The Pursuit of Janice

Author's Note (revised): Well, thank goodness for Cress. Come on you guys – I scatter reviews around fairly freely, is it too much to ask to get some back?

I have slightly revised Chapter 1, having realised that Janice's baby will by now be a little girl (the end of Series 8 finally reveals that her child with Gary was a daughter).

This is another from the Suppose Things Had Gone a Different Way … stable, but I have separated it out because I got the idea of giving it a different background from that of the actual series, in fact of making it follow on from one of my own stories, True Love. In this, Monica and Rachel fall in love, form a stable relationship and finally get married a bit more than a year after Ross's marriage to Emily (no f/f action will be described beyond kissing and hugging). As a consolation to Chandler, who had been beginning to have strong feelings for Monica, they manage to get him back together with Kathy. That is the situation when this story opens, not too long after their marriage. Joey and Phoebe, it should be said, have not changed in any essential respect.

In justification of the story-line: I have indicated before that I think there is a lot to be said for Janice (see more than one part of Suppose Things Had Gone a Different Way …). For my view of her as a lover, I cite again from Series 3,1 what I quoted at the beginning of TOW Chandler Is King, But Who Is Queen?:

Janice: Okay. All right. This is what we're gonna call it: 'Joey and Janice's DAY OF FUN!'
Joey: Does it have to be a whole day?
Janice: Yes, because that's how long it takes to love me.
Joey: Yeah, I know, I sleep in the next room.

Disclaimer: The Friends characters do not belong to me, but to Bright, Kauffman and Crane Productions and Warner Bros. Their use is not intended for profit, only for entertainment.

Chapter 1: The Bet

Chandler and Joey were hanging out in their apartment one dull, cold Sunday afternoon. Although Chandler and Kathy were still dating, their relationship had never progressed as far as living together. Kathy was happy to have Chandler stay overnight in her apartment or to visit him, but she seemed to place a lot of weight on their keeping separate in this way, and Chandler was too happy to have her back to raise any objection – he too preferred it, in fact. At the moment she was deep in rehearsals for a new play, and so Chandler had a free afternoon.

They were chatting idly about relationships, past and present, when Joey suddenly said, 'Tell me, dude, what did you see in Janice? Why did you keep going back to her?'

'It couldn't possibly be because I was desperate for a girlfriend and some sex, could it?' said Chandler ironically.

'Was that all?' said Joey. 'But you always found her so hard to take, except that one time when you connected up again over the Web and you really seemed to be in love with her. What was that, then?'

Chandler frowned, trying to disentangle the positive feelings that he had once had about Janicer from all the unhappiness that he had felt when they had their painful breakup and the irritation that had caused him to dump her previously, and to pretend he was going to Yemen rather than renew their relationship.

'She's … attractive,' he said. 'She has a good figure, believe me, and all that nice hair. She's smart; she knows stuff, like about art, though she doesn't bore you with it like Ross. She can be good on emotional things, even though she's rather messed up herself; remember how she spotted my use of humour as a defence mechanism right away, when we were talking over the Web. She's sympathetic; she spent a lot of time listening to me moaning on about my life. And she could be very helpful; look at all the effort she put into helping me pack for Yemen.'

'But you didn't want to go there, 'Joey objected.

'Yeah, but she didn't know that,' said Chandler. He sighed. 'If it weren't for that voice, and that laugh, and her tendency to act like one of those big over-affectionate dogs, and her cute little phrases that aren't cute at all, and the way she constantly overdramatises everything …' He paused, then sighed again. 'She did have a lot of good qualities.'

'I notice you haven't mentioned one thing,' said Joey insinuatingly.

'Huh?' went Chandler.

'Well, to judge from what I had to listen to, being next door, she could be good in bed.'

'Oh … yeah,' said Chandler. 'Well … she could be a bit … demanding. But she was very sexy, and she would try anything.'

'Really?' said Joey, showing more interest than before.

'Oh yeah!' said Chandler, suddenly sounding enthusiastic. 'I learned quite a lot with her. What was so great about her was, whatever I did, she was very responsive, and very congratulatory about my performance – more so than Kathy sometimes, to be absolutely honest.' He suddenly looked wistful. 'In that respect Janice was very good for my morale, you know.'

Joey found himself rather intrigued by what Chandler had said. Most of his girlfriends were not very adventurous when it came to sex. More than one had gone very cold towards him when he suggested anything out of the ordinary.

'She sounds worth getting to know,' he commented.

Chandler looked at him in surprise. 'I thought you couldn't stand her, man. You gave me enough grief when I was with her, remember?'

'Yeah, well maybe I didn't appreciate her good qualities,' said Joey casually.

Chandler continued to look at him in surprise. Then understanding dawned. 'It's because of what I said about the sex, isn't it?' he said. 'Joe, you of all people cannot be that desperate for it.'

'I kinda like the sound of a girl who'll try anything,' said Joey, giving his lascivious grin.

Chandler began to grin also. 'You couldn't take it,' he scoffed. 'You couldn't even stand being in her company long enough to get her into bed.'

'Oh no?' said Joey. 'Remember, I lasted through Joey and Janice's Day of Fun without giving her the idea I was hating it. You wanna put some money where your mouth is?'

'Ten bucks says you couldn't make it that far,' said Chandler confidently.

'Ten measly bucks?' said Joey. 'C'mon, Chandler, give me some incentive here!'

'Isn't the thought of the sex enough?' said Chandler with a smirk. 'But, okay, how much can you stand to lose?'

Joey knew that he was taking a risk, but he had faith in his power over women. He thought quickly, while Chandler looked at him with a satirical glint in his eye.

'Make it … forty,' said Joey. 'Not that I'm expecting to lose, of course.'

Chandler laughed. 'Okay, my fine feathered friend, you're on.' He held out his hand.

'You will tell me where I'm likely to meet her?' Joey asked.

'Sure, I'll give you that much help,' said Chandler.

'And I'll have to tell her that you didn't go toYemen,' Joey warned.

'Rather you than me,' Chandler replied insouciantly. 'That would actually be a help, if you could break it to her.'

'And you won't object if I bring her into Central Perk?' Joey went on, trying to make sure he had all the bases covered.

'No, the thought of the forty extra bucks I shall be enjoying will insulate me from all unpleasantness,' said Chandler. 'Now, are you gonna shake on it or not?'

Joey paused for a long moment, then took Chandler's hand. 'It's a deal.' He sat back and let out a breath. 'You know, Chandler,' he went on, 'I think this could be good for me. I look on it as a challenge, and I don't get too many challenges in my love-life. It could sharpen my game, and maybe I need that.'

'No one needs Janice,' said Chandler, shuddering. 'Seriously, Joe, I think you are making a mistake. Janice is not your kind of woman at all. And supposed she gets fixed on you, instead of me?'

'No sweat,' said Joy confidently. 'I'm much better at breaking up with women than you.' Chandler shook his head. 'Well, I hope this will prove a positive experience for you,' he said, 'but you know what they used to say out West? There ain't no horse that can't be rode … there ain't no man that can't be throwed.'

Joey shrugged. 'Say, shall we go over and tell Monica and Rachel?' he said. 'They might find this interesting.'

Chandler looked doubtful. 'I'm not sure they'd approve. They've … changed a bit since they got together.'

'Dude, they're so happy!' Joey protested. 'It makes me feel good just to see it.'

'Yes,' said Chandler, 'but they're even more inclined to take a woman's side in anything than they were before. We could tell them when we get together next, but it's a bit early to be going over right now.'

Joey nodded. 'Okay. How about some foosball, instead?'

'You're on,' said Chandler. 'Maybe this time I'll get to beat your ass.'

On the same afternoon, Monica and Rachel were happily engaged in whipping up a batch of brownies, which they had agreed was just the thing for a day like this. In fact, Rachel was doing most of the preparation, with Monica offering a guiding comment or some expert help every now and then. Finally, Rachel put the brownies in the oven and turned to Monica with a triumphant smile. She was flushed, her hair was all over the place, and she had smears of chocolate on her forehead and left cheek, but Monica thought she looked absolutely adorable, and told her so as she pulled her into an embrace and gave her an extremely enthusiastic kiss.

'I still can't believe my luck, to wind up with you,' she said after the kiss.

Rachel put her arms round Monica and gave her an equally ardent kiss back. 'How do you think I feel?' she said. 'All those years looking for a secure love, and it turns out to be my best friend!'

They exchanged loving glances, and were about to renew their kisses when the buzzer went.

Monica went over. 'Who is it?'

'Hi, Monica,' came a familiar voice, though sounding rather subdued. 'Could I come up? I've something rather important to ask you.'

'It's Janice,' Monica hissed. 'She sounds … strange.'

'Let's see what she wants,' said Rachel. 'We haven't seen her since Chandler "went to Yemen".'

'Okay, Janice, come on up,' said Monica, pushing the door release. She turned to Rachel. 'You've got chocolate all over your face,' she said, grinning. 'There's one bit.' She dabbed a finger to Rachel's cheek and licked it.

'Why didn't you tell me before?' Rachel shrieked, and rushed into the bathroom to wipe it off. She returned just as Monica let Janice in.

'Mm, looks like someone's been cooking up a storm!' said Janice, surveying the kitchen area. 'How are you guys? You look great.'

Janice herself did not look great. Her face was strained, there were dark markings under her eyes, which were rather bloodshot, and her hair was rather greasy-looking and tangled.

'We're fine. Have a seat,' said Monica, waving at the couch.

'Would you like something to drink?' said Rachel hospitably. 'And a cookie, perhaps? We still have some of those raisin muffins I made, don't we, Mon? We've just been making brownies, but they won't be ready yet awhile.'

Janice's eyes popped. 'Wow, Rachel, you getting into cooking?'

Rachel grinned and nodded. 'I have begun to find it interesting, and you get something nice to eat at the end.'

'Now you do,' said Monica teasingly. 'But there were plenty of disasters to start off with.'

'Oh you!' cried Rachel. 'There weren't that many disasters!' She picked up a kitchen glove and threw it at Monica, who ducked it easily, giggling.

Janice looked at them in wonder. She had never seen them so playful. She coughed a bit meaningfully and said, 'If I could take you up on that drink, Rachel …'

'Oh sure!' said Rachel. 'I'm sorry, Janice. We get carried away sometimes. Coffee, tea, juice?'

'Some nice hot coffee would be perfect,' said Janice. She watched in wonder as Rachel bustled about getting the coffee on, while Monica simply sat and watched her with a fond expression.

'So, Janice,' said Monica, turning to her.

'Yeah,' said Janice. 'Well, it's about Chandler. It's been over a year and he hasn't written, he hasn't even phoned. I know we never used to write, but he wasn't so far away, and we used to talk on the phone all the time. So, surely you hear from him: is he okay?' Her voice shook slightly, and she pulled a handkerchief from her sleeve and blew her nose loudly.

Monica and Rachel looked at each other unhappily. They knew only too well that Chandler would want nothing to do with Janice now.

'Excuse us a moment,' said Monica to Janice. 'We have to talk.' She went over to Rachel, who was standing by the coffee percolator, and muttered, 'Should we tell her?'

Rachel thought hard, aware that Janice was looking at them intently. She felt a sudden pang of sympathy for her. They had all been guilty of failing to accept that Janice had felt real love for Chandler, that her breakup with him had been just as hard for her as for him, that, in fact, she was fully entitled to have her feelings considered.

'I say yes,' she said finally. 'It's cruel to let her go on nursing false hopes. But this could be bad. If you'll tell her, I'll be on hand if she needs a shoulder to cry on. I feel sorry for her.'

'That's so like you, sweetie,' said Monica lovingly. 'You have such a big heart.'

They came back to Janice, serious-faced. Rachel sat down beside her, while Monica took a chair opposite. She looked at them with an almost painful air of expectation, seeming very tense.

'Oh God, something's happened to him,' she blurted out.

Monica shook her head. 'Janice dear, it's time you knew the truth. Chandler never got transferred to Yemen. It was all a story, to avoid getting together with you again. He just couldn't get up the nerve to tell you straight out, it was over.'

'We're very sorry,' Rachel put in.

Janice looked at each in turn, gulped and swallowed hard. 'He … he lied to me?' she choked out. 'He … he doesn't love me any more?'

'He's with someone else now, an actress called Kathy,' said Monica. 'They've been together for quite a while.'

'And all this time, the schmuck hasn't found the common decency to tell me?' Janice cried, sounding tearful but also mad. 'He had no problem dumping me the first few times!'

'He was never all that good at it,' said Monica. 'Remember, he got Phoebe to do it the second time. And, Janice, I don't quite like to say this, but you did rather assume you could pick up with him just where you left off. But that breakup hurt him deeply.'

'It hurt me too,' Janice wailed, and she began to sob, quickly breaking down to a point where she was crying with complete abandon. Rachel threw her arms around her and held her against her, making soothing noises, while Monica, very touched, went to kneel by her, take a loose hand and pat it for a while, before getting up to pour some coffee, get a plate and the cookie jar, and check the brownies.

Finally Janice calmed down. Hands shaking a little, she picked up the coffee, sipped it, and smiled at them rather tremulously.

'Thanks, you guys,' she said rather hoarsely. 'Sorry to be so … so emotional.'

'That's okay, Janice,' said Rachel easily. 'Monica and I know what's it's like. We've had our share of breakups.'

Janice took a longer drink, and sighed in satisfaction. 'Mm, good coffee!' She looked at them. 'You seem pretty happy now, anyway.' Her eyes narrowed. 'Say, aren't those rings I see? You're married?'

'Yeah, we're married,' said Rachel, smiling.

But … who to?' said Janice, sounding perplexed. 'And why are you still living together, or so it seems? Where are your husbands? They haven't gone abroad, surely?'

'Well, Janice,' said Monica gently, 'you see, we're married to each other.'

'Nooo!' said Janice, her jaw dropping. She just avoided spilling her coffee, and set it down very carefully.

'There's no reason you should know,' Monica said. 'But we fell in love a year ago, and got married recently.'

'You've really gone gay?' said Janice with maximum incredulity.

Monica winced. It was not an expression she cared for all that much. 'If you want to put it that way, yes.'

Janice looked intensely interested. 'Please tell me all about it.'

Monica and Rachel had not had a chance to tell their story to a new listener for some time, and they rather liked doing so, so they seized the opportunity. Between them, they gave Janice a very full account, pausing only when Rachel got the brownies out. Janice hung on their words, completely involved. She noticed the fond glances they exchanged continually.

'I can see it now,' she said. 'I thought there was something different about you. You really are in love, aren't you?'

'Yes, we are,' said Rachel, reaching out to take Monica's hand. 'I've never been so happy.'

'Nor I,' said Monica, squeezing Rachel's hand but then letting it go. 'But, Rach, I'm afraid this must be painful for Janice to watch.'

'No, it's so sweet,' said Janice enthusiastically. 'You're as cute as a basket of kittens!' She drank more coffee and bit into her muffin.

'Mm, great muffin!' she said. 'Well, with you guys as an example, maybe I should consider a relationship with a woman. I might get somewhere.' She cackled briefly. 'Perhaps you could tell me where I could go to find women who might be interested.'

Rachel giggled involuntarily at the very thought of the havoc that Janice would wreak if she appeared in the club that she and Monica sometimes went to with Carol and Susan. Monica directed a quelling glance at her.

'Janice dear,' she said gently, 'it's not as easy as that. I mean – have you ever felt yourself attracted to a woman, for instance?'

Janice suddenly looked embarrassed. 'Well, actually, yeah.'

'Oh, who?' Rachel asked, intrigued.

'Um, I really shouldn't say,' said Janice, looking down and fiddling with her watch strap.

'Oh, go on, Janice, your secret is safe with us,' said Rachel merrily. 'We of all people should sympathise.'

'Don't push her, Rachel,' said Monica. Then light dawned. 'You mean – one of us?'

Janice looked up with an apprehensive expression and nodded. 'Actually, it's you. Rachel and Phoebe are both very attractive, but I never felt the same way about them.'

'Wow!' said Rachel. 'Mon, you should be flattered.'

'I am,' said Monica. She smiled at Janice. 'But I'm completely committed to Rachel.'

'I know that!' said Janice with a touch of irritation. 'Anyway, you're not the only one. I've felt a similar attraction to other women I've known or even just seen. But obviously I feel a lot of attraction to guys too.'

'Do you know Chloe in the copying shop nearby?' said Rachel.

'Rachel!' said Monica, frowning. 'That's not kind.'

'Why, what about this Chloe?' said Janice in puzzlement.

Monica realised that Janice could know nothing of the great breakup with Ross. She explained briefly. Janice listened open-mouthed. She looked at Rachel at the end, frowning a little.

'Why should you want to set me up with Chloe, then?' Her jaw dropped. 'What, you think that would pay Chloe out? Am I that hard to take?' She looked about to burst into tears again.

Full of remorse, Rachel scooted along the couch and hugged her. 'I'm so sorry, Janice. It was unfeeling of me. I do apologise.'

Janice smiled a little. 'Okay. But look, you guys,' she went on seriously, 'if there's something about me, something that may be offputting, which obviously I don't recognise in myself, I wish you'd tell me. I've had enough heartbreak, God knows.' She looked at them pleadingly.

Monica and Rachel looked at each other.

'I say we do it,' said Rachel. 'I want to help Janice now, as payback for being mean in the past, even if she didn't notice.'

'Oh, I noticed,' said Janice a little bitterly. 'But you've changed now. I've never known you so friendly as you were when I came in.'

'It's because we're so happy,' said Rachel. 'Come on, Mon, let's help Janice to understand her faults and, hopefully, overcome them.'

Monica looked a little uncertain, but finally nodded. 'Okay, but I'm not sure how much we can do. I mean – Janice, have you always laughed like that?'

Janice looked guilty and blushed a little. 'I … well, um … that is to say … to be perfectly honest, I put it on a lot of the time.'

Rachel gave a little shriek of laughter. 'Ooh, did you do it to wind us up? Well, it certainly worked, and I bet we deserved it sometimes.'

'But it wasn't smart to do it with Chandler,' said Monica. 'It grated on him, except during that one time when he was deeply in love with you.'

 'I know,' said Janice sadly, 'but I had got so into the habit …'

'Right,' said Monica bracingly. 'Well, that's one thing you can work on, cutting down on that kind of laugh. No one's saying you can't laugh at all.'

'Say, is there a lot of this?' said Janice uneasily. 'Because I have to be getting back soon, or my babysitter will cut up rough.'

'Oh yes!' cried Rachel. 'How's your little girl? We completely forgot to ask.'

Janice smiled. 'She's a doll. She's the best thing in my life.'

They both beamed at her. 'Some day soon, I want to get pregnant,' said Monica. 'I'll be glad of advice from you then. Okay, well, to be honest, you could do quite a lot to … improve your chances of keeping a guy – or attracting a woman, if you feel that way inclined. Why don't you come round again some time?'

'Could I really?' said Janice eagerly. 'Maybe I could bring my little girl. Would you like to see her?'

'We'd be delighted,' said Monica firmly, while Rachel clapped her hands and said, 'Ooh yes, I would!'

Janice got to her feet and looked at them seriously. 'Thanks, you guys,' she said in a very sincere voice. 'You did the right thing, telling me, and you've been great since. We'd better exchange telephone numbers, and then I must be off.'

They saw her to the door and bade her a friendly farewell; Rachel actually hugged her.

Monica grinned at her when Janice was gone. 'All this hugging Janice! If I didn't know you better, I'd be jealous.'

'It's just … I'm so happy, I want everyone else to be,' said Rachel, giving her a loving look. 'We keep this quiet from the guys, right?'

'I see no reason to tell them,' said Monica. 'Okay, I think at least one of us needs a shower.'

'You want to come and … scrub my back?' said Rachel, with a seductive glance.

'Why do you think I suggested it?' said Monica. Laughing, they went off to their bedroom to get ready.