Harry's second year at Hogwarts at once became both very fun and incredibly busy. Thanks to his efforts at the tryouts, the new seeker found himself on the quidditch field three times a week for practice. He then also took on Soros' advice and went to the VATIC orientation night. After the orientation, interview, and a quick, hidden vote by the original members, Harry ended up elected as the new Hufflepuff rep. (Discovering soon after that he -weirdly- was replacing Cedric Diggory for a second time this month.) He, along with the other new members (Tracey Davis, Dean Thomas, Parvati Patil, Stephen Cornfoot, and a first year girl named Luna Lovegood) were then swept into a brain-storming session about possible ideas for this year's event. Taking all of this in, including flying club, art club, parseltongue lessons, and his regular class schedule, it was amazing that Harry found himself with any free time at all!

It wasn't until near the end of October that Harry settled into a rhythm and found time to work on one of his side projects for the year. It took a few days to get supplies from the Weasleys and scope the location, but by Saturday Harry was nearly ready to put his plan into action. All he needed left was someone to volunteer as a scapegoat…

"YOU! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"

The shriek could be heard from the entrance of the great hall. Everyone instantly turned to the source of the sound. At first the hall was confused. All they could see was a student shaking with laughter as they leaned against the door, but clearly that wasn't the person who was shouting. That changed when a younger girl stomped towards the laughing figure, with both hands clutching her face. The sight got stranger as three more girls followed suit, all with hands hiding their faces.

Harry and a few others got closer to the commotion. Getting a clearer view, he noticed that the leaning figure was actually Melly, doubling over with laughter.

"CHANGE IT BACK! I KNOW IT WAS YOU!"

"You did it to yourself!" Melly snided with another heap of laughter. She attempted to upright herself, but seemed to sway as she did so.

The younger girl's arms flung down as she shouted "WE DID NOT!" In doing so, though, her face was exposed. At its centre, a bulbous, red, clown nose beaconed bright for all to see. Instantly, the hall erupted with laughter. The four younger girls all blushed with embarrassment, but the leader remained indignant against the older one. "You horrible witch! Change them back!"

"I cAn'T~" Melly sang merrily. Her body seemed to twist as she playful sang teases at the girls. "You signed the dotted line, and so you paid the fine. Stealing is against the rules, and now your nose will shine!"

"That's enough!" McGonagall's voice cut in. Like a hot knife to butter, the students parted out of the professor's way. "What is the meaning of this?"

This time, one of the other girls spoke up. "Bennett hexed us, professor!" She cried. "We woke up to our noses looking like this and Bennett admitted to planning it!"

McGonagall raised an expectant brow towards Melly. "Did you?" She queried.

Melly haphazardly shrugged her shoulders and offered a grin, moving entirely as though she were drunk. "You can always tell who has sticky fingers during orientation, professor. Not my fault they didn't follow the rules."

"I see…Very well, you are free to go."

The younger girls looked on in shock. "But professor-!"

"Miss Grimmett, you are hardly the first students to succumb to the anti-thievery jinx, though I am disappointed to see you are the first foolish enough to claim that a student has snuck into Ravenclaw tower to hex all four of you in your sleep. Especially after knowingly signing a contract which details the risk of such an effect. For stealing and accusing a fellow student, I have no choice but to deduct thirty points from each of you." The girls tried to protest, but were cut off again. "If you don't wish to have a further deduction then I suggest that you return whatever it is you four have taken before seeing Madam Pomfrey to have the jinx removed. Are we clear?" A muttering chorus of assent came from the four girls. "Good. You are dismissed."

Thoroughly cowed, the four ravenclaws fled down the corridor. Most of the other students returned to their seats. Harry nearly did the same, but found his eyes diving to Melly as she stumbled towards the ground, then was caught and brought back on her feet by Flinton. Harry could hear Flinton mutter assurances to the girl. "Hey, hey, easy there. Are you alright?"

"What? I'm Fine…" Melly answered breathily. The girl suddenly went cross-eyed and grinned stupidly. "Hey, look, my nose is red, too!"

Flinton rolled her eyes. "That's because you're sick, you idiot. I told you you need to drink some pepperup potion."

"And I told you that I just need some rest, is all."

"Sleep. Right. And how's that going for you?" She muttered sarcastically. She hoisted the girl so that her arm wrapped around the girl's shoulder. "That's it, you're going to Madam Pomfrey, too!"

"Is she alright?" Harry asked tentatively.

"No." Flinton sighed. "The idiot caught Jacqueline's flu and refuses to go to the hospital wing."

"I'm just sleepy!"

"It's been a week and you're getting worse!"

"Would you like some help?" Harry offered.

Flinton's expression fell in relief. "Please."

Nodding to the girl, Harry stepped into Melly's other side and helped her up. Melly continued to insist that they were worrying over nothing, but Harry found inspiration to change that. "You know, Melly, if you get better soon, you'll be the perfect person to help me prank Filch."

"Prank Filch?" Her steps faltered as she turned to stare at him with bleary eyes. Though, thankfully, it seemed to work as another stupid smile warmed her face. "That… is fabulous! You're doing me so proud, kid. We got soooo many ideas!" She slurred, before catching her feet solid against the floor and started walking again.

Flinton flashed him a grateful look, mouthing "thank you" to him, as the three finally got on pace to the hospital wing.

BOOM!

The dungbombs rocked the second-floor hallway with noise and stench. What few students were nearby raced away from the smell. Under the cloak, Harry watched as Filch burst out of his office to survey the situation. Through the smoke it was hard to see far into the hallway. Though they could both certainly hear a cackling that echoed through the corridor.

"Clown balls on noses and pepperup potions! Halls filled with shrieking and dungbomb explosions! Walder Frey snubbed in the War of Five Kings, these are a few of my favourite things!"

Filch swore loudly and coughed into the fog. "Curse you, you wretched brat! Get back here!" He sped off in the direction of the singing. Harry moved just as quickly -catching the door to Filch's office before it could close- and snuck inside. He searched through the office as quickly as he could. Try as he might, though, Filch ended up returning to the office before he could find the parchment. As the door handle wriggled, Harry threw the cloak over himself. Then, with bated breath, he dove through the door just before Filch closed it again. Harry ran through the stink of the corridor, up the stairs and over to the room of requirement. There he found Melly laying on a pillowed chaise, ears still steaming with pepperup.

"I'm surprised you didn't get caught."

"So am I." Melly replied. "It was pretty cool, actually. Nearly Headless Nick sent him in the wrong direction and offered me a gig."

"A what?"

"A gig. Said I could thank him for helping with Filch by coming to his Deathday party. I one-upped him and offered to just play some songs for the party. Pretty sweet deal, actually."

Harry shook his head. "Only you could turn a thank you to your own benefit."

"Oh yeah? And what about you? Did my sacrificial act get you what you were looking for?"

"No." Harry answered dejectedly. He slouched onto the opposing chaise. "Filch came back before I could find it."

"There's always next time." A yawn overtook her as she shut her eyes. "What were you looking for, anyways?"

"Something that belonged to Uncle Sirius, Remus, and my dad. It's a map that shows all of Hogwarts and the people in it."

Melly turned befuddled eyes in his direction. "You mean the Marauders Map?"

"How do you-?! Oh, of course you'd know about that!" Harry rolled his eyes at the futility of the question.

"I don't need the attitude, kid. Besides, if you want it so much just ask Fred and George for it. They're the ones that have the map."

"Really?!"

"Yeah. I rented it off of them back in first year. I'm sure they can lend it to you if you ask."

"That's perfect!" Harry hopped out of the seat. "Let's go ask them, now!"

Melly yawned again, but slowly joined in the ascent. "If you say so, kid."

When they found them, Jordan and the Weasleys took in an exaggerated breath of air. "Ah! The smell of dungbombs in the evening! Is there anything like it?"

"Oh, I'm sure we can come up with something, brother mine."

"But the location is a whole other matter." Jordan winked. "Filch's office. Awfully bold of you to prank. Good job!"

"Thanks, Jordan."

"Shall we celebrate your success, young Harry?"

"Actually, I was hoping you can help me with something else. I hear you two own the Marauders Map."

The twins gasped and pointed accusing fingers at Melly. "Bennett! That was top-secret information you divulged!"

She shrugged carelessly. "In all fairness, he was already looking for it."

"Oh really?" The twins looked at each other in silent communication. "And how, pray tell, did you come to learn the secret of our success?"

"If you bring it out, I'll show you." Harry brought out his wand and prompted for the map. The twins immediately checked their surroundings, ensuring that only they five could see, and brought the map out of one of their pockets. Though hesitant about Harry's wand, they allowed him to place it onto the parchment as he spoke. "I, Harry Potter -son of James Potter and Lily Evans-, bid salutations to Messrs Moony, Padfoot and Prongs."

The group closed in as a series of phrases bloomed along the parchment.

Mister Moony returns salutations to Mister Potter and congratulates him on finding this parchment.

Mister Wormtail inquiries as to why his name was not included in the salutation?

Mister Padfoot wonders how James Potter managed to snag a bird like Lily Evans?

Mister Prongs would like to remind Padfoot that James Potter is the most dashing and charming wizard at Hogwarts, and clearly Lily Evans has finally realized that truth.

"They knew your dad?" Jordan asked.

Harry smiled fondly at the final phrase. "Prongs is my dad. I mean- he was."

The twins' jaws dropped. "Prongs is your dad?! Then that means-!"

"Padfoot and Moony, my godfather and their friend, Remus Lupin."

"Wow! But, wait… Wormtail, he's…" "Pettigrew." They realized.

Harry nodded solemnly.

"Well…" The twins looked awkwardly between Harry and the map. "For what it's worth, he was an ugly old rat, anyways."

The words brought a half-smile to his face. Still, he couldn't help but look at that last phrase forlornly. "It's nice to meet you, dad. Sorry it couldn't be in person."

He felt Melly's hand rest on his shoulder. "Harry…" Any breath of words faded as new ones appeared on the parchment.

Mister Moony asks if Harry Potter and Remus Lupin have met in person?

Mister Wormtail is very much confused as to what's going on.

Mister Padfoot is proud to hear that he was named dogfather to the newest generation of Marauders.

Mister Prongs is nervous to ask why Messrs Potter have not met in person, but is very happy to be able to speak with you here.

Tears slipped from Harry's eyes. He wiped them from his cheeks, yet he found himself smiling. "Is it alright if I borrow this?"

"Borrow it?" The twins looked at each other with complex expressions. "Mate, your dad made this. There's no way you can just borrow it."

"Keep it. It's yours." The other added.

"Wait, really?"

"Of course."

"We may want to borrow it on occasion-"

"-but it belongs to you, and your godfather, too."

"Wait! Fred! This means we've met a Marauder in person!"

"You're right!"

"We should send him a letter-"

"-ask for tips-"

"-and tricks!"

"This will be brilliant!"

As they talked on, Harry stepped away from the group and found a quiet place to sit. He stared at the now-blank parchment, excited and nervous at once. Uncle Sirius explained to him that the map only shows their personalities from how they were as teenagers, that this won't be like talking to a living, breathing James Potter. Still, this was his dad; at least, the boy that would become his dad. It won't give him everything he dreamed, but he can finally talk and ask questions that he's always wanted to know about his parents. Centering his emotions, Harry placed his wand back on the parchment and continued with the conversation.