Disclaimer: Zoe doesn't own anything except this fic and herself!
~~~
Zoe: -comes running onto the stage in a Princess Zelda outfit- WHOOOOOOOOOOSH! -skids to a halt- I AM HERE! AND YOU ARE NOT! :P
Yugi: I'm here!
Bakura: Dolts! All of you! I mean, I'm here!
Ryou: ^_^
Kaiba: I'm here!
Mai: I'm here!
Yami: I'm here!
Zoe: HOLY UNDERWEAR! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM, YAMI?! I haven't seen you, like, since my last fic or somethin'...
Yami: I have my ways of getting around.
Bakura: Zoe! You dolt! What are you wearing?
Zoe: what's it look like I'm wearing, BAKAra?! It's my Halloween outfit!
Joey: -comes staggering in, with Selena hanging onto his leg- Wasn't Halloween, like, 4 months ago?
Zoe: DO NOT TELL MY FRAGILE LITTLE MIND THAT! IT STILL THINKS IT'S OCTOBER!!
Selena: -stands up and dusts off herself- Thanks for the ride, Joey-kins! ^_^
Ryou: ^_^
Zoe: Now, now, Ryou! Selena can use the expression "^_^" if she wants to!
Ryou: ^_^
Joey: -nods to Selena and wanders off to...do Joey things-
Peanut Butter: -sees that the Joey things were eating his own deck- Joey! No! Bad!
Selena: -runs up to PB and gets in his face- What did you say?!
Peanut Butter: Mr. Bigglesworth?
Selena: Thought so. -runs over to Joey and takes his Flame Swordsmen and begins to eat it-
Joey: No! I wanted to eat that! -takes it from Selena-
Selena: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR! -grows real big and looks down on Joey- You were saying?
Joey: -faints-
Selena: OH MY GOD! I KILLED JOEY!
Bakura: You bast--
Zoe: Bakura! Not in front of the kids!
Bakura: Oh, sorry...
Yugi: Acunamata! It's a wonderful phrase, acunamata! Our days are problem-free!
Yami: It means no worries, for the rest of our days...
Yugi: Yeah, sing it, kid!
Yami: KID?! WHO YOU BE CALLIN' KID, SHORTY?!
Yugi: -whines- Don't call me short!
Zoe: Uhh, guys--
Yami: -glares-
Zoe: OH! EXCUUUUUUSE ME! Guys and Pharoahs, what was that whole "Lion King" thing about?
Yugi: -shrugs-
Yami: -shrugs-
Zoe: Holy crap! We have to get to our couple!
Mai: Who says so? I dun wanna go out with Kaiba!
Kaiba: -in his mind- Awwwww...but...I love you, Mai! But wait, I also love Joey...I MEAN NO! NO! WHAT AM I THINKING?! -outloud- And you think I want to, either, Valentine?
Zoe: -reaches towards the "If I push this button you fall down the hole right underneath you and pay a visit to Pegasus who is wearing nothing but Fuzzy Orange Thongs on his head" button- You were saying?
Mai: When do we start?
Kaiba: I'll get my car!
Zoe: That's better...So, commercial break! NOW!
At the Commercial Break in Commercial Break land…
Peggy: Hello, fans!
Myranda: *drools*
Crickets: *chirp chirp chirp*
Peggy: Today on the Wine Network, we'll be making red wine! So tune in to Channel 1 and watch and learn!
Myranda: *changes the channel to channel 1*
Channel 1: This show has been cancelled due to Zoe Moto. Please tune into Channel 2 to watch and learn on Peggy's Wine Network
Myranda: *turns to Channel 2*
Channel 2: This show has been cancelled due to Zoe Moto. Please tune into Channel 1 to watch and learn on Peggy's Wine Network
Myranda: *turns to Channel 1*
Channel 1: This show has been cancelled due to Zoe Moto. Please tune into Channel 2 to watch and learn on Peggy's Wine Network.
Myranda: *turns to Channel 2*
Channel 2: This show has been cancelled due to Zoe Moto. Please tune into Channel 1 to watch and learn on Peggy's Wine Network
Myranda: *turns to Channel 1*
Channel 1: This show has been cancelled due to Zoe Moto. Please tune into Channel 2 to watch and learn on Peggy's Wine Network.
End of Commercial Break
Zoe: And…we're back!
Yami: Why do you always say, "And… we're back!"?
Zoe: Mmm…good question. I dunno. So, now, who were our couples again? –sits back in her chair and it flips over- OOF!
Random Hobo Employee: -laughs at Zoe-
Zoe: YAY! I didn't know I had Random Hobo Employees! ^_^ I mean…OFF WITH YOUR HEAD! DON'T LAUGH AT ME!
Yugi: -laughs at Zoe-
Zoe: I don't care about you laughing at me
Yugi: Darn…-stalks off to somewhere-
Zoe: -pushes the "If I push this button you fall down the hole right underneath you and pay a visit to Pegasus who is wearing nothing but Fuzzy Orange Thongs on his head" and the R.H.E. falls down to the Pikachu Realm AKA Peggy's house-
Peggy: Oo! A visitor! –walks towards the R.H.E. like a zombie-
R.H.E.: Stop chasing me you lazy-eyed psycho! –runs off backstage and Peggy follows him still zombie like-
Zoe: So, anyway, who was our next couple?
Yugi: -comes back from the place he stalked off to- Mai and Seto
Zoe: Ah, of course. So, send them in. NOW!
Chemo: -brings in a struggling Mai and a content Kaiba-
Mai: I WANT MY MOMMYYYY!! I MEAN, MY LAWYER!
Kaiba: Hey, it could be worse. Zoe could have paired you up with Tea.
Mai: -immediately shuts up- Point taken.
Zoe: OK, I don't hate *anyone* enough to pair them with Tea. –shudders- Maybe Tristan, but that's it…
Kaiba: Speakin' 'o Tristan, where is the old chap?
Zoe: OK, I'm going to pretend I didn't hear you talking like a British redneck, so I'll just say that Tristan was kicked to pluto somehow. He has a lot of company, though –thinks of all the people her Yami has kicked to pluto- We should have a memorial service for them!
Everyone: YEAH! A MEMORIAL SERVICE!
~~~
A/n: And that was chapter 5! I think…
Yugi: *starts singing* Another one bites the dust!
Narrator: So, will Mai ever agree to go willingly out with Kaiba? Will the Sailor Dairy Scouts—err, I mean Yu-Gi-Oh! Characters ever have a memorial service for the people kicked to Pluto? Will the whole plot of this story change?! Will—
Zoe: WE GET THE POINT! OFF WITH YOUR HEAD! –pushes the "If I push this button you fall down the hole right underneath you and pay a visit to Pegasus who is wearing nothing but Fuzzy Orange Thongs on his head" and the Narrator falls down into the Pikachu Realm AKA Peggy's house-