okay."
Spike stared at Buffy as he stepped toward her tentatively. "Hello, Buffy." Buffy shot him a look and he stepped back.
"Willow stole ingredients and released him from a purple crystal. He's a troll," Anya explained.
"You did this?" Lynn asked her fellow witch.
"Me? No, we. I mean, us," Willow argued, gesturing to Anya. "Uh, her. It's very complex."
"We can stop him," Anya stated. "Willow, do the spell."
"Uh, let the conjuring be..."
"Stop!" the troll cried.
"Nobody lets me finish!" Willow protested annoyed as Lynn laid a comforting hand on her arm.
"I know the feeling," Lynn admitted.
"You ... told the witch to do that, Anyanka," the troll said, looking at the former vengeance demon. "You seem determined to put an end to all my fun. Just like you always did when we were dating!"
All at once Buffy, Dawn, Lynn, Tara, Willow, Spike and Xander stared at Anya.
"Uh, um…" Anya began nervously.
"You dated him?" Xander sought to confirm.
"You dated a troll?" Buffy and the White Zeo Ranger asked in unison.
"And we're what, surprised by this?" Willow added.
"Well, Olaf wasn't a troll then!" Anya protested. "You know, he was just a big dumb guy, and ... well, you know, he cheated on me and I made him into a troll, which by the way is how I got the job as a vengeance demon."
The troll roared and then hit the counter with his hammer.
"We're forgetting about the troll," Tara reminded them. "Let's pay attention to the troll."
"I did not cheat! Not in my heart," the troll said before looking at Buffy and the White Zeo Ranger. "It was only one wench! I, I had had a great deal of mead! Next thing I know, I'm a troll! Ohh ... ohh ... you did this, Anyanka. You will die for this."
"But, but you seem to enjoy the, the being a troll," Xander pointed out.
The troll shrugged. "I adjusted. And then what happened? Witches. Filthy, dirty, disgusting witches. They trapped me. I was imprisoned in that crystal for centuries. Ohh, a curse on all witches! All must die!"
"Willow…Lynn," Buffy requested.
Willow held the book so Lynn could read the page. "Let the conjuring be undone. Return the beast to native form," they chanted.
"Witches, you must stop!" Olaf roared.
"Keep it far from us and ours as long as my voice shall sound," Willow and Lynn finished.
Nothing happened, causing Olaf to laugh. "It did not work!"
Willow hurriedly began skimming the page. "Okay, wait! Uh, Let the conjuring..."
Seeing Olaf lung toward her and Willow, Lynn orbed out with Willow just as Buffy and the White Zeo Ranger sent a kick to his chest. They drove him backwards, kicking and punching.
Seizing Olaf, the sisters shoved him on to the pool table, grappling for the hammer.
Olaf pushed the Slayer and the Ranger away, causing them to fall back on to the floor. They got up in time to witness him smashing his hammer into the pillars which supported the mezzanine floor of the nightclub. The resulting shake caused people to run. He then smashed another pillar, sending the mezzanine crashing to the floor.
0 – 0 – 0 – 0 – 0
"Dawn!" Lynn cried as she rushed to help lift away the large piece of wood which was crushing her girlfriend.
"Where is he?" Buffy asked as she too rushed to help Dawn.
"Gone," Willow informed her best friend.
"Xander, follow him," Buffy ordered as she and Lynn helped Dawn to her feet. "Lynn, Anya and Willow head back to the magic shop, find a spell that will actually stop him." Lynn nodded as she moved next to Anya and Willow and orbed out with them. "Tara, you, me and Dawn will help with the victims."
Orders received the Scoobies nodded and began shifting debris out of the way.
Dawn suddenly noticed who was working beside her. She opened her mouth to send him away. "Nibblet, I got someone here. Help me get 'er out," he told the Power Ranger. Dawn hesitated, before reaching in and helping Spike free the victim.
The Magic Box
Lynn, Willow and Anya orb into the destroyed store. "Forget spells to put him back into the crystal," Willow said. "'Cuz that didn't go too well. We need another way—"
"This is a terrible mess," Anya said looking around.
"Maybe later we can hide some of the broken stuff—" Willow suggested.
Lynn's Whitelighter senses picked up on one of her unofficial charges was in the room with them. "Will," she said as they spun to face Giles. She waved. "I take it you got an earlier flight."
Giles smiled. kind of a creepy, manic, I'm not going to let this bother me smile. "There was only one undamaged statue of the Goddess Lithra in the world. This was it!"
"And you've got the wrong head there," Anya pointed out. "That's a head from a dog statue."
Giles looked at what he was holding. "So, it is! Funny!"
"Um... Giles?" Willow said. "Could you maybe make an angry face? 'Cuz the smile is kind of scaring me."
Giles continued to smile. "The damage. Was it a demon?"
"Troll," Anya corrected. "Willow released him during some thievery."
"Anya's fault," Willow retorted as Lynn rolled her eyes. "He collapsed the loft at the Bronze. Buffy and Dawn are there helping people. We're going to find magicks to stop him."
"A troll. Fine. I'm going to…going to… do something!" Giles stated.
"You can yell at us or go help Buffy and Dawn rescue the innocent," Willow offered as Giles hesitated. "I understand it's difficult."
"I will rescue the innocent!" Giles said. "Lynn, if you wouldn't mind."
"Sure," Lynn said as she walked over to Giles and they orbed out.
The Bronze
Buffy was on the dangling section of loft, leaning over the edge. She lowered an injured girl over the edge to Tara and Dawn as a few paramedics work behind them.
"Got her!" Tara and Dawn said.
Tara then led the girl away.
As Buffy flipped herself gymnastically to the ground off the edge of the loft Dawn turned and saw Spike tending an injured woman.
"What are you doing?" Dawn asked.
"Making this woman more comfortable," Spike answered. "I'm not sampling, I'll have you note. I mean, look at all these lovely blood-covered people, I could... but not a taste for Spike. Not a lick. Knew your big sis wouldn't like it."
"You want credit for not feeding off bleeding disaster victims?" Buffy asked in surprise.
"Well... yeah," he agreed.
"You're disgusting," Buffy and Dawn said as they turned and walked away.
"What does it take?" he asked.
The Magic Box
"Hurry up!" Willow cried. "I'm taking everything on relocation spells, suspension spells, and, what the heck, spells to make him really sleepy, 'cause, slightly better."
"In case we need 'em, I'm getting more of all the things Willow stole," Anya remarked, arming herself with potion supplies.
"I didn't - why do you do that?" Willow asked.
"What?" Anya asked.
"You're so rude! I mean, sure, at first, ex-demon, doesn't know the rules. Well, you been here forever," Willow told the ex-vengeance demon. "Learn the rules."
"Rules are stupid," Anya remarked.
"Great, whatever. I just thought you might be interested in learning to act more human. Some of us enjoy it. Oh, look for, uh, spells with dimensional portals too."
"I am a human. And there are ... many humans who are stranger than me," Anya protested.
"Uh-huh, but, unless I'm really wrong about crazy Larry down at the bus stop, he's probably not gonna turn Xander into a troll."
"Well, now, that's a very complicated proced..." Anya stopped in sudden realization. "Oh. You think I'm going to hurt Xander? I would never hurt Xander! You really think I would do that!"
"Anya, it's what you do. You spent what, a thousand years hurting men?" Willow asked.
"I was a demon then, and, and I don't even have any powers now!" Anya offered up an entry from one of the books around them. "Is this the spell?"
"Only if you want him to double in size, and grow extra arms, which ... let's not," Willow answered. "By the way, you weren't a demon when you turned Olaf into Lord of the Hammers," Willow told Anya. "You managed that. Also, there's other ways to hurt Xander."
"I don't do magic now," Anya pointed out. "You're the one with that kind of power. In fact, D'Hoffryn offered you my old job! You're closer to being a vengeance demon than I am, maybe Xander should be afraid of you."
"Xander's my best friend!" Willow cried to Anya.
"Oh, and you don't want anyone else to have him," Anya continued. "I know what broke up him and Cordelia, you know. It was you! And your lips."
Willow rolled her eyes. "No, it was not! Well, yes it was so! But that was a long time ago! You think I'd do that again?"
"Why not?" Anya asked.
"Hello! Gay now!" Willow reminded the ex-vengeance demon.
"But you're always doing everything you can to, to point out how much I'm an outsider," Anya told Willow. "You've known him since you were squalling infants together. You'll always know him better than I do. You could sweep in and, and poison his mind against me."
"You're insane! I am not going to take him away and I am not going to hurt him," Willow yelled at Anya.
"Well, I'm not either!" Anya yelled.
The sound of the door being smashed in brought them back to the situation at hand.
"Aha!" Olaf cried as he walked up to them. "I knew it. You three, performing more spells. I could be out pillaging, devouring babies, making merry with the local virgins, but instead, I had to come all the way back here to kill you."
"No, get away from them!" Xander cried as he ran inside.
"I will get away from them, after I kill them," Olaf replied to Xander
"You are not touching these women," Xander said, running at him.
Olaf held out his hammer, and Xander impacted upon it, wincing as he fell down. The troll picked him up by the shirt. Xander attempted a swipe at his face. Olaf aimed the hammer at him, sending him across the room.
Xander rose from the floor.
"Ah, you wish for more? Admirable!" Olaf cried.
Xander ran forward and punched him once more. He raised his arm to punch again, but the troll grabbed the arm with one hand, using the other which held his hammer to hit the boy again.
Xander fell to the floor. Olaf grabbed him and slid him into another display cabinet, smashing the glass.
Undeterred, Xander rose and mounted the stairs which led to the books at the back of the shop. Midway he launched himself at the troll.
Olaf caught him easily and sent him back to the floor. "You fight well, although you are a tiny man," he laughed. "I shall reward you. Only one of your women shall die, and you shall be the one to choose!"
Willow turned to Anya. "Did he just say-"
Olaf laughed, cutting off whatever she was about to say. "Ha ha. Choose! Anyanka or the witch. One of your women must die."
"No," Xander replied. "You are one crazy troll, I ... I'm not choosing between my girlfriend and my best friend. That's insane troll logic."
"Go, Xander," Anya cheered. "I love you."
Olaf laughed again. "Good for you. You are a loyal man." He grabbed Xander's wrist and snapped the bone inside the skin.
"Xander!" Willow and Anya cried.
"Now. Choose!" Olaf roared.
"Olaf, no!" Anya cried at the troll.
"Lynn!" Willow called out. "Bring Buffy and Dawn."
"I'm not choosing," Xander protested through his pain.
"Then you shall be the one who dies," Olaf decided, raising his hammer.
"No!" Anya cried. "Choose me! Just don't take him! Don't take Xander!" she pleaded as Olaf and Xander looked at her.
Willow grabbed some powder and threw it at the troll. "E conspectu abeat monstrum," she enchanted.
The cash register decided to disappear again.
"Damn," Willow uttered.
The White Zeo Ranger appeared in a beam of white light. She was followed a second later by blue and white orbing lights solidifying into Buffy, Lynn, Tara and Giles.
"Buffy! Dawn!" Anya cried.
"Tara, stay back!" Willow called out to her girlfriend.
"The hammer! The strength's in the hammer!" Anya warned.
"White Zeo Power Sword!" the White Zeo Ranger called out as Olaf swung the hammer at her. She barely managed to block his swing.
"The hammer," Lynn said as she rushed to the counter, she began mixing ingredients as Willow and Anya joined her.
"How can I help?" Anya asked.
"Distract him from Dawn and Buffy," Willow suggested as she began helping Lynn. "uh, piss him off."
"I don't know how," Anya murmured.
"Anya, I have faith in you. There is no one you cannot piss off," Willow assured her, causing the former vengeance demon to smile with pride. "Lynn, what are we working on?"
"Taking his hammer out of the fight," Lynn answered.
Anya rushed to where the slayer and the troll were fighting over possession of the hammer. "Hey Olaf! You're as inadequate a troll as you were a boyfriend! Uh, you're hairy, and unattractive, and even women trolls are put off by your various odours."
"Instrumentum ultionis, telum fabuloso, surge, surge, terram pro voca," Willow and Lynn chanted at the hammer, which glowed green for a moment, as its master lifted the White Zeo Ranger by the throat.
Buffy hit Olaf and with the hammer he swatted her back.
"Your menacing stance is merely alarming!" Anya cried. "And your roar is less than full-throated!"
"Desist!" Olaf cried, tossing the Ranger to the floor and turning on his former girlfriend. "My god, woman, it's been a thousand years, and yet you are as aggravating and emasculating as ever you were." He swung the hammer.
"Vola cum viribus, dominum tuum nega. Vola!" Willow and Lynn cried.
The hammer glowed green once more and flew out of Olaf's hand mid swing.
"Hey, good job," Anya praised.
"You too, very irritating," Willow uttered in kind.
"So. Your power's in your hammer?" Buffy asked before she and the White Zeo Ranger rushed toward him.
Olaf swiped them back toward the floor once more.
"Oh, yeah! I forgot he still has all that troll strength," Anya apologized.
"You shall all die! I will dispense no mercy now!" Olaf roared.
Buffy and the White Zeo Ranger rose and punched him in the face continuously.
"What are you two fighting for?" Olaf asked the Slayer and the Ranger as he tossed them back to the floor. "Your friends? These two? They will never last. Anyanka is very difficult to live with, and he's ludicrous and far too breakable. Their love will never last."
Determined, the sisters rose to their feet and in tandem flipped herself over Olaf's head. He bent over, and they spun round to kick him in the chest, this time driving him across the room.
"They've got him now," Willow uttered.
"Poor baby," Anya mourned at her boyfriend's wrist.
Lynn held her hands over Xander's wrist. "I thought it had to be magic related," he asked.
"I think being broken by a troll would count," Lynn admitted as she smiled at her friend.
"You really dated him?" Xander asked his girlfriend as Lynn's hands began to glow golden.
Anya grimaced. "Yes."
"But you like me better, right?" Xander sought.
"Yes! Willow likes you too, but not in a sexy way 'cuz she's gay, and she won't break us up so it's all okay," Anya said.
Buffy and the White Zeo Ranger hit Olaf hard enough that he fell to the floor and into unconsciousness.
0 – 0 – 0 – 0 – 0
Buffy and Dawn stood over the unconscious Olaf. Buffy held holds his hammer.
"Let the transposition be complete," Willow and Lynn uttered as Olaf dissolved into nothingness.
"Where did you send him?" Giles asked.
"The land of the trolls," Anya replied. "He'll like it there. Full of trolls."
"It's hard to be precise, though," Willow added. "Alternate universes don't stay put. Trying to send him to a specific place is sort of like ... like ... trying to hit a ... puppy, by throwing a live bee at it. Which is a weird image, and you should all just forget it."
"It's possible that he's in the land of perpetual Wednesday ... or the crazy melty land ... or, you know, the world without shrimp," Anya added.
"There's a world without shrimp?" Tara asked. "I'm allergic," she added to Willow.
"He's probably in troll land," Willow uttered.
"I only care that he's not here, and Dawn and I got this nifty souvenir," Buffy replied, putting the hammer on the counter top.
Which promptly collapsed under the weight.
"Oops," Buffy looked apologetically at Giles.
"Not our fault," Willow said as she and Anya looked away.
Well, yes. I suppose it's minor, given the other..." Giles said looking around, "…devastation. I'm still not certain how he came to be smashing up my shop."
"An accident," Anya supplied.
"Not our fault," Willow added as Giles gazed at her and Anya skeptically.
"There, see how nice things worked out? And look at you guys..." Buffy said looking at Xander and Anya. "So good and alive and together." She started to cry again as she looked at Willow and Tara. "So together... and good... and alive..." She then looked at Dawn and Lynn. "I'm just so... happy for you!"
Giles looked around and noticed the cash register was missing. "Where's the cash register?"
Summers Home
Dawn, Buffy and Giles sat at the dining room table. "I cringe to think what would have happened if I'd been away for longer than three days," Giles murmured some hours later.
"Well, maybe we would have had time to clean it up," Buffy remarked. "You know, if Willow used some magic to help."
"Yes, because nothing could possibly go wrong with that," Giles returned.
"Rupert, I still don't understand why the other Watchers made you go all the way to England when they don't know anything," Joyce remarked as she carried in a tray of coffee cups from the kitchen.
"Well, they don't know it ... yet," Giles replied. "I mean, they have no record of, Glory or anyone like her, but based on the information that I've given them, they're going to look into it. They might have something soon."
"What about the Key?" Dawn asked nervously. "Were they all over it?"
"Yes," Giles replied. "Well, they're interested, certainly, and full of theories." He sipped his tea. "Most of them nonsensical."
"They don't know that it's in me," Dawn asked.
"No," Giles assured the Ranger.
"Giles, what happens if they figure it out? What would they do?" Buffy asked. "What would happen?"
"I don't know," Giles confessed.