Dave unconsciously bit his lower lip as he looked around the small trailer.
There was the same old couch that he had remembered; a TV that looked like
it was from the late 70's, a knitted blanket hung over the back of the
couch… how was it that this place hadn't changed?
"Can I get you anything?"
"Huh?" Dave turned to face Snow Hawk.
She glanced about, for a moment wondering what had caught his attention in the small trailer. "I said 'can I get you anything?'"
"Oh, uh… no, no I'm fine…" he let his eyes wander over the photographs of Sandra and her family as memories flooded back. Even the smell of this trailer reminded him of a thousand memories that he had long since forgotten.
Snow Hawk watched him curiously for a moment. "What is it?"
Dave looked back at her and let his eyes linger on her inquisitive face for a moment before answering. "It's just that… everything's the same."
Snow Hawk looked around. "No." She stepped up to the toaster. "We got this just last year. It has room for four pieces of bread at once," she joked, pretending to be serious. It worked. Dave laughed; she had always been able to make him laugh.
He leaned towards the window and gently pushed back the blinds to see out. Comanche and Cody were still playing happily.
"Shining Eyes, are you okay?"
He was surprised at the serious concern written on her face. "What do you mean?"
"I mean… you haven't come back for twelve years then all of a sudden you show up all bruised and battered. Is there something wrong? Why'd you come back?"
Dave fought his urge to look at the ground. Instead his eyes conveyed what Snow Hawk thought was a desperate plea for help, just for a moment before he turned away.
Suddenly uncomfortable she changed the subject. "You look more Indian now."
"What?" She thought that Dave's voice sounded a bit distant. She still couldn't see his face as he was turned away from her.
"You, uh, you've grown up. You look more Sioux." There was definitely something wrong.
"Sandra, I'm half Italian," he turned and gave her that half- incredulous smile.
"And you're a quarter Lakota," there was no playfulness in her voice. Why was he being so difficult? She was just trying to kid around. "I don't know what happened to you in Chicago but it seems to have affected your hearing. My name's Snow Hawk."
Dave could hardly catch up with the sudden turn of atmosphere. "Well I don't know what's happened to you here to make you forget what a shit- filled life it is on the rez. Why the hell do you think you can talk to me like that? Just because you changed your name to something that completely doesn't make sense means that you can get all righteously 'Indian' on me all the sudden? Wake up Sandra. Being Lakota means being a drunken, pathetic excuse for a human being so depressed about what happened to your ancestors that you can't see straight enough to realize that you have to change-" he was cut off by a sharp slap to the face. He didn't know where his sudden anger had come from but it was gone as soon as her saw the frustration and tears brimming in her eyes.
"How dare you speak of my people like that," she tried not to growl but was unsuccessful.
"That's right," Dave got the courage to speak after a moment. "Your. And it's David. David Malucci. Not Shining Eyes or some other adjective and noun thrown together." He realized that his breathing had quickened with anger as the two stared each other down.
"I think you better go," Snow Hawk whispered, pointing to the door.
"Yah… yah, I think I should." Dave threw her one last glare before opening the door and leaving. She watched from the doorway as Dave stalked over to Comanche. "Come here Comanche." The puppy ignored him. "Comanche, come!" If the little guy had ears he sure wasn't using them. Without thinking Dave bent down to pick up the little dog- a little too quickly. He winced in pain and froze for a moment as his side exploded in fire.
Watching from the doorway of her trailer Snow Hawk's eyebrows furrowed slightly at his strange body language.
He picked up Comanche and left, disappearing behind some trees.
She called to Cody. When he friend was inside with her she shut the screen door and turned away, fighting the tears that were spilling out over her cheeks.
"Of all the nerve," Dave was muttering to himself as he stalked off with his protesting puppy in his arms. "Who does she think she is talking to me like that? She has no idea who I am." He finally stopped at the meadow where he had been relaxing earlier. He walked to the place where he had sat, briefly toying with the idea of reassuming his meditative stance in the sun. "What the hell," he gently sat down, Comanche finally calmed from Dave's gentle scratching of his ears. The puppy sat in his lap, closing his eyes sleepily. Not knowing where else to go Dave also closed his eyes, letting the sun dance across his face. He felt his mind lowly becoming sluggish as the constant beat of his puppy's heart and his own exhaustion from pain began to call him to sleep.
He was in the woods. There were towering pines everywhere, skirted by smaller, leafy shrubs. He shivered as a chill suddenly went through his body. Mist seemed to slowly creep down through the tree trunks, stretching its tendrils in every direction as is testing the area before proceeding. A sound sliced through the crisp air, igniting within him the same internal call if the wild. Stretching over every melancholy note human ears are able to receive, the call wailed, unwavering. Dave wished he could answer the call, every fiber in his body willed a returning answer to rip forth from his chest and answer with all of his pain, sorrow, guilt, grief, pain and remorse. His shattered dreams. The person he could have been. Yet the call would not come. He reached inside himself to find it but it danced just beyond the shadows. He heard something approaching through the foliage ahead of him.
Dave jerked his eyes open as he felt something brush against his face. He quickly looked about in the meadow but saw nothing. He looked down to his puppy who was just beginning to stretch and shift in his cross-legged lap. The adrenaline he had felt slowly subsiding he looked about again. There was nothing, save the hum of insects and the sporadic squawks of birds. Thinking that it might very well have been just an insect Dave slowly got up, his healing ribs groaning slightly at the action. He moaned lowly as he stretched, holding Comanche with one arm. He looked town to the smashed grass where he had been sitting. There was fresh dirt nearby from a prairie dog or gopher hole. Yet something about the dirt caught his eye. He leaned in closer. There was a footprint. The footprint of a large canis. He crouched, examining it more before Comanche began to squirm. He let the puppy down and no sooner had his paws touched the ground was he off after a butterfly. Glancing once more at the footprint Dave turned to follow Comanche. Hopefully his grandparents were home right now. If not he'd call Abby. He'd promised her he would.
Taking in a deep breath he pushed all thoughts of his dream aside and tried not to think of his earlier conversation with Sandra- Snow Hawk.
Silent, wild eyes watched his retreating form from the cover of the realm that separated the two.
"Can I get you anything?"
"Huh?" Dave turned to face Snow Hawk.
She glanced about, for a moment wondering what had caught his attention in the small trailer. "I said 'can I get you anything?'"
"Oh, uh… no, no I'm fine…" he let his eyes wander over the photographs of Sandra and her family as memories flooded back. Even the smell of this trailer reminded him of a thousand memories that he had long since forgotten.
Snow Hawk watched him curiously for a moment. "What is it?"
Dave looked back at her and let his eyes linger on her inquisitive face for a moment before answering. "It's just that… everything's the same."
Snow Hawk looked around. "No." She stepped up to the toaster. "We got this just last year. It has room for four pieces of bread at once," she joked, pretending to be serious. It worked. Dave laughed; she had always been able to make him laugh.
He leaned towards the window and gently pushed back the blinds to see out. Comanche and Cody were still playing happily.
"Shining Eyes, are you okay?"
He was surprised at the serious concern written on her face. "What do you mean?"
"I mean… you haven't come back for twelve years then all of a sudden you show up all bruised and battered. Is there something wrong? Why'd you come back?"
Dave fought his urge to look at the ground. Instead his eyes conveyed what Snow Hawk thought was a desperate plea for help, just for a moment before he turned away.
Suddenly uncomfortable she changed the subject. "You look more Indian now."
"What?" She thought that Dave's voice sounded a bit distant. She still couldn't see his face as he was turned away from her.
"You, uh, you've grown up. You look more Sioux." There was definitely something wrong.
"Sandra, I'm half Italian," he turned and gave her that half- incredulous smile.
"And you're a quarter Lakota," there was no playfulness in her voice. Why was he being so difficult? She was just trying to kid around. "I don't know what happened to you in Chicago but it seems to have affected your hearing. My name's Snow Hawk."
Dave could hardly catch up with the sudden turn of atmosphere. "Well I don't know what's happened to you here to make you forget what a shit- filled life it is on the rez. Why the hell do you think you can talk to me like that? Just because you changed your name to something that completely doesn't make sense means that you can get all righteously 'Indian' on me all the sudden? Wake up Sandra. Being Lakota means being a drunken, pathetic excuse for a human being so depressed about what happened to your ancestors that you can't see straight enough to realize that you have to change-" he was cut off by a sharp slap to the face. He didn't know where his sudden anger had come from but it was gone as soon as her saw the frustration and tears brimming in her eyes.
"How dare you speak of my people like that," she tried not to growl but was unsuccessful.
"That's right," Dave got the courage to speak after a moment. "Your. And it's David. David Malucci. Not Shining Eyes or some other adjective and noun thrown together." He realized that his breathing had quickened with anger as the two stared each other down.
"I think you better go," Snow Hawk whispered, pointing to the door.
"Yah… yah, I think I should." Dave threw her one last glare before opening the door and leaving. She watched from the doorway as Dave stalked over to Comanche. "Come here Comanche." The puppy ignored him. "Comanche, come!" If the little guy had ears he sure wasn't using them. Without thinking Dave bent down to pick up the little dog- a little too quickly. He winced in pain and froze for a moment as his side exploded in fire.
Watching from the doorway of her trailer Snow Hawk's eyebrows furrowed slightly at his strange body language.
He picked up Comanche and left, disappearing behind some trees.
She called to Cody. When he friend was inside with her she shut the screen door and turned away, fighting the tears that were spilling out over her cheeks.
"Of all the nerve," Dave was muttering to himself as he stalked off with his protesting puppy in his arms. "Who does she think she is talking to me like that? She has no idea who I am." He finally stopped at the meadow where he had been relaxing earlier. He walked to the place where he had sat, briefly toying with the idea of reassuming his meditative stance in the sun. "What the hell," he gently sat down, Comanche finally calmed from Dave's gentle scratching of his ears. The puppy sat in his lap, closing his eyes sleepily. Not knowing where else to go Dave also closed his eyes, letting the sun dance across his face. He felt his mind lowly becoming sluggish as the constant beat of his puppy's heart and his own exhaustion from pain began to call him to sleep.
He was in the woods. There were towering pines everywhere, skirted by smaller, leafy shrubs. He shivered as a chill suddenly went through his body. Mist seemed to slowly creep down through the tree trunks, stretching its tendrils in every direction as is testing the area before proceeding. A sound sliced through the crisp air, igniting within him the same internal call if the wild. Stretching over every melancholy note human ears are able to receive, the call wailed, unwavering. Dave wished he could answer the call, every fiber in his body willed a returning answer to rip forth from his chest and answer with all of his pain, sorrow, guilt, grief, pain and remorse. His shattered dreams. The person he could have been. Yet the call would not come. He reached inside himself to find it but it danced just beyond the shadows. He heard something approaching through the foliage ahead of him.
Dave jerked his eyes open as he felt something brush against his face. He quickly looked about in the meadow but saw nothing. He looked down to his puppy who was just beginning to stretch and shift in his cross-legged lap. The adrenaline he had felt slowly subsiding he looked about again. There was nothing, save the hum of insects and the sporadic squawks of birds. Thinking that it might very well have been just an insect Dave slowly got up, his healing ribs groaning slightly at the action. He moaned lowly as he stretched, holding Comanche with one arm. He looked town to the smashed grass where he had been sitting. There was fresh dirt nearby from a prairie dog or gopher hole. Yet something about the dirt caught his eye. He leaned in closer. There was a footprint. The footprint of a large canis. He crouched, examining it more before Comanche began to squirm. He let the puppy down and no sooner had his paws touched the ground was he off after a butterfly. Glancing once more at the footprint Dave turned to follow Comanche. Hopefully his grandparents were home right now. If not he'd call Abby. He'd promised her he would.
Taking in a deep breath he pushed all thoughts of his dream aside and tried not to think of his earlier conversation with Sandra- Snow Hawk.
Silent, wild eyes watched his retreating form from the cover of the realm that separated the two.