Disclaimer: They are not mine out here, but in my head... the plot is mine, please don't take it.

A/N: To my shock and dismay, caffinated is not a word, but I'm using it anyway. Apologies to anyone who finds that exceptionally annoying, and even to the people who it irritates only a little. I was anything but well caffinated when I wrote this, so- I think I need to go to sleep. Instead, I'm writing. I'm not a very smart person.

Ron sighed. He'd just about used up all of his hard earned credits, and hadn't gotten even a sip of the elusive Pepsi. It seemed that all of the luck was against him; no one else was having such troubles! Harry and Ginny continued to drink gallons of the caffinated liquid, and he couldn't get an ounce.

It had started with the disaster with Snape. Then he had seen Ginny and Harry kissing, and hadn't been able to do anything for some time. There had been the time that Dumbledore had come through the lounge singing 'I am a Gypsy Queen' and wearing a skirt just as he was about to drink- well, there weren't many people who hadn't dropped everything at that sight.

The world is out to get me. I just know it. Oh, well, I guess it isn't that important, but still... Ron very, very carefully tip-toed over to the Pepsi machine. He surveyed everything around him for possible threats- his sister and Harry, Hermione, Dumbledore, Snape, Neville, (just because Neville always screws things up) and Professor Trelawney. No one was to be seen; in fact, the lounge was almost entirely empty.

The lack of a visible threat did not put Ron off his guard, though. He magicked a pair of ear-muffs so no noise would get through, and put any number of balance charms on himself. If you're going to do something right, do it obsessively-compulsively right!

He held up his wand, and a chip was transferred.

"Your wand account is now - zero credits - please choose your drink," a mechanical voice droned.

Dumbledore does go all out for accuracy. Of course, he didn't know that this was accurate from his own experiences, but, according to Hermione, the recorded messages were getting pretty common- not so much on pop machines, but in other areas of muggle life. Ron contemplated this for a moment, then got back to the task at hand.

He reached out slowly and carefully, pausing to eye the room once more. The pads of his index and middle fingers rested gently on the Pepsi logo- and pushed.

So far, so good, he thought as the can clinked into the receptacle at the bottom.

After a last look around, he reached down and picked up the can of syrupy liquid. It was cold and refreshing, even just lying in his hands. It took a bit of effort to work his finger under the tab so that he could pop the opening, but no magic was going to mar this.

The can, which had most assuredly not been shaken, popped open very satisfyingly. Bubbles spritzed to the top and tickled Ron's nose as he leaned over.

"Ron! Ron! You've got to see this! You'll never in a quadrillion years guess what we-" Dean's enthusiastic exclamation was cut off as Ron looked at him, horrified.

"Get away! Get away! I don't want to see! Take it away!" He skittered backwards, Pepsi can held tightly against his chest, shying away from their attempts to show him- something.

Seamus was faster, however, and thrust a picture under his nose. "You have to look!"

Ron couldn't help but look down. "Sir Cadogan? Why do I have to look at-" Yet another Pepsi can was discarded as Ron fell to the floor.

* * * * *

Dumbledore stood in front of the painting, eyes twinkling away. "You do have to show me, if only so that I can believe it."

A flush spread across the knight's neck, and he hung his head.

"I assume that one of the more artistically able students did the honors?"

"Seventeen years ago- I was younger then. Had no idea that it would stay on me..."

"And now the paintings are pooling their winnings to have a touch-up artist come in?"

His head fell even lower. "Yes."

Dumbledore just smiled. "I've nothing against it. I'm just surprised that you want to get rid of so useful a weapon- the pure shock has made every witness to it faint. I don't care what you have done, so long as you show me the notorious picture."

Sir Cadogan looked at Dumbledore suspiciously. "Are you sure that you want to see?"

The Headmaster nodded an enthusiastic affirmative, at which the knight sighed. "If you're sure..."

He pulled the sleeve up.

Dumbledore had trained himself over the years to not be shocked by anything, and not even the Weasley twins' antics had tested him very much. This, however...

It was the very essence of a younger Snape, with a few minor changes. The hair, for one- brilliant pink, but otherwise perfectly rendered. The eyes- flecks of a demonic red danced about. Suddenly the magically moving image opened its eyes even wider, staring at Dumbledore- and it stuck its bright pink tongue out.

Ka-thunk.

"I knew it..." Sir Cadogan mumbled, looking down at the fallen man. "I knew it."

A/N: I've got a couple of things, other than my interminable rambling, but please read them.

This was a pretty short chapter; apologies, but I wanted to post something. I'll get more up probably by this Sunday, depending on how much sleep I get this Saturday...

At the top of this chapter I mentioned Dumbledore dancing through the halls singing. My band director did this at the end of the year, and it was quite possibly the funniest thing that I have ever seen. Just wanted to give credit where credit's due.

You now know what Sir Cadogan's tattoo is; I hope that all of you are happy... I have to admit, it seemed like the anticipation was funnier than the actual unveiling, but perhaps that's just how I wrote it...

Thanks to VyingQuill for two very exceptionally nice reviews- I very much appreciate it; Harry Potter, who I have turned to the dark side, (Hp/G) and Sailor-Knight Shadowstar: a Harry in denial is a very funny Harry; sometimes he can't see the forest for the trees. Or the other way around.

Anyway, every review is very much appreciated!

Tah!