Chapter 24: Repercussions and Reprimands

It was kind of hard to tell when night had finally fallen upon them. Sam had put the clock somewhere and Jack could only guess where it was, and when he suggested that they look for it she had shot him a dirty look and had attempted to drink more of the champagne.

That's when she started throwing up.

Night had truly fallen for Jack when Sam fell asleep against the table, her hand still stuck in the almost-empty bowl of jelly, thus signalling bedtime.

"Come on, Sam, it's much more comfortable if you sleep on a bed," Jack said, adjusting the towel around her, and she looked up at him blearily.

"I don't feel so good, Sir."

"I know, Sam, just try to sleep it off." He helped her up and lead her to the bed, taking in the room as they walked over there. Cringing, Jack sighed.

Wrappers-candy wrappers, chocolate wrappers, chip packets and spice packets-everywhere. Foodstuff littered the ground, along with that empty champagne bottle and plates and other assorted accessories. Even the original cart that had been delivered had somehow managed to tip over and was now lying on the ground, almost completely forgotten. Jack considered cleaning it all up for a split-second, before remembering that he was still handcuffed to a very unhappy, sick and sleepy Sam… and like he could be bothered, anyway.

"How are we going to sleep, Sir?" Sam asked quietly, her voice weak and tired. She felt like crap, and probably looked it too, in her opinion.

"The beds are single, and our handcuffs don't allow us to be even one foot apart."

"So we improvise, Carter," Jack said, pulling her around to his bed and bending over.

"If we need a double bed, then we create a double bed. Now come help me push."

"Good thinking, Sir," Sam stated as she and Jack pushed his bed against hers.

"See, now we have a double bed," he said happily, straightening up, before turning to her.

"After you, madam." She curtseyed slightly, playing along.

"Why thank you, good Sir." She slipped under the covers and he quickly followed, before he turned off one of the lamps and they were engulfed in complete darkness.

"Sir… there's something on my face…" Sam whispered after awhile. There was a pause.

"That's me, Carter. Sorry."

~~~

"Carter, that is the third time you've kicked me!"

"Sorry, Sir, but you've kicked me five times, so I wouldn't exactly be complaining if I were you…"

"Well, sorry about that Carter."

"This isn't working!"

"Obviously not, otherwise I don't think we'd be awake!" There was a long silence afterwards as the two both sighed, and Sam slowly turned to him.

"Sir…"

"Do you need to throw up again?"

"No… I just remembered something." Jack glanced at her (or where he thought she was. Like her, he couldn't exactly see through pitch-black darkness).

"What?"

"I can pick locks." There was a pause.

"How the hell does that possible relate to us and what we're talking…" Sam held up their handcuffed hands and Jack suddenly realized the extent of her words.

"I can pick locks, Sir."

"You can pick locks."

"I can pick locks." There was a pause.

"Why the hell didn't you say that before?"

"I just remembered!"

"You just remembered?! What the hell?!"

"Like you don't get that sometimes!"

"Carter… do you realize… do you… do you realize?!…"

"I know!" she wailed. "We could have spent this whole day normally! We wouldn't have been stuck to each other! I could be wearing a shirt right now!"

"Unlock them now. The damage might be done, but we can still have a peaceful night. What do you need?"

"Just give me a hair clip or a paper clip or something like that."

"Hair clip. Your department."

"Where's my damned suitcase?" Sam leant over the side of the bed and searched for her trunk, before rummaging through it, trying to find what she was looking for.

"Got it yet, Carter?"

"Could you turn on a light?" Jack leant over and pressed the lamp on, and there was another brief pause.

"Still looking… got it!" She pulled out the silver clip triumphantly and turned back to Jack, before quickly grabbing hold of his hand and slipping the end of the clip into the keyhole. There was a pause as Sam struggled with it for a while and Jack watched on apprehensively, before they both heard a click and the handcuff became undone. Jack pulled away to find that they were finally separated from each other, and they both grinned at each other before Jack gave a huge 'woo-hoo' and threw his arms around her, hugging her tightly, both oblivious to the fact that the towel had completely fallen off.

"We're free!" he shouted, shaking her slightly.

"You seem a little too happy to be getting away from me, flyboy," Sam stated, grinning, and Jack shook his head, grinning right back.

"Sam, if I could be stuck with anyone, I assure you it would be you," he said, and she shook her own head.

"But Sam… you've freed us! You've freed us! You're an angel!"

And he meant it when he said that.

Sam just continued on grinning, undoing the handcuff from around her own wrist, before slipping it off and chucking it onto the bedside table.

"Well, Sir, although I don't mind the praise, I am tired and sick and want to get some sleep, and if it's alright with you I think we should continue this tomorrow morning."

"Okay, Carter. Thanks," he said, still grinning.

"Your welcome, Sir," she replied, before switching off the lamp and snuggling into bed.

"See, now this is nice, Carter."

"Careful where you put that hand, Sir."

"Oh, sorry. Still getting used to it."

~~~

"I don't think you're allowed to have animals on base," Daniel said pointedly as he and Teal'c walked up to the compound together, although he was amused nonetheless. It wasn't often you saw Teal'c cradling a pig in one of his hands, eating cotton candy using the other and balloons tied around both wrists. Teal'c tilted his head at Daniel.

"Are you sure of this fact?"

"Well… no, but…"

"Then speak no further."

"Fine…" Upon reaching security guards, they merely glanced at the pig, before letting them through.

"What did I tell you, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked. There was a silence, before Teal'c looked at him.

"Daniel Jackson?"

"Oh, sorry. The last thing I remember you telling me was to speak no further. I guess I took it a little too literally."

"I get the intense feeling that you are annoyed with me, Daniel Jackson."

"With you? Never."

~~~

"Oh my God!" The figure at the door stared down at Jack and Sam's now stirring figures with wide, shocked eyes and watched as they awoke, struggling to comprehend what was going on.

"What? What's going on?" Sam asked, rubbing at her eyes, and pausing for a moment to realize that she was sprawled across Jack in a rather unflattering manner. She was about to pull away, only to realize that his arms were entangled around her and she didn't know where he began and where she ended.

"Who dares to awake us from our slumber?" Jack mumbled thickly, blinking a few times and trying to recognize the person in the doorway. He swore quietly when he did-Simon.

"What brings you to this part of town?" he asked sarcastically, trying to sit up, before realizing he and Sam were oddly jumbled together. Pulling away from each other, Jack also realized that Sam wasn't wearing a top, and that they were uncuffed from each other. He also smelt Sam's breath and cringed slightly. This couldn't look good.

~~~

A/N: This was way too much fun to write.