I Told You It's Dangerous
Chapter three: Diagon Alley
A/N: First, I will answer my reviewers simply because I want to. Got an objection? Oh, that's all right, I wasn't going to listen to them anyway. So, to S: You've got yourself a deal! To chickens: I reckon they hadn't reviewed because they hadn't had the time to. To Star: I will, thanks for your encouraging words! To birch wood: You really think it's funny? Well I'd hate to stop here when people seem to like my story.
Oh, and I apologise for referring to Sirius as a professor in chapter two in the "The staff room was rather deserted, for the exception of the six transformed professors." - part.
Disclaimer: I still don't own a thing
---
The six transvestites (well, they all wear the opposite sex' clothing at the moment, don't they?) left Hogwarts without anyone noticing. Apart from Dumbledore, of course, whom they had felt obliged to inform about their intentions. The headmaster had, kindly enough, informed Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions (saying that five teachers and a protégé of Hogwarts having a sudden and unintentional sex change was indeed occasional enough). From Hogsmeade they took the floo powder to Leaky Cauldron and proceeded to Diagon Alley.
---
Madam Malkin was rather amused to see their predicament, but her smile soon faded as she realized that she could not find suitable robes from her storage room and would therefore have to take measures and make them herself. She was nearly knocked out as she realized how much ladies' robe fabric it would take to make the robes for Severus alone, as it might have been so, that Severus Snape had been a somewhat tall man, but she was one helluva tall woman, and as ladies' robe fabric for some reason cost a sickle more for a metre than men's did, and as women were usually shorter than most men, their robes were as affordable as men's. And Sirius was not far behind Severus in height.
---
"Hey", Sirius exclaimed as they left Madam Malkin's, "We have the rest of the day off, don't we?"
"You have all the days off, Siri", Minerva pointed out.
"Be that as it may, but couldn't we go to Three Broomsticks for a drink? It's been ages since the I last tasted butterbeer. As a matter of fact, It's been ages I've been able to walk around in my human form without everybody calling the Aurors"
"I won't object", Remus said, "I want some of that as well." After a little pow-wow, they decided for it and set off to Hogsmeade.
---
In The Three Broomsticks, all six scattered around the pub to experience the possibilities. Sirius and Minerva started to have an idle conversation, when Sirius' eyes suddenly focused on someone behind Minerva's back and Widened. Minerva turned around to see Cornelius Fudge enter The Three Broomsticks. When he turned back at Sirius, she was already gone, making a great effort to blend in the crowd around the bar counter and pretending to be talking with Severus. Unfortunately, Fudge didn't seem to much care to sit in a table this time, even as there were several of them free. Instead, he headed towards the counter as well, and Minerva had a feeling he'd seen Sirius.
---
"Sirius!" Severus hissed as the other woman made some room for herself by her side.
"Shh!" Sirius silenced her, "Fudge!" she explained and Severus was able to catch a glimpse of the little Minister of Magic as she glanced around.
"Bound to happen", she muttered under her breath, "Let's just hope he doesn't see us, and if he does, that he won't recognize you. Not that I'd care to be recognized by the old geezer, either." She took a sip of her butterbeer.
Fate, however, either didn't hear their wishes or didn't care. Either way, Fudge did see them, and he did recognize them on some level, as he concentrated on the duo and approached them.
"Hello, ladies", Fudge greeted and both Sirius and Severus slowly and obviously reluctantly turned their heads to face Fudge, who, judging by his idiotic grin, didn't get the clue. That grin was more than enough to make them feel uneasy near him. Fudge studied their appearance from head to toes, which made them even more nervous.
"Do I know you?" he asked, raising an eyebrow
"I- I do not think so", Severus hurried to reply
"But we sure do know who you are", Sirius said, and fudge smiled even wider 'Uh-oh', Severus though, 'a BIG mistake there, Siri.' She risked a sideways glance, as She was sure half of the pub were staring at them. To her relief only Minerva, Hannah and Remus seemed to be paying them any attention. She formed eye contact and formed the word: "Help" with her lips. They smiled and Minerva shook his head slightly. It would seem that they were on their own, then. Severus turned back to Fudge and Sirius. It looked like he was trying to hit on them. As sickening the thought was to Severus, she tried ever so hard not to scowl or express any of the other ones of the patented expressions of Severus Snape, as she was too afraid to be recognized. It was particularly hard with Fudge trying to talk the two of them into bed. BOTH of them, for Merlin's sake!
---
Sirius saw how hard Severus tried not to express how disgusted she was. Then again, so was Sirius.
"So, what might your names be?" Fudge asked, flashing a smile he obviously thought was sexy.
"Se - oof" Severus paused as Sirius elbowed her in the ribs, "I mean, Serena, um, Sn.iper. Yes, that's it, Serena Sniper." She said with an indifferent face. Fudge turned his attention to Sirius.
"Uh, Sinna Blanc", she said.
"Well, pleasure to meet you two fine ladies. I've always preferred tall women", Fudge said, failing to notice the twitching in the corners of the tall ladies' eyes. Sirius was beginning to consider hexing Fudge to next Saturday, when Remus and the crew ¨decided they'd had enough fun on their expense, and came to help, Remus holding on to Minerva's arm, grinning almost maliciously, with Hannah and Minerva by their side. Samantha tapped Sirius on the shoulder.
"Sinna, if you and Serena are quite done, I reckon we should get back. After all, if we're going to catch that muggle movie, we'd bette go change clothes." With that, he grabbed her arm as Hannah dragged Severus with him. Once they'd got out, Sirius and Severus turned to thank their saviours.
"You guys owe us one", Remus said.
"No, we don't", Severus obliged, "If you came earlier, then maybe."
"What do you mean, earlier?" Hannah asked, still holding on to her arm
"Grabbed my ass, that bastard did", Severus said, murkily.
"Mine too", Sirius said, "We own you nothing." She concluded. The four others nodded and all six of them stared to make their way back to Hogwarts.
---
There was the third chapter. It's not quite as long as the previous two, but I believe there is enough for one chapter. And still, the periods question remains, as well as how would you like them to change back to normal. IF you want them to change back at all, that is. Should they begin to change inside, too? Like Sev, Siri and Remmie starting to like men and stuff.
Chapter three: Diagon Alley
A/N: First, I will answer my reviewers simply because I want to. Got an objection? Oh, that's all right, I wasn't going to listen to them anyway. So, to S: You've got yourself a deal! To chickens: I reckon they hadn't reviewed because they hadn't had the time to. To Star: I will, thanks for your encouraging words! To birch wood: You really think it's funny? Well I'd hate to stop here when people seem to like my story.
Oh, and I apologise for referring to Sirius as a professor in chapter two in the "The staff room was rather deserted, for the exception of the six transformed professors." - part.
Disclaimer: I still don't own a thing
---
The six transvestites (well, they all wear the opposite sex' clothing at the moment, don't they?) left Hogwarts without anyone noticing. Apart from Dumbledore, of course, whom they had felt obliged to inform about their intentions. The headmaster had, kindly enough, informed Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions (saying that five teachers and a protégé of Hogwarts having a sudden and unintentional sex change was indeed occasional enough). From Hogsmeade they took the floo powder to Leaky Cauldron and proceeded to Diagon Alley.
---
Madam Malkin was rather amused to see their predicament, but her smile soon faded as she realized that she could not find suitable robes from her storage room and would therefore have to take measures and make them herself. She was nearly knocked out as she realized how much ladies' robe fabric it would take to make the robes for Severus alone, as it might have been so, that Severus Snape had been a somewhat tall man, but she was one helluva tall woman, and as ladies' robe fabric for some reason cost a sickle more for a metre than men's did, and as women were usually shorter than most men, their robes were as affordable as men's. And Sirius was not far behind Severus in height.
---
"Hey", Sirius exclaimed as they left Madam Malkin's, "We have the rest of the day off, don't we?"
"You have all the days off, Siri", Minerva pointed out.
"Be that as it may, but couldn't we go to Three Broomsticks for a drink? It's been ages since the I last tasted butterbeer. As a matter of fact, It's been ages I've been able to walk around in my human form without everybody calling the Aurors"
"I won't object", Remus said, "I want some of that as well." After a little pow-wow, they decided for it and set off to Hogsmeade.
---
In The Three Broomsticks, all six scattered around the pub to experience the possibilities. Sirius and Minerva started to have an idle conversation, when Sirius' eyes suddenly focused on someone behind Minerva's back and Widened. Minerva turned around to see Cornelius Fudge enter The Three Broomsticks. When he turned back at Sirius, she was already gone, making a great effort to blend in the crowd around the bar counter and pretending to be talking with Severus. Unfortunately, Fudge didn't seem to much care to sit in a table this time, even as there were several of them free. Instead, he headed towards the counter as well, and Minerva had a feeling he'd seen Sirius.
---
"Sirius!" Severus hissed as the other woman made some room for herself by her side.
"Shh!" Sirius silenced her, "Fudge!" she explained and Severus was able to catch a glimpse of the little Minister of Magic as she glanced around.
"Bound to happen", she muttered under her breath, "Let's just hope he doesn't see us, and if he does, that he won't recognize you. Not that I'd care to be recognized by the old geezer, either." She took a sip of her butterbeer.
Fate, however, either didn't hear their wishes or didn't care. Either way, Fudge did see them, and he did recognize them on some level, as he concentrated on the duo and approached them.
"Hello, ladies", Fudge greeted and both Sirius and Severus slowly and obviously reluctantly turned their heads to face Fudge, who, judging by his idiotic grin, didn't get the clue. That grin was more than enough to make them feel uneasy near him. Fudge studied their appearance from head to toes, which made them even more nervous.
"Do I know you?" he asked, raising an eyebrow
"I- I do not think so", Severus hurried to reply
"But we sure do know who you are", Sirius said, and fudge smiled even wider 'Uh-oh', Severus though, 'a BIG mistake there, Siri.' She risked a sideways glance, as She was sure half of the pub were staring at them. To her relief only Minerva, Hannah and Remus seemed to be paying them any attention. She formed eye contact and formed the word: "Help" with her lips. They smiled and Minerva shook his head slightly. It would seem that they were on their own, then. Severus turned back to Fudge and Sirius. It looked like he was trying to hit on them. As sickening the thought was to Severus, she tried ever so hard not to scowl or express any of the other ones of the patented expressions of Severus Snape, as she was too afraid to be recognized. It was particularly hard with Fudge trying to talk the two of them into bed. BOTH of them, for Merlin's sake!
---
Sirius saw how hard Severus tried not to express how disgusted she was. Then again, so was Sirius.
"So, what might your names be?" Fudge asked, flashing a smile he obviously thought was sexy.
"Se - oof" Severus paused as Sirius elbowed her in the ribs, "I mean, Serena, um, Sn.iper. Yes, that's it, Serena Sniper." She said with an indifferent face. Fudge turned his attention to Sirius.
"Uh, Sinna Blanc", she said.
"Well, pleasure to meet you two fine ladies. I've always preferred tall women", Fudge said, failing to notice the twitching in the corners of the tall ladies' eyes. Sirius was beginning to consider hexing Fudge to next Saturday, when Remus and the crew ¨decided they'd had enough fun on their expense, and came to help, Remus holding on to Minerva's arm, grinning almost maliciously, with Hannah and Minerva by their side. Samantha tapped Sirius on the shoulder.
"Sinna, if you and Serena are quite done, I reckon we should get back. After all, if we're going to catch that muggle movie, we'd bette go change clothes." With that, he grabbed her arm as Hannah dragged Severus with him. Once they'd got out, Sirius and Severus turned to thank their saviours.
"You guys owe us one", Remus said.
"No, we don't", Severus obliged, "If you came earlier, then maybe."
"What do you mean, earlier?" Hannah asked, still holding on to her arm
"Grabbed my ass, that bastard did", Severus said, murkily.
"Mine too", Sirius said, "We own you nothing." She concluded. The four others nodded and all six of them stared to make their way back to Hogwarts.
---
There was the third chapter. It's not quite as long as the previous two, but I believe there is enough for one chapter. And still, the periods question remains, as well as how would you like them to change back to normal. IF you want them to change back at all, that is. Should they begin to change inside, too? Like Sev, Siri and Remmie starting to like men and stuff.