Off To the Races

by Green Kneesocks

Kageyama Hana and her husband, Ichimaro, loved their daughter, they really did, but they could not take care of her. Not when they had a son to worry about. Giving her up was the best thing for everyone. Suzuki Touichirou especially. Fem!Mob Mob raised in Claw AU. Chapter 663 has been rewritten!

981. Just Like Old Times

It was kind of like old times.

"It's perfect." Said Mob as she stepped into the room that they were all going to be sharing. It was going to be just like it had been in her dreams, no, like it had been when she had been little. Because those hadn't been dreams, they had been reality, and in fact what she thought had been reality had really been the dream.

It was kind of confusing.

So she didn't think about that. Instead she stuck close to Sho and followed him until he picked a spot. This was kind of an old fashioned place, you slept on futons on the tatami floor, but that was ok. She was kind of used to old fashioned things. That spirit hadn't really be able to copy things from her life that well so it picked things from it's.

His. It had been a boy spirit.

"This looks like a good spot, right Sho?" asked Mob as she pointed to a spot under the window. That was where she would have slept if she had been him, just to see all the colors. The world had been so grey, before, in her…in her dream. There was so much color to it now even if it was dark out. If she had been Sho she would have wanted to sleep where she could see the whole world. But she wasn't Sho, she was Shigeko…Mob. She was Mob. She was Sho's big sister!

She was his big sister and what she wanted, what she wanted more than anything else in the world, was to be near her little brother.

"It's fine, I guess." said Sho. What he really wanted to do was sleep in his own bed in his own room…in their own room. They were supposed to sleep in the same room. That was how it had been since they had been little, since he had been born even. They weren't supposed to be apart…not anymore, anyway. Baby Sis was with them, well she was back in Tokyo but same difference, and he had no reason to leave her…aside from…

From stuff that didn't feel like it really mattered anymore.

"Are you sure? We can be somewhere else if you want." Said Mob as she held her futon close to her chest. Sho shrugged and unfolded his with his powers…powers that they both had. She was actually stronger than he was. She was stronger than everyone else in this room, maybe even the whole world aside from Dad. Without her powers she wasn't anything. She wouldn't have had anything if not for her powers…so she was something. She was someone.

Out here she was someone. Someone who was going to unroll her futon and sleep next to her little brother like she had been for the majority of her life.

"I don't care." Said Sho. He didn't care where they were just so long as they were together. He didn't know how he could have thought that she would have left him. He was the one who was always leaving her…but he had to. Before, so he could have seen Baby Sis, and afterwards because he and Fukuda were saving the world…but fuck the world!

And yeah, he knew that it was a pretty awful thing to think, but fuck the world if it meant that he had to be away from Big Sis…from the person who cared about him most of all.

"Well I do." Said Minegishi as they took the spot in the far corner. They weren't a fan of shared sleeping arrangements, they never had been, and the only concessions they would make were for Mob or Ryou. Napping…well, they could nap anywhere, mostly because they could pass out anywhere, but deliberately going to sleep for the night was a whole other thing entirely.

They were going to have enough trouble falling asleep tonight as it was. They didn't need to make it any worse than it already was.

"What's wrong? Are you sad? Scared? Do you want to go home? We still have that car that you borrowed-" said Mob. She felt the room shake, she saw her aura and then everyone else's, too, as they reacted to her…she needed to calm down. Like Dad had always said.

Power was nothing without control.

"Mob, no. I'm fine." Said Minegishi quickly. She was freaking out…of course she was. She had, once again, gone off and done something stupid. Something that could have been life endingly stupid. Minegishi didn't know what in the hell they were even supposed to do here? They wanted to comfort her and strangle her in equal measures!

Obviously they were going to comfort her…but still!

"And I'm not driving again. I don't care if I'm the only one who can control the fucking thing, I'm not sitting in the driver's side again. That's the side you're most likely to die in if there's ever a crash!" said Hatori as he put his stuff down and pulled a blanket over his head. No way was he taking his own life, and everyone else's lives, into his own hands again! He knew better than to trust himself!

He liked being in charge but not if it meant having that level, that real life two ton death machine level, of responsibility!

"I wouldn't let you die." Said Shimazaki as he teleported over to Hatori and pulled the blanket down.

"That's actually really-" said Hatori

"I'd just let you get maimed or seriously injured." Said Shimazaki before he teleported over to Toshi's side.

"-completely on brand for you." said Hatori as he pulled the blanket back up over his head. He wasn't tired, not really, he just kind of didn't want to be awake anymore. This whole day had just been too much. He wished that he'd been with Suzuki. Stuff happened but Suzuki was always the one in control and he'd never let anything happen to Hatori. Mob liked him too but there was only so much she could do to keep him safe.

"Shimazaki…um…please be nice. To Hatori, I mean, and…and also to everyone, I guess." said Mob as she sat down and turned to face away from him. She couldn't look at him now, she didn't think that she could look at him ever. Not after…the whole thing had happened both a long time ago and also just now. Sleeping with her best friend's boyfriend and also…that spirit hadn't really been able to make a lot of new things, or maybe it had been easier to draw from Mob's memories…or maybe it had just been looking for things that Mob had wanted to forget.

Like what it was like to sleep with Shimazaki.

"I am nice!" said Shimazaki as he laid his head down on Toshi's shoulder. He could feel them rolling their eyes, but their aura sounded pretty fucking happy, so he was going to take this as a win. He didn't know what Mob was being so weird about but as long as Toshi was coming around he was happy.

As much as he loved Mob they were broken up so Toshi was back to being his singular number one.

"There's no way we're all sleeping like this." Said Minegishi as they shrugged Ryou head off of their shoulder. There wasn't any way they were all going to fit comfortably in here. They kind of wished that Shibata had come along, at least if he had been there then there would have been no way to fit everyone in this room and Mob could have maybe abandoned this 'let's all rest our heads at this random inn' plan. Then maybe Minegishi could have been sitting up all night in their own room questioning every decision that they had ever made in their life which had led them to this place.

"Please? I want us all to be together." Said Mob, turning to face Minegishi…who was sitting near Shimazaki…and now they were both together, and now she had to think about…she tried to think about something else, anything else, but it was hard to think about something else when the something that you were thinking about had just happened and-

"We're in the middle of nowhere, it's not like we have anywhere we can run away to. Besides, Hatori's scared of the dark." Said Sho, nudging Big Sis's aura with his. Something was up with her…probably the fact that she looked like she had been in the fight of her life. She was in the pajamas the inn gave them but before her clothes had been all dirty and ripped up, which he knew she never would have let happen if she could have avoided it. She wasn't super hurt, not hurt enough that they had to go running to Fukuda, but she'd still taken damage…which wasn't right.

Nothing should have been able to hurt Big Sis.

"I'm not afraid of the dark!" said Hatori, pulling the blanket off of his head. Sho was shooting him a smug look. He didn't know if he should have been annoyed or happy that Sho was treating him more like a brother.

"Uh-huh, then why do you sleep with the lights on?" asked Sho

"Because I fall asleep like that sometimes, that's all." Said Hatori

"That's really bad for you…but if you want to sleep with the lights on then we can. If it makes you feel better." said Mob. She didn't want to make Hatori feel bad, he was her friend after all, even if Dad had decided that he'd rather have Hatori as a son than Sho…and probably would have wanted to have Hatori as a daughter, too, if he had been a girl…but that was ok. She didn't need her parents, she had her friends, and Hatori had been a good friend to her for years. Even when she had been little and kind of weirdly in love with him.

She was kind of happy that it hadn't gone anywhere, if Dad had adopted him after they had been a couple then it would have been weird, and even if Dad hadn't she knew how weird it was to still be friends with someone after…

She looked down at her socks. They had holes in them.

"I don't mind if Miss Suzuki doesn't mind." Said Serizawa as he sat down beside her. He had been waiting for her to pick a spot. Anywhere she picked was fine. Anything she wanted was fine. Just so long as she was fine then he…he was fine. She would keep him safe and he would keep her safe…and not leave her.

He would never, ever, forgive himself for almost leaving her.

"It makes no difference to me either way." Said Shimazaki before he flopped down onto the ground beside Toshi, since they weren't going to let him use them as a pillow this was the next best thing. He wasn't the biggest fan of sharing a room with everyone but he could deal with it. Mob's aura was kind of…clingy, yeah, that was the word for it. It sounded kind of like a baby bird did when it's mother was gone, all chirpy and needy. Shimazaki didn't blame her, even he hadn't been all the way alright after he'd faced that spirit…hell, maybe he still wasn't all the way alright now. Well, that was what his dog was for…

Though since kilometers separated him from his emotional support dog his emotional support Toshi would have to do.

"I don't mind if nobody else minds." Said Mob as Serizawa sat down beside her. She took his hand in hers, and his aura in hers, and…and things felt like they were going to be ok. He was there, he wanted to be there, even after knowing how horrible she had been. Without her powers she was nothing, without her powers she wouldn't had had him or…or anyone, but she did have him and everyone else, too, so she should have been ok.

Why couldn't she just be ok?

"I don't mind if-" said Serizawa

"I hope none of you mind but I'm going to go take a bath." Said Minegishi as they got up. They knew where this was going and they weren't up to listening to it. They needed a long soak. It wasn't a hot springs, if only it had been, but there was an attached bathhouse and they needed a good, long, soak. It was better than sitting there and listening to Mob and Serizawa go back and forth over who minded the least.

It was obviously Serizawa.

Mob looked like she minded a lot. She wasn't ok. Minegishi didn't have to be a Mob whisperer to know that something wasn't right with her. Her aura, her face, her body language…yeah, no, sometime had happened. Probably something relating to the incredibly, idiotically, suicidally stupid thing that she'd gotten it into her head to-

-they needed a drink.

"Come on, Mob, you too. You look like you need it more than I do." Said Minegishi as they got up. They heard Ryuo whining. Well he could whine. He didn't need them like she needed them, whiney and needy as he was. Not that they were going to tell him that he was needy again, no, they had enough on their plate with Mob.

Though he was, at least, a lot easier to deal with.

"Coming!" said Mob before practically jumping to her feet. Being alone with Minegishi wasn't going to be that bad, right? Not so long as she didn't think about how she had betrayed them…how she was always betraying the people who loved her. Actually, really, when she thought about it what she had done to Minegishi was even worse than what she had done to Minori.

Minegishi was her friend for real, after all.

She followed Minegishi out of the room and down the hall to the where the girl's baths were. It would have been more fair to them if there had just been a bath for everyone. They would have been a lot happier. Or maybe if there had just been a bath for them since they didn't much like sharing either way. Mob wished that she could have done that for them, just to make something easier for them, just to make it up to them a little bit…actually, she could have.

She had that kind of power, didn't she?

"When we get home I can make a bathhouse just for you, if you want." Said Mob as they hung their clothes up. Minegishi shrugged.

"As much as I'd love to see you waste Claw resources on a personal bathhouse for me I'm going to have to decline since we have bathtubs at home." Said Minegishi as they hung their clothes up. They could feel Mob staring at them, which shouldn't have bothered them considering the fact that they were anatomically the same, but a lot of things in life shouldn't have bothered them…sometimes it felt like life had actually been engineered to bother them as much as possible.

They knew how to deal with that. Badly.

"I know that we do but I also just…know that you don't like to share things." Said Mob as Minegishi took their pants off the hook and looked around in the pockets.

"On the list of things that bother me in this world sharing a bath with you isn't that high up there." Said Minegishi as they shook their old mint tin and heard a familiar metal clanking.

"But it's up there, right?" asked Mob as Minegishi popped their mint's tin opened and pulled out something rectangular. Something that Mob knew wasn't a mint. She remembered those, they made you sleepy and hungry, but they also helped you forget what was bothering you. What was on your mind. What made you feel like you wanted to run away but also into the arms of the people that cared about you most even though they only cared about you because of something that you had no control over.

"Not as high as pretty much everything you've put me through up to this point." Said Minegishi as they dry swallowed a bar. Not exactly fun but it got the job done. They were too pissed off right now to deal with Mob, they were liable to say something that they were going to end up regretting, so maybe it was best to relax so sweet oblivion could take them. Then in the morning they could look at this with some distance and, finally, maybe even figure out the magical combination of words that would make Mob listen to them for once in her life.

"Can I have one of those?" asked Mob reaching for the tin. Minegishi quickly stuffed it back into their pants pocket and hung their pants back up on the hook.

"Case and point." Said Minegishi

"I'm sorry, I just…don't feel good right now." said Mob

"None of us feel good right now, Mob. We went running across the country in the middle of the night because you decided to go and do something suicidally stupid again, something that we all told you was a bad idea, something that could have gotten you killed or worse. You don't feel any worse right now than I do or your brother does or Ryou or Hatori or anyone else that's involved in this except maybe Serizawa but he just mindlessly goes along with whatever you want anyway so he doesn't count." Said Minegishi

"But-" said Mob

"Now I'm going to go take a bath. You're welcome to join me, you look like you need it, but if you just want to pop pills and forget about life hang out with Ryou then." Said Minegishi as they turned away from her. They had been way too harsh, they knew it for a fact, but maybe Mob needed harsh right now…or maybe they had just been selfishly trying to get all of this shit off of their chest without any thought to how she felt.

When in the hell was this going to kick in already?

"I don't want that!" said Mob as she quickly joined them, and even beat them, to place where you scrubbed down before you got in the water. She didn't want to be around Shimazaki, not after it felt like she had just been with him, not until she could make herself forget what she had done. She had been so terrible that she could even feel it on her skin.

And it didn't want to wash off.

She scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed but the gross, terrible, feeling wouldn't go away. No matter how much she scrubbed she could still feel him kissing her, touching her, and worst of all she could still feel herself….feel how much she liked it. How much she had wanted it to happen…how she shouldn't have wanted that. Not with her best friend's boyfriend even if he had said that he wanted to do that with her…and she certainly shouldn't have done it again!

Maybe she was just a terrible person. That didn't seem like the kind of thing that was supposed to wash off, otherwise being a good person would have been a lot easier.

"Come on, you're clean enough." Said Minegishi before they rinsed off. The wished that they had felt the filth of the day washing off with the overly perfumed soap. It didn't. It clung to them. Or maybe that was just shame. Not an emotion they enjoyed cultivating but one that they knew they needed to feel. They weren't Ryou after all, they felt shame and remorse when they had done something wrong, and they had really fucked up back there.

Mob needed them. Even if she had fucked up first, because she had fucked up first, she still needed them.

"Ok…I guess." said Mob as she rinsed off and followed them to the water. She wanted to be alone but she needed to be with them. She had spent so much time alone already…alone but not alone. Her eyes darted to all the corners in the room. No spiders spinning webs. She looked down at the floor. No ants running along by her feet. She glanced out the big windows. Just the colorful darkness of the night, no big black birds watching her with their beady little eyes…

She hadn't been alone in…she didn't even know how long…but she couldn't be alone. Not now.

It wouldn't have done her any good.

"This'll do me some good." muttered Minegishi as they lowered themselves into the water. More room than a bathtub and the water was hotter, too. They could feel themselves unwinding. It didn't wash away the shame of what they had done, how they had spoken to Mob, but it really did help. Or maybe that was just the bar kicking in. It had been a while since they'd needed one, their tolerance should have been a lot lower….

Their tolerance for themselves however, the example they had set, wasn't nearly low enough to let them forgive themselves for this.

"Maybe for me, too." said Mob as she settled into the water. Maybe it would do her some good too. She had taken baths before but never this warm. Things had never felt warm in the other world….the world of her dream. Things had never felt real. Compared to this, of course, back in the world everything had been real but also not and…and…

She sank lower into the water. She was here and this was real. That was what mattered.

"Is it?" asked Minegishi as they closed their eyes. They could still feel Mob, there, her body making little ripples in the water around them and their aura making ripples against theirs. Small and closed in, sort of, probably feeling what she should have felt…Minegishi was an asshole…but still! Mob had fucked up and…and she was just a kid. They were supposed to fuck up, weren't they? Minegishi wasn't sure.

They had fucked plenty of things in their life up but they had never really been a kid, either.

"I don't know. It's nice, though, warm." Said Mob

"It had better be. Who the hell wants to take a cold bath?" asked Minegishi

"I know. Cold baths are the worst. They were always cold in…I think it was a dream." Said Mob

"What was?" asked Minegishi, opening their eyes. Mob was sitting with her knees drawn to her chest. Whether out of modesty or just the desire to feel small Minegishi didn't know.

"The spirit. It…he, he used to be a boy before he died, tried to take over my body but I think that I was too strong for him so he kind of put me to sleep and…and I dreamt a lot of things." Said Mob softly.

"What…what kind of things?" asked Minegishi. They had been possessed before, briefly, and it wasn't a good feeling. Having to fight for control over your own body. She didn't need to feel like that…sure, she had gone and-no, she was just a kid. No kid should have had to go through that.

"Just like…I don't know. Stuff that I wanted but a bad version of it. Like I lived in the Castle with Mom again but Sho wasn't there and…and everyone else was just dolls…probably because I treat people like dolls-" said Mob as small whirlpools formed around her.

"You're thirteen, I haven't seen you play with dolls in years." Said Minegishi, cutting Mob off before she could break down or lose control.

"I know that I haven't in this world but in that world I did because…because I was alone all the time. Even with Mom around I was alone because…because she kind of didn't like me…but that's not that different from this world either. I mean Mom left me because she didn't want me anymore and…and since I was so bad she left Sho too…it's all my fault…" said Mob as she let her head hang low. Her bangs were in her eyes. She needed to cut them. She didn't care, it didn't matter.

"Your mother is a grown woman, Mob, she made her own choices. She chose to leave just like she chose to have you and Sho and, amazingly enough, she chose to marry your dad. Actually if anything he probably drove her away." Said Minegishi as they scooted closer to her. Not really their first choice, the bath was not the time to be in such close proximity to anyone, but Mob…that thing had done a number on Mob…her parents had done a number on her…

Minegishi may not have stood a chance against Suzuki, they were smart enough not to try, but as for that mother of Mob's…that woman was damn lucky Minegishi didn't have the faintest idea where she was.

"Dad loved her, though, and anyway he wasn't even around for long enough to drive her away. I was the person who was always around and I was the person she was always mad at. She was always happy when it was just her and Sho and Fukuda-" said Mob

"Well there you go, I can't imagine anyone being happy with that chewed piece of sugar free gum around." said Minegishi

"But you said that sugar is poison." Said Mob, looking up at Minegishi. They had gotten closer to her. She scooted away and gave them some space. No sense in ruining their bath like she had ruined everything else.

"Sugar is poison but sugar free gum is a punishment, much like having to be around Fukuda." Said Minegishi

"He wasn't always that bad. He used to be really nice when I was little but then Mom left and he spent more time with me and…and he started not to like me and I started to really not like him. He wasn't even in my dream, that's how much I don't like him, and I know that I'm really not supposed to dislike anyone-" said Mob

"You can dislike whoever you want to dislike, and Fukuda is definitely someone you should dislike. Mob, you didn't do anything to him. Maybe being attached at the hip to your Dad for the better part of three decades drove him to becoming the person he is now or maybe he was just always an asshole and that's what attracted your dad to him. Either way he'd a grown man, you didn't make him the way he is, and you're better off without him in your life or your dreams or…or whatever." Said Minegishi

"But Dad…Dad doesn't like me either, in the dream or in life he didn't like me. He even said that he-" said Mob

"Hated the person you were becoming, I know. You told me, and you know what? Suzuki isn't in any position to be throwing stones." Said Minegishi

"What…what do you mean?" asked Mob as she brushed her bangs out of her eyes. Minegishi had called Dad by his name and…and right, that was Dad's name, and she shouldn't have felt so weird hearing it. Maybe because she had been 'Suzuki' for…well, in this world she had been a Suzuki since the day she had been born but in that world, the dream world, everyone had always been calling her that. Reminding her of it…

Her name was Suzuki Shigeko. It shouldn't have felt weird…but it did.

"The man drinks ketchup, Mob, among other things. Some of which I don't think I should tell you about. You know about the traitor holes but, yeah, there's a lot of shit going on that I don't even like knowing about. Things that your Dad is personally responsible for. He has no room to be telling you that you're a terrible person when he, by all accounts, should have been exe-should have been locked up years ago." Said Minegishi, brushing Mob's hair out of her face. They had almost gone too far. Yes, Suzuki had committed so many crimes by this point that he should have been up for execution, but Mob didn't need to know that.

For some reason she still loved that ketchup drinking maniac.

"Dad doesn't drink ketchup that often…only when he's out of bread." Said Mob, smiling a little. She had forgotten that part. The spirit had been so busy showing her what was bad that it had skipped the funny parts. Like how Dad loved ketchup bread, and how he practically lived on eggs, and how he sometimes pretended that he was in the middle of very serious work when he was really playing Minecraft…

Dad was terrible, yes, but he was also kind of funny…and maybe the terrible outweighed the funny…but maybe then if the terrible outweighed the funny then his terrible outweighed Mob's terrible, too….though Mob was terrible in so many other different ways so maybe there wasn't room to compare.

"Either way it's still a crime against food, and adding that to his already lengthy list of crimes, that's a hell of a lot of crimes, Mob. More than I think you've ever committed in your life." said Minegishi

"I know that…that Dad's terrible outweighs my terrible but…but I'm still terrible. I did…I did a lot of bad things to the people I love, especially you." said Mob, looking away from them and not just because they were naked and they didn't like people looking at them naked. Minegishi took a deep breath. She braced herself, maybe now they were finally going to yell at her like she deserved.

"Mob…no. We are not talking about that again. We agreed to never speak of that again." Said Minegishi through clenched teeth. Nope. Not happening. They were not rehashing what had been thoroughly hashed out before. Mob had slept with Ryou, Ryou had slept with Mob, words had been had and now they were all just going to have to move on with their lives. They had forgiven Mob and begun the much longer and more arduous process of forgiving Ryou. Maybe at some point, too, they could forgive themselves.

But there was no way in hell that was going to happen if Mob kept bringing it up every ten seconds.

"But…but I did it again!" said Mob. The water seemed to freeze. The air seemed to seemed. She seemed to freeze…mostly because of Minegishi. It made no sense, they had plant powers, not ice powers…but right now they were giving her a look that could have frozen her solid.

"…what did you just say to me?" asked Minegishi through clenched teeth. She was going to…no, Ryou was going to die. His death would not be a swift one, no, his death would be one long and drawn out. It would involve thorns and spikes and possibly having his dick boiled in oil. Once…once they could forgive. He was a moron. Twice…twice….

They were going to make sure there was no thrice.

"I did it again! I didn't mean to but I did and…and-" said Mob. Minegishi hated her for sure now. She knew that she deserved it, and anything else that they felt right now, but that didn't mean that she wanted it. She wished that it could have just been another bath, not that they normally took baths together, so maybe this was what normal was going to be and-and-and that was ok! She didn't care if every bath that they took was together from now on, and Minegishi hated her until one of them died and passed on, so long as they could still be together.

She was never going to leave Minegishi, or any of her other friends, no matter how they felt about her.

"You…let me get this straight, Suzuki, you-" said Minegishi

"Please don't call me Suzuki." Said Mob quietly.

"Fine. Mob. Let me get this straight, you slept with Ryou again at some point and…and I don't even know what else there is to say. You slept with Ryou, Ryou slept with you, you-I don't even know what to say to you." said Minegishi as they tried to wrap their mind around a word Mob had just told them. Mob had…this wasn't about Mob. Ryou was twenty years old than her, he knew what he was doing, and he knew what this would have done to them. He had lied to them, blatantly, and…and they had believed every word that had come out of his mouth.

They had trusted him. That had been a mistake.

"No, not Shimazaki! I would never do that you again. I slept with Teru again." Said Mob. She braced herself for more yelling. None came. Minegishi was just looking at her. She looked back. It was kind of weird but she didn't care, not so long as there wasn't any more yelling. She would have taken the yelling above them hating her but that didn't mean that she liked being yelled at even if she deserved it.

"…ok." Said Minegishi. They sank down into the water. Any anger they had been feeling fled, leaving them with an overwhelming feeling of just…tiredness. Exhaustion. It felt like they had just done a day with Mob at Disneyland on the hottest, busiest, day of the year…and they'd done all the rides, too, not just the good ones.

Just sheer, bone breaking, mind melting, exhaustion.

"Ok?" asked Mob

"Yeah, ok." Said Minegishi

"But I-" said Mob

"Mob, I'm very tired. Whether it's from the Xanax doing it's job or dealing with you…what you did, it doesn't matter. You didn't sleep with Ryou again, that's what matters, and even if you had it would have been him I'd have been mad at…should have been mad at. I don't know why you think I'd care about you sleeping with that blond kid again, aside from the fact that you're thirteen years old and you don't have any business sleeping with anyone, but…ok. Fine. I can't watch you twenty four hours a day. If I can't stop you from risking your life on something suicidally stupid then I can't stop you from sleeping with that kid." Said Minegishi as they sank further into the tub. They were ready to admit it, they had completely lost control over the situation…that is if they had ever been in control to begin with.

"I don't want you to stop me. I guess I just want…I don't know. For you to be mad at me? I mean I did it again, I slept with my best friend's boyfriend, only what I did to you was even worse because it happened in real life and also you actually like me. Minori doesn't like me at all even if she acts like she does. She only wanted to be my friend because-" said Mob

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, Minori is a sad little girl. Let's back up to the 'sleeping with your best friend's boyfriend' thing." Said Minegishi, sitting up. They had no idea what had happened but things were starting to come together…and she had no idea what she had gotten into, had she? Matsuo had explained it before, what made this spirit so dangerously. It could lock you into yourself while it squeezed you like a grape and your lifeforce was the wine. That is if it didn't just wear you like a meatsuit. Mob…the latter would have been bad but the former…

Was not something Minegishi wanted to think about.

"Ok. That's what I did. Teru was Minori's boyfriend in that world and I slept with him and…and I knew it was wrong when I was doing it but I still did it. I still did it because I wanted to do it…because I wanted someone to love me, I guess, because nobody loves me." said Mob

"Come off it. I love you. You really upset me sometimes but that doesn't mean that I don't love you. Stop it." said Minegishi, racking their hands through their hair.

"I know that you love me but you don't love me like that…actually it would be really weird if you did." Said Mob

"And it's not weird if Ryou does?" asked Minegishi. As soon as they said it they instantly wished that they could take it back. That was not a question that they needed an answer to. Ryou was…less than normal. Also more than needy. Or maybe greedy was a better word for him. When he decided that he wanted or needed something he just took it. He took and he took and he took until he'd long past the point of satiation. It might have had something to do with how often he'd been starved as a child for just about everything...though it wasn't an excuse.

Minegishi had been just as hungry as he'd been but they'd never dreamed of crossing the lines that he'd crossed.

"Oh no, it is, I mean it was…but I just kind of went along with it because…I don't know. I'm selfish, I guess. I just wanted someone to love me and also I really like…well I think that I really like…can we talk about Teru again? This is getting kind of weird." Said Mob

"Mob, we passed that point a long time ago." Said Minegishi, shaking their head.

"Ok…but still, it's weird and…and the whole thing is weird and it makes me feel bad, too. Like I did something wrong and…and I did but I didn't, because it was a dream, but I thought that it was real and…and if I did it again in a dream does that mean that I'll do it again in real life?" asked Mob. She waited for Minegishi to say something, anything, good or bad…but they didn't. They just looked at her, they looked her right in the eyes, like it was some kind of staring contest.

Mob decided to let them win.

"Only you know what you're going to do." Said Minegishi, looking away. Mob was…Mob. She could and would do whatever she wanted. It wasn't like Minegishi would have been able to physically stop her. She was like a force of nature, like standing on the shore and try to tell a tsunami to back off, and Minegishi…was just themselves.

They didn't stand a chance against Mob and they never would.

"What do you mean?" asked Mob

"I mean that I have no idea what it is that you're planning on doing, alright? I told you not to come here, there, you know what I mean! I told you not to try and fight that thing and what did you do? You risked your life, again. You disappeared, again. You slept with…you know what, dreams don't count and whatever that spirit showed you wasn't real. If you're considering sleeping with Ryou again because of it…I don't know! There's nothing that I can do to stop you but know this, Mob, I am not ok with-" said Minegishi

"No! I would never! I just meant that…I'm not planning on ever doing that again. It made you mad at me and it made things really weird and…and I don't want that." Said Mob

"So what are you getting yourself so upset over, then?" asked Minegishi

"I'm upset because I did it again and…and I promised myself that I would never do anything like that again but I still did it…I'm worried that I'm terrible." Said Mob. She drew her knees up to her chest and watched the water. There were ripples, little ones, surrounding her. Every time she moved more were born. If she stayed still then they'd stop.

She stayed still.

They didn't stop.

A hand was on her shoulder. She looked up. Minegishi looked…she couldn't tell. Not mad, no, at this point she could tell when they were mad. Maybe tired. That would have made sense. Or maybe sad…maybe they had caught Mob's sadness. But then why were they still there? They could have left. The thought of them leaving made her feel so terrible…worse than she had ever felt before. The people she loved had left her before but…but the thought of Minegishi leaving her was worse than when Mom left, when Dad said he didn't like her anymore, when Fukuda stopped being her friend, and all the times Sho had ever hit her put together.

But Minegishi didn't leave.

"Mob, if we weren't in the bath right now I'd hug you, but we are so this is all you're getting. Alright?" said Minegishi. Again they had gotten too wrapped up in their own shit. Mob was just a kid. She didn't know what she was doing and…and yeah, she had fucked up, but Minegishi just had to keep on reminding her that they were there for her no matter what.

And there was been a lot of 'what' happening lately. Too much 'what', in their opinion.

"Whatever that…that parasite showed you, it wasn't real. You know that spirits leech energy from the living. That thing was trying to drain you, and probably break down your defenses, and…and you're alive so I'm guessing you won…anyway, it doesn't matter what happened. It was all just a dream, ok? You're not a terrible person and you're not going to sleep with Ryou again…and we are not talking about this anymore, alright? It's done. It happened, it's over, and we're all moving on with our lives. Got it?" asked Minegishi

"Yes, but-" said Mob

"No 'buts'. It's over. I don't care who you sleep with after this, that blond kid or whoever else, and I don't care if they're attached or single or whatever. I don't like you having that part to your life but since you're pretty committed to making all of my mistakes, yeah, go ahead and make them then. Just know that I'll always be here for you. I might not always be happy with you but I'll always be here." Said Minegishi. Mob looked at them like they were the answer to all of her hopes and dreams. They shifted away self-consciously. If Mob noticed, which they doubted, she said nothing.

She just kept on staring at them…and those may have been tears in her eyes.

"Minegishi…when we're done in here can I hug you?" asked Mob. She had needed to hear that. She felt so much warmer and lighter and just…better. Minegishi had always been able to make her feel better, they were her best friend after all. Her for real best friend, not a fake best friend like Minori had been. They had always been there for her and she for them.

She couldn't have asked for a better best friend than Minegishi.

"When we're done." Said Minegishi as they scooted back to their side of the tub. The next time they had a heart to heart it was going to be literally anywhere else than a bathhouse.

"Ok." Said Mob as Minegishi scooted away. She waited until they were both done and dressed in the pajamas the inn gave them before Mob got her hug. It was the best hug that she could ever remember getting. It felt like a million years since the last time she had been hugged. Probably because she had spent-

-she had no idea how long it had been.

Outside of the dream it had only been a few hours but inside the dream it was a whole other thing. Time had just…passed her by. One day was like the one before it, all grey and sad. She hadn't gotten any older, thankfully, but time had still passed…but it didn't matter. Time only mattered in the real world, not the dream world, and in fact it was like Minegishi had said. Nothing mattered in the dream world.

She just had to keep on telling herself that. So she did.

She told herself that, in her head, with every step she took back to her room…back to her friends. Her friends that she hadn't seen in so long. She couldn't wait to get back home, to be with everyone else. Shibata and Tsuchiya and Mukai…maybe even Dad, possibly, if he ever came back…or maybe she could go to him and…and Shiori, who wasn't that bad, mainly because she had been kidnapped and you couldn't dislike a person that had been kidnapped. She couldn't have been any worse than Mom.

No, Mob never wanted to see Mom again.

Maybe she should have just been grateful for the friends that she had with her now…all two of them. She only found Hatori and Serizawa in the room when she got back. They were both playing something on their Gameboys, judging by how little yelling Hatori was doing he was probably winning. Shimazaki was gone, which was good, and Sho…well that wasn't so good.

She needed her little brother. She couldn't be a big sister without a little brother.

"Have you guys seen Sho?" asked Mob. She tried looking with her aura, briefly, but all she could tell was that Sho was near…she was out of practice. Her brain thought that she had spent more time in the dream world than had actually passed, it seemed.

"He went to look for monkeys." Said Hatori as he got back to kicking Serizawa's ass. Partially for the love of winning and partially because, as a friend and adopted brother, he couldn't exactly tell Mob what he thought of her crazy plan that everyone told her was a bad idea and that Suzuki was probably going to be pissed at him for letting her do.

"There are monkeys here?" asked Mob. She had thought that they only lived in hot springs.

"Don't they live in all inns?" asked Serizawa as he let Hatori win. He didn't care if he won or lost, he just liked having someone to play with. Maybe he should have gotten on with the losing part, though. Miss Suzuki was back and she might have wanted to spend more time with him…not that he assumed! She had just been kind of…wanting to spend a lot of time with him since what had happened. Not that he knew why.

He knew that she had forgiven him for the whole thing where he almost ran away but he knew that he didn't deserve it. She was just really nice that way, nice in a way that he would never deserve.

"I thought that it was just hot springs." Said Mob

"There aren't a lot of monkeys around here, not during this time of year anyway. He'd have had better luck in the monkey park." Said Minegishi as they rolled over and faced the wall.

"Oh…oh no. I'm going to and look for him. It's not safe out in the woods at night." Said Mob. She hadn't killed that spirit, it was still out there, and Sho was so little…and also it was the woods at night. Something could have eaten him or he could have gotten lost or frozen to death or eaten the wrong plant or-or-or-

She had to save him.

"I'll go with you." said Serizawa as he got up. Miss Suzuki shook her head.

"It's alright, Shos' my brother, I can find him on my own." Said Mob. She loved Serizawa but she didn't really love the idea of walking through the trees with him in the dark…but it was still nice that he wanted to go with her. He really cared about her a lot, didn't he?

And she cared about him a lot, too.

"I'll be back soon, probably, you can keep on playing with Hatori…but quietly. Minegishi's tired." Said Mob. Minegishi was actually snoring a little bit, and doing that thing where they shook their head in their sleep. Minegishi didn't always have good dreams, they had said before, but Mob hoped that this was one of those times when they dreamt well. When they got everything they wanted in their dreams.

Either that or she hoped that they didn't dream at all.

That was what Mob wanted for herself. She hoped that she never, ever, dreamt of anything else ever again. Certainly not any bad dreams but…but maybe not any good ones either. Dreams ended, after all, and she didn't want to get stuck in a good dream and have it end. She didn't know what could have been better than this, anyway, being on vacation with her friends just like old times. Back when they had always been travelling from country to country, Claw house to Claw house, just….being friends. Sure, the plane rides hadn't always gone well, doubly so if Fukuda had been around, but it had still mostly been good times.

She didn't know what she would have done if she woke up and this all turned out to be the dream.

Even the parts she didn't like, like her sort of fight with Minegishi, or even this. Running into the last person that she had wanted to run into. She had been following Sho's aura out the door and to the tree line. She had known that Shimazaki was near but she hadn't been planning on walking right up to him, actually she had thought that she had been avoiding him…

But there he was.

"Mob, hey. Want some?" asked Shimazaki as he held his pen out towards her. She hesitated before she took it…not a good sign. She had been weird all night, especially towards him. He didn't know what he had done to her, he never knew what he did, but he knew what might have happened to her…what had probably happened to her.

There was a reason everyone had told her not to fuck with that thing.

"Um…thanks, I guess." said Mob as she took the pen from him. She didn't want to be around him but she did need this. She remembered what Minegishi had said, if she wanted to get high with someone it needed to be Shimazaki, and she did…she really did.

She just needed to shut her brain off for a little bit, that was all.

"You can have as much of that as you want, I've got others." Said Shimazaki as he patted his coat pocket. He felt Mob smile, heard it in her aura too, but not as much as usual. Sometimes was still troubling her. That wasn't going to work out for either of them. Troubled Mob was boring Mob after all, and Mob was many things but never dull.

"Thank you. I needed this a lot." Said Mob

"Yeah, I know. It got you too, didn't it?" asked Shimazaki. Mob exhaled and nodded.

"Yeah…it did. Did it make you…make you see things? I mean experience them?" asked Mob. She didn't even want to think about what it could have done to Shimazaki. She knew that her parents weren't nice, and that Mom had probably hated her, but at least Mom had never left her in a room to starve or dropped her off in the woods to die.

"It did…lots of fucked up shit. You?" asked Shimazaki. He wasn't going to go into details. Mob didn't need them, she had enough going on as it was. He knew that his life had been pretty fucked up but it wasn't nearly as bad as hers. At least his father hadn't ever pretended to be anything other than what he was and at least he'd had a mom to love him. Not like Mob.

"The…the same, I guess, I mean it made a whole world for me and…and I did some things that I'm kind of mad at myself for." Said Mob before she took another hit. At least she remembered how to do this. She may have forgotten just how good it felt but she wasn't coughing nearly as much as she had when she started. It was so nice of Shimazaki to share with her. He had always been so nice to her. It was nice that they were still friends.

Just friends. That was all that she was ever going to let them be.

"What, did you finally snap and kill your dad or something?" asked Shimazaki

"No, nothing like that. I just…did something really bad with my best friend's boyfriend and then she hated me but it was just a dream so it didn't matter. Minegishi said so." Said Mob quickly. She didn't want to think about it so she wouldn't. She would think about…she wiggled her feet in her shoes. There was a seam in her socks right at her toes…it felt weird.

So she kept on feeling it.

"Fuck…again? I mean, alright, there was kind of a breakdown in communication there but it wasn't that bad, right? I mean, come on, we at least had fun together." asked Shimazaki. He now knew how Hatori felt after that one Christmas party they'd had years ago. How it felt to be haunted by one fuck up for the rest of your life. It kind of sucked, kind of really sucked, kind of soul suckingly sucked.

"You and…oh! You think that I'm talking about you and me. It was me and Teru, he was Minori's boyfriend, and it's all really complicated but it was all a dream, too, so we really don't have to talk about it. I'm never going to do it again in life and…and that's what matters." Said Mob

"So that's what you've been so weird about. I mean I have no idea why it's such a big thing but I get it, I guess. I mean that I respect it." Said Shimazaki

"It's a big deal because we're still friends and I see you all the time and we did…all the things…and I also see Minegishi all the time and you love them and they love you and I messed with that…and I did the same thing in the dream world…the same terrible thing…" said Mob

"Mob, come on, you're beating yourself up over nothing. Really, Toshi's right about dreams not being anything, but still. If someone wants to fuck you and you want to fuck them then fuck away." Said Shimazaki with a wave of his hand.

"It's…it's not that simple." Said Mob

"It is, you're just overthinking it. I was into you, you were into me…or at least you wanted to fuck, so we did. A lot. You were pretty great, by the way, a little selfish but you're just starting out." Said Shimazaki

"Shimazaki…stop it. Don't talk about…about stuff like that." Said Mob. She felt herself blushing. She wanted to turn away from him but she knew that it wouldn't do her any good.

"Why not? We had a thing, now it's over, and there's no reason to be weird about it. I made my choice just like this dream guy of yours made his. Don't go killing yourself over other people's choices…actually don't go killing yourself at all. We may not be together anymore but you're still one of my best and only friends. You may not love me but I still love-" said Shimazaki

"Have you seen Sho?" asked Mob quickly. She knew what he was going to say and she knew that she didn't want to hear it. Not from him, not now, and maybe not every again. Him loving her had led her to making the worst choice that she had ever made in her life. It was like how he had just said, they had both made their choices, and she was the one who should have known better. Back then, back in her dreams, and…and…

And right now, too.

"Sho? Yeah, he said something about looking for monkeys. There's not a lot around here but I pointed him in the right direction…hope he doesn't get bitten, though. They aren't as friendly as they look." Said Shimazaki. Well that conversation was over. Mob wasn't as smooth as she thought she was, but whatever, at least things were going to be less weird between them so mission accomplished.

"You let him go into the woods on his own?" asked Mob

"He looked like he needed some 'Sho' time. You know how he gets when he's pissed off." said Shimazaki

"I do." Said Mob. When Sho was upset, really upset, those were the times when he needed the most love of all. She knew what he was going to say, when she caught up to him, he was going to tell her that he was alright and that he wanted to be out there on his own. But she wasn't going to leave him on his own, no. They weren't going to be apart ever again.

She wouldn't allow it.

She had power in this world. Her powers and the power that came with being Dad's daughter…so her power again. She was the boss of her household, not Mom, Mom had forfeited that when she abandoned them. Mob was the one who decided what happened and when and now, right now in the woods, she was deciding that she and Sho were never going to be apart ever again for as long as they were both going to live.

And Mukai, too, but she was back with her Mom so it didn't count for right now.

She found Sho pretty fast. She used her powers to carry herself so it wasn't like she'd had to walk. She found him deep in the woods sitting in a tree and watching…it took her a minute to see what it was that he was watching. From a distance it looked like he was watching the ground but as she got closer, and the moon got brighter, she could see tiny, fuzzy, beings.

She had never seen monkeys up close before.

She slowly flew over to the tree branch that Sho was sitting in. She held herself just above the branch, so it looked like she was sitting, but she didn't trust it to hold her weight. Fukuda wasn't around to put her back together if she fell after all. Her or Sho, and he was the one who really mattered. He was so small…how had she forgotten just how little her little brother was?

How could she have ever forgotten him at all?

"Sho-" said Mob. Sho shushed her and pointed to the monkeys.

"Don't wake them, if you do they'll run away." Whispered Sho as Big Sis sat down beside him. He didn't know what she was doing all the way out here. She was the one who'd been in a fight, he figured she would have been sleeping or whatever. He was the one who couldn't sleep. He hadn't been in a fight. He had just…just left her to fight. Left her to fight while he complained.

About dinner…about her leaving him…he was such an idiot, wasn't he?

"I've never seen monkeys up close before." Whispered Mob as she pulled a leaf out of Sho's hair. It was sticking up like usual…how could she have forgotten how his hair stuck up? She had never seen hair like his before aside from Dad's but Dad never let his get this long. It was kind of cool…she wished that she'd had hair like his and Dad's…

She wished for a lot of things, before, when she had been little enough to still think that wishing mattered.

"Me neither." Whispered Sho

"Do you think that they're a family?" asked Mob

"Maybe…or maybe they're just friends." Said Sho

"It's hard to tell, sometimes, what the difference is." Whispered Mob. Sometimes it felt like her friends were more like family than her actual family…and sometimes it felt like Sho was more of a friend than a little brother. Like now. She knew that she should have been telling him that it was his bedtime, and that he hadn't had a bath in a while, and probably that he needed to eat a vegetable and brush his hair and all that other stuff but she just…she didn't want to. She just wanted to be here, with him, hanging out.

So that was what she did.

"It is, sometimes, I guess." said Sho. It never really felt like she was a friend, at least it hadn't since Mom had left. When they had been little everything had been different, but they weren't little kids anymore. Mom had left and Dad had promoted Big Sis to 'Mom rank' and then everything just…changed. They loved each other but there was always this power she had. The power to tell him what to do, what to eat, when to go to bed…but also the power to…to leave.

The same power Mom had…the same power that she had used.

"I'm sorry!" said Sho suddenly, and maybe too loudly. The monkeys underneath them stirred.

"For what?" asked Mob

"For…for not noticing that you were gone, I mean I did notice but I thought that…that you'd left. So I didn't look for you." said Sho. Big Sis gasped.

"Like mom!" gasped Mob

"Um…kind of. But I know that you're not like her…and I shouldn't have thought that you were just because you ran away…left. We're home for dinner." said Sho. It had been stupid of him to think things like that, that she ever would have run away from home like Mom had. She wasn't Mom even though she acted like it. She was Big Sis. She was better a better Mom than Mom had ever been, he just should have been a better little brother.

A better little brother would have known that something was wrong.

"Sho! No, I would never do that to you! Do you hear me, little brother? I would never, ever, do that to you." said Mob. She knew that she had been talking way too loudly. All of the monkeys ran away…great. Something else that she had ruined.

"I know, ok!? It's like I know but…but I didn't know, then, when I was waiting for you to come home. When I was waiting for dinner…" said Sho

"I forgot to make dinner…" whispered Mob. Sho had been starving because of her. He could have starved to death alone and scared because of her…she was no kind of sister.

"Yeah, you did, but it doesn't matter. It shouldn't matter." Said Sho

"No, Sho, it does matter. It's always going to matter. You're here and you're real and I should have been there to take care of you. I'm not Mom and…and I shouldn't have acted like her." said Mob softly. He was so little. Even if this was the part of the year when they were the same age he was always going to be a lot littler than her. He was always going to need him and she…

She was always supposed to be there for him.

"I don't care about dinner, I mean I did but…but I care about you, ok? I should have gone and looked for you, maybe if I had I could have been there and then I could have saved you." said Sho. Big Sis's aura got dark, there, dark and heavy. She was looking at him not just with her eyes but with her everything. Her aura reached out to his and held him in place. He knew that she loved him, that she never would have hurt him on purpose, but there was a part of him that wanted to run away.

She grabbed him by the hand. There went that idea.

"No." said Mob

"No, what?" asked Sho

"No, no, no! Don't…don't ever…Sho, if you had come with me then you'd have-have died! You would have died and it would have all been my fault because-because I did something dumb! I tried to save someone who didn't even like me and-and it shouldn't matter but it did and…and…and…and I don't know, ok?!" asked Mob. She never should have raised her voice to him. She was older, she was more powerful, and she was scaring him. She had just acted way too quickly, that was all. The thought of her little brother living through that kind of…not even horror, he liked horror, all of his favorite movies were horror movies. She never would have wanted him to live through that kind of suffering…that kind of harm. That kind of slow, daily suffering that could have just worn him down until there was nothing left of him at all…

And it would have been worse, so much worse, for him. Mom and Dad may not have loved her, and Mom hadn't been afraid to share it, but Sho…Mom had loved him just as much as Dad hated him…

She shuddered to think of what kind of dreamworld the spirit would have come up for him.

"No! I'm your brother and I'm supposed to protect you! I should have been there for you or just, just should have known that something was wrong, ok? I fucked up, not you, and…and don't try and lie to me! I am sick of everyone lying to me and I am sick of everyone making me lie…I don't want to lie to you." said Sho as he pulled his hand away. He brought his knees up around his chest, the tree branch under him groaning under his weight. He could have made himself fly if he'd wanted to but he just…didn't want to. If he fell then he fell.

If he fell then he deserved it. For everything that he had ever done to her.

"You don't lie to me…anymore, and anyway I know what you lied to me in the first place. You only lied to me because you had to, because you had to spend time with Mukai but you were afraid that I would tell Dad about how you were visiting her. I mean I wouldn't have. Not then and not now...never now." said Mob as she reached out with her powers and steadied Sho. He was about to fall. He didn't deserve to fall, the pain that would have come with it. She was his sister. She was supposed to make his life better, to make sure he didn't get hurt, to take all the pain away from him…

She'd done a pretty bad job of it over the years.

"I…I…" said Sho. He didn't want to lie to her anymore. Even though he knew that she couldn't know about what he and Fukuda were doing, how they were going to take Dad down. She would have told him, gone right to him, because that was just who she was. She was Dad's favorite, or at least she had been before Dad decided that Hatori was the greatest person ever to live or whatever.

"I mean…I don't know. Maybe back then when Dad loved me, for real not how he says he loves me now, I…I don't know. I was little then but…but I know what I would have done if you had told me now. I would have kept it to myself." Said Mob. She never should have been on her parents' side about anything. Mom…she never should have wanted Mom back and Dad…she had never been Dad's favorite. She hadn't been herself, she hadn't been 'Mob'. She had been 'Daughter' when he had been happy with her and 'Shigeko' when he hadn't been. She wasn't either of those people, though, she was Mob.

She may not have liked every single part of Mob but at least Mob was the person that she chose to be.

"But you love Dad." Said Sho

"I love you, little brother, and I would never tell Dad any of your secrets. Dad…Dad doesn't love me, he loves Daughter, and I never should have let him trick me into thinking that he loved me…and I never should have looked away when Dad was mean to you. I should have saved you, I should have been there for you, I should have rescued you. It was wrong of me and…and I hope that you can forgive me one day." Said Mob. Sho was looking at her, now. His eyes were shiny and he was sniffling a little…oh! She quickly held out her sleeve and wiped his eyes and nose like she used to when he had been little. She didn't care if she got snot on her pajamas. These weren't even her pajamas so it didn't matter. Pajamas didn't matter.

Being there for her little brother, the little brother who she had forgotten, mattered.

"I forgive you…I forgave you a long time ago." Said Sho quietly. He didn't now why he had been whispering, the monkeys had left a while ago. Maybe he was just afraid of her hearing him and believing him…for some reason. Or maybe he just didn't want to talk about this, about Dad, and about how things used to be between him and Dad. Because he wasn't a little kid anymore, he wasn't a kid at all anymore!

He wasn't that kid anymore.

"Ok...now all I have to do is forgive myself for how I was…and also get through to you about not coming after me when I do dangerous things. Ok? I love you and I don't want anything to happen to you." said Mob

"But…but I have to do dangerous stuff sometimes." Said Sho

"No, you don't. I'm the one who does dangerous things, ok? I'm older and I'm stronger and-" said Mob

"Yeah, but you're…you! You shouldn't have to do this! You shouldn't have had to go after that big, scary, evil…thing! You shouldn't have had to go after it and you…you shouldn't have to do this, either." Said Sho

"Sho, what are you talking about? Do what, sit in this tree in the cold and the dark?" asked Mob

"No, not this…well, yeah, if you're cold I guess. You want my coat?" asked Sho as he tried to pull off his coat. Big Sis shook her head and held him in place. He was starting to hate it when she did that, when she showed him just how much stronger than him she was.

"You keep it, you're cold. I don't want you to be cold, Sho. I don't want…I don't want anything to happen to you and I don't want you to…to keep things from me again." Said Mob. She wondered if this was how Minegishi felt when she went off and did dangerous things that they had told her not to do. They always told her that they'd handle things, them or someone else, even though Mob was the strongest esper every next to Dad. She could handle anything…most things. She could decide what she could and could not handle, especially when it came to Sho and…and whatever it was that he was trying to hide from her.

She could at least handle anything that Sho threw at her.

"Sometimes I have to keep shit from you, ok? For both of our own good." said Sho. He wasn't Fukuda, he didn't want anything bad to happen to her, and anyway even Fukuda thought that involving her was a bad idea. Either she went off and told Dad or she joined him and Dad hated her just as much as he hated Sho.

"Keep what from me?" asked Mob

"I can't tell you, ok? If I tell you then Dad…he'll either punish you or you'll turn on me to him. Either one fucks me over, ok? And I don't want to be fucked over so don't fuck me over." Said Sho. Big Sis took his face between her hands and pulled him in really close. Her aura formed a barrier around them, a glowing barrier, the kind that nearly turned night into Dad. It may have even been bright enough that normal people could have seen it. He didn't dare try to get way.

Where could he have gone that she couldn't have caught up to him?

"Sho. No. I would never do that. I would never f-word…I would never fuck you over." Said Mob. She wasn't letting go of him until hie believed her. She didn't care if it took all night, she didn't care if she froze to death, she didn't even care if they were eaten by monkeys. Sho needed to know that he could trust her, that whatever was happening to him he would always be able to trust her.

"You said fuck…" said Sho

"Because I'm serious. There's nothing that you could ever do that could make me betray you." said mob, pulling him even closer.

"But what if…" said Sho. He couldn't tell her. He couldn't trust her. Fukuda had said…Fukuda had said a lot of things over the years. Fukuda had always been there for him but…but that didn't mean that he was always right…he could be wrong and he had been wrong before…

Maybe he was wrong again.

"There's no 'what if', Sho, there is nothing that you can say or do to ever make me betray you." said Mob

"But what if I was…if I was betraying someone else." Said Sho softly. What he wanted to do was stand on top of this tree and start screaming, to tell her that he was betraying Dad, that he wasn't going to have a snowflake's chance in hell without her. That he needed her now more than he had ever needed her in their entire lives…but he couldn't. He could only whisper.

He knew that he was out in the middle of nowhere but he still felt like someone was listening.

"….it doesn't matter." Said Mob. She had no idea who he was betraying or why, a terrified part of her wondered if he was as much of a cheater…or cheating-adjacent person, as she was. If she had someone taught him that kind of behavior without even knowing. She…she couldn't help him with that but…but he was her little brother and…and she had to be there for him.

Always and in all ways.

"What if I was betraying…Dad." Said Sho. He whispered the last part so quietly that he wasn't even sure if he'd said anything at all. If she'd heard it. It took her a moment to hear him, it seemed, just a minute. Her aura burned brighter before getting dull. Her face was just the same as it ever was. She was still holding onto him, though, and he had no idea if that was a good thing or a bad thing. It was hard to tell with her…it had always been hard to tell with her.

"…how so?" asked Mib quietly. She couldn't feel him, he was still far away, and she couldn't feel Hatori either. She didn't have her phone on him but Sho did. Hatori might have been too busy to spy on them. He couldn't know about this, she knew him, he would just go running right to Dad. She couldn't have that. Not when Sho was involved in…

She had no idea what he was involved in.

"We don't know yet." Said Sho. She wasn't mad…or at least she wasn't showing it. She might have just been doing this whole 'conceal, don't feel' thing that she'd been doing for their entire lives. Maybe that was a good thing, too, since he was in the process of telling her that he was actively working against everything that she had devoted her life to…everything that Dad had ever devoted his life to…

The only reason that the two of them existed for.

"We? Who else knows?" asked Mob. Maybe Shimazaki, they weren't as close as they used to be but they were still pretty close. He didn't know how to keep his mouth shut about anything. She'd have to do something about that…not the sort of thing that Dad would have done but she had to do something. She had to do something before Sho got himself hurt.

She had to protect him.

"Fukuda and some guys he found." Said Sho

"So…so Fukuda put you up to this?" asked Mob. Fukuda, Fukuda, Fukuda! Why did it always come back to that-that-that jerk!?

"No he didn't." said Sho. He didn't know what came over him but part of him wanted to shove her out of the tree. He wasn't a kid anymore so he didn't. But he wanted to…because he sucked…and because she sucked too! How could she have thought that Fukuda had put him up to anything! What, did she think that he was too dumb to think to stop Dad? To see what kind of a person he was? Or maybe…maybe she was still loyal to him.

Maybe she had lied to him just like…just like Mom had.

"Don't protect him. He's not…he's not worth it." Said Mob. She felt the ground shake. A the sky came to life with birds. She may have hurt, if not killed, a tree…she could fix it later. Right now she had to fix this. She had to…she had to fix herself, the way she felt, before she flew home and asked Fukuda what exactly it was that he thought he was doing using Sho like this! Leading Sho down this path!

A path that he shouldn't have been going down in the first place. He was Dad's best friend after all and that meant something. It had to.

"He is too…well he's kind of an asshole but he didn't put me up to it. I put myself up to it." Said Sho

"Why? Sho…you're talking about treason. Traitor whole treason….or even worse!" said Mob

"I know. I don't care." Said Sho

"You don't…how do you not care?! Sho, this is serious. This isn't a game, you could…you could die! Dad doesn't let traitors live. We both know that and…and he doesn't…he doesn't like you that much already. Sho…this isn't…" said Mob. It wasn't right, it wasn't smart, it wasn't…it wasn't something that her little brother needed to be involved in. She didn't like to think about that part of Claw, the part that she knew Dad never should have let happen, the parts of Claw that her friends used to work in. Catching traitors, putting them in holes, getting rid of their bodies…the things that she could have fixed if only she had been in charge for real…if only she had been born a boy…

The things that Sho had the power to change, that he would have the power to change, as soon as Dad died.

"You think I don't know that?!" shouted Sho

"No, I don't think that you do. Sho, why not just wait? Wait until you're all grown up, wait until Dad dies, wait until…I don't know when it'll be but it'll happen. I don't think that Dad is going to have another boy, I read that older people have a lot of trouble having babies, so…so everything could be yours. When it's all yours then you'll be able to change whatever you want…fix whatever you want." Said Mob

"I can't wait that long and I can't gamble on Dad not having another boy…and he does have another boy, Hatori." Said Sho

"He's not our brother, not for real. He's a Hatori, not a Suzuki, and Dad was very clear that only a boy with Suzuki blood could succeed him. A boy like you…please, little brother, please just…think about this." Said Mob softly

"I have thought about it, Shigeko, I'm not stupid. I know that it's going to be dangerous but if Dad takes over the world then…then everything is going to be like Claw. He's going to hurt people, a lot of people, and he's not even going to care." Said Sho. That was the worst part in all of it. Dad didn't care who he hurt whether it was his friends, people who worked for him, or even his own kids…and Big Sis should have been better than that! She had told him that she was on his side and…and now she was changing her mind and…and…

And he was fucked…but that was ok.

He didn't mind. If he was fucked then he was fucked, and if he wasn't fucked then he wasn't fucked. It even felt sort of good, not having this secret hanging above his head. Not having to think about, to worry about, her finding out about him…her betraying him, her…maybe even siding with him…

She knew and that was enough to take what felt like the weight of the world he needed to save off of his shoulders.

"Don't call…don't say things like that. I know that Dad is going to hurt a lot of people and…and we can try and maybe stop him but…but it's just…" said Mob. It was going to be dangerous, dangerous in ways that made what she just went through look like a bad dream. Dangerous is ways that made her think that she…she could have lost her brother. Dangerous in ways that maybe would have pushed Dad to doing…to doing the one thing she had been afraid of him doing since she had been old enough to see him for what he was…

She couldn't let Sho go through with this.

"What then, you're just going to tell Dad about this? You're going to betray me, send me to a traitor hole, or maybe Dad'll just torture me again and-" said Sho

"You know I would never let that happen to you. Any of those things." Said Mob. She knew that Sho wasn't making things up, that was exactly what was going to happen to him, or even worse. She knew that she couldn't have just left her little brother to that fate. She knew that she needed…she needed to…she couldn't let him go through with this.

She couldn't let anything happen to him.

"Either you're going to tell on me or you're going to join me, Big Sis, so what's it going to be?" asked Sho. Her face stayed the same but her aura changed. It got dark, deeper, and then dimmer before it hardened into a barrier around them. Then it got brighter and brighter until he couldn't stand to have his aura out anymore. Then it went back to normal…and it just stayed like that.

For a good, long, time.

"I can't let you go through with this." Said Mob

"Fine then, whatev-" said Sho

"Without me." said Mob before she pulled him into the closest hug that she had ever given him before in their entire lives. She had lived her life without Sho already. She was never going to go through that again and if betraying Dad meant keeping him in her life then that was just the way that it was going to be. She had lived with just her parents, she knew what that life was, even if it didn't take place in some grey, alternate universe version of the castle. She knew what Dad was like and…and she knew that he had been plotting this for his entire life, since he had been her age, but things changed. Plans changed. She had changed.

And she didn't want to change back, not if it meant hurting Sho.

So she hugged him. She hugged him until he tried to get free and then she hugged him some more. She hugged him until he agreed to go back to their room, telling her the whole time about how more of his plans would make sense without as strong as her on his side. Someone that Dad would never have seen coming…and it was true. Dad may not have loved her anymore, or ever since he had mostly just loved 'Daughter', but that was…something that had to be ok.

She was going to have to betray Dad.

That was going to be the easy part. Betraying Dad meant betraying Claw and betraying Claw meant betraying her friends. They had joined because they had wanted to follow Dad and…and she didn't know if she could even put them in this kind of danger, the kind that would have come from following her…but she had to. She crept into their room, stepping over everyone until she got to her futon, with each step wondering what she was going to do with them.

Wondering who would be on her side.

Minegishi was her best friend but also they just wanted to live a peaceful life where they would lay down and read and nap and just relax. Betraying Dad would put them in danger…and if she couldn't be there to protect them, they weren't together twenty four hours a day, then…then maybe she shouldn't have even involved them.

Not unless she had someone to protect them.

Shimazaki loved Minegishi with all of his heart, even more than he loved Mob, so of course he would go along with whatever Minegishi went along with. Also he was still in love with Mob so…so things would be awkward but he would at least be on her side. She would just have to make sure that he acted right. Shibata really didn't like him and neither did Tsuchiya…and she knew for a fact that Shibata was always going to be on her side. A person didn't make another person birthday pancakes and birth sweaters all these years in as row if they weren't on your side. Tsuchiya…she didn't know about Tsuchiya. She just seemed to care about keeping Mukai safe…Mukai. No, there was no way in the world that she was going to involve her baby sister in this. It was bad enough that her little brother was involved!

Her blood brother.

She stepped over Hatori as she made her way to her futon. There was no way that he was ever going to even consider betraying Dad. Dad loved him, in that weird Dad way, and Hatori loved Dad back for some reason. The only person who cared more about Dad was Fukuda and he…well, he apparently loved Sho more than Dad and that was why he was on Sho's side…their side…gross. Being on the same side as Fukuda…

This was one of those things she was going to have to put away.

She was a leader now, she had to be the leader since she was the most powerful and she outranked everyone anyway. She was going to have to put everyone together and help take down Claw…Dad. She was going to take down Dad. She wasn't going to destroy Claw, not when it could be fixed…not when someone like her could fix it. Even if she hadn't been born a boy it didn't matter…it wouldn't matter.

Not if she was the one….the one who was President Suzuki.

Mob smiled as she laid down on her futon. President Suzuki…for real, not just because she had been filling in for Dad. She could have been, the real, and actual president of Claw. She could have done something with her powers for once, something real, something that mattered. Something more than just collecting people to be her friends, more than just staving off loneliness, more than just being…the person she was now. She was Mob but Mob…Mob could be more than Shigeko. More Than Suzuki. More than what the spirit had shown her that she was. Mob could be better.

Mob would be better.

"I could be better." whispered Mob. She didn't care if there was a spider in the corner making a web, an ant running across the floor, or a bird in the window watching her with it's beady eyes. She wanted them to hear her. She wanted everyone to…well, alright, not her friends. Not her sleeping friends and her one sort of adopted brother but still mostly friend who she knew would betray her.

"Better than who, Miss Suzuki?" asked Serizawa as he rolled over to face her. He hadn't been able to sleep, not when she had been out there alone…mostly alone. Her little brother was just a kid, he was too little to protect her, not like Serizawa was…should have. He should have been there but he knew that she had wanted to be alone so, really, he had no choice but to stay awake all night watching the door waiting for her to come back.

And now that she was back he especially couldn't sleep!

"Myself…it's nothing." Said Mob quickly. She couldn't tell him, could she? He was obviously going to be on her side. He was Serizawa, he loved her and she…she didn't know if she wanted to put him in danger. He could have gotten hurt and she didn't want that but also just by being with her, by being at her side, he was in danger…

Maybe this was one of those choices she needed to let him make on his own.

"You're not nothing, Miss Suzuki, you're everything." Said Serizawa quietly. He had to make sure that she heard him but he also didn't wake the others. He didn't like this, when she said bad things about herself. She wasn't a bad person even if some spirit had tried to convince her of it. Bad people didn't do what she did. She risked her life for the people she loved, she had risked her life for that mean girl, and she had risked her life for…for him. She kept him by her side despite how dangerous he was. Despite the fact that she had seen him explode. She not only kept him by her side but also called him her friend…and he'd never had a friend before.

He couldn't have imagined, even if he'd paused this moment and took a thousand years to think on it, a better friend, no, human being than Miss Suzuki.

"I can't be everything, that would be too much. I can only be Mob." Said Mob with a shake of her head. She didn't even know how to be Mob. She had wasted so much time and let things get so bad that her own little brother had decided to step up and do the things that she should have done, been planning on doing, the things that only she could have done.

The things that only she had the power to do.

"Ok...but you're my everything." Said Serizawa. She didn't have to be everything to everyone, just to him, and…and he couldn't decide if it was selfish or not. They were friends and it wasn't like she had let him hide himself from the rest of the group. She so easily could have just given him a new room and told him that she was keeping him away from the world for everyone's sake…but she didn't.

She took him with her.

She took him with her around the world. Not just with her but with her friends, too. She had even let him make friends with her friends. Everything that he had in this world he owed to her and her…her kindness, her wonderfulness, her generosity, her…her everything-ness. She had given him everything, without her he would have had nothing, and that made her his everything.

And yes, he knew that it sounded selfish, but it was the truth. She was his everything and he…was the person who had abandoned her when she had needed him most.

"That's one of the most beautiful things that anyone's ever said to me." said Mob. Serizawa had told her that he loved her before but love…there were a lot of words for love. There weren't a lot of ways to say 'you're my everything'. She wanted to laugh, to cry, to hold him, to be held by him. This was beautiful…this was perfect…this was…

This was what she had always wanted.

"That's because it's the truth. I just can't stop thinking about it…about you. About how you saved me, you saved me in every way a person could be saved, and I was…I was such a coward that I almost left you." said Serizawa

"But you came back, you came back to help face the spirit even though you were afraid, and to me that cancels out you running." Said Mob. No, she wasn't going to hear another word about this. Not from him. He had come back and that was the only thing that mattered. She just had to get him to see it that way somehow. To see himself the way that she saw him.

"But it doesn't cancel it out for me, alright? I should have been better. I shouldn't have treated my friend, my best friend like that. I shouldn't have treated someone I love like that." Said Serizawa

"You love me enough to…to face almost certain death, and especially when you were scared." Said Mob

"I did." Said Serizawa

"I just can't believe that you'd do that for me." said Mob

"I would do anything for you, Miss Suzuki." Said Serizawa

"Even if it was dangerous?" asked Mob

"Even if it was dangerous." Said Serizawa

"Even if you could wind up dead or worse?" asked Mob

"A life without you isn't a life worth living." Said Serizawa

"Even if following me would…would change everything? Maybe even in bad ways and…and I didn't even have a real plan but I knew that it was something that I had to do to make the world a better place and…and to be a better person?" asked Mob

"Yes. I would do anything for you, Miss Suzuki. Even if it was scary, even if I could get hurt, even if my life was on the line. I don't care why you want me to do it, even if it's for something impossible like you wanting to be a better person than you are now. You're my best friend, my everything, and I love you. you saved me and I'm always going to be there for you." said Serizawa

"I love you too." Said Mob before she scooted over to him and did something that made sense, that made more sense than anything she had ever done before. She got closer to him. He opened his arms out and held her close like they did sometimes…and how could she not have seen it? She'd had what she'd wanted the whole time, right there, with her. Sure he was kind of a fixer upper, he didn't always shower as often as he needed to and he'd been wearing these same pajamas for way too long, but she didn't care. You could fix a fixer upper up with a little bit of love after all and he had said he loved her…

And she loved him too.

So she kissed him.

She turned her head upwards and kissed him. This wasn't the best kiss that she'd ever had, the angle was really weird, and also it was kind of awkward since most of her friends were in the room including her little brother, but she had to do this. She had to do this because he loved her and this was what she had wanted all along, probably for her entire life.

Someone to love her.

It wasn't like old times at all but that was alright. Things were going to be better than old times. She was going to be better than the person she was. Mob wasn't Shigeko and she wasn't Suzuki. She was…herself. Someone who wasn't going to sit on the sidelines and let bad things happen. Someone who was going to use her powers for something real, not just collecting friends because she had no other way of getting them. Not someone so desperate for someone to love her that she went after boys who were secretly jerks or already taken and cheating with her. She had someone who loved her and only her…who saw her for what she was and who she was, who had seen her at her very worst, and still loved her with all of his heart.

This wasn't like old times at all, no, it was better.