Listening to the Radio
Chapter 1: Cloud
Summary: a stupid story. Flame away.
Disclaimer: Most certainly do not own anything, a'ight? Just my twisted horribly pink brain.
Notes: May sound weird. Not used to making humor fics in prose. Used to script style.
One day, the cast of FF7 (Sephiroth included) excluding Aeris who was dead, decided to go Road Trippin' for some odd reason. The odd reason would be to visit Aeris' underwater grave. (sniff..)
"Road Trippin' with mah two favorite allies.." sang Cloud as he drove.
"Shaddup, &*#$@$ cheese addict." said Cid Highwind, as all of you may have guessed.
"Hey, I was just singing along with the song!" he protested.
"Yeah, but you oughta sing at the right ^%$#@ key, ya ^%#@."
The others (Tifa, Barret, Red XIII, Vincent, Yuffie, Cait Sith, Sephiroth) who are cramped at the back, groaned inwardly. This argument could go on for hours.
"Hmph. At least I'm not the one FARTING every now and then in this cramped vehicle."
"Watch yer mouth, ya @#$!...."
"Hey, I've an idea! Why don't I drive? Then, you could argue at the back, and not put us all in danger of a possible car crash!!!!" said Tifa. also gives me a good chance to crash this car, just in case.
"No way, if I have to be IN this road trip, I have to drive! Don't know why I'm in this in the first place, might as well CONTROL YOUR BLOODY FATE!" said Sephiroth.
Red XIII meowed, or barked, or whatever, "Geez, I dunno. You're a villain, after all."
"Yeah, what he said!" meowed Cait.
"Exactly. I have a little friend here called the Masamune who would do the talking if I don't get my way."
Yuffie hopped up. "Wow, it talks? Can I see?" The others sighed.
Sephiroth rolled his eyes. "Great. Road tripping with lunatics. Mother should have let me use the Giant Lawn Mower summon.."
"Hey, you're bluffing! It doesn't even have a mouth!"
"Ya &^%#^^. Thash it, I'll drive!" With that, Cid violently threw Cloud at the back seats and grabbed the steering wheel. "Now shut your ^^$#^%^##$(&(*& potty mouths and be quiet!"
Cloud landed ungracefully upon the snoring Barret. (Barret: OOF!) "Hmph. I get no respect around here." He then found a seat by the window, and stared at the sights. The others quieted down, by some miracle.
(two hours later.)
"Are we there yet?"
"No."
"Are we there yet?"
"No!"
"Are we there yet?"
"No!!!"
"Are we there yet?"
"NO!!!!"
"Are we there yet?" said Yuffie, one moh time!
"NO, ya %#%#$#@%#^&(*&($#@(*&#(*&&#(*&%&@&(*#%&&%(*&#@!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Cid H.
"Hmph. GROUCH!" Yuffie pouted. "It's so boring in here!!!!!"
"And you're not making it any better." muttered Vincent.
"Hey, did you say something?" Yuffie asked.
"Oh, nothing." "... can't we play some CDs? It's too *quiet* in here." said Tifa.
"Ah, fine. just as long as it's not some &^$@#$ A Walk to Remember ^%$%^."
"TOO Late!!!!" said Tifa, as she inserted A Walk To Remember sound track.
"#@#$^$%!@$#%$%!!!!!!" said Cid as the stereo started humming Mandy Moore.
By that time, Cloud felt himself getting drowsier. and drowsier..
Cloud found himself in an auditorium. with a brown haired-woman sitting on the stage. He blinked like an idiot for some seconds. then widened his eyes when he realized that he was on the stage, too.
"eep. what the hell am I doing here?!" he thought.
Suddenly, everyone got silent. Then, a piano started playing. Cloud saw that Barret suddenly knew how to play the piano. He made a face.
He looked at the brown haired girl. He noticed the elegant red dress, and recognized it.
". AERIS?!" he screamed. But for some odd reason, his voice was muted.
Aeris began singing.
"There's a song that's inside of my soul. It's the one that I tried to write over and over again."
Cloud made a dumbfounded face at her. The audience shot him weird looks. ".she sounds just like Mandy Moore!" he thought.
Then, a little Cait Sith fairy appeared outta nowhere. "Of course, dontcha know that she did the voice of Aeris in Kingdom Hearts?"
". wha?"
"Oh. Whoopsie doodle!" then, the little Cait Sith fairy disappeared again.
Cloud blinked. Then, he listened to Aeris again.
"I'm awake in the infinite cold. But you sing to me over and over and over again."
By that time, Aeris looked at Cloud and smiled. When the chorus began, she looked at the audience again. "So I lay my head back down. And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours, I pray, To be only yours, I know now, You're my only hope."
Cloud said, "duuuuhh.." like an idiot. Then, he noticed Barret was REALLY good at the piano.
". I must be dreaming." he thought.
The little Cait Sith fairy appeared again. "Yah, sure yer dreamin'! Why'd you think I'm a fairy, eh?"
". wha?"
"Okay, I'm gone!" Fairy poofed to nowhere again.
"Sing to me the song of the stars. Of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again."
Magical stars suddenly appeared. The audience was impressed. Cloud needed to go to the bathroom.
"When it feels like my dreams are so far. Sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again."
Aeris sat beside Cloud. He gasped. He felt like he just reached puberty.
"So I lay my head back down. And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours I pray To be only yours I know now You're my only hope."
Aeris held Cloud's hands. (aawww.) Then, a Seifer fairy appeared with the Cait Sith fairy.
"Puberty boy! Stop blushing! HAHAHA!!!!" said the Seifer fairy.
"Don't mind him kid! Yer beautiful!" said Cait Sith. Then they disappeared again with a poof!
".. wha?"
Aeris continued. "I give you my destiny. I'm givin' you all of me. I want your symphony Singing with all that I am."
Cloud was really, really wondering HOW Barret could play the piano like that.
"Like I told ya kid, you was dreamin!"
Cloud had a good mind to get a fairy extinguisher.
"At the top of my lungs! I'm giving it back."
Aeris walked to the center of the stage, then kneeled in fronta the people. kinda like her last moments alive. Cloud blinked like an idiot. kinda like in her last moments alive.
"So I lay my head back down And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours, I pray To be only yours, I know now, You're my only hope..."
"Hmm.... ooh."
Cloud finally approached Aeris. Before they could reach each other in some dramatic moment, a shiny, leather-clad flying thing with a long katana (guess who? :D) jumped and stabbed Aeris.
Dun dun dun!
The audience gasped. Barret gagged in surprise. Cait Sith and Seifer went bean-eyed. Cloud's world went spinning.
"duh. (ehem.) NOOOOOOO!!!!!!"
Sephiroth smiled wickedly. He slid Aeris off in the most dramatic and neat way possible. Then, he started poking Cloud with it.
"Yo, Cloud! Cloud! Cloud! Cloud!....."
"Cloud! Cloud! CLOUD, WAKE UP YA %$#%#%^$%!!!!!!!!!!"
". wha?" said Cloud.
He woke up, and realized he was drooling all over the window.
"If yer interested, git off the car and piss! This is our only pit stop! Unless I get decaffeinated again." said Cid as he slurped his Nestea. "ah. tea!!!"
Cloud got off the van and walked towards the gas station's bathroom. "Man, that dream seemed so real." he then looked at Barret and Cait Sith, who are bickering by the Soda machine and unbeknownst to them, Yuffie, who is stealing their material and change. ". On second thought."
a/n: Okay, if you liked my pathetic attempt to turn a serious event into a humorous one, review and I'll continue!
Chapter 1: Cloud
Summary: a stupid story. Flame away.
Disclaimer: Most certainly do not own anything, a'ight? Just my twisted horribly pink brain.
Notes: May sound weird. Not used to making humor fics in prose. Used to script style.
One day, the cast of FF7 (Sephiroth included) excluding Aeris who was dead, decided to go Road Trippin' for some odd reason. The odd reason would be to visit Aeris' underwater grave. (sniff..)
"Road Trippin' with mah two favorite allies.." sang Cloud as he drove.
"Shaddup, &*#$@$ cheese addict." said Cid Highwind, as all of you may have guessed.
"Hey, I was just singing along with the song!" he protested.
"Yeah, but you oughta sing at the right ^%$#@ key, ya ^%#@."
The others (Tifa, Barret, Red XIII, Vincent, Yuffie, Cait Sith, Sephiroth) who are cramped at the back, groaned inwardly. This argument could go on for hours.
"Hmph. At least I'm not the one FARTING every now and then in this cramped vehicle."
"Watch yer mouth, ya @#$!...."
"Hey, I've an idea! Why don't I drive? Then, you could argue at the back, and not put us all in danger of a possible car crash!!!!" said Tifa. also gives me a good chance to crash this car, just in case.
"No way, if I have to be IN this road trip, I have to drive! Don't know why I'm in this in the first place, might as well CONTROL YOUR BLOODY FATE!" said Sephiroth.
Red XIII meowed, or barked, or whatever, "Geez, I dunno. You're a villain, after all."
"Yeah, what he said!" meowed Cait.
"Exactly. I have a little friend here called the Masamune who would do the talking if I don't get my way."
Yuffie hopped up. "Wow, it talks? Can I see?" The others sighed.
Sephiroth rolled his eyes. "Great. Road tripping with lunatics. Mother should have let me use the Giant Lawn Mower summon.."
"Hey, you're bluffing! It doesn't even have a mouth!"
"Ya &^%#^^. Thash it, I'll drive!" With that, Cid violently threw Cloud at the back seats and grabbed the steering wheel. "Now shut your ^^$#^%^##$(&(*& potty mouths and be quiet!"
Cloud landed ungracefully upon the snoring Barret. (Barret: OOF!) "Hmph. I get no respect around here." He then found a seat by the window, and stared at the sights. The others quieted down, by some miracle.
(two hours later.)
"Are we there yet?"
"No."
"Are we there yet?"
"No!"
"Are we there yet?"
"No!!!"
"Are we there yet?"
"NO!!!!"
"Are we there yet?" said Yuffie, one moh time!
"NO, ya %#%#$#@%#^&(*&($#@(*&#(*&&#(*&%&@&(*#%&&%(*&#@!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Cid H.
"Hmph. GROUCH!" Yuffie pouted. "It's so boring in here!!!!!"
"And you're not making it any better." muttered Vincent.
"Hey, did you say something?" Yuffie asked.
"Oh, nothing." "... can't we play some CDs? It's too *quiet* in here." said Tifa.
"Ah, fine. just as long as it's not some &^$@#$ A Walk to Remember ^%$%^."
"TOO Late!!!!" said Tifa, as she inserted A Walk To Remember sound track.
"#@#$^$%!@$#%$%!!!!!!" said Cid as the stereo started humming Mandy Moore.
By that time, Cloud felt himself getting drowsier. and drowsier..
Cloud found himself in an auditorium. with a brown haired-woman sitting on the stage. He blinked like an idiot for some seconds. then widened his eyes when he realized that he was on the stage, too.
"eep. what the hell am I doing here?!" he thought.
Suddenly, everyone got silent. Then, a piano started playing. Cloud saw that Barret suddenly knew how to play the piano. He made a face.
He looked at the brown haired girl. He noticed the elegant red dress, and recognized it.
". AERIS?!" he screamed. But for some odd reason, his voice was muted.
Aeris began singing.
"There's a song that's inside of my soul. It's the one that I tried to write over and over again."
Cloud made a dumbfounded face at her. The audience shot him weird looks. ".she sounds just like Mandy Moore!" he thought.
Then, a little Cait Sith fairy appeared outta nowhere. "Of course, dontcha know that she did the voice of Aeris in Kingdom Hearts?"
". wha?"
"Oh. Whoopsie doodle!" then, the little Cait Sith fairy disappeared again.
Cloud blinked. Then, he listened to Aeris again.
"I'm awake in the infinite cold. But you sing to me over and over and over again."
By that time, Aeris looked at Cloud and smiled. When the chorus began, she looked at the audience again. "So I lay my head back down. And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours, I pray, To be only yours, I know now, You're my only hope."
Cloud said, "duuuuhh.." like an idiot. Then, he noticed Barret was REALLY good at the piano.
". I must be dreaming." he thought.
The little Cait Sith fairy appeared again. "Yah, sure yer dreamin'! Why'd you think I'm a fairy, eh?"
". wha?"
"Okay, I'm gone!" Fairy poofed to nowhere again.
"Sing to me the song of the stars. Of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again."
Magical stars suddenly appeared. The audience was impressed. Cloud needed to go to the bathroom.
"When it feels like my dreams are so far. Sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again."
Aeris sat beside Cloud. He gasped. He felt like he just reached puberty.
"So I lay my head back down. And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours I pray To be only yours I know now You're my only hope."
Aeris held Cloud's hands. (aawww.) Then, a Seifer fairy appeared with the Cait Sith fairy.
"Puberty boy! Stop blushing! HAHAHA!!!!" said the Seifer fairy.
"Don't mind him kid! Yer beautiful!" said Cait Sith. Then they disappeared again with a poof!
".. wha?"
Aeris continued. "I give you my destiny. I'm givin' you all of me. I want your symphony Singing with all that I am."
Cloud was really, really wondering HOW Barret could play the piano like that.
"Like I told ya kid, you was dreamin!"
Cloud had a good mind to get a fairy extinguisher.
"At the top of my lungs! I'm giving it back."
Aeris walked to the center of the stage, then kneeled in fronta the people. kinda like her last moments alive. Cloud blinked like an idiot. kinda like in her last moments alive.
"So I lay my head back down And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours, I pray To be only yours, I know now, You're my only hope..."
"Hmm.... ooh."
Cloud finally approached Aeris. Before they could reach each other in some dramatic moment, a shiny, leather-clad flying thing with a long katana (guess who? :D) jumped and stabbed Aeris.
Dun dun dun!
The audience gasped. Barret gagged in surprise. Cait Sith and Seifer went bean-eyed. Cloud's world went spinning.
"duh. (ehem.) NOOOOOOO!!!!!!"
Sephiroth smiled wickedly. He slid Aeris off in the most dramatic and neat way possible. Then, he started poking Cloud with it.
"Yo, Cloud! Cloud! Cloud! Cloud!....."
"Cloud! Cloud! CLOUD, WAKE UP YA %$#%#%^$%!!!!!!!!!!"
". wha?" said Cloud.
He woke up, and realized he was drooling all over the window.
"If yer interested, git off the car and piss! This is our only pit stop! Unless I get decaffeinated again." said Cid as he slurped his Nestea. "ah. tea!!!"
Cloud got off the van and walked towards the gas station's bathroom. "Man, that dream seemed so real." he then looked at Barret and Cait Sith, who are bickering by the Soda machine and unbeknownst to them, Yuffie, who is stealing their material and change. ". On second thought."
a/n: Okay, if you liked my pathetic attempt to turn a serious event into a humorous one, review and I'll continue!