Chapter 6

Buffy switched the knob on the washer over to 'hot', the clothes would probably fade, but the cold and gentle cycle just wasn't gonna cut it this time.   The house had been empty when she got home, Dawn and Will must have gone to the store or something.  She was kind of glad because Spike was acting awfully twitchy and she didn't know if he could handle anyone else at the moment.  She had sent him to the bathroom with explicit instructions to leave his dirty clothes outside the door and shower thoroughly.  He had almost balked when she led him up to the bathroom.  She had to admit it was awkward for her too, but she decided it was best to pretend that *it* had never happened, hoping her casual attitude would rub off on him and put him somewhat at ease. 

The word 'dirty' didn't seem to cover the condition of the clothes he had been wearing.  She was surprised they hadn't stood up and walked down to the laundry room with her of their own accord.  As it was, she had held them at arms length afraid the smell would rub off on her.  She had left Spike a pair of Riley's old sweat pants that he had left behind and an oversized Doublemeat t-shirt her boss had given her as a thanks for working an unscheduled double shift… big yay there.   

Buffy picked up the bottle of bleach and pondered adding it to the water as well, but thought better of it, instead she poured about twice the usual amount of detergent into the machine before throwing in Spike's shirt and jeans.  About that time she heard the front door open and Dawn and Willow's voices.  She hurried up the stairs, hoping to head them off before they ran into Spike.

Buffy rushed into the kitchen.  "Will… Dawn.. What's up?  Where ya been?"

"Oh, hey Buff we didn't know you'd be here.  Thought you had to work tonight", Willow said.

Willow barely managed to sit the bag of groceries she was carrying down on the countertop before Dawn started rummaging through it, coming out with a bag of chips.

"No, no Doublemeat tonight.  Just Slayer duty." 

Buffy stopped, not sure how to broach the subject of Spike being upstairs in the shower.  Dawn then started speaking, her mouth full of chips.

"We went to get some junk food.  We both have a big test tomorrow and Willow says it helps you study better if you eat as many refined sugars and starches as possible."

"Well, I guess Will always was the brainy one."

Buffy was so happy to see Dawn and Willow getting along again.  Things had been so strained when Willow had first come back.  But they really seemed to be working things out.  Now if she could just get Spike back on track, she might have her little family back together again.

"Guys, I need to talk to you about something."

"What's up Buff?", Willow queried.

"Yeah, do you need us to help patrol tonight?  I've been practicing."  Dawn had a hopeful look on her face.

"No, it's not that and besides didn't you just say you have a big test tomorrow?"

"Well yeah, but that's not as important as saving the world from demons.  I mean, duh."

"Well, speaking of demons…"

Before Buffy could finish her sentence they heard a decidedly irritated British accent coming from upstairs.

"You've got to be bloody kidding me.  Slayer, I'm not wearin this!"

"Yes you are", Buffy yelled toward the upstairs, she then turned back to Willow and Dawn.  "That's Spike",she said, stating the obvious.

"I kinda figured that, what with the accent and.. and the cursing."

"What's he doing here?!" Dawn snapped, cutting off Willow.

"Dawn, I had to get him out of the school basement, it was driving him crazy."

"So you brought him here?!"

"No Dawn, I… I just brought him by for a shower… and some clean clothes.  He's going back to his crypt."

Dawn folded her arms in front of her, glaring at Buffy.

"Buffy, what's going on here?"

"Dawn, there's some things you just don't understand."

"Explain it to me then."

Buffy looked at Willow, looking for someone to save her, but Willow looked just as interested in getting and explanation as Dawn did.  She couldn't start in on the soul thing that would just open a huge can of worms.  One that was better left closed as long as Spike was upstairs.  Time to stall.

"Dawn, I'll explain it all to you later.  Just… just be decent okay.  Don't threaten him… or… or anything.  He'll be gone soon."

"You're unbelievable you know that?!  I only threatened him because I was worried about *you* and now you're..."

"Dawn, I'm not saying … I'm not trying to come down on you.  I'm just asking you to be civil, you don't have to be his best friend."

"Yeah, like he was *ever* my friend to begin with."

Dawn spun around, prepared to make yet another dramatic exit when she almost collided with Spike.  He was standing barefooted at the entrance to the kitchen boots in hand, clearly uncomfortable, and looking lost in Riley's large sweat pants and the X-large Doublemeat t-shirt. 

"Maybe, I should just go now Slayer.  Thanks for the hospitality and all.  Don't want to upset the Bit."

"You're not upsetting me," Dawn said, her tone making a liar out of her.  "You can stay here as long as you want.  Can I get you something?  Some blood… one of Buffy's sweaters maybe?"

"Dawn!  Go upstairs now!  We'll talk about this later."

Spike watched Dawn's hasty exit, stung by her words.  He couldn't really blame her for hating him so much, but it hurt…a lot.  She seemed okay though, still fiery as ever.  She obviously wasn't takin any guff off this imposter for sure.  He was proud of her and he noticed she certainly had grown over the summer.

"Spike?"

It was Willow.  Spike turned his head from the empty doorway where he had just watched Dawn go.

"Red."

"How… how are you?  You look better… I mean."

"You mean I don't smell like a gut wagon?"

"Well, it certainly is an improvement."

Willow was looking at him intensely.  Spike didn't like it.  It was like she could see through him… like Anya had.  He looked away, fixing his eyes on the floor."

"W…Well I have a test I've gotta study for.  Gotta keep those grades up."  Willow was trying to sound casual and cheerful, but she knew she had seen something.  There was something different about Spike and she was pretty sure Buffy knew what it was.  She'd give Buffy an opportunity to tell her about it later, for now though, she thought it was best to stay out of the way.

After Willow had left the room.  Buffy tried to gloss over the scene Dawn had caused.

"Teenagers huh? 

Spike just shrugged, and looked at his feet.

"It's gonna be another 30 minutes or so until your clothes are done.  I was just about to go put them in the dryer. You wanna watch some t.v. or something while you wait?"

"No, Bu… Slayer… like I said, I think it's time for me to get going.  Don't really belong here."

He took a seat at the kitchen table and began lacing his boots on his sockless feet. 

"But, your clothes.  You need…"

"If you don't care, I'll just wear these.  I've got other clothes in m'crypt.  I'll bring these back to you later if you want."

"Well, if you insist we'll go" Buffy said uncertainly.

"You don't have to go with me Slayer.  I'll be a good lad.  Back to my crypt like a good little vampire."

"Spike, no offence, but I'm going with you.  I'm not gonna just let you go back to the school and hole up in a corner again."

"Whatever you say Slayer."

*********

If the silence had been awkward on their walk to her house then this silence was excruciating.  Buffy knew that Spike was really hurt by what Dawn had said.  She didn't blame Dawn.  It wasn't like her reaction wasn't normal and justified.  She'd have to follow through on her promise to explain everything to her, then maybe her attitude would change.

Spike didn't know how long it would be before his façade of sanity cracked wide open.  The scene with Dawn had burned him, there was no denying that, but he'd expected it.  It was Buffy… or 'it' that was causing the problem.  She'd told him 'it' was good, but holy hell!  The thing even acted like Buffy.  He had even found himself being sucked into the usual banter that he and Buffy used to share.  He had to keep reminding himself that this was not Buffy.  It was just trying to get close to him….make sure he wasn't a threat.

Finally after what seemed like ages, they reached the crypt.  Buffy followed Spike in.  The place was empty, at Buffy's urging Clem had decided to stay in his old apartment above Willie's, he'd planned to check in on Spike the next day after giving his friend a chance to settle in.  Very little had changed since Spike had left, the only indication of Clem's stay was a half eaten bag of Cheetos he'd left on the couch. Spike immediately surveyed the room, looking for something to drink… something stiff.  He thought he'd left a bottle here and Clem wasn't exactly the hard liquor type so it was probably still around.  Buffy perched uncomfortably on the edge of the couch, moving the Cheeto bag out of her way.

"So, looks pretty much the same.  Thought maybe Clem would do some redecorating… bring in some color."

"You still here Slayer?"  He said this with an acid tone not even looking at her.  He was determined to shut it out, make it go away. He was afraid if it didn't leave soon he would either snap or let everything slip or both.

"I was just… I just wanted to tell you something."

"Yeah, well can't you tell me later?  I've got some settlin' in to do and …."

"Spike, please this is important.  I know… I know this whole thing has been very hard on you.  I just wanted you to know that I forgive you… for what you… what you tried to do.  You have your soul back now and things are different.  I just didn't want you to torture yourself over it anymore… it… it wasn't you."

How dare she!  This stupid bitch was really trying to get to him.  Forgiving him!  Suppose she thought he'd fall at her feet ready to do her bidding at any moment.  Well, he wasn't that bloody stupid.

"Of course Slayer.  It's always all about you itn't it?  No matter how many people I slaughtered… the destruction I've caused.   Spike's going to be a-ok now that the Slayer has forgiven him for trying to force his way past her dimpled knees.  Thank you Slayer, I… I don't know what would have become of me without your generosity."

"You son of a bitch.  I can't believe… what the hell is your problem?!  I was trying to *help* you." 

Buffy stared at him dumbfounded and hurt.  He was determined to squash any efforts toward repairing their relationship.  Well, to hell with him, she thought heading for the door. 

"I should have just left you in that god damned basement to rot!  You ungrateful bastard!"  Buffy gave him one hateful glare and slammed the door shut, leaving the crypt.

"What's wrong Slayer, I thought all was forgiven?"  Spike yelled as she slammed the door.

**********

"Stupid worthless undead son of a bitch!"

With that Buffy staked the fledgling she'd found in the last cemetery on her nightly rounds.  He was the only vamp she'd been able to find that night and she was itching for a good fight to work off some of her frustrations.  She still couldn't believe Spike had said that to her.  For weeks it had been all "I hurt the girl, poor me, I'm a crazy bastard, please help me."  She tries to give him a little help, offer up an olive branch and what does he do?  He shows his true colors is what.  No more feeling guilty over him… screw him… she had more pressing things to worry about anyway.  Namely the hell mouth and these guys in robes who seemed to like to kill people in her dreams.  Let Spike rot in his crypt for all she cared.

Buffy stomped up the walk to her house.  She'd never get to sleep tonight with all the adrenaline rushing through her body, not that she ever got any sleep anyway.  When she went in, Dawn and Willow were sitting at the kitchen table, books spread out in front of them.

"A little late for you guys to still be studying isn't it?" Buffy asked.

"We were just talking, we're about to pack it in though."  Willow smiled at Buffy, trying to keep things cheerful.  She was hoping there wouldn't be another scene like there was earlier.  Dawn was still pretty angry and determined to wait up for Buffy, so she could get her 'explanation'.  Willow admitted that she too was very interested in hearing what Buffy had to say.

"So are you going to explain about Spike?"  Dawn said matter of factly.

"There's nothing to explain.  He's insane, he doesn't need to be living in the school, so I took him back to his crypt.  End of story."

Buffy then spun around, leaving the room in what was a wonderful impersonation of Dawn's earlier exit.

Dawn narrowed her eyes, looking at Willow.

"See, I told you.  It's always the same story.  She never tells me anything."

Willow frowned, not knowing what to say to Dawn.  Because in this instance she knew Dawn was right.  Buffy was hiding something and she intended to find out what.