The Yippin Yappo

as recorded by Taiyang Xiao Long

Those who live most anywhere have to fear something getting inside their home. From bugs and small animals to Grimm and intruders, there is always a reason to keep one's doors locked when nighttime falls and going to sleep. For a particular father, he knew there was more.

His young daughter was adventurous, and loved to play outside. She would run through the woods and dig holes in the yard, finding all manner of sticks to wield like swords. She was so excitable and adventurous that her father had to keep reminding her to lock the front door when she came inside for the night, lest something sneak its way in. The girl, however, ignored her father, and continued to leave it unlocked. Whether it was repeated forgetfulness or her daring nature welcoming any dangers he could not say, but finally he warned her sternly:

"Young lady, I will tell you only one more time to lock the door when you come inside at night. There are creatures that love unlocked doors, but none more so than the Yippin Yappo. It sneaks outside of houses with unlocked doors, and loves eating up small boys and girls."

Try as he might, the father's warning fell on his daughter's deaf ears. She payed no mind to such a ridiculous tale, and continued to ignore his warnings.

One night, after climbing trees and building stick forts, the girl was called inside from playing. She came inside and washed her face and brushed her teeth, getting into pajamas and getting ready for sleep. Her father kissed her goodnight and tucked her in bed, then went to his room to snooze.

The girl stirred only a bit later, thirsty and throat dry. She shuffled out of bed and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water from the sink, chugging it down and ending with a satisfied exhale. As she walked back to her room, she saw the front door unlocked. She shrugged as she passed, deciding she would just let it be. She got back into her bed and snuggled down into the sheets, quickly dozing off into slumber.

A clicking, clattering sound woke up the girl in what felt like the middle of the night. It was extremely dark, so dark she could not see her own hand in front of her face. As she lie there awake, trying to fall back asleep, she heard the floorboard outside her room creak. This may have scared her when she was younger, but she reminded herself that she was a big girl now and the sound was just the change in temperature affecting the wood. She used this excuse again when she heard another creak, closer this time to her bed. As she listened, expecting another, she heard a scraping sound on the wood.

Instantly, her once brave body froze, petrified in fear. The scraping sounded like heavy sharp claws being dragged on the hard wooden floor. An occasional click came, rhythmically like footsteps. The sounds grew ever closer. She thought it was a Grimm, and tried to stay still, not wanting to get its attention. Suddenly, all courage left her soul when she heard words spoken in the blackness of the room:

"Yippin Yappo. Yappo Yippin. You unlocked your door and let me in."

The girl tried to scream or call for her father, but found her body still paralyzed and her mouth without the strength to open. The voice was raspy and gravelly, but clicked on each syllable, as if the speaker was clattering its teeth in anticipation. To the girl's horror, she felt a pressure on her bed, down near her feet. The covers shifted and the blankets bunched up, as a rather large weight pressed down on the bed. The scraping and clicking had stopped, instead replaced by muffled movement.

"Yippin Yappo. Yappo Yapeet. I think I might eat your tasty feet."

The girl could do no more than shudder at the threat, still not finding the strength to move. She tried again to cry out, but only a stuttering breath came out. She waited for the voice to make good on its promise, but was even more horrified when the pressure moved further upwards and onto her legs. She could feel sharp points poking at her skin through the blankets.

"Yippin Yappo. Yappo Yapees. I think I might eat your tasty knees."

Again time seemed to stand still as the creature paused at her legs. However, every moment it got worse, especially when the presence continued upwards to her torso.

"Yippin Yappo. Yappo Yapput. I think I might eat your tasty gut."

The girl managed to squeeze her eyes closed, feeling tears in them while the rest of her body tingled with numbness. The other parts may have been unfavorable to lose, but if the voice decided to stop there, she would surely die. The voice was now accompanied by raspy breathing, and the continued clicking of sharp teeth, literally chomping at the bit to be used. The blankets shifted again, and the creature moved even higher up her defenseless body.

"Yippin Yappo. Yappo Yappart. I think I might eat your tasty heart."

Out of the edge of her vision, the girl could make out the faint shape of a wolf-sized silhouette, hunched above her. She saw what looked like matted black fur, a slender long body, and four legs tipped with absolutely massive claws. On its head were either large pointed ears or straight, sharp horns; in the darkness she could not tell. Suddenly the head lifted up, revealing two red glowing eyes. A sound finally came from the girl's mouth, but it was only a pained frightened gasp. If the monster had not known she was awake before, it certainly did now.

As if called by her acknowledgment of it, the creature shifted forward, crawling menacingly closer to the girl's terrified face. Finally it stopped just above. The girl could feel its weight on her stomach and its sharp claws poking at her arms. Worst of all, it was now staring right into her eyes, revealing a mouth of razor-sharp teeth turned up to look like a strained, unnaturally large grin. The teeth parted, revealing a pitch black maw that was somehow even darker than the moonless night. It chattered its teeth, rasping its foul breath, as it spoke yet one more time:

"Yippin Yappo. Yappo Yappos. I think I might eat your tasty nose."

The creature stared for only a moment. Without any time to react or even to think, the creature threw its head down and chomped onto her nose. There was a sickly crunching and squelching as her sense of smell was enveloped by the smell of rotten meat and fresh blood. The immense pain broke her silence and paralysis as the young girl screamed and wailed, flailing her ams and kicking her legs as the monster crunched and tore. It yanked away, hissing and clicking, then jumped down off of the bed. The sound of the father's footsteps echoed as he charged to his daughter's bedroom and turned on the light, only just enough to see a slinking black figure rush past his legs and down the hall with unnatural speed. It clicked and it growled as it made for the door, in what almost sounded like mad giggling. It pushed the unlocked door open and fled into the night, gone before the father could even give chase.

The father rushed to the side of his weeping daughter, crying and clutching her face. There was a bloody wound where her nose used to be, and she shrieked from the pain and the fear. Between her sobs, she could only manage to say one thing:

"Yippin Yappo!"

Despite the horrible thing that had happened, the girl luckily survived. Her face was scarred for a while, but soon she was able to get surgery where they rebuilt her missing nose. The father even went out to search for the creature, but found no sign it was ever there aside from a few scratches in the wood floor. The girl would continue to grow up and play, but forever would she remember to lock the door when she came in for the night. She and her father never again dealt with anything in the house, and never again heard or saw the monster.

So remember: lock doors and actively work to keep yourself safe. For if you leave your doors unlocked, and wake in the night to hear infernal rhyming, the Yippin Yappo has come, and you best pray it decides not to eat something you need.

"Goodness. You used to tell your daughters that?"

"I told a watered down version. You should have heard the version my dad told me; he made it even more violent."

"I see. Did they ever leave the doors unlocked?"

"Not even once."