A/N: This is Part Twenty of the CLOSURE series. This is a sequel of the ENOUGH series, so please read that one first or this won't make any sense.

Any of you expected Drusilla to pop in?

Let me know.

Disclaimer: You should know that this belongs to Joss Whedon and the parties involved in getting the show on the air.

Feedback: As you wish.

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Heart to Heart

"Yes. You're back. No more metal and lightning in your mind." Drusilla said, staring into Spike's golden eyes.

"No more, pet. No more." He said. Golden eyes staring at golden eyes.

However, sadness soon washed over Drusilla's eyes.

"And yet, there lies the golden halo over your spirit." She said.

"What?"

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"Ok. Once again. We are going to do what to look for whom who is with what?" Jean asked.

"We're going to find Spike who is with Drusilla." Buffy answered.

"Uhm, I don't know if you remember, but isn't Spike the vampire who almost ripped off a bit of your neck?" Jean asked, as Buffy practically ran in her room, packing some changes of clothing.

"Yes, I'm aware." Buffy answered.

"So there," Jean insisted, "are you crazy?"

"Tell me something, Jean." Buffy said, without looking at Jean, "When we met, what were you doing?"

"Mostly? Crying." The brunette said.

"Besides that."

"Trying to avenge my brother."

"Yes. And when we tried to stop you, what happened?"

"We fought."

"Precisely. Did I manage to convince you otherwise?"

"No."

"What did we do?"

"We hunted the vampires who killed my brother."

"Yeees. Where?"

"Canada."

"That's another country, isn't it?"

"Ok, ok, I get your point. Now please try to get mine."

Buffy now stopped packing and turned around to see Jean, who was still leaning on the doorframe of Buffy's room.

"What's the problem?" Buffy asked.

"Uhm, well, I don't want you to think this is a Hallmark moment or something like that, but, you're like family to me." Jean said, looking everywhere but into Buffy's eyes, "And I don't want anything to happen to you. I've noticed that with this particular vampire, you're never on your top game."

Buffy smiled and walked towards Jean.

"Look, I know that whenever Spike is thrown into our lives, chaos arrives, but I can't leave things the way they are. I owe it to him."

"You owe it to him?"

"Yes. He stood by my side no matter what. I repaid him with my hate and my disgust towards him."

"He hasn't been Mr. Goody Two Shoes lately."

"I'm aware, but he made some interesting points lately."

"Care to share?"

"You heard what he said. I held him responsible for things he did years ago. I condemned him for his nature. He helped us and tried to change because he loved me. At first it might have been his chip but then he became one of us. A Scooby. He fought with us and he withstood a lot of things for us. Being realistic, my friends have pulled more idiotic stunts than he did those years with us."

"Hence all the things he told everyone when he came."

"Yeah. It was a cheap shot, but he had a point."

"That convinced you?"

"There were many things that convinced me of his love and his potential for good. I hope I can bring him back."

"You sure?"

"Of course."

"Then I'll help."

"Thanks."

Jean turned around and began walking away when Buffy held her arm.

"I know that you still have your parents, even with them living in Pittsburgh and all that. You still chose to stay here and help me. You let me train you and you have been more than a friend here. So let me tell you that you are also family to me. I love you."

A huge grin appeared on Jean's face.

"Yeah, I love you too. Big sis."

"Don't push it."

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"A golden what?"

"A halo. Over you. Covering you. Morphing you."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know what I talk about."

Spike ran his fingers through his hair. He really didn't miss her insane ramblings.

"I don't understand you, luv."

"Yes, I think you do." Drusilla's eyes shifted back to their human color, and she ran her fingers through Spike's face.

"You wear a different face. Even your spirit is different. The only thing that remains is your name."

"You're speaking nonsense, Dru. It's me. I only have a beard and don't bleach my hair any longer."

"No. You're covered in it."

Spike growled. Could he not rid himself of the slayer's influence?

"I'm not covered in her anymore! Not again! Not ever!" He shouted. Drusilla's eyes softened and stared at him.

"I'm not talking about the slayer, William." She softly said. Spike was shocked because of the sudden clarity that took over Drusilla's usual crazy self.

"What?" He asked.

"You managed to free yourself of her. But there is a different miasma covering you."

"I don't understand." Spike said. He suddenly felt tired. Very tired.

"Listen to yourself, William. Look inside you. Hear yourself. What do you notice?"

"Nothing, pet."

"You lie, William. You know it."

"Stop with the riddles then, Dru, since you clearly know what troubles me."

"You still love her."

Spike's eyes flared even more and his fangs descended.

"I don't love her!"

"Yes. You do. You know it."

"You clearly said it. She no longer covers me."

"That means that you're not obsessed about her. Your love is something entirely different."

"What?"

Drusilla circled him, and motioned for him to turn around. The open door to the crypt allowed some rays of sunlight to pour into the crypt.

"Look." She said, and extended her hand until one tiny ray of light touched her. Since the ray was small, her hand didn't ignite immediately, but a tiny tendril of smoke rose.

"The sun burns me, William. I'm covered with darkness and in there I belong. Now look."

She took his hand and placed it in the sunlight. The hand remained as it were, not igniting.

"Aw, Dru, that's because of the ring." He said. Drusilla smiled and shook her head.

"You miss the symbolism of it, William." She said as she released his arm.

"Symbolism?"

"It means that you no longer belong here in the darkness, with me." She said, a single tear escaping her eyes.

"What?" He almost whispered.

"The golden glow tells me that you no longer walk in the shadows, William. You have light inside of you now."

"How can I have light inside of me?"

"You know how."

"Because…?"

"Yes, William. You still love her. That feeling made you want to improve yourself. Do things that were not prone to your nature."

"How can that be? I'm a bloody vampire, remember?"

"There's a difference between what you are and what you do, William."

"There is none, Dru. I'm a vampire. A monster."

"That's what you think I am?"

"Honestly?"

A grin spread on both their faces. Spike's eyes turned back blue and his fangs receded.

"We are vampires, Spike. We are monsters, indeed. But that doesn't rule our lives. It seems you made a choice that most of us can't. You've chosen to live amongst humans. Something most of us won't do."

"You could, you know? It really isn't that hard."

"Living amongst the cattle? Hearing all those little voices whispering and their minds whirling around?"

"Don't slip back into madness, Dru. It's been the best conversation I've ever had with you."

Dru's eyes stared deep into his own. They had shared a connection. Not a deep one, because it had been torn on several occasions, but they had been together for so long. They knew each other.

"It's time for you to leave, Spike. Or did you come to kill me?"

"No. Just…. stay out of America, Dru. Go back home. Don't get yourself killed."

"I guess you'll go back to her side?"

"I belong there. I left 'er before. I won't do it again."

"My sweet Spike. If you could see your colors."

Spike knew then that their time was over. He had been fortunate enough to share some moments with the sane Drusilla, not the shadow that was his sire.

"Yes, Dru. If I could see them."

"They shine in the night, whispering to the stars that a new Spike arises, next to his golden queen."

Spike smiled weakly and kissed Drusilla on her forehead. He hugged her and he inhaled her scent one last time. He knew he'd see her again in the future, but on this age, their time had ended.

"Take care, Dru. We'll meet again."

"Ride safe, my knight. Ride safe."

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"Where do you think you're going?"

"To find Spike, Giles. Jean has agreed to come with me. We'll bring him home."

"No."

"I've made my mind. Sorry."

Giles shook his head and grabbed Buffy's arm.

"I said no, Buffy."

"I don't want to argue with you, Giles."

Giles sighed and wished that he'd gone to England when he had the chance.

"Listen to me, Buffy. Please."

Buffy huffed a bit but relaxed.

"Ok. Spill."

"Don't go after him. Leave him alone."

"What?"

"You heard me. Stop this, Buffy. Respect his choices this time."

Buffy could not believe what she heard.

"This is not up for discussion." She said, as she picked up her bag and walked outside.

It was a beautiful day in Sunnydale, and Buffy was confident that she could find Spike with Jean's help. Besides, Angel had offered his help in finding him. She was certain that she'd find Spike in a few days.

"Buffy." Giles said, standing on the porch steps. Buffy ignored him and began placing her bags on the trunk of her car. Giles walked down the steps until he stood right behind Buffy.

"Buffy, please. Listen to me."

Buffy spun around, and Giles noticed her red and swollen eyes.

"I won't let this one go, Giles. Even if I have to chase him to the end of the world."

Giles shook his head.

"No, Buffy. You have to let him go. He left three years ago to seek something else besides the pain and hate he found here. He left because there was nothing for him here."

"Look, Giles. I'm tired of crying and feeling lousy because of all the things I said to him. I have to make amends. I have to find him."

Giles placed his hands on Buffy's shoulders and smiled softly at her.

"I'm sorry, Buffy, but there's nothing else you can do. You sought him once and look at how it turned out." He looked briefly at the bandage around Buffy's neck. She placed her hand on top of it.

"Please, try to understand." She whispered.

"It's you who must understand, Buffy. He's gone. Deal with it. Respect his decision. You have never given any thought about the things that Spike feels or what he wants. He's out of our lives now. We've all let him go. It's time you do it as well."

"What…?"

"Let him go, Buffy."

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Wandering in the streets of Quilmes, Spike felt a certain calmness that had eluded his life for the past four or five years. He had finally ended some loose ends on his life, namely Angelus and Drusilla. Being able to stand over his pompous grandsire and finally fixing things with Drusilla gave him comfort.

Cold comfort, that is.

He didn't want to humiliate his grandsire; after all, it had been Angelus who had taught him everything that was needed in order to survive as a vampire.

Forgiving Drusilla for dumping him, well, he didn't love her anymore. Only a slight reminder of care lingered inside Spike's heart, but not the endless devotion that had lived there for over a century.

So, what was eating him inside?

He knew it. How had Drusilla referred to her?

The golden queen.

That was what troubled him so deeply.

The bane of his existence.

The love of his life.

He had to fix that.

End of Chapter.