I realized that life may or may not be a fairytale… it all depends on how you see it.
You're probably thinking I lived a princess-like life when I was a teenager. Well, I'd like to tell you I did… with my prince charming and our enchanted castle. Unfortunately, I did not. I was one of those that you'd call a nobody. I was always teased in school because of my all time crush—Harry Potter (I'd laugh at the thought of it now…). Nobody ever noticed me… except perhaps the teachers. But what would I do with teachers who would only praise me because of my talents and knowledge? I can't take Professor Binns out to Hogsmeade and have some hot butterbeer, can I? So I might say I was boring when I was a teenager.
Summer days were only fun because Harry was with us. (He moved in during the summer before my 5th year in Hogwarts.) I get to drool over him in my room window when he's out on the fields playing Quidditch with Ron and the twins. One time when we were having dinner, he accidentally spilled his water on me… of course I got wet. Oh how I remember the days… he wouldn't stop apologizing!
Anyway, being the youngest and only girl, I was abused! (In a manner of speaking…) "Ginny, baby, could you set the table for mommy dear?" "Ginny! My dear sister Ginny… I left my wand upstairs, could you get it for me please? Thank you." I was stuck! I couldn't get myself out! I was always seen whenever there was something to do, or an errand to run. I thought to myself, it would have been better if I ended up being a gnome!
I always thought I'd die a boring and merciless life. But after I got myself a job at the Ministry of Magic, I felt a little easy. Why don't we go 30 years back and see what happened…
I've just turned 20. I'm not sure if this goes with age but I'm starting to see that life isn't a waste after all—my life, to be exact! I have a great job, good friends, a kind boyfriend… aahh… this is the life!
I've only started my second year at the office and just when I thought everything was turning out ok, crap comes along. How nice of fate to bring us together… under one department! The ultimate nightmare, one's worst enemy, a total pain—Draco Malfoy!
What is he doing here? Isn't he supposed to be buried with his crackpot father, Lucius?! How could they accept him in the Ministry? He's evil! He doesn't belong here! This isn't fair, I'm quitting!
"You can't quit! Just because Draco was assigned as your partner? C'mon honey, you can do better than that."
"But Dad?! How would you expect me to work with people I hate?"
"No. Hate is a bad word. Hating is not good. Besides, why do you hate Draco?"
What's with the "Draco" thing? It's so irritating! Dad doesn't understand. Just because Lucius Malfoy died 3 years ago and Narcissa lightened up again, he really thinks they're ok. They're not so bad, once you see the good side, he would tell me. But there isn't a good side… not one! Not even a strand of Malfoy-hair is good. I don't understand why my parents can't see that. Look at my mom! She's good friends with the dull and boring mother! Oh, they've seen nothing yet!
"He's a Malfoy, Dad. I am a Weasley. Weasleys were born to hate Malfoys. You hated Malfoys before, I don't know what has gotten into you that made you think of even—"
"You see, honey… things are bound to change. You never know… why, you might end up marrying Draco!"
"DAD!! DON'T SAY THAT!!!! I'm you're daughter! How could you speak such unthinkable crime in front of me!?!" How could he do this? I'm his daughter for Pete's sake! How could he sit there and read the paper and even manage to insult me and then look so cool? I'm here standing in front of his desk, going all red—as red as my hair, maybe? I could just pop in front of him and he probably won't notice! He thinks this is a joke, huh? He thinks it's funny that I would go through all the trouble of practicing my lines just to convince him that I am not working with that dimwit!
"Don't be silly squirt."
"I'm quitting, Dad!"
"No you're not."
"I mean it!"
"No you don't."
"How could you be so—cruel—Dad!? First you give me Flint for a boss, and now Malfoy?! What else?! Why can't I have Sean … or… or Tom! Tom Felton? Why does it have to be Malfoy!? Huh, Dad?"
"What is it that you hate with these lads? They're nice, are they not?"
"NO! I really, really mean it, Dad! I am not working with MALFOY!"
"Virginia Weasley… how cute." Don't say it. I know. I ended up staying. After all those outbursts! I never knew my dad wasn't easy to convince. And I actually thought I could get away with it!
With Malfoy as my partner, things couldn't have gotten any worse. The first few weeks were really maddening, I tell you. All day everyday, he would do nothing but insult me. "Hey Weasley, are you sure you're supposed to be doing this? I mean are you not poor enough to rob a bank or something?" "You know, Weasel, your dimwit brother shouldn't have married Granger, or else they'd be making a whole lot of weasels with mud in their blood, don't you think?"
There was this one time when I couldn't stand it anymore. He was just starting with fresh insults when I started at him myself: "What dimwit? What is it this time? Huh? The usual? Damn it, aren't you getting tired of the same crap? I'm starting to think that you're losing touch! It's not working, asshole!! So if I were you, I'd drop it and get a life instead!"
We were both shocked at first, but after a few seconds, he managed to smile at me. Not grin, not smirk, smile. It was really odd, I tell you. It helped though, the incident, I mean. I guess he thinks I can stand up for myself now so he probably decided to drop a little of the insults and everything that goes with it… he still irritates me, though.
***
It's the 13th of October and I'm just killing time here in my desk. I don't know, really, what I'm doing nothing for when there are supposed to be loads of work to do. It usually gets busy during this time of year. People are rushing things up so they wouldn't have to when Christmas rush is just around the corner. I don't understand. Everything's done under my department… it's really… unusual.
There's nothing else to do. I might as well go home. Yes, I will go home, rather than being stuck with Malfoy? I'd prefer being stuck with our garden gnomes, thank you. Right, I'm on my way out and I come across bullshit. Just great.
"What now? What's in store for me today, Malfoy?" He was looking at me as if it was his first time to see me… his look is like a cross between confusion and surprise… and stupidity. He opened his mouth to speak, and then closed it again.
"I'm at a loss for words—" I'm surprised! 'I'm at a loss for words' is not what I'm expecting to hear! Is this supposed to be a joke? For the first time in history of Wizard-kind, Malfoy made me laugh—out loud!
"What?" He was smiling, "What??"
"You're at a loss for words? Oh come on Malfoy… there's got to be something in there, 'else it'd be history!" I was still laughing at him. He looks so—!
"Oh yea? How cute is that? Look at you, you're really enjoying this, aren't you?"
"Hundred percent."
"Where are you going, anyway?" HA! Change topic… defense mechanism.
"Home. Where I can't spend the rest of the afternoon with my idiotic partner. Works here are done, anyway… so I won't have to worry about anything. Except maybe my plan on how to get you fired…" I was still shaking with laughter at that.
"Very clever, squirt. Too bad, I was going to ask you to grab a bite with me…. Nothing much, just some pasties, maybe…? And probably a little hot butterbeer to go with it. Just to… you know… warm us in this cold Friday afternoon." This time, my laughter ended and the usual look was back on my face. And damn it! Pasties and butterbeer, my favorite!
"C'mon Malfoy, you're wasting my precious time. Just tell me what you're up to. You gonna kill me on our way out? Huh? Or have you prepared to poison me in the middle of our 'bite?' You know what, I don't even know why I'm standing here in front of you and listening to you talk—the way you always do—nonsense. I'm sorry… could you tell me?"
"Honestly, Ginny, you tickle my fancy… let's go." YUCK! What was that all about?! You tickle my fancy?! Ew! Probably the most disgusting thing I've heard in ages!
"Forget it, Malfoy. Go and get someone else you could poison 'cuz I ain't comin' with you. Now, if you could get out of my way …" What a moron. What, he thinks he's some kind of god or something? A lunatic is what he is… asshole.
"You know I don't take no for an answer. And besides… can you resist it? Butterbeer and pasties… mm.. mm.. mmm……" Can he be any more idiotic than he already is? Honestly!
"Would you mind stepping aside…? Your enormous head is blocking the doorway, in case you haven't noticed."
"Would I mind, you ask? Actually, yes. Come on, squirt. You're coming with me." He has no right, no right at all, to call me squirt! Who does he think he is? Right. Like he can just do as he pleases?! He really thinks that he can do everything, his way?! Well, why won't he just shove his filth up his stinkin' ass?!
Great. There you go again, Ginny, really. Why don't YOU go and SHOVE it up HIS ass! Don't just explode inside! Bring it outside! What kind of witch are you?
Of course! HA! Ha.. hm…I'll tell him alright! I sure will… right… any minute now. I'm just waiting for the right timing… and strength. Probably this butterbeer will do the—wait a minute! Butterbeer? Pasties? What the—? He tricked me! He tricked me! That shithead!
"Hey… eat the food, not me. The way you look at me, looks like you're going to eat me." If I was a beast… I would have eaten this shit in front of me—alive!
"Asshole. Don't you smile at me! You stupid git. I'm going home." What's this…? What gives him the right to grab my arm? I don't want his filth to infect me.
"Ginny… don't go. C'mon. Sit down. Eat with me. Let's talk. Please…?" Since when did he learn to say please?
"What's with you? You're acting weird. You freak me out." Honestly, this isn't him. What happened to the devilish moron? Some angelic alien took over or something? Or I'm the one who's dreaming… this is really creepy.
Well, I should tell you, I'm good with words but never good with actions. I didn't know what made me do it, but I sat back down and ate with him, like he said. It wasn't so bad… we did talk. And I found out he has a good sense of humor. It was a little chat but I found out many—good—things about him. He's not so bad, if he's in a good mood (duh!) And he should smile more often, the way he did earlier at the office. I hope he's this way all the time. It was just then that I knew how… "ok" he can be sometimes. If didn't know him any better, I'd say he's a good person. Well, maybe he is, I just don't know it. Maybe I haven't seen anything yet… maybe he has a heart… maybe…
We kept talking and talking, we didn't realize we've been in the diner for three hours already. And so we finally stood. He walked me home but he left me only at the corner where he can see me walk myself to the path leading to the back door. He reckons—and I very much agree with him—that if Ron sees us together, talking and laughing, he'll strangle us both, right then and there. So we figured it would be safer to do that. I couldn't blame him though, for hating Malfoy that much, I mean. He has his reasons… I do too. And we may have talked and got to know each other a little better, that does not change the fact that he is a Malfoy.
***
Things are really hectic at the Ministry. People show up unannounced, and tons of works are loaded in our department. Just the other day, we were sent a bundle of Muggle action figures because somewhere around England some Witch or Wizard cast a spell on it to make it move. It was confiscated and was brought to us. We spent at whole week trying to fix it.
You might wonder what happened between Malfoy and me (since it's been weeks that we've became friends…) 'Cuz I think I know what's running in your mind at this very moment. Sorry to break your heart… I have a boyfriend (if that's what you're thinking.) We get along, though. We talk, we laugh, but that's that. He learned how to smile at me already… he always does, every time we would catch each other's eyes. He's not so bad… and I guess the poison didn't work, I'm still very much alive! He's ok, and I mean it. I don't know what happened but he's changed. And I don't know if everybody else at the Ministry noticed it, since many people treat him like they always do. They still seem so bitter… it's strange.
"Well, you know, you can't have everything in life—why, hello Malfoy." I reserved a pretty little smile for him today. I figured if he's all smiles to me, then I might as well give him my reserved smiles… he's changed, right?
"Weasel, who's your friend?"
"Malfoy, this—this is Emma…" I don't understand…
"Pleasure. Ginny, I better be off. I still have to meet Rupert down at King's Cross. See yah…"
I've been dreading this… honestly. I mean, I thought he was good for good. But then, his ugly smirk is back, and the tone of his voice, it was… it sounded like a Malfoy. Don't tell me the angelic alien went back to its planet.
"Busy week, isn't it, Ginny?" What is up with this guy?
"Huh? Ah… I guess…"
"What's up, Ginny? You want to tell me?" One minute he's a freak and then the next he's someone you can talk to? He is a lunatic!
"Nothing." I was kind of upset, really…
It's not that I was humiliated or anything, it's just that I was surprised to see the old Malfoy back. I've—honestly—I've learned to like the new Malfoy and seeing the old one isn't very… delightful, you know.
I left early. I wanted to ask him the day after but I couldn't seem to get the words out—and in. He seems to be in high spirits. He keeps talking and laughing. He probably enjoys the day… Woke up on the right side of the bed, didn't he? Well, I find it rather annoying, really.
"Ginny, you don't seem to be in a good mood. Is something wrong? Are you ok?"
"Just don't talk to me right now, alright Malfoy? I'm—I'm quite busy." That's a lie. But I just gave him a faint smile and didn't bother to see his reaction anymore.
The next day was dull. There was stiffness in the air. He doesn't talk much. He looks sad, actually. He probably thinks I'm mad at him or something. I gave it a thought and wondered why I made such a big fuss out of it. And so I dropped it. I was ready to swallow my pride and forget it… When I came in our office, he was there, with some friends of his back at Hogwarts.
"Ah, Weasel. You remember Crabbe and Goyle?"
"Yah." It was a bit sour…
"Draco, you work with Weasley?" Fat bastard.
"Yea, unfortunately. It's not so bad…" Unfortunately? Just the other day he told me that he was enjoying himself at work! Unfortunately?!
I stayed out of the office until I was sure that the two bloody bastards were out. When I came in, he didn't look as jolly as he was a few moments ago. I closed the door behind me and sat on my desk, facing him. I don't know how I would start, and I don't know if I wanted to hex him or yell at him with all my heart or whatever it is that I might brutally do. But I guess I don't have to…
"Ginny… I'm sorry. You know me, I'm a big bully and—" Believe me when I say he looks really, really jittery. But in his eyes I saw sincerity and in his voice I heard that he was truly sorry.
"No Malfoy, don't—. I know you… it's me I don't know. I don't understand why I even bother to let you upset me. You've insulted me all your life—and mine—I should get used to it, really. Just… just forget it." I cannot believe I am letting this slip! I might be in some kind of trance or something, this isn't me. Letting Malfoy get away with it? I must be mad!
"Are—are you sure?" He himself is surprised. This must be really… big! "You're not gonna beat me or anything? Just like that?"
"I guess so, just like that…" Just like that. This is weird.
Well, there were no more visitors after that so we had all the time to finish whatever we had to for the day. There wasn't much to talk about but I'm sure Malfoy was feeling lighter. Don't ask me why, I'm just sure of it. (Actually, I based it on the way he smiles at me. Looks like every smile comes with a relieved sigh … again, don't ask me.)
***
From this very minute, we have exactly one month before Christmas. People are getting busy, stores are on sale, houses are decorated, snow is starting to fall… the Christmas Spirit, should I say.
Malfoy seems to be avoiding other people lately. Every time a friend or someone comes in, he's out—he always has an excuse. He doesn't tell me… because you know, he could at least let me know why he has to leave me with all the entertaining every time he goes I-don't-know-where!
But there was this one time when Justin popped in and he didn't even bother to leave! (I suppose you know Justin Finch-Fletchey? He's my boyfriend of 7 months…)
"Sweety, this is a surprise… what are you doing here?" I hope I didn't sound too demanding. You see, Justin is the kind of guy who would suspect you with just about anything and everything if you give him even just one wrong tone of questioning. O yea… that's him alright.
"Oh nothing. I just decided to drop by and give my baby a little smooch…" Ugh. I don't know if what we heard was on purpose or just coincidental but somewhere around the office, some disturbing noise could be heard. This caught the attention of Justin… (Thank goodness.)
"Ah, Malfoy. How are you, mate?"
"Great." How insulting! That was the most lifeless answer I have ever heard. I wonder… why is he not offending us? I've always thought he thinks our relationship is a joke. Millicent told me once, because she says he's always talking about it every time he sees us together.
Justin didn't stay long. He says he forgot to fix something up or whatever… I don't know. I made sure that after the door was closed, I was out of earshot before speaking.
"What, no insults today?" It wasn't that stiff, though. I was more of a joke, actually.
"Nope. Not today."
"How come? You scared of Justin smashing you to pieces…?" I said that just so I had something to say. I'm 100.1 percent sure Justin wouldn't do that. He doesn't fight… never a war-freak, that guy.
"'Course not. I'm not scared of anybody—except maybe you." He looked me straight in the eye and grinned.
"Haha." Ha…
"So—why Justin?" Excuse me?
"What? That's a rather personal question."
"C'mon… you can tell me… why Justin?"
"Well… I don't know."
"You don't know? Nah.. that's stupid. Now come on, tell me."
I'm serious, I don't know. I guess I forgot. It's ok, isn't it? Oh well… I told him. I explained to him… our relationship… our ups and downs… everything. He's not a very good audience if you ask me. He growls at my ups and laughs at my downs. And he kept asking me about the things I find so irritating about our relationship and Justin himself. It's weird. He's weird. I practically told him the story of my love life. Isn't that just the most peculiar thing?
I was sitting in my room that night and was wondering about what Malfoy said. It is stupid. I don't know why I chose Justin? Isn't that supposed to be something? He's my boyfriend, I should know. Oh well… so what? Probably most girlfriends don't know why they chose their boyfriends.
"No, Ginny. Most girlfriends know why they chose their boyfriends. Ask whoever and she'll tell you." I was itching to ask, and so I did. I asked Hermione what her reasons were for marrying Ron and she gave me pretty good answers. But she said the most important was "because I love him." She told me off for not answering that right away when Malfoy asked me. (She doesn't miss a thing… she's my sister and I tell her everything.)
"I don't know, Hermione. I just… don't know. He's a good guy, I know he is."
"Well then what's wrong? You love him, don't you?"
"Ye—I think so…"
"You think so?! Ginny! You can't tell me you think so! A question such as that is only answerable by YES or NO! 'I think so' is invalid!"
"Well… there are some things that I don't approve of. It's stupid, really. Like the way he talks—baby talk. It's so irritating! And every time he shows up unannounced, it surprises me. And then when I ask him he suspects me! It's insulting, you know. And! And, and… the way he locks his hand in mine, it feels… wrong!"
"You loved that! You told me so the first time you went out… 'How he holds my hand real tight… oh Hermione, he's so sweet!' Ginny, tell me right now… do you or do you not love him?"
I couldn't answer her straight away. I can't even look her in the eyes. This is strange. Something's wrong… I mean, he seems so distant. To tell you the truth, I'm closer with Malfoy than I am with my own boyfriend. Not that it matters, it doesn't. Just that this should be telling me something. I'm afraid it's true… our relationship is falling apart.
The next few days weren't helping at all…
First, I come in an office with distraction in it. Seems as if Malfoy's old friends from Slytherin decided to have a little reunion in our office. I would have let it pass if they weren't making such a mess. And they kept making fun of me! Teasing me and all… "That's it! I'm going out." They were still teasing me when I went out. And you know what's worst, Malfoy didn't even dare to stop them or apologize or anything! He just sat there, staring. I'll get back to him! I swear!
Just when I thought that was the worst… Justin comes along and helps ruin my day and our relationship. "What's with you? Don't look at me like that!" Well, stupid, if I wasn't in such a bad mood, I'd probably look at you like you were a gift to me, you moron! He's not helping at all! I thought boyfriends are there to calm you down when you're about to explode? Or patch things up when he notices that things are not doing so well…? He sure isn't one! "You're angry at Malfoy? Why, what did he do?" "You're going out with him, aren't you? Why do you always exchange cute smiles?" "Why do you spend so much time with Malfoy? You like him don't you?" Could he be any more stupid? He asks the most unusual questions ever! I couldn't take it anymore, I threw it back at him: "For the love of god, Justin, will you for once grow up?! What is it with you? You irritate me! How stupid can you get? I am not going out with Malfoy and I don't— even if I did, would you care? You don't seem to know what's going on anymore! You don't even notice how our relationship gets boring every time we're together! You know what, I'm done with this bullshit. I'm sick and tired of being little-miss-understanding. I'm tired of being always so considerate! It's over." And with that, I lost my boyfriend of almost eight months. I really don't give a damn, in case you were wondering. For four months I've been ignoring my instincts that this relationship is getting weak. It's really thanks to Malfoy that I realized I should have said something from the start.
When I came home, I heard mom and dad talking in the kitchen. I showed up and went to the living room. I threw myself at the couch in front of the fireplace. I closed my eyes and was just thinking about the chaos when I heard them talking about me. They probably thought I went upstairs to my room.
"She doesn't seem to be in a good state of mind, dear, do you think we should tell her still…?"
"Yes… tell me." I answered before dad can. I went to the kitchen and sat in front of them. "What is it?"
"I don't know, honey. You seem really—burdened. Are you sure you could take in more?
"Yes. Sure. Pretty sure."
"You see… Grandpa's sick and… well… Granny has to take care of him… and… they might not spend the Holidays with us this year. "
"Grandpa's sick? Holidays without them? Oh geesh! What could be worse?"
"Uh… honey? Mommy and daddy have to spend the Holidays with them…"
Great. This has got to be the worst time of my entire life! I don't know what to do… I'm confused, something's bothering me, I don't know what. AH! I feel like hell!
I talked to Hermione that night. I told her everything I was thinking… I was feeling. My problems, my worries… everything.
It's good to have Hermione around. I have someone to talk to, pour my problems with. Good thing Ron married her… and I hope her upcoming baby's a girl… then we'd have an angel…
I went down to the office a little later than usual. The other departments have already closed up and the others still are closing up. We're about to close up as well, there's nothing much to do anyway… And the people are very little it can only be counted with your fingers…
When I arrived at my office door, there waits the name WEASLEY-MALFOY: Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Department. Stinkin filth! I opened it and saw him sitting there… dumb-ass!
"Ginny—you're here. Thank goodness. Listen, about the other day—"
"Shut up. I don' wanna hear it. I know what you're doing Malfoy—and don't give me that look! You know perfectly well what I'm talking about, you asshole. You think you can just do that? Play with people's minds? Why? You think it's funny? IT'S NOT! It sucks! You suck! I should have known from the start that you would always be the same imbecile! You half-witted skum!"
I burst out of the office just as Hermione came in. She didn't come with me outside… she just let me cry… all alone. I sat in the waiting couch just outside the office. I heard him speak but all I can make out is "… never meant… how much it… really sorry…" Yea right. I didn't leave until I heard what Hermione had to say to him. It was loud and clear, "You know Malfoy, you shouldn't have been moronic at least to Ginny. God knows how soft and loving that girl is… not to mention understanding. You could at least have been a little considerate. She was. She always swallows her pride and forgets how cruel you've been to her all her life. And what great timing too! She's not having a 'merry little Christmas' you know. With our grandparents and all… and add up Justin—" "What's wrong with Justin?" What do you care? If I had the courage, I'd burst in again and rub it to him… "They broke up. But I guess you were too busy messing up to notice that your only partner is about to go mad… Why do you have to be so hard, Malfoy? And of all people—Ginny?! Thanks a million, Malfoy, really…"
She kept on talking but I couldn't bear anymore. I left. Went down to the Ministry Courtyard and gave myself a little time alone. I can't believe all this is happening to me at one time! Christmas! Just wonderful. I don't understand myself anymore… I'm so lost I don't know what to do!
***
It's been a week now… I'm still bummed. Mom and dad left yesterday… to spend the Holidays with Gramma and Grampa… It's so lousy here at home. Christmas is tomorrow, what are we supposed to do? This is so lame…
I thought it was just my imagination but there really is an owl tapping at my window. Probably mom and dad… but…
Ginny, please…. Give me time to explain. Please just listen to me.. to what I have to say. Ministry Courtyard, 10:30? Please Ginny, I know you'll be there… I'll wait.
D. Malfoy
10:30.. it's 10 o'clock. This guy is so good at this.
I was thinking of not showing up. Maybe I won't… but like I said, I'm only good with words.
I showed up a quarter before 11. He was sitting in one of the benches, checking the time every now and then. I walked slowly towards him, but I didn't say anything… I just stood and waited…
"Ginny! You came…"
"I'm not like you… I'm considerate…. Now, what do you want?"
"Ginny, listen. I'm really, really, really sorry. Really, I am." Looks like it. "Please, forgive me. I know I'm rude. I know I'm stupid… I'm an idiot, a moron, a dimwit… I'm everything you ever hate, but please… I beg you to forgive me. I don't know how I would take it if you don't… Look, there's no use trying to pretend…. Honestly, Ginny… I've always wanted to be your friend.. I've always wanted to be close to you… Be proud to tell other people that 'she's a very good friend of mine… she's special to me… she's part of my life…' You have no idea how important it is to me that I be a part of your life too… even if—even if we're just friends. And I would do anything for you to forgive me… anything. I'd move out of the office—of the Ministry, if you told me so. Even if I had to lose my job and friends and everything just to be friends with you again, I don't care. I'd be willing to give it all up. If you told me to pound my—"
"Stop."
"Sorry…" I looked down. I don't know what I was looking at… I just had to look down just so I can hide my tears. But he held my head up and wiped my tears… "Please, Ginny. Don't cry. I hate to see you cry… it crashes my heart…. Especially if I'm the reason you're wasting your tears away. Please stop crying…" How can I stop crying if he's being so damn good to me? "Ginny?"
"Draco…" I'm sure—so sure—that he was as surprised as I am… saying it and hearing it.
"I'm really sorry…"
"It's ok. I don't want you out of the office—or the Ministry, and you're not everything I ever hate."
We talked for what seemed like ages… and it was fun being friends with him again. It's like seeing your favorite doll after a long time of looking… it's wonderful.
I understand now why I was so frustrated that Malfoy and I fought. It's because of fear of losing a friend I've never had before. It's fear of losing the friend I've always been looking for. But now I know I have nothing to fear because I am as special to him as he is to me. It's something only the both of us can understand…
I thought I was going to have the worst Christmas ever, but Draco was kind enough to cheer me up. He gave me a Japanese dinner set for Christmas. Now I have another thing to add up to my collection of Japanese wares that he gave me before—for no reason at all. He knows me too well…
Ron disapproves of this, of course. He's the only one who objects. But Hermione told him to leave it because if he won't she'd name their first child after Draco… and especially because there was nothing he could do about it.
We were having picnic on the warm blanket that we laid on the snowy grass. Draco's head was lying on my outstretched legs. He was very quiet. I know something's going on in his mind but I didn't want to ask him…
He broke the silence…
"Ginny, do you love me?"
"Of course I do… you're Draco, aren't you?
"Yes, but do-you-love-me?" he looked at me in the eyes but he didn't move. I looked down at him. I am looking at the man I never thought would make me happy…
"Why?" Don't point that finger at me… if you were in my place, you'd ask the same question—unless you were… never mind…
"Because I do. I love you, Ginny. For 3 years, I've loved you and it's just now that I have gained the courage to let you know how I feel." He sat up and faced me… am I really hearing this? "I love you… So much, I want to grow old with you in our little Japanese-style house that I would so much willingly build with my bare hands. I'd spend my whole life cleaning up and fixing the house until you're satisfied with its neatness. I'd cook for you for the everyday of our lives—breakfast, lunch, dinner even your snacks. I'd memorize the recipe of butterbeer so that I can make a whole pool just for you. I will learn the importance of separating whites from colored every time we do the laundry. I will stay up all night scrubbing the kitchen floor—no magic—if you accidentally spilled the sauce. I'd go to French School if all of a sudden you decide to speak French. I will always make it a point to feed the pets… whatever pet you want—owl, dog, cat rabbit, hamster, even dragons! Whatever pet you desire… if you want a snake, I'll give you a snake—even if I hate them. I'd overcome my fear just for you. I'm scared of snakes but it's even scarier not to have you in my life. You changed me; you're my inspiration. You mean everything to me…you're—you're my life… and I love my life… very much…"
I don't know what to say… the type of guy I've been longing to meet sits right here, in front of me. I never knew it was Draco Malfoy all along…
"Draco I… I c— this is so hard for me. Everything happens so fast. I don't know—"
"If you tell me you can't, I'll understand, and I'll wait. Even if you decide to tell me when we're already 70, I'll wait. But if you tell me you don't—I'd… I dunno…"
I didn't tell him I don't… but I didn't tell him I do, either. I didn't tell him anything. He understood, but I'm sure that somehow, I hurt him.
I hurt him? Then what do you think I'm in now? I made the most absurd mistake that I can ever think of… I let him slip…
How could I be so stupid?!
Harry saw me crying and asked why I was so upset. All I told him was: "It's D—Malfoy.." He told me he'd pound him if I told him to. I'd very much like to tell him that he should pound me instead. I don't know what to do… where to start.
I'll talk to him. He did so much of his part already… now it's my turn.
I went to his house but the butler told me he's out. Well, there's only one place he could be… Ministry Courtyard. It's always so peaceful there…
"I hope you prepared the hammer and nails to build that house of ours…"
"Ginny!"
"Hi. Sorry… sorry you had to wait."
"What made you—?"
"Well… it's always thanks to you… I realized I've made a mistake. The mistake of ignoring my feelings. And, I figured, if I don't follow what my heart tells me, I just might lose my prince charming…"
Sometimes, we get confused with which to follow… heart or mind. They say, the heart is poor in making decisions, but the heart has reasons not even the mind can explain…
So, that's that. That was the start of my fairytale 30 years ago. Now look at me… all wrinkled and old. But I should tell you, I never regretted the day when I followed my heart. Look where it lead me to—a house I've always dreamed of… children I've seen from childhood to parenthood… industrious owls, courageous dogs… and of course… the best of all… Draco…
It's in this house that I saw all the magic that not even the greatest Witch or Wizard can make… It's in this house that I realized—life may or may not be a fairytale… it all depends on how you see it…
I'm Ginny Weasley-Malfoy. It was a pleasure sharing my fairytale with you…