Chapter 11
REVEALED HEARTS : A FAREWELL
Tifa yawns when she is about to open her room door. Standing outside with Cloud for about half hour is enough to make her feel sleepy. After Vincent finished his play, they went inside and Cloud told her to go to bed. The surrounding is dark and very quiet, making her want to go to bed as soon as possible.
"Tifa…". Suddenly a soft, familiar voice to her ears, comes in. Tifa turns her face and sees her best friend and love rival is standing near her. She smiles at Tifa nicely, making Tifa smiles back at her.
"Oh hi, Aeris…Can't sleep too ?", Tifa greets her, still smiling. "Well…", Aeris giggles softly, "..Vincent's violin is too tempting to be refused…". Tifa nods her head, she then asks, "Me too…and…are you here for something ?". Hesitantly, Aeris replies, "Umm…I guess…I just want to talk to you…but seeing you're quite sleepy now…". Before she ends her sentence, Tifa already interrupts her, "Nope…That's all right…We haven't talked for a while…Let's talk like old days, okay ?". Tifa opens the door and tells Aeris to go inside with her thumb.
"Thanks, Tifa…", Aeris says as she sits on Tifa's chair. After closing the door, Tifa approaches her and sits on the bed edge. "Don't mention it…enjoy yourself here..", Tifa responds playfully.
"Tifa…anytime you feel sleepy, just go sleep…I'll be leaving then", Aeris advises her. She then continues, "You need to have enough rest…you'll be busy in next few days…". Smiling at Aeris, Tifa then responds, "Hey, we used to have little sleep in our old days. Come on Aeris, I won't be worn out that easy". She chuckles softly.
"Hmmm…you're right..", Aeris speaks her agreement in cheerful tone, now smiling too. "You proved yourself that you're tough girl, Tifa. Glad to have friend like you". Tifa winks at Aeris playfully.
"Really ?", Tifa smirks. Aeris replies with her chuckle. "And I'm also lucky to have a caring friend just like you..", Tifa comments out. They both then laugh together.
After laughing, Aeris turns her face to the window, staring outside. Her lips corner forms an upward curve. She must be thinking about something. "It's strange, don't you think so, Tifa ? ", finally Aeris speaks up. "We lived in Midgar in the past, but none of us knew each other until one day…It started from an incident between me and Cloud…then I knew you and Barret, then the others…We fought together, faced danger everywhere, and explored almost this whole world…".
Tifa pays her attention to Aeris while she talked. "Yeah, sometimes I still can't believe on what happened in the past..", Tifa shows her agreement. She then adds, "I never thought that I'll have close relatives other than Barret and Marlene here…but now…I have you all…and it took a near-death adventure…". Tifa then removes some of hair strands from her forehead.
"Yes…they are really nice people…", Aeris chimes. "I learned a lot from them. Although we faced hard times, some events were even funny to me. ". Aeris pauses for a moment. Short time later, she smiles, much more a funny smile.
"Hey, Tifa, do you remember when Barret wore a sailor uniform as disguise in the boat to Costa Del Sol ?". Aeris giggles upon recalling how funny Barret was at that time. Tifa's eyes sparkle as she remembers that event. She laughs too. "Of course ! ", she replies, "Barret was so big that even biggest sailor suit didn't fit into his body ! He cursed all the way, and he looked relieved when he wore off that sailor suit !". The girls laugh together again, now louder.
(In the meantime, Barret sneezes in middle of his slumber)
"Oh yes…I almost forgot one funny thing…", Aeris blurts out, she gives Tifa playful look. "What's that ?", Tifa asks her back, still in her laugh. Aeris cannot hold her laughter, she closes her laughing mouth with her hand. "That was…that was…", she pauses, laughing again, "…when you're in Don Corneo's mansion….does it ring the bell ?". She gives Tifa a hint. As Tifa quickly catches the idea, she then follows her laugh.
"You mean Cloud !!?? Of course !!! I was very startled to death at that time to see him in woman dress ! I barely recognized him if you didn't tell me who he..no…who she was ! Whose idea it was ?". Straightening her finger and points it to herself with playful motion, Aeris replies Tifa's question. "That was quite a struggle to get Cloud dressed in that way !", Aeris exclaims, "He had to use wig to cover his spiky-hair ! Guess he had thrown away his wig somewhere that nobody could reach it again ! But…I'm sure you'll agree with me Tifa, that Cloud's disguise was very perfect…even Don Corneo took him instead of us !". Aeris giggles at the end of her words.
(In the meantime, Cloud also sneezes loudly in his room)
The girls enjoy their time together as they recall their past memories. They laugh together when talking about funny things happened, and they pay attention to each other when they talk about bitter ones. It has been long time since last time they talk together freely.
"Aeris...", Tifa eventually calls her, "may I know…what's your saddest event in the past ?". Realizing that she enters a sensitive matter, Tifa quickly continues with low voice, "That's if you don't mind telling me…". Her expression shows a regret that she has blurted out something that may screw up their moment.
Aeris rests her back on chair and stares at a pair of Ruby eyes in front of her. Her voice is so soft, and so sad when she answers, "No…it's okay, Tifa…If you ask me such question, then I'll tell you that it was…event at Forgotten City…". Her voice becomes rough as if she conceals something beneath it. Of course, that is a moment she will never forget.
"I see…", Tifa responds lowly, "It must be very painful that time, Aeris….and actually, that was the saddest thing I ever faced so far….". Tifa's answer makes Aeris a bit surprised. From her tone, Aeris knows that Tifa really suffered that time.
"Really…?", Aeris asks Tifa, hoping an answer. Patting Aeris' thigh gently, Tifa then replies, "That wasn't me alone who suffered from your death…Everybody was mourning you…Aeris…mostly him….". Tifa lowers her voice when she mentioned 'him', she tries not to reach another sensitive subject to them.
Aeris nods her head. "Thanks, Tifa…You didn't ignore me…". She then lets out a sigh from her mouth. Although she is alive now, recalling the event when Sephiroth stabbed her is surely not a nice thing to do. The event itself is always frightening her. It makes her afraid that it will be happened again, moreover she has experienced death before, so she already knew the pain behind it.
"Aeris…may I ask you how is…death ? And what happened after that ?", Tifa asks in curiosity. After sweeping her hair to remove some hair strands, Aeris then replies, "Death…isn't something nice at all, Tifa, especially when you still have strong will to stay alive…". Aeris hangs her head down, her eyes meet a corner on the floor. From Aeris' tone, Tifa can tell that she really suffers recalling that event and this makes her feel guilty. "I'm sorry, Aeris…I'm just…too…curious…It's okay if you don't want to continue this matter…". Placing her hand on Aeris' shoulder, Tifa hopes she can ease her, even a little.
"Hey…it's okay, Tifa…it's really okay…", Aeris responds as she lifts up her face again. "It was a long time ago…I don't mind telling you about that. You asked what happened next ? Well…I was in Lifestream, watching you all…until The Meteor came and Holy didn't make it…I summoned Lifestream, requesting its help to support Holy destroying Meteor…after that…I just wandered around Lifestream until one day I was dropped from it, back to life again…". Aeris smiles at Tifa. Tifa seems considering Aeris' words, she then says, "So…it was you….I saw you when Lifestream came from everywhere, helping Meteor…I thought that was just my illusion…geez…that was real you…". Tifa speaks in astonishment upon remembering that event. Aeris just nods her head while smiling. "And now…here I am…right in front of you…breathing and alive…", she responds cheerfully.
"Then…welcome back, Aeris…", Tifa smiles, relieved that her friend is back to her old attitude again. Short time afterwards, they both fall in short silence.
"Tifa…I have something to tell to you…", Aeris' voice suddenly breaks the silence. Staring deeply into Tifa's eyes while keeping her lip smile, Aeris then continues, "I just want to say thank you very much….".
Tifa's eyes go wide after Aeris' words come to end, she looks puzzled. "H…hey…what's this, Aeris ? What's going on ?", she asks confusedly.
"It's about…him…", Aeris replies lowly, she still smiles at Tifa. As she hears Aeris' words, Tifa feels she is stunned rightly on her spot. Cloud. Since the beginning of their conversation, Tifa kept a distance from that subject, she intends not to hurt Aeris' feeling anymore. Now, it is Aeris herself who talks about the sensitive subject. No matter how Tifa avoids that subject, she knows that at some point, they will surely reach it. However, Tifa cannot refuse her since she is her best friend, and because she cannot hide behind the bush anymore.
"Y…yes..? What's up, Aeris ?", she asks back awkwardly. Inside her heart, Tifa prays that next conversation will not break up her relation with Aeris…and Cloud also.
Still in mysterious smile, Aeris replies, "Do you remember I ever asked you…to take care of him…for me…?". Aeris speaks almost in a whisper, she really meant what she said. Tifa stares at Aeris carefully, hoping that Aeris said wrong words since she does not expect her to tell such words. For some seconds, they both are in silence, not letting any words spoken. Aeris looks at Tifa intensely with nice smile paints her visage, while Tifa cannot hide her confused mind, clearly depicted on her expression.
"That..was…before you went to Sleeping Forest…", Tifa mumbles, her voice is rather shaking. She cannot forget that moment, when Aeris asked her to take care of Cloud in case something happened. At first, she could not understand what Aeris said…until she found the reality that her friend left them.
"Yes, I'm glad you still remember that", Aeris responds lightheartedly. Still in awkward tone, Tifa asks again with worried tone, "But…what's the matter with that ? Anything wrong ?".
Aeris only laughs softly. "No, nothing wrong about it…", she replies. "In fact, I owe a lot to you, Tifa….". She then turns her face to outside. There is nothing special there, Aeris just wants to turn her face away from Tifa for a reason. Tifa cannot understand what Aeris thinks. No matter how close they are, there are some things that Tifa cannot understand about Aeris. The Ancient girl is still mysterious to her eyes.
"I don't understand it, Aeris…You didn't owe me anything….", Tifa demands an explanation. Aeris shakes her head slowly. "No..Tifa…you've done a lot for me…for him…You've done things I couldn't do because I wasn't at this world that time….".
"Tifa…", Aeris pipes up, she then turns her face to Tifa again. "If it was not because of your patience and your caring…Cloud…he won't be like this….You really love him and care him very much…that's why I thank to you…You've fulfilled my wish, Tifa…". She takes a deep breath, and adds her previous words, "My sacrifice didn't go for nothing…I did it for other's happiness, other's life…and especially for him…so he could continue his life…and I'm sure he'll be in joy as long as you're beside him…". Aeris starts to feel something inside her heart. Something pain. No matter how hard she tries to ignore that feeling, she can still feel it.
"Now…", she continues, "Your step is only a week ahead, Tifa, I congratulate you….After that, you and he will be….forever…". Aeris finishes her words with low, yet rather trembling voice. Tifa can only watch her without saying anything. Being a woman, Tifa senses, and she is very sure, although Aeris speaks calmly, there is sadness and sorrow beneath her words. Moreover, she also senses that Aeris is a bit…jealous.
Tifa reflects the moment after Aeris died in her mind, how she and the rest were very sad. They mourned for her, but that was not really a worrying thing. It was him, Cloud, that made Tifa really worried. Since that day, he seemed depressed when nobody was around him. Whenever he was among the others, he acted normally, but Tifa could see hatred and anger were obviously depicted on his Mako-blue eyes when they fought their enemies, as if he wanted to satisfy his unresolved anger to real foe, Sephiroth. When they eventually stopped at Icicle Inn and watched the videotape of Aeris' childhood, Tifa noticed how Cloud's look changed. His eyes showed a deep missing, as well as sorrow beneath his soul. He tried very hard to conceal his feeling, but Tifa clearly saw how those Mako-blue eyes went softer and sad when he saw baby Aeris in the videotape. He really suffered because of Aeris' death, and worse, he kept it locked inside his heart, alone. No one could reach him, even Tifa, his childhood friend.
"Tifa…?". Aeris voice makes Tifa aware again from her own thought. "Are you all right ?", Aeris asks with concerned tone. Nodding her head slowly, Tifa then replies in low voice, "I'm okay, Aeris, thanks…I just…recall past memories…after you've gone…".
Eventually Aeris stands up from her chair and walks toward window. She just stops there, her head faces the sky through window glass. With her will, she tries to suppress her strange feeling, a feeling that pushes tears to her eyes. She succeeds holding tears even only to brim on her eyes, but she fails to ignore a strange feeling emerges inside her heart. Tifa watches Aeris' back with concerned look. She knows Aeris suffered a lot, and she should be happy after what she has done to save the others, but the fact is, her happiness is swallowed into the void. Worse, Tifa knows that she also plays role which carries away Aeris' happiness. Still, she asks for nothing from Tifa and the others.
"Aeris…", Tifa calls her friend as she stands up. She approaches Aeris who is still gazing outside. Tifa takes a deep breath before she speaks up.
"You…still love him…don't you ?". Careful enough not to dwell deeper in this sensitive thing, Tifa asked Aeris with very soft tone. Finally, she lets out a question which she always wants to deny its answer. Silence. As seconds passes, Tifa just watches Aeris' back. She knows it is much like rhetorical question, but she needs to know the answer, and she has to know it, now.
"Even my death can't fake it, Tifa….", finally Aeris replies in faint voice. Her body eventually chokes.
She still loves him. Poor girl…she must be holding her emotion…what should I do ? Tifa thinks sadly. She really wants to cheer up Aeris, like Aeris usually does to the others, but how could she ease someone whose happiness was lost because of her ? Tifa knows that in the past, she could not express her feeling clearly to Cloud like Aeris did. It made Aeris closer to him, and it also hurt her very much. She put her hope on Cloud and she had taken it for granted that Cloud would be hers, until suddenly Aeris came in, brought the same feeling as her toward him. When he was down because of Aeris' death, she tried her best to raise his spirit again, and it was very hard. Slowly, her patience finally yielded a result : Cloud proposed her. She once thought she was on top of the world, but then fact struck her again with Aeris' revival. Sure she was happy that her best friend was back although it also gave her worried feeling if she ever took Cloud from her, again. Now, when it is only a week to her wedding day, she starts to think about Aeris' condition. Tifa feels sorry for her, an unfortunate, yet caring and sweet flower girl. However, Tifa cannot see Cloud go away from her, she cannot bear it. She just loves him very much, just like Aeris does.
"I'm so sorry, Tifa….", suddenly Aeris says something. Slowly, she spins her body and faces Tifa again. Tifa looks at her friend with concerned and caring look. Staring at Tifa's ruby eyes, Aeris continues, "I'm sorry…but I can't lie to you…You're my best friend after all. I..I don't wanna hurt your feeling by telling you the truth…but…I just can't lie to you…". Aeris gives Tifa sorry look. From her expression, she does not seem to know how to answer Tifa's question without stepping further into this Cloud's matter.
Tifa holds Aeris' hands gently, with a tender look, she then says, "It's okay Aeris…Everyone has their own hearts…but…I want to say sorry too…". Aeris' eyes go wide, slightly surprised and puzzled. Before she can say anything, Tifa already adds, "I didn't seem to care your feeling several days ago…I just talk a lot about him, my wedding preparation, and everything else about him and me…right in front of you…You must think that I ignore your feeling…I should know that you still…love him…but I should treat you better…because you're my best friend…". Tifa sighs. "Maybe I was too excited after all…You know me…". Tifa does not know what to do next, but she knows she feels better after telling Aeris about her feeling.
"Thanks, Tifa". Aeris manages herself to smile, she wants to ease her friend. Her heart feels lighter knowing that Tifa is still like old days, still a kind woman. However, Aeris still has something that she needs to tell to Tifa.
"Tifa, I have another request…I hope I could rely on you", says Aeris. Tifa nods her head and responds, "Go on".
"Tomorrow, I'll have something to do…", Aeris explains, "It's a big thing for me, even though it's still unclear, I still know it's something I've got to do. I can only tell you that it is my responsibility as a Cetra, just like Vic".
"WHAT !!!???", Tifa cuts Aeris' words. Her eyes flash a completely disbelief look. "You and Vic…are Cetras…??". Aeris only smiles and nods her head. "Yeah…", she replies, "and he knew a lot about Cetra things I never knew before…Guess I'll get a D grade on my Cetra report…". Aeris giggles softly. Tifa is still stunned on her spot. Knowing that Vic is also a Cetra makes her very surprised. It means…Aeris would not be alone again. This fact triggers something in her head.
"Isn't he cute, Aeris ? And cool too…", Tifa asks Aeris with teasing tone. Aeris shrugs her shoulder with a funny expression on her face. "Hey…although we're Cetras, it doesn't mean we have something…We're just friends after all ! Come on Tifa…how could you think like that ?".
"All right..all right…you said it…", Tifa grins at Aeris, then continues, "but what's really happened ?". She starts to sense something big will be going on. Shaking her head, Aeris replies, "I don't know…Everything is still unclear to me…Vic seems to hide it from me…I don't get idea why he's doing that, but I'm sure he is a good guy after all".
"We should accompany you then !", Tifa exclaims. As Aeris already knows Tifa will say it, Aeris responds quickly, "I think it's better if you leave this matter to me and Vic. No offense Tifa, but this is Cetra's matter…I don't even know what to do…I just…don't want to get you into trouble anymore….".
Tifa wants to protest her decision, but after thinking Aeris' explanation for a moment, finally she nods her head and responds, "Well…if that's your decision…just call us whenever you need a hand, okay ?".
"Sure", Aeris replies shortly. After a short moment of silence, she speaks again, her tone turns into serious one. "Tifa, I don't know whether I'd be back when it's all over…". Aeris stops her words for a moment. Mentioning 'when it's all over' means that she would be back..to Lifestream. Tifa keeps quiet, listening carefully for next words. Aeris clears her throat, then continues, "You will have nothing to worry anymore…Just live your life to the fullest Tifa, okay ?". Aeris spins her body, facing outside again. There, night is getting darker but somehow she can enjoy it.
"And….please take care of him…for me…again….", she murmurs. Mixed emotions play inside her heart.
"Aeris ?", Tifa tries to inquiry her condition. She feels like dejavu, this is something ever happened in the past.
"Just promise me Tifa…please…". Aeris pleads to Tifa with shaking voice, yet in a whisper. Tifa takes a breath, and then lets out a sigh. She is very sure now that something will be going on, and she must admit that she is afraid if something terrible happens again.
"All right…please take care yourself too….", she finally responds with low voice. However, she cannot let Aeris face the new danger on her own. No, there is still Vic, but Tifa, and she is sure the others will do, cannot let her go again, whatever the reason is.
"Thank you Tifa…I know I can rely on you…", Aeris turns her body to face Tifa again. She smiles while saying her words, but Tifa captures sadness, yet also happiness beneath her emerald green eyes. They are all covered with mysterious nuance emitted from her.
…………………
Aeris is alone on her room now, watching the stars sparkle their light, decorating night sky with array of beautiful silver light. Finally she did it. Since she knew that Cloud and Tifa has been engaged, she must prepare herself to say goodbye. No matter how she kept her love, the fact showed to her that she could not get close to Cloud like old times Now, with this circumstance, she found a reason to wave her friends a farewell…and maybe true farewell. She has asked Tifa to take care of Cloud, and it made her heart better.
"Cloud…", she murmurs. She wants to meet him once again for final farewell, but she is unsure whether it is a good thing to do. She is afraid if she meets him, she would not be able to leave him …again.
I'm going to save Planet and world again…especially you…This is my fate Cloud…and fate forked us with different destiny…We…can't be together…but if you ask my heart, you'll find your name carved there deeply….Cloud…be happy…be with Tifa…love her like you'd lost her…she loves you very much…and she deserves you better than I do.
Aeris catches a glimpse of silver light from a bright star in the sky. She smiles.
Cloud…I love you…always….
AUTHOR'S POST-CHAPTER NOTE :
My gawd ! Those girls met ! Heehee…what 'bout that, readers ? About Aeris, there's something I need to explain. Since the beginning of the original game, I caught Aeris' character as a sweet and caring person, but actually she was having her own trouble (that's why I love her !). At the game, she was close to Cloud, and I didn't doubt about it, because she loved him for sure. I guessed Aeris was expressive character, so when she cared about someone, she just showed it. In this matter, it was about her affection to Cloud. Now, after she was revived in my fanfic, I was rather in doubt how to re-develop her character. She had experienced death, and she finally realized how Tifa, her best friend, loved Cloud. Surely these aspects lead her to be more mature. On the other side, she couldn't stop her feeling toward Cloud, so I tried to balance her character as sweet and caring person she used to be (that was her real character, right ?), and a thankful person because she has grown mature after experiencing death before. Hope that could explain more about my characters development in this fanfic.
Thanks for your attention ! ^_^. Any reviews will be highly recommended…heheheee…