John slept for the rest of that day, not stirring again until the next morning. Meg sat vigil over him all that time, dozing when she could no longer help herself. She periodically checked his wound and the bandage, taking exquisite care not to disturb his rest. He was still feverish, but his wound showed signs of improvement, though she considered that only she would be able to detect those small changes, watching over him through the long hours making her ever more the expert regarding all things John Lee.
She found herself relaxed and happy, in spite of scant sleep when she saw John's eyes open and regard her fondly. She roused herself and began the tasks of caring for him.
Meg changed dressings and applied more antibiotics. John was quiet for much of the ordeal of the dressing change, Meg realized he was doing his best to exhibit a stoic front to her, in spite of the amount of pain the ritual caused.
Meg wanted to tell him not to squander his precious energy on hiding discomfort from her, but she respected his pride. Once again she regretted the lack of effective painkillers on hand. She gave him his antibiotics and more ibuprofen, watching him carefully as he drank down the liquids
his body so needed.
She wondered at the stamina it had taken to reach her at all. On the run for so long, exhaustion certainly factored into his present condition. His immune system had suffered the privations of of the last few months, aided and abetted by inadequate food, a lack of restorative rest and the stress of the situation. He'd simply had nothing left to fight with when he'd been shot--in spite of the Buddhist brothers' excellent care.
The flight had presented its own problems. No doubt dehydration had begun with blood loss.
If John had been unconscious for any length of time even under the brothers' care, his fluid intake may have already been inadequate. Pressurized cabins were notorious for adding to dehydration and John, from the sounds of things, had soon been in no condition to take advantage of the
fluids offered on he fifteen hour flight.
He had been right to doubt that he might survive the trip from China, the dominoes of his physical condition had already begun to fall before he had ever boarded the plane.
She brought in fluids, overseeing his taking of medication that was by now overdue. Checking his temperature and pulse, she then repaired to her small kitchen and warmed up food for him to eat.
She balanced the dishes on the tray, as before. John insisted on trying to feed himself, balancing the spoon for the congee awkwardly in his left hand. There was no movement from his right.
"John, I've been wanting to ask you--" Meg began after John had had a chance to nearly finish the soup in the bowl. She paused, as though not sure if she should continue.
"What do you wish to know?" he asked quietly.
"Why did it take six months for you to get your family out of China? And just what were the circumstances of your being shot? Liu Shen gave me the Reader's Digest condensed version of the latter and said next to nothing about the former."
John took in a final spoonful of soup, seeming to consider his answer before speaking.
"It was and is a difficult situation to leave China. There were preparations necessary that required careful planning, strategy and execution.
"And also, you see, Mr. Wei had a good many interests in China, and there were others in situations such as my own. My family was not the only one that required escape.
"Towards that end, I and a select few like myself set about carefully liberating some of Mr. Wei's wealth, hidden in secret bank accounts, some in China, some not. His illegal dealings financed freedom for nearly one hundred people. I tried to send Lee Ma and Liu Shen ahead without me, but they would not leave unless I did---"
"Because there was no guarantee that if they left you behind, you would ever leave. Right John?" Meg interrupted, her voice low and quiet. She had surprised even herself with the revelation, but knew it to be true, her gut wrenching with the knowledge.
John ducked his head, the action confirming to her that she had guessed rightly. "My original intention was to get Lee Ma and Liu Shen away. I did not consider that I had a future anywhere, so it did not matter what happened to me, if I never left China, I was resigned to that fate. If I ended up dead or imprisoned for what I was doing, it was no less than I deserved for how I had spent over twenty years of my life. The many deaths that I was responsible for in those years.
"Their intractability in not leaving unless I did, made me adjust my thinking. As did the fact that I was missing you. More and more each day. So we resigned ourselves to being among the last to leave.
"The deportation of Wei's people here made things more complicated, dangerous. We were often on the move in those months avoiding members of Wei's gang who realized what we were doing and tried to stop us. A day here, a week there. But it was good and necessary work, and I took pride in my part of it. That was a novel experience, taking pride in doing something. Having a positive impact on people's lives, not taking them. I thought of you often, and how you'd be proud of me continuing the work I had started with Zedkov's son. I hoped to channel much of that money that to finance the work of the monks, to help others to escape.
"My mother and sister were stoic, putting up with many privations. Always I tried to convince them to await me in a safe place, but they would not hear of it, were intent on sharing whatever hardship was necessary to stay together. They were very brave.
"Finally, almost a week ago, the remnants of Wei's gang found me. I was concluding the final phase of the business, transferring the last of Wei's assets to offshore bank accounts. One of them had been in Wei's private circle. He tried to exact revenge for my killing his master. I was able to neutralize him and his compatriot. But I was wounded in the process. The rest I think you know. We returned to Canton, to the monks there. They cared for me and my family for two days, then we finally made our escape.
"It had been my intention to establish Lee Ma and Liu Shen here first, then come to you. When I fell so ill on the plane coming over, Liu Shen formulated the plan to come to you immediately. She pumped me for information --I realize now--about where you lived and how to get to you. At the time I saw it as her way to comfort me, neither of us were sure I was going to live to see the US and you at that point. The rest you do know."
Meg, during the course of his explanation, had moved from the chair to sitting on the edge of the mattress. As he concluded the tale, Meg had put her arms around him, offering him solace, empathy evident in her eyes.
He returned the embrace, thankful once more that he had survived to reach her. Counting every privation endured worth it to be here and in her arms.
"I was right to be worried for six months straight. You were never out of my thoughts. I could sense, I swear it, that something was wrong, but having no information, no word from you..."
"It was for everyone's safety, yours included. In my mind I wrote you long letters about how we were and what I was doing and that I wanted to see you again. But I could not risk putting them down on paper. I dared not even try to get a message to you through the brothers."
Meg made a gentle shushing noise, touching his face, "It's all right. Messages can be intercepted. And you had your family to protect. What I went through was nothing--NOTHING compared to what you and your family were going through. I'm just so happy that you all made it out alive, and that you came to me first. That you didn't die."
Meg's eyes glistened with unshed tears, her expression stricken. It was John's turn to comfort, and he did so lovingly, "Mo men tai," he said softly in Cantonese, "mo men tai." It's all right.
Meg sat with John until, once again, he fell asleep. The effort of relating the story of the last six months of his and his family's life had seemed to drain away his fragile energy, but also seemed ti bring a measure of peace. He rested more comfortably than before, while Meg uneasily contemplated what he had said, and had grown restless.
He had gone back to China, never figuring to return. To do the noble thing she had watched him
attempt once before, which had prompted her to be at his side as he took on Terence Wei.
She was more grateful than ever for the miracle of his return.
Liu Shen and Lee Ma stirred not long after John had fallen back to sleep. They moved through the apartment, looking a bit sheepish, as though embarrassed at how long they had slept.
Meg, speaking softly so as not to disturb the sleeping John, assured them that their long sleep
had been just the remedy for a long journey. And for the months of stress previously, she thought to herself, had it been her, she would have slept for a week.
Liu Shen and her mother listened carefully to Meg's news of John's progress, smiles replacing
frown lines as she noted every small improvement. Liu Shen happily translated for her mother, who in turn expressed her relief in giving Meg a hug, murmuring her thanks in Cantonese.
Meg was entranced by John's family, grateful that she had had a small part in their safe escape, happy to finally come to know the people that she had only heard about from a taciturn John all those months ago.
In spite of the life they had been forced to lead for the last two decades, both women possessed a liveliness and optimism that Meg found herself envying. She marveled at their strength and bravery.
She wasn't feeling very brave herself or very strong. She hoped that by association she might learn how to be both again.
end chapter 3
She found herself relaxed and happy, in spite of scant sleep when she saw John's eyes open and regard her fondly. She roused herself and began the tasks of caring for him.
Meg changed dressings and applied more antibiotics. John was quiet for much of the ordeal of the dressing change, Meg realized he was doing his best to exhibit a stoic front to her, in spite of the amount of pain the ritual caused.
Meg wanted to tell him not to squander his precious energy on hiding discomfort from her, but she respected his pride. Once again she regretted the lack of effective painkillers on hand. She gave him his antibiotics and more ibuprofen, watching him carefully as he drank down the liquids
his body so needed.
She wondered at the stamina it had taken to reach her at all. On the run for so long, exhaustion certainly factored into his present condition. His immune system had suffered the privations of of the last few months, aided and abetted by inadequate food, a lack of restorative rest and the stress of the situation. He'd simply had nothing left to fight with when he'd been shot--in spite of the Buddhist brothers' excellent care.
The flight had presented its own problems. No doubt dehydration had begun with blood loss.
If John had been unconscious for any length of time even under the brothers' care, his fluid intake may have already been inadequate. Pressurized cabins were notorious for adding to dehydration and John, from the sounds of things, had soon been in no condition to take advantage of the
fluids offered on he fifteen hour flight.
He had been right to doubt that he might survive the trip from China, the dominoes of his physical condition had already begun to fall before he had ever boarded the plane.
She brought in fluids, overseeing his taking of medication that was by now overdue. Checking his temperature and pulse, she then repaired to her small kitchen and warmed up food for him to eat.
She balanced the dishes on the tray, as before. John insisted on trying to feed himself, balancing the spoon for the congee awkwardly in his left hand. There was no movement from his right.
"John, I've been wanting to ask you--" Meg began after John had had a chance to nearly finish the soup in the bowl. She paused, as though not sure if she should continue.
"What do you wish to know?" he asked quietly.
"Why did it take six months for you to get your family out of China? And just what were the circumstances of your being shot? Liu Shen gave me the Reader's Digest condensed version of the latter and said next to nothing about the former."
John took in a final spoonful of soup, seeming to consider his answer before speaking.
"It was and is a difficult situation to leave China. There were preparations necessary that required careful planning, strategy and execution.
"And also, you see, Mr. Wei had a good many interests in China, and there were others in situations such as my own. My family was not the only one that required escape.
"Towards that end, I and a select few like myself set about carefully liberating some of Mr. Wei's wealth, hidden in secret bank accounts, some in China, some not. His illegal dealings financed freedom for nearly one hundred people. I tried to send Lee Ma and Liu Shen ahead without me, but they would not leave unless I did---"
"Because there was no guarantee that if they left you behind, you would ever leave. Right John?" Meg interrupted, her voice low and quiet. She had surprised even herself with the revelation, but knew it to be true, her gut wrenching with the knowledge.
John ducked his head, the action confirming to her that she had guessed rightly. "My original intention was to get Lee Ma and Liu Shen away. I did not consider that I had a future anywhere, so it did not matter what happened to me, if I never left China, I was resigned to that fate. If I ended up dead or imprisoned for what I was doing, it was no less than I deserved for how I had spent over twenty years of my life. The many deaths that I was responsible for in those years.
"Their intractability in not leaving unless I did, made me adjust my thinking. As did the fact that I was missing you. More and more each day. So we resigned ourselves to being among the last to leave.
"The deportation of Wei's people here made things more complicated, dangerous. We were often on the move in those months avoiding members of Wei's gang who realized what we were doing and tried to stop us. A day here, a week there. But it was good and necessary work, and I took pride in my part of it. That was a novel experience, taking pride in doing something. Having a positive impact on people's lives, not taking them. I thought of you often, and how you'd be proud of me continuing the work I had started with Zedkov's son. I hoped to channel much of that money that to finance the work of the monks, to help others to escape.
"My mother and sister were stoic, putting up with many privations. Always I tried to convince them to await me in a safe place, but they would not hear of it, were intent on sharing whatever hardship was necessary to stay together. They were very brave.
"Finally, almost a week ago, the remnants of Wei's gang found me. I was concluding the final phase of the business, transferring the last of Wei's assets to offshore bank accounts. One of them had been in Wei's private circle. He tried to exact revenge for my killing his master. I was able to neutralize him and his compatriot. But I was wounded in the process. The rest I think you know. We returned to Canton, to the monks there. They cared for me and my family for two days, then we finally made our escape.
"It had been my intention to establish Lee Ma and Liu Shen here first, then come to you. When I fell so ill on the plane coming over, Liu Shen formulated the plan to come to you immediately. She pumped me for information --I realize now--about where you lived and how to get to you. At the time I saw it as her way to comfort me, neither of us were sure I was going to live to see the US and you at that point. The rest you do know."
Meg, during the course of his explanation, had moved from the chair to sitting on the edge of the mattress. As he concluded the tale, Meg had put her arms around him, offering him solace, empathy evident in her eyes.
He returned the embrace, thankful once more that he had survived to reach her. Counting every privation endured worth it to be here and in her arms.
"I was right to be worried for six months straight. You were never out of my thoughts. I could sense, I swear it, that something was wrong, but having no information, no word from you..."
"It was for everyone's safety, yours included. In my mind I wrote you long letters about how we were and what I was doing and that I wanted to see you again. But I could not risk putting them down on paper. I dared not even try to get a message to you through the brothers."
Meg made a gentle shushing noise, touching his face, "It's all right. Messages can be intercepted. And you had your family to protect. What I went through was nothing--NOTHING compared to what you and your family were going through. I'm just so happy that you all made it out alive, and that you came to me first. That you didn't die."
Meg's eyes glistened with unshed tears, her expression stricken. It was John's turn to comfort, and he did so lovingly, "Mo men tai," he said softly in Cantonese, "mo men tai." It's all right.
Meg sat with John until, once again, he fell asleep. The effort of relating the story of the last six months of his and his family's life had seemed to drain away his fragile energy, but also seemed ti bring a measure of peace. He rested more comfortably than before, while Meg uneasily contemplated what he had said, and had grown restless.
He had gone back to China, never figuring to return. To do the noble thing she had watched him
attempt once before, which had prompted her to be at his side as he took on Terence Wei.
She was more grateful than ever for the miracle of his return.
Liu Shen and Lee Ma stirred not long after John had fallen back to sleep. They moved through the apartment, looking a bit sheepish, as though embarrassed at how long they had slept.
Meg, speaking softly so as not to disturb the sleeping John, assured them that their long sleep
had been just the remedy for a long journey. And for the months of stress previously, she thought to herself, had it been her, she would have slept for a week.
Liu Shen and her mother listened carefully to Meg's news of John's progress, smiles replacing
frown lines as she noted every small improvement. Liu Shen happily translated for her mother, who in turn expressed her relief in giving Meg a hug, murmuring her thanks in Cantonese.
Meg was entranced by John's family, grateful that she had had a small part in their safe escape, happy to finally come to know the people that she had only heard about from a taciturn John all those months ago.
In spite of the life they had been forced to lead for the last two decades, both women possessed a liveliness and optimism that Meg found herself envying. She marveled at their strength and bravery.
She wasn't feeling very brave herself or very strong. She hoped that by association she might learn how to be both again.
end chapter 3