Chapter 3: First Meeting

Author's Note: This is rather short, but I think it makes an episode and am short of time to move the story along. Reactions, please.

Janice was doing a little late afternoon shopping in her local supermarket, and smiling to herself as she remembered how she had encountered Chandler there, when she spotted Joey. She almost burst out laughing at his lame attempt to appear casual and to encounter her by chance, and decided to goose him.

'Joey!' she cried. 'What a surprise, running into you here! You're way off your usual beat, aren't you?' Several people looked around, as she was operating almost at full decibels.

'Why, hello, Janice,' he said, turning with an embarrassed expression. 'Yeah, I'm, uh, looking for stuff for a pasta sauce and the, uh, tomatoes at our local place don't look too good, and Chandler said this looked a pretty good store.'

'Right!' she cried with maximum enthusiasm. 'You cook Italian stuff, don't you? Mm, love those sauces – marinara, carbonara, bolognese! Well, tomatoes are not round here.' Seizing him by the arm, she firmly steered him to the fresh food area, and "helped" him pick out a selection of the best tomatoes, a good garlic, nice basil leaves and other useful items. Then, of course, as she had suspected, it transpired that he didn't have the money to pay for them. Having the greatest difficulty in not exploding when he claimed he must have left his money in his other jeans, she offered him a deal.

'I'll pay for your stuff if you help me get my stuff back to my place,' she said. She could almost see the lightbulb go on over his head as he realised that this would get him into her apartment. He accepted with a smile that had elements of a leer about it.

Determined to get her money's worth out of him, she dragged him all over the store for the next twenty minutes, picking up a load of small items that she had been meaning to get. As she paid for everything, she remarked casually, 'Say, have you heard from Chandler recently? How's he doing in Yemen?' She picked up the lightest-looking bag, leaving him to carry the rest.

'Well, uh, um,' went Joey as she struggled to get everything into his arms. 'Well, Janice, I, uh, don't know how to tell you this – '

She stopped dead in front of the exit. 'What?' she said, looking at him intently. 'You sound serious. Has he … got himself someone else, in Yemen?'

She was speaking loudly, and several of the customers and staff, who had noticed the noisy progress of Janice and Joey round the supermarket, lingered nearby to listen, with expressions of interest.

'He, uh, never went to Yemen,' said Joey.

'But I saw him get on the plane,' Janice protested.

'Yeah, uh, but he came right back, as soon as he could,' Joey explained, beginning to look even more embarrassed as he realised that they had a growing audience.

'Why would he do that?' she asked at full volume.

'Janice, this may not be the best place – ' said Joey, now wearing a very harried expression .

'No, tell me right now!' she demanded, stamping her foot. 'Did he have someone else here?' She tried to make herself sound on the verge of tears.

'No no,' cried Joey in alarm. 'It's just …' He paused, realising that what he was about to say might produce even more of an adverse reaction than saying that Chandler had someone else.

'What?' Janice virtually screamed, enjoying herself immensely.

'He, he couldn't face telling you that you and he were through,' Joey stammered. The audience gave a collective gasp.

Janice stood frozen for a moment, then dropped her bag and gave vent to as loud a howl as she could manage and threw herself upon Joey, sobbing wildly. Evidently wishing the earth would open and swallow them up, Joey tried as best he could to comfort her, though badly hampered by having both arms full of supermarket bags.

Janice was refusing to be comforted. 'All this time!' she shrieked. 'All this time, and he didn't have the guts to tell me! And none of the rest of you did, either! What's the matter, don't you like me?'

There was a murmur of sympathy from the onlookers. Joey's actor soul responded to an audience, and he also realised that to get anywhere with her he could not afford even to hint that this might be true. 'Sure I like you, Janice,' he protested. 'It's just, well,' he had what he thought was a brainwave, 'he could change his mind again. He's been off and on with you so many times … and I didn't want to be the one to hurt you.' He put a lot of fake emotion into this, and swelled with pride when the audience responded. This was better than being on stage.

Janice pulled off his shoulder and looked up at him, blinking a lot so that he could not spot the lack of tears in her eyes. 'Oh, Joey, do you really mean that? You really care about hurting me?' she said in suitably astonished tones.

He tried to smile naturally. 'Yeah, I do, Janice.' He drew on his memories of the Chandler and Kathy business. 'That's why I've been uneasy about you. I was attracted to you, but you were Chandler's girl.'

As the audience made appreciative noises at this impromptu slice of soap opera, Janice got out a handkerchief and made a big production of wiping her eyes and blowing her nose. 'Well, I don't know what to say,' she said slightly haltingly. 'I mean, this is all so sudden.' She sighed, and squared her shoulders. 'Come on, let's get this stuff back to my apartment.' She picked up the bag she had dropped and set off. The audience murmured again, and some actually applauded.

'Good as Days of Our Lives,' said an old woman, stepping into his path. 'Say, weren't you in that once, young man?'

Joey sighed. 'I was Dr. Drake Ramoray.'

The old woman cackled. 'Dropped down a lift shaft, didn't you? Kinda careless. And is that yer young lady? No, 'course not, that's what this whole scene was about.' Like others there, she seemed to be confusing what she had been seeing with a scene on TV.

Janice had turned when perceiving that Joey had been held up. She was finding it harder and harder not to laugh, and let rip briefly at this opportunity.

'I'm not his young lady yet,' she said archly, 'but stranger things have happened at sea, eh Joey?'

The wince disguised in a smile with which he responded to this was worth the price of admission in itself to Janice. She let off another, longer laugh and dug him in the ribs, then marched off, to cheers from the audience. Hastily Joey followed.

Janice showed no hesitation in letting Joey follow her into her apartment. 'Put it all in the kitchen,' she said. 'We must sort out what's yours. Would you like a drink for your help?'

'I could use a beer,' Joey said, hoping she would have one too.

'Sure,' she said, and got one out of the fridge and opened it for him, but she took a Snapple for herself.

'Come sit for a while,' she said, 'and tell me about the others. What's everyone doing? How are Ross and Rachel doing, and are the other girls dating anyone nice?'

'Well, uh,' he began, not sure what to say. But he knew that Monica and Rachel were completely open about their relationship, and if he ever brought Janice to Central Perk it would be bound to come out. He thought back to how things had been when Janice had hung out with them.

'Well … Ross and Rachel broke up,' he said. 'And Ross is now married to a British girl called Emily, here in New York, but,' he held up a hand as Janice appeared about to speak, 'that's not all. Before this marriage, Rachel and Monica fell in love, and now they're married to each other!' He sat back to await her reaction at this astounding revelation

'Wooow!' Janice breathed, widening her eyes. 'That is news! However did that happen?' She knew perfectly well, of course, but was curious to see what Joey would say.

'Well, uh, I'm not sure I really understand it,' said Joey rather desperately. 'Anyway, what's new with you, Janice?'

She did another laugh. 'Evasive action, huh? Okay, I won't press you on that, but I must say, I'm surprised.'

'They're so happy,' said Joey sentimentally. 'It would do you good to see it. And Mon's always cooking this great food for us, because she's so happy, and now Rach is learning to cook too.'

'Yeah, you always did like your food, didn't you?' said Janice in a friendly sort of way. 'Well, if they're happy, that's what counts. How about my Bing-a-ling? Is he happy?'

Joey looked uncomfortable. 'Well, he's going with this actress called Kathy. It's quite a long story, as she started off being my girl.'

'Well, well, well!' said Janice merrily. 'There you sit in Central Perk drinking your coffee, and who would guess all this was going on?' She drained her Snapple. 'Now if you don't mind, Joey, I must go pick up my daughter. I left her with a neighbour; we do good turns for each other that way. You sort out your stuff and put it in any bag you want.'

Joey cursed himself for forgetting that Janice had a child. Unreasonably, he blamed Chandler for not having reminded him. While Janice was gone and he was collecting the unwanted vegetables, he reckoned that Janice's daughter must be well past three by now. He wondered idly what she would be like. He was pleasantly surprised when Janice returned with a pretty little dark-haired moppet, who seemed rather like a miniature version of Janice, without the mannerisms and laugh. He had to admit, Janice came across as a pretty good mom. He was impressed when she told her daughter, whose name turned out to be Maggie, in a much softer voice than she normally used, but quite firmly, that she had already watched enough TV for that day and should find something else to do. Maggie acted like she was quite used to obeying her mom and went off to look for a colouring book.

Janice smiled at Joey. 'Well, Joey,' she said, 'don't let me keep you.'

He summoned up all his nerve and put on his most charming smile. 'Say, uh, would you like a date some time? Maybe even a lunch date, if the evenings are difficult for you?'

'Why, Joey,' said Janice, putting her hand on her heart and fluttering her eyelashes at him, 'you certainly know how to sweep a girl off her feet. Look, I can't say yes or no right now. I have to make arrangements for Maggie. I'll call you, okay?'

'Uh, I don't have a cellphone,' he said, 'and, um, you might not want to call the apartment and get Chandler.'

She laughed, giving it all she'd got. 'That's not going to bother me, and if it makes him a bit jumpy, well, serve him right, is what I say. But okay, if you're uneasy about it, I'll get a message to you through Monica – you have her number, I guess?'

Joey, trying not to grit his teeth too visibly at her laugh, nodded and rattled it off once she had a piece of paper to write it on. Then he gave her his practised grin and left. Once she was sure he would be out of earshot, Janice sat down and laughed until her sides ached, so much that Maggie came, hoping to see something funny.

'You're too young to understand, sweetie,' said Janice, hugging her, 'but when you grow up, you'll find that men can be so funny sometimes, even when they're not trying to be.' She shook her head and laughed some more. Mystified, but pleased that her mother was so happy, Maggie went back to her colouring book.

Janice could not bear keeping this to herself, and rang Monica.

'Are you alone?' she said conspiratorially. 'I've got to tell you this – it's so funny.'

'Only Rachel here,' said Monica, beckoning to her. 'Lay it on us, Janice.'

They both listened at the cellphone as Janice told of her meeting with Joey, with many pauses as one or more of them broke down in helpless laughter.

'Oh Janice,' Monica gasped, when she had finished. 'I just wish I'd been there to see! Oh, this is going to be such fun, isn't it?'

'I think so,' came Janice's voice, sounding pleased that they had enjoyed the story so much. 'I'll be in touch.'