Chapter Four
Offering
Wilhelmina walked into the small Altar, hands clasped lightly on the basket she held. The concentration it took to keep the serene expression on her face was almost enough to distract her from the sick fear inside. She didn't feel ready for this, but she was never going to be any more ready. For months she'd studied, she'd practiced, she'd learned every bit of Craft that Phoebe could teach her, soaking up the knowledge like a thirsty plant in springtime.
And she was still terrified.
She'd lived for years with the fear of being broken, but this was the first time the danger had come from within herself. If she failed the Offering, she'd come out with only her birthright Purple Dusk or not come out at all - and she didn't know if she was strong enough. But she'd realized weeks ago that she would never know for sure; the time since had been spent mustering up the courage to come anyway. She hoped she could hold on to it long enough.
At the door to the inner Altar, she stopped and bowed to the Priestess who guarded it, handing her the basket she carried. It was customary to give the Priestess some consideration before the Offering; in this poor corner of the Territory, it had to be preserves from the garden she and Delia had tended all summer. She found she liked them better than the valuable bauble that would have been given to a Priestess in Chaillot; this at least represented her own efforts.
Besides, from the faint gleam in the Priestess' eyes at the unmistakable scent of spice-apples, it would be much more appreciated than some ornamental trinket.
The Priestess gave her an appreciative smile before smoothing her face into the calm mask the Offering required. "I will be in the outer sanctuary tonight and tomorrow. After the Offering, I will leave water to refresh you and bread if you hunger. Take whatever time you need; if I have not seen you by sunset tomorrow, I will come to find you."
Sunset to sunrise, and a day to adjust to any...changes...the Offering might cause. "Thank you."
"May the Darkness shelter you." The Priestess opened the door, murmured a soft blessing, and then gestured her into the inner Altar.
Leaving Wilhelmina alone with herself and the Darkness.
***************************
Without seeing it, she knew when the sun came up and the Offering ended. She stared down in relief and wonder at the Sapphire Jewels cupped in her hands, not quite believing that she'd not only survived but descended the full three ranks from her Birthright as well. She'd never been so exhausted, but the dark influx of power rushing through her was so strong she felt she could fly.
A touch of Craft set the Sapphires spinning in front of her, witchlight glittering off their blue facets. She watched them for a moment with a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth, until something distracted her, pulling at her consciousness. On instinct, she called in the Sapphire Jaenelle had given her. It flickered in her hands, growing dimmer and more transparent with every moment. She could feel her tenuous bond with the Jewel start to fade, and used the last of it to reach down to the heart of the Jewel, down where it shared some of Jaenelle's essence. The bond faded out completely as she left a message. *I do love you. I miss you. I'm going to find you.*
Kaeleer, the Jewel whispered in her mind one last time, and this time Wilhelmina actually laughed.
"I _know_ that!"
The Sapphire vanished, and Wilhelmina's Jewels fell into her lap. She vanished them carefully and climbed to her feet, stiff from spending - how long? - kneeling on the stone floor. She could have cheerfully slept for a week, but she wanted to let the Priestess know she was all right, so she could pass it on to Delia and Phoebe.
But she didn't have to. The Queen-in-waiting was sitting outside the sanctuary door, with a tray that held a prodigious breakfast for Wilhelmina and a slightly more demure one for Delia.
"_Thank_ you!" She plopped down next to her friend and downed a breakfast roll in two bites. It wasn't ladylike. She didn't care.
"So what happened?" Delia was practically vibrating with curiosity, but was (barely) too well-mannered to use a psychic probe.
Mouth full, Wilhelmina called in the larger Sapphire and displayed it on an open palm. Delia squeaked with excitement before remembering she was in an Altar (and Wilhelmina didn't really _want_ to know how the young Queen had wheedled her way in here). "You did it! I'm so glad for you - do you know what you're going to do?"
"Traveling, it looks like. I've got family in Kaeleer I need to find."
Delia looked slightly downcast at the news that she would be leaving, but there was still suppressed excitement sparkling all around her. "I hate to see you go, but Kaeleer is probably the safest place for you. For anyone. Gran says something's coming. Her Webs won't tell her much, but it's going to be dangerous - and if we can survive it, it'll set my Territory free." Her gray eyes glittered, and Wilhelmina felt a faint touch of envy of Dena Nehele's people, living under a Queen who would not betray them.
"You'll do fine." Joy and pain, rage and celebration - she'd heard the words somewhere before, and somehow they tied into the fate of the Queen of Dena Nehele. Whatever was coming, her friend would survive it. And so would she. She was often afraid - probably always would be, on some level - but she would never be helpless again.
Wilhelmina walked into the small Altar, hands clasped lightly on the basket she held. The concentration it took to keep the serene expression on her face was almost enough to distract her from the sick fear inside. She didn't feel ready for this, but she was never going to be any more ready. For months she'd studied, she'd practiced, she'd learned every bit of Craft that Phoebe could teach her, soaking up the knowledge like a thirsty plant in springtime.
And she was still terrified.
She'd lived for years with the fear of being broken, but this was the first time the danger had come from within herself. If she failed the Offering, she'd come out with only her birthright Purple Dusk or not come out at all - and she didn't know if she was strong enough. But she'd realized weeks ago that she would never know for sure; the time since had been spent mustering up the courage to come anyway. She hoped she could hold on to it long enough.
At the door to the inner Altar, she stopped and bowed to the Priestess who guarded it, handing her the basket she carried. It was customary to give the Priestess some consideration before the Offering; in this poor corner of the Territory, it had to be preserves from the garden she and Delia had tended all summer. She found she liked them better than the valuable bauble that would have been given to a Priestess in Chaillot; this at least represented her own efforts.
Besides, from the faint gleam in the Priestess' eyes at the unmistakable scent of spice-apples, it would be much more appreciated than some ornamental trinket.
The Priestess gave her an appreciative smile before smoothing her face into the calm mask the Offering required. "I will be in the outer sanctuary tonight and tomorrow. After the Offering, I will leave water to refresh you and bread if you hunger. Take whatever time you need; if I have not seen you by sunset tomorrow, I will come to find you."
Sunset to sunrise, and a day to adjust to any...changes...the Offering might cause. "Thank you."
"May the Darkness shelter you." The Priestess opened the door, murmured a soft blessing, and then gestured her into the inner Altar.
Leaving Wilhelmina alone with herself and the Darkness.
***************************
Without seeing it, she knew when the sun came up and the Offering ended. She stared down in relief and wonder at the Sapphire Jewels cupped in her hands, not quite believing that she'd not only survived but descended the full three ranks from her Birthright as well. She'd never been so exhausted, but the dark influx of power rushing through her was so strong she felt she could fly.
A touch of Craft set the Sapphires spinning in front of her, witchlight glittering off their blue facets. She watched them for a moment with a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth, until something distracted her, pulling at her consciousness. On instinct, she called in the Sapphire Jaenelle had given her. It flickered in her hands, growing dimmer and more transparent with every moment. She could feel her tenuous bond with the Jewel start to fade, and used the last of it to reach down to the heart of the Jewel, down where it shared some of Jaenelle's essence. The bond faded out completely as she left a message. *I do love you. I miss you. I'm going to find you.*
Kaeleer, the Jewel whispered in her mind one last time, and this time Wilhelmina actually laughed.
"I _know_ that!"
The Sapphire vanished, and Wilhelmina's Jewels fell into her lap. She vanished them carefully and climbed to her feet, stiff from spending - how long? - kneeling on the stone floor. She could have cheerfully slept for a week, but she wanted to let the Priestess know she was all right, so she could pass it on to Delia and Phoebe.
But she didn't have to. The Queen-in-waiting was sitting outside the sanctuary door, with a tray that held a prodigious breakfast for Wilhelmina and a slightly more demure one for Delia.
"_Thank_ you!" She plopped down next to her friend and downed a breakfast roll in two bites. It wasn't ladylike. She didn't care.
"So what happened?" Delia was practically vibrating with curiosity, but was (barely) too well-mannered to use a psychic probe.
Mouth full, Wilhelmina called in the larger Sapphire and displayed it on an open palm. Delia squeaked with excitement before remembering she was in an Altar (and Wilhelmina didn't really _want_ to know how the young Queen had wheedled her way in here). "You did it! I'm so glad for you - do you know what you're going to do?"
"Traveling, it looks like. I've got family in Kaeleer I need to find."
Delia looked slightly downcast at the news that she would be leaving, but there was still suppressed excitement sparkling all around her. "I hate to see you go, but Kaeleer is probably the safest place for you. For anyone. Gran says something's coming. Her Webs won't tell her much, but it's going to be dangerous - and if we can survive it, it'll set my Territory free." Her gray eyes glittered, and Wilhelmina felt a faint touch of envy of Dena Nehele's people, living under a Queen who would not betray them.
"You'll do fine." Joy and pain, rage and celebration - she'd heard the words somewhere before, and somehow they tied into the fate of the Queen of Dena Nehele. Whatever was coming, her friend would survive it. And so would she. She was often afraid - probably always would be, on some level - but she would never be helpless again.