Chapter 2
"So, you're telling me that *you* are the real Buffy and that other bint is some sort of imposter?" Spike said while looking skeptically at Buffy. He had more sanity in his eyes now and was no longer cowering on the floor, but was actually sitting straddle legged in a student desk chair he had scavenged, arms folded over the back. "No offense love, but I don't know if I can believe that, after all I have been riding the ole crazy train for the past few months. How do I know you're not the imposter."
"Because Spike, you know me. You know me better than anyone and if I can't make you believe me, no one else will."
Spike looked at her intensely searching for the truth. She certainly did look like Buffy, the same beautiful face, trendy clothes, gorgeous hair. He wanted to believe this was her. He was so lonely, in so much pain, he needed it to be her. But something in his mind still wouldn't let him fully accept it. "Why don't you just call up the Scooby gang….have the whelp and the witch rush in and save you?"
"I can't call them up. I'm stuck here, I can't leave." Buffy was starting to sound desperate.
"I'll just go get them then", Spike said simply.
"Spike, you know they won't believe you." She moved closer to him placing her hands on this crossed arms. "Honey, they think you are evil or insane… or both really. Besides, they think the other one is me and if it finds out that I'm trying to get help, a lot of people are going to get hurt. That is why I need you to keep this a secret until we can find a way to let the others know what is happening." Buffy paused dramatically and raised her hand to stroke Spike's cheek "Then, we can be together like we're meant to be."
"You want to be with me? After what I did? What would make you decide that, nothing I've ever said has convinced you before." Spike finished this with a laugh, "now I know I'm hearing things again."
"Spike, maybe I deserved what you did. I've realized…"
"What! Bloody hell woman, don't ever say such a thing. You deserve better than that! Better than I could ever give you. That's why I got this bleeding soul… to be what you deserved… to be the kind of man that would never do… that… to a lady." He still couldn't bring himself to utter the word 'rape' it was too ugly, too close to the horrible reality of what he almost did to the woman he loved.
"That's what I'm trying to say Spike. You have your soul back now and I can trust you. Maybe I didn't deserve what you tried to do, but we both know how cruel I was to you. I just didn't want to admit that I could love a creature like you. But now you have your soul back and I don't have that excuse anymore. It's time for me to admit how I feel. I can't imagine being with anyone else …you are my everything. You were right all along… you knew… we were meant for each other." Tears were now streaming down her face. "But, I've screwed it up, I was so cruel to you. You left and I needed you to help with Willow, I needed you so badly… but, it was my fault you weren't there, I pushed you away. Now, I've been stuck in this hell hole since then and I thought I would be here forever, until you came back. But, I guess I've pushed you too far this time and I'll be alone here forever."
By the time Buffy finished her words were barely intelligible through her sobbing. Spike felt like someone was squeezing his undead heart. How could he not know this was really Buffy. He stood up pushing the chair away and pulled Buffy into his arms. Her small body went limp against him as he comforted her. "Shh love, s'okay, you're not alone. I'm here and I'm going to do whatever I have to do to get you out of here. Just tell me what you need love…. anything, you know I'd do anything for you" he whispered into her hair.
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Xander had been asked by his boss to check out the basement of the school. Apparently there were 'surprise, surprise' strange noises coming from down there. His boss thought it might be a gas or a water leak and had asked Xander to check it out. Xander didn't really expect to find anything, not anything that his construction skills could fix anyway, but he couldn't really explain that to the boss man. Xander figured he would look in on Spike (who was probably the source of a lot of the strangeness) and ask him if he had noticed anything. As Xander got closer to the area where Spike usually lurked he heard Spike's voice. It sounded like he was having a conversation with someone but he couldn't hear another voice. Xander eased open the door in time to see Spike appearing to 'hug' thin air. "Wonderful, he thought. Spike is just the picture of mental health today. I'm not even going near that." Xander then eased the door shut again, unnoticed by the vampire. He needed to tell Buffy that she had to get Spike out of that basement. It looked like the freak had half destroyed his "room" and Xander wasn't looking forward to weekly spackling sessions to cover up the holes Dead Boy punched in the walls. Besides, it couldn't be a good thing to have a lunatic vampire, neutered or not, hanging out in the basement of the high school. It had to be against health codes or something.
Xander turned his car onto Revello Drive. He was not looking forward to talking to Buffy. They hadn't spoken in several days, not since she tried to kill Anya. Xander still felt betrayed by Buffy, even though Anya was alive. How could Buffy be so cold? I mean, yeah, she had given the whole speech about killing Angel but this was different, at least in his mind it was. It wasn't like Anya was trying to destroy the world or anything. Maybe he was being too hard on Buffy or too easy on Anya, he didn't know which. As he turned off the ignition and got out of the car, he decided to try and put the whole thing behind them. After all, Anya was alive and he and Buffy had been through a lot together.
Dawn answered the door, immediately warning Xander to be wary of her sister. "If you've come to see *her* you might want to think twice because someone sure pissed in her cornflakes this morning." Dawn said the last part overly loud obviously hoping Buffy would hear.
"What's wrong Dawnster, did you get caught stealing her favorite sweater again?" Xander smiled, trying to lighten the mood in his usual way.
"No, much worse. I put dishes in the sink without rinsing them first." Dawn said this with mock horror, ending with the patented rolling of her eyes.
"Yeah, Anya used to get on me for that. Said she'd actually put on the old vengeance for lazy husbands who did it. So you'd better be careful." Xander grabbed Dawn in a half hug and mussed her hair affectionately. "I'll go get her highness for you", Dawn replied grinning.
Buffy sighed inwardly when Dawn came up to her room to tell her Xander was downstairs. She didn't have the energy to argue with him about Anya anymore. What was done was done and Anya was no longer a demon and as long as she stayed that way Buffy had no interest in harming her. Of course, she was sure Xander thought she was still gunning for her. She really couldn't believe that Xander thought she was that cold, but then again she had tried to kill his beloved… mass murdering demon or not. Buffy pulled on her robe and started out of her room, she had hoped to catch a nap before patrol, but apparently that wasn't going to happen. She wouldn't have been able to sleep anyway she reasoned. Either she had horrible nightmares of the hell mouth opening and girls being murdered or she lay awake worrying about that and her job and her sister and, well everything.
"Hey Xand" she tried to bring some cheeriness into her voice and pretend that the ugliness a couple of days ago never happened. "Dawn said you needed to see me about something."
"Yeah it's about the evil dead guy who lives in the basement of the school." Xander was also trying hard not to sound as uncomfortable as he felt.
"What did Spike do now?" Buffy bit out, fatigue and frustration evident in her tone.
"Nothing, I mean he hasn't killed anybody or anything. He's just got to get out of the school and go back to his crypt or something. He's made a huge mess down there and I'm so not getting the warm fuzzies about cleaning up after him. Besides, you know he's crazy not to mention a vampire and it's probably not a good idea for him to be around all those young impressionable kids. He might start them smoking or something you know" Xander tried to gain a laugh from Buffy but failed, she just stared at him blank eyes.
"I know, we have to do something about him." Buffy sighed audibly this time. "I'm just not sure what yet, I can't reason with him and I think Clem has pretty much permanently moved into his old crypt. He doesn't really have anywhere to go either and I'm not sure Spike is exactly roommate material right now, he could probably give Kathy a run for her money on the annoying-demon-roommate front." Buffy rubbed her temples and slumped on the couch. "I'll think of something Xander, I promise, I'll talk to him again tomorrow. Now, I hate to be rude, but I've got to try and get some sleep before I go out on patrol or I'm going to end up being the slay-ee instead of the slay-er. You're welcome to hang around as long as you want though. Dawn could probably use the company. Willow went to the grocery store yesterday, so we actually have food. She has a night class so she won't be around until about 9:30 but like I said you're welcome to wait on her."
"That's cool" Xander said to Buffy's back and she started out of the room and up the stairs to her bed. "Buff?"
"Yeah Xander" , Buffy said trying hard not to hide her annoyance.
"Is there something wrong? I mean do you need help with something?"
"No", she replied "it's nothing that a little sleep can't fix." With that she proceeded up the stairs leaving a very puzzled and concerned Xander staring after her.