Authors Note: I own nothing. No ownership rights to Beverly Hills 90210.

Chapter Thirty-Three

"Bren please stop cleaning. I'm scared you're going to actually polish through the table soon."

"Dylan they'll be here soon-" I move over to her and take the cloth out of her hand, she lets it go without a fight.

"I know and the house looks amazing, the dogs are even brushed and Rebel hasn't even approached the plant in the corner- I think they are even worried to set you off." I smile in understanding I know what she is trying to do. "Baby you and I both know it doesn't matter what we do your Dad's never going to love that we live together, even if he can clearly see we have separate rooms. He doesn't think I'm good enough for you and that's not going to change because the table is so shiny you could use it as a mirror."

"Dylan I just want them to see how good this all is. The college, the house, and us. I just want them to support and… well like maybe too much but be okay with all this."

"Maybe let's lower expectations, let's try for the twenty-four hour's they are here that there is no fighting, if we can get that the maybe their next trip down we can aim for acceptance, okay may need a couple of months to achieve."

She sadly nods her head, "yeah okay it's a win if there is no yelling. Did you take all the mistletoe down?"

"I did and while I agree it shouldn't be up while your parents are here- that's one doorway I never want to walk through with Jimbo. I don't see why you are saying no to it being up permanently."

"As if you need the mistletoe to try and steal a kiss."

"The mistletoe makes it compulsory, no stealing necessary."

She leans in and kisses me then, I wrap her in my arms and pull her tighter. She move's away and gives me a gentle smile, "no stealing or required kisses from now on. Let's just do it when we want to, okay?"

She goes to step away but I pull her back and kiss her again, when i want to right! It's a kiss that has me running my hands down past her hips and lifting her up, when her legs wrap around me I pull my mouth away but don't put her down. "We have to stop, otherwise it doesn't matter how many separate bedrooms they see they'll know that that we are an us."

"Us huh?"

"We are title-less for the moment but we are still an us, we are-" the knock on the door has me stopping and putting her down on the ground. She quickly moves to the mirror in the hallway to fix her hair while I grab the polish and cloth and bring it to the laundry. We meet behind the hall door before I open it I look at her, "a win is no fighting, expectations low." She nod's then turns the handle.

It actually isn't that bad, Jim as always is uncomfortable about any symbolism of my wealth and he sees the house that a normal nineteen year old wouldn't be able to afford as a screaming example of that, so Cindy makes comment on the view while Jim sticks to the furniture. He's surprised that Bren and I chose antics and flea market find's, besides the couch and mattresses everything even the warn in leather armchairs are pre owned.

Over lunch on the back deck he asks about some of the finds.

"Yeah the rugs were actually from a store a few towns away, we wanted something that made the place a little warm but being on the beach nothing you'd be too afraid to walk on. It's actually how we made every decision for the house, comfortable and nothing too precious. It was fun going through the markets and tiny stores finding things. You should see the record player that Dylan found."

"A record player for vinyls?" From his tone Jim's clearly surprised.

"Yeah, Jack before he was The Jack McKay high finance from the 80s well in the 70s he used to like music he's got everything from Hendrix, The Beatles, The Doors, Sinatra, it's a great collection."

"Jim do you remember sitting for hours listening to a whole record, you couldn't dance too wild in case the needle bounced?"

He smiles at Cindy, "yeah I do. There was no skipping song's you enjoyed the album in full it was a whole story in itself." He turns to me, "after lunch mind if you show me your Dad's collection I had some of those bands in mine it would be great to see which records you have?"

"Sure."

After lunch Brenda and Cindy walk the beach, and Jim and I disappear inside to go through Jack's collection. It was a great few hours probably the nicest few Jim and I have had together since before Baja Junior year. We listened to the songs and occasionally he'd tell me about seeing the band play or where he heard the record for the first time. It was great but it made me wish I had had this moment with my Dad. I'd have liked to know why he bought the record and what his favourite track was of each of them.

It was this melancholy thought that played in my head as Bren and I walked the twins on the beach before we left for dinner. Jim and Cindy were back at the house getting ready for dinner and the play afterwards.

"You okay?" I move my focus from watching Shadow sniff a piece of seaweed and look up at her in question. "Your energy has changed."

"My energy? Two phone calls with Iris this week and you are now talking about energy." I aim for teasing to deter from having to answer she just lifts her brow- she knows me too well, I pick up her hand and kiss it drawing strength. "Your dad and I had a good well an amazing few hours together today, it just made me wish I got more moments like that with Jack."

The dog's pull on their leads so we begin to walk again. "I used to want your Dad to… well when Jack was on the run and in prison I wanted your Dad to want me to be truly a part of the family, I wanted him to see me as another son. Jack those day's I spent with him before his death, I learned to be comfortable being his son, I learned that he was trying to be a good man. I just wish I had more time getting to know that man, the one I had in my childhood."

She's quiet as I speak and even when I'm finished she doesn't say anything. She just squeezes my hand and keeps walking alongside me. That's the thing about Bren she knew that she couldn't make it better, there were no words, pretending to be somewhere else or physical distraction that would take away that loss. It would never be taken away but she would just hold my hand as I went through it, she'd hold my hand as the waves of grief would crash against me. She'd be like the pillars of our pier she'd stay strong and hold me up when I struggled to do that.

She'd be like Jack's arms when I first went in the big wave's- she'd never let me fall.