A.N.:
You know, I had an exam today, on Transport Phenomena, Heat and Mass Transfer. Sounds pompous, no? Once a friend told me that, every time he started studying a book for an exam, he'd think 'I'm not doing it because I have to, I'm reading this book as a way of getting more knowledge', can you believe it?! Well, I have news for you Alexandros! It simply doesn't work when you're reading a 1500-pages book on Heat and Mass Transfer! Ohhh it was awful… I'll never pass it in my life!!
To get over my depression, I thought of writing another couple of chapters (when I should really be studying… Chemical Analysis, that's it) but… awww…. I'm so sad, the last chapter got no reviews… I mean, sure I'm writing this because I love to, and Minako is 'someone' very special to me, but still… I can't help thinking my writing is… well, crap!
Anyway, I'm stubborn ;-)
More Japanese names: Motoki – Andrew; Kunzite – Malachite
Japanese Sailor V manga: there are 3 fantastic volumes, where Minako learns all about her future and goes through crazily insane adventures, before meeting with the other senshi. Summing up, besides fighting crime she goes against the Dark Agency, the first face of the Dark Kingdom. This agency is commanded in the back by Kunzite, but Sailor V goes against Danburite, who appears at first as a masked hero (Ace) who saves her when she's in trouble (Tuxedo style, heart-shaped eyes and all ^_^). Later she finds out about the Silver Millennium, and that Ace is a reincarnation of a Venusian who was in love with her, Adonis; there are hints of a past relationship with Kunzite, and that out of jealousy Adonis turned to the Dark Kingdom. But on the present time Minako is in love with Ace (or so she believes), and she's forced to fight Danburite; she ends up killing him, but before dying he sets a curse on her: an ace of hearts, Sailor Venus will never find love. "You should be happy, this way you'll never be torn between duty and love" he says… In the manga, this episode affects Minako's life greatly. If you can read these books, they are just lovely…
Disclaimer: check the prologue!
January 2003
Road to Utopia
Chapter 2 – don't forget your toothbrush!
Minako ran home in a mad dash, not even stopping to say hi to Motoki, who could only watch her scuttle off. All the way she kept her head down, veiling her eyes with a mass of golden hair, so that no one would see the tear stained face, and wonder what was wrong with that strange little girl, running as if she was going to save the world. And in a way, she really was.
The girl inside the Senshi was so confused and sad, that she somehow seemed to forget that the least of her problems were the tear stains… How she was going to explain her aunt and non-senshi friends the new eye colour, the lighter shade of hair, and the immediate departure from Japan was such a deep mystery that she hadn't even thought about it.
When she got near her two-storey house painted in yellow, her pace slowed down and Minako stopped by the fence to catch her breath and still herself. Her brain, that only a few minutes ago seemed incapable of forming a single coherent thought, was now starting to react, and Minako thanked the Goddess that her aunt was working at this time of day, giving her some precious hours to think and prepare.
When Aino Minako was 10 years old her family moved to England, as her father had gotten an important position as director with a cosmetics company. Her mother, having nothing better to do, dedicated her time to turning her daughter into a child-star, enrolling Minako in every casting or beauty contest she heard about. Minako herself wasn't against the idea of becoming an idol, so she went along with her mother, and eventually both their effort paid off, as Minako got some modelling works.
After turning 13, a white cat with a crescent moon on his forehead (do cats have foreheads?) turned the golden haired girl's life upside down; his name was Artemis, and how had she known that? Well, the darn cat actually talked! That moment would mark the birth of the first sailor suited fighter, Code Name Sailor V the masked avenger, in the person of a reluctant (at least at the beginning) Minako, who claimed that the V stood for Victory, although Artemis knew better… The V stood for Venus, but that was something the brainless girl didn't need to know right then.
After a number of adventures fighting the Dark Kingdom, which she knew as the Dark Agency, and also helping the London police against crime, Sailor V found out about her past life the hardest way, by killing the man she loved, Adonis, a Venusian as herself, in the name of duty.
Learning about the Senshi brought Minako back to Tokyo, driving her parents into absolute shock; they were never able to completely forgive their only daughter, and since then kept no contact with her, apart from some Christmas cards, and occasional phone calls for her birthday. Minako started then a new chapter in her short life and moved with an aunt, who lived at Juuban, one of Tokyo's many populated neighbourhoods.
The relationship between Minako and her aunt never replaced a motherly one, but still the girl felt like she owed the woman; she had after all received in her house a 14 year old niece who had just decided to move back to Japan and leave her parents behind in England. A pretty rash decision, but she accepted it anyway, and for that Minako would always be thankful.
In spite of this gratitude, Minako wouldn't miss her aunt dearly; the constant moving her life had been so far had taught the young woman not to be very attached to people, as she could be forced to leave at any time. But this… this was different. In all those scenarios of departure she had predicted, in none of them she was leaving alone, her Senshi staying behind. Meeting the girls all those years ago had been like finally finding the missing part of her soul, and deep inside her heart Minako had hoped that she would never feel that utter loneliness again. Mind you, in a way Minako would always be alone, as long as she lived focused on her role as Leader, carrying that burden and sacrificing everything for the only thing she held dear, Serenity or Usagi's life. The Senshi of Venus was aware of this, but she also knew that her 'sisters' would always be there, ready to give their life for one another, and hadn't they done it every so often?
But now she was leaving again, and once more alone. Suddenly a smile lit her face, and it seemed to somehow give her strength to enter the house. 'I won't be completely alone this time… How could I forget we rebuilt the Senshi mental link?'
A shaking hand brought the key to the lock, and after pushing a bit the stubborn door slid. Closing it behind her back, Mina breathed a sigh of relief and started climbing the stairs to her room on the first floor. Passing the hanging sign on the door with the words 'Aino Minako' and a small drawing of her winking face, the girl entered the only place where she really felt at home, and thought for a second how it'd be leaving it all behind. 'It won't be hard' she realised, without much surprise.
Minako plopped onto her bed, feeling a bit less confused when surrounded by the sea of orange her bed cover was. Now she remembered where that feeling came from; the sea of Venus always seemed to spark with golden glitters…
The Venusian didn't even bother to conceal her worries from prying green eyes, as she knew Artemis wouldn't be around; the others may not have noticed, but she had felt the little white fur ball's presence in the room, back at Rei's temple. He had surely been there with Luna, but the Moon advisors probably felt this was something they weren't supposed to interfere with. 'And I believe they were right, this decision was ours.' Maybe Usagi had felt it too, the Princess also shared a close bond with her protector.
It wasn't that she used to hide her feelings from Artemis, far from it; after all, he actually was a part of her, of her own body, and without his force she wouldn't have been able to reach the transformation of Super Sailor Venus. But sometimes she'd fall under the habit of hiding her true feelings behind a mask of giddiness even to Artemis, even though she believed he could see through any of her fake or less sincere smiles. Anyway, right now, she didn't feel enough energy left even for the tiniest grin. What a challenge this would be…
As if struck by a revelation, the golden haired girl suddenly jumped from her bed and started moving around in a frenzy, removing clothes from the wardrobe, selecting some of her favourite mangas, starting to pack her belongings. Thoughts were zooming past her mind, 'If I'm really going through this, then I'm starting right now' and new determination seemed to fill her, 'Aino Minako is no longer a child of 14, she's a grown up woman of 20 and most important, a grown up Senshi who has a duty larger than all her silly fears.' As she'd get more confident, the packing would speed up, 'What is this, am I some weakling to feel so down only because I have to leave? I'm stronger than that!' and by now she was actually smiling 'I have a mission to do, and I'm going to succeed even if it kills me'.
Somehow in the middle of all that excitement, she managed to hear the doorbell sounding insistently, as if the person on the other side of the door was running out of patience. Running downstairs, the no longer mature woman was back to the child phase, as she slipped and literally landed on the last step, after several 'ouch' and 'ohhh' were heard.
It was a pained Minako who met Usagi's wide grin. "And you people have the nerve to say I'm the klutz one! You Mina-chan, you take the prize!" The no longer blonde odangoed girl was still laughing when she stepped inside Mina's house, but suddenly all her demeanour changed; as much as she wanted with all her heart that this was only one more visit to chat, gossip and drool over idols on pop magazines, it really wasn't… Saying goodbye was just something Usagi would never be good at.
The serious glint in the bunny's silver-blue eyes was mirrored in Mina's strange golden ones when they got into her room.
"Have you looked at yourself in a mirror this afternoon?" Usagi's head was slightly cocked to the side, focused on Mina's face "You never went on unnoticed, but now… your eyes are golden again."
Usagi was speaking in a way as if she thought Mina hadn't realised that yet, but the golden girl managed to hold back a sarcastic remark. 'Since when did I become sarcastic anyway?' she lightly mused to herself.
"Golden eyes are not common" it was one more of Usagi's completely obvious comments.
"Sure, and we see silver hair every day" was the quick reply 'My, was that sarcasm?'
Usagi fingered some of the metallic tresses with a sheepish smile "Hair dye".
"Contact lens."
They both laughed at the same time, but then reality sunk in again. "Mina, I'm so scared! I may have sounded confident back at the temple, but I'm not… I don't even know if we can pull off something as simple as a different hair or eye colour, let alone build up a new world! And yet I HAVE to be confident, only a few hours ago I gave you all so difficult missions, how can I doubt when I made you all believe?" she brought her head up "Am I making any sense at all?"
Minako sat on the bed, head resting on her knees, "I understand how you feel… we all feel lost, and somehow I believe it's normal. Only a few hours ago we were lost and without a direction, and now we are only lost."
Usa let out a mirthless laugh, "One step at a time, right?" but when her eyes locked with her Senshi's they were brimming with tears. "But why can't you be here with me? Why do I have to send you away when I need you most? You've always given me so much strength, since thousands of years ago…"
The girls held their hands tightly, but Minako said nothing as she felt that Usa needed to pour her heart out.
"You're not the only one who sometimes puts a mask over her feelings…" she ignored the blonde girl's creased brow "I've always been looked at as the ditz, klutz, brainless Princess, good-hearted maybe but hopelessly clueless… I'm not that air-headed, at least not anymore. I see and I remember how devoted you always were, so concerned with that duty of yours that would so often make you forget your own desires… I could see when your eyes were clouded with sadness, maybe even longing, and how you'd hide it under a façade of happiness. You could never stand that someone would worry about you, did you?"
Mina shook her head absent-mindedly, still wondering at her Princess' sensitivity.
"And you know what I'd think every time I'd see you sad, every time any of you would look unhappy?" she had Mina's full attention "I'd think that I didn't deserve friends like you, protectors who would give without a second thought their life for me, their spoiled Princess who shouldn't have nothing of that!" with one hand she silenced Mina's coming outburst "And at night I'd sometimes cry and promise Selene that I'd do all I could to change and become worthy of my friends…" she was now pacing back and forth by the bed "Yet, all I've done since I got here was selfishly complain on how much I'll miss you, without even remembering that it will be a lot harder on you."
"We never imagined you felt like that Usagi… but I'm not the most adequate person to say that you shouldn't be insecure, am I? But what I can say is that you were and always will be our most precious light, so strong yet so fragile that we need to protect at all costs. It never was because of duty, you understand? If we give our lives for you is because we love you and believe in your dreams… but it's up to you to get over those insecurities, it's a part of your own growth" both girls were crying now, and the bunny sat on the floor, her back leaning on the bed.
"It's when I think about all the love we have to give that I'm most sure that we'll make it through all of this." She turned her face to Mina "You may be the Goddess of Love and Beauty Aino Minako, but you have a lonely soul… I know how much our friendship means to you, how important it is being with the girls, and that's what breaks me, seeing you leave to more loneliness, and knowing that I'm the cause. That's why I really came, to ask you to forgive me."
"Usa-chan, I'm leaving because of my dreams and hopes, do you understand the difference?" the silver-haired girl was still sniffing "I'm going of my free will; it's just that some decisions are easier to make than others…" Minako stopped for a few seconds, as if remembering something "We were lost before meeting each other, Ami with her studies, Mako as an orphan, Rei abandoned by her father at the temple, Sailor V fighting crime alone at London… and then we were together, and it was like finding the missing pieces of the puzzle, we were finally complete. It tears my heart to leave, but I'm coming back… We'll be together again soon, in that future we fought so much for."
Usagi smiled between her tears, an echo of Minako's hopes in the new future glimmering in her face. She opened her mouth as to say something else, but seemed to decide against it, to Mina's puzzlement; her eyes zoomed past the golden girl's face, pure indecision in that glance. "What??" Minako was getting exasperated.
"Mina, there's something else I wanted to… I mean…" Mina silently urged her to continue "I know I wasn't supposed to know about this, I mean, if you didn't tell us then you probably didn't want us to know…"
"But what are you talking about??" the golden eyes became darker in irritation.
"Artemis told me and Luna about your Sailor V times… about Ace, Adonis." she cast a cautious glance at Mina, who had just stood up and walked to the window, resting her forehead on the window pane.
"And?"
"I just wanted to tell you that you're the only one who can bring love back to the world… but only if you learn how to do it. Love flows on your veins, it's your own soul, but if you close your heart to it, then how can you give something you don't want for yourself? All you need to do is be the Goddess, and everything will be all right. Adonis' ace of hearts did not determine your future Minako, it's what you believe in that changes that same future. Fly away tomorrow, to give and find love…."
Mina heard the reason behind Usa's words, but that was just something she wasn't able of being reasonable about. Ace's curse would haunt her for ever, but Usagi or the others didn't need to know that. She faced the anxious girl again, "I will."
The flutter of gold in her eyes didn't go unnoticed to Usagi, but she thought it was better to let it pass. "Have you thought about what you're telling your aunt?"
"Not really… but one way or another I'm leaving tomorrow evening."
So sudden! Usagi knew it had to be this way, the sooner she left, less explanations people and friends would ask, but she didn't expect such rush. "And… where to?"
The question caught Mina off guard; she hadn't really thought about it… maybe she should leave it in fate's hands. "Hmmm… that's actually confidential" a wink softened the somewhat rash words, and Usagi played along.
"OK, but just make sure you don't forget your toothbrush… there's nothing as bad as a Love Goddess with bad breath!!" and both girls fell in a fit of giggles. "Have you thought on how to start, or is that also confidential?"
"Well… I guess I'll let my Goddess of Love instincts kick in." 'And what is that supposed to mean?!'
The following hour was spent in light conversation, as if the next day would be the same as ever, going to college (the morning jogging in Usa and Mina's view), meeting at the Arcade to eat a chocolate sundae and play some Sailor V games, getting back home… When would Mina get back home again? 'I can't think about this, it will only distract me from my mission' were Mina's determinate thoughts.
"I'm still wondering on how we'll manage to explain our physical changes… Ami, Michiru and Setsuna will be ok, they've always had their hair with those colours, and Rei is also safe, red highlights are very common. But you, I and Mako are in trouble…" Usagi was back to that afternoon's events, as departing time was coming.
"Green highlights are strange, but I guess Mako can always say she felt like a change." Minako shrugged with a mock smile "But I don't know about you, no one dyes their hair in grey!"
"It's silver, not grey!" replied Usa immediately with an indignant frown "Anyway, I find it a very lovely hair colour, so I don't see why people will think it strange." No sooner had she stopped talking than both girls were laughing soundly.
"That's the attitude, girl!" Minako was still wiping some stray tears.
"Now seriously… it was so much easier in the old days! People knew there was life in the other planets, and were used to seeing a Mercurian with blue hair, or golden-eyed Venusians, whatever… I just can't stand the idea that we'll be looked at as freaks!"
"We won't Usa, not as long as each one of us does their mission. I promise you that." Mina's gaze was pure intense gold "And you'll promise me this: never forget that having doubts don't make your beliefs weaker… Each obstacle and doubt you overcome will only turn you stronger and wiser."
"I promise Mina. Our future is coming..."
They gave each other a strong hug that felt like a goodbye one, and with the now usual tears streaming down their eyes, mouthed a wordless 'See you later'. Usagi's silver tresses trailed off the door, and that would be Mina's last vision of her Princess for a long time.
The talk with Mina's aunt was worst than the Venusian had thought; a feeling of responsibility over her niece had grown inside the older woman, but even more than that she found the girl's behaviour one of extreme ingratitude, and told her so. Mina strangely felt somewhat detached from the whole conversation, and let her aunt talk and accuse her of being ungrateful when she had been received in that house with open arms. Mina didn't even bother to give her opinion of her aunt's hospitality, and waited for the women to get tired of talking, only to go upstairs and pack.
It was like someone had taken control over Minako's life, someone a lot colder who had a mission to fulfil and wouldn't stop at minor details, like her aunt. Mina wasn't sure she liked this new insensitive self, but that was an analysis she'd have to leave for later.
The next day was a frenzy; Artemis arrived at dawn but no words were needed, he had already said his goodbyes and was ready to leave. Mina had been asleep for only two hours, but when the white cat got in she instinctively woke up, and one look at those green irises that said so much was enough. She had never loved her guardian as much as in that moment of silent support.
Together they finished packing all of Mina's belongings. She would be travelling very light, only a worn-out backpack and a basket case, but all her other stuff was going to stay at Mako's. They had talked over the phone the night before, and agreed that the now green-haired girl would keep her few possessions, as she lived all by herself, and would also close Mina's file at the university they both attended.
At around 5 in the afternoon Minako fell exhausted on her bed, one thought hammering in her mind, 'I'm ready'. Gathering her energy, the Senshi Leader activated the mind link, and sent through it a heart-felt goodbye to all her friends. A warm feeling spread through her chest, and Minako knew she had been heard; it was a 'goodbye' but it felt as a 'hello again'… she wouldn't be alone.
None of the passer-byes could avoid stealing a glance at the golden-haired beauty that arrived at the Tokyo International Airport, dressed in sunny yellow with dark glasses concealing her eyes. If someone had followed her, they'd hear how the blonde confidently asked for the first place available in a flight leaving Tokyo, apparently not noticing the dazzled but astonished look the man behind the counter gave her.
Leaning on the window seat of a Boeing 737, Aino Minako's golden eyes absently read the words on the ticket her fingers were holding: 'Destination, Sydney'. As the airplane took off, Usagi's words came back to her mind, 'Have you thought on how to start?'
"I don't know that Usa-chan, but I'm sure it will be big."