Renee Helmer's Little Black Book
(Otherwise Known as a Diary)


20 October

8:51 am

 Do any other girls have dreams about being a member of the opposite sex and going out with a gay guy, or am I just special?

Ugh, but it's so bad! I can't stop thinking about Terry! And that kiss!!! It's not that I like him or anything, I mean he's even more out-of-my-reach than Ollie, considering.... And I would never be untrue to my Dearest Olliest, but honestly! That Ravenclaw boy doesn't know what he's missing out on!

I hate sitting around waiting for classes to start. It's so boring. Not that I'm really looking forward to hearing Professor Snape go on and on for the next hour. Of course, I could just close my eyes and listen to his voice and pretend different words were being said... because he has a very nice voice... like I've mentioned before...

He just stormed in and went straight to his office. But on his way he turned his face this way and his hair flared so very nicely around it. I love it when he does that. Sure, his hair is greasy and everything, but it works so well for that motion. It is positively pornographic.

What am I saying?!

I am fantasizing about my Potions Master again. This is not healthy. Honestly, it's Snape. I mean, sure, back in the day it would be okay, you know, when he was like 18, maybe even up to 26 or so, but he's like almost forty, I'm sure, and that's just wrong.

Hmmmm.... I wonder if I can find an old yearbook with him in it....

Renee, STOP!!!

You know, I think I forgot to give Venom his medicine this morning. I must be sure to take care of that next time I see him.

Ah, here comes the man of the hour! Why is his hair so sexy today? How can he expect his female students to focus on Potions when he's up there speaking so sexily about... well... whatever he's talking about in that sexy voice, and then we have to ignore the sexy hair too? It's definitely not fair. He makes me want---

((This next part was pasted in later on a piece of parchment))

9:07 am

OhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigosh........

He took up my little black book and went in his office. What if he reads what I wrote? My life will be SO OVER!!!

What am I talking about? It already is over! I'll be serving detention for a month whether he reads it or not!

What if he reads it out loud????

NOOOOOOOO!

He can't read it.... what will he do....?

I'm going to cry....

............................................

I need a hug.

((Back in the book now))

12:31 pm

 Phew. That ended better than I thought it would. He gave it back at the end of class and just said he'd better not see it again. But he was very nice about, he didn't even give me a detention. That's strange...

His eyes are so sexy up-close....

Away, Demon!

Alright, better now.

So I guess that means he didn't read it. That's a relief. I mean, if he had, it surely would have made him angry, right?

But now I feel alone and neglected. Here I am at lunch with no one special to talk to. Oliver and Terry both are at the Ravenclaw table attempting to woo their personal preferences, and I don't know where Crys is, so I am utterly alone.

Well, since I already ate, I guess I could run back to my room for a bit and grab a quick nap.

1:31 pm

 I figured out where Crys was.

She had climbed on top of our dresser in an attempt to escape Venom when he came flying at her head as she walked through the door before going to lunch... and then she never made it to lunch.

I knew I shouldn't have forgotten that bloody medicine....

Anyway, she had resorted to throwing anything and everything at him once he ate her wand, but it only seemed to encourage him more. That will probably cause the poor dear quite a bit of indigestion, but maybe it will at least force him to be more careful of what he eats. Especially things like people.

I don't know how much longer Crys would have lasted if I hadn't come in and forced that potion down his throat. I also don't know why he attacked Crys, I mean, she's certainly not his mummy. And he didn't even try to attack me.

She's not talking to me now, I can't imagine why. Honestly, I saved her life!

11:22 pm

 I feel so... depressed... and... I don't know...

........unloved...........

...neglected...

betrayed

stabbed in the back

ANGRY!!!

..................................

Okay, I've already been crying for an hour on Crys' shoulder (I'm so glad she's talking to me again), I have got to get a hold of myself.

But it's just so hard when you see one of your making out with the guy you would die for, especially after they've said that they have absolutely no interest in said guy.

I HATE HER!!!!!!!!!!

Oh no... I'm starting to cry again... Thank you, Crys, for being here to comfort me even though my sweet baby tried to eat you...

Maybe I'll go back to fantasizing about Snape. I don't think I'll ever find him making out with a Ravenclaw chick in the dark secluded corridors of Hogwarts.

Or maybe I'll just get a sex change and love Terry.

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