I am sorry. English is not my mother tongue and in the rush I may have made some mistakes.

Neither the story nor the characters belong to me.

Chapter Fourtheen

TEMARI

"Temari! Come quick!"

I dropped the pan of brownies on the counter and threw the oven mitts on the island as I ran out of the kitchen to the great room.

"What's wrong?" I skidded to a halt on the hardwood.

"Look!" Shika said, his phone up to face as he took video.

I followed his line of sight and laughed. Hoki had pulled up to stand and was grinning like a madman as he pounded on the coffee table with his hands.

"No way!"

Keeping my footsteps soft, I walked onto the carpet, scared to startle him.

"He's standing!" Denki came in behind me and raced over to his brother. "Are you a big boy? You're standing like one!"

Hoki bounced, his giggle utterly contagious, before falling back on his butt with a loud thump. He clapped his hands together and crawled over again, pulling himself to stand.

"He's amazing, right? That's got to be some kind of world record. I know he's bound for the Olympics," Shika said, tucking his phone into the back pocket of his jeans.

His long-sleeved shirt was pushed up to his elbows, revealing the tanned skin of his forearms. How was it fair that he'd seen me practically naked yesterday, and I was still drooling over forearm porn?

"I'm not sure they have a baby-standing event, but if they do, Hoki is definitely a contender," I answered.

He came over, a look in his eyes I couldn't quite define, but I liked it. It was the same one he'd had since he came home last night. Before we'd had a chance to talk, he had to run out again for a busted pipe at the Chatterbox, and I'd been asleep by the time he made it back.

"You have chocolate on your face." He brushed a finger at the corner of my mouth.

"I have a thing for brownie mix," I answered with a shrug.

"I have a thing for you," he whispered before ducking his head and kissing it clean.

Boom, I was high, my heart fluttering in the way I thought only happened in teenage rom-coms. He kissed my lips next, a soft brush of lips that left me leaning forward for more.

"Can we talk?"

My eyes flew open.

"Is this about you and my brother last night?" He nodded.

I looked to see that Denki and Hoki were happy in the middle of the living room and stepped back into the kitchen with Shika, where we could see if the kids got into trouble, or if Hoki decided to start running or something. It was crazy how fast he developed, and we'd only had him a little over a month. What would he be doing in another month? Or two? Three? Would they still be here? That happy, glowy feeling Shika gave me plummeted at the thought of them leaving.

"Okay, what's up?" I hopped up onto the counter with my back to the boys.

He put his hands on my knees, and they spread slightly, like my body recognized what the man was capable of and was more than willing for a second round.

I definitely was.

"Okay, so yesterday…"

"Which part of yesterday? The part where my mother wouldn't accept that we're not married in the real sense of the word? The part where Naruto stormed out?" I dropped my voice so the kids wouldn't hear "The part where you gave me the best orgasm of my life?"

His grip tightened, and the way his eyes dropped to my lips started a low-level hum in my belly.

"Kind of all of it, but mostly the way Naruto and I got into it at work and said a few things we probably shouldn't have."

"Okay."

Crap.

Naruto was driving me nuts with his super-protective bullshit, but he was my brother. That was sacred no matter how much I loved Shika.

"He saw some nail marks on the back of my neck and put two and two together."

No regret showed in his eyes, which was a huge relief.

"Well, shit. Sorry about that."

"I'm not." His hands slid to my thighs, tugging me closer so my knees flanked his hips. "I'm not sorry about a single damn thing that happened yesterday. Are you?"

My breath caught.

"No, of course not. I've been trying to get my hands on you since I was sixteen…even though I still haven't really managed that. Don't smile at me like that, not when we have kids in the other room and company coming in an hour," which included Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto, and the new guy.

He glanced over my shoulder, no doubt checking on the boys.

"So, after we had…a moment at work —don't worry, there was no blood— he came over to say that he's thinking about what I said to him."

"Which was?"

"A lot."

"Got it."

A lot was bro-code for not telling you, and I was cool with that. They were best friends, and if I wanted any chance of being with Shika, I had to make sure I didn't cost them that bond.

"So as much as I want nothing more than to carry you upstairs, strip you naked, and make you come about twelve different ways to start with, I can't." His grip tightened on me.

"Okay."

A thousand different reasons went through my head, and none of them came to the conclusion that it really was. Maybe he didn't regret what happened yesterday, but he wasn't looking to repeat it either. It's prom night all over again. As usual, I'd fallen into the trap that was Shika, lured by kisses and even the barest sliver of a chance he'd be mine. Even married, he belonged to my brother. Think about the boys. They were why we were doing this. Wanting Shika was unfortunate, but it wasn't like I'd never not wanted him. We were simply returning to the status quo, but I wasn't sure I was capable.

"Temari."

"Yep?"

Using my hands, I pushed back on the granite so our bodies weren't so close, but I couldn't close my knees with him between them.

"It's not because I don't want to." He used those eyes on me, all liquid and soft enough to drown in.

Problem was, I'd been drowning so long I feared death was imminent from lack of oxygen and too many shots to the heart.

"Yeah, okay. Got it. I need to change really quick, if you'll just move."

"No. Not until you understand."

I looked pointedly at his hands, which were still on my thighs, and then lifted a single eyebrow at him. He picked them up and stepped back, leaving me enough room to get down, which I did.

"Temari!"

I walked right past him, blinking back tears of my own stupidity.

"We're not done," he said, coming up behind me.

I went up the first three steps and turned, bringing me eye level with him.

"Just let me get it straight. You want me. You've always wanted me. You had no problem kissing me yesterday, or today, but because of a conversation you had with my brother, it won't be happening again, but it's not because you don't want me."

"Yes. No. Kind of." He shook his head.

"Then I think our conversation is done. I'm going to change into something clean. If that's okay with you, or you could call Naruto and ask his permission."

Without waiting for his response, I went upstairs, into the guest room that was across the hall from Shika's.

Stupid fucking men.

I shut my door a little harder than necessary and ripped my shirt off. It found the hamper, and my yoga pants came off next, joining it. I never was a clean baker.

"Temari." Shika knocked at the door. "I'm coming in."

"Whatever," I said, rifling through my things that hung in the walk-in closet.

I heard him open and shut the door. Blue…green…did it even matter what color shirt I wore? Maybe I'd let Naruto and Shika decide, since they were all about making my choices for me. The purple blouse with the lace overlay would be just fine.

"I would have followed you faster, but I had to put Hoki in his prison." I refused to laugh, but a snort escaped.

"It's a playpen."

"You say playpen, I say baby prison. Will you please come out here and talk to me?"

"Sure." I walked out of the closet and tossed the blouse onto the bed next to where Shika sat.

His jaw dropped as I walked past in my underwear.

"Holy fucking shit, Temari." My name came out as a groan.

"What? It's not like you didn't see it yesterday, and you're the one insisting that we talk. Besides, since you're not touching it again, who really cares?" I shrugged, then opened the dresser drawer that held my jeans.

I chose the softest pair and shut the drawer.

"I didn't say I was never touching you," he argued in a strangled voice.

I turned to see him gripping fistfuls of the mint-green comforter on my queen-size bed. "You know what? I don't care. I'm so sick of feeling like I have to chase you. It's exhausting, honestly."

"Because you want me to touch you." A slight smirk lifted his lips.

"You know I do!" I snapped.

He was off the bed before I could blink, and I found my back against the wall with Shika pressed against my front. My jeans hit the floor and my body melted, just like it always did when he was close.

"What?" I glared up at him, trying to ignore the way my nerve endings sizzled, my traitorous nipples hardened.

"You don't have to chase me. You caught me seven years ago, you just didn't know it. Hell, you caught me when I was ten years old. You've always been the only person I could ever see myself having a life with."

"You make zero sense, Shikamaru. If you want someone, if you love someone, you don't let them walk away. You fight for it. You fight for them."

"In your world, maybe. In mine, people leave. They walk out and never come back, not even when your dad dies."

"I'm not your mom."

My heart hurt for him, for his inability to trust, no matter how long he'd known me, how many times I'd stood by him.

"I know that. You're nothing like her. You're honest, and kind, and strong. God, you're the strongest woman I know. There are so few people in this world that I…"

Love. Say it.

I knew he was capable. He showed it in every way possible to the people he cared about, whether or not that was how he defined it.

"…consider mine. And I can't afford to lose anyone. Not you, but also…" He sighed.

"Not Naruto," I whispered.

He nodded.

"Besides Grams, he and Sasuke were all I had. And you, of course."

"And me," I echoed.

"Always you. But I can't just turn my back on him when he thinks I violated our most sacred vow to each other. You're his name on this list."

"What list?" My eyes narrowed.

"The one where we get to choose one girl the other two aren't allowed to sleep with." His forehead wrinkled. "Which, when I say that aloud, sounds pretty stupid."

"Try prehistoric," I snapped.

"Yeah, well, we were teenagers, and I think Sasuke just wanted to make sure we didn't get near Sakura."

"So he licked her like one of my preschoolers with a snack he doesn't want to share?"

His eyes trailed from mine, past my lips, to the rise of my breasts.

"Something like that."

"And you're saying Naruto…what? Licked me? Because that's gross."

Gross and infuriating.

"Not exactly. Prom night, after we kissed, Naruto saw the way I watched you, how hard it was for me to see you with that other guy. Right before you walked out the door with him, Naruto put you as his name on the list. He knew it was the only way I was guaranteed not to go after you."

My stomach turned over.

"Why would he do that?" I whispered.

How could he be so cruel to Shika? To me?

"Because he knew that I wasn't good enough for you. Hell, I'm still not."

"Shika..."

"Just hear me out. You were the one who asked me to let you in." He winced. "There's something broken inside of me, something that won't let me…"

"Commit," I supplied.

He nodded.

"Something like that. He knew it then, that I would eventually crush you the way I do everyone else, and even if I managed not to, he knew I wanted to be a hotshot. He didn't do it to hurt you, he did it to protect you from me. Because this"—he splayed his hand in the hollow of my lower back and tugged me closer—"this attraction, our chemistry, is pretty obvious. I just never realized everyone else knew until I came back. He knew how close I was to punching Vic in the face every time I saw him that summer, how excruciating it was to know he'd touched you. Naruto knew it without me ever having to say a word."

I looped my arms around his neck, running my fingers down the back where my nails had marred his perfect skin.

"I never let Vic touch me."

His eyes widened.

"What?"

"How could I, when all I could think about was you? God, you pretty much ruined my sex life for years. Every year, if I'm being honest. I couldn't figure out why I didn't feel the same urgency when someone kissed me. Why it was good but not"—I rose against him, rubbing my lace-cupped breasts against his chest and caressing his growing hardness with my belly—"this. I thought I made it up, glorified it in my memory."

"But you didn't." His hand swept down to cup my ass over my lace boy- cut panties. "We're just that good together."

I nodded.

"You ruined me for anyone else with that one kiss." He brushed his mouth over mine.

"So, what do we do? Let Naruto keep us apart another seven years? That's assuming you want to...not be apart." Smooth, Temari.

Super smooth.

His lips turned up at the corners.

"We are married, you know."

"Yeah, I heard. Apparently, it's the latest gossip around town."

"I'm not saying seven years. I'm not even saying seven months. I'm just asking that we give him a chance to come around. If he doesn't, that's on him. I'm not walking away from you." He kissed me gently. "I'm not saying I won't kiss you." His hands gripped my ass and lifted me in an insanely sexy display of strength. I hooked my legs around his waist as he leaned me back against the wall. "I'm not saying I won't touch you." One of those hands slid from my ass to between my thighs, sending tendrils of need straight through me. "I'll make you come as many times as you want, Temari. God, I can't think of anything better."

"I can." I wiggled, which both moved his hand and rocked my hips against his erection.

"Yeah, that." He leaned his forehead against mine. "Just give me a little time so I don't lose my best friend because of what I feel for his sister."

I was helpless against that admission. He could have asked me to wait ten years and I would have—that was the power Shika had over me.

"And if he never comes around?"

"Then he's not who I know he is, and that's not going to stop me—stop us—from seeing where this leads."

He meant what he said. I saw it in his eyes, felt it in the way he held me. But that didn't mean he wouldn't decide differently when Naruto forced his hand.

"You scare me," I admitted. "This is everything I've ever wanted, and if you say that you're willing to try and then you change your mind, I'm not sure I can handle that."

He kissed me gently.

"Then I'm just going to have keep giving you reasons to believe in me. I can do that. I won't give you the opportunity to doubt me, not ever." He set me down and backed away. "Now please get some clothes on before I doubt my own restraint."

"One question first. Who was your girl for the list?" I tried not to let jealousy seep into my voice, but it was an epic fail.

A slow smile spread across his face.

"She's beautiful, inside and out. Loyal, hard-working, tough as nails, and one of the most phenomenal women I've ever met." He paused, and I tilted my head in exasperation. "And she's the only other woman to wear that ring." He pointed to my left hand and walked out, leaving me staring at a closed door.

His grandmother.

I let my head fall back and sighed up at the ceiling. Ugh, instead of guarding my heart, now I loved him even more. Dressing quickly, I headed downstairs to get ready for dinner and nearly got run over in the hallway by Denki as he ran by me in some kind of vest.

"He's gonna get me!" he squealed.

"You bet I am!"

Shika came sprinting out of the office, wearing a bigger size of the same gear and carrying a plastic gun. He paused to kiss me and then took off after Denki. As I heard Shika whining that Denki had killed him with a chest shot, I checked on Hoki, happy to see he wasn't wearing a laser-tag vest too.

Two hours later, the kids were down to bed, and the adults cleaned up dinner. It had gone well, considering Naruto had barely spoken and spent most of his time watching Shika and me watch each other.

Talk about awkward.

"I could get used to this." Sakura took a sip of her wine and watched from the living room as the guys loaded the dishwasher. Even Chance was helping.

"Definitely qualifies as porn." Especially with Shika's sleeves rolled up like that.

"How are things going in that area?" Saku asked, raising her eyebrows.

I watched Shika and wanted plain and simple. What was it about being so close to what you wanted but so far from having it that made you desperate? I'd never been like this over a guy.

"It's kind of like being in a bakery with your favorite dessert, but it's locked up behind the window, so you can look at it, but that's it. And you're trapped there. Forever. And the dessert is naked. And it's Shika."

"Yikes."

"Oh, and maybe you get to lick the dessert, just get a little taste, and it's so damn good. I mean like…earth-shattering good. And all you want to do is eat the fucking dessert, but you can't. Because your brother locked the display case, and you can't figure out why he won't just give you the damn key."

Sakura's side-eye turned into a full, head-on, wide-eyed head turn.

"So, it's going well, then?"

"Did you ever just want to jump Sasuke? Like, push him down, rip his clothes off, and climb on? Because I seriously feel like this horny, desperate woman who's on the verge of losing her mind over sex. Sex, Sakura. I. Want. Sex."

"Okay, well, yeah, especially when we were in the will-we, won't-we phase. It was tough." She gave her fiancé a dreamy look that I flat-out envied. They'd always been like that, though.

"What did you do about it?"

"I pretty much locked him in his office and did exactly that. But as complicated as Sasuke and I were, you and Shika take the cake."

"I want the cake."

Shika winked at me and went back to his conversation with Naruto. At least they were talking.

"I can see that." Sakura tried her best not to smile but failed.

"Don't laugh at me."

"I'm not, I promise. I was just thinking about when Sasuke came home, and you said that I couldn't settle for less than the kind of chemistry…oh, what were your words? Scratching, clawing, biting need to rip someone's clothes off, I believe. Now you've got it."

"What if he doesn't want the cake?" My voice dropped to a whisper.

"Trust me, he wants the cake. He's wanted the cake since you filled out your jeans. That's never been an issue."

"Did I hear you say you wanted some cake, Temari?" Chance asked as he came into the living room. "I can grab you some."

"Only if you want Shika to kick your ass from here to the Utah border," Sakura answered, then full-on laughed.

"What was that?" Shika came in and gave Chance a look that sent him to the other side of the living room.

"They were talking about wanting cake, so I offered to get some," Chance answered with a shrug.

Sakura laughed even harder.

"Stop!" I told her, but she was almost crying.

"Oh, come on, Chance is offering you cake. Don't you want some? I bet it's really good cake." She managed a straight face.

"I don't want his cake," I muttered.

Shika's eyes narrowed on me.

"I want his cake." I said it quietly, but he heard me.

Something must have clicked, because he immediately turned to Chance.

"Don't ever offer my wife cake again. Ever. Or you'll never have cake again with anyone."

"You guys are so fucking weird. I will see you at work tomorrow. Temari, thank you so much for having me over for dinner. Your brownies are seriously amazing."

"She makes fantastic cake too." Sakura giggled.

"No cake!" Shika snapped at Chance, who put his hands up and backed away, darn near running for the door. "Sasuke, get in here and take your fiancée home. I think she's had a little too much wine."

"Oh, come on, Shika. You're no fun. You used to be fun. I'm just trying to hook your wife up with some dessert. Geeze." Saku looked my way. "How much wine did I drink?"

"I think you put away a full bottle."

"Really? Whoa. Yeah, no more." She put her glass down on the coffee table. "Sasuke Uchiha!"

"Sakura?" Sasuke answered, coming into the living room.

"Take me home. I want cake." She threw Shika a look. "One of us should be getting cake, don't you think?"

"For fuck's sake," Shika said to the ceiling.

"Saku, we don't have any cake at home. Did you want me to stop at the store?" Sasuke offered, pulling her to her feet. "I think the closest you're getting are the Pop-Tarts you bought last week."

"Trust me, you have just the cake she's looking for" I told him. "Just get her home."

"Yeah, okay." He walked forward and picked her up, putting her over his shoulder. "Let's get home."

"Night!" I waved at my friend as she tried to prop herself up.

"Get the cake!" she called back, giggling.

I couldn't wait to tell her about this in the morning.

Shika leaned over me, putting one arm on each side of the armchair I sat in.

"So, apparently you're in the mood for dessert?" His voice rasped over me like the finest grit sandpaper, smooth but gritty enough to ruffle my nerves.

"Yes, please."

"You're not getting any of Chance's, that's for damn certain."

My fingers tangled in the opening of his button-down shirt.

"I don't want Chance's."

"You're fucking killing me, you know that?" He groaned.

"Good."

He grinned, and I felt it in every cell in my body.

Someone cleared their throat, and Shika stiffened.

"Totally forgot he was here."

"I didn't," Naruto answered. "Tema, walk me to my car?"

Shika helped me to my feet, and I headed toward Naruto, who was conveniently looking anywhere but at us.

"Let's go, big brother." I hooked my arm through his, and we walked out to his truck. "Okay, give it to me."

"Give what to you?" he asked just outside our front door.

"The lecture you have prepared about how bad Shika is for me, and how you don't want me with a fireman, and how he's just going to hurt me." I folded my arms to ward off the early-May chill.

He rubbed his hands over his face.

"You already know all that, so you don't need me telling you."

"Then what else do you have in your anti-Shika arsenal?"

"Nothing. He's my best friend. He's a great guy. Smart, brave, loyal to the bone, you name it."

"Okay?"

"He's also reckless as fuck during fires, fearless, unattached, and emotionally unavailable to every woman he's ever tried to have a relationship with. His mom really screwed with his head, Tema. That's the kind of damage you might not be able to undo."

"Maybe I want to try. Maybe he needs someone to try, to prove to him that it's possible to stay even when it's easy to leave."

"You really want to spend your life paying for another woman's sins? Even if you do get through to him, he's a hotshot. You always told me that wasn't what you wanted. You wanted a guy with a desk job, remember? That's why you ended up with tricky Dicky."

"Gemma," I corrected him. "And yeah, I did, but that was when I was sixteen. Are you telling me that you've carried that around with you since then? That you're making us miserable because of something I said when I couldn't even parallel park?"

"You still can't parallel park."

"Stop joking, Naruto. I love him. I have always loved him."

He grasped my shoulders like we were kids again.

"What happens when he can't love you back?" There was no malice in his eyes, just deep sadness. "I've known him my whole life. I'm not warning you because I want to be a dick, or to control your life. I just want you happy, and loved, and adored. Shika can probably give you most of that for a while, but long term? What are you going to do when he isn't capable of returning all that love in your heart?"

I sucked in a stuttered breath. He wasn't being mean, or even sarcastic. He was genuinely worried, and as the person who probably knew Shika the best, I had to give my brother the benefit of really thinking about my answer. It was the same discussion I'd had with myself when my building manager called today to tell me the reconstruction was finally done from the flood damage in my apartment. I could leave—it was big enough to take the boys, but I didn't want to. I wanted to stay here and fight for what I had with Shika.

"Then I guess I'm going to have to love enough for the both of us until he won't let me anymore. And yeah, I might get hurt, but I'm going into this with my eyes wide open. I know him. I know what he's like, what he does. I know even he doesn't think he can love, but I know he can. He already does. He loves his gram. He loves you and Sasuke. If he doesn't love me, then it will have to be okay, because the only thing worse than losing him would be to never have him in the first place."

Naruto studied me for a moment, then pulled me in for a hug.

"I love you so much, Tema. I just want you to know that you deserve to be with someone who loves as deep and strong as you do."

I nodded.

"I know." And it's Shika.

"Fire season officially starts next week. We're still B level until we certify, but it's still dangerous."

"I know." I squeezed him "But I also know that you're good at what you do, and so is Shika."

"So was Dad, and you see what Mom is like now."

"I know." This time, my answer was a whisper. "I promise you that I'll be careful with Shika as long as you are too, okay? Bring him home to me."

Naruto kissed the top of my head.

"I'm still not sure about this."

"I am."

He let me go, and after his taillights faded from our driveway, I walked back into the house.

"Well, that was fun."

"Look who woke up with a brownie craving," Shika said from where he sat with Denki at the kitchen island, spoon-deep in a brownie.

I shook my head as I ruffled Denki's hair. Then I grabbed my own brownie and sat next to my boys as Denki laughed. May as well enjoy the only dessert I'd be getting tonight.

"Everything okay?" Shika asked.

"I think it might be."

And for the first time, I believed it.