Renee Helmer's Little Black Book
(Otherwise Known as a Diary)
14 October
6:38 am
I hate it when I'm up early for no reason whatsoever. I mean, besides the horrible nightmare I was having, there's really no point.
I do hope I never again have a dream in which Snape is reciting a love sonnet to me dressed as a can-can dancer. I could really stand for that not becoming a recurring dream. Why can't I have normal dreams, like going to class in the nuddy-pants?
I can't even get up for Quidditch practice because Gryffindor's using the field this morning.
Damn Gryffindor.
Well, they probably need the practice more than we do. They are Gryffindor, after all.
That's what I can do! I'll go sit in on their practice and pick up battle strategies, teehee!
Besides, Ollie will probably be there!
8:15 am
That was a waste. The most I really got to do was sing my Fred song to... well... Fred. He hates it when I sing the Fred song, and tries to come after me with blunt objects.
You know, the Fred song:
Special Fred,
His mummy dropped him on his head...
George thinks it's funny, then Fred gets all bitter and asks why I don't sing a George song, and I say it's because, I mean, honestly, what rhymes with
Special George,
On Bertie Bott's Beans does he gorge...
Precisely. Not nearly as cute as the Fred song.
But you know that when you talk to the Weasley twins, the Gryffindor Quidditch chicks get all bitchy and think you're flirting with them (as if, they're the Weasley twins!), and come over and are all like, Leave, you Slytherin slime!--or something to that effect.
Honestly, where is the love???
I can tell you one thing, the love definitely wasn't on that Quidditch field this morning. In fact, I haven't seen the love at all for two days!
Where is Ollie, anyway?
12:31 pm
I said something about how I'm French just now during lunch with Crys and Laura, but Laura said just because I have a French name doesn't make me French, and I said I was because I could speak it, and she said to prove it by not speaking english the rest of the day.
Well. Bloody merde.
I'm trying to pretend like I'm mad at her so she won't suspect me of not knowing any French... which I don't.
Hmm... There's got to be something that I know...
Oh! I've got one! That phrase off of Moulin Rouge, in Lady Marmalade... What is it? Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? Close enough, I'll say that to her!
Wow, I've never seen her laugh so hard. I wonder what's so funny?
Crys just called me a lezzer! That was completely uncalled for!
Laura!! STOP LAUGHING!!!
7:31 pm
Here I am, it's after dinner, and I'm trying to decide between two costumes for Terry...
Zidler or Christian?
While it would be very amusing to see Terry dressed up like Zidler, he would be far too sexy in a top hat and coattails for me to pass that up. After all, I will be Satine, and I so look the part...
Except for the black hair...
And the hazel eyes...
And I'm bigger in the bouncy bubbly breasty area....
I don't care! I still look the part! So there!
Now to find a suit for him. Nah, he can get it himself. He's a big boy.
Besides. He's rich.
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