If you ever have a distant family get-together, you will know your parents would like you to be nice to these relatives even if they smell odd or tell bad jokes. Your parents will tell you it is a nice gesture.
Now as the Baudelaires stared at the man who had made the most recent events of their lives a pretty kettle of fish, they knew nothing could ever make them act nice. Now as you are reading this, you are most likely wearing an expression of puzzlement upon your face. When I say 'pretty kettle of fish', I mean the man had made the Baudelaire's recent lives a horrible experience. As I write this, the cavern I am hiding in is filling with gasoline, thanks to the same man. This man is Count Olaf.
The Baudelaires stared at the horrid Count Olaf, in his newest disguise. The Mayor stood up importantly and cleared his throat.
"Taylor and, erm, other children," he said, " This is Mr. Arthur Rutherford."
Arthur Rutherford looked at the children, with hunger for stealing fortunes in his eyes.
"Hello children," he said in a low voice, disguised his normally wheezy one.
Violet faked her best smile and looked at Mr. Rutherford,
"Hello sir. It's nice to meet you."
Klaus followed suit and spoke,
"Yes, it's a pleasure."
Finally, Sunny finished with "Shadgo!", which in this case meant 'We know who you really are but we'll pretend to believe you as who you want to be for now.'
Violet looked to Uncle Kennedy and spoke,
"If that's all, we'd like to get back to work."
Their guardian smiled nervously and stammered,
"Yes, of course."
The children exited the room and met by a water fountain. Klaus looked distraught,
"We were wrong. He did find us."
Violet continued with,
"He must have a new plan to capture us."
Sunny stated,
"He probably brought his assistants with him too."
Actually, Sunny said "Nadjah" but if she spoke in words you could understand, the above would have been the translation. Uncle Kennedy came out of the conference room, looking downhearted.
"The Mayor thinks I'm a lazy employee just because Rutherford is buttering his bread."
If someone says someone else is buttering yet another person's bread, it simply means they are being very nice to get on the third person's good side, which is also called 'sucking up'.
Violet looked at him, reassuringly.
"Don't worry, once the Mayor finds out who Rutherford really is, he'll think you are the better employee."
Kennedy looked puzzled,
"What do you mean?"
Klaus looked at the guardian and said,
"You see, the so-called 'Arthur Rutherford' is really Count Olaf!"
"What?" he questioned. "I thought Count Olaf had one eyebrow and I'm not going to ask Mr. Rutherford to lift his pants leg, so you can see if he has an eye tattoo."
Klaus replied angrily,
"His hat covers his eyebrow and he does have a tattoo because his is Count Olaf!"
"Klaus, calm down please." said their guardian. "I have to get back to work now and you should too."
With that statement, Uncle Kennedy left them to do whatever an assistant mayor does. The Baudelaires slumped against the wall and slid to the floor.
"If Uncle Kennedy doesn't believe us, I don't think anyone will." Violet said unhappily.
For a few minutes, the Baudelaires sat in silence, thinking about Olaf's newest scheme, whatever it was. Soon, they heard a squeaking noise, growing louder, they looked up to see a boy, looking to be around Violet's age, rolling a large, squeaky cart. He was pulling envelopes from this cart and dropping them on desks. As the boy wheeled the cart by the Baudelaires, he stopped and looked down at them.
The first thing the Baudelaires noticed about this boy was the certain thing on his shoulder. It was a small, yellow-green bird. This bird seemed to be well-trained because it did not move as the boy was moving down the hallway.
As he looked down at the children, the boy not the bird, he smiled a half-smile and questioned,
"Hello. Do you work here or are you visiting?"
"We work here. We're living with assistant mayor Taylor." said Violet, rising from the floor.
"I'm Violet Baudelaire and this is Klaus and that's Sunny."
He smiled a full smile now and said,
"I'm Peter Smolik. And this is my bird, Perico."
Klaus looked thoughtfully at Peter and said,
"Is that a foreign name?"
Peter answered,
"Well actually, I think Smolik might be partially Eastern but I'm not su-"
Klaus interrupted with,
"No, I actually meant your bird's name."
"Oh, it's Spanish. It means parakeet. Which is what my bird is."
Violet picked Sunny up in her arms and asked,
"So do you work here?"
Peter sighed and smiled his half-smile again.
"Yeah. I live with the Mayor. I'm an orphan."
Peter looked at the Baudelaire's downcast expressions. He questioned,
"What's wrong?"
The Baudelaires looked at each other, took a deep breath, and began to tell the miserable story of their lives, beginning with that fateful day when Mr. Poe had told them their parents had perished in a huge fire and ending with Olaf's most recent attempt to steal their fortunes and his re-kidnapping of the Quagmire triplets.
Now as the Baudelaires stared at the man who had made the most recent events of their lives a pretty kettle of fish, they knew nothing could ever make them act nice. Now as you are reading this, you are most likely wearing an expression of puzzlement upon your face. When I say 'pretty kettle of fish', I mean the man had made the Baudelaire's recent lives a horrible experience. As I write this, the cavern I am hiding in is filling with gasoline, thanks to the same man. This man is Count Olaf.
The Baudelaires stared at the horrid Count Olaf, in his newest disguise. The Mayor stood up importantly and cleared his throat.
"Taylor and, erm, other children," he said, " This is Mr. Arthur Rutherford."
Arthur Rutherford looked at the children, with hunger for stealing fortunes in his eyes.
"Hello children," he said in a low voice, disguised his normally wheezy one.
Violet faked her best smile and looked at Mr. Rutherford,
"Hello sir. It's nice to meet you."
Klaus followed suit and spoke,
"Yes, it's a pleasure."
Finally, Sunny finished with "Shadgo!", which in this case meant 'We know who you really are but we'll pretend to believe you as who you want to be for now.'
Violet looked to Uncle Kennedy and spoke,
"If that's all, we'd like to get back to work."
Their guardian smiled nervously and stammered,
"Yes, of course."
The children exited the room and met by a water fountain. Klaus looked distraught,
"We were wrong. He did find us."
Violet continued with,
"He must have a new plan to capture us."
Sunny stated,
"He probably brought his assistants with him too."
Actually, Sunny said "Nadjah" but if she spoke in words you could understand, the above would have been the translation. Uncle Kennedy came out of the conference room, looking downhearted.
"The Mayor thinks I'm a lazy employee just because Rutherford is buttering his bread."
If someone says someone else is buttering yet another person's bread, it simply means they are being very nice to get on the third person's good side, which is also called 'sucking up'.
Violet looked at him, reassuringly.
"Don't worry, once the Mayor finds out who Rutherford really is, he'll think you are the better employee."
Kennedy looked puzzled,
"What do you mean?"
Klaus looked at the guardian and said,
"You see, the so-called 'Arthur Rutherford' is really Count Olaf!"
"What?" he questioned. "I thought Count Olaf had one eyebrow and I'm not going to ask Mr. Rutherford to lift his pants leg, so you can see if he has an eye tattoo."
Klaus replied angrily,
"His hat covers his eyebrow and he does have a tattoo because his is Count Olaf!"
"Klaus, calm down please." said their guardian. "I have to get back to work now and you should too."
With that statement, Uncle Kennedy left them to do whatever an assistant mayor does. The Baudelaires slumped against the wall and slid to the floor.
"If Uncle Kennedy doesn't believe us, I don't think anyone will." Violet said unhappily.
For a few minutes, the Baudelaires sat in silence, thinking about Olaf's newest scheme, whatever it was. Soon, they heard a squeaking noise, growing louder, they looked up to see a boy, looking to be around Violet's age, rolling a large, squeaky cart. He was pulling envelopes from this cart and dropping them on desks. As the boy wheeled the cart by the Baudelaires, he stopped and looked down at them.
The first thing the Baudelaires noticed about this boy was the certain thing on his shoulder. It was a small, yellow-green bird. This bird seemed to be well-trained because it did not move as the boy was moving down the hallway.
As he looked down at the children, the boy not the bird, he smiled a half-smile and questioned,
"Hello. Do you work here or are you visiting?"
"We work here. We're living with assistant mayor Taylor." said Violet, rising from the floor.
"I'm Violet Baudelaire and this is Klaus and that's Sunny."
He smiled a full smile now and said,
"I'm Peter Smolik. And this is my bird, Perico."
Klaus looked thoughtfully at Peter and said,
"Is that a foreign name?"
Peter answered,
"Well actually, I think Smolik might be partially Eastern but I'm not su-"
Klaus interrupted with,
"No, I actually meant your bird's name."
"Oh, it's Spanish. It means parakeet. Which is what my bird is."
Violet picked Sunny up in her arms and asked,
"So do you work here?"
Peter sighed and smiled his half-smile again.
"Yeah. I live with the Mayor. I'm an orphan."
Peter looked at the Baudelaire's downcast expressions. He questioned,
"What's wrong?"
The Baudelaires looked at each other, took a deep breath, and began to tell the miserable story of their lives, beginning with that fateful day when Mr. Poe had told them their parents had perished in a huge fire and ending with Olaf's most recent attempt to steal their fortunes and his re-kidnapping of the Quagmire triplets.