"Citizen Mogul"
Script for five pages
Characters for this story:
Mog-ul /Mammoth Mogul: He won't be appearing in his modern "Mammoth Mogul" form until the end of this story, so the focus is on his younger self instead. Mog-ul is part of a peaceful village of Mobian hunters. These are simple hunter-gatherers, struggling for survival in a world that's out to get them. Mog-ul himself wears a typical "caveman" costume stitched together from the skins of different animals, and sports long, braided hair (like Mammoth Mogul does now, when he's drawn right). He is the strongest in his tribe, and should be significantly larger than anyone else. Mog-ul is still young and innocent, and should have much softer features that his future self. Much unlike his future self, Mog-ul is essentially a well-meaning "dumb jock".
Agra- Mog-ul's girlfriend and the daughter of the tribal chief. Agra is essentially a primitive squirrel-creature, and has just the slightest resemblance to Princess Sally (enough to indicate Agra might be her ancestor, but don't go overboard and make Agra look like Sally in a previous life). She tends to be bubbly and enthusiastic around Mog-ul, but has her wits more about her the rest of the time. She is a hunter, like Mog-ul, and probably a skilled one judging from how the other hunters treat her.
Prehistoric Mobian hunters, 1 and 2- The other hunters in the tribe are pretty standard fare. Try to make them look like primitive animals.
PAGE ONE
(1) This panel is 2/3 of a page. All the panels, until further notice, should have very thin, light edges. The majority of this story is a flashback. Mog-ul and Agra are wading through some tall grass, followed by 2 unnamed hunters. A dense forest can be seen in the background to the left. The sun is well in the sky; it's a little after midday, so we can see everything fully. This is a pure and pristine world, utterly wild, untouched by civilization. Agra (dressed in stitched together animal skins) is speaking to Mog-ul, who is walking in the lead with a dull, uninterested look. Agra on the other hand should have a more thoughtful, animated expression. All four hunters are carrying spears. I'd prefer not to have the other two hunters look like any major characters we know, but if you want to make them look like ancestors of some of the more obscure characters, feel free.
TITLE: (BANNER AT TOP) Citizen Mogul
CAPTION: Then.
1 Mog-ul: ...more strange lights in the skies yesterday. Your father says they are a good omen for the games tomorrow.
2 Agra: Finding something to eat would be a better omen. Those lights scared away most of the game. Anyway, you don't need good omens for the games.
3 Mog-ul: Hurm? Do you think so, Agra?
4 Agra: Don't be silly, Mog-ul! You're the strongest in the tribe--
(2) There's a row of three panels across the bottom. The first is a shot of Agra, wrapping her arms around Mog-ul's free arm and leaning on him. She's seriously in love with the guy and it should show. Mog-ul (who towers over her and is mostly off-panel) should have a slightly surprised expression as she does this.
5 Agra: --you'll win the games easily, and then we can get married. Everyone knows it.
6 Mog-ul: I sure hope so.
(3)Close up on Mog-ul. He looks worried.
7 Mog-ul: But what if I don't? Only a champion of the games can marry the chief's daughter.
(4) The frame centers on Agra, who is laughing, not taking his question seriously, with the other two hunters visible (faded) behind her.
8 Agra: Even if you weren't the strongest you'd still win. Nobody would be stupid enough to get between me and my man!
9 Hunter 1: That's for sure!
10 Hunter2: I know I wouldn't risk my life…
PAGE TWO
(1) Mog-ul suddenly flings both arms out, stopping the other shocked hunters behind him. The shot is slightly overhead, with the hunters in the lower left corner. Over Mog-ul's shoulders we can see a massive green gem (it's a chaos emerald), as large as a man's head, imbedded in a crater in the ground, glowing and humming ominously. It's vibrating very slightly (just a few tiny motion squiggles should do the trick). The SFX font should be so small you could miss it if you're not careful.
SFX (chaos emerald): Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…
1 Mog-ul: WAIT!
(2) The hunters are in the background, bending over to see under Mog-ul's arms. Mog-ul is obviously scared by what he sees, the others are just curious. The chaos emerald is in the foreground, and looks very large compared to the hunters due to perspective. SFX font is still almost illegibly small.
2 Hunter 1: By the spirits! What is that thing?
3 Agra: It looks like a polished stone… but look how it shines!
SFX (chaos emerald): Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…
(3) Mog-ul lays his massive hand gently on Agra's shoulder, and she looks up at him. Mog-ul still looks worried.
4 Mog-ul: Agra… this scares me. We should leave this.
(4) Agra is putting her hands on her hips and yelling at Mog-ul, who has his head bowed, obviously cowed by her.
5 Agra: It's just some sort of stone! It can't hurt us. Honestly, you're all muscle and no brain. When will you learn to think?
6 Mog-ul: Sorry. I'll do whatever you say.
(5) Zoom in, centering on Agra's face. She's just gotten a really mischievous look.
7 Agra: Whatever I say, huh?
PAGE THREE
(1) This panel is about 1/5 the height of the page, and the entire width. Agra, still grinning, is pointing at Mog-ul, who's got a "who, me?" look on his face. The other two hunters are behind him, smiling widely. Hunter 1 is whispering to Hunter 2, so a whisper balloon is needed.
1 Agra: Then I say… that you carry the rock back to the village, as a gift for our wedding!
2 Hunter 1 (whispering): Ha! That's telling the big baby!
(2) This panel is about 1/2 the remaining height and 1/3 its width. Mog-ul is standing on front of the emerald, still looking very frightened. The emerald is still glowing and humming.
SFX (gem): Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…
(3) This panel is about a quarter of the remaining height, and takes the remaining third of page width (the next panel, below it, will be identical). Close up of Mog-ul's face, sweat is beading on his forehead. The font for the SFX should be larger than before, and should extend all along the bottom of the panel.
SFX (emerald): Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…
(4) This panel is about a quarter of the remaining height, and takes the remaining third of page width (identical to the panel above). Close up of Mog-ul's trembling hand, about to touch the vibrating emerald. The font of the SFX should be larger still, and should extend all along the bottom of the panel.
SFX (emerald): HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM…
(5) This panel takes up the remaining room on the page. There has obviously been an explosion, but no SFX are needed. Keep it a silent panel. Mog-ul is at the left, his back to us, being thrown back by the force of the explosion, his hand still held out on front of him, his clothes being ripped and torn, gem fragments flying in all directions. Be as creative as you want with the explosion to get the feel across (use speed lines, the Kanji for "boom", or whatever), but don't make it look too big (the other hunters aren't going to be caught in it). The entire panel should be bathed in green, except for a white smudge at "ground zero" where the emerald used to be.
PAGE FOUR
(1) This is seen from Mog-ul's POV. One of those shots where you not only see through his eye, but also see a little of his eyelid as well. Everything (except the eyelid) is still bathed in green, although a lighter shade than we saw during the explosion so we canstart to see other colors a little underneath it. Agra is running toward the viewer (Mog-ul), dropping her spear in the process. She is clearly terrified, even crying a little (she hasn't had the time to produce many tears though, so don't go overboard). She is screaming.
1 Agra: Mog-ul!
(2)This is again seen from Mog-ul's POV, his eyelid closing almost halfway now (which gives you less room to draw in, sorry), and things are getting fuzzy and indistinct. Agra's face is filling his view, she's crying more heavily now, and screaming louder. The green glow is extremely muted now, almost entirely gone. The font for Agra's balloon should be larger than in the last panel, but blurred to show he's having trouble hearing.
2 Agra: MOG-UL!
(3) Black panel. Mog-ul's eyes have closed.
(4) Next line of the page. This takes up the entire width, and about the second third of the height. We've shifted locations now, to inside a small, crudely made tent of animal skins. It's poorly lit by a fire on the ground. There are also some animal skins and crude tools scattered on the ground. On the right is Mog-ul, staring into nothingness (diagonally out and toward the viewer's right shoulder or so) fingering a large green emerald fragment embedded in his chest. It's glowing very faintly. Agra is standing a little behind and to the left, clasping her hands, tears in her eyes, not directly facing Mogul but watching what he does out of the corner of her eyes. Her font for the last balloon in this scene should be a whisper, very small, subdued.
3 Agra: Mog-ul.
4 Agra: Father won't change his mind. The stone scares people. He won't banish you, if you leave freely.
5 Agra: We can't be married.
6 Agra: …I'm so sorry…
(5) Final third of the page's height, 1 third the width. We only see the shadows that Mog-ul and Agra are casting on the tent's wall, and the word balloons are coming from the shadows. Agra is looking at the ground, Mog-ul has his back to her and is looking forward.
7 Mog-ul: But… I can still play in the games! I've never felt stronger!
8 Agra: No. That won't work.
(6) Close up on Mog-ul's face. His eyes are clamped very tightly shut. We can see Agra behind him, still staring at the ground, not looking at him. No dialogue.
(7) Identical to the last panel, except Mog-ul's eyes are open, and Agra's head is snapping up in shock. Mog-ul looks like man losing the very last of his hope.
9 Mog-ul: Will you… come with me?
PAGE FIVE
(1) Agra is looking to the right and down, avoiding eye contact. There are more tears in her eyes, and she's practically hugging herself. Panel is aligned left.
1 Agra: ….
2 Agra: …I can't. I'm not as strong as you. I wouldn't survive.
(2) Another close up of Mogul's face, like on the last page. His eyes are closed tight again, his expression unreadable. It might be anger, grief, confusion, or any number of things. Behind Mog-ul Agra is staring at him with tears streaming down her face. Panel is aligned right. This panel and the one below it, combined, are as high as panel 1.
3 Mog-ul: And is survival all that is important?
(3) Agra is going through the tent-flap, running out of the tent, one arm pushing the flap, the fore-arm of the other covering her face. Align right. This panel and Panel 2 are as large as panel 1.
(4) This takes up just a sliver of the page's bottom, only as much room as is absolutely needed. It's an extreme close up on Mog-ul's face, he's closing his eye tight again.
(5) Giant shot of Mammoth Mogul is his modern garb, taking up whatever space is left. His shirt has been unbuttoned in order to show the gem embedded in his chest. He looks far more intelligent and harsh than his younger self. In the facets of the gem we can see multiple identical images of Agra's face. Mammoth Mogul is staring right at the viewer against a pitch black background, only illuminated by the green glow of the chaos emerald.
Caption, located bottom right (where a "The End" caption might be found): Now.