Chapter Nineteen: Escape to Fali

Dib, in spite of his vow to keep watch on Zim, fell asleep on the ground, and had to be woken up.

"Ika! Ika! Get Mel and get the heck out of here!"

"W-what?!"

"The Irken military officials are checking up on this camp to see if I'm doing an adequate job! If they find you two, you'll be killed!"

"When are they coming?"

"It's a surprise check-up! They're here!"

"Mel! Mel, get up!" Dib leapt to his feet and shook her. She wouldn't move. "Zim! I bet it was that operation of yours! She isn't moving!"

"She's probably just unconscious because of the adjustment! Carry her out of here!"

"Where are we gonna go?"

"Get to my base! I have an extra Voot for emergencies that you can take, because it wouldn't be long before they came and found you there!"

"Where do we go?"

"Anywhere but Earth!" Zim shouted as Dib tried to carry Mel. After a moment, he asked, "Well? What's the hold-up?"

"I can't carry Mel by myself and get away in time."

"Oh, geez, can't you do one simple task?"

"Just help me!"

"All right!" They were knocked to their feet from the vibrations of a landing vehicle that was obviously much larger than a Voot Runner. "No time! I've got to greet them so they don't know what's happening! There's no way you can escape now--you'll have to find a place to hide."

"Where?"

"That metal box should escape most scanners they have to detect hidden people. Hide in it." Zim pointed to a box in the corner and left the tent to greet the officials. Dib was unsure that it would fit both of them. He tried to configure Mel and himself in such a way that they might fit, but it was no use.

"There's only room for one of us, Mel. Which one of us will be saved?" Though he didn't particularly want to be killed, he couldn't be so cruel as to take the hiding place himself and selfishly leave an unconscious Mel lying on the floor, just waiting to be discovered by Irken officials. While he knew the inevitable decision, he wanted to hesitate just enough to the point where it seemed like he might get out with his life. During this time, he thought of what Mel had said in a fight with him as she described him wanting to defeat Zim for personal gain and nothing more: 'You may have saved lives, Dib, but believe me: you are no hero.' Finally, he knew he had to make a noble sacrifice. "The next time you see me, I'll be dead. Goodbye." Setting her down gently in the box, Dib closed the lid and stood, facing the tent opening, thus facing death.

"And here is--Dib! What are you doing here?!"

"Then you mean this Falen is an intruder and not an assistant of yours?" the Irken official asked.

"No, of course he is! I just thought he was out on a search with my other men, looking for other surviving humans."

"Hmm...lack of control, unaware of the location of his personnel, generally doesn't handle surprise well...and...that's it. Inspection is over. Good day, sir."

"Good day...sir..." the ship took off once more, and Zim shouted at the terrified Falen in anger. "Dib! Why did you have to be out?! I thought I told you to hide!"

"Uh...there wasn't enough room."

"Did you hear those marks on my record?!"

"Yeah, sounds like they're pretty strict. You need to clean up your act and keep tabs on all personnel, and keep control of yourself, not to mention learning how to handle surprise well and--"

"That's enough! Those are serious marks! It could tarnish my record forever!"

"Well, hey, at least they didn't think you were hiding anybody. I bet that could've destroyed your record...heh, heh."

"Not only destroy my record, but kill me!"

"Whoa. Good thing they didn't kill me. I should get Mel out of that box now." Dib helped her out, and she became conscious within a moment's time.

"Hey, Dib, I had the weirdest dream."

"Really? What was it?"

"Well, I was in a Voot Runner with you, and we were on our way to Fali. Zim called us from here on Earth, though, and told us to be careful of attack because the Seraul were near. You thought he was joking, but we were attacked, and it was by the Seraul. We crash-landed on a planet, and you were unconscious as the Seraul descended. They shot us, and that's when I woke up. You were unconscious and we were both killed."

"That won't happen."

"How do you know?"

"I knew that we wouldn't die when Earth was destroyed, didn't I?"

"I guess, but--"

"See? We'll get to Fali. I promise."

"Okay. I trust that."

Zim spoke, "You two had better head on to my base if you want to get to Fali anytime soon. We don't seem to be having much luck on this stink-planet. After all, until the Phantom Wandering stops, we can't build any snack factories or other buildings. Sure, some won't go away, but most of them will stop sooner or later. Right now, though, the planet is in a state of unrest. Hurry, while you still can."

"Thank you, Zim," Mel said. "We'll be leaving."

"Goodbye, Mel, be sure to call me!"

"Of course I will." They darted off, running as fast as they could for fear of being seen and killed, and eventually made it to Zim's base.

"Oh, no, I left the canteen back at the tent!"

"Dib, guess what I've got..."

"I don't know, what?" She grinned deviously. "The canteen?" Nodding her head wildly, she showed it to him, but pulled it back when he tried to grab it. "Come on! I just want a drink!"

"Really? I didn't know you were 21."

"What are you talking about; I'm not 21--oh, I get it. Humorous. Now give me the canteen."

"You didn't say 'please.'"

"Please. Okay, now can I have it?"

"Okay."

"Thank you."

"Five bucks."

"What?! I just want a little sip!"

"A sip?! You'll need to pay up big-time, then, because a sip is ten dollars. It's on sale today, though, so it'll be cheaper."

"Really," he said unenthusiastically. "How much?"

"Free. Here you go; take all you want. It's on me." She handed him the canteen; he drank a little and then handed it back. "So...the school thing...is that still a plan?"

"Sure."

"At least the curriculum will be interesting. School was always boring for me...they didn't really teach me much of anything new, and as far as learning socially...well, I learned that there are a lot of jerks out there. Wouldn't it be great? Making school interesting and teaching students to think instead of just memorize stuff? We'll be teaching them whatever subjects they choose and actually get them involved. It'll be incredibly...incredible!"

"Let's get going. We'll draw up the plans for it when we get back." After a bit of searching, they came across Zim's emergency Voot, which was slightly smaller, and got in.

"Fire it up." He started it up and soon Earth was long gone. Mel got the dreadful feeling in her stomach that she would never see her planet again. Fali...she had a new life ahead of her. In thinking of the planet she left behind, she thought of the alternate reality she had left behind. Her family was still there...they wouldn't know what happened. She hoped that someway, somehow, they would know that she was happy and safe.

"Mel, what classes would there be in the school?"

"Well, you'd have to have parapsychology and astrobiology..."

"Astrobiology?"

"Perhaps you're not familiar with the term, but it means 'the study of star life.' Of course, that's the literal definition. It's really the study of alien life. That'll take research. Let's see...I know of the Irkens, the Falish, the humans, the Meekrob, the Vortians...of those I only know stuff about Irkens and humans."

"You know stuff about one Falen."

"Well, yeah. I know about the Falish prophecy we're involved in, physical characteristics, the Old Language, how names are derived, and how they speak telepathically. Aside from that, I'm not really sure."

"I just remembered...Gir is in the hotel room...by himself...and he's been alone there since I left."

"Oops."

"Oh well. How much trouble can one robot get into, anyway?"

"I wish you didn't say that."

"A lot?"

"Um...yep."

"I kind of figured...but we're alive, at least."

"Yeah...we are, aren't we?"

"Mel, do you think you'll miss Earth?"

"Yeah. I won't particularly miss the people, but I'll miss Earth. I love Earth, just not the majority of humanity."

"If we're going to establish a school and play teacher, we'll need to learn the Old Language. That's what they teach with, I hear."

"Ah, yes. Well, maybe they'll have one of those program things where you just watch it and you'll remember or it teaches you during sleep or something."

"Yeah. Besides, it'll be a while before we can get anything like that set up; it'll require funds, time, and a lesson plan."

"So, you want to be principal?"

"I guess. I don't know. I'm thinking that there won't be just one principal like in Earth schools. We could run it together, as co-principals."

"Yeah, that's a plan. What about teachers? Is anyone on Fali educated about the paranormal? Is it even considered acceptable there?"

"They seemed to be more in tune with that than humans from what I could tell."

"Hmm...you're probably right. Well, in case we can't find other teachers, we'll be the only teachers. That would mean that no more than two classes could be in session at a time, though. Plus, I'll have to teach you about how to teach."

"You think you know enough to teach me?"

"Yeah, sure."

"How?"

"I'm a year older than you, I've been interested in teaching ever since I can remember, and I even have teacher's catalogues at home. Teacher's catalogues! The kind that are mailed only to teachers! I got it from my fourth grade teachers. That was cool."

"Well...I guess that qualifies you."

"And I hardly think you can count having Ms. Bitters for a teacher as experience with teaching. I've gotten really good teachers throughout the years."

"You're lucky. Try having Mrs. Snotz for kindergarten through fifth grade."

"Some horrible teacher, huh?"

"Yeah. Then I get Ms. Bitters...at least I could try to convince the students that Zim's an Irken when she went on a doom lecture."

"See, there's an advantage! You got more time to think rather than just sit around being bored! Actually, I never did any of the class work in class. I always did it right before school started on the day it was due."

"Really? You procrastinator! Why did you stall if it was so easy?"

"Simple. I just didn't want to bother doing pointless stuff that I already knew all about. You know, when I was in fifth grade, we were learning about the planets of the solar system. I knew all about that when I was in first and second grade! I even knew that there were traces of oxygen in the atmosphere of Mars by the time I was eight!"

"Whoa."

"Yeah, whoa and giddy-up. When the test came, I missed a couple questions because the book was so out of date! I mean, what kind of idiot thinks that the Earth's orbit around the sun is a perfect circle? Some of the morons in class got an A+, and I think that's a pretty good indicator of how screwed up a test is!"

"What did the teacher say?"

"She said that the test was 'on the book' and that she had to grade it by the answer key. I told her that I knew what the system was, but that it was ridiculous to give people credit for writing disinformation on a test! I mean, what's the purpose of going to school if they don't teach you the facts?" (This incident actually happened to me.)

"Well...we'll improve the system."

"Yeah, I don't want any student of mine to lose credit for being right." At around that time, a transmission interrupted them.

"Dib-ika! Mel! Hurry up and get out of there!"

"What are you talking about, Zim?" Dib inquired.

"The Seraul...they've found your signal. They're going to try and shoot you down!"

"Zim, are you joking with us because of Mel's vision?"

"He's not...Dib, this is my vision, coming true right now!"

"It is? Uh-oh." Their Voot met turbulence and they were flung to the top of the vehicle as it spun in circles. Screaming, Mel grabbed for something to hold onto and keep her stable.

"Dib! We've got to stabilize manually! The controls are useless if we're spinning aimlessly!"

"How do we do that?!"

"I'm going to try and activate the emergency air pressure valve! That should equalize the general balance and stability of the ship!"

"Good thinking!" As they were hit again, they both screamed, but the vehicle righted itself in conjunction with the hit and moved steadily forth. The lighting flickered, and Mel was trying to get the emergency power supply online.

"It's not working! The shields have taken enough! One more blow and we're done for!"

"What should we do?!"

"Grab the controls! Try to get us out of the danger zone! I'll repair the electrical energy conductors and life support systems!" Taking out a key, she pulled a string through a hole in it and tied both ends to some metal hooks. With the aid of a slab of wood, she jammed the key into a small indentation. "There! That should be adequate enough for power to circulate temporarily!" She slammed the compartment door shut and glanced out the window. They were spiraling downward toward the surface of a planet. "The Seraul! Hurry! Get us out of here! We're going to die!"

"Not this time!" He swerved the vehicle back, directing the Voot straight toward the Seraul fleet. Looming ahead of them like death itself, Dib appeared to be attempting suicide.

"What the heck are you doing?! ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!"

"I know what I'm doing!"

"I sure hope so!" He accelerated the Voot, and Mel closed her eyes. The ship vibrated violently, and she thought she'd vomit from the G forces involved. Soon, they were through it--the Seraul ships were apparently so bulky and large that to turn all the way around would take a little while and weaken their power. "Whoa...how did you think of that? Did you get it from Star Trek or something like that?" Dib chuckled at this.

"Nah, it was just an impulse action."

"At least your first impulse wasn't to go crash-landing down on that planet."

"If you hadn't told me about your vision, I might not have reacted properly."

"Well, it's good that I have a sense for these things."

They arrived on Fali by the end of the day and went to their room. Gir, fortunately, was deeply involved in a weeklong All My Falens marathon.

"YAY! Everybody's hugging again!"

"Uh...yeah... Gir, do you know where my books are? I can't seem to find them."

"Oh...there they are!"

"Gir...that's a box of chicken."

"Oh...I gave them to the chicken guy! Pavements, he says."

"Uh-oh...Gir, you gave away my rare books from Earth as payment to the chicken guy! How could you do that?!"

"Did I do that?" Gir giggled insanely.

"Yes, you DID do that! Those are my only books that I have with me! They're from Earth! All other copies have been destroyed! GRRR!"

"Yes?"

"Not you! Dib, we've got to get the books back from the chicken guy!"

Dib sighed in frustration. "Oh...all right. Gir, where's the chicken guy from?"

"Here!"

"No, I mean which restaurant he's from."

"Chicken Palace!"

"Okay, we'll look it up...oh, no."

"What's wrong?" Mel asked.

"There are approximately 57 locations of Chicken Palace in the county!"

"Uh...that would be...bad, right?"

"We'll just have to call them and see."
"Let the night of the high phone bill begin." He called them, one by one, and as luck would have it, the fifty-seventh location was the one Gir had ordered from.

"You still have them? Good. We'll be right over. Thank you."

"They have my books?"

"Yeah. We're going to have to leave right away, though. It's about...30 miles from here."

"You've got to be kidding!"

"No, I'm not. Well...we'll have to go by Voot Runner."

"Wait...Gir is here. I don't want to unleash him onto the world to wreak doom and havoc. I'll stay with Gir."

"Okay. See you soon."
"See you." He left, and Mel dragged Gir from the television. "Gir, as much as I like to see you watching something other than a stupid monkey, I want to talk to you, and I'm afraid the TV will have to go off."

"Oh..."

"However, I do think you might be interested in what I have to say. Well...no, not really, but if you listen to me intensely then I will reward you with a cupcake."

"Mm!" Gir squeaked.

"Okay. See, right now I'm living here on planet Fali, Dib's home world."

"Yay!"

"Not 'yay,' Gir."

"Oh..."

"I mean, I'm sure I would get along here fine, but...it's so different. And my family misses me, and I miss them. Sure, being on another planet is such a rush, it's...absolutely amazing. I swear, it's incredible. But I'm not going to kid myself on this one. I don't belong here."

"Then where do you belong?"

"I wish I knew the answer to that question, Gir. I wish I knew." Dib returned fairly quickly, considering the distance, and Mel made up her mind to tell him how she felt about staying.

"So...you don't like it here?"

"It's not that I don't like it. I just don't think I'll be happy here. It's not where I belong."

"Do you want to go back to Earth?"

"I...I don't know. I didn't think that I'd want to go back after it's been conquered, but...it's my home, and I don't want to abandon it just yet. I don't care about living in danger and always having to watch out for death. That's what we've been doing and still are, isn't it? And the Seraul are bound to find us here. Why don't we just leave without checking out and go back to Earth?"

"I don't know... I mean, this is my planet. I want to live here. I do belong here."

"But you were born on Earth. You're mother said so. Come on, we can find survivors; we can rebuild Earth! We can make it better than it ever was before! We can--"

"It's not going to happen. We'll just have to accept life on this other planet. You're just in denial that Earth is gone. You've got to face reality."

"No, I'm not in denial. Earth isn't gone. You're the one who's gone. I thought you cared enough about humanity to try to save it from destruction."

"It's different now. I'm not human."

"Maybe not by whatever definition you refer to, but you've lived on Earth your whole life, Dib. Do you think that suddenly looking different and finding out that you're another species really changes who you've always been? It's all in your mind. This change in emotions and thought processes is all because you think that it should go that path. It doesn't have to. As far as I'm concerned, you're still human."

"That's pretty far-fetched."

"Oh, yeah? Well, wouldn't you say that maybe Bigfoot was far-fetched? Doesn't matter now anyway; if there was a Bigfoot or Loch Ness Monster, it's dead. Everything. No matter--you get my point. Maybe on the outside you're a Falen/Seraul, but on the inside, you're as human as I. It's just a matter of coming to terms with it."

"You make a lot of sense. I almost believe you. But I have been a Falen all my life, but I didn't know it."

"Didn't you notice that everything started changing when you found out that you were not human? Anything that makes you different from humans you've had your entire life as well. If I suddenly found out that I was an alien, I'd still be the same person, but I'd be affected greatly. It would change my outlook on life. But inside, I'd still be the same. You're human. No matter what you look like or what planet you're on, you'll always be human. That's something you can't change. Now, whether or not you're coming, I'm going to live on Earth. It's my planet and yours too, but if you want to abandon your species, you will. I can't stop you."

"Mel, wait."

"Yes?"

"I will come."

"Excellent. Let's leave immediately. We'll organize a search team to find humans that have survived."

"Great. Let's get in the Voot Runner now." He flew it back to Earth, Mel wondering what they would find. Landing near Zim's base, they got out and ran up to the door. Zim wasn't inside, though, and scared them by tapping on their shoulders.

"Do you two need something?"

"Uh, yeah. Mel wants to have a search team to save any survivors."

"What?! I'm not going to assist in saving the lives of humans!"

"You helped saving ours."

"Yes, but--"

"She really wants to help Earth. And so do I."

"But this planet is gone! The Phantom Wandering has begun, and I'm trying to destroy humanity!"

"Look, Zim. This isn't about what you're trying to do or want to do. It's about what we want to do. We won't bother you anymore. We just need directions so we can be on our way."

"Well, you'd better head north if you're going to evade Irken soldiers. No one goes there with the Phantom Wandering because it's too intense. But you might be able to make it."

"Thanks," Dib said, running north and dragging Mel behind.

"Yeah, Zim. Thank you for not trying to kill me this time!"

"I told you I didn't want to!" Zim pleaded.

"Of course I believe that! Really, I do!" She was out of earshot a few seconds later, and Zim stared at her for a while, knowing that they would never be seen by his Irken eyes again unless he did something. Once they were out of view, Zim lifted his feet from the ground, tensed, and took off after them.

"Wait! Wait! Mel, wait!" Zim caught up to them and waved his arms desperately in the air, hoping for them to stop.

"What is it?" Dib asked, annoyed.

"I want to go with you two."

"You what?"

"I want to go with you."

"I thought you were dedicated to the destruction of humanity."

"I was! I don't want Mel to go with you alone, though."

"Any why not?"

"Because...because...because she knows nothing of what you are!"

"What are you talking about?"

"Do you know why the Irkens call the Falish 'ika'?"

"Because you're saying that we're primitive."

"No. Well, yes, but there's a specific reason. You see, the Falish...usually when they fall in love, they...they...they prey upon the females!"

"What? I'm not even in love. She's just my friend. I'd never do that, anyway. I can't believe you'd lie about my species like that, and in front of Mel!"

"It's not a lie! Why do you think your kind is dying, Dib? Food was running out as the population grew, so you resorted to cannibalism and took the females as your victims! Ever notice the lack of female Falens? Even your father killed your mother just days ago! It's the habits of the Seraul as well! The Irkens perfected the system, though, and broke away from the Seraul and the Falish habits!"

"Wait a minute, broke away?"

"Yes. The Irkens are a subspecies. We're the cross between a Falen mother and Seraul father." Dib swore.

"Then that's what I'm turning into. But why have I not always been..." he could barely bring himself to say it, "...Irken?"

"Simple. Your parents played with your DNA. You are supposed to end the war that's been going on between Fali and Seraul, but instead you've just made it worse. Even though you settle some of the political arguments, now they're wondering what planet your citizenship is in! If you choose Fali, the Seraul will attack, but if you choose Seraul, the Falish will attack. It's chaos!"

"We've left both planets. For good. Earth is my home."

"But Dib-ika, if you don't decide by the age of thirteen, war will break out!"

"That's really screwed up. Anything I do ends in war. Great."

"Of course it is! Before I knew that you were a Falen/Seraul, I thought that your name was just a coincidence, but you're going to start another branch of Irkens. They have other test subjects, and it's likely you'll marry one of them."

"What? No way, I'm not going to marry someone just because they've been tested on like me."

"Yes, you are. You're going to marry the one named Kiana."

"No I'm not! Besides, Mel isn't even a Falen or a Seraul, or a Falen/Seraul."

"Then you mean that she is Kiana?! She must come with me, then! I can't have your ika filth slobbering all over her!"

"Geez, I don't even like her as more than a friend. I hardly think I'm at the point of 'slobbering all over her.'"

"You know what I mean! I can't have things elevate!"

Mel stepped into the conversation and said, "Elevate? Oh, geez, Zim, do you really think that things will elevate? I wouldn't go out with him until the world ended!"

"Uh...Mel..."

"Or even if the world ended!"

"But didn't you go to the dance with him?"

"Well, yeah, but that was nothing serious. It was just to get back at you, you know. Sorry, Dib, but looks like you'll have to wait for somebody else to come along."

"We'd better hurry if we're going to make it to a safe spot soon. We need to head further into the Phantom Wandering."

"All right, but you know what?"

"What?"

"If we die because of you, I'm going to kill you."

"How can you kill me if we all died?"

"Oh, I'd find a way."
"What about a survival plan? I know! If we run out of food, we eat the Dib!"

"No way, Zim! You're not eating my friend!"

"It's not like he's your property! I can eat him if I want to!"

"No you can't! Just because you're an Irken doesn't mean you can go around eating people!"

"He's not a people! He's an ika!"

"No, he's a person!"
"Ika!"

"Person!"
"Ika!"

"Person!"

"IKA!"
"PERSON!"

"I said he's a--Mel, do you feel like we're being watched?"

"Yeah...and I don't think we're being watched by anything human...or Irken...or Falish...or--"

"What do you suppose we're being watched by? A Vort scientist?"

"No...something beyond this realm of reality. Something...different." They turned their heads sharply around. "Where's Dib? He was here just a second ago..."

"I don't know...I saw him a minute ago too, but he's gone. Let's go before something happens to us."

"No, we're staying here. Just hold my hand. It'll work out okay."

"Are you sure?"

"No, not really."

"Mel, I have the feeling that we're about to be attacked."

"So do I."

"Duck down!" Zim pushed Mel to the ground, and she looked up at him.

"Nothing's here, Zim. Why did you tell me to duck down?"

"There was something, and there still is."

"I don't see anything."

"Of course you don't see anything! But it's there!"

"Zim, have you finally cracked up?"

"No...we've got to get out of here! I don't care what happens to the Dib-ika, you're getting out of here alive!"

"We're not leaving without Dib! I'm not going to abandon anyone just because I start to get a weird feeling of being watched!"

"The Irken officials have probably discovered us! We need to get out of here, now!"

"No!"

"Why must you be so difficult?!"

"I can't explain it. It's something I just know I have to do. Something will occur that is important to me." Zim stood nervously with her, clutching her hand tightly.

"Whatever you feel is important about staying, I trust you completely."

"Why this trust, Zim? Why would you care for a human?"
"You're...different from them."

"So I am... So I am."

"What do you expect to gain of this waiting?"

"I expect to gain nothing except for being able to live with myself. We must try to find out where Dib has gone. I can feel it."

"Is it the destruction of your world that has affected you in such a way?"

"Is it the knowledge that you can never return to your position as a military figure among your people that has destroyed your confident mask of deception and hatred?"

"I suppose I can't get that by you."

"Not much does, these days."

"You humans have families. How do you feel being apart from them?"

"Unsettled, but still very grateful for the fact that they do not know of this madness that has been rightfully invoked on my kind."

"How do you think the Dib is affected?"

"What is this, an interrogation? Since when did you care if Dib was concerned about anything?"

"His state of mind might very well be the determining factor of whether we live or die."

"Life, death, it's all the same to me. I'll die some point in my life anyway, and I really don't see how it matters under what circumstances that happens."

"It does matter when those who care for you live beyond a fatal tragedy."

"And that, my Irken friend, is why I must try to teach Dib the reality of things--there is a thin line between life and death, tragedy and ecstasy, love and hate--it's all in an intermingled mesh of whatever this existence is or isn't. That way, he will mourn my passing no more than he does the loss of..."

"An ice-cream?"

"The comparison makes no difference. You understand the point I'm making. Death is not something to shed tears over, though it is considered respectful of the dead."

"Do you think this death will come soon?"

"It already has. Whether I am the one to die or not, the actions have already taken place, and I predict that sometime in the near future, one of us three will be dead under what is considered 'tragic' circumstances. If it is me, then...well, inform the Falish and tell them to contact the reality I come from and tell my family I am doing well here. In that event, I wish no one to know who doesn't have to."

"I promise."

"Thank you, Zim. I appreciate that."

The definition of what is considered to be 'noble' is highly debatable, for an action that may be noble to one person may be entirely ordinary for another person and be done without thought. In addition to this thought, it is curious how people say that it is good for children to 'make the mistakes they must make' and that they will learn and grow from these errors. To err is to be human. If the preceding text is accurate, then to learn is to be human. Humanity is full of errors--but what exactly have we learned?

Confusion and paradox is the basis of logic.

--Invader Mel's Diary of Perception.