OPEN YOUR EYES

Chapter 4: You're In My Head – Ephram

                "Damnit!" I swore. "Damn!"

                Amy had just walked away from me again. Again! She never gave me the opportunity to just talk to her. And she never told me what she was thinking.

                But then again—did she ever? I sighed. This girl was just too much for me.

                And despite the fact that she played with my head and my feelings, making me think at one moment that there might be something there and then the next moment completely contradicting thought, and that she was in love with Colin, and that I deserved to be treated much better…I think I was in love with her.

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                I sat staring at my computer screen. It was blank. Just a white space with that stupid flashing cursor. I was trying to get a head start on my English paper about abortion, but how was I supposed to concentrate on abortions when Amy was at the hospital. With Colin. Who was now awake and could remember at any moment who Amy was. Colin was real again. I couldn't deal with that.

                I glanced over at my clock. 11:30. I figured I'd had enough and decided to start getting ready to go to sleep. Sighing, I shut down and flipped the switch on my computer. I dropped my head down on my desk, emotionally and physically worn-out. Damn her. She gets in the way of everything. Now she's even in the way of me having normal thoughts. Hell, she's in the way of me having a normal life. I'm not going to be able to think about anything but her until—

                My thoughts were interrupted by the shrill, annoying ring of the phone. Scowling, I snatched it up. "Hello?" I spat out.

                "Ephram?" a small voice said questioningly.

                "Oh, hey. I was just thinking about you," I said casually, trying to play off the fact that I never stopped thinking about her.

                "Can you come outside?" It sounded like she was crying. She sounded lost. Alone. Even a little…scared. A sniff confirmed my suspicions. I always was good at guessing emotions.

                What the hell could have happened? "Amy, what's wrong?" I asked her softly. "Where are you?"

                "Just come outside. I'm on your porch. Please."

                I took a quick glance out the window. It was cold, it was snowing, I was tired. But Amy was standing there, bits of snow clinging to her hair, clad in nothing but that thin corduroy jacket she always wore and jeans, holding a cell phone and looking up at me.

                And naturally, my reply was, "Gimme a sec."

                I hung up the phone, yanked my coat off the back of my computer chair, and hastily managed to pull the first pair of shoes I saw. I raced downstairs, noticing my dad's light was off on the way down.

                The moment I opened the front door, the cold stung my face. And then something stung my heart when I looked at Amy, sitting on my porch swing and looking at me like a child whose lost their parents in the mall. There were no tears in her eyes, but her red eyes and damp cheeks gave the indication that she had been crying. She was silently inviting me over to the swing, and the second I saw what a wreck she was, I immediately went over and hugged her gently.

                I let myself enjoy the embrace for a second before pulling back, but as I went to sit dwon beside her, she caught my hand. I looked at her, shocked. She was never one to be affectionate. She didn't smile. Or do much of anything but stare at me. But the way she was staring at me—so strangely, like she was looking at something off in distance, that I couldn't see. She gripped my hand tighter, and finally opened her mouth to speak. "I—Colin. He had no idea."

                I think I understood. I, personally hated Colin for the sole fact that he was in possession of Amy's heart, but Amy looked so heartbroken… "Amy, he's recovering," I explained to her gently, pulling my hand back but never breaking eye contact. "You know, sooner or later, he'll remember. It happens with all these head-trauma injuries."

                "But I just—he asked me if I was his mother. He looked at me—like he'd never seen me before. Ever! You can't even imagine how hard it to look into the eyes of someone you love and have them look at you back at you with no love!"

                If only you knew, I thought bitterly. I couldn't bear to look at her anymore and dropped my head down into my hands. When I looked up a moment later, I found that Amy was staring off into space.

"I had to leave. I just…how can you love someone and not remember? Maybe I wasn't important enough…" She trailed off, finally breaking down and allowing a fresh tear to break free.

Something got into me. Maybe it was the snow falling around us, or maybe it was just the simple fact that I wanted so badly just to be with her. But on an impulse, the same impulse that had made me kiss her that night in the mine, I took my hand and gently wiped the tear away with my thumb. She turned to look at me, her eyes full of questioning. With her eyes locked on mine, I couldn't do much but stare. And she wasn't breaking our eye contact. Time slowed to a crawl And then suddenly, without a second thought…I leaned in and kissed her.