JENNIE
Lisa's head is heavy on my stomach when the sound of my phone vibrating on the table wakes me up. I lift her gently, as gently as I can, and retrieve the annoying object. The screen flashes with my mother's name, and I groan before answering it.
"Ruby Jane?" my mother chimes through the receiver. "Yes."
"Where are you, and what time will you be here?" she asks. "I'm not coming there," I tell her.
"It's Christmas Eve, Jennie, I know you are upset over this thing with your father, but you need to spend Christmas with me. You shouldn't be at some hotel alone."
I do feel slightly guilty for not spending the holidays with my mother. She isn't the nicest woman, but I'm all she has. Still, I say, "I'm not driving all the way there, Mother. It's snowing out and I don't want to be there."
Lisa stirs and lifts her head. Just as I'm about to tell her not to speak, she opens her mouth. "What's wrong?" she says, and I hear my mother gasp.
"Jennie Ruby Jane Kim! What are you thinking?" she shouts. "Mother, I'm not doing this right now."
"That's her, isn't it? I know that voice!"
This is a terrible way to wake up. I move Lisa off me and sit up, covering my naked body with the blanket. "I am getting off the phone now, Mother."
"Don't you dare hang—"
But I do hang up. And then put my phone on silent. I knew she would find out sooner or later; I was just hoping it would be later. "Well, she knows we're back to doing . . . us. She heard you, and now she's freaking out," I say and hold my phone up to her to show the two calls from her in the past minute.
She curls around behind me. "You knew she would, so really it's almost better that she found out this way."
"Not really. I could have told her instead of her just hearing you in the background."
She shrugs. "It's the same thing. She would've been mad either way." "Still." I'm slightly annoyed by her reaction. I know she doesn't care for her, but she's still my mother, and I didn't want her to find out like this. "You could be a little nicer about the whole thing."
She nods and says, "Sorry."
I expected her to have a rude comeback, so that was a pleasant surprise.
Lisa smiles and pulls me back down to her. "Would you like me to make you some breakfast, Daisy?"
"Daisy?" I raise my eyebrow.
"It's early, and I'm not at my best to quote literature, but you're grumpy, so . . . I called you Daisy."
"Daisy Buchanan wasn't grumpy. And neither am I." I harrumph, but can't help smiling.
She laughs. "Yes, you are. And how do you know which Daisy I'm talking about?"
"There are only a few, and I know you well enough." "Is that so?"
"Yes, and your attempt at insulting me failed miserably," I tease. "Yeah . . . Yeah . . . Mrs. Bennet," she fires back.
"I assume that since you said Mrs., you are talking about the mother, not Elizabeth, which means you are trying to call me obnoxious. Then again, you have been off this morning, so maybe you're saying I'm charming? I just don't know with you anymore." I smile.
"All right . . . all right . . . Christ." She laughs. "Someone make one bad joke around here and she's condemned."
My earlier irritation dissolves as we continue our banter and climb out of bed. Lisa says to stay in pajamas, since we aren't leaving the house.
It's a strange idea to me, though. If I were at my mother's house, I would be expected to be dressed in my Sunday best.
"You could just wear that shirt." She points to her T-shirt on the floor.
I smile and pick it up, pulling it over me and putting on sweatpants. I don't remember hanging out with Kai in sweats, ever. I didn't wear much makeup until recently, but I was always dressed nicely. I wonder what Kai would have thought if I'd shown up to spend time with him dressed like this. It's funny, I always thought I was comfortable around Kai, thought I was myself around him because he knew me for so long, when in reality he doesn't know me at all. He doesn't know the real me, the me that Lisa has made me comfortable enough to show.
"Ready?" Lisa asks.
I nod and pull my hair back into a messy bun. I switch my phone off and leave it on the dresser, then follow Lisa out into the living room. The delicious scent of coffee fills the apartment, and we find Chit standing in front of the stove flipping pancakes.
She smiles and turns to us. "Merry Christmas!"
"It's not Christmas," Lisa says, and I shoot her a glare. She rolls her eyes, then smiles at her mother. I pour myself a cup of coffee and thank Chit for making breakfast. Lisa and I sit at the table while she tells us the story of how her grandmother taught her how to make this type of pancakes. Lisa listens intently and even smiles a little.
As we start to eat our breakfast of delicious raspberry pancakes, Chit asks, "Are we going to be opening gifts today? Since I assume you'll be at your mum's tomorrow?"
I don't know how to answer her exactly, and I start to fumble for words. "I am . . . actually I am . . . I told—"
"She's going to Dad's house tomorrow. She promised Jisoo that she would, and she's really the only friend she's got, so she can't cancel," Lisa interjects.
I'm thankful for the assist, but calling me Jisoo's only friend is kind of mean . . . Well, maybe I am. But she's my only friend as well.
"Oh . . . that's fine. Honey, you don't need to be afraid to tell me things like that. I have no problem with you spending time with Marco," Chit says, and I can't tell which one of us she's speaking to.
Lisa shakes her head. "I'm not going. I told Jennie to tell them we said no."
Chit stops midbite. "'We'? They invited me?" Her voice is full of surprise.
"Yeah . . . They wanted both of you to come," I explain. "Why?" she asks.
"I . . . don't know . . ." I say. Honestly, I don't. Karen is so kind, and I know she really wants to mend what is broken between her husband and his daughter, so that's the only explanation I have.
"I already said no. Don't worry about it, Mum."
Chit finishes her forkful and chews thoughtfully. "No, maybe we should go," she says at last, surprising both me and Lisa.
"Why would you want to go there?" Lisa asks and scowls.
"I don't know . . . the last time I saw your father was almost ten years ago. I think I owe it to myself and to him to see how he's turned his life around. Also, I know you don't want to be away from Jennie for Christmas." "I could stay here," I say. I don't want to cancel on them, but I don't want Chit to feel like she has to go.
"No, really. It's fine. We should go—all of us." "You're sure?" The worry in Lisa's voice is evident.
"Yeah . . . it won't be so bad." She smiles. "Besides, if Kathy taught Jennie how to make those cookies, imagine how good the food will be."
"Karen, Mum—her name's Karen."
"Hey, she's my ex-husband's new wife, who I'm spending Christmas with. I can call her whatever I want." She laughs and I join her.
"I'll tell Jisoo we're all coming," I say and go to grab my phone. I'd never have imagined that my Christmas would be spent with Lisa and her family—both sides of her family. The last few months have been anything but what I expected.
When I turn on my phone I have three voicemails, from my mother, I'm sure. I ignore them and dial Jisoo.
"Hey, Jennie, Merry Christmas Eve!" she greets me, cheery as ever. I can picture her warm smile.
"Merry Christmas Eve, Jennie."
"Thanks! First things first—you're not calling to bail, are you?"
"No, of course not. Quite the opposite, actually. I was calling to make sure it was still okay if Lisa and Chit came over tomorrow?"
"Really? They want to?" "Yeah . . ."
"Does this mean you and Lisa . . ." "Yeah . . . I know I'm an idiot . . ."
"I didn't say that," she says.
"I know, but you're thinking it—"
"No. I am not. We can talk about it tomorrow, but you aren't an idiot, Jennie."
"Thank you," I tell her and mean it. She's the only person who won't have a negative opinion on this subject.
"I'll tell my mom they're coming. She'll be thrilled," she says before we hang up.
When I join Lisa and Chit back in the living room, they already have their presents on their laps, and there are two boxes on the couch that I assume are for me.
"Me first!" Chit says and tears the snowflake-printed paper off of a box. Her smile is huge as she takes out the tracksuit I got her. "I love these! How did you know?" She points to the gray one she's wearing.
"I'm not very good at buying gifts," I tell her.
She giggles. "Don't be silly, it's lovely," she assures me while opening the second box. After she has a moment to see what's inside, she squeezes Lisa tight and then holds up a necklace that says Mom, just like she told me. She seems to like the thick scarf she bought her as well.
I really wish I'd gotten Lisa something. I knew all along that I would go back to her, and I think she knew it, too. She hasn't mentioned that she got me one, and both of the boxes on my lap say they're from Chit, so that's a huge relief.
Lisa is next, and she gives her mother her best fake smile when she opens the clothes she bought her. One piece is a red long-sleeved shirt; I try to picture Lisa wearing anything other than black and white, but I can't.
"Your turn," she says to me.
I smile nervously and pull the sparkly bow off of the first gift. Clearly, Chit is better at choosing women's clothing than men's; the pastel-yellow dress in the box proves it. It's a light baby-doll style, and I love it.
"Thank you—it's beautiful," I say and give her a hug. I really appreciate her thinking of me. She just met me, but she's been so loving and welcoming that I feel as if I've known her much longer.
The second box is much smaller than the first, but the amount of tape used to wrap it makes it very difficult to open. When I finally tear through the packaging, I find a bracelet—a sort of charm bracelet unlike anything I've seen before. Chit is so thoughtful, just like her daughter. I lift it up and run my fingers along the rope-textured string to look at the charms. There are only three, each bigger than my thumbnail, two made from what looks like pewter, the other solid white . . . porcelain, maybe? The white charm is an infinity symbol, the ends shaped like hearts. Just like the tattoo on Lisa's wrist. I glance up at her, my eyes moving immediately to her tattoo. She shifts and I look back to the bracelet. The second charm is a music note, and the third, slightly larger than the other two, is in the shape of a book. When I turn the book charm in my fingers, I notice something written on the back. It says:
Whatever our souls are made of, her and mine are the same.
I look up at Lisa and swallow the tears threatening to form. Her mother didn't get me this.
She did.