DISCLAIMER (whoo hoo!): I don't own any of the DBZ characters, so don't sue
me. All persons in this story are fictional, any similarities to persons
living or dead is completely coincidental.
*********
Vegeta growled protestantly as Bulma dragged him by the arm into their hover car. It was a beautiful sunny day where the temperature was well above normal and the Briefs family had convinced Vegeta to finally go with them to the circus.
"Bura, I will have your head for this", Vegeta threatened. Bura giggled and helped Bulma drag and push him into the car. Bulma got into the drivers seat, "alright, kids, buckle up!" She paused and glanced over to Vegeta, "you too, Veggie!" Vegeta growled deeply and grudgingly put on his seat belt.
To the children's relief, their father wasn't wearing spandex. After much convincing from Trunks, Vegeta realized that yes, blue tight spandex shorts would intimidate the dancing elephants. So he had to settle for a pair of off-white flannel shorts.
Bura put on her sunglasses and leaned over Vegeta and put his on him. "I hate family trips", he complained quietly. "What was that, Vegeta Briefs?" Bulma scolded with an edge to her usually warm voice. Vegeta shut up and growled as he heard giggling from the back seat.
Vegeta grumbled most of the way to the Sunflower Circus while Bulma entertained the kids with jokes and old gags. When they finally reached the brightly colored tent, Bura clapped her hands happily and urged Trunks to do the same. Vegeta got out of the badly parked car, "get out boy! You too, girl."
Bura laughed and skipped out into the sunshine. Trunks, in his early teen years, understood the sacred rules of "coolness" and came out pretending to be annoyed and distracted (although in secret, our purple haired prince was eager to see Jock Strap the clown drop his pinstriped pants). Bura clung onto Vegeta, "daddy! Me want a piggy back ride!"
Vegeta grimaced but let her crawl onto his back, and he held her there awkwardly. "Ha! Look at me, Twunks!" She teased. Bulma chuckled warmly and pulled Vegeta gently by the arm closer to the entrance. A depressed looking woman with a huge nose made even bigger with the fake red one and a cheap clown costume greeted the family.
"Uh, two children and two adults," Bulma told her as she handed the clown the money. Big nose gave her 4 tickets and motioned them in.
Bura was jumping up and down on Vegeta's back. His patience was starting to run out, "BURA!" He growled, his voice soon turned gentle when he remembered that it was his daughter that he was talking to, "daddy doesn't like people having fun on his back." Bura laughed and bounced harder, making Vegeta growl louder and louder, thus, frightening the other children in the audience.
Bulma slapped Vegeta's arm playfully, "stop growling, Veggie!" Vegeta sighed and stopped his annoying voice vibrations. Bulma pointed out seats near the stage and the family sat down.
Vegeta let go of the squirming Bura and let her sit beside her mother. Bura gawked at the colorful lights and the massive audience in which they were in. Trunks tried not to be impressed but couldn't help to drool happily.
The lights began to dim and the ring master came out, "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN." (Vegeta squirmed at the 'gentlemen' part) "BOYS AND GIRLS OF ALLLLLLL AGES!" The tuxedo clad fat man paused to see the audience's reaction so far, "WE WELCOME YOU TO SUNFLOWER CIRCUS!" Everyone one cheered enthusiastically and hooted. After the uproar had calmed down, Vegeta stood up and screamed, "DO YOU CALL YOUR SELF A MAN? HOW DARE YOU ADDRESS I, VEGETA PRINCE OF SAIYANS AS A GENTLEMAN, AS IF I WERE A COMMONER?!" He pounded his chest and was flushed in the face.
Bulma covered her face embarrassingly and tugged his flannel shorts annoyingly. "Vegeta...sit down.." She hissed quietly.
All heads turned towards Vegeta and stares were exchanged. Vegeta relaxed his muscles and sat down heavily on the bench. He shook the stares by glaring back. He crossed his arms defiantly, "KEEP GOING, LARD-BALL!" He ordered the ring master. The attention was then returned back to the fat man.
"Ahem.well, with no further ado or short men protesting, I introduce to you, Jock-strap the clown!" The ringmaster motioned to a nervous looking fat man to enter the stage. Jock Strap wobbled in with the strong appaulding from the audience.
Vegeta scoffed scornfully, "Bulma, this is a waste of money! I don't see why we paid to see someone dance suggestively in front of us!" Bulma ignored him and continued clapping happily with her children.
"Well, I'm Jock Strap, but you kids can call me Jocky!" Came the squeaky voice. Jocky walked over to a table and tripped over it. Loud laughter came from all directions in the audience.
"Whoops! Hey, who would like to help me put this table back up?" Jocky asked enthusiastically. Several hands rose up, but all were ignored. Instead, the spotlight fell on our spandex loving hero, Vegeta.
Vegeta's eyes flickered angrily as he heard snickering coming from behind and beside him. "How about you, sir? Jocky asked loudly. Vegeta spat on the ground and stood up. He walked out from his seat and entered the stage proudly.
Bura and Trunks gaped at their father. "Oh, dad!!" Trunks groaned. Bura giggled innocently and Bulma covered her face embarrassingly.
"And what is your name, sir?" Jocky inquired as he held a microphone under Vegeta's chin. Vegeta glared at him, "Vegeta." Jocky chuckled, "well, Veggie, how would you like to show the boys and girls how to set a table up?" "Shut up, ugly and let's get this over with!" Vegeta hissed. Jocky's eyes flickered angrily, but turned back to their usual watery brown ones.
"Alrighty, Mr. Veggie! Let's get started!" Jocky announced, failing his arms over his head, "well, first off, would you like to bend down and pick one leg up?" Vegeta bent down slowly and held one leg of the cheap table. The pervert of a clown came over and slapped his butt, causing our spandex loving hero to lose balance and fall on his face. Enthusiastic laughter came roaring from the audience.
Vegeta got up quickly and he blushed furiously. He grabbed the clown's multicolored shirt and breathed hotly into his face.
"Touch me again, fool, and you'll regret ever hearing the name 'Vegeta'!" He threatened coldly.
A sudden hush fell over the entire audience as Jocky blinked, bewildered. Vegeta turned his head and spat on the ground, "I'll let you go this time only because you are inferior. But next time." he let his voice trail off warningly.
Vegeta stomped back to his family dragged his entire family out as heads turned and stared at the Briefs. Trunks covered his face, but Bura seemed to enjoy the attention. Oblivious to the situation, she waved to the staring faces, "that's my daddy! He wears tighty-wighties!"
Vegeta turned to his baby girl and growled angrily but continued dragging a humiliated Bulma and the kids along past the entrance and out to the parking lot.
"Aw, dad!" Trunks complained, "that was soooo embarrassing!"
"Shush, Trunks." Bulma scolded gently, understanding how the boy felt.
"Hahaha! I think daddy looked funny with his big bum and the clown!" Bura shrieked playfully.
Vegeta's face had turned a dark crimson as he turned on their car and ordered them all in. The ride home was quiet except for the cracking of the steering wheel (our dignified Prince was gripping the wheel a bit too hard.).
That night, everyone had the usual chuckle and Bulma told Goku's family about the traumatizing situation Vegeta had gotten into. This humiliated the prince even more.
Vegeta climbed onto bed with Bulma that evening and could not fall asleep. Images of butt-slapping clowns kept flashing in his mind, barring his way (no pun intended) from his dreams.
When he did fall into sleep, it was uneasy and his dreams were strange.
Vegeta was dancing with elephants and he was wearing big flapping red shorts. He boogied, and shoogied. But he tried to keep himself from doing so. It was as if someone was controlling his body.
"AH HA HA HA HA !!" A sinister laugh suddenly came out of nowhere.
The dancing elephants disappeared. Leaving the flapping shorts Prince alone.in the dark.
Vegeta tried to stop himself from shaking and dancing, but he couldn't. "Who's there?" He demanded, "don't be a coward! Come and face me!"
A circle of stupidly clad clowns began to corner him. Vegeta tried dodging them, but it was as if his feet had a mine of their own. Vegeta screamed and began crying, "mommy! Mommy!"
Suddenly, the leader of the militia of clowns came into light and walked closer and closer to Vegeta. His face had a sinister smile; this same smile belonged to.. Jocky the butt slapper. "NO NO NO!" Vegeta cried. But the ring of clowns cornered him and he felt the fat hands of each clown hit his buttocks.
Vegeta sat straight up, he wasn't in a dark room with the butt slapping clowns, no, our Spandex loving protagonist was in his and Bulma's bed.
Vegeta gasped for air heavily, he felt sweat on his neck and forehead.
"Veggie-chan?" Bulma murmured as she opened her eyes and looked at the once panic-stricken Vegeta.
Vegeta glanced over his shoulder and looked at Bulma and then at the clock. It was 2:00 am. "Sorry about that, woman. It's just that.that stupid clown keeps bothering me." Bulma giggled and pulled Vegeta back into the covers, "are you sure you're not in love with him?" Vegeta's eyes widened, "Bulma! How dare you assume that!"
Bulma chuckled briefly and laid back down into the luxurious bed.
Vegeta wiped the sweat from his forehead and sighed. He lay back down heavily and tried to get faces of the clowns out of his mind. Later, he did fall asleep again, this time, he dreamed about his favorite animals and him dancing the Polka: unicorns.
The next morning, after the noisy breakfast and yelling at Trunks to get up, the family went out shopping. The Briefs finished the grocery shopping faster than usual so Bulma was cruising around lazily.
"Where do you kids wanna go?" Bulma offered.
Trunks nudged his sister, "let's go to the toy shop and buy clown masks to scare dad!" He whispered. Bura giggled hysterically as images of Vegeta and his huge bottom being slapped by a clown popped up in her little innocent mind.
"Mommy! Me and Twunks wanna go to Joys of Toys Center!" Bura squealed happily. Vegeta grimaced as his eardrum was abused by his daughter's high soprano voice.
He complained by growling as Bulma rolled into a parking space in front of the giant toy center.
"Vegeta, you don't have to go in with us if you don't want to", Bulma told him as she shut off the engine and got out of the car. Vegeta didn't respond, instead, he began meditating. Bura and Trunks leaped out and stretched their legs.
"Remember, kids, mommy will be waiting for you by the bench near the exit, okay?" Bulma explained carefully to the two children as the three walked into the store filled with other frantic mothers chasing after their children. Trunks grinned widely and Bura's eyes widened as she tried to absorb the heaven of toys she was in.
Bura's eye caught sight of a small porcelain doll. She began walking to it, enchanted.
"Come on, Bura! Let's go find those masks!" Trunks called as he dragged her by her neck (ha! Jk, I meant 'sleeve').
The two miniature humans roamed the entire area until they reached the "Costume" aisle.
"Hey! Bura! I found them!" Trunks cried out triumphantly when he pointed out two shelves full of brightly colored masks.
Bura laughed and grabbed a pink and white one.
"Me want this one, Twunks!" She cried gleefully as she put it on and ran around failing her arms wildly and crashing into other children. Trunks shook his head and took a blue and purple mask with a big red nose. He grinned mischievously and grabbed his sister's arm, "come on, Bura! Let's go! And bring your mask!"
Bulma finally gave in and bought the clown masks for the children. Trunks and Bura kept their newfound treasures hidden in Bulma's purse as they went traveled home.
Bulma hopped out of the car and opened the door of their mansion. Vegeta came out and sighed with relief, "woman! I'm hungry! Get me food!" Bulma helped the kids out and didn't look up at him, "well, I forgot to buy the groceries today.so I guess I'll go and buy them now." Vegeta ignored her and stormed into the house and placed his much-traumatized bum on the leather couch in front of the TV. He turned it on and flipped through the channels lazily.
Bulma raised an eyebrow and picked up her keys again, "Vegeta, Trunks and Bura! I'm going shopping grocery shopping for your fat lazy donkey of a father!" Bura giggled and Trunks grinned.
"Hey, mom, can Bura and me get our masks out to play, now?" Trunks asked, tugging Bulma's sleeve.
Bulma nodded and took out the plastic masks and handed them to Trunks. She then turned and closed the door. Trunks and Bura heard the hover car's engine turn on and they chuckled sheepishly.
Trunks rubbed his palms together and grinned mischievously, "Bura, the plot thickens." Bura laughed and flailed her arms around happily. And in doing so, her hand hit Trunks in the crotch----hard.
*********
Vegeta growled protestantly as Bulma dragged him by the arm into their hover car. It was a beautiful sunny day where the temperature was well above normal and the Briefs family had convinced Vegeta to finally go with them to the circus.
"Bura, I will have your head for this", Vegeta threatened. Bura giggled and helped Bulma drag and push him into the car. Bulma got into the drivers seat, "alright, kids, buckle up!" She paused and glanced over to Vegeta, "you too, Veggie!" Vegeta growled deeply and grudgingly put on his seat belt.
To the children's relief, their father wasn't wearing spandex. After much convincing from Trunks, Vegeta realized that yes, blue tight spandex shorts would intimidate the dancing elephants. So he had to settle for a pair of off-white flannel shorts.
Bura put on her sunglasses and leaned over Vegeta and put his on him. "I hate family trips", he complained quietly. "What was that, Vegeta Briefs?" Bulma scolded with an edge to her usually warm voice. Vegeta shut up and growled as he heard giggling from the back seat.
Vegeta grumbled most of the way to the Sunflower Circus while Bulma entertained the kids with jokes and old gags. When they finally reached the brightly colored tent, Bura clapped her hands happily and urged Trunks to do the same. Vegeta got out of the badly parked car, "get out boy! You too, girl."
Bura laughed and skipped out into the sunshine. Trunks, in his early teen years, understood the sacred rules of "coolness" and came out pretending to be annoyed and distracted (although in secret, our purple haired prince was eager to see Jock Strap the clown drop his pinstriped pants). Bura clung onto Vegeta, "daddy! Me want a piggy back ride!"
Vegeta grimaced but let her crawl onto his back, and he held her there awkwardly. "Ha! Look at me, Twunks!" She teased. Bulma chuckled warmly and pulled Vegeta gently by the arm closer to the entrance. A depressed looking woman with a huge nose made even bigger with the fake red one and a cheap clown costume greeted the family.
"Uh, two children and two adults," Bulma told her as she handed the clown the money. Big nose gave her 4 tickets and motioned them in.
Bura was jumping up and down on Vegeta's back. His patience was starting to run out, "BURA!" He growled, his voice soon turned gentle when he remembered that it was his daughter that he was talking to, "daddy doesn't like people having fun on his back." Bura laughed and bounced harder, making Vegeta growl louder and louder, thus, frightening the other children in the audience.
Bulma slapped Vegeta's arm playfully, "stop growling, Veggie!" Vegeta sighed and stopped his annoying voice vibrations. Bulma pointed out seats near the stage and the family sat down.
Vegeta let go of the squirming Bura and let her sit beside her mother. Bura gawked at the colorful lights and the massive audience in which they were in. Trunks tried not to be impressed but couldn't help to drool happily.
The lights began to dim and the ring master came out, "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN." (Vegeta squirmed at the 'gentlemen' part) "BOYS AND GIRLS OF ALLLLLLL AGES!" The tuxedo clad fat man paused to see the audience's reaction so far, "WE WELCOME YOU TO SUNFLOWER CIRCUS!" Everyone one cheered enthusiastically and hooted. After the uproar had calmed down, Vegeta stood up and screamed, "DO YOU CALL YOUR SELF A MAN? HOW DARE YOU ADDRESS I, VEGETA PRINCE OF SAIYANS AS A GENTLEMAN, AS IF I WERE A COMMONER?!" He pounded his chest and was flushed in the face.
Bulma covered her face embarrassingly and tugged his flannel shorts annoyingly. "Vegeta...sit down.." She hissed quietly.
All heads turned towards Vegeta and stares were exchanged. Vegeta relaxed his muscles and sat down heavily on the bench. He shook the stares by glaring back. He crossed his arms defiantly, "KEEP GOING, LARD-BALL!" He ordered the ring master. The attention was then returned back to the fat man.
"Ahem.well, with no further ado or short men protesting, I introduce to you, Jock-strap the clown!" The ringmaster motioned to a nervous looking fat man to enter the stage. Jock Strap wobbled in with the strong appaulding from the audience.
Vegeta scoffed scornfully, "Bulma, this is a waste of money! I don't see why we paid to see someone dance suggestively in front of us!" Bulma ignored him and continued clapping happily with her children.
"Well, I'm Jock Strap, but you kids can call me Jocky!" Came the squeaky voice. Jocky walked over to a table and tripped over it. Loud laughter came from all directions in the audience.
"Whoops! Hey, who would like to help me put this table back up?" Jocky asked enthusiastically. Several hands rose up, but all were ignored. Instead, the spotlight fell on our spandex loving hero, Vegeta.
Vegeta's eyes flickered angrily as he heard snickering coming from behind and beside him. "How about you, sir? Jocky asked loudly. Vegeta spat on the ground and stood up. He walked out from his seat and entered the stage proudly.
Bura and Trunks gaped at their father. "Oh, dad!!" Trunks groaned. Bura giggled innocently and Bulma covered her face embarrassingly.
"And what is your name, sir?" Jocky inquired as he held a microphone under Vegeta's chin. Vegeta glared at him, "Vegeta." Jocky chuckled, "well, Veggie, how would you like to show the boys and girls how to set a table up?" "Shut up, ugly and let's get this over with!" Vegeta hissed. Jocky's eyes flickered angrily, but turned back to their usual watery brown ones.
"Alrighty, Mr. Veggie! Let's get started!" Jocky announced, failing his arms over his head, "well, first off, would you like to bend down and pick one leg up?" Vegeta bent down slowly and held one leg of the cheap table. The pervert of a clown came over and slapped his butt, causing our spandex loving hero to lose balance and fall on his face. Enthusiastic laughter came roaring from the audience.
Vegeta got up quickly and he blushed furiously. He grabbed the clown's multicolored shirt and breathed hotly into his face.
"Touch me again, fool, and you'll regret ever hearing the name 'Vegeta'!" He threatened coldly.
A sudden hush fell over the entire audience as Jocky blinked, bewildered. Vegeta turned his head and spat on the ground, "I'll let you go this time only because you are inferior. But next time." he let his voice trail off warningly.
Vegeta stomped back to his family dragged his entire family out as heads turned and stared at the Briefs. Trunks covered his face, but Bura seemed to enjoy the attention. Oblivious to the situation, she waved to the staring faces, "that's my daddy! He wears tighty-wighties!"
Vegeta turned to his baby girl and growled angrily but continued dragging a humiliated Bulma and the kids along past the entrance and out to the parking lot.
"Aw, dad!" Trunks complained, "that was soooo embarrassing!"
"Shush, Trunks." Bulma scolded gently, understanding how the boy felt.
"Hahaha! I think daddy looked funny with his big bum and the clown!" Bura shrieked playfully.
Vegeta's face had turned a dark crimson as he turned on their car and ordered them all in. The ride home was quiet except for the cracking of the steering wheel (our dignified Prince was gripping the wheel a bit too hard.).
That night, everyone had the usual chuckle and Bulma told Goku's family about the traumatizing situation Vegeta had gotten into. This humiliated the prince even more.
Vegeta climbed onto bed with Bulma that evening and could not fall asleep. Images of butt-slapping clowns kept flashing in his mind, barring his way (no pun intended) from his dreams.
When he did fall into sleep, it was uneasy and his dreams were strange.
Vegeta was dancing with elephants and he was wearing big flapping red shorts. He boogied, and shoogied. But he tried to keep himself from doing so. It was as if someone was controlling his body.
"AH HA HA HA HA !!" A sinister laugh suddenly came out of nowhere.
The dancing elephants disappeared. Leaving the flapping shorts Prince alone.in the dark.
Vegeta tried to stop himself from shaking and dancing, but he couldn't. "Who's there?" He demanded, "don't be a coward! Come and face me!"
A circle of stupidly clad clowns began to corner him. Vegeta tried dodging them, but it was as if his feet had a mine of their own. Vegeta screamed and began crying, "mommy! Mommy!"
Suddenly, the leader of the militia of clowns came into light and walked closer and closer to Vegeta. His face had a sinister smile; this same smile belonged to.. Jocky the butt slapper. "NO NO NO!" Vegeta cried. But the ring of clowns cornered him and he felt the fat hands of each clown hit his buttocks.
Vegeta sat straight up, he wasn't in a dark room with the butt slapping clowns, no, our Spandex loving protagonist was in his and Bulma's bed.
Vegeta gasped for air heavily, he felt sweat on his neck and forehead.
"Veggie-chan?" Bulma murmured as she opened her eyes and looked at the once panic-stricken Vegeta.
Vegeta glanced over his shoulder and looked at Bulma and then at the clock. It was 2:00 am. "Sorry about that, woman. It's just that.that stupid clown keeps bothering me." Bulma giggled and pulled Vegeta back into the covers, "are you sure you're not in love with him?" Vegeta's eyes widened, "Bulma! How dare you assume that!"
Bulma chuckled briefly and laid back down into the luxurious bed.
Vegeta wiped the sweat from his forehead and sighed. He lay back down heavily and tried to get faces of the clowns out of his mind. Later, he did fall asleep again, this time, he dreamed about his favorite animals and him dancing the Polka: unicorns.
The next morning, after the noisy breakfast and yelling at Trunks to get up, the family went out shopping. The Briefs finished the grocery shopping faster than usual so Bulma was cruising around lazily.
"Where do you kids wanna go?" Bulma offered.
Trunks nudged his sister, "let's go to the toy shop and buy clown masks to scare dad!" He whispered. Bura giggled hysterically as images of Vegeta and his huge bottom being slapped by a clown popped up in her little innocent mind.
"Mommy! Me and Twunks wanna go to Joys of Toys Center!" Bura squealed happily. Vegeta grimaced as his eardrum was abused by his daughter's high soprano voice.
He complained by growling as Bulma rolled into a parking space in front of the giant toy center.
"Vegeta, you don't have to go in with us if you don't want to", Bulma told him as she shut off the engine and got out of the car. Vegeta didn't respond, instead, he began meditating. Bura and Trunks leaped out and stretched their legs.
"Remember, kids, mommy will be waiting for you by the bench near the exit, okay?" Bulma explained carefully to the two children as the three walked into the store filled with other frantic mothers chasing after their children. Trunks grinned widely and Bura's eyes widened as she tried to absorb the heaven of toys she was in.
Bura's eye caught sight of a small porcelain doll. She began walking to it, enchanted.
"Come on, Bura! Let's go find those masks!" Trunks called as he dragged her by her neck (ha! Jk, I meant 'sleeve').
The two miniature humans roamed the entire area until they reached the "Costume" aisle.
"Hey! Bura! I found them!" Trunks cried out triumphantly when he pointed out two shelves full of brightly colored masks.
Bura laughed and grabbed a pink and white one.
"Me want this one, Twunks!" She cried gleefully as she put it on and ran around failing her arms wildly and crashing into other children. Trunks shook his head and took a blue and purple mask with a big red nose. He grinned mischievously and grabbed his sister's arm, "come on, Bura! Let's go! And bring your mask!"
Bulma finally gave in and bought the clown masks for the children. Trunks and Bura kept their newfound treasures hidden in Bulma's purse as they went traveled home.
Bulma hopped out of the car and opened the door of their mansion. Vegeta came out and sighed with relief, "woman! I'm hungry! Get me food!" Bulma helped the kids out and didn't look up at him, "well, I forgot to buy the groceries today.so I guess I'll go and buy them now." Vegeta ignored her and stormed into the house and placed his much-traumatized bum on the leather couch in front of the TV. He turned it on and flipped through the channels lazily.
Bulma raised an eyebrow and picked up her keys again, "Vegeta, Trunks and Bura! I'm going shopping grocery shopping for your fat lazy donkey of a father!" Bura giggled and Trunks grinned.
"Hey, mom, can Bura and me get our masks out to play, now?" Trunks asked, tugging Bulma's sleeve.
Bulma nodded and took out the plastic masks and handed them to Trunks. She then turned and closed the door. Trunks and Bura heard the hover car's engine turn on and they chuckled sheepishly.
Trunks rubbed his palms together and grinned mischievously, "Bura, the plot thickens." Bura laughed and flailed her arms around happily. And in doing so, her hand hit Trunks in the crotch----hard.