AN- Thanks again for the reviews. I really appreciate them. I'm still
trying to find a take off point, but I'm getting there now. I even kinda
know what I'm doing. :) Oh, by the way. I *am* Australian, so I don't know
my American phrases or places that well (or even at all)…and its hard to
get me to change my grammar, like write 'mom' or 'mommy' instead of 'mum'
or 'mummy' (personally I do like the O version better, but…its still hard
to change the 16 years of training.) Bear with me.
*****************************
When I woke up this morning, I thought that last night was all a dream. That is, until I rolled over to find Cordelia lying next to me. Then all the events of last night flooded back to me.
At first I didn't know what to do. I'd had a major breakthrough on the road to the new me, but I'm no longer in denial. Not at all. Every tiny detail of what could go wrong with (and all the negative points to) my future with Cordelia and this baby play in my head. I'm having what is commonly known as cold feet, when Cordy sighs contentedly and snuggles her head against my chest. Immediately I start to think of what could go right with (and all the positive points to) my future with my family.
My family. How strange does that sound? But I know that it's right.
Cordelia's eyes open., and she lifts her head to look up at me. "Hey." She greets me sleepily.
"Hey." I reply softly. "You're still here this time."
She smiles. "I shouldn't be." The look on my face must have spoken for me 'cos she adds, "I mean, I've still got Angel's car."
"Oh." I lighten up a bit. " He's gonna hate me even more now, isn't he?"
"Yup."
I kiss her forehead. "I guess you're gonna leave soon then."
"Yeah. I've got to try to smooth things over with him…and its gonna take even more work *now*."
I can't help smiling. I watch as she gets up and makes her way around my apartment, gathering up her clothes and stuff. "I would have thought that he'd try calling you or something."
She picks up her cell phone. And reads out loud "17 missed calls. What's the bet he did?"
I smile again, slyly. "Were we really so loud that you didn't hear it ring?"
"Probably. Unless it was still set to vibrate. Soo not as kinky as it sounds." She replies and walks back into my room, now almost fully dressed. She's wearing the same denim mini skirt and red tank top as last night.
I've already gotten up and thrown on some clothes. I walk over to her and kiss her softly. "Do you want breakfast?"
"Sorry, I can't. I've really gotta run. I hope he doesn't kill me." She laughs. "I know he won't but the longer that I leave it…"
"I know."
We stand in silence for a minute before I ask, "Did you really want me to move in with you?"
"Uh, maybe after a few weeks? I've still gotta talk it over with Dennis and we don't even know if *we're* gonna work yet and-"
I cut her off. "That's what I thought. I was actually thinking we do it after a few months to be sure we're not making the biggest mistake of our lives."
"Haven't we already done that?" She mumbles.
I don't know how to reply. "If none of that happened Cordy, we probably wouldn't have found each other." I say, taking her into my arms.
She smiles up at me. "When did *you* get all mushy?" She pulls away and we start walking down the hall.
"I don't know. Like I said, I've been trying to change." I tell her.
"Well, you've obviously been trying hard 'cos…wow. Big change." She pauses. "Its good though."
"I'm trying to be."
We're standing at the front door now. "I'll call you." She tells me, and kisses me on the cheek. I open the door for her and watch her walk down the hall, before closing it.
I look at my answering machine. 5 messages. I press play and listen to each one. The first is from my mom, the next from my sister. The one after is from my best friend in Boston, and the fourth is a girl who I exchanged numbers with the other week. (Don't worry, I'm *not* going to call her back.) The fifth message, however, gets my attention from the word go.
"Hello Lindsey. It's Lilah." (I knew who it was. I spent enough time with the evil bitch to know the sound of her voice.) "How did we get your new number? Oh, you already know how we do stuff like this, so lets cut to the chase. We know your back in town and the senior partners aren't happy. You've been seen with Angel and his crew and we're afraid you're giving away confidential information like last time. Of course, if you do what they want, we *won't* kill you."(Yeah, right. Is she forgetting that I used to work there? I know their methods. They'll kill me either way.) She laughs cruelly and adds, "Oh, the floor show tonight was pretty good, gave us a few laughs…You and that Cordelia chick, huh?" She laughs again and hangs up.
Oh, God. They've got my apartment bugged. That and they're trying to kill me. So much for *not* effecting my kid's life.
I've got to warn Cordy and Angel. (Angel. Urgh. I still don't like him. I hate admitting that I need his help, but I can't protect Cordy by myself. They will go after her too, y'know. Especially once they find everything out.) I grab my keys from the kitchen counter and run out the door. Things just keep getting more and more complicated.
*****************************
When I woke up this morning, I thought that last night was all a dream. That is, until I rolled over to find Cordelia lying next to me. Then all the events of last night flooded back to me.
At first I didn't know what to do. I'd had a major breakthrough on the road to the new me, but I'm no longer in denial. Not at all. Every tiny detail of what could go wrong with (and all the negative points to) my future with Cordelia and this baby play in my head. I'm having what is commonly known as cold feet, when Cordy sighs contentedly and snuggles her head against my chest. Immediately I start to think of what could go right with (and all the positive points to) my future with my family.
My family. How strange does that sound? But I know that it's right.
Cordelia's eyes open., and she lifts her head to look up at me. "Hey." She greets me sleepily.
"Hey." I reply softly. "You're still here this time."
She smiles. "I shouldn't be." The look on my face must have spoken for me 'cos she adds, "I mean, I've still got Angel's car."
"Oh." I lighten up a bit. " He's gonna hate me even more now, isn't he?"
"Yup."
I kiss her forehead. "I guess you're gonna leave soon then."
"Yeah. I've got to try to smooth things over with him…and its gonna take even more work *now*."
I can't help smiling. I watch as she gets up and makes her way around my apartment, gathering up her clothes and stuff. "I would have thought that he'd try calling you or something."
She picks up her cell phone. And reads out loud "17 missed calls. What's the bet he did?"
I smile again, slyly. "Were we really so loud that you didn't hear it ring?"
"Probably. Unless it was still set to vibrate. Soo not as kinky as it sounds." She replies and walks back into my room, now almost fully dressed. She's wearing the same denim mini skirt and red tank top as last night.
I've already gotten up and thrown on some clothes. I walk over to her and kiss her softly. "Do you want breakfast?"
"Sorry, I can't. I've really gotta run. I hope he doesn't kill me." She laughs. "I know he won't but the longer that I leave it…"
"I know."
We stand in silence for a minute before I ask, "Did you really want me to move in with you?"
"Uh, maybe after a few weeks? I've still gotta talk it over with Dennis and we don't even know if *we're* gonna work yet and-"
I cut her off. "That's what I thought. I was actually thinking we do it after a few months to be sure we're not making the biggest mistake of our lives."
"Haven't we already done that?" She mumbles.
I don't know how to reply. "If none of that happened Cordy, we probably wouldn't have found each other." I say, taking her into my arms.
She smiles up at me. "When did *you* get all mushy?" She pulls away and we start walking down the hall.
"I don't know. Like I said, I've been trying to change." I tell her.
"Well, you've obviously been trying hard 'cos…wow. Big change." She pauses. "Its good though."
"I'm trying to be."
We're standing at the front door now. "I'll call you." She tells me, and kisses me on the cheek. I open the door for her and watch her walk down the hall, before closing it.
I look at my answering machine. 5 messages. I press play and listen to each one. The first is from my mom, the next from my sister. The one after is from my best friend in Boston, and the fourth is a girl who I exchanged numbers with the other week. (Don't worry, I'm *not* going to call her back.) The fifth message, however, gets my attention from the word go.
"Hello Lindsey. It's Lilah." (I knew who it was. I spent enough time with the evil bitch to know the sound of her voice.) "How did we get your new number? Oh, you already know how we do stuff like this, so lets cut to the chase. We know your back in town and the senior partners aren't happy. You've been seen with Angel and his crew and we're afraid you're giving away confidential information like last time. Of course, if you do what they want, we *won't* kill you."(Yeah, right. Is she forgetting that I used to work there? I know their methods. They'll kill me either way.) She laughs cruelly and adds, "Oh, the floor show tonight was pretty good, gave us a few laughs…You and that Cordelia chick, huh?" She laughs again and hangs up.
Oh, God. They've got my apartment bugged. That and they're trying to kill me. So much for *not* effecting my kid's life.
I've got to warn Cordy and Angel. (Angel. Urgh. I still don't like him. I hate admitting that I need his help, but I can't protect Cordy by myself. They will go after her too, y'know. Especially once they find everything out.) I grab my keys from the kitchen counter and run out the door. Things just keep getting more and more complicated.