Disclaimer: I do not claim the character herein. The character is from an anime series entitled Yuyu Hakusho owned by Yoshihiro Togashi.

Hiei's Doubt

I never allowed myself to be drawn out anymore. I am afraid to love and be loved. To love because I might end up hurting the person I will love and to be loved because I am afraid that it may not last. I am afraid to get hurt. emotionally. I'm not used to these kinds of things. I'd rather go out in physical battle than the one that involves the heart. I have seen and felt how it, or even the lack of it can hurt. This is probably selfishness.my famous abhorrent nature. I just don't want to get caught in the web of deceit and lies that many relationships nowadays live with. I am afraid that I may be left behind or that I may leave someone behind. I'm afraid that I may not live up to every expectation they claim of me. I may be paranoid or something. I'd rather risk my life than my heart. I wish I could be brave to face this certain fear of mine. But I guess I am not yet ready for life and love despite the pain and agony I have experienced. Perhaps someday, someone will make me brave. I must wait until then.