Pre-Teenage Revelations
Epic Eight
Written by Cartman's Girl and Poe

And so, things went on, and years passed, kids became teenagers. Two of those teenagers were in Allison's room, a small, messy, but somehow cozy lair, with blue carpet and walls and a montage of glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. Allison had grown from a fairly scrawny, plain girl into an attractive young woman, once you got past her casual clothes and ever-present large glasses. She had her arms folded behind her head, swinging one foot off the side of the bed she was lying on, staring at the ceiling. Radge was on the other side, but there was a perfectly platonic amount of space between them.

"You ever wonder what it'd be like out there, Radge?" She wondered, after a moment of silence.

"You mean beyond our world?" asked Ragde, who had seemed to become more bishie-fied as he had aged. Now with long black hair tied back into an actual plait - course that got him a lot of remarks from Skool, not that he cared - and wore a black jacket over just normal lay-about clothes. But his boots were chunky and thick. Probably attrative enough to get Suzie back into her stalker mode.

"Yeah." She waved her hand at her ceiling, "Even just to see it, like what the Earth looks like on the outside. I mean, I know there are pictures, but.. they can't be much compared to the real thing." She set her arm back down, "There's a whole universe out there none of us have ever seen.."

"Hmm... and you don't know who's out there... the universe is far too big for human beings alone." he adjusted his purple rimmed glasses, another target of insults from students. She tucked a strand of blue hair back up into her NASA cap,

"Yeah. I mean, there must be all sorts of lifeforms out there, with their own ideas and culture totally different from ours.." She laughed slightly, "Maybe they've found ways to live and co-exist better than humans."

"Maybe they have... maybe they have wars too..." Ragde glanced off to the side, "Maybe some even live here on Earth and people just don't realise it."

"Here on Earth? Nah, I don't think so. I mean.. How could no one notice them?" She wondered ironically.

"Well..." Ragde looked at her, asking himself if he should tell her what he is...

"Someone'd have to be totally stupid to not notice that they didn't quite blend in." She shook her head and looked over at him, "Oh well. Maybe someday we'll be able to see, huh?" Whether she meant humanity as a whole or 'we' as in herself and present company was hard to say.

"Yeah maybe..." he replied quietly, then looked down at his black shiney boots and shook one foot, which was falling asleep. "Or maybe it'd be like some corny old science fiction movie about world domination.."

"World domination?" She echoed incredulously, then laughed, "Who'd want to rule humans? Most of the members aren't worth having slaves of." She pushed up her glasses and rolled to face him, "Some of them are another thing though.." She grinned, well, oddly at him. Ragde blinked, and looked back at her, then rolled onto his side so he now faced her.

"You think so?" he asked quietly.

"Well, sure," She propped her cheek up on her palm, tilting her head downward slightly, "Some of them are really cool." She grinned, "And nice, smart, cute, all of those things." She grinned, showing a few teeth.

"Hmm... well, I know just one human who fits that discription very well." Ragde replied, smiling at her somewhat shyly, yet with a hint of, dare we say, flirteous? She arched her eyebrows, but a hint of blush crept into her cheeks,

"Odd," She glanced to the side, then back at him, "So do I." Ragde smiled at her, then reached up and stroked her cheek with the back of his hand.

"It is a small world after all..." She glanced over at his hand, a full blush spreading across her features. She closed her eyes and smiled shyly, tilting her head against his hand,

"Hmm," She reached up, brushing his long forelock out of his face and cupping his cheek, "I guess so.." He closed his eyes as she cupped his cheek, blushing himself now. By now his human quarter part started acting up, if you know what I mean... anyway he now did want to kiss her, and he knew he wouldn't get an opportunity like this again in a long time. So, he opened his eyes and then leant forward, pressing his lips against hers and closing his eyes again. She blinked in surprise, but soon exhaled and relaxed into it, leaning forward as well, their glasses clinking together, and she slid her hand down his neck and to the back, stroking the fine hair there.

Radge held her face with his hand, his other hand slowly going around her waist. His antennae scythes wilting slightly since it seems most of his blood is rushing downwards at this present moment. She snuggled up to him, closing her eyes tightly, but blinking in surprise when she, ahem, felt something poking her. Her blush deepened, but she didn't break the kiss, leaned into it more if anything and hugging his upper back with her free arm. He made a muffled sound as he suddenly felt her leaning against him the way she was, and this seemed to spark more movements from him like saying, moving against her as well and putting his arms around her. Ragde even went far enough to at least attempt to turn the kiss into a more french one. Tsk, just like his Dad.

Unlike his dad, though, they were not likely to be walked in on. Allison made a muffled moaning sound and opened her mouth slightly, holding onto him tightly, practically clinging to him. She actually seemed unusually passive, but ran her fingers up through his hair, over the bases of his scythes, not realizing how sensitive they were, of course. This got a moan out of him, that's for sure. Ragde moaned against her mouth, sliding his tongue in past her teeth and moving it against hers. Course, half his mind wasn't into this and telling him this wasn't all that right, what with him being an alien and she not knowing about it. But, his hormones were more powerful then his concious.

She giggled muffedly, too drunk with hormones to really ponder his extremely long, agile tongue, and ran her fingers through the hair on one of his scythes, still thinking it to just be an odd hair style. The ends of his antennae curled up in tension, shivering at the tips. Ragde then rolled onto his back, pulling her on top of him. One of his hands remained on her side, sliding up and down slightly and the other was the back of her head. She blinked her eyes open as his hair actually seemed to tighten its grip on her finger, then she was pulled up on top of him, causing her to giggle futher. She was rather involved in the kiss, of course, but she pinched through his hair out of curiousity, blinking when her fingers landed on the firm, cylindrical antennae that was beneath the hair. It didn't register at first, so she kept fingering it, until it disturbed her enough to pierce through the haze of hormones. She managed to untangle their mouths, albeit reluctantly,

"Um, Raggy.." She mumbled in a slightly groany voice, "What's.. that.. in your hair?" Ragde laid there for a while, slowly making his way back to concious thought through the fog of hormones clogging his mind. He looked up at her, then at his hair.

"Uhmm..." he bit his lower lip, then glanced away. "Well... I... I think I.. I should at least tell you now.. b-but I should have told you before anything like this happened but I thought if I did, you wouldn't have anything to do with me and... and..." Ragde stopped his small rant, then looked up at her. "Allison I'm.... not... really from around here."

"Huh?" She looked down at him in confusion, letting go of his 'hair' as it seemed to make him, er, edgy. "What do you mean? I've known you since I started skool practically.."

"No, I... don't mean like that..." he sighed, closing his eyes. "I'm not from this planet." Ragde said quickly. She stared down at him for a while, then started laughing,

"I know I always go on about how cool it'd be to meet an actual alien, Raggy, but you don't have to make up a story like that just 'cuz you have a skin condition.." She patted his cheek, apparently ignoring the fact his skin was a bit rougher than that of a human.

"I, I'm not kidding." Ragde said, looking up at her. "I really am... a... alien." he then sat up, setting her back on the bed and pointed to his pod. "Haven't you ever wondered about that?" She blinked,

"I.. did.. but I thought it'd be rude to ask since I thought it was some kind of respirator or something like that." She didn't seem quite so certain now, peering over his shoulder to re-exmaine his pod.

"It's.. kinda like a life support system... also got some stuff in it which is handy..." Ragde pulled his hair out the way, to show her the black spotted metal pod. She touched it warily, then looked over at him with a raised eyebrow,

"So alright.. if you are an alien.. just where are you from?"

"Oh, I was born on Earth, as was my parents. My grandparents though... well... they came from a planet a long ways away." he looked up at the ceiling, which didn't just have stars on, but mini version of the galaxy, well, the ones humans know of. "See we're there." he pointed up to the Earth, "And Irk is..." he pointed to the far corner of her room. "Very very far away in that direction." She blinked, following his finger,

"So.." She looked confused, maybe torn between believing him and still being skeptical, "So your green skin.. isn't a skin condition?" She touched the place where his ear would be if he had one, "I always wondered just how you heard and smelled stuff.." He glanced to the side,

"I smell and hear because of my antennae.." Ragde made one of his antenane straighten up, then actually bend over and stroked at her forehead. "See..?" She eeped and jumped back suddenly when his hair apparently came to life, looking at it warily as it touched her forehead.

"W.. wow.." Was pretty much all she could manage, then looked over at him, "But.. you do have hair.. and.. your eyes look human to me.."

"Contacts." he replied sadly, looking down. "I got my hair from my Dad, since his Father was human... and my eyes sort of reflect that of a human, being mostly white." She tilted her head in interest, leaning it down so she regained eye contact with him,

"Can I see them..?"

"You really want to?" he asked, looking kind of surprised.

"Yeah," She smiled, "As like.. I dunno.. confirmation." He nodded slowly, taking his glasses off. After a second, the contacts came out and he opened his eyes, replacing his glasses. There were his pure white eyes, with black iris and the larger blackness to accompany it. She blinked, leaning away slightly, maybe taken aback by the slight shock. But she stared at him for a while, then smiled,

"Well.. I don't care what you are," She snuggled up to him and hugged him, nestling her head up beneath his chin, "You're still my Raggy." Ragde smiled gently, wrapping his arms around her shoulders.

"And you're my Allison... you know I always wanted to tell you, but... I kept thinking you'd turn me into authorities..."

"Hey, I'd never do that." She squeezed him, "No amount of fame or fortune's worth my.. best friend," She said the last words with a bit of uncertainty, considering what had been going on just a few minutes prior hadn't exactly been platonic.

"Hmm... best friends for years..." he said quietly, his antennae scythes folding back what with being free from any hair ties now.

"Yeah.." She said quietly, "Maybe.. something else too," she mumbled, against his neck.

"Thing is..." Ragde looked down at her, "My family isn't... that really fond of humans." She blinked up at him,

"I thought you said your grandfather was one?"

"Well yeah but... my Grandfather Zim never liked him." he replied. "Father came into existance because of an accident."

"An accident?" 'Course she was thinking along the lines of unplanned pregnancy.

"Heh, I should explain better..." he smiled gently, "You see, my grandfather Zim was the first Irken on Earth. He was sent to take control of the planet. But, one human knew what he was. Dib. Zim tried to make a cloning machine, but Dib interfered and the machine took his DNA as well as Zim's. Thus... my Father, Zib, was 'born', so to say." Ragde always found it to be an odd way to be created, but heck, at least his Dad was there.

"Oh," She giggled slightly at the idea, "I guess he wasn't the only alien here though.. right?"

"Ah well... see, Grandfather Zim's leaders are known as the Tallest. They hated him. That's why they sent him so far away." Ragde laid back on the bed, "To make him think he was on a real mission, my Grandmother Cten was sent to assist him." She laid back as well, snuggled up to his side, looking up at him and listening raptly,

"So did they have your Mom, too?" She was still a bit confused, heck who wouldn't be at a family tree like that.

"The Tallest? She was their maid, but told her to act like an Invader to make Grandfather Zim believe she was there to help him." Ragde explained slowly, then paused. "Yes that's it.."

"Oh." She pondered, "Just how many grandfathers did you have?" She looked puzzled, counting things off on her fingers.

"Heh.. Grandfather Zim, Grandfather Poe, and technically Grandfather Dib. But he's away at colledge." Ragde replied.

"Poe?" She echoed, that name being new.

"Ah well now, Grandfather Poe... he's a Reject." he said simply "Meaning he wasn't considered 'normal' by Irken standards, and forced to live in the slums."

"Oh," She wrinkled her nose slightly, setting her head on his shoulder, "I guess they aren't much better than humans afterall.."

"Meh, it happens to the best of us." Ragde shrugged. "But, thanks to his mother, my Great-Grandmother Xyth the Noble, he got to see the Tallest. Then, they gave him his own ship to check out other planets. He ended up here, on Earth."

"Man," She shook her head slightly, all this being somewhat hard to take in, "So.. lemme guess.." She pondered, "He and.. Cten, was it..? Met up and had your Mom?"

"Yup." he nodded. "To put it bluntly, yes. Then, my Mother and Father were friends then became lovers. But that happened while my Grandparents, minus Dib, were arrested." Ragde looked up at the ceiling.

"Arrested? Wouldn't the police have known they were aliens?"

"Not humans. Irkens. To my knowledge, Grandfather Zim reported to the Tallest that... Cten and Poe were together. Which is illegal, to reproduce with a Reejct." Ragde wasn't sure what the whole story was, just that they were arrested. As well as Zim. She nodded, starting to understand, well, as best as she could anyway, until she remembered something,

"Where did Athra and Vist come from, then..?"

"Grandfather and Grandmother must have.. uhm, gotten up to something while on Irk, because Mom told me when they returned, she had a new baby brother." yes, even Ragde didn't know what happened up on Irk between Cten and Snab. "While Athra, well Grandfather Zim met up with Grandmother Visthti. Who was also an Exile like him." he looked down at her, "It's all a bit confusing at first."

"I'll say," She laughed quietly, looking up at him and having hugged onto his arm somewhere between his explaination for Vist and Athra, "It's so cool, though, being a family of aliens right on Earth."

"Well it's the only place we feel really safe..." Ragde smiled at her. "We could have a choice and head out into the great black yonder... but we've had no need to at all."

"You always could though.. I've always felt.. I dunno.. trapped." She glanced out the window that was over her bed, "But yeah.. part of me is kinda glad I'm right here." She squeezed his arm, and added quietly, "Well, right now, all of me.." Ragde smiled, hugging her now.

"I'm happy to be here now... but once I learn how to use a Voot Cruiser, maybe one day I'll take you out."

"Really?" She looked up at him hopefully, squeezing him almost painfully tight.

"Yeah, why not?" he grinned at her, then reached up and took her hat off letting her blue hair fall free. "You want to, and I want to." She broke out into a grin, shaking her head and letting her hair tumble out, nuzzling his neck happily,

"Wow, it's so hard to believe all this is happening.."

"Well, it is..." Ragde held onto her, closing his eyes. "And I've never been so happy."

"Neither have I." She was silent for a moment, relaxing her grip on him, "You said they didn't like humans, though.."

"Well... my Grandfather Zim and his small family group aren't fond of them... I don't know how Grandfather Poe and his are, minus Vist of course. He hates people. Ivy doesn't like humans, I'm not sure about my parents though..." he then gulped, thinking back to when Zim told him about the time he replaced a man's brain with a squid's. She nodded slightly, glancing down,

"Well.. there's no real reason for us to tell anyone.. right?"

"I know... but I just... wait. Tell them...?" he stared at her, looking surprised. "You mean..?"

"Well.." She kept her eyes away, drumming her fingers on his chest, "What we were.. um.. doing.. not too long ago..kind of.. indicates.." she trailed off, blushing. Ragde smiled slightly, then with one hand lifted her face up to his.

"I'd really love to be that something else." She glanced down at his hand, then up at him, the blush still colouring her cheeks, but she smiled, wrapping her arms around him,

"I'd really.." She chewed at her lip, the next word a bit hard for her to say, "L.. love.. it too." She kept smiling, though it was quite a shy one. He smiled back at her shyly, then grinned happily.

"Yeah... we'll see how it goes..." Ragde was never sure a girl would be able to see him in that way, so of course he was nervous. She reached over, running her fingers through his hair again, but downwards this time, pulling out the binder that was keeping his pony tail in place.

"I feel kind of.. odd, saying this now, since we're not.. technically the same species.. but I always thought you were.. well, really.. cute." Ragde grinned, blushing slightly as his long black hair fell free of the binder and over his shoulders.

"Yeah I guess I am kind of like, some anime guy..." he laughed slightly, "I'm so bishie."

"Hey," She reached forward and tapped the place his nose would be, flicking the binder away, "I happen to like bishies." She grinned, toying with the nearest strand of hair.

"Obviously..." he smirked, "Guess the hottest anime bod's busy, time for under-study Ragde to steal the girl." Ragde smiled at her, then kissed her gently on the lips. She laughed and kissed him back, her giggles quieting to a happy 'hmm' sound, closing her eyes. The hand that was fiddling with his hair ran down his shoulder, underneath the collar of his black coat. Ragde made a purring sound from the back of his throat as he held onto her, hands at her sides as he held onto her. He never thought this would actually happen, but, for now things were great for him. He just hated the idea of when and if they ever told his family what the out comes would be.

[To be continued! I think]