Neither the story nor the characters belong to me.
Chapter Thirteen
SHIKA
A half hour later, I walked into the clubhouse to find every other member of our crew lounged on the couches in the great room. Thank God my dick had finally realized playtime was over, but my brain wouldn't get the message.
I'd kissed Temari.
Touched Temari.
My tongue had been in her mouth, my fingers inside her sweet little body, and she'd given me a glimpse of heaven. We'd been just as explosive as I knew we would be seven years ago, and I wasn't sure if I felt vindicated or terrified.
Everything I'd told her was the truth. She was in my bones, my soul, every fucking piece of me. That didn't mean I was worthy of her, or even right for her, it was simply fact, and now she knew it.
"Took you long enough" Sasuke called out.
I glanced at the clock.
"We have one-hour recall, and I'm within ten minutes of that, so fuck right off. I'm getting a drink." I told that last part to Kakashi, who nodded from behind his clipboard.
Naruto stood in the kitchen, and I blatantly ignored him, throwing open the refrigerator door and scanning the contents. I pulled out a bottle of water and shut the door, twisting the top off before facing my best friend.
I could still taste Temari in my mouth, sweet and more intoxicating than any alcohol I'd ever consumed. My shirt smelled like her perfume, my fingers still felt warm with the memory of being inside her. I was more than a shitty friend. I was also wearing Temari's wedding ring, and damn it, I wanted to.
Gulping down half the bottle, I turned to see Naruto leaned against the wall, watching me with narrowed eyes.
"What?" I snapped, setting the bottle on the counter.
"Those had better not be my sister's fingernail marks in the back of your fucking neck." His tone was low, steady, and dripped with threat.
And I had fucking had it with him.
"Would you rather they be from someone else?" I rolled up my shirtsleeves, wishing I'd taken the time to get out of my dress clothes like he had. This shit was uncomfortable.
"Are you kidding me? You've been married to her for less than a month, and you're cheating on her?" he roared, stepping forward to the opposite side of the stainless-steel island.
"Whoa, guys." Sasuke filled the doorway.
I put my hand out to deter him. This was between Naruto and me.
"Hell no, I'm not cheating on her. I wouldn't ever do that. Do you have any clue what she means to me?"
"Besides the satisfaction of winning a chase you've been on for years?"
My hands clenched on the cool steel of the island.
"She's not a goddamn chase."
"Tell that to the countless other women you've fucked. Or do you forget that I know you better than anyone else on the planet?"
"Nope, out" I heard Kakashi say, and spared a glance to see both he and Sasuke had their backs to us, guarding us from prying eyes, but not prying ears.
"You are my best friend, Naruto. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to break my promise, but right now, you're not my number-one consideration anymore. Temari is."
I wasn't even sure when that had changed, but it had.
"She's my only consideration! You don't think I know how she feels about you? The stupid infatuation that just won't die? That ruins every relationship she tries to have? You are wrong for her on every level. You won't settle down, and she wants a family and a damn tire swing in the backyard. She's had two serious boyfriends, and you bounce from girl to girl like a pinball in the machine. You risk your life every time you step out on the line, and she shouldn't have to take a phone call like that."
"What exactly do you object to about me? The fact that I'm a manwhore, or that I'm a firefighter just like you?" I folded my arms across my chest.
"Yes to all." His palms slammed down on the island.
Well shit, that hurt.
"So, I'm good enough to be your best friend, just not good enough to be with your sister."
Because that's what it came down to every single time.
"Correct!"
Sasuke spun.
"Fuck you, Naruto, that's too far."
"This doesn't involve you, Sasuke, unless you want him fucking your sister."
"I don't have a sister, asshole."
"Exactly. Neither of you do. I have been responsible for Temari since the day she was born, since my dad put her into my arms and said that she was mine to protect, and I'm not going to fuck that up because you happen to be my friend."
"Yeah, well, it's okay, because we're not friends anymore." I didn't realize how true the words were until I'd already spoken them.
He blinked, his features going completely blank.
"Shika" Sasuke warned softly.
"You want to draw lines like this, then that's what it means. Because I'm done putting your happiness above Temari's, and you should be too. I've never lied to you, Naruto. Not once in our entire lives. You do know me. You know every little thing about me, to include how I felt about Temari the night you put her on the list. You can't trust me to settle down enough to restart this crew with you, trust me enough to save your ass in a fire, and then tell me I don't cut it when it comes to Temari. That's not fair."
"Are those her fingernail marks?" he asked again.
"Let it go before you put us into territory we can't come back from."
"How would you feel if I went after your girl on the list, Shika? If the tables were turned, how would you handle it?"
"If you think my grandmother will let you fuck her, feel free to try, but she's got some pretty high standards."
Kakashi turned, matching Sasuke. From the corner of my eye, I saw Sasuke shake his head to keep Kakashi quiet.
"Are those her fingernail marks?" He seethed.
"You already know the fucking answer! Yes, they're hers."
He flew across the island, but this wasn't the courthouse. This time, I expected the assault. As he slid to land on his feet, I ducked the punch he threw. Naruto was a big asshole, but I was faster. I swept his feet out from under him with my right leg and took him to the ground. His back hit the tile floor, and he struggled for a second to get air into his lungs.
Served him right to get the air knocked out of him. Maybe it would deflate his head a little. With my hand on his chest, I leaned over the guy who was supposed to be my best friend.
"I will never lie to you, so don't ask questions you don't want the answer to. You think all her relationships are fucked up because of me? You think I'm a manwhore? Guess what, asshole, they're linked. You sealed our fates the moment you hit me with that ultimatum."
He glared, still sucking in air in tiny amounts.
"Yeah, that's right. You're the selfish one here, Naruto. She can't have a good relationship for the same reason I don't ever seem to last more than a couple months with a girl. Because I know Temari's the only one I could ever even attempt to commit to, so why the fuck would I torture another woman and drag something out that won't last? So I break it off, and I stay the fuck away from your sister because that's what you demanded, and you and Sasuke are the only brothers I have, and I'll be damned if I'm going to lose the only family I have left. You want to know why your sister is miserable? Look in the fucking mirror."
He shook his head, his breaths coming in even.
"I'm sorry I'm not good enough for Temari. You're right about that. I don't deserve a single word from her lips. But no one on this Earth is good enough for her."
"She's my sister!" he managed to growl.
"She's my wife!"
That brought us both up short. I'd never said it like that, never thrown it in his face that I'd gone against the pact we'd made years ago. I'd never let myself feel that primal possessiveness that came with the title of husband.
"She's my wife" I said again, softer. "And that makes her my family. She and those boys. They are the ones I owe my allegiance to. You are my best friend, and yeah, I want your blessing to see where this thing is headed with Temari, but I don't need it. She doesn't either, believe me. Stop acting like you're her father, or like you're the only one who lost your dad on that mountain. Temari isn't your responsibility anymore, she's mine."
I stood slowly, ready for him to attack me again, but he simply laid his head back on the tile and closed his eyes, his muscles sagging in defeat.
"Do you love her?"
"What?" A vise gripped my chest.
"Do. You. Love. Her?" he repeated.
Did I? I'd never loved anyone that I knew of. Grams, sure. My dad, absolutely. But romantically? I wasn't even sure what that felt like. I wanted Temari. I needed her. But did I love her?
"I…" My forehead puckered. "I don't know?"
Naruto blew out a breath.
"Well, you'd sure as hell know if you did, so you don't. But I do. So you might be married to her, but you're still the worst thing for her, Shika. That's not going to change just because you don't like hearing it. She'll tie herself into knots trying to keep you happy, which is something you don't know how to be. You'll ruin her because you're not capable of loving someone the way she is. Now who is the selfish one?"
I swallowed back my first impulse, which was to tell him that he was wrong…because he wasn't. I didn't know how to be happy, how to be in a healthy, stable relationship, how to give a woman my heart and then trust that she wouldn't walk out like Mom did. I only knew that if I had a chance at anything resembling love, Temari was the only reason.
Sasuke and Kakashi parted as I walked past them. When I reached the living room, everyone there was actively not looking at me. They also actively didn't look at Naruto when he joined us, choosing the opposite side of the room from where I stood.
Kakashi cleared his throat.
"Okay, well, I was going to have us clear some lines for a few hours, but I'm not sure I should hand out chainsaws and axes today, for fear the entire crew won't come back alive. So, how about we do some shelter drills. Everyone get dressed and meet me in the gym with your packs."
Three hours later, my anger still simmered, but the physical activity had drained my need to punch the shit out of Naruto. Besides, I didn't want to upset Temari.
We drilled shelter deployment, teaching the rookies how to effectively get under their protective shelters in case a fire came for us the way it had our fathers. I noticed with more than a little pride that TenTen had taken Karin under her wing, helping her get settled. We left the clubhouse after Kakashi told us to be back bright and early Monday morning, when we'd spend the day cutting line. Fire season was coming fast, and though most of us weren't rookies, we needed to work as a solid team.
I drove home without music, letting my thoughts fill the silence. Had I ruined our friendship? Would I feel the same if I had a sister? Was he being a protective older brother or an asshole? My heart hurt, the anger giving way to the pain of potentially losing Naruto. My life wouldn't look the same without him, but I was done putting his ultimatum above Temari.
I pulled into the driveway and hit the garage door opener, then laughed, closing it again when I saw Denki's new bike and a few other toys occupying my spot. Headlights came up the drive as I got out of my truck, and by the size and shape of the vehicle…yep, it was Naruto.
Fantastic.
Temari came out of the front door with Hoki on her hip, all smiles.
"Hey, you're home!" Her face fell as Naruto put his truck in park but didn't kill the engine.
He got down and walked to where I stood as a barrier between him and Temari.
"Naruto?" Temari asked.
"I just need a second with him" he told her.
"It's okay." I gave her what I hoped was a reassuring smile. She nodded slowly, but her mouth was a straight line as she headed back inside, shutting the door behind her. "What do you need? Because I don't know how much more I can take today."
He stuck his thumbs in his pockets and sighed.
"I'll think about what you said."
"What?" I would have been less shocked if he'd announced he was moving to China.
"You made some pretty valid points." He finally looked at me and shrugged. "I don't know what will happen, or where my head will land, but I will think about what you said."
"And stop trying to beat the shit out of me?" I prodded.
"Maybe." He gave me a little half smile. "Tell my sister I love her. See you Monday."
He was halfway to his truck before I found my voice.
"We're having Chance over for dinner tomorrow. He couldn't make it tonight. Why don't you come too? I know she'd love to have you. Plus, it would keep me from slaughtering him."
Take the olive branch.
He paused for so long that I nearly gave up hope, never turning around.
"I'll bring steaks."
Relief hit me with such strength I almost fell to my knees.
"Sounds good. See you at five."
He put up his hand in a wave and walked the rest of the way to his truck. I watched him pull out of the driveway with an odd mix of sadness and hope warring for priority in my head.
I chose hope and walked inside to see my wife.