Irina
Irina contentedly lay with her head pillowed on Jack's chest, luxuriating in his smell and his touch. He had indeed kept his promise. For 20 years her nights had been filled with dreams of what their reunion might be. She smiled to herself. Lying on the floor of the cargo area of a GOFER, roaring through tons of rock, had not been in any of them.
Jack propped himself up on one elbow, gazing at her. He began to lazily play with her hair. She could tell he was trying to work something out. She waited patiently.
"Irina?" he finally asked. "Why did you never tell me?"
She sensed the hurt behind the question. Hadn't she trusted him? Didn't she think that he would have risked anything to help her? She stalled. "Then? Or now?"
"Either. Both."
Irina sighed. "Jack, you'll never know how many times I wanted to tell you. I would watch you dry Sydney's tears when she scraped her knee, and dream that you would hold me in your arms and tell me it would everything would be okay."
She shifted slightly, so that she could look directly into his eyes. "But Jack, you had been married to a KGB agent for 6 years. If I had told you, you would only have had 2 choices - to send your wife and the mother of your child to prison, or to remain quiet and become an accomplice, risking exposure yourself. I couldn't ask you to make that choice. It was my mess. I needed to clean it up myself."
She could see Jack focus inward, see his struggle as he tried to work out for himself what he would have done if she had confessed to him. Try to find a third way that might have preserved all of them. She put her hand over his mouth, saying softly, "Hush. If our positions had been reversed, would you have told me?"
Jack's gaze cleared. He looked at her mutely, and slowly shook his head. He looked away for a minute. When he looked back, his eyes were bright with unshed tears. "20 years," he said softly.
A lump formed in Irina's throat as Jack lowered his defenses and let her see the pain and loneliness of his life since she had left. "Oh, Jack," she started, before tears began to fall. They clung together in a wordless embrace, mourning the life they might have had.
Minutes later, she gently disentangled herself and glanced at her watch. "Jack, we've got about 45 minutes before we get there. Why don't you get changed and rest? When was the last time you slept?"
Jack looked at her with longing. "This may be our last time alone for some time," he said with a hint of sadness. His hand began to move across her body, arousing her with his touch. "I can sleep later." He gently lowered his lips to hers.
Irina contentedly lay with her head pillowed on Jack's chest, luxuriating in his smell and his touch. He had indeed kept his promise. For 20 years her nights had been filled with dreams of what their reunion might be. She smiled to herself. Lying on the floor of the cargo area of a GOFER, roaring through tons of rock, had not been in any of them.
Jack propped himself up on one elbow, gazing at her. He began to lazily play with her hair. She could tell he was trying to work something out. She waited patiently.
"Irina?" he finally asked. "Why did you never tell me?"
She sensed the hurt behind the question. Hadn't she trusted him? Didn't she think that he would have risked anything to help her? She stalled. "Then? Or now?"
"Either. Both."
Irina sighed. "Jack, you'll never know how many times I wanted to tell you. I would watch you dry Sydney's tears when she scraped her knee, and dream that you would hold me in your arms and tell me it would everything would be okay."
She shifted slightly, so that she could look directly into his eyes. "But Jack, you had been married to a KGB agent for 6 years. If I had told you, you would only have had 2 choices - to send your wife and the mother of your child to prison, or to remain quiet and become an accomplice, risking exposure yourself. I couldn't ask you to make that choice. It was my mess. I needed to clean it up myself."
She could see Jack focus inward, see his struggle as he tried to work out for himself what he would have done if she had confessed to him. Try to find a third way that might have preserved all of them. She put her hand over his mouth, saying softly, "Hush. If our positions had been reversed, would you have told me?"
Jack's gaze cleared. He looked at her mutely, and slowly shook his head. He looked away for a minute. When he looked back, his eyes were bright with unshed tears. "20 years," he said softly.
A lump formed in Irina's throat as Jack lowered his defenses and let her see the pain and loneliness of his life since she had left. "Oh, Jack," she started, before tears began to fall. They clung together in a wordless embrace, mourning the life they might have had.
Minutes later, she gently disentangled herself and glanced at her watch. "Jack, we've got about 45 minutes before we get there. Why don't you get changed and rest? When was the last time you slept?"
Jack looked at her with longing. "This may be our last time alone for some time," he said with a hint of sadness. His hand began to move across her body, arousing her with his touch. "I can sleep later." He gently lowered his lips to hers.