For the purposes of this story, Rivendell is about one mile from the Misty
Mountains. Sorry if that's a little off, but just to warn everyone that is
the distance I am using. Also, Estel is supposed to be about seven or eight
years old.
To: Kawaii Blue Bear: Yes, trouble and lots of sap. He he, the way you said "stay" it's like Estel is a dog. Me: Estel! Roll over! Estel: Woof, woof!
To: Azaelia: Glad you like it. For more, scroll down. . .
To: Lina Sky: Hey, I know you! You reviewed Carrie's story, didn't you? You strangled her characters! Cool. . .anyway, yes bad things always seem to happen to Estel, but he gets the best sap stories, so that evens it out.
To: Anonymous reviewer: Thanks and for more scroll. . .
To: Stasia: Thanks and thanks!! Thanks about Estel's mind, as well, Freud studies are not helpful for children's minds (Freud was perverted, he connected everything to sex!)
To: da Twickster: Elflings really can be terrible. Hmm, maybe they ought to learn that it is *wrong* to be so mean to Estel.
To: Rae Maxwell: Thanks!
"He got the urge for going
And I had to let him go
He got the urge for going
When the meadow grass was turning brown
Summertime was falling down and winter
Was closing in"
~Joni Mitchell, Urge for Going
*****
Estel sat on his bed, looking at the window. "Are you going to stay, after all? Are you going to be a sissy wuss like the others say you are?" asked the voice in his head.
"Of course not!" Estel replied. "I am going to leave, I am going to go to Mirkwood!" He opened the window and was about to crawl through it when he heard noises in the hallway outside. He paused and listened to them.
"No, Elladan," Elrohir was saying, "I am only going out to see if Anor is all right." Anor, Estel thought, The sun? Elrohir was going to see if the sun was all right? Then he remembered that Anor was a horse, one that was with child.
"I will come with you," Elladan volunteered. The two passed out of Estel's hearing range, and he breathed a sigh of relief. "Elrohir. . ." he paused. Elrohir turned to Elladan with a questioning look. "Should we bring Estel with us? He has been rather odd lately, perhaps he would like to see Anor. . .?
"No, he is sleeping," Elrohir protested. "We shouldn't wake him."
"You're probably right," Elladan said, and they continued on.
"Oh, no," Estel whispered, realizing where his brothers would be. "Now I shall have to walk to Mirkwood, or leave on a later date. Perhaps I shall leave later. . ."
"You will not leave," sneered the voice, "you only want to stay here, because everything they say about you, all the taunts they use, are all true."
"That isn't so!" with that Estel grabbed the pack he had assembled throughout the week and climbed out the window. "I'll show you," he said angrily, "I will get to Mirkwood, and I will learn how to be an Elf. I'll be the best Elf that ever there was!" As he told himself this he marched along, towards where he thought Mirkwood forests would be.
Suddenly he heard a noise and he stopped, still as death. It was his brothers. Luckily they made no attempt at silence, and Estel had fair chance to hide from them. In the deep shadows, mingling with branches and leaves, Estel hid. He held his breath. His mind raced and sweat covered him. He was so afraid to be caught. . .!
The two Elves passed him by. For a few minutes Estel remained hidden, then he carefully walked back into the moonlight. His brush with discovery had taught him to be more careful, and he was considerably quieter, although he did not meet up with a single other being.
The moon was full that night, and shining brilliant silver over all Imladris, as well as (Estel suspected) the whole world. Despite this brilliant illumination no one noticed a small boy cross a bridge over a shining stream, the face of the moon reflected in the clear waters. No one noticed as the lone figure slipped further and further into the dark night.
For a mile Estel tromped on, not complaining to himself at all. A few leaves shone oddly in the moon's reflective light, and the mountains ahead loomed closer and closer to the child. He did not fear those mountains, for all he saw in them was an enemy, one which he would take pride and pleasure in conquering.
The first step upwards was easy. Though the ground was rocky and it was not light enough for Estel to find a path, that step did not hurt or tire him. "If I can do it once, there is no reason I cannot do it a million times more," he told himself. With each step Estel got higher and higher, and farther and farther from his home. "I can do this," he told himself, "once and a million times!"
But he was only a young child, and he could not. At one time he slipped. Rocks flew out from beneath him and tumbled down wards. Estel grabbed onto a tree root to keep from following closely after. His knees were screaming and his palms were raw. On all fours, Estel crawled over the root and nestled in the small nest it formed. The root curved upwards, and many leaves had gathered in the bend. This formed a soft area, and the root would keep Estel from falling.
Leaning his pack against the tree, Estel curled into a ball. His cloak kept him warm, and he was too afraid of wild animals too take off his boots. His thumb made its way to his mouth, comforting and warmed by saliva.
"I miss Ada," he whispered to the darkness. "And Elladan and Elrohir." The stars shined on him, and he gazed up at them. "I never knew there were so many. The Elves must know, I shall ask Legolas exactly how many when I find him." He wanted to cry. Legolas was great, always nice to Estel, but Legolas wasn't really his family. "I should not have left. What if they're worried about me?"
"Who would worry about you?" the voice asked.
"Ada would," Estel answered quietly.
"Then go back to Imladris. If all you can think about is how much your Ada is worried about you, turn back right now. You can be back in bed before the sun rises. No one will ever have to know about this. It can be our secret, just how you were too afraid. Go back now and be a disappointment to him."
"No, I have to be an Elf before I go back to Imladris!"
"And what if you fail?" the voice questioned in a sly voice. "What would you do if Legolas has not the time for a stupid youngster like you? No one will teach you how to be an Elf, Estel! You can never return to Imladris!" It was laughing now.
"No! No, he will teach me! I will go back, I will return!" Estel scrambled to his feet, grabbing his pack, and went on. He would continue all night if he had to, all night until he outran the voice. Pebbles slid out from beneath his feet as he ran. A few times he fell, but each time he got up and kept going. The mountain would not defeat him.
The sun was rising when Estel tumbled and had not the strength left to get back up. He let his eyes close and was asleep in seconds.
*****
"Have either of you seen Estel today?" Elrond asked of his sons.
"No," they answered together. Elrohir added, "But there is no need to worry. He rarely wakes this early, he is probably still asleep."
"Elrohir, it is near to noon," Elrond said, suspecting that Elrohir had no idea what time it was.
"Is Estel sick?" Elladan asked, suddenly paying attention. "He might be, that could be why he has not woken up yet."
"It's possible, but not likely," Elrond admitted.
"Why not find out?" Elladan asked. He almost added that Elrond was a healer, after all, but he left that unsaid. Elrond thought this a good suggestion and left to see if Estel was still asleep. Moments later he was back.
"Elladan, Elrohir, your brother is not asleep. In fact it is highly unlikely that he was in bed at all last night. I think he has run away."
"Run away?" Elrohir repeated. "Why would he do that?"
"Could he just be hiding," Elladan observed, "we should search inside before we panic." Within the hour, it had been deemed all right to panic.
*****
The early morning sun shone brightly, piercing his eyelids, waking him far earlier than he would have liked. He had hardly had a few hours of sleep, but he got up and started trudging along towards Mirkwood. Not once did he turn back, or he would have seen that he was farther along than he suspected.
"They probably know by now," Estel said to himself, "and are probably happy. Well, even if they try to find me, I shall be farther than they suspect, and by the time they reach this place I shall be over this hill!" With his words to support him Estel marched onwards.
All day without stopping he went. The sun did not shine so brightly, indeed now dark clouds imposed upon the sunshine. There were still trees, for they were strong trees and grew higher than most, and now Estel hoped that they might provide some shelter from the coming storm. Just as he was sitting beneath one to stop for the night, the sun's last rays peeking out from the horizon, there was a mighty clap of thunder and a flash of lightning. The rain came pouring down.
*****
"This rain is no good," Elladan commented. "It will wash away any tracks Estel left."
"Then help me follow these while we have got them to follow!" Elrohir requested irritably. He did not want to think about what sort of animals could have gotten to Estel. Where was that boy going? He could have drowned, been struck by lightning, or died any number of other ways. Elrohir stopped, Elladan a bit behind him. "Elladan," he said, choking up, and swallowing hard, "look."
"What is it?" Elladan asked, but when he saw where the tracks led he too wanted to cry. "We passed right by him."
"He was hiding from us."
Until then Elladan had believed that Estel was off on some playful adventure, but he no longer trusted to that. Any play adventure and he would have jumped out at the twins. "He's not coming back, Elrohir."
"He has to come back," Elrohir answered. "Or we will just have to bring him back." Following what was left of the tracks in the coming rain and darkness, he called, "Estel!"
*****
A new clap of thunder made Estel jump. He was beside the tree trunk, wrapped in his cloak, and shivering. The lightning and thunder frightened him. "I wish. . ." he began, "I wish I could find Rohi and Dan. I should not have left. No, no I had to leave! When I am an Elf, they will accept me for who am I, because then I will be an Elf." This hardly made sense to him, but it felt good to say it. It kept him through the storm.
Oh, how evil am I, making Estel suffer like that? Don't worry, I promise a happy ending! But perhaps some pain to reach that happiness. No more spoilers! (
To: Kawaii Blue Bear: Yes, trouble and lots of sap. He he, the way you said "stay" it's like Estel is a dog. Me: Estel! Roll over! Estel: Woof, woof!
To: Azaelia: Glad you like it. For more, scroll down. . .
To: Lina Sky: Hey, I know you! You reviewed Carrie's story, didn't you? You strangled her characters! Cool. . .anyway, yes bad things always seem to happen to Estel, but he gets the best sap stories, so that evens it out.
To: Anonymous reviewer: Thanks and for more scroll. . .
To: Stasia: Thanks and thanks!! Thanks about Estel's mind, as well, Freud studies are not helpful for children's minds (Freud was perverted, he connected everything to sex!)
To: da Twickster: Elflings really can be terrible. Hmm, maybe they ought to learn that it is *wrong* to be so mean to Estel.
To: Rae Maxwell: Thanks!
"He got the urge for going
And I had to let him go
He got the urge for going
When the meadow grass was turning brown
Summertime was falling down and winter
Was closing in"
~Joni Mitchell, Urge for Going
*****
Estel sat on his bed, looking at the window. "Are you going to stay, after all? Are you going to be a sissy wuss like the others say you are?" asked the voice in his head.
"Of course not!" Estel replied. "I am going to leave, I am going to go to Mirkwood!" He opened the window and was about to crawl through it when he heard noises in the hallway outside. He paused and listened to them.
"No, Elladan," Elrohir was saying, "I am only going out to see if Anor is all right." Anor, Estel thought, The sun? Elrohir was going to see if the sun was all right? Then he remembered that Anor was a horse, one that was with child.
"I will come with you," Elladan volunteered. The two passed out of Estel's hearing range, and he breathed a sigh of relief. "Elrohir. . ." he paused. Elrohir turned to Elladan with a questioning look. "Should we bring Estel with us? He has been rather odd lately, perhaps he would like to see Anor. . .?
"No, he is sleeping," Elrohir protested. "We shouldn't wake him."
"You're probably right," Elladan said, and they continued on.
"Oh, no," Estel whispered, realizing where his brothers would be. "Now I shall have to walk to Mirkwood, or leave on a later date. Perhaps I shall leave later. . ."
"You will not leave," sneered the voice, "you only want to stay here, because everything they say about you, all the taunts they use, are all true."
"That isn't so!" with that Estel grabbed the pack he had assembled throughout the week and climbed out the window. "I'll show you," he said angrily, "I will get to Mirkwood, and I will learn how to be an Elf. I'll be the best Elf that ever there was!" As he told himself this he marched along, towards where he thought Mirkwood forests would be.
Suddenly he heard a noise and he stopped, still as death. It was his brothers. Luckily they made no attempt at silence, and Estel had fair chance to hide from them. In the deep shadows, mingling with branches and leaves, Estel hid. He held his breath. His mind raced and sweat covered him. He was so afraid to be caught. . .!
The two Elves passed him by. For a few minutes Estel remained hidden, then he carefully walked back into the moonlight. His brush with discovery had taught him to be more careful, and he was considerably quieter, although he did not meet up with a single other being.
The moon was full that night, and shining brilliant silver over all Imladris, as well as (Estel suspected) the whole world. Despite this brilliant illumination no one noticed a small boy cross a bridge over a shining stream, the face of the moon reflected in the clear waters. No one noticed as the lone figure slipped further and further into the dark night.
For a mile Estel tromped on, not complaining to himself at all. A few leaves shone oddly in the moon's reflective light, and the mountains ahead loomed closer and closer to the child. He did not fear those mountains, for all he saw in them was an enemy, one which he would take pride and pleasure in conquering.
The first step upwards was easy. Though the ground was rocky and it was not light enough for Estel to find a path, that step did not hurt or tire him. "If I can do it once, there is no reason I cannot do it a million times more," he told himself. With each step Estel got higher and higher, and farther and farther from his home. "I can do this," he told himself, "once and a million times!"
But he was only a young child, and he could not. At one time he slipped. Rocks flew out from beneath him and tumbled down wards. Estel grabbed onto a tree root to keep from following closely after. His knees were screaming and his palms were raw. On all fours, Estel crawled over the root and nestled in the small nest it formed. The root curved upwards, and many leaves had gathered in the bend. This formed a soft area, and the root would keep Estel from falling.
Leaning his pack against the tree, Estel curled into a ball. His cloak kept him warm, and he was too afraid of wild animals too take off his boots. His thumb made its way to his mouth, comforting and warmed by saliva.
"I miss Ada," he whispered to the darkness. "And Elladan and Elrohir." The stars shined on him, and he gazed up at them. "I never knew there were so many. The Elves must know, I shall ask Legolas exactly how many when I find him." He wanted to cry. Legolas was great, always nice to Estel, but Legolas wasn't really his family. "I should not have left. What if they're worried about me?"
"Who would worry about you?" the voice asked.
"Ada would," Estel answered quietly.
"Then go back to Imladris. If all you can think about is how much your Ada is worried about you, turn back right now. You can be back in bed before the sun rises. No one will ever have to know about this. It can be our secret, just how you were too afraid. Go back now and be a disappointment to him."
"No, I have to be an Elf before I go back to Imladris!"
"And what if you fail?" the voice questioned in a sly voice. "What would you do if Legolas has not the time for a stupid youngster like you? No one will teach you how to be an Elf, Estel! You can never return to Imladris!" It was laughing now.
"No! No, he will teach me! I will go back, I will return!" Estel scrambled to his feet, grabbing his pack, and went on. He would continue all night if he had to, all night until he outran the voice. Pebbles slid out from beneath his feet as he ran. A few times he fell, but each time he got up and kept going. The mountain would not defeat him.
The sun was rising when Estel tumbled and had not the strength left to get back up. He let his eyes close and was asleep in seconds.
*****
"Have either of you seen Estel today?" Elrond asked of his sons.
"No," they answered together. Elrohir added, "But there is no need to worry. He rarely wakes this early, he is probably still asleep."
"Elrohir, it is near to noon," Elrond said, suspecting that Elrohir had no idea what time it was.
"Is Estel sick?" Elladan asked, suddenly paying attention. "He might be, that could be why he has not woken up yet."
"It's possible, but not likely," Elrond admitted.
"Why not find out?" Elladan asked. He almost added that Elrond was a healer, after all, but he left that unsaid. Elrond thought this a good suggestion and left to see if Estel was still asleep. Moments later he was back.
"Elladan, Elrohir, your brother is not asleep. In fact it is highly unlikely that he was in bed at all last night. I think he has run away."
"Run away?" Elrohir repeated. "Why would he do that?"
"Could he just be hiding," Elladan observed, "we should search inside before we panic." Within the hour, it had been deemed all right to panic.
*****
The early morning sun shone brightly, piercing his eyelids, waking him far earlier than he would have liked. He had hardly had a few hours of sleep, but he got up and started trudging along towards Mirkwood. Not once did he turn back, or he would have seen that he was farther along than he suspected.
"They probably know by now," Estel said to himself, "and are probably happy. Well, even if they try to find me, I shall be farther than they suspect, and by the time they reach this place I shall be over this hill!" With his words to support him Estel marched onwards.
All day without stopping he went. The sun did not shine so brightly, indeed now dark clouds imposed upon the sunshine. There were still trees, for they were strong trees and grew higher than most, and now Estel hoped that they might provide some shelter from the coming storm. Just as he was sitting beneath one to stop for the night, the sun's last rays peeking out from the horizon, there was a mighty clap of thunder and a flash of lightning. The rain came pouring down.
*****
"This rain is no good," Elladan commented. "It will wash away any tracks Estel left."
"Then help me follow these while we have got them to follow!" Elrohir requested irritably. He did not want to think about what sort of animals could have gotten to Estel. Where was that boy going? He could have drowned, been struck by lightning, or died any number of other ways. Elrohir stopped, Elladan a bit behind him. "Elladan," he said, choking up, and swallowing hard, "look."
"What is it?" Elladan asked, but when he saw where the tracks led he too wanted to cry. "We passed right by him."
"He was hiding from us."
Until then Elladan had believed that Estel was off on some playful adventure, but he no longer trusted to that. Any play adventure and he would have jumped out at the twins. "He's not coming back, Elrohir."
"He has to come back," Elrohir answered. "Or we will just have to bring him back." Following what was left of the tracks in the coming rain and darkness, he called, "Estel!"
*****
A new clap of thunder made Estel jump. He was beside the tree trunk, wrapped in his cloak, and shivering. The lightning and thunder frightened him. "I wish. . ." he began, "I wish I could find Rohi and Dan. I should not have left. No, no I had to leave! When I am an Elf, they will accept me for who am I, because then I will be an Elf." This hardly made sense to him, but it felt good to say it. It kept him through the storm.
Oh, how evil am I, making Estel suffer like that? Don't worry, I promise a happy ending! But perhaps some pain to reach that happiness. No more spoilers! (